I need some advice on a very close family member. They live in Illinois if anyone would be familiar with the laws there. He has a daughter that is 13 that technically isn’t his. He signed the birth certificate though and has been the dad since this child was about 6-7 months old. The actual father has three other children by the same mother, who is all older and has never paid child support. He has recently finally gotten a job and been caught and is now saying he is going order a paternity test on the 4th child, which is his, and quite a few people know this, but the 13-year-old child doesn’t. We all feel that this would crush this child. Plus the fact he’s going to be paying child support for four kids instead of 3. But he doesn’t seem to care. He never cared before. But I think he’s doing it to be spiteful. Just to cause a problem. Can he legally order a paternity test on this child?
Yes but this could be fought if proven that he has known for over 2 years and didn’t do anything about it.
Yes, especially if he will have to pay child support for that child.
Not without a family court petition to re-open paternity or through a divorce action.
He can do a paternity test on his own and the courts can order it also! Whatever the “real” reason for doing so is not the issue, it is used to prove paternity or not. This is why I strongly suggest that women get to know the men before having babies, they don’t keep a boy/man, and the woman gets stuck raising this kid alone. It’s not fair the kids who are born into these situations and people need to think before just having sex of sex’s sake.
Yes he can BUT if he signed bc then he took financial responsibly to that child.! So he may have to pay anyways.
Good luck and i hope that he will change his mind for the child sake…
Yes he can definitely order a paternity test specially if it’s child support it has to be done no matter what
Yes but the mother can go for abandonment
Yes… And you would have to find the real dad…
The daughter has a right to know.
I understand thet this may not be the way you want the child to find out but she is 13 and she has a right to know who her real father is.
Consult a lawyer not Facebook
Yes 100% everyone deserves a right to know if there going to be a parent why anyone would want to withhold information like that is sick to me
Yes he legally can especially if paying child support. And she should know. If the daughter finds out down the road and it was kept a secret there will be a ton of drama and hurt.
Tell the kid the truth before he does. And he will. If he is asking for a paternity test it just means he wants the truth to come out. Better if it comes from mama.
Are you saying the biological dad DID NOT sign the stepdad did? If THAT’S the case then NO legally he’s not recognized as her father and it would take a court order for him to be able to do so.
I believe either parent can request a paternity test, especially if there is an issue of child support. At least that’s how it works here in Virginia. My best advice is schedule a consultation with a good family attorney. Most attorneys will give you a 30 min consult for free. You could also research it on the internet. For peace of mind, Id see an attorney. What about the child? If he is the father, he will be awarded some type of visitation. How are you going to explain to her that she has been lied to all this time? I think you said she was thirteen? Puberty is the worst possible time for this kind of upset. Becoming a teenager is alot like temporary insanity. Maybe you should seek the advice of a family therapist about the best way to transition her into this new dynamic? Good luck, you have a tough time ahead. Ultimately doing what’s right for your child will always be the right answer.
Captain Dipshit has known about this child for years and has done nothing about it. No child support, no visits, no contact whatsoever which is considered abandonment in the eyes of the courts. You can fight this easily and win. He can ask for the paternity test all he wants but he really doesn’t have a leg to stand on. There is no custody order in place, there is no child support being paid, there has been zero contact between said child and Captain Dipshit. He can blow it out of his ass and I’m pretty sure that the courts will laugh in his face and tell him the same thing.
Ignore him. Block Captain Dipshit, his gf/ wife, friends and his family members on all forms of social media, your phone, and email. DO NOT UNBLOCK HIM!!!
Let the school, church, daycare, etc know that no one other than the people you give the ok to are allowed to contact, visit, and/or pick up your child and to notify you IMMEDIATELY if that happens.
Trust me on this. I have a Captain Dipshit Fucktard myself.
I would think that he would have to get a count order. Legally he’s just some dude claiming to be the father. Someone else signed the birth certificate.
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First the answer is absolutely he can legally order a paternity test. Second, as a child myself I was lied to about my biological father’s identity and told my stepfather was my real father. What was life shattering was the lie, not that my real father was a jerk (which he was). Shook my entire concept of the world. Someone needs to sit that girl down and gently explain the truth to her. Be prepared because counseling will most likely be in order. Lies like that are wrong. A father doesn’t have to be biological to be a dad to a child, but a lie like that is DEVASTATING. She has and always has had the right to know.
