Why was the door closed when he was showering? (like im sure you guys are comfortable enough with nudity by 6months) If it wasn’t locked I would have gone in and said you wanted to brush your hair. Then he would have to explain why he had the shower running while sitting on the toilet 
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You found yourself a real odd ball. Run girlfriend run.
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How big does your red flag have to be? Really? Why are you even still hanging around. Echoing the masses, “RUN”!!!
After thought, why do you feel you deserve THIS type of relationship may be a better question…
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I’ve been with a man like that, they don’t change. Tried the foreplay shower bit too. They won’t do it. It’s a sign of something out of place and not in a good way. I suggest you move on. For your safety.
Offer to take a shower with him say I will scrub your back if you scrub mine tell him your trying to be romantic in the shower cause y’all never showered together before so you want him in there with you scrub his hair for him it sounds to me this guy is suffering from depression or anxiety of some kind
You can’t change him…not sure how this isn’t a deal breaker for you…but to each their own
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Surprise him with new cloths and Buy some deodorant and shampoo and conditioner all together not just shampoo and conditioner by itself and giving it to them that could be an insult but as a gift get them clothes with it maybe a fresh new towel set with rags
That sounds like depression my friend and it is well established!
Be mindful of how you approach this subject, sounds like he maybe well aware of his hygiene to but maybe lacks the motivation or drive to complete such a task.
Look up the spoon theory!
(Unfortunately it wouldn’t let me post the image)
I would just be honest and say I know you’re not washing your ass and you smell. He might be a little offended but from my experience people beat around the bush to much and some people you can’t do that with you gotta give them the cold hard truth.
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Cleanliness is really important. Just be honest with him and let the chips fall where they may
Oh no . If he can’t be trusted to put his self-care and hygiene as some basic priority of self -worth then I say walk away. Or ask if there was some traumatic event that prevents him from wanting to shower, wear clean clothes and keep up with the basics.
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Honey, is this what you want to live with for the next 60 years??? Think about it hard!! You will never change him. If you put up with his lack of hygiene, what will be the next thing he refuses to do??? Think hard, my dear. You want a man who respects you enough to make himself attractive for you AND himself!!! This man respects no one. Be careful!!! Don’t try to change him. Dump him in the heap he’s created for himself!!!
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I don’t like a man with dirty nails much more a whole dirty body. I can’t do it.
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Sounds like your dating my sisters man. 
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How about inviting him into the shower with you? And offer to wash him and he washes you.
If that doesn’t work you might tactfully tell he doesn’t smell sexy.
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How about inviting him Into your shower? For some sexy time?
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I think it depends on what you’re willing to put up with. I suggest discreetly talking to friends or family asking if there’s a bigger issue involved, some past trauma or depression. If it’s just that hygiene’s not a priority for him there might not be a positive solution.
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Maybe he’s hydrophobic…? It’s important to address that he may have a belief system built up to negate proper hygiene. It could be something deep that affected him. For me personally, I’d go out and buy new clothes, freshen up and shave everyday because it would tell the one I love that I care about myself and take care of me. And I’m sure she appreciates it.
I’ve had a few years there where my personal hygiene wasn’t the best due to depression, and once I got diagnosed with schizo affective disorder it spiraled down worse. So I’d worry about his mental well being more that his hygiene at the moment. I see people looking at this focusing on hygiene and how basic it is. Mental illness prevents people from doing even the most basic things necessary for survival.
Sounds like theres mold in his soap or thats just how it smells
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I see plenty of people saying it but I’ll say it too, I have gone thru the same thing I still struggle with it, it probably is a form of depression or serious stress I would suggest couples therapy and the therapist will catch on to the small things and realize he has a problem and work on it. Mine usually is just a overwhelmed feeling from all the daily tasks I have so try to help him do the small things like washing dishes and doing laundry
honestly, a grown man who doesn’t maintain himself isn’t going to maintain a healthy relationship either. move on before you get too invested.
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Please…!!! Throw out that man with the bucket & water! How the hell can it get better? He is an adult, doubt he will outgrow his lack of hygiene 
RUN!
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It sounds like he’s depressed. Have him listen or read Dr. Jordan Peterson podcast or books. He’s a clinical psychologist
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Invite him in the shower with you and give him a nice bath, do this constantly and you’ll both appreciate it, he should then get used to it when you tell him how good he smells after those bath.
Unless you want to parent a full gown adult, then walk away. If it’s depression, encourage seeking help. People are not rehabilitation for other people. There are trained professionals for that.
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I’ve heard of ppl being like allergic to the chlorine in the water… It might irritate his skin…maybe get a shower water filter x
If he doesn’t clean his body can you imagine his oral hygiene, it’s probably been years since he has seen a dentist and hygienist - I wouldn’t be kissing that mouth full of bacteria!!
