ok I’m an old woman , and I use to give my children a good smack when they were out of control. Since parents became unable to smack unruly children , you see children running around out of control in places where they should sitting quietly… restaurants for instance . Bring back the wooden spoon ,
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Consistency is key!! Have a routine for every time she acts out. Whether it be taking to another room to calm down, and calm down activity (bubbles, coloring, snack, etc…) just a distraction to calm down and talk about feelings… it may not be successful the first few times but the more you do it the more they will catch on. Also, at 4 they are sponges and take in everything you say/do. They do a lot of repeating based on how you handle situations.
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I came across this one woman’s tiktok in early 2020 and she said she has set up a “thinking/calming zone” for her child. She basically has like this little corner of a room set up with books, a little floor pillow, some flash cards with names of feelings on them with pictures kind of describing them, coloring books, blocks. She said when kids act out, it’s because they don’t know how to tell you what they’re feeling. Whenever her toddler would respond in a negative way, she would ask them if they’d like to take a few moments in the calm zone. The child can sit and relax, so to speak, which would take them out of whatever overwhelming feeling they were feeling. We started doing that with our daughter last year, she just turned 4, so she was 3. It works. If she’s upset, she’ll just go into her room, close the door, and look at books. Once she’s regrouped herself, she’ll come out, I’ll ask her if she wants a hug (which she normally does) and I’ll ask her what made her so upset. It’s really helped.
(I know not every child will respond to this, but not everyone wants to spank their children.) I second the comment to ruling out physical or mental health. My other son is on the spectrum, and when he was younger, if he was overwhelmed he would act out. I’m absolutely not saying that’s what it is, just speaking to my own personal experiences.
Good luck.
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If ypur daughter is kicking your dude in the nuts, you might want to investigate how she knows to do that…
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When my kid acts out I send her to the room and let her sit in there until she calms down . I talk with her about her actions then have her sit around me until I allow her to leave and play. Idk some methods work but that did for me.
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Put her in time out immediately. As many times as it takes every time she acts up.
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Trying spanking her butt. That worked when I was growing up. Worked on my kids when they were growing up. Stop this corner crap. Your the parent not the kids friend.
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This is what my 3 year old is like.
He has Glue Ear and is awaiting speech therapy sessions.
We’ve been told it’s more than likely frustration.
I’m also awaiting a blood test just to rule anything else out. Once we’ve had an up to date ear check and have his blood results my health visitor has said we’ll then start to look at behaviour disorders.
Just reach out for the available help and don’t blame yourself.
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Maybe have her tested for sensory processing disorder by an occupational therapist or someone. This sounds like more than your typical 4-year-old behavior. There’s a lot of anger there. She may have something going on that she just doesn’t know how to handle. 
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Ya when I was was a lil kid we didn’t act like that at all my mawmaw would have tore that ass up you ‘ve let her get away with it too long
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Omg I can’t believe how many people are telling you that harming your 4 year old is the right thing to do!!! Pleeeeease don’t listen to them, at 4 years old this is developmentally normal. That doesn’t make it any easier to cope with but she’s so young! I would just try to do “time ins” rather than “time outs” where you really sit and talk things through with her each time she acts this way and try to understand the “why”, try to redirect her to something that’s not harmful to another person (let her hit a pillow etc). I know that old fashioned people think this is ridiculous but we have enough research and education these days to understand children’s development much better and why we shouldn’t be emotionally or physically abusive to children as a form of “discipline”, that is “punishment” not discipline.
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Consistency every time. Redirect her with a calm tone. Move her to a boring spot for reflection. If she loses her mind, “I know you are angry because you don’t like this. We cannot allow you to throw things and hurt people. That’s unacceptable.”
It’s not mean to set boundaries.
It’s not mean to tell her what she’s not allowed to do.
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Watch supper nanny & get some ideas from there! Or even try to get her to your house!
