Sounds like your son has a father, that sperm donor needs to go
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DONT CHESE THAT FOOL! THATS THE COPS JOB! MOVE ON & LET YOUR BOYFRIEND BE THE BEST DADDY HE CAN BE TO YOUR CHILD!
#HappyFathersDay
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Set some new boundaries where you do what’s convenient for you two!
Don’t waste your time hes not worth it. Sperm donor only
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Get him to sign papers because if he decides to take u for visitation, whether he pays monthly or not, u can not keep baby away. If ur man such a good step dad, tell him to adopt him. My husband did that with his ex and we have full custody of him now. The fact u cut him off is a good thing but u need to cover ur bases legally
As a single mom I would get a lawyer and have him contact him about vidtation or ending his rights, I would talk to step dad about adopting him, get a written agreement from dad
sounds like me kids dad , he has 5 other kids and decides which ones he wants to be a dad to , so after 16 months I cut him off , I’m not letting him play games with my child anymore
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We as a family cut my daughters Ex off just because his story is exactly like yours. My granddaughters considers her stepdad as her father since she was 5 years old. Her sperm dad as she calls him is a loser. My granddaughter her father ( step dad ) to walk her down the aisle when she got married! Love wins!!!
This is her grandfather.
Fuck him off his a useless piece of a human being no good to himself let alone a child … I wouldn’t give him the time of day move and don’t let him know where he can’t afford a lawyer so he won’t be able to afford one to look for u
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Find yourself an attorney that specializes in family law, and take it from there.
Seems to me you have two choices.
1, love your child and let his bio father come and go from your childs life as he is doing and let him learn what his father is all about on his own while still having the love and support from a step father to counteract that.
2, Love your child and refuse access to the bio father to protect your child from hurt, but run the risk of him resenting you when he is older for keeping his father away.
Its a tough choice that only you can make.
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Not sure where you are from but here is some Canada laws.
He is the child’s biological father and without a court order giving you sole custody he has a right to have access unless you can prove to a judge that the child is in danger from his dad.
2 child support is separate from access you say he is way behind so I assume you have a support order from court if so take him back to court for an order to pay arrears,
3 courts are usually extremely reluctant to terminate a parental rights
4 you are within your rights to ask for supervised access especially considering your little one doesn’t know him
5 my opinion I would send him pictures of your son and a progress report every 3-4 months perhaps that is all he is looking for.perhaps he feels the little one is more secure in his current situation and he doesn’t want to confuse the child
I have totally been there .in the end we cut all contacts with father and his family.this stuff messes up the Child head.
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I feel like I am having the same issues. My son is 3 (no step father or BF though) my BD calls when he wants to and is nice when he wants to be. But hasn’t sent a dime or a pack of pampers or wipes. NOTHING, And constantly calls me out of my name ANYTIME I say something he doesn’t like. So we don’t speak for a while THEN when he feels like it calls and usually is fine for a few days AND then boom,BiPolarness starts I’m this and that and he doesn’t want anything to do with me or his son. Same cycle again and again. IM 🤏🏻this close to saying STOP 
calling stop being in and out (when you want). But I don’t want my son to blame me when he is older. BUT I also have numerous recordings of these “episodes” that clearly show him bullying and disrespecting me and his son. 
If you deny access you risk huge resentment from your son later on in life no matter how big of a loser his biological father is. I know he’s only two but I suggest being honest with him as soon as he is old enough to understand. It sounds like your boyfriend already is his dad and that’s wonderful! Kids figure out who they can count on pretty young.
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You need to go about it legally so the law is always on your side.
You are not responsible for your son’s biological extremely narcissist father. Ignore completely if he wants a parenting plan and a child support order he can do all that without you. Take care of your child that’s all your responsible for.
Go to court and get full custody first.
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Then you shouldn’t have had a child with him. You can’t dictate the relationship because you’re also to blame.