Has he money to buy clothes?if yes go shopping with him.if money ok it may be he has mental health issues .I know someone who used to not wash ,it took mental health team to diagnose .talk gently about him loving himself ,taking care of himself to show that see what happens.if nothing surgest a doctor
Run, you can not fix him. Oh sure, he might change for a bit, but he’d hate it and as soon as you are not looking, he will be back to his old habits.
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Please be careful how you comment on this post as failure to take care of personal hygiene can often be a side effect of that person struggling with their own mental health. Do not be “judge mental” of him, but gently ask him if he is ok and would like to talk about anything that may be worrying him. Maybe arrange an activity to do together that you know he will enjoy and hopefully he will open up to you IF he is “struggling.” Show him some empathy and then maybe he will take more care of himself 
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Buy him a bottle of “Doc Jackson’s Noodle Restorer.”
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Someone once told me that whatever problem you find initially with your spouse courting and do not adress it will develop into bigger problems .Aďdress the problem with him now. if you cant tolerate the smell which is a big problem …you just leave now and move on…
I have a friend that did the same thing he would shower about once a week he would put his clothes out in the fresh air for the night then he would put them back on I believe he still does the same thing for him it’s a habit because his parents were the same way
He’s knob must smell when you have sex, tell the dirty sod, no more nookie unless he showers and washes daily
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I would have broken off with him the first week. Hygiene is number 1 in my list. I don’t you can retrain a man who does not want to change.
I would say nicely let’s take a shower together and we can wash each other. Make it fun. If he refuses, I would have to leave the relationship. I can see a few days but months , umm no
Yes when my son got sick bypolar he went through the same thing. This was when he was 18 now 43 he’s high functioning but he definitely has an under lining problem. Just for me I wouldn’t be able to deal with the odor
Sounds to me that he doesn’t want to hear what you have to say about his smell . So seems to me you have two options ,Deal with the way he smells or walk away ,stop trying to change him.
So I never had an problems with a stench from any exes, but with my last ex when it came to clothes, he needed a little help. Lol plus him working in the shop though did leave him smelly, but luckily he took care of that when he got home. But based off what I knew about him, I started looking at clothes online, asked him if he had any specific sports brand he likes. He was happy about it, he worked in a shop so had very minimal clothes that were not holy, or permanently grease stained. I didn’t make it a situation at all, just started taking it upon myself to surprise him with new clothes.
But to be honest, your dude may have some mental health issues to work on if he’s even faking taking a shower.
It’s the teenage sons tiny football pants for me.
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There has to be some sort of trauma related to this. He is aware of the problem because he got irritated when you gave him the body wash. Sit him down and ask him. Ablutophobia is the fear of bathing. Usually this occurs after something traumatic happened surrounding water. He certainly sounds like he’s worth your figuring this out. Start by meeting his parents, siblings. That interaction could show you a lot! Good luck!
Sounds like my 15 year old grandson. Something about soap and water intimidates them. I tell him to take a shower with soap or I’ll do it for him.
What future do you see when you can’t even hint to him to clean himself? The future is musty, smelly,grimy and nothing short of rotten (there’s no future) so leave while the door is open (now).
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Ewww, you have to just have a open, honest conversation with him. Personal hygiene is a big thing for me so we wouldn’t even have lasted that long. Good luck! Honesty is going to be the only possible solution here. Also, in the beginning when things are brand new we usually dress to impress. If he started the relationship being yucky, that’s not going to change!
His dirty penis is going to do horrible things to your vagina or give you UTIs. Bad hygiene is a no-go. Talk to him and ask why he doesn’t see hygiene as a priority and explain to him why it IS important to you. If you can’t reconcile this difference or come to an understanding/compromise then it will just become a larger issue down the road.
Girl run. If he went through the effort of pretending to shower when he could just as easily of actually showered he’s a lost cause. Why would you want a future with someone like that?
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Is this even real…how does anyone allow it to go that far…me personally I wouldn’t want to be in a relationship, we’re you’ve got to tell your significant other to a…ah…lemme put this gently…
WASH YA ASS!!!..
Ewww these comments are so gross. This is why our men are so emotionally stunted. Because rather than spread kindness to someone who’s probably going through something, y’all are calling him a science experiment and everything else. Men get depressed too. Men can be victims of trauma too.
Tell him “you’re stinkin”
Can’t hint or sugar coat it.
He’s obviously not taking the hint.
Give him time. Be a good friend to him until he opens up to you. You never know what’s in a person’s past so he could me scarred mentally or physically so wait till he’s ready. Hold off on intimacy until you’re both ready and then start showing together. Let him be himself so he’s comfortable and he will love you for your patience.
