For starters I would look into taking online classes for your ged, that will help a lot give you a higher chance of a callback. Obviously if he didn’t like his job he shouldn’t stay, but the way he went about was wrong. He should’ve talked to you about it first then tried to land another job & give 2 weeks into the current one. If you’re already thinking about ending the relationship, you need to focus on you so you can support your kids if that happens. Get your ged, find a job and go from there. Apply for assistance & healthcare if you need too. See about staying with a family member or friend to help you save money. You can do it, just take a deep breath!
as a stay at home mom myself, I get that you’re stressing right now and probably don’t mean to sound spoiled…but to be a stay at home mom a lot of sacrifices have to be made (in most people’s cases)…I’d say trade the vehicles in for cheaper ones (you can get a dependable car for $10,000), sell the camper, and maybe talk to him and see if he’s willing to give you a little time to get your GED before he quits his job so you’ll have an easier time finding yourself one, or get a weekend job when he’s free? after a few weekends alone with the kids he may change his mind and want you to be home all the time🤷🏼‍♀️ I work one night a week at a restaurant and bring home at least $300 in that one night and it gives me spending money and money for groceries AND gets me out of the house and gives my husband a night with just him and my son and works great for us.
I would also really
Like to emphasize getting your GED… and maybe going to college online part time and by the time your kiddos are all in school, you can get a good Job doing something you enjoy that fits your family’s schedule/needs.
I’m sorry to say, but to ask your spouse to support you and your children and you don’t want to get a job is ridiculous. Don’t you think he is tired and over worked? He wants to spend time with his children as well and that’s not ok? If he isn’t patient with them where is the disconnect? Do you have different rules than he does and they won’t listen to him? I don’t believe this generation and feeling like they don’t need to work. Not one person should be the sole bread winner, this isn’t the 50’s. Times are tough and two incomes are much needed unless you’re a doctor, lawyer etc. Yes, you would have to get a job if you were alone and a different car so why is it a deal breaker for you now? A marriage takes work and growth. Life has its ups and downs, but truly this seems ridiculous to me. No man, or woman for that matter should have all the weight of supporting a family on their own.
So you’d be willing to get a job if you were single. You’d be willing to give up your car, if you were single. But can’t do the same because it’s not to the benefit of your partner? Only if it was to benefit just you??
Why does him being exhausted and wanting to spend more time with his family get over ruled by your selfishness of not wanting to work!?
Did you only marry him because you thought it’d be an easy ride? That’s not what a partnership is.
You’re not spoiled, you’re selfish.
My thoughts:
He is tired of driving and wants to be home, talk to him into finding a job in your city where he can be way closer.
Return the cars and get cheaper vehicles, get rid of the camper, this should clear off your debt significantly and make finances easier on you guys.
Start studying for your Ged. Try setting a time aside each day to study even if just a little. You can do it!
You guys should consider couples therapy as well!
Stay at home moms will never receive a good report from the opinion of strangers on social media. I know this being one myself, most people have nothing of benefit to say. We know nothing of your family dynamic behind closed doors. It is best to handle these matters with a close trusted friend or family member. Most of the internet and people on it truly do not care how this turns out for you!!!
First I would sell the camper. Get online study and get your GED. Don’t give up and keep applying for jobs and even reapply on the ones you did already. It shows persistence. If you can’t get a job working from home then apply everywhere else if you were a single mom you would not have any other choices. Don’t give up and know your value and by the way beeing a stay at home mom is a job in itself. I hope your situation will get better and don’t ever give up stay strong and go get that GED. Good luck to you.
You can get your GED, go get it (he may have to help you as far as paying for it I think its free in some states not sure I have my diploma) you would have to get a job to help out on bills to help and get your GED, we know you’re fragile, but at the same time if your spouse needs help that is what you do is be there in time of need (for better or for worse), sell the camper, but more importantly get your GED and then go to school for something that interests you at the same time of working a job (of anything as long as ot brings home something to help out)
Yes, he did break his promise and commitment. It’s time to start trying to get a GED anyway you can, and get out.
WoW you are so spoiled & selfish
Get your GED. Never give up your education for anyone! You are responsible for your own life at least. Depend on no one for support.
Contact your local high school or community college they have GED programs. I think at the community college they also have programs to help with daycares and then help you start college afterwards. Don’t depend on him. And why can’t he look into local driving jobs till he finds something he likes? There is a shortage on driver’s even if it’s part time it’s better then him doing nothing. And just keep applying people should be hiring for seasonal help. Give them a call and ask them if they have received your application that way you get their attention.
