You have all the right to be angry. You were lied to and a rule tfst you have in raising your son was broken. Right or wrong in the eyes of others it’s your rule and should be respected no questions asked
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i was bar hopping at 14 
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I would text the mom “thank you for inviting my son over for dinner at your house. However, since you blatantly lied to me about where they would be spending time and who would be with them, that will not happen again. I’m also going to assume that since you think it’s alright to lie to fellow parents, that your daughter has learned that behavior from you. If she wants to come here where they will absolutely be chaperoned, that is one thing. But while I trust my son, I do not trust you” … but I’m also petty and don’t put up with that. Like you said, the girl can say anything, or anything could happen.
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You can’t trust her parents So now if they want to spend time together, they can do it at Your house. Under your supervision.
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Cee Bee Jay RIGHT?!? I can’t believe how many people are ok with this! No wonder there are shows like TeenMom. Good grief.
OP, he’s your son, he’s only 14, and I wouldn’t let him over there anymore either. There’s no need for it.
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I can tell you from experience that parenting out of fear doesn’t do any good for you or your son. When I was around his age, I wasn’t allowed to do anything most kids were (I’m talking having any type of crush on a boy and hanging out of the house, going places with girls I was friends with or a group of friends, nothing) and I was so miserable and started feeling like there was something really wrong with me and couldn’t understand why I couldn’t do basic things all my other friends did. I internalized it as shame and would end up in trouble because I just went and did it anyway. If you’re son hasn’t given you any reason to distrust him, it’d be in his best interest to let go a bit and allow him to make good choices. I know it can be scary but, our job as parents is to teach our kids to make good decisions and allow them to learn from the good choices and mistakes. Most of the time if you do that, they’ll do just fine 
We have zero control over anyone including our kids, we only can control how we act and react.
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At 14 years old they need to be supervised. I would be mad also if the the mother lied to me. You don’t have to agree with my rules but then my kid doesn’t have to go there.
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Your kid is going to be out of your house so young of you keep being such an helicopter mom! Stop it now before you loose him
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I agree that it’s very disrespectful of her parents to blatantly lie to you.. But, if you’re worried about your kid having sex he’s going to do it in the basement or in a car or in a bed or wherever they can do it. Keeping them from each other is going to do nothing but build up anger and resentment towards you. Has he even given you a reason not to trust him? Other than he’s a 14 year old boy?
Congratulations, that’s the last time your son will tell you the truth about something in his life 
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You’re absolutely ridiculous. He must be going through so much. 
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Kids at this age have raging hormones.Condoms break,the pill isn’t 100%,I’m proof of that.So I think 14is too young for them to be alone in a room unsupervised.When you’re that young it literally takes 30 seconds.By the way,my brother got a girl pregnant at 16, her parents made her end the pregnancy.
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Yea I’d be pissed too. He’s 14 !!! I happen to agree with u and wouldn’t let him over there either . They can meet st the mall or restaurant tell him if he’s got so much extra time might wanna get a job so he can do nice things for his girlfriend Instead of bringing her tv to a basement . If he wanna act grown be grown, work too.
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Lighten up or he will be H3ll on wheels these coming years. If you trust him, prove it.
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Stick with your guns mom. Your doing the right thing. It doesn’t matter how much you trust your child you can’t trust the hormones. I have been hearing a crazy amount of 15 year old rapping the opposite sex. Keep your baby safe and keep him from being a parent at 14.
I don’t agree with the mom lying to you but I also don’t agree with you being so controlling of your son. Why do you automatically assume he will do something wrong? Micromanaging your son and choices he will need to make for himself at some point in his life won’t help him make the right choices, instead you risk him acting on resentment and embarrassment. He told you the truth about what he did. Why don’t you trust him?
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You’re absolutely ridiculous. He’s not too young, you’re too controlling. He’ll be climbing out of windows in the middle of the night in no time.
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I would be furious that the mom lied so easily. That is literally showing the kids that this behavior is ok. I would definitely say something & he would not be allowed over there again ever!
I would talk to my son about all of it And explain why I’m upset. You are the parent and it’s your rules. You are their parent not their friend!!!
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A) do you trust that you raised your child to make smart choices and decisions?
He’s 14 and growing up , you should have a serious talk to him about how you feel ( not in anger ) . And explain the reasons you don’t want him there unsupervised, then hear him out . If you have raised him right and he’s mature enough he will understand your feeling but also be able to express his . Secondly he does need to be allowed to grow , and have some freedom , a chance to experience teenage life . If the conversation went well and you trust your child then relax a little .
