You deserve happiness. Apparently he can’t give you that. Why does he stay?
Do you! Get the hell out 0f there and enjoy the single life and God bless you!
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A leopard doesn’t change his spots. He wants his cake and eat it, too. Don’t give in. Move on.
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Nope you are not wrong. It is what it is.
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He’s trying until you decide to stay and he’ll go back to treating you like shit. Trust me you’re better than that. Your kids are grown and would support you if need be. Stay strong and do something that makes you happy. I know that habit is stronger than love, but you need to do what makes you happy even if ots scary.
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Go live the life you deserve! Your not a prisoner you done the hard yard and put everyone first now it’s time too spread your wings!! The guilt will always try to make you stay where you don’t belong. But girl there’s a whole world out there that’s calling your name xo
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You deserve to be happy. Remember that.
You’ve wasted enough of your life. Start moving forward and live your best life
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By Felicia get to steppin
Oh the love bombing… until everything calms down then…Bam! Back to how it was 
its a little too late to be pulling out the stops, he csnt just make up for years of treating you like trash… you’ve seen the real him. Live for you!
Best thing you can you can do for your self. I did it at 62 and have not regretted it. If you have a job so you can support yourself. Go. You are not wrong in doing it. I was wrong for not doing it sooner. It is scary but I went where I had family and knew he would not follow me.
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Dollar short n a day late …30 years invested…Single and happy made myself a priority.
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Don’t waste anymore time. Once you give in, he will go right back to treating you badly. Go find your happiness alone or with someone else. God bless you!
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I’m sorry you are going through this… But don’t fall for it, he will get you where he wants you and it will start all over again. I am willing to bet you feel like you wasted years on him… That’s how I felt, I was in a 10 yr marriage and it was good at first but then it wasn’t. Do what makes YOU happy, don’t make a decision because of guilt.
You’re not wrong at all. He’s only trying because he knows that if you leave he won’t have anyone to do everything for him anymore.
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You can feel however you want to feel . however if you have any doubts you can always try marriage counseling. Maybe it’s not to late. If anything you will get some affirmation about your feelings and know what you want to do for sure.
I think every woman on this page just needs to be single and stop complaining that someone ELSE isn’t making you happy. Sounds like a lot of people that are unhappy with THEMSELVES.
Stop blaming others for your problems.
You just do you, you can’t make others happy when you ain’t happy yourself, chin up it gets easier 
Nope. He is only trying because you said you was leaving.
It’s true every little complaint every Little dig Builds up. It erodes your love one thing after anotherUntil there’s nothing left. I know people have let me down and when they have I’ve lost all respect or love.That they will never get back. You’re not wrong He’s done it to himself. Look for someoneThat respects and cares for you And if you start to treat you bad Tell him that’s not going to work
Too little too damn late! Don’t stay outta guilt, don’t waste anymore time on him 
go do you honey x
too late! go and be the best version of yourself!!
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I also want to add that he was abusing you… Not physically, but mentally and emotionally, you are not wrong.
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He’s trying to not be just roommates? For better or worse.
Throw hiM out. And breathe a sign of relief.
Its easy to say leave. But have you worked or been a housewife. Can you support yourself if you leave. And why would you have to be the one to leave? Do you have family or friend who could help you get settled on your own??? Find a way out !!! You can’t trust him and he just isn’t worth spending another day with
You feel how you feel. More than likely he is more concerned about the money he is going to lose. 52 is not that old. Move forward with your life. This is what he wanted.
You need to do YOU.
You need to be happy. You need to experience love and worth. Leave. Leave leave leave.
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Don’t walk run. You are young enough to find a man to treat you like you deserve
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Dude I felt soooo guilty (mine was not as intense) when I left my ex… he was so shit to me for so long and then the minute I threatened to leave him he completely changed, started acting and treating me different…. But by that point it was too late honestly. Like it was to the point of I was getting uncomfortable/disgusted by his acts of niceness because I just DIDNT want them.
At the end of the day, you should do what’s best for you, it doesn’t matter if you break his heart. Remind yourself how many times he’s broken yours and move on sis
I wish you the best. You got this. 
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Wow…36 years is a long time. I’m not sure what I’d do at that point…
You’re not wrong…leave.
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sounds like your just companions, get out while your young enough to enjoy life
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U did your part and u deserve to be happy go on and be happy! Life is to short to be living with so many regrets but 38 yes kids and decades of mental anguish fly mama bird spread your wings
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Life is too short to be unhappy. I know a woman who stayed with a man for 50 years for the sake of the kids and like you he was always putting this woman down and she would suck it up and accept what he did. This man cheated on this woman several times and she just accepted the hurt and continued to take care of this man u til the day he died. Now this woman has freedom to do what she wants and come and go as she pleases. Don’t continue to compromise yourself just to make somebody else happy. You deserve to be happy and to be respected all the time not just because you want to leave.
