Move on and let him know that is your plan, he left you, and his kids remember that.
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Simple answer ā¦ NO! Lived apart 10 yrs due to work in different states. Been there, done that. NO!
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Nope. He trynna (or already is) F around!! He didnt clear up his verbiage, he meant to say he needs a F space, that doesnāt include you or your kids being around his space!
To me he is only thinking of himself not you or the kids. Iām going to say divorce him. Maybe than heāll know how good he really had it. I think there is more that he isnāt telling you. Hope things get better for you.
BS probably he just wants no child support
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Girl stop playing yourself heās got something else going on and u and those kids are in the way
Maybe if he needed his space shaving separate rooms might had helped
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I know this may not be the norm but there are men and women out there that may choose to live separately that are not cheatingā¦ space can be good and healthy. Sometimes if itās just a stage in that personās life they are going thru. But I also know that men sometimes will live different lives and will cheatā¦ all I know is Iāve seen both from the outside and thereās no 100% right or wrong answer. Thereās only whatās right for youā¦ If you suspect cheating or alterior motives, do your diligence to figure out the truthā¦ Donāt make assumptions based on opinions. Donāt put all stock into all of these people that do not know your family personally. Even close friends and family donāt always have the answers. No one knows your relationship besides you. Good luck, and again, donāt put all stock in what everyone else thinks. Listen to strangerās advice at face value. Be aware of the possibilities, not to let yourself be naive, but search for the truth yourself. Everyoneās differentā¦
He has a girlfriend and is confused
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He moved out and signed a lease. Has the kids going back and forth like your divorced, go file for food stamps, child support and medical. He moved out to take care of himself. Yet you still have three kids that need to be taken care of, you still have bills that need paid, food to buy. So take a chapter out of his book and do what you need to for you and your kids
Dare you to go over to his house late at night. See if heāll let you in if no then heās definitely cheating!
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Dump his ass. File for divorce, child support & alimony if you qualify for that. He is burdening the entire family so he can sew his oats. Bye.
Ive notice the 7 year mark is a crucial year for a marriage. I called it the make or break it year. My husband and I were friends since 11 and I was 13. We dated once around that time didnt work I was too boy crazy as a teenager and sisnt wabt to hurt him so we stayed friends till he was 16 almost 17 and I was almost 19. Took the chance again. Been together 20 years married for 15. I thought they 7 yr mark was only hard for us as we were changing as a person basically growing up. And it took a toll on our relationship. Made things stale we had 4 kids at this time and both had some issues about our childhood that came back to haunt us so it was more we needed to work on ourselves but if u dont do it together and have communication which is a main key in a successful marriage then it wont work. I have watched many peoole hit thay 7 year have the nake it or break it time and over half didnt make it past that year. The ones that did are going on 12 to 20 years together now. I also feel u fight for what u want. If u want him talk to him find out the issues and both fix them because him moving out is a big step to the end. Why put so much time and energy into a relationship to have it fail if there is not serious reason for it to fail. If he chests or has cheated then let him go if he has not maybe there is just something missing or soething he wants changed and thinka u wont do it for yalls relationship and vice versa. Marriage is hard freak in work. Its not easy like people make it out to be. But u cant jist throw it away so easily either. Back in the day men and women fought hard to keep their marriages. In todays world people are quicj to give it up cause its bot a fairy tale like they wanted.
Sorry he is 100% cheating
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I would say ā¦if he needs to sort himself out then thatās fine but donāt wait around for someone thatās left you dealing with the home the children 
YOU sort YOU an your babies . Plus tbh my first thought was something isnāt sitting right here ā¦turn up completely unannounced very late . I believe youāll get your answers .
I would have to agree. He is cheating.
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I canāt understand thisā¦ how does he still love her and want everything but just needs space? Uhhh no somethings going on here. Lol Iāve been in this situation but vise versa. No love there and still live together lol. 
for the kids. That went on for a year. We were the best of friends and roommates!
My dad was always gone growing up. He was always working. And there was a point my dad and mom were separated because of issues with my younger brother. My parents work through the issues and are still married almost 35 years later. My dad and mom were high school sweethearts. 3 kids, 3 grandchildren and they are still married
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He just wants his cake and to be able eat it too !!!