Also make sure when talking to him have the talk to him on taking precautions,being respectful to a girl , have him be prepared for the future .
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You do you. You are right.2 14 yr Olds should not be left alone, they have ragging hormones, Have no idea what the consequences will be. Oh no no no, my kids did not go to anyone’s house from school ever. They came to my house and I was front and center. Not on my watch. Your the parent, protect your son, no one else is going to.
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This probably isn’t going to be a popular opinion but I’ve learned along the way that the more controlling you are over your kids the more their going to find a way! Especially when it comes to their Bfs or Gfs because most of the time they think they’re in love and if they aren’t allowed to spend time with that person their more likely to sneak out and see them. And while he’s leaving them alone for hours without checking on them isn’t okay, that’s not saying that they can’t be allowed somewhere alone as long as the adults are checking in. But as far as the Gfs parents lying to you, I can understand you being upset about it.
And I also understand what your saying about being worried that something could be said if the teens are left alone together and it’s so sad that we have to worry about things like that but like I said, being so controlling is only going to push him to start lying to you and possibly sneaking out. It’s definitely hard being a parent to teens but sometimes we have to pick and choose our battles. I’ve recently had to have a talk with my 15 year old SS about sex bc he’s talking about it and of course I wanted to tell him to wait but I’m not stupid so I decided it was better to accept that it’s going to happen and at least give him the necessary protection to keep from having an unwanted pregnancy. I also really stressed the idea that No means No regardless and that he had to be careful in every situation!
Wow… Posts like this really bother me… This is nothing but you trying to control your son and deny him the ability to make any decisions for himself. Watch what happens when you keep kids on a tight leash My parents learned the hard way with me that that is a horrible way to handle teenagers. The more you control, the more they’re going to eventually rebel, and then you’ll have no one to blame but you.
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Helicopter parent???
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I also don’t like your comment that says if the girl says he touched her it’s his word against hers , how do you know he didn’t touch her tho ?
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I mean… at some point you have to trust your kid to do the right thing. He knows you don’t want him alone with the opposite sex. Yet he did it anyways. I wouldn’t bar him from going there, he’ll do it anyways with or without your permission. Give the kid some space and some ground rules and hope he follows them…
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Your right you should protect your son
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I agree with you. I wouldn’t trust them again. They flat out lies to you. It doesn’t matter if they agree with your reasoning.
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14 year olds should be allowed to hang out and ‘date’ without being treated like two year olds who need constant supervision. If you don’t trust your child to make the correct choices by now, then you have failed to teach them. Having adults in the house to check in on them regularly, without being a helicopter, is more than appropriate at their age. … Unfortunately your instant reaction that she will accuse him of something says alot about you and how you look at young women. You didn’t even give her a chance to get to know her. I feel for your son, and don’t be surprised when he starts sneaking behind your back because you want to control his life!!! As a mom who was the helicopter at one point, TRUST your child!!!
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You’re to much, your kid is going to resent you for being overbearing. He’s 14 kids are going to be kids. If you’re worried bc if sex then make sure you have the talk but whether you like it or not if they really wanted to they would. I had a boyfriend at 13 and was with him until I was 16 lost my virginity at 16. You can’t be that strict or he’ll leave the first chance he gets.My parents were the same, I was only allowed to be chaperoned. Trust me they will find a way to have sex regardless, you can’t prevent it. Only thing you can do is talk about safe sex etc my parents didn’t allow me to do anything. Strict parents make sneaky kids…I moved out the day I turned 18 bc of how overbearing they were
Kids will lie and say they’re with the same gender and won’t be. Do you want honesty? He was more honest than the parents and possibly wont be in the future. Be careful how you handle these things, that’s all.
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Posts like this is why Facebook needs an eyeroll react emoji.
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I’d call her. Trust me when i tell you some parents are complete shit. I used to have my friends parents lie for me when I was younger and I wish someone would have found out. I wouldn’t have done half the stuff I did. Some of them even provided and smoked weed with us at 13, 14, 15 years old.