I don’t necessarily think you mean to come across as spoiled or selfish, but it does read that way. You seem very caught off guard by the change in circumstances. Yes, he made a promise and commitment to you, however, things have changed. A lot has happened within the past couple of years and millions of people have changed their viewpoints on their employment and family dynamic. He’s definitely not alone in that. As a former SAHM, I can understand your worries and concerns. Especially in regards to him not being as patient and watchful. I think that maybe you should look into getting your GED, not just for work purposes in the immediate future, but because it’s something you should want for yourself. If something were to happen to him, or if you end your relationship, you’re going to need to be able to support your family. Getting a part time job isn’t a bad idea. It gives you a bit of an outlet, as well as making a little bit of money. Even if it’s just enough for groceries, it’s better than nothing. I loved being a stay at home mom, and being a lunch lady now, I’m extremely fortunate enough to be able to stay home with my kids during the summer and school vacations. His job seems to have provided a pretty comfortable life for you thus far. At what point does he also get to enjoy his life with you and your kids? A relationship should be equal partnership. You make sacrifices for each other and pick up the slack when the other can’t handle things. Right now he’s telling you that he needs you to meet him half way. He may not be using those exact words, but what he seems to have laid out, are plans to not only work comfortably, but also spend more time as a family. I’m having a difficult time seeing where he’s being the bad guy.
I’m a stay at home mom myself, but if my husband was burnt out on his job and wanted to have relationships with our kids because he overworked and asked me if I would get a job to help out, I most definitely would. He’s your husband, not sugar daddy, it’s a nice promise but shit happens and you need to help your husband.
SMH ish change go get a damn job.
What if he was physically incapable of working?
I worked on the cancer wings for years and it always troubled my to see wives so lost after their spouse loses income ability due to illness
Some swim. Some sink. Every marriage shifts. I am here for my husband and if he needs help then I give up the fancy things and remind him I love him…not the money. Not the things. I am a strong woman. I CHOOSE HIM. Not because he makes me comfortable
He could always be the one who decides he deserves better amd leave. Don’t assume your the only one with Free Agency in this life you guys have built together
My brother died recently. You need grief support. It’s not about the car. You aren’t dealing with your inner growth
I think it’s important to remember there are 2 people’s wants and needs in a relationship. So what if that was the deal, if he’s unhappy?
The concern should be compromise not “stay unhappy so I get what I want” because you are asking him to do what you are not willing to… sacrifice.
Get back to school, get the ball rolling because if you 2 have been separating it might not be long for a real separation and he won’t have to cover what he does now.
Honestly if you are more concerned with what you get over his happiness, sounds like it might be time anyways. Doesn’t sound like love🤷🏻‍♀️
Well someone times things change. My ex husband wasn’t happy at a job. He told me that time after time. (I have no diploma or ged) he was the only one working, I was a sahm. U told him to quit. He did a few different jobs then he went to collage(computer stuff) and started his own tee shirt bis for a whileso he could stay home with our then 2 kids… I ended up getting a 3rd shift job at a local store bakery. No baby sitter. I’d be home with kids in day time, he’d be home at night with them. (I didn’t get a job till my oldest was in school) we sold my car when I didn’t have a job. We had no need for it. Sometimes you gotta think of other people than yourself.
I’m a SAHM during the work hours my husband is gone and then I pull 4-5 hours at a local BK 3-5 nights a week. It’s something for my pocket, my car payment, gas, but keeps me humble. Thankful my husband is the real breadwinner of our family cuz I don’t make enough to support myself and my daughter there but I have a degree for medical assistant I’m not currently using. Always have the fall back option. Yes I get to stay home because I don’t make all the money in my home, but I’m paying for my dues as well. I put myself through school when I was SA and found out I was pregnant because I wanted the best for my child. Some marriages don’t last forever, you don’t want to be caught unprepared. If you went to court tomorrow for custody of your children with your husband also fighting for custody, he is the breadwinner and you don’t have a degree, diploma, anything to back up that you can fully support your kids right now by yourself. Yes it’s hard, yes it’s demanding, but the resources are there to help you. Use those resources. Local DHHR has babysitters through the state that are up to code, no priors, etc and sometimes they’ll work with you on income base but you have to get up and do it on your own. If not for yourself, do it for your kids.
Your man is trying to get you to participate in life with him… who is really falling down on the commitment?
Just because you decided at one point that you would stay home doesn’t meant things can’t change and he forever has to be the one to work. I would work on getting your GED. Like it or not he now doesn’t want to be the only one working. If that’s a deal breaker for you leave and see if you can find someone to take care of you. If you decided one day that you wanted to work and make your own money, get out of the house would that also mean you are breaking your deal. Things change and people change.
