I’m sorry, but yes you’re wrong. What would you do if dad had full custody and she lived there permanently? What will you do with your next child and this now baby is sick? I know there is not much you can do to help a baby that young when they get sick, but you get through it.
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100% yes you are wrong
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Not wrong to be upset but also not worth bringing up.
It happens and it will happen more
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So bc your son’s sister is sick she can’t come over or be around the baby?! I don’t send my kids off bc they’re sick and I have a baby… reevaluate and realize that’s your kid too now!
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That little girl is your other child. You cant send one sibling away because you have a newborn all of a sudden. That’s your life now as one big family. I think you need to stop viewing her as an outsider.
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If the 6 year old lived with you would you send them elsewhere while they where Ill? Also how do you think it would make the 6 year old feel that Dad wont have her at his as she has a cough and may make his new child sick.
If her father is as concerned about the childs health as you seem to be why hasn’t he taken her to get seen yet?
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Some of these posts I just can’t believe it how do you all still have your children:grimacing:
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Kids get sick, that’s just part of life. Especially when there are multiple children in The house. Viruses and what not will cycle through and that is life. You can’t keep the kid away, she has all rights to be there.
Why exactly didn’t the father take the child to the doctors if you both were so concerned for ALL children involved?
So if you and your SO get another kid you’ll send your sick kid away so your other kid doesn’t get sick? What’s wrong with you? She is your SO’s kid as well let him take her to the doc he is her father take responsibility!!!
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Take her to the doctors next time you have her to make sure yourselves
Would you send YOUR baby away when he/she gets sick?
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Umm kids get sick WELCOME TO MOM LIFE. stop complaining. The daughter deserves to see her dad regardless of how she feels. When you have multiple kids this happens. I watch 2 other kids guess what we were all sick together. My 2 and her 2 kids. Sickness as long as its not rsv will be fine. Chill out and deal with it
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Yea ur wrong. I dare my so to say my son, his bonus son cant come over cause he is sick.
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Pretty sure kids get sick…
Okay well I side with you in this. You aren’t wrong. Yeah they’re siblings whatever blah blah but it’s still rude. With my last daughter by bfs BM sent her daughter over to see the baby, the next day she stayed home from school sick with a cough. We have a newborn again and the kids still come here with their bad coughs. It pisses me off. If it was once a month they got to see their dad okay, BUT the kid should know that the baby can’t get sick so since your sick you stay with the mom. Away from the baby. Personally, anytime the kids are here I try to keep the baby away from them as much as possible. Which is hard because they wanna see him BUT them being able to see him is NOT worth your baby getting sick. Especially with the rsv & flu at such a high this year. F THAT.
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You’re only the girlfriend, she’s the DAUGHTER. Check yourself
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Still his daughter, sick or not. He should take care of her when she is healthy AND when she is sick. It’s called being a parent.
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You are definitely wrong.
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So let’s start with don’t have anymore kids. Because the other parent won’t be able to bail you out. Second it’s his kid. Wash her hands tell her to try not to cough on baby brother. And love her she doesn’t understand why she can’t be with dad. O and lastly fix your relationship with her mom. It will benefit you both.
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Your newborn needs are equally important and the newborn hasn’t had their shots yet. I would stay in my room and let daughter stay in her room at all times, have dad have her wash her hands and give her medicine. I think moms are just upset of how you worded things but I can’t blame you for wanting to protect your newborn from sickness it’s serious when a newborn gets sick and they can DIE. You’re deprived of sleep and your hormones are all over the place. They just think you’re picking on the daughter. Which clearly you just want bm to think and sometimes their just selfish and if you’ve had poor communication then I understand why you’re feeling this way. But put be cautious of your newborn at all times.
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The child’s father is as much of a parent to her as the mother. That’s sick or well. He should be sharing the responsibility of taking her to the doctor and taking care of her while she is well and sick. If she’s sick and with her dad at your house, he should be taking her to the doctor. You probably shouldn’t have another baby ever, they will get sick and pass it around. This is life. I feel bad for the kid. 