I think you, your son, his girlfriend & her mother need to sit down and talk about how important it is to have safe sex because he is old enough for that talk so is she, I don’t think they’re old enough for sex but if they do find a way to do it you want them to be educated, I think you’re overreacting alittle about not letting either of them Come/go to each other’s houses because you’re going to cause him to sneak around & then he’s never going to tell you anything because he’s always going to feel like you’re going to react in a minor like this!! He’s is 14 He is still young but he’s also only 4 years away from being an adult. I think you need to let loose alittle before you cause your son to be sneaky and never come to you or tell you anything!!
And I was pregnant by 16 so don’t let people tell you he should be allowed to make his own decisions and so forth. It’s easy to be talked into things at that age , especially if your “in love”. There are mistakes that he can make that can not be reversed
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As someone who’s best friend got pregnant in a dirty garage when she was 13 and in middle school, I can truthfully say at that age it only takes 2 mins of Alone time and their lives are changing forever. All the people saying to leave them alone and insinuating you let her spend the night must not remember what being 14 feels like because those hormones are BLAZING. I think he should be allowed to “date” but why do they need to be left alone together at 14? They are still children
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There’s alot to unpack here…no, the mom shouldn’t have lied to you but christ, your son is 14…Give him a little room to move, mom! Be proud your son doesn’t feel the need to lie to you when asked…but, you can’t be there to protect him for the rest of his life! He’s growing up…Trust that you have raised him well!
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Poor kid hasn’t done anything to bust your trust & you’re treating him like a prisoner on C-block. I’ve got a 14 year old. Girls come over here & he goes to their houses. I also don’t supervise in public places… that’s just over the top helicopter mom.
I had the talk with both my sons about sex, about unscrupulous girls, about rape & how some girls use that as a weapon & how to protect yourself from it. How to treat a girl, always ask permission even for hand holding.
I have faith in the way I raised my son…. Therefore he has my trust to act like the son I raised.
You ma’am are leading with fear…. & driving a humongous wedge between you & your son. You’re going to push your son into unsafe situations bc he’s going to think you’re an overreacting nut & become sneaky…
You need to get over yourself and stop trying to control your son and their daughter the more you do this the more sneaky they will become your acting like a child
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A lot of y’all are clearly projecting your own sheltered childhood’s onto OP. I don’t get controlling vibes from OP. OP seems disgusted that they were lied to by people who they weren’t sure they could trust and now know that they can’t trust. It’s a lot to process. Cool down, talk with your son, and then together come up with a fair solution. Yes hold him accountable but also give him a voice by letting him help create the solution. And remind him
daily that trust is earned. It will all work out over time
To everyone who shared their opinion instead of solutions, you are what is wr0ng with society. She’s looking for advice, not a popcorn gallery
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Calm down already SMH !
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Your gonna be that mom that tries to control his life when he is an adult were his wife is going to feel alienated by you to the point she divorces him because of you …welcome to your future
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Honestly, you need to back off. You need to allow your son space and some freedom. If you don’t there will be consequences. Quit treating him this way if you don’t want an army of grandchildren.
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I get that being lied to would put a big damper on being able to trust them. However… If you don’t trust your own child… There’s an issue.
Let them be teenagers. The more you force things the harder they will push you away. You were a teen once, we’re you not?
Maybe all they did was watch TV. I understand the worry, however… Holding on so tightly that you have to force him to not see the girl again due to you being lied to… That’s probably not the best move.
Talk to the parents. They are the ones you really should be concerned about.
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Keep helicopter momming him. He will jump from your flight fast. He will start lying to you. Not that he needs to. But give him some trust. Yeah we all know what you are worried about. You need to let him be a kid/young man. Make his choices. Or at least some choices. Otherwise how is he going to know how to in four years when he legally can. Give him options. Like having that girl over. You know. So you can meet her.
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I mean even if you don’t trust the parents, you should trust your son. He told you the truth. You can’t stop teenagers from making mistakes. All you can do os prepare him. Teach him about being safe so if/when something does happen he will at least know how to be responsible.
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Your rules period. And I will call her out on it immediately I would be on that phone with the other parents so fast. You don’t even have to explain why you don’t want them left unattended. You said no and that was that… my mother had a lot of rules and It didn’t matter if I liked it or agreed with it I lived in her house so I had to abide by that. She let me have boys over but they couldn’t be in my room and we could never be behind a closed door we had to be out in the open and she was always there to supervise. In my city and in my neighborhood I always tell my daughter it’s not her that I don’t trust it’s other people.