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My biological father didn’t want anything to do with me. He signed over his rights when I was 6 (I remember seeing him sign the paper) and my dad who I met when I was 4 then adopted me 
In your situation, it’s for you and your child’s best interest to have him become adopted by his step dad since he already knows him as his dad 
If he won’t sign over his rights, get a lawyer…
Unfortunately, it’s a little easier said than done. I have a disabled son who is now 10 years old and his dad hasn’t seen him since he was 6 WEEKS old because “it’s too hard to have a f<cked up kid”. We’ve been to court numerous times- mainly because he doesn’t keep up on child support (enough to keep him out of jail which is literally only $373 every four months). He has actually told the judge that he didn’t want anything to do with that “jacked up kid”. The judge still hasn’t had him sign over his rights. There’s absolutely no visitation and he has no custody but the judge wants him to keep his rights and “learn his lesson” by racking up child support. The judge did tell me that he’d be more apt to have bio dad sign over his rights if I had someone in my life to adopt him and help me. Which is obviously complete horseshit. I’ve bowed out of dating for years now because it is a tough situation to bring anyone into. I’ve always had guilt that because his own dad couldn’t be a man and deal with a disabled child, it would be too much to ask anyone else to jump in. The walls are huge lol Now, I’ve learned that I can’t even change my sons last name unless all rights are signed over 
thanks judge 
Genuinely hate seeing that last name… good news is- every one in my small town knows my son well enough and his name is unique enough that everyone just calls him by his first name 
Good luck… could be a very, very long road.
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I have kind of the same situation except where your sons bio dad has “attempted” to see your son mine did not. Met my now husband when I was 7 months pregnant and he’s been there since, he was even in the delivery room and cut his cord. We are going through the motions now for him to adopt him, he’s the only dad my son who is now 6 has ever known. Luckily mine signed all the paper work and made everything alot easier and cheaper. Everything is done now just waiting on the paperwork being filed and getting his birth certificate changed and in to change everything else. You can take him to court and but the judge will make the decision and could possibly assigned a GL which is a lawyer(that you’ll have to pay for) to represent your son and make sure your husband adopting him and taking all his Bio dad’s rights away is in the child’s best interest which technically of he had no proof where he “attempted” to see him its pretty much abandonment. Hopefully everything will go smoothly with whatever y’all do and it works out.
I don’t think so , I was married to my ex husband for 20 years , and since the divorce I have allowed him to see his kids and send them to California. Where ever and whatever but these last four years he has been so unhealthy , and he only speaks bad of me to are you gest son, are older kids are on there own so they can decide. But I cut him off recently , put a no tress pass order told him to take me to court until then stay away for the safety of our kids and myself. He now calls the older kids and threatens them all sorts of crazy shit . If it’s best for the kids it’s ok don’t even feel guilty one bit I always stayed for our older kids. I should not have, it’s out duty to protect our kids. If he’s serious e the judge can decide and if you and your bf ever get married or talk about adoption I would do it and take him to court take his rights away and see where his head is at , instead of him feeling in control and unhealthy.
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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Am I wrong to cut off my childs biological father? - Mamas Uncut
He sounds like a waste tbh… I’d he doesn’t wanna know then don’t contract him at all is he really wants to know he will make a whole lot of effort! X
Honestly yes you would be doing the right thing . And DO NOT LET HIM TAKE THE CHILD UNTIL CUSTODY IS SIGNED BY A JUDGE
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You need to keep some form of communication open so you’ll look like the better parent for the courts. It’s better to say he hasn’t reached out for X years then him say you blocked him from everything. I would make an email address and give it to just him.
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I feel like blocking him would make the courts view you as trying to alienate the child. As much as it sucks it’s part of comparenting if he ever did get a lawyer and go to court he may be able to use it against you
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CUT HIM OFF . Took me 5 YEARS! And it’s sooo much healthier!
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Cut him off, I wish I would have done it sooner. Never heard from him again. The back & forth is more toxic then just completely cutting him out
Yeah the hell with him,kick him to the curb where he belongs
I wouldn’t ever prevent his biological father from seeing him, or he’ll resent you when he gets older.
What you should do is set up boundaries. If he wants to see him, he must arrive within 15 minutes of the time he says, or he lost the opportunity that time.