What a simp, don’t put this shit on internet please
It’s tricky. But having the non-bio dad sign helps. He is legally her father, and you should talk to an attorney. There might be a work around in the law since paternity was never established for the bio dad. If the non-bio father ADOPTS the child, that’s more secure legally. Normally you’d have to get the bio-father to relinquish his rights first, but if his paternity was never established and legally the non bio dad has been declared the legal father, that might change things. Talk to a laywer. ASAP. Once the bio dad gets the ball rolling, your options become limited. Do what’s best for your child. That girl comes first and foremost. Speak to a lawyer to find out in detail what your options are.
It’s called manipulation. Tell her or stop court proceeding. Is it worth it since he probably won’t pay?
Yes he has the right! And the child has a right to know they’re real father regardless how YOU feel!!
In West Virginia no, you can’t. If you assume responsibilities of a child and sign the birth certificate, and want to continue the responsibility of that child they will not order a paternity test… if you do not attest that child is yours there will be no question… At least here it is.
If you want child support the burden of proof falls on you. I think.
He can request a DNA. It’s his proof wether the child is his or not. Why pay for a child that isn’t yours. I’m not saying it is or not . I don’t know. It’s for the best . That way no one has dought.
No not if you dont go
In any state, he can request the paternity test at any time.
Yes he can!
That 13yo needs to know the truth. Don’t let her grow up not knowing. Once she’s 18, all he has to do is approach her in the street! Don’t lie to her!
Yes unfortunately he can and in some states he wont pay even on certificate because the child isn’t biologically his.
If the people on the birth certificate arent requesting it and he isnt requesting custody it most likely wont happen
Im from MN and this is how it works here - He can get it court ordered since he would be paying child support. So a DNA test would have to be done. If she refused to bring the child in for testing, the mom would be held in contempt of court and have a warrant for her arrest. The only way around this is if the mom and bio father came to an agreement where he would owe nothing in child support ever as long as he signs over his rights. Then the child would never find out.
Best of luck!
Yes!!! If there is a question of whether the child is theirs or not they can petition. My ex husband did after seeing the little girl and her mom saying she was someone else’s!
Yes he can. And she should know the truth. It will be hard to deal with but never make a kid feel like it’s their fault for not having a relationship with a parent.
Yes he can. Maybe it is time to tell the child.
He can take the mother to court and request a paternity test.
If it’s not his, then he shouldn’t have to pay. And yes, he can request a DNA test.
Tell the child. They deserve the truth.
Of course he can. Look yeah hes been absent but the child deserves to know the truth. Now that shes 13, probably not gonna go over good, but best it comes from her mother then a judge allowing visitation with a man shes never met. This happened to a friends sister. She was lied to until she was 16, then she found out through a letter. Shes been a mess ever since and shes now in her 30s…
Of course he can. Anyone can order a paternity test for a child they believe is theirs or to contest a child they don’t think is theirs
He can but Even if the actual father really is the father the step father who signed the BC is still her father Legally
He can especially if he goes to start a child support case .
Legally hes the bio dad , dont lie to a child. Explain your dad is the one who stepped up this is just a biological contributor.
Wait why is she hitting him for child support on a kid that isn’t his? Or did I read that wrong?
Call juvenile court in your county ,they can give you answers.
In some states if the child is born in wed lock they only have a year to contest but the mother and father have to be married for this to matter
He’s not just going to pay support, he’s likely going to have to pay back support.
Spiteful or not he wants to hes going to
And he signed birth certificate
Hes well and able to see her
Ur bf will always be her dad
Let him spend his checks on child support…that’s on him
But regardless of paternity
Test
All he actually has to do is
Process a custody and parenting time
And he can start seeing his daughter and pay
Some courts still wont allow visitation if the child has only had a relationship with the step parent in some states they have rights too… just got to look into it. At the child’s age she may get a say so
Why has the child not been told is the real question? I get wanting that person to be the FATHER but the child should’ve been told about the bio dad long ago before now. Not telling her is probably going to be ur biggest reason she’s upset now.
