Your saying your daughter always comes 1st and you will always pick your daughter, yet your on here concerned about your partners behaviour and attitude towards your child and asking if u should leave or give it a other go. Do what you preach…put your daughter 1st and leave!
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Don’t walk away. Grab ur precious little girl and RUN. I’d sure sleep with my baby with one eye open. That woman has no compassion for that little girl and just might want her out of her way. She’s heartless and a control freak!!
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If she is willing to leave your child in a locked car at night. What else is she will to do. Grounds for losing your child I would say. Get out it’s not about her it’s about your child. PERIOD
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“Her way or the highway” is a red flag 
relationships are about COMPROMISE and lots of understanding. She doesn’t sound very understanding and actually sounds very controlling whether you realize it or not. Saying she won’t sleep on the couch without you? shes even more of an adult than you, and she’s being as mature as a 15 year old. Girl. Leaving is the right decision. For you and your baby.
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She’s a complete narcissist! Leave and never contact her again, you don’t need narcissistic trauma and the child doesn’t need that eaither!
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Leave. Your child will always be your first responsibility and this person doesn’t sound like she really cares for your little girl.
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She sounds uncaring and controlling. You have to put your child first, last and always. What if something happened to you -would you want her looking after your precious child? Would she even ‘look after’ her at all?! Don’t waste any more time with her when you could meet someone kind and caring.
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Girl get out of that ASAP!! Your daughter doesn’t need to be there. You need to ensure her safety… you need to get out of this… it is NOT healthy
You aren’t wrong! These are red flags. It will get worse. Unfortunately she will not change. Especially if you stay. Please go! I wish I would have, sooner. And be very careful, she will say and do anything to keep you with her! And that’s not necessarily a good thing.
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For you AND your daughters sake,… I would leave
It’s time to go out on your own, constantly walking on egg shells is no way to live.
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She’s a narcissist and loves to have control over you. My ex was the same way. Leave now before it gets worse. Pick your daughter over your girlfriend always.
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You are being a good mom. This does not sound like a woman who is ready to be/wants to be a parental figure to a child. She’s wrong for wanting to pull you away from your sick child, for her own comfort. She wasn’t thinking about that baby. She’s definitely wrong for wanting to leave the child in the car, thinking that locking the doors and putting the air conditioner on, is the way to do it. 100% somebody would’ve called the cops on you and you would’ve been fighting to keep your child. And if you, as a child’s biological parent, choose to refrain from hitting your child… She should respect that.
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The red flags you speak of are on fire! She’s 31 but acts and sounds like a two year old. It’s time for you to leave. She’s not likely going to change.
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What are you waiting for.Pick your little one up and leave.Parenting hard enough .You are worthy and you are the main parent.Toxic behaviour from your partner ,think about your child.Sounds to me you are reaching for answers you already know.Leave xxx
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I stopped reading after I saw, “I don’t dare say it to her face that I will always pick my daughter over her any day…DUH.”
WHAT!?!? You shouldn’t have to tell her, she should already know. You should never be afraid to tell anyone that your daughter comes first. In fact, it should be clear to everyone, at all times that your daughter is you #1 top priority, and always will be. If your girlfriend thought of her as her own daughter, than she should have zero issues, because your daughter should come first for her as well. It’s a bit ridiculous that a grown 31 year old, feels the need to be right, or to be on the side chosen against a toddler. It seems that you need to take a step back and reevaluate your relationship.
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I wouldn’t want that woman watching my baby!! Red flags they are everywhere! Take your daughter and leave before something happens when your daughter is in her care. I wouldn’t trust her at all!!
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You definitely need to leave but as a side note…one of you can stay with your daughter at home or in the car, instacart is a one person gig
Put your daughter first and leave… I couldn’t be with someone soooo umm… childish in a sense I guess?
You want someone who is going to respect your way of parenting your child.
I’m sorry but your partner just seems to childish herself and also way to selfish.
