After 5 years of not receiving any child support .The state finally took my ex husband’s taxes for back CS. My adult son(20) called and told me when I get the money I need to send him half of it since half is his . I am flabbergasted and really don’t know how to respond .I did raise 2 children without any help from their father.
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Do I have to send half the money?
Be straight up with him and explain how it works before he becomes just like his sperm donor.
He’s lost his mind. It’s to cover your costs.
Thar was suppose to be there to help you take care of them not for the adult child to take 8 wouldnt give it to him
I wouldn’t. Because you paid for What he needed when you didn’t have any help that’s to repay you
Hows half his if he owes back cs… Is he on drugs:rofl:
I would give to the child
He didn’t raise himself so no it’s yours. So send him a bill for his care itemized rent food clothes ect . Then apply his half to his bill .
Wow he’s something else
I wonder how he found out
Please ignore him and go get yourself a nice massage and dinner
That child lost his mind. You had bills. Food. Sports. School. What not with zero help naw.
Absolutely not, child support is to help YOU with things to raise your children
No, it’s pay back for all you did to raise him
Not a chance. That money is from when he was a child and you cared for him alone.
Unbelievable he would even ask
Ummmm NO MAM. You are the one that paid for EVERYTHING until he was 18 when you weren’t receiving childsupport. That is YOUR money.
Nope that’s all yours
Um nope that’s 100% YOURS he already grown and is raised by u with YOUR money so its payback!
It was paid to who it was owed to. Simple.
That’s really ballsy isn’t it? Does it sound like it came from his Dad?
It’s not for current support on him it is for support on him before he became of age ! So no! & you can tell him that!
That’s crazy shit. No fucking way.
That is crazy I would not give him a dime of it . Tell him to get a job
That’s for back child support that goes to you period
I have this argument with my daughter as well
Tell your son to beat it
Nope…it’s back child support to replace money you had to spend on taking care of them without any.
Nope, that money is supposed to help u RAISE your kids, since u did it alone then he isn’t entitled to any it because I already paid for everything to raise him
Nope, he’s definitely not entitled to any of it.
I wouldn’t ask my mom for any money so no
Ridiculous of him to expect
That is REIMBURSEMENT to YOU for everything you paid while he was growing up.
Only if he worked and paid to raise himself. I’d have a hard time getting past his attitude.
None of it’s his! Back pay on child support is all yours honey
YOU are being paid back for doing it all on your own. It’s entirely yours.
He probably got this idea from his father to ask. But no it is yours from back pay. You already took care of the 20 year olds needs and so it is yours to do what you will
Ummm… Hell no. Not how it works young man.
And they gave you that money and not him…
That $$ is 100% yours and repayment for everything you had to do on your own
Nope that’s reimbursement for what you already spent, it’s yours.
You paid your part and his part no keep it all
No lol! Thats you’re money!
That money was to help you raise him. You done it all now it’s repaying you. The money belongs to you. It is up to you if you want to give him half, some, or none. He is not entitled to a penny though.
I’m curious why he expects it. It’s a refund of money you already spent on him. Is his father putting these ideas in his head?
It’s not half his… this is paying you back from money that YOU paid out for the kids over the last 5 years. It’s not current … its for the shoes he got when he was 15 and the hamburger he ate when he was 16. I’m appalled by the balls on that kid to be honest!
Sounds like ur son is like his father
I think the kid is full of it. You should agree to this arrangement, with the condition he pay you back exactly half of the full cost of raising him, prior to receiving any compensation. Tell him you’re willing to give him half of the money after those terms are met- and he can meet with you and your attorney to draw up the paperwork. Bet he doesn’t continue with his faulty thought process. You owe him nothing at all. You’d be foolish to even entertain him.
Well I’m certain if it belonged to him they would of sent it to his bank and not yours ma’am
Ummm hell to the NO! I can’t ever imagine one of my boys saying that to me. Your name is on the check… PERIOD.
You could place some Into a trust, or apply towards college.
Garnished for back-owed means it’s paying YOU back for what their portion was to provide for the child. You already spent that out of pocket. You owe your ADULT son NOTHING. If he wants money he can ask the father that refused to pay for his needs, not mom who pays for MORE than half.
Nope he’s grown it’s back child support you raised em you keep it
That’s your money that you used to raise him. I would be so hurt if my son ask that of me
Umm no! I’d be like BACK child support for BACK when I was raising you with NO HELP! It would on you if you wanted to give him any but he’s definitely not entitled to it & acting that way I’m not so sure I’d give him any. Good luck!
This is any easy one. NO!! I sure all you ladies will not tell me go to hell with this response
Yes. Give him some maybe not half… He is the reason that you’re getting it. I don’t get child support but if I did… My children would get a percentage of each check
Idk that I’d just give it directly to him, and idk how much it is, but maybe just put it in a separate acct and keep it handy for a time when your son needs a oil change, or college or whatever he may NEED one day.
It’s not his money. If it was, the state would be paying him not you.
Nope the same thing happened to my husband , his dad never paid child support but about six years ago his dad finally gave his mom the back child support that was owed to her because he ended up selling a property he had none of the siblings and himself saw any of the money I think his mom ended up buying a car for herself and then put it towards other expenses that she had to pay off!!