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You are being a bit overprotective. You are also overreacting a bit. I agree that if you continue down the path, he will push him away and he will rebel. However, as a mom of three sons, I completely understand your fear of false accusations. My boys are 25, 22, and 16. With my older boys I didn’t stress as much. However, since this #metoo movement, I am scared for my six-year-old son. I always tell him before anything happens to make sure he has consent. It only takes one girl one time to say one thing and even if it’s not the truth his life will be ruined. So I get it. So yeah it’s scary but we CAN’T let fear control our lives.
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I don’t even trust girl on girl sleepovers anymore in today’s day and age we have no idea what the kids are into
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Maybe in the future think about allowing the girlfriend to come over to your house so you know that they are 100% supervised the entire time.
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you are overreacting. take a breather.
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Wow, In just a couple years your Child is going to be expect to act life a young responsible adult. With you treating him like a baby at 14, you are setting him up for failure.
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I definitely understand where you’re coming from. My kids aren’t allowed to anyone’s house boy or girl. You’re not wrong mama… speak to the girls mom and oet her know what she was wrong and that your son is no longer allowed over there.
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If your that mom, you will lose all control of him. My son is 16, we have open discussions about sex and girlfriends. Buy him condoms, sit down with his girlfriend ask about birth control. Sorry to be the one to say this but if they are going to have sex it will be out of your control. All you can do is show him how to be respectful towards girls and put some trust in him. Good luck.
They lying is the issue here. You need to let your son breathe, or hell probably end up getting some girl pregnant.
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Here’s something to think about. I had strict parents.Say I didn’t. I went out and got pregnant.(BTW,both my kids are autistic),Imagine being 14,having a child and it being autistic. If this would have happened to me at 14,it would been 1986. So thankful my parents were very strict.And yes,I carry a flawed gene,so my kids would have been Autistic no matter who the father was.
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He’s 14. He’s still a child. She’s got every right to “control” THIS CHILD.
When kids rush in places with guns, beat up elderly and a whole other bunch of crimes we always say “where’s the parents”. Well, this parent is riding her kids ass, just as she should. She don’t want to be a grandma to her child’s child either.
Um…you’re going to set your son up to sneak around. He is going to make his own decisions, have the safety talk with him and let him know you trust him to make good choices.
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Yikes lol. He’s 14 not 8 lmfao. I get not wanting them unsupervised but this is insane.
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I think that you’re overreacting,
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You are a helicopter mom and I’d hate to be your child. Just admit it. You don’t trust him. End of story. He’s almost a teen and let me tell you, you will be the reason if he goes off track. Let him experience having fun. Trust him. He needs a tad freedom. I was at my boyfriends house at 14. At 16 I slept over my boyfriends house. Guess what? Never got pregnant. And now he’s my husband.
Being lied to is wrong and I’d talk to the parents about it, but don’t take it out on the kids. Let them be teens (preteens)
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So here’s the thing: he TOLD you what they did. SO he was honest with you. Focus on that. Yes, the mother lied to you. Probably, because she didn’t thin it was a big deal. You need to have a long talk with your son. Explain to him that choices he makes now can have an effect on the rest of his life. Make it clear that he did nothing wrong (because he didn’t, he followed the rules of the house where he was).
If he’s invited to go to her home again, you should tell him no. If the mom calls to invite him, tell her “No” and explain that the lack of trust is in HER and HER lying to you about the level of supervision in her home.
Young men get falsely accused of sexual assault after consensual sex more often than anyone here probably realizes. I’d also have a very frank talk with him about the dangers of sexting each other. A lot of teens do it by Snap Chat under the impression that the image “disappears”, but a screen shot is all it takes for them both to be accused of child pornography and to be labeled sex offenders, (To those who think this doesn’t happen, I’d introduce you to our neighbor’s son, except I can’t because he’s in state jail over having nude pictures of his 14 year old girlfriend. Her parents had no problem with the two of them being alone together. Her older brother did, found the pictures, and filed charges with the police).
I would be LIVID!! Definitely confront her.
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I will say this, the fact that your son was honest is huge & shows his character. But I think it may be best to allow her to come over & that way you’re comfortable with them being supervised. If you push too hard he’s going to start to go behind your back, I can speak from personal experience on that. However I completely understand the fear in raising a son against a world of crazy Amber Heards. He may do everything by the book but still have someone be accusatory. Raising him to be respectful and honest is massive - which it sounds like you’re doing. But also acknowledge that in high school kids date.