If he is on the birth cert he is the legal dad
He can file, but generally speaking, once someone signs the birth certificate, it’s pretty hard to contest. Especially legit 13 yrs l8r.
Yes…and the child deserves to know who their father is.
The child needs to know the truth and will be very pissed when they eventually learn the truth if it is withheld from them
Yes he can and will more than likely be granted it as well. She should also know the truth.
Of course he can. Why shouldn’t he be able to?
The child has a right to know and they are old enough to understand. If the father wants to be in his childs life let him. There is nothing wrong with having 2 father figures…means more love for the child.
Let me say this it will devastate that 13 yr old! My sister found out at that age that the man who raised us wasnt our biological father when my mom and him got divorced and she wanted to live with him! It literally tore my mom and sisters relationship apart. Since 20 yrs later they still arent close! So dont say that child needs to know the truth! Her “father” has apparently been a wonderful father to her! DNA does NOT make a dad! SMH!
He’s entitled to the test.
Everyone needs to go ahead and do a 23 and Me so y’all don’t marry your cousin or sibling by accident.
I would definitely check into state laws. They wouldn’t give him a paternity test here. If someone is already on the birth certificate and assumed responsibility for the child they are not going to interfere after 11 years. Wisconsin wouldn’t help him.
Yes. I’ve gone through family courts in Illinois…
Since he’s on the bc I don’t think sperm donor can do anything.
The kid is a victim here and he could bring up whatever he wants but he willingly signed paternity and waited a long time so the courts won’t care at all. Even if they Grant him a test, he’s the legal father
I don’t understand how bf was able to sign the vap paperwork and be added to the birth certificate at the hospital but only started raising the child months later
Also if the bio dad is allowed to establish paternity through the courts mom and bf can get in trouble for fraud
Why even bother you will just crush that child and do irreprehensive damage. Let things be before destroying their life.
From experience tell the child…then it’s her choice. Also in the eyes of the law…the father on her certificate is her father! My husband adopted his daughter this way and when she was 5 the mom claimed she was going to take my husbands rights. But the judge straight up said he is the dad. Blood or not.
Legally yes … But he gonna dig himself a hole
Courts aren’t completely without caring. The 13 yr old thinks your friend is her dad, right? Friend has been paying all along right? The courts may want him to repay you. That wld be fun. However, in all aspects, you have been her father, have a relationship a o in the best interest of the child, you are her father. The other guy is a sperm donor.not to mention an ass. This won’t be lost on the court. See if you can get a court advocate to help the process.
He can but he will be worse off because the child’s mom can request back payment for 13 years of child support.
Why try to get child support if you don’t want to let the father have any contact?
If he signed the birth certificate, it wont Matter. 
Yes he can.One can’t ask for a man’s money and not expect a DNA test to be done especially after 13 years. Depending on the state if the DNA proves child to be his biological child then the judge can order birth certificate to be changed to read the real father. It isn’t easy but possible.
A paternity test can be requested. You need to tell the child who is her real father is and explain the situation. A paternity test is very simple, it’s just a mouth swab. And if he is being sued for child support and etc. he can have a paternity test ordered.
If they’re married, no. If not, possibly
- Child has a right to know the truth & get a medical history of her sperm donor, plus why this info was withheld.
- Bio dad has never paid child support for any of his grown or nearly-grown kids, but is likely to have wage garnishment for 3 or 4 kids now he finally has a job. What is the likelihood of him keeping that job? If they don’t take it out of his wages, I’m guessing he’ll never pay.
- If he owes so much in back child support he might have to go to jail (again, check laws in IL).
- Yes, family should have told daughter the truth, but better late than never. She will be mad but maybe get over it with lots of love and explanations, maybe therapy. If she doesn’t find out until she’s grown, she could be really messed up, wonder what else the parents kept from her & if she can ever trust what they say.
- Do the parents want your advice/input? I get that you care deeply about the girl, but you may come across as just a busybody that will get blamed (rightly or wrongly) for any fallout.
Wait are they requesting money from the bio? No, you can’t do that. If you do then they’ll order a paternity test
In Oklahoma. If u have been providing for the child (claiming on taxes and everything) Statue of limitation is 2 years. He would be her father in the courts eyes. Judge would throw it out. He’d have to pay child support.