Donāt fall for this, it will only hurt you and your kids more in the long run.
Stay strong 
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So many people jumping to conclusions here. Does the thought of maybe he is suffering mental health issues cross your mind? If he has asked for a bit of space, Iād respect that. Sometime people need space to sort themselves out and get a clear vision on life. Mid-life crisis? I would definitely speak to him and see where his head is at and if he is ok! be open and honest not brutal and judgmental like half the people who have commented on your post. Maybe he is having an affair maybe he isnāt. You need to communicate
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Some times space is the best thingā¦it will show u just where your marriage stands. It doesnāt mean heās cheatingā¦but if he isā¦it will come out. U canāt keep someone who doesnāt want to be kept.
You will see if he wants the marriage or not. I bet most of the people who say heās cheating are not married. Married people understand these situations a little better.
Not good it wonāt work like as u said ifhetruly loved you heād stay work things out not leave you& kids be torn apart,donāt believe him ,go see if anyone else there with him then you will know,good luck,x
His cheating on you leave him!
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My son in law just told my daughter he wants to move out. Theyāll be married 31 years in 2 weeks. Itās very heartbreaking
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I think I might be the only one in these comments who thinks separating may make yāall relationship work. Let him move out. Tell his azz he needs to hustle hustle now bcuz him needing space is causing a financial burden that wasnāt there before. But let him go. Make sure you have a key just in case you feel the need to do a pop up. It may be best that the both of yāall get sometime without each other to realize how much yāall need to be with one another. Or maybe you might find your freedom more exciting and him being miserable. You never know. I would tell you this though, since he initiate the moving out donāt go over there and clean for him, donāt cook, donāt do his laundry, nothing! He will value you your presence more I can almost guarantee. Plus dress up more while heās gone, go have a few drinks with friends or movies or something, show him what heās missing and who he fell in love with. Couple months heās going to be crying on your lap saying he fuqāed up.
I donāt suspect any cheating. I think some people just need actual space. I think he moved out because he does love you and want to make it work. Not every marriage is the same and not everyone follows traditional rules. You guys have to figure out what works for you.
Heās probably cheating on you. He wants his cake and eat it too . He doesnāt want the responsibility of being a husband and full time father or pay child support. Leave him 100% separate and file for child support and move on with your life. Heās playing games if he loved you he would had never left you and the kids. Thereās so much more to his story. Good luck
Try catch him out turn up to his house with kids on days he doesnt know,
My friend went through thisā¦for 20yrs!!! YES!!! Both professionals with separate bank accounts etc, etc. Income and/or child support was not an issue.
On her 50th birthday, she finally woke upā¦filed for divorce, 60 days later a divorce was granted.
Now she is in therapy, because she always had hope theyād reconcileā¦and now mourns the 20 yrs of her life she lost/sacrificed.
The husbandā¦?.. he never had a girlfriend, hasnāt remarriedā¦he just wanted, truly, his own space.
Itās the weirdest thingā¦
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Donāt believe him investigate youāll probably find out heās cheating on you. listen to your gut feelings it donāt lie. Iām sorry your going through that!!!
Nmpala Tori Jackie your thoughts
Freeze the savings ~ and file . He definitely needs his āspaceā for what private things you and the kids can not be a part of??? When taking vows~ itās not in them to abandon you. Sounds like he is helping you remove him and his āwaysā
Yeah right and you believe this.# @ new girlfriend.