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Well you can almost guarantee your son will never be honest with you again. He didn’t lie, he told the truth. You overreacting is going to cause him to be more careful with what he shares with you in the future.
Yes, fourteen year olds have raging hormones but that doesn’t mean this girl is going to seduce your son. It is much more likely to happen the other way around. I say that as a mom of three boys.
I was also fourteen once, and that was THE LAST thing on my mind. You need to step back and evaluate your automatic response to this girl. You act as if she has already accused your son of something. She’s a child and your perception of her is a bit unhinged. It is also unfair, you barely know this girl and are making assumptions based on what? Age and gender? That’s a bit biased.
Her parents lied, or maybe they didn’t lie and things changed, it happens. I HIGHLY doubt they said “we don’t have a finished basement…” and if they did you should have known such a specific remark was a lie. Either way, your son was honest but don’t expect that in the future.
Also, if you think public places or even parents will stop two teenagers from doing something, you are extremely misguided. Teenagers will ALWAYS find a way.
And this is EXACTLY why I Ieft home at 16, got married, and never looked back. I’d advise you tread lightly here. Once you damage that relationship with your son it’s hard to repair.
You can be a mom and guide him correctly without being controlling.
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Happened to me, also, w/ my younger daughter. Wake up call, for sure. You are RIGHT to keep tabs.
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I’m not sure why you’re not allowing your son to spend time with her at her house or yours? Why not create a safe space for them? You’re going to encounter MANY more lies for creating this strict environment and you’ll eventually ruin the relationship you have with your son.
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I saw? “His Quote girlfriend”? It took me back to being a 14yr old? I am triggered. Your son’s relationship and girlfriend is real. His feelings are real. He’s living in the real world. He sounds like a good kid? Seeing as this is your complaint. You don’t have an emotional/mental connection with your boy. You don’t respect his feelings. You don’t care (I’m sure)? He’s a human being though? He’s your son. He’s not a 14yr old in your care to control his every move? All because of your fear’s. Whatever your fear’s and hangups are? Stop projecting that on him? The things that you fear the most? You are making them happen. You are driving him away from you. Take off your overbearing mom hat for a minute. Stop being afraid of letting someone else into your family? You know it won’t work out with him and his girlfriend because they are so young and he will probably have many more girlfriends before he gets married right? So except her and embrace her she may only be around for a little while. It’s really not that serious. You’re making it that serious. The first chance he gets he’s going run away from you. 
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You obviously tdont trust your son 
this is just sad
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Everyone who says shes over reacting, she definitely isnt. "Your poor son "etc Hes 14!! not 17+ .🤦🏼♀ id be mad too. I have 3 sons and they arent going to be going over to girlfriends houses etc at that age either 🤷🏼♀ so guess im a bad over protective strict ahole mom too huh🙄PALEASE
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Yes you are over reacting big time, not cool that the girls parents lied to you but at the end of the day your son, the one that matters here, told you the truth. Give him a little room to live his life. Stop trying to control everything, he is going to rebel and your relationship is going to suffer terribly. You’ve been raising him for 14 years with the morals and values that you’ve chosen, give him the chance to show he’s learned from it. I am a boy mom, he’s 26 now, has a wife and 4 year old son. He was always a good kid and never accused of anything. I know he’s a good man, I raised him.
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Ok momma, you need to loosen your grip a bit on your boy cause as soon as he gets older and gets away from that leash, it’s a possibility he’ll run and not look back
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I get being upset about being lied to. I hate being lied to because it’s the liar telling me they think I’m too stupid to know I’m being lied to. As far as the level of supervision expected, that is why I prefer to allow my kids to have their “boy/girl-friends” hang out at my house. For one, I get to observe the other kid to see what type of kid they are. I know what kind of kid I raised and it gives me the opportunity to see if my kid is going to reflect the way they were raised. I trust my kids, but I know that they are kids. Mine know that I could (and do) walk in to whatever area in my house they are in at ANY moment, and that is a good reason to keep their hands to themselves. Having said that, if we don’t trust our kids enough to give them a little room to grow and develope their own boundaries, when they DO find a way around our best efforts to protect them (and they WILL) they won’t be as discerning as we would hope they would.
That’s just my take on the whole thing.