Also it would be good for you to set up a custody argument with the court, it is fairly inexpensive and sometimes you can even have any filing fees waived.
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Nope I stopped letting my ex see my child he came around 3 times when my son was 2 went MIA than was demanding to see him when my child was 4 so I told him no I wasnt going to let him come in and out out of my childs life and cause him damage I met my now husband when my son was 6 and my son truly believes my husband is his father and doesnt even know he has a bio dad I did it to protect my child from that pain! My son is now 11 and still doesnt know he has a bio dad! The bio dad threatened to take me to court till this day I’m still waiting!
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Cut him off. A dad is a dad because of love and conscience. Let the step dad be dad. Protect ur child! Good luck!
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I never blocked him he always had my number and address. I nevertold my son anything incase he never showed up &eventually I started saying no and told he could take me court if he was serious. My son doesn’t even know him and I wasn’t gonna let him in and out of my son’s life.
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My son’s father never wanted to come around and now he’s 12. My intention was to completely ignore but I shifted the communication through a designated neutral person who deals with anything so I never have to see him, involve etc and the minute theirs games, which their was by talking nonstop about other things and not his child, I cut him off. My kid, my rules . I see ladies being too nice and sharing their kid. Definitely not. You get cut off and you can have another kid.
Bio dad /= father. Anyone who isn’t consistent in a child’s life doesn’t deserve to be there.
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You do what you think is best for your child . From a similar personal experience I didn’t block but I did document every single failure to appear or show up and files for abandonment and that was that . It’s been 10 years and he hasn’t seen my child since she was 2. I did it bc my child deserves better.
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You owe him nothing. He does not support his child financially, emotionally or physically.
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Nope you aren’t wrong at all! Ask him to sign over his rights so he doesn’t have to pay child support. He will most likely do it. I told my sons father " You are either in his life full time & on a regular basis or not at all because I refuse to let you play mind games with my son!" He chose to stay away. 15 years later he still isn’t around…smh
You need to cover your ass legally and file for sole custody and maybe petition for him to lose parental rights, that means he would no longer be responsible for child support.
Check your laws for child abandonment. Don’t give him any hints about being cut off. Don’t message first and when it gets to the period of time needed then file abandonment and get full custody. Or just go to court and explain everything and get full. You’ve been nice enough and it’s time to give your child stability
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Your child needs consistency from him. If he can’t provide that on top of many other things that he deserves from a father then so be it. I was raised by my step father. But growing up he was daddy. I didn’t know any difference until I was 22 and needed my birthday certificate to get married. That’s when my mom explained that my biological father gave up his rights after my grandfather offered to buy him a car to stay away from me. He didn’t want to commit to being a father but lucky for me my mom met and married a man that did. Do what you think is right for your son. If having bio dad in the picture no longer serves him or could be damaging to him in the long run do what you have to do. Prepare yourself tho for the possibility of your son regressing and wanting a relationship or at least information on him later in life. It’s normal human behavior to question why he was kept from him and even reach out to have a potential relationship with him as a late teen or early adult.
It’s not wrong of you to want to protect your child. It certainly does not make you a bad person. I left my first husband when our daughter was 7, she’s now 24. Ever since I left him he’s been in and out of her life due to his drug addiction. I have watched the pain my daughter has endured through the year’s and it’s not fair for any child to have to experience that.
If there is a court order for child support and visitation legally you can’t deny him access to your child. I’d recommend trying to get him to sign off on his parental rights so you don’t have to worry about it anymore. You might want to contact a lawyer and see what rights you have as of right now and what the process is to have his parental rights revoked if he does agree to it.
He is one sick f___, he is just playing with his child’s emotions. So put a stop on it till u have to share. But if child is old enough let him decide what they want
Do what you believe is best for your son. But coming from a family where my dad walked in and out it definitely affects your mental health.
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I feel like I’d block him. Not worth his time, not worth mine
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Don’t block him, let him know and stick with it, IF he wants to be his father he needs to act like one. If you have a court order that stipulates child support, then you can pursue it through legal channels. The courts can and will make him provide childsupport or go to jail. Give him enough rope and he will hang himself.