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If she’s mean at only four years of age, sign her over to the state and cut your losses. You are in for nothing but misery, and others could be in harm’s way on account of the errant child. She’s too old to leave at a police precinct in a box but I think Child Services will take it off your hands. Good luck.
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Is your daughter in a nursery or childcare etc through the day ? Perhaps she’s in a situation she’s not happy in and can’t vent?.. If not and she’s just playing up for you be cruel to be kind ,teach her no one likes a horrible person x
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I’m not going to be negative, I know what it’s like to raise such a strong headed child. It’s not automatically the parent’s complete fault. She needs therapy.
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Without the medical stuff, does she have a routine? Praise the good stuff like mad, time out for the undesired behaviour and build up rewards. Ask her what she really wants to do or a toy she’d like and rewarded behaviour with a ball or marble to fill a jar. Encourage as the jar fills and then reward time for all that good behaviour. It’s finding what motivates her, what’s high value to use to your advantage. Time out is hard work at first but when the good is really good it will click. Tough love. They really should come with a manual! Good Luck!
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WHY has she been allowed to get away with SUCH behaviour? She’s only 4??
SERIOUSLY set boundaries before it’s to late,
Your NOT her friend YOUR her MOTHER.
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Put her in time out this behaviour is not exceptable redirecting her isn’t working take everything out of you laundry and lock her in you stay outside the door at all times so you can hold it closed and ensure her safety tell her when she’s quiet for 1 min you will let her out but don’t say any thing else.between her temper screaming remind her 1 min of silence again dont say anything else she is plenty old enough to do this.
This is following the TRIPLE P Parenting program my daughter stayed for over an hour the first time eventually as soon as she went in her time started but it took about a week and she never tried to stab her brother or sister in the head with a pen. Or bit or a tamper tantrum. Mine was done in the toilet it was the only room that had no window and she had time to think I did have to remover the toilet paper because she through it in the toilet.
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Time out chair. Get down to her level let her know what behavior she doing is not nice or acceptable behavior. Put her in a chair and tell her to stay there because she was not nice and theirconquencesto her bad behavior. Let her sit there for 1 min per her age. When she sit there the full time have her apologize. If she gets up put her right back into the chair don’t say anything
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Did you ever hear of spanking? Not beating nor leaving marks but letting her know you are the boss. I kicked my grandmother once. She broke a yardstick on my butt and then broke the pieces. I never did it again and that I better do what she said. I loved her and never looked back on my life as being abused. I was loved and taught to respect authority which many of our young people today do not. They had time out (useless) and no one wanted to hurt their self esteem (hogwash).
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Sometimes as the parent you have to be “mean.” Need to set some boundaries and then stick to them. Finding what gets your child’s attention is so important. Kids are all different. Could be timeouts, take things away, etc. My kids were also spanked (never bitten). But even spankings don’t work for all of them. Good luck to you.
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Have you ever had her evaluated for possible Autism? Sounds like she may be on the spectrum . She may need definitely sounds like she needs a behavior therapist ! Please have her evaluated it may answer lots of questions!
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Get down on her level and talk to her face to face tell her that behavior isn’t nice or tolerated… also set the example of being kind and nice kids replicate what they see… reward good behavior and never bad
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Its some extreme behaviour. Probably a frustration that child is seeking attention and not getting much. You might need to spend more time with the kid if you are not. Go outside for a walk or play. It should help.
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Needs a good butt spanking. Sound like aboutv2 years overdue. I got spanked when I was a kid and spanked my kids. Didn’t have to do it very often. Once they get it they don’t want it again. After that it was " the look" and they knew what that meant !
She’s acting out there’s a reason to her situation. Have you tried talking to her? Or maybe if she doesn’t want to talk have her draw or paint kiddos at this this age don’t know how to explain what’s bothering them if you have or draw you a picture of her problem or paint than you ask her questions about the pictures she drew or painted it usually tells all!! Hope this works momma🙂
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Awww that sounds very discouraging for you 
. I’m sorry!!! I’d talk with her pediatrician and maybe even a counselor?? I hope you figure something out momma!!! Sending love you and prayers!!!
