Do her mother’s day the week before…Otherwise find something you want to do on your day if your husband won’t do for you.dont stay home… you must have friends you don’t see regularly…but plan your own day…don’t sit home.
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Pick an alternative date for your mother’s day? I know it’s not ideal. Nothing is. You’ll be her one day too.
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You didn’t do it wrong, your husband is being an…not for me to say, but you have a right to your day. He sounds like mama’s boy.
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I usually celebrate Mothers day with my mom on SATURDAY when I’m the daughter. Sunday, I’m the mother. Or vice versa. Hopefully your kids appreciate you 365 and 24/7.
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Ask your husband how he sees your role in his family. Of he does not state you’re his wife and your children’s mother , then I would suggest counseling.
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I am flexible about when my sons and their wives celebrate Mother’s Day with me. Too bad your MIL is so greedy.
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I offered him mother or the marriage. We went to counselling. Looking back over almost 40 years I would do things my way. Not expect anything for mothers day , but would do for myself what I would like him to have done for me. One can only control another no one , but oneself . So do exactly what suits you and give your mother in law space. MIL went to one therapy session and the therapist said I should move on from her . We are still married and it’s much easier since MIL died last year.
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My daughter-in-laws separate the day between breakfast for them, lunch for her mom and dinner for me… if they cant make it we organise another Sunday in lieu and make it a big deal
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My kids take me somewhere even if it’s not on the day. We went to dinner on Saturday night so they could spend Sunday with their partners parents. It doesn’t phase me but I’m lucky to have had them all dote on me for mother’s day for a few years now. I hope it works out for you Xx
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why don’t you and your family designate another day for YOUR day and do what you mom in law wants on the other day…you don’t have to be celebrated on a specific day! Pick your own!!!
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We do parentals the day before and my own mothers day on the actual day of mothers day. There is no chance i would ever be without my children on mothers day.
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Maybe when you’re both calm, try having a conversation about how it makes you feel. Could you guys alternate each year? Could it be a conversation between everyone about where to go? Maybe establish some traditions. Ie: always meet at the same restaurant in the middle for lunch every mother’s day. Any special projects, they can do for her for her birthday. Then you have the evening for what you’d like to do.
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You’re not wrong. If you have to travel to see her what about celebrating with her on Saturday and you on Sunday for Mother’s Day?
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Your husband is being very selfish. All mums need sometime to ourselves or we go crazy. After all they are his kids too and he could look after them for 1 damn day. I bet Father’s Day is a different story!!! Sorry your having a hard time. Mums are rarely appreciated for all the hard work we do x
What will it hurt if you let him be a mamas boy for her for a day? You’ll have your freedom, peace & quiet, go spoil yourself because you know, only you know how to spoil you 
oh make sure he takes kids with him everytime he goes to mamas
My youngest daughter asked me if we could celebrate Mothers Day next week because on Mother’s Day she was with her sister and her mother in law.I can relate completely
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Good for you. You got sick of it, and you said so. In my house, we’ve never made a huge deal over mother’s day-make a card, say I love you, get a gift. But if my mother, or any other mother in the family said enough, I want nothing for mothers day, respecting her wish is the best thing you can do.
I love you Matthew Moore, the only thing you cared about for my first mother’s day was, me. I couldn’t be more lucky or wish for a better husband. Thank you for everything you do; not just for me but for our son also. You’re amazing and I’m so lucky to have someone who loves me and Luka so much. 
No you are definitely not in the wrong, what about your mum.
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Mother’s day is supposed to be a day showing that they cherish you, not about how often you see your kids. Your husband sounds like a mama’s boy who thinks mother’s day is about his mother exclusively because it’s probably always been that way. I would explain to him that this is supposed to be a day to cherish the hard work mothers put in for the year and appriciate that. This isn’t a pick one situaiton, Mother’s day is supposed to be about both of you. You aren’t wrong. If I were you, I would sit down with the husband and say “Look, I understand you want to go out of your way for your mother and I really appriciate that part of you. I don’t think we should ever stop appreciating her. However every year you disregard me for her on mother’s day, when for everybody else it’s about all the mothers in your life, including me, the MOTHER of your children. Every year for the past ___ years we have spent the entire mother’s day making her feel special. I want to feel special too, and I feel excluded and unapprciated when the whole day is about her. We can either share the day and make it about both of us, or make the day after mother’s day mine but I didn’t get what I wanted- because I wanted to share mother’s day and feel important too, and as my one and only husband, that is your job to make sure I feel appriciated when I express those feeling to you, just like I feel it’s my job to make you feel appreciated.” Now i’m a high maintenance gal who says what she wants straight out. Maybe that isn’t your style (maybe it is) but the way I see it, appriciating me isn’t negotiable if i’ve risked my life to birth your kids.