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The kid can’t even go to his girlfriends for supper? Damn, just be prepared he is going to rebel bad with you being like this. Have a little compassion for the kid, let him learn to make his own mistakes and enjoy love
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Your feelings are valid considering you were lied to. If you want the 100٪ supervised then you should allow her at your house. It’s time to talk to him about safe sex though mama. My son is 13. He knows what safe sex is, he knows unprotected sex leads to babies, and if and when hes thinking about it to come to me first. You need to trust him to make the right choices. Be happy he didn’t lie to you. I lost my virginity at 14. While not proud, I understood what it could lead to and was safe about it and didn’t have a baby until I was 21. If they want to do it, they will find a way. Would be much better if he was prepared though. I get it, my oldest is a teen. Hes comfortable coming to me and asking questions. Your son needs to feel that way too. It may backfire if you don’t allow him to see her. Let him breathe. Let him make mistakes, but you can help him from becoming a teen parent by teaching him. Let him know it OK to come tou you when he starts having thos feelings. I would talk to her mother and explain your feelings. Obviously girls parents trust her enough, you need to do the same.
Well with all due respect, your son is probably hating his teen years right now. Understandable that you want your child to stay on the right path and make good choices but unfortunately smothering him will only make him want to do it more. You have got to chill out lol. Her parents lied to you probably because they think you’re spazzing out over nothing. Sounds like you go way overboard and should possibly take a step back and deal with the emotional aspect of what you’re going through. It sounds to me like you’re overbearing onto your son because you hate the fact that he’s growing up. I get it, as a mother that’s our job. But it’s also our job to let them live and learn on their own. You can’t get wise and learn valuable lessons if you’re never allowed out in the world to gain those experiences. If you trust your son as much as you say you do then you should let him breath a little and learn who he is. Best of luck, it’s gonna be all ok momma.
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You’re doing a great job mom…wish more was like you…
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You are teaching your son you don’t trust him…or any girl he hangs out with. How sad for him…
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You’re that mother in law no wife of your sons will like. Let alone see her children.
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All these people mad cause you won’t leave your 14 year old unsupervised. Yikes.
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If this post ended with “now’s shes pregnant,” y’all would be shaming her for letting her kid go over there 
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Your kid your rules but also at least the parents were home…they just weren’t in the same room. At least Your son was honest. Next time tell the girls mom you would rather her come to your house. It’s smart to keep tabs but it’s also smart to give them a little breathing room so they dont feel like they have to sneak around.
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You are right but I would suggest letting the girl come to your house where you know they will be supervised
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While right now your emotions are high and very real, hopefully some of what has been said are going to be taken into consideration.
I had a strict mother, and her being such a strict parent made me feel I had to sneak around to do anything. Even basic household things, things she literally asked me to do, I felt I had to sneak around to do because she was THAT strict. I was always honest when asked what I was up to, and even though I didn’t do drugs or drink, I was literally just trying to hang out with my female friend that lived 5 minutes away half the time, I’d still be punished like I had been drunk, high, sleeping with every person that looked at me, and like I lied about it. She even went as far as flushing my birth control pills at 15 because she felt they were causing massive mood swings (I’ll get to that real cause in a minute.)
Essentially, she was over protective, and she over reacted. Her feelings were very real to her, yes, but she never took a step back to see if how she handled things were okay and how they affected me.
I’m 27 now. I had my first child at 17, because as strict as she was, I was still a hormonal teenager. The father was my long term boyfriend, and I used all the protection I had available. I still finished school, I have a beautiful family now… BUT…
I don’t speak to my mother, and I have quiet Borderline Personality Disorder, and it’s something I’d never wish on anyone. The way she raised me, while she thought she was doing the right thing, only caused more and more damage as the years went on. She always felt like she was making the right decisions for her, but she never stopped to ask what the right thing for me was.
So if you’ve made it this far and you’re going to take anything from what I’ve said, at least take this - once your emotions have had their time, do what you can to take a step back, think about your son and what’s best for him vs what’s best for you, and ask yourself if your son, a 14 year old who showed maturity by telling you the truth, fully knowing it would upset you, is more of a young man than you’ve realized
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First off take a chill pill. He’s 14. He’s not a little child anymore, he’s a teenager with raging hormones. I lost my virginity at 14 
but it was my first serious relationship. I also ended up with a pregnancy scare. My mom was upset about me having sex but then stuck me right on birth control. I get it that you don’t want him to have sex, but you can’t stop the inevitable.
Instead of sitting there freaking out on him, which will in turn cause him to no longer confide in you and start hiding things:
-Sit him down and have a THOROUGH, NON BIAS conversation on Sex Ed and how to practice safe sex. I say non bias, because you need to explain everything and not just preach about abstinence.
