Sorry, you can say you trust your son but your actions and behaviors are saying otherwise. As a social worker I understand the concerns of he said she said but just have a conversation with your son and teach him about setting boundaries. He is 14, try to teach him instead controlling the situation
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Oh ffs ! Your son told you what happened … Be grateful he told you … Sounds like an honest young man … Don’t jump on that honesty - roll with it … Don’t make a huge deal out if it or you’ll lose that trust & honesty all together … Invite her to your place, get to know your sons friend & chaperone on your turf …
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Maam you are being over dramatic right now .At least right now he is being honest to you. You keep on he is going to start sneaking out and lying to you
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When I was 16 I got a bf and married him, now it’s 20 yrs later. He’s almost at that age but not quite yet, still has too much growing up to do. Technically he didn’t lie but he knows your wishes and should have at least called
Totally agree with u !!
I have rarely, if ever, heard stories about girls pressuring boys of that age into sexual activity. (Before the pitch-forks come out I’m not saying it doesn’t happen) but by not meeting this girl, or allowing her in your home, you’re kind of assuming she’s a sl*t that’s going to pressure or give it up to your son? That seems unjustified and a wildly inappropriate and insulting assumption, as a girlmum and a female in general! Maybe if you invited her over and got to know her yourself you could chaperone and actually learn to trust her/them together. It was her parents who ‘lied’ and not her. It’s unlikely the kids even knew the rules you laid out, if this was a conversation you had between the parents and THEY moved the TV down, not the kids.
Also, educate your son, if you’re worried about him being sexually active, that’s a two way thing. This whole thing sounds very belittling. He’s being honest and by the sounds of it, mature and respectful.
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Lord have mercy! You have some BIG serious control issues!!
I have 4….all 17-21….you are WAYYYY overreacting! YIKES
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Jesus Christ. Pull the pole out love, strict parents create sneaky kids and he’s 14!! Let him be a kid and explain things. Why are you worried about your 14 year old touching someone inappropriately anyway?
That’s abit of a 
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That last thing is the first thing I’d worry about too. You don’t know this girl or if she’s petty and so on. Add to that this chick blatantly lied to you. Wow. I’d be livid.
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Your just over reacting Abit too much 
he’s a teen I was doing this at 13. But you sound like an over protective mom. Hope your not like this when he’s 30 lol
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Grow up his 14 not 4
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glad your not my mom! I have 4 kids! Learn to trust or your gonna have bigger issues!
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Damn controlling a lot if he’s gonna have sex they will always find a way but by restricting access to said GF and BF then you are definitely forcing an issue out of a non issue also kudos to the boy he told truth . Have the sex talk and condoms and say if you have kid that’s 20 years they will be with you and you will have to work full time all day everyday no Xbox no ps4 just work school home
Did you say he is 14 or 4?? 
poor lad will only rebel in the end anyway if you let him actually live his life!! Chaperoned to the arcade? To the cinema? Are you his mother or a control freak?
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Jeez I thought I was strict! Personally, I think you may be overdoing it a bit.
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Sounds like you don’t trust your son to make decisions for himself. I would say that’s either because you haven’t raised him right or you are controlling, this is a you problem and your child is going to push you away and rebel hard in the next few years.
This could ruin your relationship with your son and ultimately cause him to make some poor decisions because he feels the need to sneak around on you and not come to you for support.
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Cut the apron strings
You’re son is going to resent you and move out as soon as he turns 18
At least he’s asking to go hang out at her house WHILE HER PARENTS ARE HOME
Most kids would just sneak around
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All I read is… YOU DON’T TRUST YOUR SON!!!
Yes you are allowed to be mad at the gf’s mom, but you can also try and get to know the gf more, invite her over and still keep a eye out.
You know they are in school and if they wanna do something they will!!
They will find a way!!!
Be proud for the fact that he is honest and still telling you things like the basement and TV!!!
If he had bad intentions he would never be that honest,
Please give him more trust, he deserves it.
Invite her over for dinner and a movie, give them space and get to know her.
Most of all appreciate your son’s honesty, don’t turn him into a liar
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Whoever submitted this post is so worried but can’t even spell ‘and’
Spell like an actual person & not an ape.