As you said, things change. You were both young. He probably gave you those undertakings with the best intentions but he probably had no idea he’d start hating his job. You can’t expect him to do something he hates for the rest of his life because he’ll just become a miserable husband and father. Hope he can find something with the same money otherwise you may have to help. Time to get your education sorted. It’s important for your independence anyway!
baby at 19 … Graduation age is usually 17/18 so did the baby/pregnancy prevent you from graduating?
Why cant you BOTH find a way to work weather it be from home OR work out of home and find a schedule that works for both if you ? Finding opposite schedules or getting sitter for inbetween hrs?
No diploma. Theres still 291187652 jobs
I can see where your coming from. But I can’t. I think you were hoping he would give you a heads up rather then just springing it on you. Ie. He would stay working, 5ell you He wants to get new job, you say okay I need my gr. 12 or ged. He stay working until thats done. When done you look for job and he look for job.
As for sahm I could have been one. I choose not to. Staying home isn’t for everyone. Working long hours aint either
It sounds like you were both young when you started a family and made promises to each other. Life throws curve balls sometimes so you have to figure out how to deal with the unexpected. Its not easy being an adult and raising three kids. You probably will have to help make money because their expenses only get more as they get older. For example, braces, team sports, etc. Have you considered a trade school? Xray technicians, beauticians, etc make a decent income and you guys could trade off on childcare. Set a goal for yourself, and make it happen, one step at a time.
Get the GED first. Then you will have more job options. Get rid of the camper. He can look for a job he likes. Working at a job we hate is awful.
I get what you have said with all this and he should surport you as you cnt just quit your kids and get a job as kids need looking after, but have you tried speaking to him and seeing if hes unhappy in his job? He might be unhappy working the hours he works as a lorry driver as I know they can be horrible hours, and maybe he knows he wont get a good paid job like it but his job could be bringing him down big time, he could be screaming out for help from you, you need to talk to him about it as adults, maybe try saving alot more money first and then sorting things, I think you need to surport your man tbh sell your car to surport him, it’s all about give and take, just talk to him
If he wants to work from home why would you need two cars why not give one up to save money. You can’t just have kids get so far in and decide you don’t want to do it cause your other half wants you to work like that’s just petty and selfish your just as responsible for providing for your family as your partner is. Think you need to both sit down and have a talk and you need to split the effort between you and stop just think about your needs.
I mean if for years he said for you to stay home & care for the kids/cook/clean, you obviously believed it would be like that, and it should, because now he’s backing out of it. If he ever had a doubt in his mind that he may want you to work, he shouldn’t of said that you need to stay home. I wouldn’t leave him, but really try and talk with him and tell him all your feelings about it. But if it seems like he don’t give a shit, then maybe I would leave.
If my fiancé tells me he doesn’t like his job or it’s too much for not enough pay, we talk it out and he quits and stays home with the kids while I work 12s or 16s. I will always listen and support him if he is unhappy and feels like he’s missing out with the kids. He truly wants to be the bread winner while I stay home with the kids but that’s not how life works. STOP being selfish and listen to what your husband is telling you. Go into the nursing field they will hire people without a diploma or GED as a Cna and even put you through schooling for free. If you honestly feel like leaving him because he is unhappy and wants you to work then just go. He deserves someone that will listen to him and not be selfish to his needs and wants 
. Relationships are about compromise and so much more.
I understand how hard it is for both parents to be working while having children at home, childcare isn’t cheap but it’s not impossible to do.
I’ve begged my husband to come home and find a job in town and let me work as well. I don’t see mine for weeks at a time and I’m pregnant with our 4th child and it’s really freaking hard. You should be willing to work together as a team, if he’s miserable doing what he’s doing then you should support the change in a way that both of you can be happy. There are options to get your GED, there are ways for both of you to work and take turns caring for the kids. Have faith in the father of your children that he’s capable of being a dad without you present. The fact you basically don’t trust him to be a dad out of your sight is troubling.
If you leave him your going to be forced to work anyways being a single mom isn’t cheap put your big girl panties on girl in this day and age it takes 2 to run a house hold especially when you don’t have a high school diploma or GED 
Don’t ever sell your car bc you have kids and there will come a situation where you will need it- to take one of the kids to the hospital or to leave your man or something else.
Most people don’t respect or understand a stay at home moms role. However the decision to continue to be a stay at home mom has to made by both parties because there is a lot of sacrifices that are made. It sounds like he’s bailed on that decision. My husband was a truck driver but he only worked as a city driver so he could be home with his family. No matter what get your GED talking from experience. Maybe get a part time job when he is home so he can babysit. Why doesn’t he get rid of his vehicle and get a less expensive car. I understand him not liking his job but when you have a family you suck it up.