If your friend is in Chicago I know a great later that is not crazy expensive and is very fair this really should be advised by a really professional. I do know he would have to pay 14 years off child support and so manny more things how ever that is not even so important right now is kid well being . Feel free to have your friend msg privately i bee more to help been i. Similar situation
Why does he have to pay child support if another man signed the birth certificate?. But yeah he can order a paternity test to be done.
He could possibly request it, but it’s up to the judge to order it.
I personally think the child is old enough to know the truth and should be brought in the loop on this one, as she could be forced visitation via court order also. Better to find out from her mom and dad, than a judge.
Legally in Illinois yes he can. If there is going to be child support especially they will order a paternity test if he claims he is or is not the father.
My sons dad took my son to a clinic without my permission and had one done. So id say yeah he can
When I was almost an adult my mother told me that my dad wasn’t my dad it was another man and I had a whole other family out there of siblings etc. Before I could process it and request any actual testing to be done the man she claims was my father died. The man who is on my birth certificate is a great dad and he’ll always be my father. But the fact that there is any chance it was someone else and she waited until it was to late for me to even meet the man really makes me mad.
The kid is 13. The mom screwed up and she needs to fix it. If there is a chance another man is her father the the mother should encourage the testing and the start of a relationship. It’s past time. Every child deserves to know where they came from. They deserve to know their siblings and etc.
He can 100% petition the courts to do a DNA test. It’s his right to see his child.
13 is old enough to understand that being blood doesn’t make you a parent, being there makes you a parent. I would tell that child before the courts or father does
in illinois if she is married to the guy on the birth record then no they wont honor a req for dna test unless the mother agrees . if they are not married and the bio father is going to pay support yes he can ask for dna test the court has the final say but he will more than likely win if he is making an effort to pay for all the kids involved
Well duh these days u can go to the drug store and buy one hell u can order one from Amazon. Maybe this guy changed and just wants HIS child to know who he is and try to build a relationship with HIS child… Y’all should have never lied to the poor kid to begin with. Even if the bio dad is a pos the child still deserves to know the truth.
So funny story. No judge will give him that paternity test because he signed the birth certificate. It’s called a poor mans adoption. My step daughters boyfriend tried the same thing. The judge flat out told him by signing that birth certificate he adopted that child and now that child is his responsibility. Sorry. Sounds like he’s a piece of shit.
They shouldnt have lied, tell the kid so they dont find out the hard way, he can order a paternity test
My gawwdddd!!! This is messy…do the other 3 children see the father? So this whole time this baby thought she was the only one that had a different father? I do not see the point in any of it…however it may make it a lil easier for the girl to accept since its her siblings father too…just sad…Yes he can get a dna test smh
The advice i have comes from finding out later in life (around 13 as well) I did not share the same blood as my FATHER. The hurt from the deception will be outweighed by the love and support he gave her thru out her life. If the man who impregnated her mother is getting (a new job, reaching out to a child)his life together trying to keep her away will only further the damage when she finds out. Which if for medical or dna testing or a 3rd party will only hurt her worse. If he doesn’t step up its not their fault the kid will have her parents to uplift and love her thru it. Also 13 is a big age 15 -17 will be harder. Best to do it yall 3 on your family terms than have court or someone else telling her besides them. Hope all goes well.
Sadly he can also try to sue mom and the man who signed for letting him sign knowing he wasnt dad.
Lying to the children is on them yes he can and it won’t look good on the mom for lying what ever that reason
He can get a test
May be being all talk
But if it is his child… He does have rights. And he’ll be paying a lot of back support
How dare that mother lie to that poor child for that long. How incredibly stupid of her!! And you for knowing and not saying anything. Dumb decision.
That child is going to hate everyone who lied for that long. 
In ohio if one man sign the birth certificate the other man can’t order a dna
Legally he can. Some states the mother has to agree. But he can ask the judge & the judge will agree.
Yes he can. And the child should know the truth anyway. Just because he was responsible for the child while with the mother doesn’t make it okay to force him to support another mans child.
This doesn’t help and might sound judgy but we don’t always pay for our choices sometimes our children do. Find a therapist. Let the child be tested and just give her support. You can’t always get away with this type of stuff sometimes it catches up. And yes he can order a paternity test by starting the child support process.