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Pretty disgusted in some of the comments just assuming hes cheating without any knowledge of the situation other then hes moved out. Pretty sad really 
talk about tarring people with the same brush 
maybe he has moved out as things in the relationship arent getting better with what they have already tried and he just needs some space of his own. He hasnt left the women he is 5 mins down the road! Im sure hes open to helping with the kids and being a family as much as he can from seperate homes. I would say things must be pretty bad for him to want to move out. Even though it might not be the right way to fix things at least hes trying. I think you need to try to communicate with ur husband and try some marriage counselling rather then asking for opinions on here I feel very sorry for u that so many women jump straight to the āhes definitely cheatingā thats a terrible mindset to have so very negative. Yes im sure its been the case for many women but im sure it hasnt for many others also
Iām not sure id have that, Iād feel like its ok for him to go 2hat about me with the kids etc because although they are going from house to house you will still be the main carer, but like others havesaidid be inclined to check up on him I dong mean to make you feel bad but trust your gut, however I do know a couple that lived together and loved each other but couldnāt get on living together and they have a place each still date,still go to each others homes still go to weddings parties etc together they are a couple but live in separate houses x
He just doesnāt want to pay child support and he is going to drain the savings first so you are left with nothingā¦def probably ācheatingā if you could even call it that at this point. (Just my opinion)
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Iād say heās cheating. Heās trying to see what he wants more.
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Woww, my husband and I were married for 14 years and 3 kids. He also moved out and left me. He wanted to live his single life but have me on the low. At the beginning I didnāt see him for weeks and then he started coming more often we would keep our life like if we lived together. Come the weekend he was out.
Until I said itās really over. It took me some time to realize the whole picture. Then I took time for myself to get pretty. I started going to the gym. I started going out more and meeting new people. 2 years later I met a guy. We started going out to dance and I was enjoying the time.
A few months later when my husband found out, he came back crying and said he felt lonely that he wanted another baby and I said āIām sorry honeyā but that day that you left that day you took my respect with you and now Iām in love with someone else. You pushed me to this, you made me do it.
Till this day he regrets, our kids are big now and he always tells them āI miss your momā. Now the guy that wiped my tears because of him, is my husband now. We have a 2 year old baby and been together for almost 11 years now.
My ex husband has now a woman that is crazy, donāt work, when I say crazy sheās crazy. I really do hope he finds a woman like me, someone that can care good for him. I donāt hate him I always wish him good. I cannot hate someone I was once deeply in love. He was my prince. I never saw our ending but thatās what he chose.
Iām happy now!
Seek marriage counseling
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thats not working on it
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So, been there, done thatā¦.itās called the 7 year itch, so to speak. My husband and I went through thisā¦.it is hard, almost got divorced, but I never signed anything. We went to therapy and it was intenseā¦found out he had a girl friend. We have childrenā¦.it took a long long time to get through it, but now we are really strong. Iāve seen a lot of people not survive what we did, but itās really amazing now. Best of luck to you.
He has a girlfriend. Men donāt leave to pay two homes. Set your boundaries. He made his choice now take your life back
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Its the first phase of a crumbling marriage. He wants his cake and eat it too. Either seek counselling to save the marriage or end it completely. Do not let him keep you in a state of limbo so he can live the single life with the option of security in you still being there.
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Sorry honey heās gone. Gone I tell ya. Let him go. Donāt waste more years on him. Just let him go. Fill for divorce. Do it with no hate or regrets. Life changes. Love changes. You had a good run. It sounds like he wants his cake and eat it too. So pray he finds his peace and let him go. You will recover you will start over you will find love again. A love that will last. Take it as a life lesson. Bless you.
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Sounds like he wants to have his cake and eat it ! 
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That man doesnāt want to be bothered with his kids and/or has a girlfriend during the week.
Space is a hotel stay, not a lease. A lease is a separation or breakup.
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Oooofff. Start to become self sufficient. Spare bedroom is separate, different house is not helpful for you or the kids
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Sounds like he doesnāt want to be with you but cares and loves you and the kids enough but doesnāt want to pay for and go through the divorce process
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Seek councelling. The past 18months have had an adverse effect on many people. Keep speaking to each other and I hope you can work it out. Xxx
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Let him move out permanently or come home and work it out,
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Sometimes a little space goes a long wayā¦ they say āabsence makes the heart grow fonder ā and itās my experience that is very true if yāall are truly meant for each other you will get thru this good luck n God bless
Ummmm NO thatās not working on it! Thatās nothing more than wanting YOU to stay committed while he has the Freedom to do whatever he wants. I would slap his ass with Divorce papers IMMEDIATELY!