You better just haul ass from pig pen! You can call it trauma, depression, whatever da fux, but facts, he wanna stay stanky! Let him! It’s plain lazy, you need therapy? Get it. Whatever you gots to do to wash your nasty self.
I had a bf not be clean and I straight up said nope, you don’t get this… Until you wash all that! Bleh. Be honest, no one won from lying!
Walk away just walk away. You deserve better. Wd can’t change others to fit our life’s. Some people don’t want rescuing. As a mom of two girls that’s my advice. Pull that bandaid with one yang. Gods luck with your decision
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Address them by running away - personal hygiene is not only totally necessary but respectful of those we mix with. It won’t get any better - only worse and as for sitting on the toilet and running the shower water - well - unless he was using it before showering - what other ‘lies’ will he tell? Sorry to be pessimistic but it won’t get any better
girl throw the whole man away…how old is he 12? grown men don’t just not shower unless 1 of 2 reasons…#1 they’re in some type of band most likely rock which in that case that comes with the territory you knew what you signed up for so just spray some axe spray on him inconspicuously and go…or #2 he’s depressed in which case that’s a much deeper issue and he should speak to a professional so he’s more motivated to do regular things like showering
Ask him to go outside when its raining, lock the door and throw some soap
I’m sorry why are you still with this boy? I know that dirty D 
ain’t good enough to risk a wicked infection 
. You shouldn’t have to teach a grown man how to bathe or when to bathe.
Sounds like he may be too tired to take a shower when he gets off work. You may just have to be honest but not be mean. Like “Babe, I’m very attracted to you but when you don’t bathe, it throws me off”. Take it from there.
I’d run as fast as you can!
You can do better then that…
Tell him to Shower and clean up or hit the door.
That’s rediculous that you have to check up on a grown as man because he won’t shower…
My high school kids shower every day and I dont even need to tell them.
Girl get out now!!
Don’t. It only gets worse My stepfather bathe only a few times a year. it was bad for his skin. Also only changed his long johns once a week
Wow…you’re a better woman than I am…I could not get past the hygiene part. It seems you have done your part in being subtle and trying to encourage him lightly to bathe. Seeing as you like him a lot, Maybe as a last resort, spontaneously try to get him in the shower with you. 
Does he have autism? My stepson did that sort if thing so I had to actually make him take showers and check that he used soap and shampoo etc
Some people get depressed and don’t keep up with their daily routine and people don’t care when they are depressed
Some men just don’t hygiene very well, my husband same way with brushing his teeth, I’ve never put my tongue in his mouth because he has never brushed, although he will use mouth wash when I tell him his breath stinks like something dead, so yeah I get you!
He’s an adult. Find a time when his son is not home and let him know hey I want to discuss with you something I’ve noticed. Use “I feel” or “I’ve been worried about…” in your words. and let him know that you want to be there for him and be in a relationship with him. Be prepared for him to get defensive. Lack of hygiene usually has to do with a lack of self esteem or he thinks it’s pointless and boring (he was probably doing something he considers to be more fun on his phone when you looked under the door)
He most likely either has a severe depression problem or is doing some kind of drugs. Something is definitely wrong!
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I’m srry but how do u sleep with that I wouldn’t had lasted 6 months
While acknowledging that there can be psychological issues around hygiene and cleaning, this is a base-level litmus test for me. I would never keep a man around who couldn’t be bothered to keep himself clean and tidy. If he can’t do that much, how can I expect him to help me take care of a home we share (or, if I wanted them, children)?
On the social front, the one bit of dating advice I ever took from my mother is to never date someone who embarrassed me in public. My partner turning up to a social function - including a one-on-one date - with that kind of bedraggledness is absolutely embarrassing and unacceptable, especially since I am very hygienic and usually pretty well-dressed.
It’s possible he suffers from a psychological condition that interferes with this (like depression or trauma). Gently discuss this with him and ask how you can help.
But if it boils down to plain ol’ laziness, fam, you can do better.
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Leave, you could get some disease there is lots of men out there who needs some real love who will get all cleaned up to go out with you. Your just a piece he can get no one else wants him. 
This guy got a woman to be in a relationship with him… and she stayed for 6 months! Damn…
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He doesn’t like to shower, obviously. Be straight forward!
maybe you should resort to a long distance relationship until he gets help for his phobia. Try having a shower with him. and wash the guy up your self.
Sounds like he has some sort of mental illness or emotional trauma. You’re not his therapist though. He’s not less of a person, but if he’s not willing to help you help him, then there’s not much you can do. If he wants to be with you, confront the issue, see if he’ll go to therapy if you’ll go with him. Maybe leaving will make him see that he needs to work on himself first.
You need to rethink this. It will only go downhill from here
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Your future is pretty scary. If he is pretending to clean up now, just wait until he figures you and him are solid. He is on his best behaviour now.