I always say “if you gotta ask, then you already know the answer “
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I had a terribly similar long term relation with a female which whom I’d actually been best friends with since high school and we dated back then too… bisexual… but anyway when it came down to parenting and discipline alone that is where I drew the line and realized there was no compromise coming from me. I didn’t read your entire post btw bc honestly don’t need to to tell you to end it now & your kid won’t even remember her so that’s a plus. She sounds like a virgo… at the very least a narcissist lol
Watch YouTube videos after searching “narcissist partner”. Sad to say I got to this point before leaving my ex who I clearly long before recognized as being exactly that; a narcissist. The videos really put it all in my face and helped me past trying to reason as to why she treated me certain ways
OMG throw the entire women away😳 massive red flags!!!
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Put your baby first. It only gets worse. She’s only 2 and acting like this then that’s really sad. You don’t owe an adult anything. Not even an explanation. But you owe your daughter EVERYTHING.
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LEAVE !!! You are with a narcissist! It doesn’t get any better ! I waited for 13 long years for my ex husband to change ! Wasted so many years of my life waiting on him to change . THEY DONT CHANGE ! Don’t waste any more of yours !! Anybody that would ever even consider leaving a child in a car by itself definitely has something wrong with them . Please do me a favor and NEVER EVER let her watch your kid !!! You kid doesn’t need to be around anybody like that !!! RUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN NOWWWWWWWW !
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Get advice from a professional. It’s not healthy for you or your daughter
Yes. Major red flags. She’s getting mad at you for not risking losing your child. She is making you choose her over your own child. So many red flags this should be a damn circus. Run. Now. Before she completely ruins you and/or your child.
Walk away now and don’t look back. Sounds like she doesn’t deserve to be a parent and also sounds as if she’s becoming a potential danger for your child.
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I rarely comment on these post but this one I just couldn’t keep my mouth shut. First off you need to tell your girlfriend to her face LOUD and clear that your’e daughter will ALWAYS come first!!! She comes before her, before you, before anyone! Also NEVER leave your baby in the car by herself. If she is going to suggest this she will do it when you aren’t around. So please DO NOT leave your daughter with her under any circumstance. As for spankings she is two! Who spanks a two year old?? SMH! Then she wants you to let the baby sleep by herself while sick is very selfish! Girl you really need to rethink this relationship. Although she says she loves your daughter as her own which I’m sure she does love her but in all honesty do you think if she would have gave birth to her she would do these things? You need to ask yourself this! Also if you are questioning this relationship and the way she treats you and your daughter then I think its time for you to tell her to hit the road! Good luck momma!! You got this!
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You two just don’t go together
Your child will always need you to love nurture and protect her. Your job is to do just that. Maybe you need to be more assertive and clear communicating how you really feel about the situation. Just be aware .
Ummm…is it not a red flag when she said leave her in the car and lock the door it’ll be OK? Sooo how many times has she done that while you weren’t around? That would definitely get my gears turning. Just a side note if you had to ask, your just looking for validation to what you ALREADY KNOW what you should do.
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Leave!
These are all major red red red flags!!!
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Run away and run away FAST! You need to leave this situation asap
Those are serious red flags.
She sounds super toxic I would get out of that for you and your daughter.
You are more mature than your girlfriend!!
Your child, your rules!
Run…fast…and don’t look back!
((((((((((
And let me add…ITS:clap: ILLEGAL:clap: TO:clap: LEAVE:clap:A CHILD:clap:IN:clap: A 
CAR:clap: UNATTENDED:clap:!!!
I have ZERO tolerance for stupidity! I rescue dogs out of hot cars during the hot seasons…I once found a baby girl left alone. I immediately called 911 and requested a manager. The second the mother walked out she was arrested!!
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Girl you need to get away from her she’s obviously toxic and the whole leaving your daughter in the car 
that’s not safe at all what would you do if you left your daughter with her and she took her somewhere and left her in the car and she died?? Hell no I d pack her up and tell her buh bye
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It sounds like she doesn’t care if your daughter lives or dies. Get out now before she is the cause of your child’s death.
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Leave now ur daughter isnt safe around ur gf.
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You pretty much have answered your own questions and u already know the answer deep down inside u just dont want 2 do it. Its your choice.
Take your daughter and run
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SCARLET red flags !
- Put foot down.
- Walk away.
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Very serious red flags. Stand up for yourself, keep your daughter number one and leave!