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He took you for granted for 36 years. You deserve to be loved, appreciated, and happy above all. I left my husband after 6 years, two kids. Best decision ever. It’s hard, but I’d rather struggle and be happy, then kept and miserable.
He’s just comfortable in the situation, and starting over is prob terrifying for him. He’s used to treating you like crap, and prob never thought you’d get to this point. Good for you, for leaving him!
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U deserve bigger and better
No your not wronge if the loves gone it’s gone you can’t make anyone love you they either love you or they don’t.real love don’t say hurtful things or make you feel unattractive to them.you deserve to live happy.you only live once don’t waste your life away being un happy.
I can read the first few sentences and say that it’s time to do what makes you happy
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Sounds like maybe you should have left him a long time ago. Or you could pray for him and ask the good Lord to show you if he is sincere or not
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Life is too short for you to settle. If you truly don’t love him then do what’s right and walk away. There is nothing worse than being in a relationship where your partner truly does not respect or love you. Let him
Go find someone who will give him what he needs and you find what you need as well. Life is too short to live unhappy and make others around you unhappy as well
You’ll know when you’ve had enough!
No your not. I am there with my husband to. I love him but I am not in love with him. we have not been together as husband and wife since 2012 I cannot stand for him to touch me just to give me a hug. and why is because of the cheating he has done. I have seen the messages he has sent to women. I seen where he wrote to one we had a bad fight he left went to a motel for a short time then went ot her house he claimed he slept on the “couch” I call BS… Then the next night I seen where he had texted told her when he was there with her he was in hog heaven I told him to go back to his hog and the heaven she creates because this is hell to him. He needs to go back to his hog heaven and when its not what he thinks it is he is NOT coming back here.
He’s only nice because he got caught, in a few months he’ll be right back to treating you like shit
You are not wrong . leave him and tell him it is to late now .
You only get one life to live. You gave him many many years and he took you for granted. It’s time you make yourself a priority and live the rest of your life the way you deserve. Be happy find someone to love you and to always treat you right.
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No, you’re not wrong. You gave him 36 years to treat the way he is now. He killed the love you had for him… to bad so sad. My ex was devastated when I left, he couldn’t believe it. He had lots of chance to just treat me dignity and respect. Best decision I ever made, I am also 52.
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Leave. You will never be truly happy and his new attitude will not last. It’s time for you and that is NOT selfish-its self care
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Well no really but why did you wait this long?Do you see anyone outside the marriage?sounds like maybe you have.not knocking you for it just wondering why you waited so long. I have been in your shoes just didn’t wait that long and I actually caught her cheating twice and it would be the last time.I also know if you don’t love him anymore you probably waont start back loving him again.I can’t help much but if you need someone to vent to you can hit me up.just to talk.
I say pray about it.
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Leave his sorry ass! It will never change… flowers, dinners, and back again square one. Please set example to your children… not acceptable how he treats you!! You are a body of GOD and set the example to all. NO ABUSE!!
Can’t believe all these people telling you to leave I bet most of them wouldn’t, you have to make up your own mind no one can do that for you
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Sounds like you should have left him decades ago. Really? The bigger question is why have you stayed with him for so long? If you accept being treated like trash, he’ll always treat you like trash.
No your not wrong if you don’t have feelings for him or love him walk away you have wasted 25 years of your life on someone that treated you like crap. And know he wants to make up for it no no no don’t waste any more years unhappy. Live your life be happy with someone else that deserves your love and makes you happy. Dont let him do this to u . You never know how much time we have on earth to be miserable not worth it. He should have never treated you bad.
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Girl no … he treated you bad why o why do you feel guilty for choosing you … no matter what’s he’s doing now
I was married 31 and divorced. My ex husband and I share 2 kids and 4 grandkids. I left because after so many years of being degraded, disrespected, doing everything by myself, I fell out of romantic love and began resenting him. I do love him in a familial way (such as a brother) but by the time I left and he decided he would make up for lost time, I didn’t have it in me. I am now dating a wonderful man who acts like the sun rises and sets in me. My kids and grandkids love him. Life is to short to waste another minute in sadness, resentment and anxiety. Good luck to you and if you need to talk please feel free to message me.
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If your not happy & he treats you like crap you need to leave him. I went through the same thing for 23 yrs. I finally kicked him out & practically raised our 2 kids on my own. I’m so much happier. I got remarried & my hubby treats me like a queen & we have a child too. He’s a very good husband & a very good daddy. He’s helped me with our baby since day one. He treats my kids like his own.
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Leave … definitely not on you!!
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nope you’re not wrong but if it’s possible just move into a separate bedroom for starters
But will you be happy if you stay?
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You don’t love him anymore. There’s your answer. Your children are grown. 
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Life is short go live it and be happy
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Get on to your life. Someone, something is waiting for you.