My daughter was like this too. We found out she didn’t know how to vent her anger in a positive way. We had to get her help, an gave her more challenging things to do.
Parenting is hard, thank you for asking your question and seeking help for yourself and your family.
Please seek help from a professional psychologist or therapist. They can help both you (and your husband) and your child - getting to the center of the dynamics, what’s causing them and enabling you all with tools that help your specific situation.
Stay strong, it can and will get better. Also sharing a few experts our family found helpful - Gottman Parenting - The Gottman Institute and
https://www.positivediscipline.com/
If she bites bite her back if she kicks kick her back if she throws things at you throw them back if she hits you hit her back and before alk the snowflakes jump on this it doesnt have to be hard just enough to make her realise for every action theres a reaction she will eventually get the message it didnt do me any harm good old fashioned parenting never hurt anyone just taught respect
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Hate to break it to you but we aren’t here to be our child’s bestie. We are here to guide them to what is considered the right path. It’s just an assumption but I believe you all let her do whatever it is she wants because you dont want to tell her no? Well it’s time to lay down the law. Not saying beat the child but the way I learned to stop biting is by getting bit back. And being “mean” is the only way to let these children know that they need to respect you and others. Remember in the future someone else has to deal with your child and they won’t be as lenient as you are. It’s time for you to be a parent.
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Zones of regulation might help. Google it. Also a reflection mat or a chill zone. You stay there too but you ignore no eye contact no speech nothing until she has calmed down cos you can’t communicate in that state. And you use that time to calm yourself and remind yourself you don’t need to react. Then you talk about whatever happened. Also look at food and screens cos coming down off a tablet is as bad as coming off anything else addictive. Time limits and countdowns til the end with an alarm could help.
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I was just wondering. Do you spend a lot of time on your phone? I notice so many Mother’s are ignoring their children without realizing. They are glued to the phone. Maybe she is doing this for attention? I’m not saying you do but it was a thought. Spend more one and one time. It may help.
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When my daughter bit me, I bit her back… just enough to feel it. She never bit anyone again. But I think you need real help. She’s way too angry
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I had to work on me first. Being consistent, paying attention, then I had to get creative for the rest. Consequences for the behavior. It wasn’t easy to figure out, but you will find what works. Do not give up. Let me know if I can help, sometimes it takes alot of brainstorming to figure out. If you Google it, you will usually find stuff that might work textbook situations, but not all kids run in a textbook way. Good luck mama 
Sounds like some good spanking and time outs is what she needs!
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Well mommy it’s called a good old spanking .Make her realize there is considerable punishment for rude behavior. Oh yes spank her ass and make her feel it ,I did not say beat. If you don’t right the wrongs now ,you will raise a hellion .The problem today with this younger generation is MOM AND DAD didn’t see fit to correct the kids .YES I’m old school ,and dam sure works .
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Possibly A,D,H,D. Or just frustration from a child who is very bright, try to channel outbreaks into something positive without having the reaction shes looking for.Have worked for many years with students with anger issues and Autism try and find the trigger that makes them change their train of thought. Good luck ,
I can’t believe some of these well meant comments. This child needs to be evaluated by a professional ASAP. Something is going on here.
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My daughter is also 4 and had never done those behaviors to that extreme. I’m her parent first and her friend second. Consistency. First is a verbal warning 2nd time time out and 3rd she is getting disciplined with a pop on the butt. My daughter has only ever needed it twice. She learned momma don’t play and don’t pin parents against each other because it won’t work
biting, hitting and kicking her father between the legs?
At 4 she should already know better.
I bit my child once after they bit me and broke skin and that was all it took for the biting to stop, honestly I am not big on spanking either, but the kicking dad can be serious (medically) and her butt needs popped and a serious conversation before she injures someone and you end up paying the price.