No way would I put myself in a situation where I had to solely depend on a man to support me. I know we all like to think our marriages will last forever. when in reality half the time that’s not the case. If you’re willing to leave him, give up your car and go to work. You should be willing to get a job and help support your family. He burned out, and wants to be closer to y’all. He’s trying to get you to see that. At Don’t ever depend on ANYONE to support you it can go south quick and you’re screwed…
Life moves forward all the time, things and feelings change. Your partner may want the chance to get better with the kids, he’s not going to unless he spends that quality time with them. Have you thought about getting a job in a supermarket working evenings maybe? Get you out the house and gets you some experience with working and gives you an income for your car payments ect whatever. Be careful with rushing into being a single mum, it’s hard work constantly, I lovey lil man to bits and wouldn’t change a thing but money is very tight, it’s lonely and stressful worrying about how your going to pay the bills and keep food on the table and find extra for Xmas and birthdays.
I’ve worked while my SO stayed home with kids before. I work now ONLY because I refuse to a.let him carry the whole house on his back and b.to be fully dependent
You sound ridiculous imo
You don’t want to sound like a spoiled brat, but that’s exactly what you do sound like!
He is also a parent! He is fed up with being away from his family so much and has suggested tightening your belts so he can take a lower paying job. But you’re complaining because it’ll mean giving up a £35K car, camper and everything else!
Do you love this man? Or just his wallet?
I’m going to be the bitch … you rely on him way to much … it’s not rocket science to get a part time job in a cafe … ur exspecting everything off hun like u would rather he didn’t mind his own children? U want d car but u don’t want him? U want d life style but u won’t help have it … weather u had a child at 19 or not doesn’t mean u no nothing … have self respect for urself and respect for your partner… share the responsibility the kids and d work load … sounds like u don’t want him but u won’t leave his money… Also seems ur car is more important to u … sorry to be the bitch here … but ur not 100% right u. This
He didn’t break any commitment. He grew up and wanted different respect that and help
Get out of the relationship, sell car n get cheaper use rest to set you n kids up, when you are ready study or work. He can quit his job but even if you both got remote jobs it’s like he wants it all on you he could also sell his car n get cheaper
Sounds like he has a lot of pressure on him to make this work when it’s a partnership. Life changes, you’re young and you’re finding that out right now. Gotta roll with the punches. Study for the GED and then go to adult school to take the test so you can find a job. I’d never ask my SO for working a job that he’s completely miserable at just so I don’t have to work. sell the cars (if it makes financial sense) and when you guys can afford them, buy newer ones
What about his happiness yeah he shouldn’t be nagging but you neex get your diploma and help out. I was stay at home until I seem how stressed my partner was from work paying bills falling asleep at dinner table I went out got my ass a job so he could ease up on his work load.
U may get into the real world and start contributing to the household. Get part time work work round kids don’t be relying on your husband to do it all
Wow …bloke is asking for help and trying to cut costs of 2 cars…all I read then was
Me me me
I personally feel this is so old fashioned…that the man is the main breadwinner…he’s clearly unhappy, so you have to compromise. Can u get a part time work from home job? If you’re both working can u put the babes in childcare a few days a week, or invest in a cleaner to give u relief that way. You both decided to have babies very young, I don’t see why the financial burden is all on him. And, frankly, what’s the problem wirh getting cheaper cars? 35k each is a lot when your currently a single income family.
Come on ppl she said she was fragile sometimes its easier to see a solution from the outside in how about a weekend job and he does mon to fri
May relief some pressure if you can just to talk to each other and listen to each other
Stop relying on your husband to make the money get out there and meet him half way and let him spend that time with the kids whilst your working. He ain’t a ATM
Hmmm.
Sooo, a lot of folks are missing the point here… She’s the only one being asked to sacrifice anything even though they mutually decided to live their current lifestyle.
They have 2 cars and a camper…
Why can’t he get rid of the camper? Or his car?
He’s the one that wants to break their current agreement. He should make the sacrifice.
