Get in the shower with him and y’all have some fun and wash each other! Make it fun! No pressure. Make sure he is comfortable with it.
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He may suffer allergy from soaps,body wash, ask him for his clothes, undies wen he comes out, wash them, maybe he doesn’t have much
Can’t change a grown man they either stuck that way or will change on their own…if they want
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In my experience people don’t really change. They will do what you ask them to do and then simply revert back to their old ways when you become old news. (what I mean is, when the relationship is no longer new) if this man actually pretended to have a shower, but sat on the toilet instead…there is no hope, he is crazy and that crazy will eventually show it’s ugly head, it’s really only a matter of time. The reason you like him is because he is showing you only the part of him that he chooses to currently. Rather just say to him straight forwardly that you cannot be in a relationship with someone with poor hygiene. Tell him that you are aware that he doesn’t like showering and that this does not work for you. He must rather find someone else who doesn’t mind because you most certainly do.
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He might have Ablutophobia. It’s more common in females. But dam if you plan on being with him… be honest. Ask why he lacks in bathing etc. Some people think they should bathe once a week. Could be how he was raised or perhaps trauma with water growing up. But seriously talk to your partner. Calm, king and compassionate conversation.
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That is disgusting …just tell him and if he doesn’t like it give him the suitcase…sorry love no!! men will be in bed with me smelling 
The fact that she’s peaking under the door bathroom… 
I would say it directly and if he gets offended, so be it.
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Autism spectrum? That’s what all signs are pointing too
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You didn’t know this when you first met him? And you fell in love with him. Sounds like you like it
Get in the shower with him!! Scrub that scrub . .lol
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Asked him to shower with u an u bath him or tell him no sex till he baths
Think you need to find a new boyfriend
Girl run! Like Forrest Gump run, ASAP.
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I would be gone in five minutes …gag !!
spice it up, maybe? ask him to come shower with you 
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Be direct and say it like it is……
six months and you are still with him?
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Sounds like he’s trying to run you off!
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Y’all had sex?!?! God I just imagine the smell of dirty ball sweat thinking about this man
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Get rid of … smell bag 
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I would be straight up and tell him to wash his behind. How can u see a future with someone you can’t even have sex with cause his ass stinks? Can’t even imagine what that sex life is like
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Shower with him. Works with mine. 
I can’t imagine sleeping with a dirty man, dirty genitals and all! He won’t change, just leave
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Sounds like he’s lazy with the hygiene. Mother probably had to force him. I’d have to leave this one alone. There is no way correcting him on this issue.
Speaking from experience, the hygiene issue will never change. I was with a guy 3 years and he had horrible hygiene and he was such a baby he couldn’t clip his own nails “tHe NoIsE hUrT hIs EaRs”. But when he scratched me in the middle of the night and ended up having more gunk under his nails than the damn stove he cooked on at work (he was a cook in a restaurant) I made him put headphones on and clipped them fuckers myself. He was disgusting. And we would actually fight about it. We slept in the same bed and I really didn’t like sleeping next to stink.
We broke up and I met the guy I am married to and he takes alot of pride into his hygiene and looks, he doesn’t like being gross. So in my experience, if the hygiene needs aren’t there in the beginning they will never be there. Don’t lower standards good personal hygiene is a normal request in relationships. Normal people wanna smell good for their significant other 
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Oh no. At his age you not going to change him. If anything it will get worse . Nee siesa
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People are harsh. Maybe he has some psychological issue making him weird about showers. Id def address it but not in an insultibg way. U have every right to want someone you love to take care of themselves… does he have depression or anxiety disorders?
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He sounds like he could be depressed or he just doesnt care about hygiene I personally couldn’t be with a person who refuses to shower
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Oh girl no lol. How do you sleep with someone like that? You shouldn’t have to convince a grown man to clean himself.
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I would ask him if he took a shit today. If he says yes then tell him to get in the shower and wash that dirty funky smelling ass
This can be a defensive mechanism carried over from childhood after sexual assault.
To literally PRETEND to shower, this isn’t depression alone IMO. This is something foster kids do.
If he is this nasty now and you’re not even serious imagine how bad it will be once he’s comfortable
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Does he have mental illness ? Maybe his bathing issue is a side effect from something else. He may need the kind of help you can’t provide.
The only way that will actually get through, Tell him, he needs to shower more, he has a bad odor.
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LOL I will just go to Bath and Bodyworks buy him whatever one smells the best get him the shower gel the lotion everything they have maybe even the room spray LOL tell him that it smells super good and you absolutely go crazy over the smell 
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Say “you need to take a shower.” Problem solved
Eww… no stinky men…sounds like a mental issue as well.
Sounds like he grew up with bare min. He sees no issue, no fuss guy
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Eww. And to think that dirty ass peen/fingers/mouth will go in u.
Noooo girl u gone get sick
I would straight up tell him he stinks and needs to shower.