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I personally would’ve rather had my stepson when he was sick because then his dad and I knew how well he was being taken care of but I loved my stepson. You obviously don’t have that motherly instinct for this little girl. I feel sorry for the little girl that you will be her stepmom. That’s just my opinion
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YOU ARE WRONG. Yes that newborn is your child and you should worry about his well being, but that 6 year old is his child and should not be kept away from him just because she’s sick and YOU aren’t taking the right precautions to make sure new born doesn’t get it. That’s not the baby mamas problem to take care of. All she did was abide by court statement and send 6 year old over for dads weekend. She is in the right and especially if it’s just a cold a 6 year old doesn’t CONSTANTLY need to go to the doctor for a COLD
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Take her to the drs yourself, or I guess her dad if not married! Y’all should have already taken her.
Well if it’s his time to have his daughter it’s his time. I’d rather send her than get a contempt charge against me. After all he is her father and has to deal with the good an the bad just like her mom does.
It’s understandable you have a new baby and your concerned for his health but, she could of been better when mom sent her and she just relapsed. Happened to my daughter, she was fine for three days so I sent her with dad and she got sick again while being with him. Him and his wife have a new baby as well. Baby got sick but they didnt get upset. They simply said its bound to happen with kids.
Long answer short… what if it wasn’t your “step” child?
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Sounds like you just don’t wanna make things work with with baby momma and wanna argue about shit. Parents can’t pick and chose when kids are sick especially in the middle of January. Lol it’s literally the winter. For all you know that girl was fine, and she got sick over night. It does happen. Rather then try and push his daughter away because you had another baby maybe you should try to find a better solution.
Not wrong to be upset but it’s par for the course. She’s part of the family too and visitation schedules should be kept
His children are your children in sickness an in health …its just as easy for him to take his child to the doc as it is his ex …if your older child gets sick are you going to send them away …
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I’ve been in your situation MANY times. Not even once did I ever think of being mad about something like that. You are engaged, that is your child too. Shame on you for wanting her to stay away. Kids get sick. Its not a big deal. Me and this man aren’t together anymore and I STILL allow his son at my house sick or not because that boy still calls me mom (5 years since we split up and was also engaged). I get where your coming from with the sickness but you are in no position to be mad
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I can see where you are coming from being upset. But if she lived with you full time and she got sick then would you kick out until she got better?
Also in September I had a cough and after 3 weeks went to dr (after taking kids to dr for same cough and they were viral) I ended up w am upper respiratory infection - my cough lasted over months, and it was nasty sounding. Sometimes coughs last awhile and there is nothing wrong.
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One thing about this page, is if you have an issue with your husbands ex, the women on this page don’t care if you are a mother to your child, they are just gonna see you as some evil step mom. Step mom’s always get the bitchiest comments.
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As a parent you can’t stop parenting just because one child is sick. You can’t ship off the sick child you care for them. Maybe you shouldn’t be a step parent.
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If they were both your kids you couldn’t send the older one away. That is his child sick or not. Get over it kids get sick and as her dad he is responsible for her weather she is well or not.
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Um wow… so of you had more than one child you would make the sick child leave? Kids get sick, it’s a part of life. Its your step child not just some random kid youre “babysitting”. Your som sister, your partners daughter. If she was fine an entire night then she clearly didn’t not feel well before she got there. Also the whole “is she 110% healthy” comment makes me think you just don’t want her there or why wouldn’t you simply say 100%, you want her beyond perfect of 100% to be able to come over to her father’s house. Have dad take her to the clinic. I literally only had to read the question to know you’re in the wrong. Then the rest gave me the impression you don’t really want her over or something. Just my opinion and the way it came off to me honestly.
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Kids get sick. Get used to it honestly.
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A stepchild is also “your child” you don’t just get to pick and choose when she is sick . That baby is also her brother . You should care for your step child just like you would your own child . When your baby is sick you don’t just have him stay away !
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Idk. I have 2 step kids and they come sick. Kids r going to get sick. That’s why u seprate the sick ones from baby. I’ve dealt with my step kids coming puking and sick and etc. They knew when they got home they where to rest and stay away from baby and any other sibling not sick so we dont all end up sick in the home. You cant control the sickness. Everyone gets sick. That’s also your step child so treat the 6yo as you would your own child. Might not be your blood but that child is apart of your life. The fathers life and that babys life. You gotta deal with it. Accept the child as your own.