It’s selfish of him to expect her to be the only one to make changes in order for HIM to have it easier… When the reality is, he wouldn’t be able to do the job he does if he didn’t have her to provide free child care and home cleaning… Tell him that you’ll either get rid of the car OR get a job. But not both. If he needs less payments on top of you getting a job, then he can sacrifice too 
Danny Stephen
With no GED or any work experience it may be hard to find work from home for you so first off work on that GED and get that under your belt. You are never too old to get that,it is so very important. Life changes and in order for things to work then you two must walk beside each other not in front of or behind. In all honesty why don’t you both sell the vehicles and get cheaper ones, the camper should GO, materialistic things mean nothing. It’s time to start contributing to the household even if you feel he has broken his promise because the entire world has changed and it’s time for you too as well. Maybe he needs a break from always being on the road, you can work part time and contribute but this seems more about your needs and not his. First step get that GED so you can make it easier to obtain a job.
Okay so you said “He’s pressuring me to sell my car back to the dealer and get cheaper ones” Ones as in plural so I’m assuming he’s talking about his vehicle too.
First of all you sound selfish as shit. If you actually loved him you’d care about his happiness too but to me it just sounds like all you give a shit about is yourself.
If he’s not happy on the road anymore and wants to come home to y’all then you should do anything it takes to help get him home. Seems to me that he’s done nothing but make you happy for years. Letting you stay home, buying you a 35k car. Giving you everything you want. Maybe you should return the favor and make a compromise.
Seriously? This is so sad. Lol. You’re so young and it shows. First of all, get your damn education. So what if you have the kids half the time most of the time all of the time, whatever… go get your GED or finish graduating, and then pick a career. This is 2021 honey. Your man was just, what, 19 a couple years ago? Your man doesn’t even know who he is yet! Give the fuckin dude a break, you guys were children having children, and you expect your man to be top notch daddy man guy making hella money of the year? No! He didn’t get a chance to figure himself out either. So here you two are, bitching at each other, because you did things ass backward and both don’t have an education for a career. Time to buckle down too, get your GED and start doing something to help your man out, it takes a team to make a relationship work… not just one breadwinner and one stay at home mom.
You sound like a money grabber tbh, using your kids as an excuse for not working, it should be 50/50 child & work wise.
Is he S.O. (Shacking with one day promise of getting married) or Husband (married married)? Either way life is hard trying to live on 1 income unless one comes from a filthy rich family and since I’m not hearing that part I’m just gonna go out on a limb and say neither of you are from that type of family…. We aren’t living in the 50’s where the man is designated as “breadwinner” when you have little ones depending upon you you have to be in a partnership to make that family unit work ie. BOTH have a J.O.B.!!! If you’ve been a stay at home mom I’m sure there has been time in the day to study to get a G.E.D. and not for him but for you, you should always want to better yourself for those little ones looking up to you. As for the car yeah give it back to the lot if that’s even possible without wrecking his credit - you’ve been at home downsizing to 1 vehicle especially if BOTH are at home shouldn’t be a problem nor issue with you. He isn’t bringing home truck driving money anymore so it warrants the change. I under stand your fragile BUT life is going to firm you up and you’ll either flourish and flow with it or falter & fail!!! You have little ones so hoping for the flourish for you 
Omg start chipping in already!
You need a GED regardless…but, money isn’t everything and it sounds like you are trying to live above your guys means and he’s telling u that
I’m sorry did you actually write “he saw the error in his ways” idk what you thought you were getting when you wrote this but you would rather watch your husband work and be miserable then to maybe help out? He’s obviously needing the financial help? And then to boot not only do you not want to get a job but your mad that he wants you to get a cheaper car? Do you pay any of those bills? Marriage is a team and all I I hearing out your mouth is I. You sound like your lazy unmotivated and just don’t want to work. He made a deal with you yes but he prob didn’t realize how hard it would be being away form his kids and being the only income. It sounds like your just lazy and mad.
First I need to know if you are in the USA? Because we are kinda short on truck drivers because of a whole lot of reasons. So drivers aren’t getting paid what they use too either. So financially speaking it may be good to have a little extra money coming in. Then you said to take your car back to the dealership for a cheaper one? So you will still have a car just not a fancy one?
If ur family needs money to survive then go to work and help out. Sounds like you just don’t want to get a job
Ummm so for everyone sayingg go get a job and let him stay home… How is she going to make enough money to support the entire family? No no diploma, no GED, no work history. She’ll NEVER land a job bringing in what he was making as a truck driver. So even if she does go get a job it’s not like he can completely quit working. So now they’re looking at needing daycare… Which isn’t cheap at all … Especially for 2. And now they’re back to square one because it will take her entire paycheck to cover daycare and her money still isn’t contributing to covering bills.
I stayed at home for 13 years. It’s hard. It was hard on me and it was hard on my husband. One time he came home miserable from his job and was going to quit. There was a massive blow up because we literally couldn’t afford for him to quit. I have a diploma and years of mgt experience but I STILL wasn’t going to make enough to cover childcare on 3. I told him, I had no issues with him moving to another company or another field but that he wasn’t going to plunge us into freaking homelessness because he couldn’t be adult enough to secure another job first. And that’s not a “you have to support me cause I said so” thing. Even if he were single his BILLS would dictate that he not be jobless.