Absolutely. Every parent has their own set of rules and the other parent should respect your rules for your child. Kids are definitely curious at that age and I understand why you don’t want them left alone. My father was strict and didn’t allow us to go to friends house etc… That didn’t cause me nor my siblings to be wild as someone stated in another comment. I remember classmates at age 14 talking about sexual things they had started doing. Do what you feel is right for you and your family.
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Yeah ur gonna lose his trust in u. Hes gonna not want to talk to you about nothing or even ask atp hes gonna stRt sneaking or ur gonna make him possibly loose a good girl. Hes 14 talk to him trust him n respect him. Maybe having time to get to know her without judgement would be good as well and if thats ur rules and u want them chaperoned like little kids wouldnt it be better them with u then? But in the end ur gonna make her leave and he gonna be pissed at u not her. Cuz u cant learn to break away some. Teach him boundaries respect and safe sex. Theres 14 yr old who arent wanting sex sll the timr or even care about it and eventually he gonna have sex u gonna have to grow up and deal. Its better then him going out doing drugs, drinking alchol shooting he just wants to be with his gf and having time and if talking you about it clearly wants u around. But goodluck cuz ur gonna push him away completely
I have three sons and one daughter. My son is 14. This is an age where they begin finding interest in girls. I educate my son and he is open with me. You have every right to be upset with the parents. But if you continue to drive a wedge between him and other people out of fear, you’ll cause him to rebel and not communicate with you. You need to accept that he has four years to adulthood and allow him to grow up safely and within reason and supervision. I’d rather my son bring a girl to my house where I can monitor them than to flat out say no and they sneak around without supervision.
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I would be upset but, you aren’t allowing her over to your house for you to “chaperone” either. I think you need to have a talk with your son as well and learn to trust him a little more. Talk with the parents and maybe ground him going there for a bit but you keep that up and he’ll find a way to do it anyways so might as well learn to open up a bit
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Cut the umbilical cord, sheesh.
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Omg wayyy over the top he’s 14 not 12 I’m sorry but if you continue to be this restrictive he will figure out ways to deceive you and kids are smart! You need to have trust in your son and teach him the correct way to conduct himself…in 4 years he’s an adult and that’s not far away loosen the reigns
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She shouldn’t go against the rules you have for your son.
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I’d be pissed , 14 can make big mistakes, still a child. I would call her out on it & make it clear you do not approve & not going to be allowing him back there, she can come to your house & be supervised of that’s the case but I wouldn’t be too strict & cut her off altogether. Mine is 17 & many rules are still there. Great grades, no drugs, great friends, works & conducts himself fine. At 14 I wouldn’t want him around a girl alone either, kids grow up too damn fast as it is. Until mine are 18 , my rules & once 18 they can then make “adult” choices. 14 is not a mature age at all. I had tons of freedom at that age & it was not a good thing.
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I’m sorry but I have 2 boys one is also 14 and I know his friends and his gf u need to know her this sounds like ur a little jealous and possessive ur lucky he is still asking for ur permission … u need to fix ur relationship with ur son asap and let him know u want the gf over and u want to meet her and her parents… 
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Don’t lose the war over one battle.
In other words don’t let this incident create a vast divide between you and your son as it becomes a power play for him about HIS rights! He’s 14. He’s too young to understand ramifications of a mistake. So, ask the girl over to your house. Get to know her. And build a strong rapport with your son. You can also reiterate with her Mom your position and expectations. Good luck.
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At least they’re asking… I know many kids wouldn’t even bother so should be greatful they’re willing to be honest with you that their seeing ea other. Being a heliparent now isn’t gonna help for his future girlfriends cause he prob won’t tell you about the rest
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I am having the opposite issue. My 14 year old son’s girlfriend’s mom won’t let her do anything. She’s not even allowed to go to the movies with my son where my husband and I would be there as well. We even offered to take her on a family outing with us, we were going to the local trampoline park and then out to dinner AS A FAMILY and she refused to let her daughter come. I feel so bad for your son and I hope you open your eyes soon and see that you are going to create more issues by being so strict. All you did was basically teach him that next time he needs to lie to you 
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He’s going to be a grown up in FOUR years….how about you start treating him like he’s old enough to make decisions for himself!