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Oh my
She shouldn’t be making you chose her over your child at all
And I would have just said it
That your baby comes first
If she doesn’t want to "hear " the baby she can sleep on the couch I would have been right by my baby ehh you shouldn’t ever feel crazy for putting your child befor anyone else
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Leaving your baby in the car is against the law.
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Narcissistic behavior…Run Now!
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That’s awful. Why would you let her treat your daughter that way. Leave her in the car!!! What is she nuts!!! You need to walk away. You let her hit your kid. Really.
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Your child needs should always come first and in my opinion anyone who tells you to leave a small child alone in the car while you go away for any reason is not making a good decision. That could end so bad in many ways, also it’s not legal where I live. Please don’t ever leave her alone in a locked car for any reason.
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Please take your baby girl and leave! 
Byeeeee! Red flags galore! I’d be afraid to leave the child alone with her…
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You are with a narcissist she wants to be above your daughter and will always throw a hissy fit if you put your daughter first. If your daughter is really first then why are you here asking for advice when you know these are major flags. LEAVE!!! 
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Run as fast as u can and do not look back!!! She is a narcissist!!
Get your baby and leave. Narcissistic behavior shown. She’s literally not caring about the well-being of your kid and even trying to make rules to discipline her. YOU have the final word.
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Leave her, because it will get worse.
The question is. Can you and are you able to leave? Do you have somewhere safe to be with your child and or money saved up?
Run! Clearly those are not the characteristics you want your child to learn either. Love yourself and your baby enough to do what’s best for you guys. You will never win or get through to someone with a personality like that. Sometimes we fall in love with the person we think they are capable of being, without accepting all the realities they are showing us. Prayers for courage to step out in faith. 
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She is a narcissist…run now!!!
You need leave that relationship
You need to get out of that relationship
She GOT MAD you didn’t LEAVE YOUR KID IN THE CAR to go shopping! Ffs enough said right there, you need to leave.
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Leave and take your daughter. But tell her shes needs to educate herself on the issues you have talked about.
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No parent would ever leave there child if u was a good one in a car that’s a no no
Idk does she ever travel with your daughter alone…after that comment I would be worried that she may do that when you’re not around🤔 I see red flags for sure however if you wanted to work on it suggest parenting classes for both of you so you can get her on the same page as you
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Inmates they will find yeah I’m sorry but somebody being cruel to my son would be a deal breaker I just
She is mental get rid of her anyone that would want you to leave your child in the car has got a problem she is probably doing it so you will get locked up get rid of that no-good b**** if you stay you deserve it get the baby out of there!! I hope you are reading these comments
The car thing was the end game for me. Does she watch the news??? What if the baby woke up crying and someone heard her??? You would get a neglect charge
Get your daughter and go. You should never spank a child doesn’t matter how old or what they’ve done. Or leave a sick child that’s just wrong specially if she’s a cough and as for leaving her in the car that’s child neglect and you could have lost your daughter if someone had seen. So id leave I know it’s hard but you and your daughter would be safer not there.
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I say show her the highway. She is jealous of your child. Not all of your attention is on her. Bye girl
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Get out!! For the sake of you and your daughter. Run!!! Someone will treat you and your little one with so much love, you won’t believe it.
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Nope it’s time to go before things get any worse. If you stay, things will only continue to get worse and eventually it will start effecting your daughter.
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So many red flags!!! Leaving your child in the car was the deal breaker for me. I’d get out of that relationship yesterday and don’t look back. You’re young and can easily start over. Give yourself some time alone with your child and move forward without her.
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Wow more than some Red Flags… This is not going to work???
Walk the hell away mate.
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She’s a narcissist. Run honey, as fast and as far as you can. Cut ties and call it a day. You and that baby deserve much better.
Re-read the part about leaving your baby in the car while you both go shopping. If that doesn’t make you sick to your stomach I don’t know what will!!. Go. Run. Don’t look back!
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Get out. Choose your daughter.
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If she’s making you feel like YOU’RE the one crazy for not spanking, abandoning your kid, etc. she’s gaslighting you. She is 100% a narcissist and unfortunately they don’t change. You’re raising your daughter right and she has some ideas that, at the very least, are old fashioned and no longer acceptable in most places. You need to get your baby girl and go. It will only get worse as your baby gets older and has more of her own personality showing. Seriously, what the hell happens when she’s old enough to talk back?! You may love your significant other but if you love your daughter AT ALL get out and don’t look back. You could be literally saving her life.