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Sounds like you have given your ALL… your heart is right. It’s a shame his isn’t. Put it in Gods hands.
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Blocked on social media but always had a number to call and addess … Soon it was just an inconvenience!
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Is he on the birth certificate?? Does he pay child support?? No?? Then he has no rights to the child…your son has a daddy. No reason to bring the other guy in.
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My son is 12. Knows who is father is. My son has 7 siblings .he call his dad HIM never dad or by his real name. He only sees him for the summer and only because my sons gma has him and he happens to go over there but there’s no commitment what so ever. My son says he don’t need him when he has me.
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Get a lawyer, the judge gave me 100% custody & decision making. We made a parental plan, he once again was inconsistent…she wasn’t having it…done!
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Hun being a single momma here whose youngest is 2 and has never met his father I dont blame you for wanting to cut him out. If having him around isnt beneficial for the child then you do what you gotta do as his momma.
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Ultimately, its your decision (.) But just always consider your child’s feelings and not just YOUR own when making ANY decisions. Good luck🍀
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Take him back to court
Make him take u to court. If there’s no parenting time arrangement u won’t be in trouble for anything
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Just take him to court and revoke his rights, he can maintain a half attempted relationship with your son without a legal right to make yourself feel like you have to waste his time.
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Shit least he asks you to see him . Mine comes across his son if he happens to go tobhis grandmas or he calls him from grandmas phone.how did you go about the notary and finding resources cause I’m over it too. I dont even get mad anymore, its on him. But mines 6
Just go to court and Get Full Custody. Don’t block him just yet because you need proof to show that you have been begging him to come and spend time with his son. Keep some form of communication open for court so you won’t look crazy in court to the Judge.
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It’s been 2 years, if he wanted to be a dad he would have stepped up at any point in the last 2 years. It’s not healthy for a child to see one parent being inconsistent and not making good efforts to be present and be a parent
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I was in the same exact situation, my son is now 16 and has no contact with his biological dad and that’s because of his inconsistencies. I will not have someone bringing pain and heartache into my childs life so he can say “look what I did, I’m not a deadbeat” and then not hear from him for months at a time. I haven’t blocked him but he has blocked himself because my son now has no desire to pursue a relationship with him, he has a father my husband and I don’t feel bad about it at all. Do what you have to do to protect your child’s emotional health.
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Just stop making effort. He’ll show his true intentions. I had to do this with my ex. It’s been years since he has seen them. All by his choice. I told him the kids are available and he knows how to contact them, he just can’t do the 1 thing I ask. Be consistent and make the effort.
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Yes id say its wrong
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Later in life he will definitely regret it,fact,
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I go through this with my daughter’s father. Have since she was one, she’s eleven now. I have never kept them apart. I’ve always said I wanted my daughter to make her own decisions. Well now that she is eleven and she has seen that he has never been there she wants nothing to do with him. It’s heart breaking to watch them go through it. I would pray he would just disappear sometimes. But knowing I never kept her from him and that I made the decision to let her see for herself I know that she has made the decision herself not to see him and that she won’t resent me later on for keeping him away.
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Go file for sole custody. Make sure you have documentation of all of what you just mentioned-odds are, you’ll be granted sole custody, especially if he doesnt show up.
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Cut him off and he can go to court for visitation. It’s not fair to you or your child.
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No you are not a bad person. You are protecting your son. Get court ordered supervised visitation and then step back. He will have to navigate the system to assert his parental rights. Make him work for it!
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What part of him do you want to cut off I have a suggestion if you need Bobbit that should make him understand the child always comes first
No. My sons bio dad stepped out immediately after the pregnancy and tried to fuck around w us ONE time. After that I told him if he wanted to see him he could go through a lawyer since he didn’t want to be on the birth certificate anyway and had no rights. Never heard from him again. It’s been 4 years, legally it’s abandonment and he couldn’t get rights if he tried. My husband will be adopting him in December.
Don’t block him because once a court takes his behavior into consideration, the court will then take YOUR behavior into consideration.