I hope you’re not waiting till he’s 18 to treat him like he’s growing up.
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Wow… Do you know what happens to a spring when you hold it down too tightly? The day you let it go, that spring will jump so far away that you might never get it back.
Your kid is a teenager and even if you think you can control him, he’ll find a way to do the things you won’t allow him.
At the risk of being stoned.
Are you perhaps a Jehovah’s Witness? I grew up as one and your level of strictness with the chaperoning is the same as with Jehovah’s Witnesses.
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I can really appreciate what you are saying here. The times have changed … And, not for the better … That’s the Sad Truth, no matter what anyone else says.
The fact that you care enough to have some rules and boundaries is a rarity, as well. I am hoping that you are talking AND explaining the whys and what for’s, as well. That is another lost thing that needs to come back.
Showing Respect, Trust, Honesty and having a good communication skill set is also very important, as well. Good Morals and Values … Those are instilled as they become older.
No matter, as long as you’re not an abusive parent, you are doing what’s right for your family.
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I’d be mad about being lied too. But you gotta let him live a little. For all you know he’s already did things sexually like he’s 14.
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Girls parents lied and caused you to not trust them… fair enough. Once that trust is gone the damage is done. But at 14 you have to start chose your battles because being over strict or controlling WILL teach your kids to be sneaky and cunning. They will learn that the only way to be free is to lie. The key is balance. This is the age where through hard life lessons kids learn how to be adults and they can’t learn the way they are ment to if you don’t let them breath a little. Teenagers need mistakes to understand consequences. They need that experience because just telling them doesn’t teach them to cope with real world issues… If no supervision= teen pregnancy then to much supervision = grown adult children still can’t function in the world. Balance is key mama. And it’s time to get real open about healthy sex talks, as frequently as you can bare. 14 is definitely that age
Iyoh guys its all about your relationship with your son and how open and close you are. This is pushing him away rather than anything else. My son knows my rules and boundaries and knows the consequences of overstepping them.
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I think you have to step back and see why. Why the strict rules. Why the absolute nos. Why’d you go against your own rules by allowing him over. Why’d you trust the parents when it seems like they told you where’d they be. Then take a look at the fact that in 4 years, he will be able to rent his own place, vote, etc etc. is he going to go do a bunch of stuff you never allowed him to because he’s finally not under a thumb or would you rather have discussions now and let him learn little life lessons, so that he doesn’t rebel the second he’s legally allowed to. I understand rules and wanting to protect your kid, but sometimes we have to let go just a bit so they can learn to be responsible and respect the rules on their own.
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Yikes. Think youre overreacting a bit.
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I get your frustration, and they were wrong to go against your wishes. However, you need to loosen the reigns a little and give him a chance to live and breathe. My dad was always very strict with me and I resented him for it for many years and ended up pushing back and causing fights or going around him and doing it anyways. This lead to us having not as strong of a relationship because I didn’t go to him for things over it. If you want your son to trust and respect you, you need to give him trust and respect. Keep the lines of communication open and know your son. That’ll tell you more than you need to know about any situation that he’s in. I get wanting to protect him, I have two boys. But you need to teach him how to protect himself and how to make good decisions on his own.
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You know what’s really, REALLY good birth control? For me and my older kids 14 & 10, it’s the twins I had the twins are two right now and now my 14 year old never wants kids
I’m sorry this happened to you! She’s a really horrible person for doing this to you, but hey, It’s her daughter that’s going to pay the consequences. Yours won’t be the only boy she’s floozy with. Best you can do now is educate your son about sex, sexual allegations, maybe let him babysit someone’s kids, and try to keep them separate as much as possible
You obviously don’t trust your son. Either way, I’d not let him see this girl or her parents because they didn’t respect your wishes.
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You are setting yourself up for a bad outcome. He will just start hiding the truth from you if you act so controling.
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Maybe there’s a camera in the basement so they technically were supervised, but if that were the case she would’ve said so, so nvmd 
My oldest started dating his gf at 14, they’re 15 now. They’re never alone but we have her over all the time so we know they’re never alone. We sat down with him and told him our rules then sat down with her and her parents and laid out our rules and expectations. Her dad instantly trusted us so he drops her off all the time and I get her home before her 10pm curfew. We let them have SPACE but they don’t get privacy together.