If he wants help financially then you can start the process to get your GED so that once the kids are all in school you can go get a job and contribute financially. Y’all are grown ups… Temper tantrums don’t just make things go your way right this second.
Get a job bartending on weekends. Ive done it theres alot of $$in bartending. Also the pet industry will usually hire folks without education if ur good with animals. Not sure how well they pay daycare workers but maybe thats option too
Ummm relationships change over the years, needs, wants change! You have to learn to grow with each other. He needed a change in order to be happy and as a partner you need to support him. As for the rest of your issues, you both need to realize you can’t have it both ways. You either get a paying job to have material objects or you sell items to live a rich life. I say stop living for the things you can buy and start living for the moments you have together as a family. Work towards a GED in your free time. Stop thinking relationships are a contract you sign, things change, people change. He is still providing, you have shelter and food. You have a good life, don’t break it up over money and objects.
He has the right to be there and help raise the kids…quit being a spoiled brat…get a job when he is able to stay home with the kids…situations change…
Sweetie go finish your schooling and put yourself in a position to make choices vs taking whatever life throws at you. If you aren’t married, you aren’t even entitled to his retirement or social security. Not to mention if anything happened to him you wouldn’t even get the spousal support from social security to make up for his income.
I think you need a boost of confidence. I recommend finishing that GED ASAP and then get some job training in a trade. You are also likely to be eligible for some financial aid for some of this.
Do what you have to do so you can choose what you want to do. Once the other 2 kids are in school you may enjoy getting to work outside the home. Good luck little mama. You’re doing your best.
You people are so negative towards her… Say it bloody nicely dont be rude…
Hun don’t give up on the relationship yet try talking to him and say you will try your best in finding a job tell him it does take time…
I would just get a job. One if you guys split up you are going to have to support yourself and two when all the kids are in school I would assume you would get a job anyway. Maybe find something part time and build your resume. You may feel like your husband is breaking an agreement but things and people change, maybe he is burnt out, gotta meet half way.
Put your big girl pants on and get a job. He didn’t sign up to just pay the bills and it’s not fair that you expect that of him, I’m a single mom of three and I work full time to support my kids, get up and get motivated as it seems you aren’t. You put a lot of stress on him making him be the bread winner In the relationship while you didn’t even graduate high school. You need to find some motivation and do more
I’ve been a stay at home mom off and on with my 5 kids, I’ve also worked off and on over the years. I understand the agreement he made, but things change, circumstances change, and you must also adapt. I wasn’t loaded with job experience either, and only had a GED. I’ve held many jobs! Waitressing is always my go too. You need to get your GED, and find something convenient to do and contribute. Curious, how did you survive while you "separated ", what were your long term plans if he didn’t “see the error of his ways” ?
What will you do if he dies? Or becomes disabled and can’t work? I will say, I’m not in full agreeance with him, but if he’s pressing this issue, there may be more to it and you need to take it seriously.
You need to stop worrying about the material things and think long term. If he was to walk away tomorrow and not turn back, what would you do? I think you need to focus on getting your GED so you can get a job that, in the event your relationship ended, you would be able to provide for yourself and your children.
As far as him breaking his commitment, he has a right to want to be around and watch his children grow up. People’s minds change all the time. Being on the road all the time, alone, missing out on special moments with the kids/family takes a toll on people and the amount of money isn’t worth it. Why should the burden of finances fall on him alone? Give the man a break and be a TEAM! Get your GED and find a job if that’s what you need to do to help him (and your family) out.
You can get your GED REMOTELY from home. Then take a 6-8 week course for CNA, Phlebotomist, ekg tech, so many things you can be doing to help yourself, granted these trades do not pay truck driver salaries, but you WILL be able to care for yourself and provide basic needs for your kids. WOW though.
I had my first child at 17, had my second at 21 and my third when I was 25. I got my GED June of this year and I’m 29. It is possible! And it can all be done at home. I also lost my grandpa September this year and started my job at home so I could could till take care of my children. Children doesn’t make it impossible, the only thing stopping you is yourself.
Finish your education for you and the kids
I’d feel very discouraged right now also. If he didn’t want the responsibility of three kids, he should have gotten a vasectomy. Having two kids not in school yet, and expecting you to find a job? These people telling you to get a job aren’t thoroughly reading your full post. If I were you, I would work on getting my GED. He sounds selfish to me tbh. He can’t suck it up another 5 years until your kids are established and at school full days? He wants you to work and get a decent paying job while the kids are there? Or are you going to pay for daycare and use the whole check you make to pay for it? Why do men have to have these things explained to them? I hope you’re not married. He’s putting way too much pressure on you.