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Love to hear his input!! He left for a reasonā¦
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Sounds like heās testing the waters elsewhere before he makes it permanent. Iād file for divorce immediately. Donāt let him play you for a fool.
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No! Thatās not a marriage.
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Best to chat with an attorney to protect yourself and your kids.
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No. It doesnāt. Thereās always the small chance of meeting together in the future but at this point you need to focus on yourself because he probably has been doing that already.
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Maybe he didnāt know that you wanted him to stay
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The exact same thing happened to me. No matter what he says, he has a girlfriend or has his eyes on one. My husband did tha same thing and wanted to go back and forth. File for a legal separation and get legal advice on how to proceed. The counseling BS us just a ploy to keep stringing you along.
Sounds like my perfect relationship but then I donāt have kids to consider.
He may be genuine; it can be intense as hell sharing a space with someone. The acid test will be whether he functions better following this move, i.e. if he can take you out at times, come and see you, be attentive and generally make you feel loved, then it may be a damn good idea.
If he canāt, or doesnāt, youāll be left questioning what heās doing when heās not with you and feeling generally let down, as you sound at the moment. My suggestion is try to step back from the automatic judgement that āthis is badā and give it time to see whether he can make it work for the both of you.
But donāt be taken for a fool. Make it clear to him that as he has taken the initiative to live separately, he needs to take more initiative to make the relationship work and keep on working. Try to work out some sort of plan so you can see how itās going over the course of a few months, and maybe encourage him to take therapy (or even offer to attend couples therapy) if you think that might be helpful.
Whatever you do, donāt assume the worst. It sounds like heās got a place as near to you as humanly possible, so apart from the additional cost, there is little burden imposed by his decision to have a space of his own. It sounds like a bad omen, but I urge you not to take it as one without listening to his reasoning and seeing whether it actually works out.
So my guess is he has someone on the side and doesnāt want to get a divorce from you because what if it doesnāt work out? Sounds like he wants his cake and eat it too! Donāt take second place!
Separate is not helping red flag together is always better is better sending your prayers and hugs
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The burden is your during the week and 8 he wants to play house on the weekends???
Tell him to grow upā¦
He is letting you down gently
OPEN YOUR EYES
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My friends parents always had separate houses and have been together for 20 yearsā¦it works for them
I think this could work, but only you know the ultimate answer deep down. Donāt listen to all the negativity on this post and the accusations of him cheatingā¦NOBODY here knows yāallās marriage like you and him.
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Sounds like the perfect relationship to me 
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We only no half of the story yet we already think its over he has another woman etc we all deal with things our own way ā¦ maybe textd him with a message about how u 1st met how u felt how he felt then go to when the kids were born to now both share ur feelings ā¦ take him on a date organise it and say we go out at wotever time be ready Iāll get u then theubthe night say ur turn next month see if he does it ā¦ fingers crossed he does and u can still stay married and he comes home x
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How is his mental health? Sometimes they need the time away to try to find the root of it! Itās such an uncertain world at the moment, even I sometimes donāt know where I standā¦only trying to the best mum and grandy to my beautiful children and grandbabies
Sounds like he wants his cake and eat it too. Get that divorce. Let him pay child support. Your kids shouldnāt have to suffer due to financial stress and the bouncing back & forth.
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Wow !! What a convenience for him not fair for anyone in the family ā¦ problems you work on them not runā¦ lots to think about !!!
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Omg thatās my dream marriage 
just do therapy and be open to his needs, maybe life is getting on top of him and he needs to work on himself to come back together again. Donāt hate him for doing the right thing for him, get help for both of you and work together to bring it back.
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Iām so sorry , firstly wow what an opportunity for you to tap back in to you and what you want
Itās your turn to shine
Iāve found when your really happy with who you are others want to be around you and at the end of the day if your happy to be you it doesnāt matter who is there
Best of luck now go out and kick goals
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Sounds like he has another woman in his life, and heās testing the waters ā¦
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you look after the house and the kids and ill just come play happy families and enjoy the pleasures on the weekendā¦
no way!!!