TRIGGER
I was date raped at 14 in the guys basement(lost my virginity) I loved and adored his parents so I couldn’t tell them and they went to our church, amazing people, I went home and tried to commit suicide. I later on got back with him out of confusion and after being told I led him on. He was horrible after that so I dumped him again but he tortured me for years.
I am very strict about how my boys must treat a lady respectfully. I’m also strict about them being sexual. Told them when they get to the point where they are thinking about doing more than kissing, we all will have another discussion about birth control, protection and their maturity levels. This girls ready for marriage and kids and he’s still pretending to be Spiderman 80% of the time so I know he’s using us as his excuse. Which I’ll always 100000% allow him to do when he’s uncomfortable with ANYTHING.
My advice is to be open and communicate so your son feels safe being open and communicating with you. If we don’t teach them, they’re go rouge and make a mess.
No you are not wrong for being upset her parents lied to you. However, I think what’s more important than their lie is tft your son DIDN’T lie. You only know the truth bc he chose to tell it to you. He was honest. The absolute best advice I can give you is do not ruin that!! If you never allow him back over there or put a stop to them seeing eachother, you are teaching him (in his 14 year old mind) that he would have been better off had he lied to you as well.
If you don’t want him back over there, maybe rethink your rules and let her come to your house instead.
But the wrong reaction will make him regret being honest with you.
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Sounds like you suck at raising a kid who knows how to be respectful. Wouldn’t be an issue of them hanging out if you raised him right in the first place? Stop projecting on your kid. Everyone is communicating, and magically it still isn’t good enough. JFC, what was the point if you STILL don’t trust your kid?!
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I don’t understand why mostly everyone is against what you are doing with your son?!? I have two daughters and a son. At 14 they are too young to work therefore can’t financially provide for a child. They shouldn’t be having sex! Now, does it happen? Absolutely, but you are doing a great job mama.
Mine wouldn’t be over at his gfs house and my daughters wouldn’t be in the basement with their bfs either. No way in hell.
It’s not the fact I don’t trust them. Kids will do what kids do and not think about the consequences of their actions. I would definitely start having the safe sex talks and have open communication. TRUST is a must. Your son is a teenager. The girls parents completely went against your wishes as his mom and that’s disrespectful. Each parent is different and their parenting styles are also different, but I would NEVER have someone’s child in my home doing something their parents asked them not to do. I would hope if my child was ever at someone’s house my rules would be respected as well.
You need to understand that they are going to do what they are going to do if you put too
Many rules on them they’ll go somewhere else and lie to you anyway. Breath. I have six girls.
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I think your over reacting and wouldn’t you rather they are at each other’s houses than sneaking out and around your back? You need to relax.
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Your should be absolutely livid that the mom lied to you but I’m telling you now once your boy turns 18 or moves out of the… he gonna get buck wild 
he ain’t going to know how to make a decision on his own because you’ve never given him the opportunity to makes a decision. Gook luck mama.
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I’m conflicted, here’s why:
No…the parents should not have lied to you.
No…the kids shouldn’t be unsupervised for too long.
However,
Your son told the truth about where he was and what they did.
They are 14, they can have some privacy privileges BUT not too long because they’re still pretty “young and dumb”
I would establish that I did not appreciate being lied to and try to find a happy medium with what you want, what the gfs parents want and what the kids want/need.
It seems like they’re giving her a little bit of freedom, your son has less freedom and the kids need some freedom but not COMPLETE control of the situation.
My son and his “gf” have been “together” for a few years now. I say “gf” because they’re 11 years old and only going into 6th grade. Would I let them watch a movie in my living room together? Absolutely. Would I let them watch a movie alone in a basement?? At this age, probably…BUT they are not 14+. At 14+…I feel the couch is still a good compromise. A public movie theater is a good choice. A trampoline park is fine. 15/16 is when they can get a little more freedom if they’ve proven to be trustworthy before.
Once they start driving at 16/17…THEN they can have more private dates but I’d still be supervising as much as possible in my home. Like, movies in the basement are fine but no locked doors and I’ll be down periodically to see if you need anything (drinks, snacks, etc)
I cant stop them from having s3ggs but if you tell them the possible ramifications of their actions and educate them it may help them make better choices in the long term.