Uhm. Don’t be surprised if you end up getting vaginal
Infections
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i hope yall not doing the nasty without protection cuz your PH balance about to be all kinds of messed up and you’ll be getting bacterial infections
Tell him the truth ! And if things don’t change leave …
Two words: Lost Cause
You see what you get
Is he autistic possibly?
you cannot teach him how to live
It’s a no for me. He’s just disgusting! And I bet his wee wee smells too🤮girl run
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Cherelle Elizabeth McShera
Leave him be …move on!
He went as far as to sit on the toilet with the shower on to lie??? That’s dîsgusting
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The hygiene thing could be a mental thing. Does he have depression? It could be affecting him that way. If not, you need to have a talk with him about it. But you can’t make a future with a man who doesn’t take hygiene seriously. Especially when it comes to your health and potentially having children and teaching them personal hygiene.
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Throw a bucket of water at him when he gets close…
Please don’t take this seriously I’m kidding
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Need to stop hinting at it and be direct.
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Tell him straight, you won’t have sex with a man that doesn’t shower. Tell him you really like him but he has to look after himself.
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Tell him you won’t cook dinna should work don’t mess with a man’s food haha 
Hope all works out 
You have to be direct and tell him it affects your relationship. 
Dana Jade might get some good advice here
Tell him straight guys don’t do hints be direct.
Bahhahaha Sy Clancy do I need to get some hints and tips
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Bonnie Lyn Shepard wtf
He may be depressed. When people have chronic depression, hygiene goes in the trash. I’m surprised at the lack of knowledge of this. Obviously something is going on in his head and he is no less a man if it is. Don’t just kick him to the curb, try to figure out what is going on. He acted like he was taking a shower because he was probably just trying to get you off his back. This is pribably mental health issue and he is not trash. Don’t listen to some of these people who don’t understand mental illness. Now if he doesn’t want to or refuses to get help, then think about leaving him.
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Tell crusty he stinks and needs some good fitting attractive clothes. It isnt that hard dude, you won’t turn into smoke when the soap and water hits your skin! Keep the lid on that cookie jar doll, do not give at ALL until he engages in a talk about how much you mean to him and be firm and loud about the FUNK!
Girl, you will be miserable waiting for McNasty to come clean, keep at him on a regular basis if he slides back into the stickies, you have a decision to make and I wish you success!
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I’m a dude and I can’t NOT shower. Trust me. You can do better then that.
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That’s really too bad… be very blunt with him, & tell him you have noticed. Ask him if there is a reason he doesn’t do it. It’s worrisome at any age really!
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Who cares about his hygiene….“changed his jogging pants into his teenage sons tiny football pants”
This dudes a legend
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Hold up he faked a whole ass shower and we still talking about working shit out. Homie apparently needs to wash more than his ass if at this point. His lack of hygiene issues is not only gross but a major taboo for you and yours. Like da fuck …ain’t no way imma let some no ass washing old dust rag having ass homie smash shit without washing dat ass first. I’d detox my own damn box just for principal cause hell nah
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Just leave the man-baby, you’re going to end up his mother and I’m guessing you’d rather a partner.
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Reading this, I feel as though there is an underlying issue. Something is up, I would be extremely mindful when entering conversation with him in regards to showering and his clothing. There might be some trauma he has experienced around this.
Do you know much about his upbringing?
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Is not the only one. He is ill! Before thinking to have a life together please convince him to consult a doctor. Good luck!
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An honest and straightforward conversation. “ i noticed you haven’t used the soap i have you. Is it not a scent you like? Because, i really thought it smelled HOT! “ or even literally calling out what he is doing in the moment! “ i know you didn’t shower “ “ I’m not going to dinner with you like that” “ is there a reason you have an aversion to water”
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If he’s this dirty during the dating part, imagine the funk of marriage.
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You need to just flat out be honest and ask Why is it you can’t bathe often. Tell him how you feel and ask how you can help him get into a better hygiene habit. I mean, depression could EASILY be the answer for all this. Doesn’t make it okay, but I’m absolutely guilty of just not caring about myself when I’m super depressed.
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I have trauma surrounding water, and it was like pulling teeth to get me to shower or take a bath growing up, now as an adult, I still struggle, EVEN with therapy and working through the trauma. I am an every other day showerer now. But sometimes if my depression is really bad, I can go a week+ and I know that’s gross, but that’s mental illness. I’d talk to him about this, but do it in a very sensitive manner. My guess is there’s probably something more to the story.
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You’re not his parent and he is not a child but maybe shower with him occasionally… wash each other, make it sexual (if you have gone that far together). Otherwise be straight up with him. If it doesnt change, leave. That is pretty disgusting for the both of you.
(I get that people have phobias and stuff but hygiene and showering/bathing is essential)
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Is he depressed or have a history of depression because I know that when I’m depressed I have a hard time taking care of my hygiene.
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This man is battling demons inside his head he does not feel comfortable talking about with you. That’s his mistake not trusting you enough to not judge him but also yours at the same time. Don’t be too blunt but subtly let him know he can trust you with out judgment.