My ex called my son to tell him that back payments were going to me and he’s entitled to part
It is your money not his
Why is this even a question? Why wouldn’t you want to give the child adult or not half of the CHILD support? I mean come on now what kinda selfish question is this anyway? We are all struggling in life so why not help your child? Just because he is as you call it an adult that doesn’t mean you stop being there for your child and stop helping them! Give him some of the CHILD support and stop the oh it’s all for me crap. Who cares you raised him on your own guess what many moms do it without child support. Get over it.
It doesn’t belong to your children! You raised them with no help. That money is yours! CS is not for your children to do with what they want. It was for room/shelter, medical/school/sports/clothing/food/electric/water/heat and so on!
Absolutely NOT. That’s yours. You raised him alone. The audacity… Whewwee… Lawd… Jesus, take the wheel. I’d have let him have it.
I mean, I would
Nope. U raised his ass with no help and it is yours to do what u please.
What makes him think half is his? Did he pay the rent and the electric and buy the groceries his entire childhood?
I’d tell him give u half for raising him
Definitely not his money, that is to replace any money you have already spent on raising him.
That money is yours not your son’s
My grandmother who raised me and my brother gave us our child support money card when we turned 18, I think you should do the same.
Ppl need to start normalizing that these kids need to stay out of grown folks business. Shouldn’t of told him in the first place.And it’s yours.
Nope. You are the parent and the one entitled to that back child support. He should be proud of you for raising him without! You owe him, one penny for his thoughts! Carry on …
Did the dad buy the son anything or give him anything over the last 5 years? If the answer is no, I can kinda see why the son thinks he should get something. But whatever amount you’re getting, it would be a nice compromise to give your kids a small portion of the money. But definitely avoid giving him half lol
That is not how that works. The money you spent on the child is that money. You paid 100% for everything and that money is to reimburse you for the father’s portion. Covers everything from food, to clothes, to shelter and any other expenses.
Honestly me being me I wouldn’t send half. But if I ever got to see anything from the $100,000.00 that my oldest Child’s dad owes my son (17) now would get a little portion. Not half.
Don’t send nothing tf
That would be the day
Lmao so raising him and paying for his every need for 18 years with zero help wasn’t good enough? Personally, he should be contacting his daddy for more money. Not trying to weasel money from you after you went without support for god knows how long. What a little shit.
No your child doesn’t get that money. That money was to help raise him. Which sounds like u did all on ur own. That’s 100% your money not his.
Instead I’d buy him a box of condoms and say “here my way of helping u so u don’t end up in the same spot as your father” smh some ppl are so entitled
It’s like you raised him on a “loan”. Now you’re getting paid back for that loan. I wouldn’t pay him at all. You already raised him on your own. This is reimbursing you for your expenses.
It’s not his money. Child support is to pay for the day to day costs of raising the child. It’s back child support, but support for him now.
No… more than likely dear old daddy put him up to it.
It’s yours…you already supported him!
No you don’t its yours
Tally up everything you’ve spent raising him, then deduct half of what you get from the child support, and send him the balance and tell him that’s what he owes you for raising him
Uh no, that money went to raising him all those years. He isn’t entitled to any of it. He got it in light, rent, Food all the years you didn’t receive it.
Absolutely not. You had to fully support your kids while getting no help from their father…. Putting a roof over head, clothes on their back, making sure there was heat in the house during the winter and so much more.
Since he wants to be such a turd, I’d make a itemized list of what it cost to raise him with a bill of how much he owes you especially if you contributed after 18 and that’s what he’d get from me. Tell him to buzz off. He has no respect for you.
Sounds like the 20 year old needs to grow up a little more. Of course, you could bill him for the years he was supported.
Shame on your son! No way should he get any of that money ! You earned every penny of that money!;.
You do not need to send him anything … you are the one that worked to take care of him … the money being sent to you is money that was owed to you …
NOPE! That money is YOURS! You raised your kids on your dime and NONE of that goes to your kid! Since his dad did NOT support him then he should be THANKFUL that you did! My kids are 24&25 and I also get back child support and believe me I use that to get my nails done, buy wine, get lashes done shoot lol I use that money on ME since there were times I went without so that my kids had a roof.
100% that is not his money. And how did he come up with 1/2?
Give him an automized bill for two years under your roof. He’ll owe you before he gets another year under his ass.
Girl hell no, I wouldn’t dare ask my money for that money. Tell him to kiss your ass Lmaooo. Since he’s 20 and want to be grown.
Sounds like your son is as entitled as his dad…
That money is yours. It’s the money you should have got and worked hard for and spent out of your pocket to raise them
My 2 younger sisters pulled this with my mom when she received a lump of back-support after we were all graduated. I couldn’t believe my mom felt like she had to share it with them because they felt entitled to it. She raised them, I helped(given i was the oldest i cooked and cleaned), but she worked her butt off to make sure we had what we needed. I don’t ever remember going without anything but present parents… and that was because SHE was working to take care of us. Why would we deserve any of that?
Tell your son that he can have what he financially contributed to the household during that time, minus expenses.
Helllll NO! I would call it even.
That was a good joke