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Honestly you need to get over it. Just because she’s sick doesn’t mean her mother has to keep her,her father is more than capable of taking care of her. You have a baby,he is going to get sick from time to time that’s part of life. But for you to say that her mother should keep her just because she is sick is ridiculous,how would you feel if you and your spouse broke up and he told you “no you can’t send our son this weekend because he’s sick” …I kno that I’d be pissed off. You don’t get to pick and choose when to parent a child and if that’s what you want to do than you need to leave this relationship because his daughter deserves better than you
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Kids get sick…I’m honestly tired of these posts. If that was your biological child you wouldn’t send them away when sick, would you? I mean, I get being worried about your newborns, but you got to realize that parents, mom and dads both, have responsibilities to their children. ALL of them. Just because they have a mother or father outside of the home, doesn’t mean they shouldn’t take their children, whether sick or not. Grow up, you’re a mother. Deal with it 
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It’s the time for snot and coughs. It is what it is. You are wrong. And you in no way should be upset with the child. Or your SO.
If you have another child are you going to send the sick one to grandma’s house? What do think people with more than one child does when one is sick??? They try to keep them in other rooms away from each other and pray the other one doesn’t catch whatever it is Didn’t you know he had a 6 year old when you married him? Did you think just because he had another child he was going to treat her different???If you can’t treat her as your own, then you shouldn’t have married a man who already had a child.
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It’s sad that the dad is siding with you and trying to send his daughter away. Kids get sick, suck it up buttercup. It’s so ridiculous that you think the mom should keep her anytime she is sick. When the baby is sick are you going to send him elsewhere when the daughter comes over?
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When I starting dating my husband and became long term his son became mine. Him sick or not, he visits and I care for him as my own. When you guys made the decision to get engaged and get married, that lil girl is yours to. To care for and to love. Yes you are wrong. You already knew she’s been not feeling well for however long, you could of taken precautions of not letting her to close to baby. But no matter how sick she is you can’t keep her from seeing her daddy. If you can’t care for her while shes sick, you shouldn’t be a stepmom. Your marring her dad, so that means your marring into her life as well. My stepson is my world and I love him like my own and no matter how sick he is, I would never ask to keep him away. I baby him and care for him. Probably why me and his mom get along so well. Take precautions with new baby of keeping her not to close to baby, but she’s apart of your life now to. Yes you can be upset, but no you dont need to call her mom out like this. Kids get sick and it will happen a lot more. Get use to it.
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First be respectful and don’t refer to her as a baby momma. Second they are both his kids, at one point one kid is gonna be sick and not the other. Also she could be fine and both the baby and her just have congestion. Congestion and cough don’t mean your sick. It could simply be a cold which is a virus and can’t be treated with antibiotics
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Unfortunately you have to kind of suck it up. She can’t stop seeing her dad because she has a cold. The baby will build immunities this way also. Scary yes. But it’s the same as any other home with more than 1 kid in it. One gets sick, everyone gets sick. Welcome to motherhood.
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You should get a pair. Nasty fucking bitch !
I don’t see the issue here? My daughter is with us 50% of the time (7 days on-7 days off). I don’t just ignore my parenting time because she’s sick. She’s my baby. which is probably what your husband is thinking. Tis the season for the cold and much else. The exposure is good for the babies immune system as long as you act responsibly when it comes to making sure the newborn gets cared for it won’t be an issue. . I have a 7 year old (50/50 custody) and 13m old and I’m 38 weeks with baby 3. One kid doesn’t take a back burner because they’re sick and in need of some TLC.
Spray some disinfectant. Wipe stuff down and bleach the toys at night. Make sure she’s not coughing or dropping on his face and that she’s using sanitizer
Unfortunately your SO is still required to care for his child whether it’s sick or not. If that wasn’t your bonus child, you wouldn’t have the option to not care for the kid if it was sick.
She’s been sick for over a month her Daddy needs to take her to the doctor and you need to quit asking advice and do what you think is right for your kid
Kids get sick, however if she’s not going to take her to the doctors to get the proper medicine then she should let y’all, but her father shouldn’t have to ask he can just take her
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Get over yourself kiddo. Kids get sick. #life
What do you think happens with full siblings?
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Soooo, you’re upset because your daughter might make your son sick??? Bless your heart. Get some Lysol, and bleach and clean a little. Keep her from touching the infant, but love her, give her meds and watch a movie or something. You should be more worried about how your sick child feels and isn’t getting better. Quit with the her and his and remember “ours” .quit separating your home!