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Why would he waste $$ for a separate home when those $$ could have been well spent on the kids. Something is def. off, he is hiding something or give him a space for a month or so and see if that will resolve ur issue.
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He has a plan! Heās not coming back. Sorry
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ā¦heās playing youā¦ he most likely has another girl and another family or one on the way. He wants to deal with yall when he feels like it. The married life isnt what he wants anymore. And instead of telling you, heās playing games to keep you confused so youāre easier to control. He wants you to be faithful to him while he spreads his seed all over town. Iām sorry honey, I really am. This is a pain I would not want anyone else to feel. Get a divorce, go no contact if possible. He will conveniently want to talk about to kids or some crap. Thatās all it is. Get tested.
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To me it sounds as if he is draining the savings before asking for a divorceā¦ Thatās just me though. Only you know if something is off about this situation
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He is interested in someone else.He is not sure,he is taken care of himself,you better take care of you and the kids.Praying God will reveal it to you.Iam sorry.
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It sounds like he has moved on and aināt man enough to tell youā¦ā¦
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He just up and left without discussing it. He sounds very selfish. Who knows what normal is these days however not just cause this is not the norm for most marriages, it is extremely disrespectful to you and the children until he decides what he wants? Really? I would really start seeking therapy for you and the kids. Iām so sorry but donāt take him back.
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Get rid of this narcissistic selfish POS! He leaves you with the kids because he needs space! F No!! Let him pay child support and find yourself a real man because this guy is still a little boy!!
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Get out now, and the BOY needs to start paying child support
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If heās eating up your savings account, thatās just wrong!
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Thereās a lot of married people who love each other but are better off living in different homes. It works for them. They still do things together , dates , vacation etc. Still have sex. But donāt live together. It works for some people.
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So heās off doing god knows what and you are at home raising his children. Simple he wants his freedom,but play house. Donāt bother with that heās happy doing his own thing you do the same. He knows if he divorces you he has to pay child support and maintenance itās cheaper from him to play house then get to be free.
Sorry, but it doesnāt work. Sounds like there is someone else. You need to move on. Get divorce, make him pay child support and alimony. ( if u arenāt working) Also remember u r entitled to 1/2 his retirement if you donāt remarry.
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He is just not sure about the other woman yet so heās playing it safe until heās sure about her if his plans fail then he has you for rebound, I would divorce his ass
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Iād check his phone it sounds like heās talking to someone honestly
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I believe they canā¦prior to marriage. In this caseā¦something or someone else is on his agenda. Probably is keeping things on the down low about his true intentions and feelings to keep the peace. This definitely would raise my eyebrows to a bit of distrust and sneaky stuff. He is hurting the family by walking out like that. You are the one whos going to suffer. Kids too! Marriage isnt about revolving doors and putting the other in a " single but married" lifestyle. Gotta think about you and your future because i dont think he is. He wants his cake and eat it too crapā¦ah hell to the no in my book!
He needs to shit or get off the pot!Otherwise itās BYE BYE āexā husband! DO NOT put up with that crap for 1 minute! If he loved you like he says he does, he would not have moved. He wants his cake and wants to eat it too. Get an attorney and start the proceedings. He will do this again to you if you allow it to happen. Heās very transparent. Ugghh
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Ok my personal opinion is signing a lease is more of a permanent move. It sounds like heās leaving you with all the child responsibilities during the week so he can have the best of both worlds.id start to move on and 1 of 2 things will happen. He will either realise he should have never left or he made the right decision. Either way you need to do you x
Would he be willing to work on it if you had moved out, leaving him to care for the kids?
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Sorry love, you donāt leave the situation you wanna work out. Looks like heās just making it easier to adjust with when itās over.
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Sounds like you havenāt set boundaries. He gets to decide the terms of the marriage. What we permit, we promote! Either youāre together or not. You and the kids are the only ones getting the short end of the stick.
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Living apart these days seem the normal. Some need there own space.
Prayers honey. But he is probably got someone he is test driving and hanging onto you in case it doesnāt work out. Start stashing money in cash. As much as you can
Had this exact thing happen last year, sorry sweety but your getting played.
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