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I’d be pissed at the Mom, but livid with my son for doing something I explicitly told him not to do. Ultimately he made the decision of going to her house and going to the basement where he knew you didn’t want him at completely unsupervised. You can not control what others do or allow in their house. You have to hold him accountable for his actions because right now he is the only one you can control. Teach him to be better so next time you don’t have to worry about “parents” because you know without a doubt he will do the right thing.
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As a mother of 3 sons, 2 adults and 1 16yrs old and 3 girls, 1 a 16yr(yes twinns) and other 20 oh my my 7 yr old, try and relax, I’ve learned my lesson, and if you trust your son then let him be, this girl hasn’t done anything wrong to you or him , and why say it’s her word against his? Don’t put anything like that in anyones head. Look ima say it straight out, it isn’t gonna matter what girl it is, to you nobody will be good enough for your son, hey I was the same way. My kids all turned out good, nobody pregnant, nobody having babies, everyone finished school and still is in school…
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- Too young! I don’t think you should date until you’re old enough to actually date. hanging out as a group, boys and girls as friends thats it. Since that mother went OUT of her way to lie she and her daughter are out! Almost seems like they’re offering her daughter up.
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I think that you are really over reacting! No I don’t think it’s a good idea for kids that young to be left alone however you seem really up tight about everything! Invite his girlfriend over for dinner, get to know her! The fact that the kids are “allowed” at each others houses is ridiculous! My mother was like this and it caused me to want to lie and do things behind her back. I’m trying to be cautious with my son, yet not be too over bearing and he can talk to me about anything and bring girls around me. My son’s room is literally next to our living room, so if he had a girl over I’d let them go in his room but the door would have to stay open! You can be cautious but don’t be too over bearing or they are both going to sneak off and do things. My point being kids are going to do the things that they arent “allowed” to do so make them be comfortable enough around you and lay down some reasonable rules. I’m 36 now and my mother and I don’t have the relationship that I always wanted. She told me she’d never be my friend, she never has been even now. I believe parents can be parents and friends, depending on the situations. I just don’t want your son to withdraw from you because you are overbearing. Yes, 14 is young, my son is 14 but like I said there’s no harm in the girl going to your house for dinner. If you don’t trust her parents then let her come to your house and you watch them. Your son was honest with you about them watching TV in the basement at least but if you keep acting like this he may change. For your sake I hope he doesnt. Maybe you should go ahead and talk to him about sex or if his dad is around have him do it. I say this because they are starting to teach it earlier in schools these days, he also might hear about it from his friends too. I wanted my son to hear it from his dad so a few months ago his dad talked to him about it. Build trust/friendship and a good parent bond now with your son so he knows that he can always come to you no matter what and feel comfortable talking to you. Like I said, I’m 36 and I can’t/won’t have this relationship with my mother. I wish I could have, I wanted her to accept me all my life but she never has. Don’t be like that… please!
Dont overreact but I’d definitely say something IF she calls again for them to “hang out”. It’s more the fact that she lied and said they had an unfinished basement and they’d be upstairs. My personal opinion from experience is that even thee most trustworthy young teens can and could succumb to hormones. Instead of being suuuper angry - you can be firm but use this as an opportunity to TALK to your son about sex and what that leads to. Save all that stuff for when you’re an adult. You only get so many years to be a kid then it’s gone forever lol.
I know when I was a teenager I had to have my door open when having a boyfriend over. In the basement alone is a recipe for disaster- I know when my son is fourteen there will be a bowl full of condoms in our home because I understand hormones and that I can’t stop it and won’t encourage it but I will make sure he is always safe and prepared. I understand you trying to prevent it and he is too young to fully understand the ramifications of sex. The parents completely disrespected you as a parent and what you feel is best for your child. I do feel like she should be coming to your house and they can hang in his room with an open door.
I’m curious if you are capable of communicating openly, calmly, without blowing up in someone’s face… If so, don’t wait for the other parent to call you, give them a call and communicate kindly about your concerns. Don’t play the waiting game.