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I even keep my own children away from their other siblings (all biologically mine) when they are sick. I dont get mad but i watch extra close about them being in each others face and washing hands. I walk around with a can of Lysol. Kids are gonna get sick… Its a fact of life… But there are things we can do to keep it from spreading. We always joke and say " when you get sick you turn into the “red headed step child” and im sure it hurts their feelings to some extent but they will understand one day .
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You can’t not have his daughter in your house because she’s sick. He still has to be a father even when the kid is sick. 
I have a 6 month old, 2 year old,7 year old. My 7 year old keeps bringing home school germs getting my babies sick. My 6 month old spent a week in the hospital at 7 weeks old from RSV. I can’t send my child away when she’s sick so her siblings don’t get it. Why should the mom be the only one dealing with their sick child? It’s cold and flu season so 
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Why cant the dad take her hisself during his parenting time? Parents cant choose when to want to parent there child when it’s his time he has to get her,if she is sick go to the dr if you feel mom isn’t taking her when she is sick yet again dad should take her his self.
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The fact he wants to father his kids is already awesome! As stated by a few people, a parents time us a parents time
There are no sick days
There are no days off
You can’t push the 6 year old away
Just exercise good hand hygiene and try to teach her not to get too close to the baby when she doesn’t feel well.
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She needs allergy meds
As a parent we dnt get a choice when we want to keep our kids sick, healthy even when they are being a royal shit 
it’s just part of parenting… I hope she gets to feeling better & no one else gets it.
Kids get sick. Some more often than others. This is ridiculous really. You dont get to stop being a parent because you have a new kid and the other one is sick. Honestly her dad should be sticking up for her.
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So if your son gets sick will you send him away when you have your step daughter?! You are being absolutely ridiculous. You do what you can to keep sick and healthy kids separate in the house but not deny them time with their parent.
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Yes you are wrong. I get that you want what’s best for your child. But when you are with someone who has a child from a previous relationship you have to have some understanding that his time with that child is iimportant. That child’s time with it’s sibling is important. The best thing you two can do is take her to the doctor yourselves. You could have taken her and had her checked out while your child was being checked out. Really that simple. Her mother is not required to care about your child. She doesn’t have anything to do with him. She is only required to care about her child. You on the other hand are kind of required to care about her kiddo because you are with her father and play an active role in her life. So my advice to you is if she comes to your house sickly treat her symptoms and encourage lots of handwashing. As for issues with his ex bm both of you need to grow up because you are all tied together for the rest of your lives so you should just get along. Your children are watching you.
Kids get sick all the time I am a mom of 2 boys and basically a step mom to 2 girls kids get sniffles they get colds how dare u try to make that little one leave n not see the dad because they got a cough or a sneeze there has been plenty of times when my step girls came over n had developed a cough mayb the girl has chronic bronchitis which fyi is not the end of the world I can see if the child had the flu but a cough really how mean n just mayb the baby was already getting sick it is January
Maybe you should rethink being in a relationship with someone who has kids with someone else. You don’t get to say no the child is not your problem if it’s sick. Being a parent is 24/7. If it’s his time with his child his child should be with him period. Honestly I’m disgusted this question was asked as it should be common sense.
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Sorry but. Yes you’re wrong. He doesn’t just get to decide not to be a parent because she’s sick. Keep her away from the newborn and move on.
Umm when ur a parent u dont have a choice to have ur kid when they r sick or not…wtf…lol…deal with it…its his kid…
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Most stupid and selfish thing I’ve ever heard. Kids get sick some are sick longer than others so does that mean that little girl misses out on her father just because you have a newborn? Bless you. You sound like a dick tbf. Get some bleach and hand sanitizer
Sounds like you need to grow up. That is a child, HIS child sick or not. Hopefully your husband put you in your place.
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Dads should help too when a kid is sick. It’s not just on the mom.
Wow no wonder you and BM don’t see eye to eye . LOL. Step child or not she’s still your husbands child and like your child and if it’s her time with you guys then it’s her time. You both shouldn’t be picky about when to get her
That’s not how parenting works. If you had more kids would you send them off to a different house if they’re sick just because your 5 week old is there? UM NO. I think you’re being dramatic and over reacting, and personally if I was the BM I’d have an issue with you too. Kids get sick all the time . You said your baby is fine so get over it .
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When we were kids, before there was an immunization shot for it, we would get chicken pox. Instead of quarantining, we had sleepovers, so everyone could get it at the same time, and get over it.