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That is a big sign of depression. Sometimes the depression is so bad that showing just isn’t a priority you just can’t be bothered so you sit there instead you don’t change you don’t care because what’s the point in caring about it. Talk to him about it. Let him know you are there for him and support him through it. It’s not always about “kicking someone to the curb” because they have problems if you see a future with this person try working together to fix the problem instead of running away from it.
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As much as it sounds gross, I do wonder if he’s struggling with something. Trauma and fear can manifest in many weird ways without him consciously realizing it.
I was in a very similar situation - I would only wash my hair because my scalp would be unbearably itchy, and wash my body very rarely. I’d only be in the shower for 3 minutes max. I’d also wear the same clothes over and over too.
I knew it was a problem. I hated it. I also hated myself for not even being able to shower. I also “pretended” to shower when someone would complain. Literally sit there, let the shower run and that’s it
Then one day during therapy it came to me - when I was little, my mother would always “discipline” me while she helped me bathe. Butt naked and wet, I’d get yelled at and hit. As I grew older and the toilet was becoming a “private” space, she would literally unlock the toilet door and hit me while i was in the shower. She didn’t let me lock the door at one point - said everybody knew I was in the shower and nobody would come in. She’d come screaming the moment she hears the lock click. She’d also peek at me on occasion while I shower to make sure I’m doing it “right”.
I literally did not even connect the dots and forgot any of that ever happened. It clicked, and I realised why I struggled to shower. I was terrified of being vulnerable. My brain has taught me that showering puts me in danger. I was in and out quickly because I didn’t want to be caught off guard.
Things are better since working through it - I now compromise by only taking a shower at night while everyone is asleep.
Talk to him about it. Be upfront. There shouldn’t be secrets like these if you want a future. 
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To be honest this would be a deal breaker for me. People’s hygiene habits are pretty much already established as an adult. I don’t see you being able to change that. I would also venture out to say that he probably doesn’t brush his teeth regularly either. This issue will not get any better & the more you bring it up the more likely he will resent it & the less likely he will change!!
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Nope. Life is too short to waste time on a man with poor hygiene. Tell him no more “relations” if he isn’t clean. That’s a yeast infection waiting to happen.
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Spray dry shampoo in his hair while he’s sleeping… But he has got to go. You can do better than that.
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You could just simply be honest and lay it out there for him. That’s what I’d do… Personally, if that didn’t change I’d breakup with him. I can’t deal with poor personal hygiene… no matter how cool I think you are.
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Gross… if you really love him and want to give him a chance… then straight up tell him that he needs to shower. This is basic. If he doesn’t immediately shape up I’d consider moving on
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Tell him you want to shower with him
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Wonder what the bed sheets look like. How do you sleep with something so nasty. Your going to get more than you bargain for. Run and don’t look back.
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My husband is autistic, and has issues with depression and anxiety-based comorbidities, as well as sensory issues the water often triggers, as does changing clothes frequently. Same problem with him.
You’re likely going to need the help of a therapist, with this one.
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Ummmm
How do u get naked with him??? Ick
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Just be honest with him. the make it sexual suggestions on here are cool and might even work for a little while but if you have to do that every time just to get him to smell decent it’s going to turn in to a chore for you vs something fun and romantic. God for bid y’all have children now you have to bathe the children and him plus yourself
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That could possibly be a sign of him being depressed
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You’re both adults, talk to him about it. Could be a deeper issue than what I see other people are saying, i.e. that he’s “lazy.”
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Ugh! I’m curious how you have intercourse with a partner that has a serious lack of hygiene! You need to be direct and rather blunt about his consistent stench! Apparently giving hints and going about it gently is not getting the message across! I wish you luck! 
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How did ya have the hanky panky with that Stanley stanky lol
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I know this perspective is supposed to come from the woman’s point of view but…what? That’s just disgusting. I can’t even imagine faking taking a shower. Dude, you rank. Scrub your underarms and giblets at the very least. Dang.
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Uhhh. Do you REALLY want to spend your entire remaining life with a man who won’t even use real soap for you?
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Kick his dirty ads to the curb
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Gurrrrl may i recommend you visualize someone cleaner in your future instead. If your future husband’s afraid of the shower now how do you think you’re gonna deal with him a year from now? Think longterm…how you plan on enjoying your sex life with this guy if he doesn’t want to clean himself?
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U would think his work would say something being he is a bartender! If u have noticed pretty sure customers would have noticed at the bar he works at! Pretty sure he wouldn’t wash the bed sheets then either ? is this really a question on what to do here? Lol
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I agree with all of the above, but just separately, please don’t be looking under the door when he’s in the bathroom. Whether he’s meant to be showing or not… that’s an invasion of his privacy, and 100% not ok.
You’re not his mum, you can be frustrated at his lack of hygiene, but that doesn’t mean you ‘check’ on him like that.
Try suggesting showering together? Make it fun/sexy and see if that helps?
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