Personally, a good swat on the behind would do the trick! If she bites, bite her back or if she hits hit her back. Just enough to let her know that it hurts
She sounds super active and bored. Maybe she needs to channel that powerful energy into something positive. I have a four year old son who threw massive tantrums at 3 and I used all of the ways of the world😂 The best techniques I have found that work for my son is having him sit in his room while throwing a tantrum and to breath help them slow down their anxiety. All kids have anxiety at their age some more than others. Fun chores lol keep them busy. .have them help you around the house so they keep active, spend time with you, and feel a sense of accomplishment. My son is also in martial Arts and have very limited tv time. I also do my best to treat him the way I want to be treated by him…most of the time…sometimes parents need to breathe too. Show love, kindness, and respect towards the child but at the same time make sure they know when it’s a no it will be a no, consistency and routine is key! This is just something that has worked for me with my wild child, I wish you love and hang in there mommy, four year olds are hard but also so much fun to be with😊
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We have this with our 5 year old, not to this extent. We have go e back to basics, trying to find what is triggering the behaviour. Remaining calm and speaking to him at his level. Rewards and consequences. Must importantly, both parents need to be doing the same thing.
Punishment wont work…when the child isnt deliberatley being disruptive…it will only add to their frustration…get the child evaluated by a specislist…we will never know your outcome…but wishing you and your child sucess
Seek professional help instead of social media advice. Also, she’s approaching school age it isn’t fair to her future teachers to have her disrupting their classrooms and the well being of her classmates. She’s 4. Nip this on the bud, now. There’s something obviously wrong. 
If you can get her to go to her room, let her know that as soon as the behavior stops she can come out. Make sure the length of time isn’t long. Then, keep it up. It’s hard, I know, but don’t give in. If she comes out explain it will be a longer wait. She has to stop the behavior first. I was brought up with spankings. I kept one grand child that had a similar problem. But I learned from my son, that this works. It won’t work overnight, or in a week, you hsve to be patient. No yelling or letting your buttons be pushed. Explain to her. At first I thought it was nuts!!! Believe me, what it taught me was that I was hit quite a bit growing up, something I didn’t realize had affected me so much. And yes. this child did these things, like yours. I loved her with all my heart but often drove home exhausted and crying. It takes time. I can’t syress that enough. One day I held her for over 30 minutes, fighting and kicking me and trying to throw her head back and break my nose. I said nothing. Somehow I remained calm. All of a sudden she let out an exhausted huge sigh and slumped back on me. It was over. I couldn’t help but feel so sorry for her. You see, my son has a Masters in social Work. Like I said I thought he was nuts!! Then, this particular day I learned one of the greatest lessons of my life. WE are the adults, and little people, if we let them see our weaknesses, find every button we have to push. They gain the upper hand and hurt themselves far more than us. Your daughter must see s calm and in control adult, and hear the same in your voice. I’ve kept kids from birth all my life. Some babies come in to this world far needier than others. They can suck the life out of you when it fact it’s they who are fighting everything in life. It literally came down to turning the knob around on the door and locking her in, especially when her anger hurt the other children. Now, that sounds horrible, but my son told me most likely she wasn’t going to stay in there but proceed to hurt others. This way she didn’t hurt herself. He said if she tore her room up, just wait. He’d deal with that when he got home. Broken things can be replaced. Little girls can’t. As soon as she got quiet the door was opened, she was offered a drink and a snack and praised, not overly, for having complied. As I’ve said before. Don’t beat yourself up. Time will change things, and patience is the greatest gift you can give her. But, consistency IS the key. She has you where she wants she now, she knows you love her, and she’s going to do all she can for you to give up. I’m almost 71 years old and those years when she was little about did me in. Because it doesn’t stop immediately. But, if you’re not yelling, if she can’t frustrate you, she will learn. That little girl is now 11 years old and in the top 1 percent in intelligence in the nation. She intently listens to her teachers and coaches. She is humble, and smiling, and loving. She