You can’t protect your child from every single bug or virus. I understand your son is only 5 weeks old, but your daughter is part of your family. All you can do is try to minimalize direct contact (hugging, kissing, etc) until your daughter is feeling better. Use Clorox wipes or Lysol to try to keep exposure to a minimum. You can’t put a bubble around your son, and him being exposed to germs is how he will build his immune system.
Kids that stay at home and don’t go to daycare or preschool are sickly for the first year or so in school, because they haven’t been exposed to all the other kids and their germs at daycare for the first 5 years of their lives. Kids that go to daycare have a jump start on their immune systems, because they have been building antibodies to fight off all the germs and viruses they get exposed to.
As a new mother of a 5 week old, you are understandably concerned, and in “bear mama” mode to protect your infant. But you can’t isolate him from his sister every time his sister is sick. If you feel that your daughter is not getting the proper care for her congestion, take her to a doctor to get a second opinion. If she’s coming to your house sick, with no meds to treat the sickness, you might want to get that second opinion. Some kids have allergies and seem to be sick all the time, when they really just need some antihistamine or Benadryl. Some kids have asthma problems. They aren’t contagious. But if they aren’t taking medications for their conditions, they are more likely to get sick when others around them are sick.
My oldest boy constantly had sinus infections and ear infections when he was a baby. Turned out it was an impacted chunk of ear wax causing the problem.
So your child is ill you seek treatment…you stated that she was fine the first night at yours not the second…why didn’t you or your partner get her treatment…you are bashing bio mum when your partner is her parent and you have a duty of care to her as a stepmom…get of Facebook and take care of both children…and I get baby is young but daughter should get to see her daddy regardless…
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I don’t feel like freaking out about the “step daughter” is ok! Take her to the doctor. Why do you need permission? If it’s your week just do whatever a parent would do. My thoughts are shes your kid now too. So care for her as you would if you had 2 kids.
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Also stop referring to her as “her daughter” that’s THEIR DAUGHTER. They’re both responsible for her while she’s sick and while she’s healthy
You are wrong… Her father is her father sick or not! what would you do with you biological 6 year old if she was sick send her away? if not you should have been doing the same thing with his daughter to prevent germ spread so your infant didn’t catch it unfortunately that’s what happens colds spread but your feelings towards his daughter sounds more personal… right if given the opportunity and the mother was able she could have offered to keep her home and she should have told the truth but yet again inst required to and your wrong for thinking she should have.
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Holy hell you’re AWFUL. Like, I was paranoid AF about my baby getting sick when she was that little, but when the 4 year old we live with (who is neither my nor my partner’s child) was sick and asked me to hold him you bet your ass I did. Your step-daughter is your baby’s sibling and just as much your husband’s child as your baby. She has ever right to see her father and you’re absolutely shitty for trying to shut her out. She can’t help being sick, and if anything you should be worried about her and taking her to the doctor if it’s such a scary thing to you, not trying to keep her out of your home.
So if you have another baby 5 years from now where are you planning to send your first child if he gets sick? You, like it or not, have a 6 year old and a new baby. Your 6 year old is sick and got your baby sick. That’s what happens when you have kids.
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I grew up in a house with 6 children. If one of us got sick we all ended up sick. You can’t just send one child away if they are unwell. If your step daughters cough was that bad when she was in your care her dad should have brought her to be checked out. I know your son is precious to you but remember your stepdaughter is just as precious especially to your partner they are equal.
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Honestly, I’d be pissed. At 5 weeks old, that is SUPER dangerous. I’d be mad mama.
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I think you’re over reacting here. The kid has a cough. When your son is ill are you going to send him away if your stepdaughter is healthy? It sucks your child caught a cold - but that’s what happens. To EVERY child. I’m a mum to five, when one gets ill you don’t get rid of them to protect the others. I hope the stepdaughter hasn’t picked up on this behaviour, and if she has I sincerely suggest you apologise to her.
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Like I just have a bigger problem with you referring to her as “their daughter” apparently you don’t try to have a relationship with her or her mother:eyes:
and it doesn’t matter he’s her parent and should spend time with her as much as possible rather sick or not… you’re a mom you know not to let her in the babys face!! if she was sick take her to the doctor, while she’s in your care you’re responsible for her!! Smdh!!