-Praise him for coming to you and being honest, because he needs reassurance that he did the right thing by telling you the truth. This will allow him to become more comfortable talking to you about more serious issues.
-Speak with the girls parents, and ensure that IF anything were to happen, that she is also practicing safe sex.
He will make his own decision whether to have sex or not, and it’s up to him to be able to go into that situation with as much knowledge as possible.
Your a nut job!!! I am a crazy over protective mother!!! Your just flat out crazy!
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I grew up in a house where I couldn’t even go to my friends house and they RARELY came to mine…much less a boyfriend. To put it into perspective for you… I ran away from home when I was 14 because I hated that I couldn’t just do regular kid stuff and it was even worse when I came back home and I just learned to be sneaky. Since I wasn’t trusted to do normal things anyway then why would I try to be “good”?
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Considering I walked in on a freshman crying that she (14) was pregnant when I was a sophomore (15) yup I would do my best to make sure they weren’t alone too.
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I never encouraged my kids to have sex… but when they were asked to go somewhere I always made sure they had access to protection because where there’s a will there’s a way and my kids none of them got pregnant had babies til they were over 18! Just because they are at a house with parents don’t mean they won’t have sex… I was 14 and my bf came to my house and we always found ways (luckily I didn’t end up prego) I hated that I could never talk to my mom about stuff because she wouldn’t flipped out and beat the crap out of me if she would’ve found out so talk to him about this stuff and tell him to talk to you when he’s wanting to do this… ALL 4 of my kids came to me and talked to me about it and I made sure my daughter was in birth control and they all have protection like I said I. Never encouraged it but if they wanted to do it they would find a way so just talk to him about things before it’s to late best wishes
I cannot believe how many people are upset with this mama, No wonder the world is going the way it is going!
These kids are 14! Mama keep raising him right and maybe he will grow up to be a fine outstanding responible man who has kids that he raises the same! If we had more of this maybe our country and world could get back to being healthy, and responsible!
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Mam you are to strict let him have some freedom
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I wouldn’t call her I would wait until she asks again. If the parents are like that, imagine how their daughter is. People throw around accusations like confetti now. Little girls be trying to get pregnant at 11/12/13. I am totally on board with you keeping your son in a chaperoned dating situation, and if anyone tells you otherwise they can pound sand! (Coming from a Christian mama with a 15 year old boy)
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Holy shit loosen the chokehold a little hes 14 not 8. You about to have a weird and angry teen on your hands and in your basement til hes 40 if you dont let them learn about the P and the V.
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What your worried about is valid
I have a 15 year old daughter so I understand
I have learned tho it doesn’t matter if they are alone or not
If it’s gonna happen it’s gonna happen
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Different houses have different rules . You can’t control what happens at other peoples houses . You need to get to know this girl and stop creating a situation where they are sneaking around to see each other . Invite her for dinner and let them hang out supervised at your home .
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Trust me if your kid wants to have sex he’s going too and you won’t stop him. Also kids who feel they have no freedom and have parents like you who put no trust in them are the first to have sex and not tell you because of how you act. My daughter is almost 16 and has been with the same boy for over 2 years. She lost her virginity not long ago and do u know who she told first? Me I was the first person she called, did it break my heart of course, but what did I do,? What any good mom would do! Let her ask as many questions as she wanted, Amazon Primed her (not living with me during that summer) anyway Amazon’s next day a huge box of condoms and made her an appointment for birth control! I am so thankful she came to me first! Your son will never come to you and that’s a shame!!!
I know what I was doing at 14 when I was alone with boys 
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I honestly did not read the entire thing because I see absolutely no reason why kids cannot hang out you’re just setting your son up to turn into a sneaky and defiant teenager
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You shouldn’t call the mom. If she calls again and wants him to come over just say no that you aren’t comfortable with that. Let his gf come over to your house where you know they are supervised
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You’re a prude. I am 45 and even at 14 then my parents allowed me at boys houses and them at ours. He’s growing up whether you like it or not and the harder you push against it, the harder he’ll rebel. Loosen the reigns. It’s time. Otherwise he’ll grow to resent you.
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The more u try to keep them apart, the more they will look for ways to be alone together somewhere. Back off n trust ur child. Talk to him about ur concerns but don’t be so overbearing n over-protective. What happened in ur childhood that u think ur child will repeat the pattern?
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