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1st of all she needs to take a big ass step back and understand you are the mother you make the rules and she falls in line. You will never be the bad guy for setting boundaries about the needs for you and your child’s happiness.
She also sounds like a narcissist. You should be able to have open communication with your partner without fear of their response.
You do not want to model that behavior for your children.
If you get caught leaving your child in the car you will go to jail and your daughter will go with someone else. You are her parents and it’s your job to make the best decision for your daughter. She should always come first so I would pack your stuff and say peace out. She obviously does not have your daughter best interest in mind. If you are asking others then you already know the answer to what you need to do
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Definitely red flags. Sounds like she sees kids as competition and has to hold power.
Yeah absolutely red flags, get out ASAP
I STOPPED reading at leaving YOUR daughter inside a car ALONE!!! GET OUT NOW!!! YOUR DAUGHTER IS IN DANGER!!
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Leave!!! you and your daughter deserve more. If she really cared for your daughter when she’s sick she’d stay up all night with her and still go to work tired or not a little sick child would be more important to her than wanting to sleep away from her because she’s ‘losing sleep’. She shouldn’t get hurt over you saying u would chose ur daughter over her that’s common sense
Please leave. One of 2 things will happen, 1) she will change because she loves you and your daughter and make an effort to get you back or 2) she will make no effort showing she never really loved you the way you and your daughter love her. I’d leave if I was in that situation. But its really up to you. And if you don’t agree with smacks, challenge your girlfriend and tell her no, you won’t tolerate violence against your daughter. And even say your daughter. Yes, it might hurt her but she will see you are serious. I do it with my son’s dad all the time. I actually say “my son”. Not “our son”. Cause he knows I’m serious and if he hurts my baby for no reason, he better be prepared for mama bear mode, which he has encountered a few times. And I see emotional abuse when you say she likes to say you chose your daughter over her (what mother doesn’t choose their baby over a partner). She is practically saying “choose me or her?”. And sounds like your partner doesn’t care about your baby at all. Wants to leave a freaking toddler in the car at night! Nah uh. And leaving a sick child alone. Absolutely not. I understand wanting to be close to a sick baby. I wake up at least 12 times a night to check on my son when he’s sick (has his own room and is a toddler himself). Not because he’s crying for me but because I’m scared to leave him in there by himself. But that’s my preference as a mama (even I will admit I’m the definition of helicopter, first-time parent).
Wow Run take your daughter Never look back
The leave her in the car is reason enough to leave for me just saying
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That’s Your Daughter, not hers Red Flags Leave.
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You have options; Leave, now.
One question, WHY are you still there
All Red Flags. Put your foot down walk away. Maybe try fix it but from being separated your child cones first and she sounds needy and toxic and all about you and the child could be at risk with her especially the car part
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Cut your losses. She is not the right fit for you or your daughter.
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If she really treated her as her own she would not have suggested that and two it would not be an issue to loose sleep over a sick child
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You already have the answers you seek… you really need to think do I want my daughter to think this is normal and okay type behavior to accept from females or males… you have to teach your daughter to be strong and make difficult decisions… Good luck!!!
Girl run before your daughter really gets hurt. She sounds psychotic
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Never let someone lay a hand on your child. Your the parent. Act like it. This person is not a good person to have a child around. Children come first. No matter what
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Leave! There is to many red flags. The major red flag is where she wanted to leave a child in a car by herself!!!
Leave and don’t ever go back.
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Narrcisim at its finest ! I was half way through at reading this post and all I could think was Leave ! Red flags left and right
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You and your daughter need to leave now!
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If it were me… I’d leave. Wouldn’t need to ask a bunch of strangers… your asking us all because you already know you should leave, and want to hear others say it as well. This stems from being told your overacting all the time, which makes you question yourself… which is a form of abuse also.
I was in an abusive marriage for 6 years before I left in which the verbal frustration then turned to physical… its time to leave… because what your experiencing is definitely a HUGE red flag.
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