21 with 3 kids here! Got with my husband when I was 18! We have a 10 year age difference… he was a truck driver 3 months gone 1 week home!! He wanted to be home more so he found a different position at the same company and they rent out an apartment at no cost to him and he’s home every weekend now! PM if you’re interested and I can see if my husband can get him in as a driver or something else that allows him to make good money or be home more! My husband personally traveled everywhere SO if he doesn’t mind it being based out of Chicago let me know 
Both of you should be working. Then all the stress wouldn’t be just on him. A relationship is about both of you working hard and both of you figuring things out together. It shouldn’t all be on him. No work experience doesn’t matter at all. I’ve worked in a factory since I was 18. 2 kids, yes we’ve always had to do daycare but sometimes that’s what you have to do to make things work. I’m now 30 and still working in a factory while he works in one as well. Sometimes you have to do things you don’t wanna do.
2021 both needs to work work different shift.
Get your GED online. Start online college courses.
Maybe he can help you pay for and study for your GED. And my sister used to work at a daycare and she brought her son with her. I definitely agree that you need a GED and a good income bc he doesn’t seem very reliable and what happens when he stops liking his new job? He’ll just quit and you and your babies will be SOL. 
Also life happens. These won’t be the worst changes.
Don’t let people scare you into thinking the GED exam is too hard. I had multiple adults tell me I’ll never pass and that I should just finish regular high school but I was a teen mom and didn’t want to leave my babies. I later found out that the exam wasn’t that hard and that they actually took your most recent scores from your last exams that you got in high school so I only had to take the English portion of the entire exam.
You should only depend on yourself, if something happens to him to must be able to provide for you and your children. Get your education- finish your GED and get a job.
My story: I got my GED, I had my son when I was 20, my daughter when I was 28 - 2 kids worked my ASS off and through many promotions I now have a 6 figure income career. I now have a 3rd child and I am the breadwinner of my household , my husband stays home but is going back to do something for himself when our little one goes to school next year. You can do this !
So first of all you both should have cheaper cars, second you can work at McDonald’s, Taco Bell Wendy’s, waitressing or bartending,walmart, Goodwill etc without a high school diploma, You need to make time to study for a GED. Things change and he has the right to be home more often to. Tell him he’s gonna have to help you then with the kids. He can learn doctor appointments and sport or whatever. He can learn to cook and clean etc. You got this.
I think you are being kinda selfish. My hubby worked out on the road before and it was hard on him not seeing our kids. He would call extremely upset because he would miss out on important things that our kids did. We had a similar agreement that you have but when he said he wanted to come home I couldn’t say no. I found a job he got a different one and we did swing shifts he did days I did nights and took the same days off to spend time together.
I do agree that if that was your initial agreement then you need to talk about it as things change. But it sounds like for your own well being getting a GED and some work experience wouldn’t be a bad thing.
The bigger commitment you both have is to support each other and the family you made with common goals. Sometimes the “how” changes over time.
Not being harsh, but I’m a firm believer that if a woman loses her husband for any reason, she should have the fortitude and plan to pick up the slack and be able to do it on her own, especially if there are kids involved. I made sure long ago that I could do it by myself if needed, pay the mortgage, take care of my kids, and work full-time too. You need to realize that you can’t do that in your current situation and you need to work to better yourself. Get a job, get an education, and this can all be done with kids. Find a good caregiver for the kids and work to better yourself. And work from home jobs are few and far between. Not sure where the world gets the notion that these magical work at home jobs that pay decently exist without hard work and actually GOING to a place of business to get life experience first. Your kids can use the socialization of daycare prior to starting school. Now you need to pull up your bootstraps and work hard for your family. You watch your kids. Why not work at a daycare? Discounted for your kids and you get job experience too.
I think you have answered your own question within your post. Things change.
I had twins at age 19, and at the time, the father and I agreed that I would stay home with them because it was more practical than me working a full time job just to pay for child care for two children. Again though, things change, and a relationship is all about compromise. I mean, obviously, if you don’t want to be in the relationship anymore, then leave the relationship for that reason. Not because he has asked you to get a job. If you leave, like you said, you would have to support yourself anyway. Sit down together and come up with a plan. It seems like the man is telling you he is unhappy in his career and is asking you to help so that he can make a career change to be happy, which he also deserves. At the same time, without a high school diploma or GED, it’s going to be hard for you to get a job. Have a conversation with him. Make a plan. He needs to keep his job until you can get your GED, once you get your GED, then you can both look for remote positions to work from home. Also make it known to him that if you’re both working, especially from home, that tending to the children and the house will then become a mutual responsibility. If he is willing to compromise, so should you.