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I might be the odd one out on this post. Cold and flu season is no joke especially when you have a newborn baby! I would maybe just ask the daughter’s mom if she would mind keeping her until she’s one hundred percent healthy and maybe try offering Elderberry or multivitamins when the six-year-old is with you! Have her practice good hand hygiene and covering her mouth when coughing or sneezing.
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I pray that when I have kids none of you send sick kids to be around mine.
She’s not trying to push the daughter away. She’s trying to protect her FIVE WEEK OLD FROM SOMETHING PREVENTABLE.
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If she was your own child and you also had a 5 week old baby would you get rid of her because she’s sick? Very wrong to be mad over that. when you get involved with someone who already has a child you are making a commitment to love that child as much as your own you are making a commitment to be a parent to that child to you don’t get to pick and choose… If she’s sick take care of her don’t be mad that she came to your house sick. I have three children I cannot get mad if one of mine comes home from school sick and ship them off because I don’t want my other kids to be ill. There is no difference other than the fact that you’re looking at it as not your child …as a random visitor coming into your home.
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Why dont YOU take her to the doctor? You’re supposed to love her like your own and if she isnt being medicated or treated you need to step up.
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His kid, his days, the kid comes over sick or not. Its no different then him having her 24/7 and her getting sick. If your so worried about her constantly being sick have him take her to the dr. We have 3 kids and they constantly pass everything to one another, get used to it.
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I have 6 kids. Someone is always sick. I cant remove the sick kids. It happens be a parent and get over it
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A mother/stepmother is supposed to nurture the child and nurse them back to health not push them away. I take my nieces & nephews every time they are sick when mom has to work even with my kid home. When they are sick they don’t feel good, it’s your job as a parent to make them as comfortable as possible while they feeling shitty… would you send your baby away so it doesn’t get his daughter sick?
If you dont trust the bio mom take her yourself instead of acting like its a huge deal. Your marrying a man who has another child. I understand its a newborn, but your not a first time mom. What happens if somebody said that shit to you? Its called BE A MOM!
Ummm so what if it wasn’t a step child. You don’t get to send you kid away when it’s sick. I can see why the mom and her don’t see eye to eye. I can’t even believe this post😐
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I think your a wicked step-mother to put it bluntly. If the child was yours would you ship her off until she was better? She has every right to see her dad poorly or not. Especially if she is poorly and wants him. Its winter for goodness sake, kids get viruses! It’s not a valid excuse to stop the kid seeing her dad or being part of what is supposed to be her family ffs! Its unfortunate your 5 week old also got a virus however he could just as easily have got it when you’ve been out or another relative because they are spread that easily. Silly daddy marrying someone who would treat his child like this!
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Maybe you should read up on what it means to be a step parent, maybe it’s just not for you
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You are wrong—It seems like you’ve made a hierarchy in your household and I feel for that 6 year old kid at the bottom, especially when that kids father—your husband—isn’t making a place/sticking up for him in your family.
I wonder what’s going to happen if your husband divorces you and your children become stepchildren? Would he stick up for them then?
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Sat morning the dad should of takein her to the dr. Hes her dad he doesnt need permission to take her to the dr y senf the kid back i would of takem her the dr my self. If u
It was ur own kid sick u would of taken her with a possibility of the little one still gettimg sick it happens…not every parent is gonna think of their exs newborn when sending over the child.
Your step daughter is your DAUGHTER now too… when you guys have another child together and that child gets sick what are you going to do?? They are siblings you just sanitize everything and make sure you throw away any boogie tissues and wash hands all the time… I swear if my husband and I ever got divorced I would never want my kids in a home with someone like you just knowing that is your mindset and you would never treat them as your own 
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What happens when your 5 week old is 3 or 4 and you have another baby. Your 3 or 4 yr old is sick and now you have a newborn as well… Gonna send your sick older kid off to stay with family? Thats his kid, sick or not. Treat his kid like your own and take her to the damn dr if shes sick
It’s her house too. What is she supposed to do. Just stop coming because she has coughs!?
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You’re completely wrong for being upset. I have a newborn as well. Born this month on the third. I’m also a stepmom to a five-year-old girl. She recently just came over sick, but not once did I say she couldn’t come over or that she had to leave. I simply made sure she took her medicine and that she didn’t cough near the baby. Plain and simple you don’t get to chose when you wanna be a parent.
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