If dad lawyers up, and is lucky to find that 1% of actual effective lawyer… that lawyer can establish you violated the child’s US First and Fourteenth Amendment rights by unilaterally deciding to alienate. Let the court cut the ties.
“Constitutional rights do not mature and come in to being magically only when one attains the state defined age of majority. Minors, as well as adults, are protected by the Constitution and possess constitutional rights”. Planned Parenthood of Central Mo v Danforth, 428 U.S. 52, 74 (1974)
“Niether the Fourteenth Amendment nor the Bill of Rights is for adults alone.” In re Gault, 387, U.S. 1, 13 (1967)
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Go to your lawyer and have abandament papers drawn up right now he has access to your child what if he gets a nut job girlfriend who cannot have kids she could screw tour child up better safe than sorry
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Happened to my oldest , I gave the biological dad a choice either your in or your out … (I had no lawyer , support orders or anything- also never received a dime from him, nor did I care ) he didn’t contact him until he was 16 , (he’s 21 now) my son made a choice to see him a few times when he can (bio dad never drove to see him, my son always drove to see him ) my son will ask him for expensive things for his bday or xmas … laser eye surgery , $2000 computer etc …
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Go to court and you telling him to go away and blocking him from the child can backfire on you. Let the court handle it.
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Bio dad is just like a stranger to the kid. Don’t block him because courts will use that against you, but ignore anything and everything from him until it comes from a lawyer. When and IF that ever happens, don’t respond, but instead take it to your lawyer to respond. You can always file for full physical and legal custody. I would definitely file for physical custody ASAP because he could grab the kid and keep him since there is not custody order signed by a judge. You would have to wait to get in front of a judge to get your son back and sometimes that can take months. Good luck and way to go to your bf for stepping up. It’s not blood that makes a man a daddy, it’s the support and love he gives a child.
You have to go to court or you will be in the wrong no matter what. I went through the same thing for seven years before I went to court. Keep records of all his no shows but you still showing up. That really helped me. And not to sound rude but unless you and the other man are married, that is not his dad or step dad. That two can change with all the crap you are going through. Stress can change a relationship for the worse. Think about your son and go to court
Go to court for abandonment and get his rights terminated. Then your husband can adopt him. It’s difficult to do, but you may just have a case for it. Ask a lawyer.
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You aren’t wrong if he doesn’t want too act like a father then technically he isn’t one.
If you’re child wants too reconnect with his real father when he becomes of age then sure until then fuck the sperm donor 
You did EXACTLY what youre supposed to do!
Get a lawyer let them handle this. Id unblock him. As annoying as his messages are and you’re let down again again. The court may or may not see the blocking and it may backfire
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It’s not wrong love
The in and out and not making an effort will cause more harm than good, you have to do what’s best for you baby and if that means the bio father isn’t apart of his life than that’s how it has to be, you’ve tried and made efforts and that’s all you can do, you can’t force someone to be a father if they don’t wanna be
One day soon he might realize his mistake and hopefully want to become a father but until then it might be best if he just stays away
I had to do the same thing with my children’s father and although I hate having to do that I have to do what’s best for my kids, their father abandoned us in the middle of the night twice, cheated and was physically and mentally abusive, I finally had enough and left
You’re doing great mama unfortunately we as mother’s have to make these kind of tough decisions and though we’re judged for it sometimes
we have to do what we have to do
Do not block . But there are ways . If possible on your end . Hire an attorney have him served with papers where you require written proof he has to notify you 10 to 14 days in advance in writing that he is coming to pick up said child. You are covered legally no letter in writing no visitation… I had to have my visitation orders amended 3 times when my ex would pull that stuff on my sons
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If you cut him off or block him that puts you in contempt of court. Document everything and keep records
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Never block him, it will have him saying he can’t get in touch bc u blocked him & that he ‘tried.’ Lawyers & court always the best bet before u do anything.
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For your peace of mind then block him. It’s not against the law. And you won’t be the first. What if you didn’t have a phone? Lol He’s still playing you. I’m sure someone will tell you if something needs to be addressed. Just do the “ get it in writing “
In some state if a parent does not pay child support and all sometimes the courts will terminate their rights and then the one he knows as his dad can adopt him, get a lawyer and see if this can be done .