You’re kinda being selfish. Maybe he is so stressed with the kids because when he does get to see them it’s his relaxation time away from driving. If he got to see them more who knows what kind of dad/man he could be. Grow up and be a woman who can sustain life if good forbid anything happens to him. Marriage isn’t supposed to me an iron clad contract it’s supposed to be a team. He’s obviously drowning in his job so maybe you could pick up the slack.
Find a SUPPORTIVE mom group to ask for advice moms uncut is not the place to find that always see lots of rude women putting other women down on here very judgmental people some woman can’t put themselves in others shoes good luck mama all the best 
Wow! It wouldnt hurt you to get a job. Yall are equal. Its not just up to him to pay bills.
Life happens, things change. I understand where you’re coming from because I’ve definitely been there in the situation of not working. I also have felt that feeling like hubby lacks attention towards the kids. But it sounds like he just isn’t used to it. He needs more time with the kids probably.
You should at least try to get your GED and really get yourself out there and try and get a job. If you still have trouble with the whole situation after another year, I’d look for help. Look within yourself. Do you have anxiety? Is it hard for you to cope? Maybe trying to see a therapist would help. See how that goes. But do something. Even if it’s getting on disability because you are struggling emotionally, physically idk. Any kind of contribution at this point would probably be helpful.
This is why we don’t rely entirely on anyone for anything because when they stop supporting you - you have nothing. You’re now codependent. You need to become independent because your situation is crumbling fast. Get your education and get yourself a job because if that man ups and leaves, then what?
Shit happens. that “promise” he made- was 2 kids ago. If you had your first kid at 19 why/how did you not finish high school? The classes and test online for your GED is pretty easy to do/get.
And honestly you do sound spoiled and entitled. You know if he’s home more with the kids he would get better with his patience and keeping an eye on them right? So your “reason” for not wanting him home is pretty bogus. You are pretty much ok with him being miserable as long as your happy, staying home and he’s not around. To me it Sounds like separating and child support would be better for him if you are so dead set on not working. You’re not even willing to trade a car for a cheaper one from the same dealer to make payment lower for him. 
Go back to school and get you GED ppl change over the years and so does their life goals. You should always have a back up plan and your own money in case things doesn’t work out for you and your partner. It’s ok to depend on them but don’t let them be your only source of income. He has right to want to stay home and spend time with his kids as well regardless of how you feel about the situation. Support him! You both can work from home, spend more time with the kids, you’ll be helping support yourself, AND you’re getting an education I’m not understanding what about any of that is negative. Sometimes relations have to take a financial struggle and that may include down sizing on a home, or returning your car for a lower payment but that doesn’t mean he hasn’t kept up his commitments to you. Relationships go through that so suck it up and do what’s right!
I agree with ur hushand. He wants to be with his kids more. Sounds like you dont want ur husband around alot so you dont have to deal with him. Go get ur ged and get a job. Plans dont always workout and the plan has changed. Being a truck driver isnt a easy job. Get off your butt and get a job. You can get a job without having a ged.
You both need to get cheaper cars and sell the camper. Both my husband and I have jobs. My car was 15k, his 20k and we have no debt. Learn how to budget. Also, it’s not necessary to get stay at home jobs if you work opposite schedules. Many work from home jobs still require you to get childcare, a lot of people don’t understand that. You are being selfish. Help support your family. Also you had your first kid at 19 so not having at least a high school diploma doesn’t make sense. Get your GED asap
The best thing you can do for your kids is learn to be independent. What happens if he does tomorrow? Finish your GED, show your kids that it’s never to late to finish what you started. I see both sides, you discussed what it would be and at that time a stay at home mom was the option. However being away all the time can take a tole. There are 1000 of us woman who juggle jobs, kids, house work and married or single parenthood. It can be done.
I think you’re being selfish. It sounds to me like you’re not looking for a partner, but someone who will pay bills so you don’t have to work or better yourself. Regardless of whether your husband is the breadwinner or not, you should get your GED because things always can change and you should want to be the best version of you. I also think it’s selfish that you are not supportive of your husband wanting to go down a new career path. Instead, you’d rather see him miserable at a job that he hates. That’s not right at all. I would be all for getting a job to help him become his best version of himself. I’m sorry if this is harsh, but you sound very selfish and entitled to me.