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My MIL made every Mothers day about her as well. I gave up and stopped meeting their demands.
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Your a mum why not organize something for yourself for the next one , And if your husband does not agree well that is something you will have to talk about , Just tell him that your a mum as well & would like a we bit of respect your not asking for much as it works both ways .
Split the time, you are the mother of his children and hopefully he will compromise . You have to take care of yourself . Happy Mother’s Day!!
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Absolutely NOT! Next year you plan what YOU want & either include your child or not depending on what YOU want. He can visit his mom on father’s day with your child or not…
So wrong…
Your turn will come. Right now is the time to teach your kids to honor and respect their elders, so they will in turn, have do the same for you. I’ve lived long enough to see history repeat itself.
I say next year you have every right to take YOUR kids and do whatever you want to do with them!!! If he doesn’t like it then to bloody bad!!! It’s your day and you do u Mumma !!!
We’ve done same thing. His Mom gets all 3 kids, my Mom gets 0. I’m more upset about that. This year I tried something a bit different. Asking my kids to help me around the house. Made me feel better, but yes pick a different day…Saturday? And give him $ for pizza next month.
Feel like your husband should be understanding as should his mom. For the people saying ‘it’s a made up holiday’ and you’re immature… they can mind their own business. It isn’t “made up” when she wants something sooo f that.
Your husband needs to support you as his partner… that doesn’t mean he loves his mother less… his mom should understand that he has his own family now. He needs to make a separate time to celebrate her. There’s always her birthday and grandparents day.
She needs to take over grandparents day and leave Mother’s Day for you. Should have happened 6 years ago honestly. Your husband should send some flowers and maybe video chat her, but most of his attention should be for you on Mother’s Day.
Though, we don’t celebrate days as they are supposed to be celebrated. My husband explained our kids how to wish me the day and what mother actually is,
… he wished his mother likewise
She’s had her turn! It’s now time for you to be a Mother and celebrate too. You’ve got a year to think this thru. Perhaps talk to your hubby and tell him you want and deserve to be celebrated too. Maybe his mother could come to you. Leave it a few weeks then have a bit of a chat, then again a bit closer to the time.
Yes, you are perfectly entitled to want your own Mother’s Day.
My parents and his parents lived in the same town so we tried to spend a little time in both places but it didn’t matter. One or the other always felt we spent more time at the other house. I refused to do that to my kids. They do their best to split their time and I appreciate that effort! My son in laws parents are the reason he is such a good husband and father and son in law! They deserve his love and attention.
Hell no you are not wrong. There is nothing wrong with them doing something for their mom but they to do something for the moms since they are to little. I’m grateful my husband had our three sons get me stuff for Christmas and birthdays plus mother’s day
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Not wrong! As long as you are ok with being alone. I think that he should see his mom and give you what you want too. If its a toss up then maybe it could be her day on Saturday. She’s had enough Sundays. Lol. But never enough mother’s days.
He should just split the day between you both since you are both the main ladies of his life. Like he can take you out to breakfast, give a card, crafts from the kids, and a gift card to get nails done, then he can go and plant trees with his mom and go to dinner or whatever. At the end of the day everyone would be happy. Its not that hard. He just needs to plan the day better and he sucks at it.
My husband does nothing for me for mother’s day. He says I am not his mother.
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I think your issues are more about your marriage and your own need to compete with your MIL. I dont hear anything about anything other than your concerns about the time your husband spends with his mother on her birthday and Mothers Day which is 363 days less than he is with you and your family. You should cherish this man, and appreciate his devotion. If you do, it will be blessed upon you one day as a mother. Take a deep breath and realize than you never get a day off from motherhood. Those who honor and respect our elders are good people who appreciate that. Chances are, you have a really good husband. Just sayin. I have one too. I wish I had known his Mom, as she raised an awesome son.
I celebrate the women who have made me a Grandma…my two oldest daughters just as I celebrate my son in laws and ex-husband. They in turn celebrate me also, it our reminder to appreciate the role we live. I can’t imagine any other way or thinking its all about me. I’m so sorry for how your husband,
Parents and in laws treat you is your child’s example and experience.
The mother in law won’t be around forever, just remember that 
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Good for you ! I admire your guts ! They have Gino we are unpaid maids at their beck and call. I have stopped doing this along time ago ! Now Igo where Ivwant see whom I want ! Darent even ask me or question me anymore
Its not a mattet of right or wrong. Its a matter of asking for what you need. Life is always compromises.