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You deserve better!! Walk away now, find something that gives you joy. Hell never change. Move forward remember Lot’s wife don’t look back. Your life is waiting for you to claim it. Be bold and have courage you deserve better
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No follow your heart you put in your all for so long with no appreciation or matched love etc. You deserve happiness
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Kick him to the curb. He’ll be back to his tricks in no time. Better yourself and don’t look back
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i would just sleep in separte rooms for now - and also just do things around the home that u feel comfortable with- i’m sure your husband will see that part of home is not clean like it used to be , and also only cook what u want even if he doesn’t like it ! set down strick rules -like if you want me to cook for u again this is what i ask of u - help clean the home / help with laundry / start doing some work around the home outside like mowing the lawn / start cooking meals / if not than all i will be doing is cooking for myself and washing my laundry not yours/ i’ll mow the lawn / if u don’t do any of these things i will be talking to a lawyer counciling first than a lawyer about should we seperate or divorce!
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Let see, he beat you down mentally!!! You were an asset to him, but he knew that and wanted to keep you at his feelings about himself. Am so sorry he messed things up,because you did love him at one time. Yes, pray about this , because the grass is not greener on the other side of the fence.
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You’re not wrong. If the feeling isn’t there it’s not there. He had 20+ years to make things right and now that you’re leaving he’s putting out a last ditch effort. Do you boo. Go be happy
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Same here dump him be happy get on with life don’t waste any more time on him
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Leave him and be happy
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Don’t feel guilty. Life is short and it’s your turn to do what makes you happy.
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If you don’t love him, there is no point in staying. He may be trying to “win” and go back to his old ways after he gets you to stay. Only you can know if it’s truly over. It’s not about what he does at this point-it’s about how you feel.
Someone shouldn’t have to be threatened to be nice to you… I hope you can stop thinking about his feelings and think about yours now.
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Time to find your happiness. Funny how men all of a sudden TRY when we give them the boot. Too late I say. So YOU DO YOU GIRL.
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I’m not here to say yay or nay. What I am gonna say is do what makes the most sense to you. Ultimately, none of our opinions matter. What you feel inside, does. Whatever you choose, do what’s gonna make you happy. And be damned with anybody else’s opinion regarding your choice.
Because opinions are like assholes… everybody’s got one. And most of them stink.
It’s easier to leave now than later, and you deserve better.
Be BRAVE. I promise the future is brighter than you think.
Don’t let fear keep you stuck.
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My mother started again at 52 and is happily married to her second husband of 10 years
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Tell him you just don’t love him anymore and it’s too little too late. Choose happiness…you deserve it.
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He won’t change! This is temporary behavior. Leave and love yourself.
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Think about yourself and move on into a new chapter in your life
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Reread what you just wrote. You stayed with someone for 25+ years who didnt treat you/be there for you like you deserved. You already have your answer. Walk away and love yourself. You deserve everything youve been asking him for. Hes only crying now because hes lost the one person he could always fall back on. Dont be that person for him. You deserve so much more
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Go with your gut feeling don’t look twice go for it you have to feel better about yourself you’re still young you have your life ahead of you you don’t want to live it with fake intense that this man loves you obviously he was having some type of phone affair plus you don’t want your children to see you suffer not feeling good he should have thought about that what if❤️
Slam the door…good luck.
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Leave, take that 401K, Alamony and child support. Life is too damn short.
He’s only being nice now because he doesn’t want you to take him to the cleaners
It’s amazing what we as women can endure 
you deserve happiness. Start living your life for you!
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He’s most likely has been cheating for years. From what you described he shows all the signs
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You don’t love him anymore. You answered your own question right there. Time to call it quits.
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You are describing my ex-husband of 25 years almost exactly. I left in 2013 and it was the BEST decision I ever made. When I told him I was out, he tried to make like he had changed. BS!! A tiger doesn’t change his spots like that. It won’t be easy, but you deserve better!! I was single, found myself and last November I found the love of my life. It can work for you too. Good luck! 
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He had basically 40 years to try. Don’t let him manipulate you into feeling sorry for him now. So what’s best for you and leave him
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Sounds like you should have been done a long time ago. You’re still young enough to enjoy your life, and live it in peace without being ridiculed for everything you do. See a counselor and a lawyer.
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Leave… he’s been cheating for a while… all of those things you said are signs.
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Leave! They always change for like a week tops and go back to their normal self! U don’t love him anymore so I would definitely walk away!
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Leave him you will be much happier by yourself. Truly you will.
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why do you wait so long
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No you’re not wrong. If you were to tell him that you are going to stay he would stop putting the effort in and go right back to treating you like crap. You deserve to be happy.
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Kick the maggot to the curb! I’m sure your kids will understand! Move on and enjoy the rest of your life! He’s not worth it and isn;t gonna change!
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You’re already gone.
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