You can block him on any and all social media but he has to have a way to contact you. My baby daddy has my number and if needs anything or ever decides to want anything can. We’ve been to court. They said as long as you both have a open path of communication there is nothing to say you have to have them on social media. My baby daddy is not on mine because it’s mentally worse for me then to just give him my number.
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Usually I’m not for cutting one off from their kid but he cut himself off.
If he’s that far behind in child support there should be a warrant for arrest
So basically you got pregnant by someone was with someone else in the midst of your pregnancy who calls this child dad and you are still getting this man for child support. Doesn’t make sense. Terminate his rights and leave him alone.
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No. Just forgive. I know it’s really hard but believe me it will give you peace God is working in your life. Your ex will have his own conscience if he see your son growing up.
Just leave it all your worries, stress and anxiety to our Lord he will give you rest ang peace to your mind and heart 
I’ve been there and my son is turning 6 on November and they he knows he’s dad. I will pray for you sister. jesus Loves you! 
keep on praying!
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Children need consistency so I don’t think you’re wrong in telling him to stay away, however learn from someone who’s been there, get a lawyer now and get full custody with visitation at your discretion. Kids grow up and have a natural desire to know who their other parent is. The last thing you want is your kid yo become a teen and go find him because you’ll have a hell of a time getting him back. Also I’m all for blended families, step parents and what not cause that’s actually the only experience I really have however people really need to stop saying that their children call step dad daddy because thats all they know. Your child calls him daddy because that’s what you have him call him. Children dont know what moms, dads, siblings, aunts, uncles or grandparents are, we teach them that. You taught your child that so please stop with that. Its nobody’s business if that’s what you chose to teach your child so stop trying to sugar coat it
Dont block him, make inform him children have feelings and letting them down emotionally damages them.
I wldnt ever prevent their biological parent the right to see the child even if its supervised.
The child has the right to say who is in their lives.
My kids dad is inconsistent and has other issues. Never have i stopped him having supervised visit with his children because they are his.
Now my kids are older they oftern tell him they aint interested and dont wanna go see him thats their choice and its respected by both sides.
You need to not block him but keep.logs of failed appointments and keep evidence from.him of missed appointments ect
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No get rid of the deadbeat and regardless if he’s in your child’s life .Get back onto the courts regarding childsupport.
Get legal counsel, make you dot all I cross all tees.
Not in the wrong at all. I just did the same thing with my BD. Left cuz he cheated and took our 6mo to another state with me. We since have a new man in our lives that has been more father to her than her biological. We gave her biodad a chance and let him move into the state and in with us, to help him get on his feet and be part of our daughter’s life, but he pissed it away to chase after another female in another state just a month later. We agreed before he left, that in exchange for signing over his rights, I would relieve him of his child support and he could never come back. I wasn’t having him teach her that she wasn’t worth his full attention and ruin her self esteem. She has a fantastic step father and that’s all she needs. Family isn’t always blood.
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My son’s Bio was never in the picture, when my son was 2 years old I met my husband and that is the only dad he has ever known. He will be 15 this year and their bond is unbreakable.
His Bio dad is 80k in the hole and has NEVER done anything for him. We had his rights terminated a few years back and the adoption/name change process going.
Don’t ever feel guilty or you’re wrong for making your child’s life and your life better
Let the father get a lawyer & do it that way. It’s not fair to constantly let your child down, although at 2 your son probably doesn’t really know what’s going on as he gets older he will & it will have huge impact on him. This is speaking from experience with my 10 year old twin boys. If the father really wants to be a part of his sons life he can fight for it & make the effort, you have been accomodating and tried making it work out of court.
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I think you need to keep records of his lack of commitment when he makes promises he doesn’t keep and ignore the fact that he isn’t paying child support, so it doesn’t eat away at you. At a later stage, when your boy wants to know his birth father, keep your negatives to yourself, and see if his father has a better attitude towards him.