I think your husband is being very selfish I know it’s his mom but he needs to think about you too he needs to ask what you would like to do on that day so his mom can come and celebrate with you and enjoy what you want to do I think that would be fair one year you and one year her
Our kids do breckie and presents at home with their families then one mil for lunch and a few hrs relaxing then dinner at the other mil all happy then. There will come a time that you will be the mil. Just think about how you would like to be treated when that time comes
I think my son’s wife’s should have a special day to their self. Then Maybe have some time in the evening , visit their mom…or even the day before or afterwards…
If your parents are still with us, on mom’s day go visit your mom and on Father’s day go spend it with your dad… Let him do the same with his parents etc… Once your kids are older they will spoil you… For now just be patient and don’t stress or fight about it.
Here’s the thing. Mother’s Day is one of many days that are nationally recognized because we’re a culture that is inequitable. These commemorative days in general are advocated for to bring awareness to unseen/undervalued populations. That’s how they came to be. Because we don’t know how to honor each other day by day, we need a specific purposeful day. So everyone’s interpretation of these days and what feels good to them is personal and individual.
That said, it seems to me that the point of every day, but especially these commemorative days, should be to honor those who they’re built around. For Mother’s Day, that means you too. That means what you want should matter. That means figuring it out together. You expressed something you want and need. Loving you means wanting to honor that.
You did nothing wrong. You get to exist.
AND - If his mother or him or anyone else wants to see and engage in a closer relationship with each other, they have every single other day of the year to do that. It’s not as if this is the only day she’s allowed to see them. She can see her children whenever she wants. That has nothing to do with you.
And frankly. Why wouldn’t YOUR family want to spend quality time celebrating with YOU?
Woof. Sorry, I got outraged for you. But you know best the dynamics of your relationships. Just honor what you’re feeling. Everybody deserves that.
You are NOT wrong! Keep standing up for yourself. I hope your husband will learn and understand you deserve Mother’s Day.
Your husband was very inconsiderate of you. His mother should be more understanding and not be so demanding of her married son. Hang in there!
Grrrr this happened to me for yrs and I just straight up told her what I wanted to do for my mother’s day and for my mamas mothers day same thing. It was simple cut and dry and replanned. Now my mothers been gone for almost 2 yrs and I stay home and no one asks y so it worked out. They can go see gma another day.
As an introvert and bc of some other things covid holidays have been just what I wanted. Just my family at home in our house. I don’t mean that to sound bad but like you said, you finally got the day to yourself. There is nothing wrong with that. There just isn’t.
Good for you stand up for yourself. Your husband is selfish and just plain wrong. You teach people how you want to be treated and that was just plain abusive.
Heck i dont go to some family gatherings just to take a brake from everyone in the house. I can relate
3 grown kids here. My Mother’s Day were like that. Until I told him… take the kids and Go to your mom’s! I am fine doing my own thing and honestly I would get up and head out before they even get up! Mother’s Day is NOT about kids folks. So get that out of your head. It’s supposed to be about the mother. So do what she/you wants. Also not what the hubby wants to do either! He has Father’s Day. Now on Father’s Day you do the same. I would pop over to my moms for a few but I was out by 10am doing what I wanted to do. Honestly when I am a grandma I will probably grab the kids myself! Be selfish.
Fuck no your not. Next time take you and you child and rent a cabin by a lake for the weekend. Tell him by I’ll see you on Monday I hope you have fun. Enjoy your life stop doing and worrying about others. It’s you and you child.
P.S. HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY BEAUTIFUL!!!
the kids should have stayed with you! They are not her children, if her son wants to only show respect to one mom, then so be it, go but your children should not go see her on mothers day…ever. She is not their mother.
I agree with Colleen Kippes Zinck and Dawn Kippes. Your mother in law is selfish, and sounds like she could give a crap what you want. Time for your husband to grow up.
Well i would not have tolerated his Way off treating you. You Leth him doormat you, why?
I would not have made him dinner, washed his chlothes or speaked to him, before he had apologized. And farthers day would be cancelled. Happy wife happy life
Id advise that you sit down with your husband/partner and come to a compromise… im not sure if your mom stil living but i will include her for examples…
What id you had alternating years. Lets say
2022 is your mothersdag. You guys hang as a famiky at home or do something.
2023 is your mother in law’s day. You drive up to her and spend the day with her.
And then 2024 is your mother’s day. And you spend it with her…
Its how we wil spend our christmasses with my family and the inlaws… our very firat christmas as married couple was on our honeymoon. This year will be at my inlaws… next year at my mums… so it really is all about compromise… and to talk it out as adults…
And mothersday is not about “you see your children everyday…” its about thanking yoy as a mom for everything you do. And youd like to have a special day too. I mean what do you do for fathersday every year?