still has some temper, but, we all do and we have to find ways to let children express their anger, in the right way. Hardest thing I ever did in my life. If adults can’t control themselves, kids are more than wise to it. She’s healthy and determined, and in control in far better terms. Just remember to immediately let her out of time out once she stops. Anger should be met with understanding, letting her know she has a right often to be angry, but not to hurt others or herself. Some kids are so easy. I know. Others, struggle. It’s just that way. I would often when she started fights or sounded like it was coming offer her a quick. Snack. Nothing big or extremely sweet, I would just ask her if she was hungry. She was a very picky eater. Once she went to the island in the kitchen. I would talk to her about this and that. Get her mind on something else and she’d forget her anger. I hope this helps. I’m no doctor or therapist. If you feel she needs help. GET IT. It will help you too. My son and his wife limited their kids to around one hour a day of tv. No video games, but time on the computer to play games for half an hour each child. Now that meant they had to find things to do. I can’t tell you how many crafts we did, coloring, letting them make homemade tents. Those girls are the top readers in their schools. They read books constantly. All of that has created great imaginations. It’s a start. It’s one well worth it. I prayed a lot, for her for myself. You can do this, always remember, you’re in charge, the example you set will be what she carries with her all her life. In the end she will always know she was loved. A footnote. If she will stay in her room there’s no need to lock the door. Our child would not under any circumstances stay in there. She’d proceed to throw things and I had a baby crawling at the time. She’d scare the other two and often I had to pick her up screaming and kicking to get her to her room and I’m no spring chicken. We tried for a long time but she was never going to stay in there. She’d calm down after about 5 mins or so. There was no one to lash out at and she heard the rest of us playing, etc and didn’t want to be excluded. Usually I waited outside the door. That door had dents in it. One time she tore a closet door off it hinges. I was in shock. I think she scared herself too. But hitting her wasn’t an option and does more harm than good. Hopefully your child will stay in there!! Please don’t bite her back either. Our child bit, but, once this all started to work, it wasn’t an issue. When she did bite she had to go to her room immediately in the same way and I was always there, on alert, she didn’t bite often because I wax very attentive to what was going on all the time. With kids like this you have to be. I was tending the baby and she bit her older sister and I heard her yelling. I had to pry her off but the other child wasn’t hurt badly. I would have to say even though it may work, adults biting children just justifies their reasons for doing so. Yes, they may stop, but nonetheless, it’s not an example of much value otherwise. Our child use to sit with her fingers in her ears and rock back and forth, she couldn’t stand loud noises. Now, that might be s sign of being on the ADHD scale, but, her dad didn’t go off the deep end and call in the troops. He waited. Those things have other things that follow. He knew the signs and even children who aren’t on that scale will do the same thing. She stopped and usually when they do this behavior you already can add up other behaviors that will clue you in. She just stopped. They. can be anxious and stressed as much as we can.
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You don’t redirect her. You decipline her for bad behavior. Time outs if she’s four 4 minutes in the corner. Yes she will come out of corner and you put her back in Time out. It will take like 15 time’s but don’t give up
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It’d be cool if you give her fidget toys and teach her that if she ever feels stressed or angry, to take the anger out on the fidget toys. It could be calming and could change her attitude. Idk 
I never had kids, but as a kid I wish I had that.
But if it gets to an unbearable point, you’ll have no choice but to discipline her for real.
Reward good behavior. Also spend time with her. Do things together. Color, draw, make cookies and tell her how proud you are of her. Reinforce her good behavior.
Does she transition well? Maybe prepare her beforehand? As for those behaviors stay consistent in how you deal with them and do not give in. Take away the tablet and stick to that as an example. I would also talk to your pediatrician about these behaviors.
Have you had her checked by a doctor? She could have some type of disability, i.e. hearing deficiency, visual problems, etc. If you’re cut off from the world by a disability, your reactions to those around you could seem frightening to anyone else.