Yes, absolutely you are over reacting. Yes, absolutely you are smothering your son. Your example of parenting, as expressed in this post makes it hard for readers to breath. I can only imagine how your son feels. Please seek out proper counseling for your son and self. I sincerely believe that you both will benefit greatly from it.
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Wow. You are a tyrant. Guess what? You now screwed yourself because kiddo is going to become wicked secret, wicked fast.
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Yikes. My parents were like this and I rebelled so hard and we didn’t have any sort of good relationship. You need to loosen up a lot. Your son is going to resent you for taking his childhood
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Complete overreaction. You have to stop being a control demon before your child rebels.
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Stop being so controlling and let the poor kid have some wiggle room its very clear u dont trust ur son maybe some therapy would help u with ur control issues i see a rift later in the future for your behavior towards your son if u raised him right then it shouldnt be a issue
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“Not that I don’t trust my kid”. You CLEARLY don’t trust your kid or your parenting skills. He told you the truth. He didn’t lie or keep secrets. Acting the way that you are WILL cause him to lie and keep secrets. The other parent shouldn’t have lied, that should be where your issue is. Take the issue at hand with the other adult, and handle it with the adult. Your kid did nothing wrong.
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Yikes. You should be the one providing them a safe place to hang out in your own home if you’re so worried and so suspicious of this girl, but you were unwilling from the very beginning, which leads me to believe you were trying to make it difficult for them to date, so that you could make them stop as soon as a mistake was made.
When you are super strict and refuse to work with your kids at all, that is what drives them (and those around them who are sympathetic) to lie and sneak around. I can almost guarantee you that things will only get worse if you remain this rigid and controlling.
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He’s gonna end up doing stuff behind your back. Coming as someone who had unreasonable strict parents. 
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I wouldn’t say a word because you can’t control other people’s actions, only your own. You should just not allow him over there anymore, and just invite the girl to your house so you can supervise in your own home. If she calls back, just tell her no because the last time you found out your son was in a basement alone with their daughter and leave it at that. No sense in getting in a huge argument over it though. Some people are far less strict than others… so you have to watch out for your own!!
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You’re not wrong for being mad at her. But also they are 14 and even if you say NO they will find away.
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You need to chill out. Like a lot. I can’t even begin to understand all that. If your kid can’t survive the zoo how you expect him to survive the jungle. Plus you maybe just might end up pushing him away. He’s 14 give the boy some freedom
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You’re a controlling psycho and he’s gonna end up breaking rules just to spite you. Lighten up.
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Please tell me you’re a troll. No human can actually think this is normal behaviour.
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Good for you momma! I’d be the same way. Everyone hating on you can keep doing just that. You are keeping him safe. Shame on that other mom for disrespecting you like that. I do not get that.
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Okay opinions on strictness, chilling out, and all that mom shaming aside. I think you have a right to be mad that they didn’t to what they told you they would. They knew it made you uncomfortable, promised you it wouldn’t happen yet let it happen. I would not allow my child over to their house anymore. No sense in an argument, if your comfortable with it allow the girl to your house so you can monitor them. Some people are stricter than others, you just gotta do you.
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You’re controlling and that’s so toxic .
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You’re joking right? Literally toxic parenting at its finest but ok.
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First off, why do you automatically go to this girl saying your son did something? Second you are setting yourself up for your son to go to “Jimmys house” many times only to find out he’s been at a girl’s house and got her pregnant because no way could he come ask you about sex and being safe… you would freak and probably not let him out of the house.
So yes, while they should have followed your rules for your kid, or if they couldn’t then they should tell you before hand, you need to loosen the reigns before you never get a truthful word from your child again.
I don’t see anything wrong with hanging out with his girlfriend safe at home with her parents in the house-let me tell you if they wanted to have sex- there is no way u can stop them- they would find a way - all u can do as a parent is teach them how to be safe and respectful and warn them of the dangers and give advice on why it’s best to wait etc and then set them free into the world u can’t wrap him up in cotton wool all his life u will make him resent your over protective ways let him be a teenager and trust u have taught him well.