Mothers day is a nonsense, an excuse to only do one good deed a year or buy a present. Be considerate for 365 days of the year.
Give ur mil the day before my kids are parents & both my ex & I do fathers/mothers day the day before so they can have the day to be spoilt as we were when they were little
You are not a mother to your husband. And ultimately- the day is about mothers and children. Not about mothers and husbands to their joint children.
No but you’re wrong for letting it go on for 6 years. If you’ve never stood up to him, stood up for yourself before, nows the time to start. Stand your ground. If you have to compromise, try every other year.
He should acknowledge his mom of course but you are his wife and now you should come first and he should be making it about your day , he leaves his mom and should cleave to his wife.
Not a very giving MIL. There would be a give and take…were it my marriage.
No. Not wrong. She had all her mother’s days when he was little. It’s your turn. What if she outlived you and you never get one?
You should both be celebrated. It shouldn’t be all about her or you. Split it up. MIL on Sat an you should definitely have Sun.
Selfish MIL and Selfish husband, I rather stay home and pamper myself than to have her be treated like a Queen while no one acknowledge me
Can’t believe the amount of self motivated comments here can nobody think beyond their own needs
I think something wrong with your mother-in-law!
Get the book, We Do. Read it together with your husband and revamp your marriage.
Quit being selfish, be the bigger person and just go with a smile on your face, you can do your Mother’s Day the day before.
My husband always told people I’m not his mother…So I never got anything
Make father’s day only about your dad or his!! I know it’s very tit for tat but sometimes people need to be shown by example!!
I would sit down and have a serious conversation with her. It might not go as she would rather.
Why do we even have a mothers day? Fathers day, bull shenanigans… every day is good day to celebrate 
…
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No you are absolutely not wrong! And your husband in some way should celebrate you! Maybe you could have her day on Saturday and yours on Sunday next year.
You’re definitely not wrong. This day isn’t only for his mother. She isn’t gods gift to the world. It’s for all mothers and you’re the mother of HIS kids. He should be asking YOU where YOU want to go for Mother’s Day.
A mom’s children celebrate Mothers Day with her. When it’s wife’s day or Valentine’s Day, it’s for you and your husband.
Maybe plan on Saturday for one of you and Sunday for the other…that way you both get a day
I guess just be happy you still have your and your partners mom’s. My mom died when I was 8. My husbands mom is estranged &a career alcoholic. Sometimes things just work out how they do, ever changing… You can always speak up if things don’t improve for you…
When you kids are older then they will give you the mother’s day that you want…
What about your mother ?
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Fair enough but next time, Instead of pizza get a babysitter and party all night long with the girlfriends.
What about your mom?
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Oh boy. Your kids will hopefully treat you like the queen you are to them.
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The guy who made me a mother over 3 years ago and LIVES WITH ME hasn’t done ANYTHING for me for mother’s day, let alone said the WORDS HAPPY MOTHERS DAY. Count yourself lucky.
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Do what works for you going forward and do not feel bad because you deserve some happiness. All the best and live life to the fullest.
Totally not in the wrong. Your hubby is
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A mother that birthed him is not more important than the mother that birthed his children, that’s All I gotta say, all mothers should be celebrated not only Mother’s Day but everyday and he should make an effort to make you feel loved on even a single day that matters to you because it matters to you
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Divorce him…if he cant or won’t celebrate you as the mother if his child like he celebrates his mother DIVORCE HIM
Celebrate the whole family♡ Hubby needs to do something special for you… at the event♡
Have the kids participate…these days will not last…enjoy…make precious memories♡
oh for heaven’s sake, just do mothers day for you on the saturday and for her on the sunday or vice versa.
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You’re in the right and hubby needs to grow up.
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Grow a back bone and put your foot down.
Organise a day for YOU. If MIL and hubby don’t like it well Tough Titties!!
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He is so very inconsiderate to you!!! Wow!!!
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A lot of times we celebrate a holiday on a different day
No you are not wrong. Good for you for taking a stand. Thankful thats one day I dont have to fight my mil over.
you should have went out for lunch…got your hair done…mani/pedi…shopping…and gone to see a movie… Enjoyed your day by yourself at least.
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Be really good to have your own Mother’s Day the week before, but if you really don’t want to do all that travelling and go to her Mother’s Day then don’t do it.
It is your Mother’s Day and if you feel like having it at home by yourself, and pampering yourself at a spa or something then go ahead.
It does sound very one-sided to me and unfair.
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wow, your husband completely sucks. when you can, divorce him.