You can’t. My roommate is filfty. Sleeps with dirty dished…just got him to clean the filter in ac window unit…1st time in w years.
Seriously. Red flags. Do you want your whole life collecting red flags. There is enough red flags in this situation. Why are you even asking these questions you know the answer. Don’t think you can change him.
He can lead a horse to water but you can’t make him drink ……. He’s set on his old ways tell him you want me take a freaking shower the right way
Does he have depression? Because a lot of people with depression tend to have a hard time with hygiene… i would try having a heart to heart with him
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So he’s pretending to shower and you’re peeking under the bathroom door?! This relationship is already based on lies and deception.
I have a friend that was in a similar situation. The guy even had psoriasis! She talked to him about the importance of good hygiene in her opinion and asked him why he didn’t take better care of himself as he was a handsome and desirable man in all other areas of life to her. He replied the women in his past life always accused him of cheating on them if he smelled good or cleaned himself up. If he left home ‘dirty’ and came back home ‘dirty’ then to them it meant he wasn’t cheating. So to have mental peace he chose to NOT be as clean as he preferred. She promised not to be jealous and He did start cleaning himself up, got help for the psoriasis and several years later they are still very happy together… including now married.
He could be extremely depressed… I myself went for years and years without bathing or brushing my teeth once or worrying about my hygiene at all. People who are depressed neglect taking care of themselves and it can manifest in a number of different ways. Have a heart to heart and just tell him he needs to start taking care of himself and that he can start with his hygiene. I’m sure he’s not unaware his hygiene isn’t good. Whatever you do don’t make a big stink about it or be rude about it. Shower with him if that’s something you’d be comfortable with. Wash his hair for him and show love.
and you’re still with this man? If he isn’t willing to take your what-I-thought-was-a-subtle-hint, things aren’t going to change. Run!
You are definitely obsessed with spying on him. You seem to be going to great lengths to secretly watch what he’s doing. Before all that I would have mentioned it to him.
My grandson has dyspraxia and is the same. Google dyspraxia and personal hygiene.
It sounds like depression, the main thing is to talk to him. Let him know you’re there for him if he needs you. Maybe he needs counciling. Or couples counseling could be a start. Good luck.
Honey if he won’t be clean now he most likely will remain the same . I speak from experience. They may clean up now and again.
Well. Only thing to do now. Slip into something sexy and lure him into the shower with you. If that doesn’t do it. He lost. 
Sounds like you have more of a problem than your musty-smelling boyfriend … How can any human put up with that kind of a person and still be a girlfriend… You are the one that needs help …Find yourself a nice clean cut well-rounded boyfriend … …If you have to get a boyfriend to shower - you are crazy! Makes me wonder how clean you are to be with him 6 months … You are bound to be smelly too …
What you see…ahh smell…is what you get. The issue will turn to resentment ( one ,either or both) if you make it an issue judging from the response you have received already.
Tell him straight up how you feel. It won’t work out if you don’t.
I dont know what to say but an unhygiene man really turns me off… cant image kissing a man that has not been brushing his teeth for days… im sorry for you…
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All of the answers you need are in the paragraph you wrote. Raise your standards in which people you want in your life. It’s the only thing that will teach him. Move on to something better.
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If you care about this guy you need to find out why he doesn’t take care of his hygiene and bluntly explain the things he needs to do. He might not realize how bad things are and/or has some philosophic or cultural reasons he’s not bathing often enough.
Are you dating my cousin? Lol he does this shit. I’d say you need to shower or we just can’t be, I can’t be with someone who doesn’t shower
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I would talk to him about it… but not in a “you stink and need to take better care of yourself” way… in more of a concerning manner… there are different reasons people do things like this and he may be fighting a battle no one knows about… try to get him to open up and talk to you then take it from there…
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I know someone that had a fiance in the same kind of situation. He would go 3 months no shower but did wear pitstick. She had to start taking showers with him for him to wash up. People have things in life whether it be depression, no motivation, they dont care or medical issues…idk if this helps or not. If he is worth it, then work on it.
If you still with him after 6 months him not bathing can’t be the problem, sounds like you both got issues or you don’t take frequent baths either.
Time to say Bye. Do you know that you could get terrible infections from him. It’s disgusting. If you want a clean boyfriend. This one is not for you.
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6 months together. So I’m going to assume you’ve been intimate. And I am blown away that you have proceeded to do so with him & his body in this condition. There’s underlying issues here. Mental health plays a huge role in personal hygiene. He needs help. And you can lead him to it.
Does he wash his teeth ? Or hands after the toilet and after nookie. You really shouldn’t have to beg a man to wash this will be one of many issues you will have to face if you stay with him. Ditch Mr Wiffy