I don’t agree with your rules, but that is not the point. Yes, this mom didn’t follow through, but if your son knows your rules, which I’m sure he does, it is also on him. If you said not to be alone with the girl, and he knew this, and did it anyway, it is not all this mom’s fault. your son was honest with you though. I’d take that as a blessing in this situation, because if it were me being under this close of a microscope I probably wouldn’t have told my mom anything or would have said what she wanted to hear.
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Loosen up hes gotta have room to grow you either join in with his growth or miss out.
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Loosen up and relax. They’re fine and he’s gonna start going behind your back being sneaky. They’re fine!
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I hate to know what you were doing at 14yrs old. To be thinking like this. Don’t worry to much because of your control issues your son will never come or ask your advice on anything. your issues are gonna make him a pro at hiding things from you. I really hope I’m wrong.
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Relax! Your son is going to stop talking to you about things if you stay this way.
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And this is how they end up being little runaways
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Breathe and let him be a teenager. Please please please don’t be the mother that demonise young girls for being interested in your son. You are always going to be his mother, but you cannot be this possessive over him.
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You sound crazy Like this just gives me the whole vibe of you being the reason why Facebook has these “Monster In Law” groups. This is how it starts.
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This is excessive. You don’t even like them hanging out chaperoned? Wayyyy OTT
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Man yall people are crazy rude with all these comments!!! Wow!!!
Oh dear… you will push your son away and lose him completely.
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You’re gonna make your son sneaky. That’s too much
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Way to go! Instead of building trust with your child you’re so controlling that now they’ll likely do worse and definitely will hide it from you!
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I see like to cockblock your son
Wow, your kids are never going to come to you for anything! Let them live! Guess what! You are not perfect and have made mistakes and so will your children! No one is perfect! Let them live! You are destroying the relationship. They will only go behind your back if you continue to say no. Breathe and let them have a little reins.
I don’t think anyone here agrees with you on this one. Loosen up before your child hates you
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Give your child room to breathe.you even have a problem with them hanging out with parents watching them?,ffs lady you’re gonna make your child hate you if you don’t give him some lean room.he only has 4 more years under your roof then he’s free will to do whatever he wants so you better start acting better. You sound crazy af
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If you never give him room to breathe he’ll stop asking and just start sneaking around
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I would hate you as a mother … ur way to over the top and when he turns on you and wants literally nothing todo with you and you put up a cry me a river post!! Just Remeber this 1 … you will be the reason you will end up sad and alone!
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Chill out !!! let your boy grow up he’s 14 if you don’t he will hate you later on
Honestly, I think it is possible that the other parents truly believe they did exactly what they said they would & maybe you misunderstood what they meant & you just got wires crossed. It sounds to me that they thought the open basement where anyone could come in any moment without them noticing counted as them not being completely unsupervised. They even went to the trouble of bringing the TV from her room down. They didn’t let them watch movies in her room. I think it was an honest misunderstanding and maybe you should just be more clear on what you mean by supervision. People have different views/strictness/levels of what they consider supervision of minors, especially as they get older.
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Your child your rules. I would simply not allow him over there again. Should they ask I would tell them why. Continue to let them hang out at your house.
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You need to relax or your going to push your son into doing a whole lot more than what your worried about. Not to mention he’s soon going to start lying as would any teenager who can’t even have the freedom to sit alone an watch a movie unchaperoned. Do you not recall the awkward ness of a mother an father/ parental figure coming around hanging out 24/7 when you and your friends were younger just chatting being kids. I cant promise you your son will do everything absolutely perfect if you allow him to hang out with this girl alone an have abit of freedom. But I can absolutely 100% guarantee that if you keep up this kind of absurd control not only are the lies going to start. Whatever bond an trust you an your son have together is going to be completely torn apart. As this is just to much not to mention just embarrassing. You say at the end it’s not that you don’t trust him… but to me it seems exactly that way: an I think your fears go a lot deeper than what your letting on an there is more to this situation … maybe you had your own personal experiences as a youth that is now being replicated or trigged by something in this situation. I don’t know but I would think long an hard about this tight leash your holding. He’s only 4 years away from 18 where he’s free to do as he pleases. I can almost guarantee you that if you don’t loosen that leash an give him some freedom… things are going to get rly bad from here an alot of lies an manipulative behavior will occur so your son can simply experience life as clearly he can not confide/trust in you to let him be a kid.
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