I spanked my daughter and sometimes that’s just what they need a spanking and a time out. Then explain why. Some kids just need it.
Behavior doctors have helped my son tremendously. It may be she needs to be medicated.
Sounds like up until now you parents let her get away with what she wants and now youve got a problem child who is spoilt a brat most likely hits other kids her age… youve got some hard work ahead …put some rules in your house for gods sake
I had an unruly son and he got sent to his room, then I would calmly talk to him about what he did wrong, then he would get a smack on his butt. It works when you don’t do it in anger.
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Shut off the television, and any internet gaming the child can see. Bad behavior is learned behavior, and it sounds like the child is overstimulated. A friend is having similar issues with his daughter, but doesn’t make the connection between having violent adult themed shows running in the background and her behavior.
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My daughter was spiteful as a child and it was because she didn’t know how to communicate she isn’t spiteful now but is autistic. U do not tolerate any mean behaviour the message has to be it’s unacceptable first time she hits she is sat on a stair or chair etc u do not communicate If she gets up you put her back when time is up you explain she is there due to x y z and then make her say sorry she and u send that message every time she is mean
I think that first make sure nothing is medically wrong then try talking to the child and finding out what’s going on is she having problems try to listen and take it from there
My advice is not what folks want to hear …but I spanked my kids . No that isn’t always the answer but I feel like a kid kicks there dad between the legs it’s time for a come to jesus meeting. 
4 years old or not. We did corner time too …and when they get older taking away activities and games ect. Hopefully no more spanking /whippings by that age range.
Sometimes a good ol fashioned spanking gets through. Not all kids are gonna respond the same.
Usually children with that kind of behavior needs /seach a lot of attentions from people around them . Try to give her more attention , ask her opinion like in food or dresses , try to appreciate her doings but you have to balance at the same time too much of it will boost her superiority complex
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Watch supernanny on youtube, she will teach you effective ways of discipline for the age of the child xx
Be consistent… be firm … set clear boundaries… and don’t back down.Positive reinforcement for good behavior. And it’s your way or the highway.
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Seek a behavior therapist now! You need to change your dynamic or it will only grow worse. Could be ODD.
Spare the rod spoil the child it is a old saying but so true
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Children not having been brought up with the aid of a playpen have been able to run around, have their toys all over the house and have no patience or understanding of the world they live in. Children brought up being in a playpen with some toys while Mom makes a meal, does a load of wash, etc haven’t learned to run wild but also get plenty of Mom time, cuddling, being read to, etc. They become easier to teach when it’s time to go to school and can sit still easier than those who have been running all over the house and getting into things. Parents thought plsypens were too restrictive and stopped using them but didn’t consider how helpful they were to use for short times while they took care of the house, meals, etc. So now they have wild children they can’t handle!
Counseling the baby may be dealing with emotions or trama they can’t express.
Set boundaries. Tell her what is wrong and right, explain that she is being rude and mean. If she gets cranky, hold her down, make sure that you are physically stronger and if you please, you can overwhelm whatever she plans. Make sure that she gets the point of being mean and nasty is not a good behaviour, hurts others, and makes her lonely after a while because no one likes the mean people. And for final restraint, for example, if she kicks someone, especially Mom or Dad, a big, full palm slap on her butt can do. Just make sure that she gets explanation why is she getting the big one. Good luck.
She needs the nicker treatment and my daughter who is 41 only bite me once as I bit her back and she never bite anyone again
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Reward good behavior not the bad stuff. Ignore the temper tantrums. Let her cry and scream all she wants. If you give in it will only get worse.
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Discipline isn’t mean… it’s mean not to prepare your child for later in life where actions have real consequences
It’s a parents duty to release a decent human being into society. There is no excuse for that bs!
You have to be consistent… Put her butt in timeout for 4 minutes if she gets up it starts over… it’ll be exhausting the first couple of days but she’ll catch on
Obviously the child wears the pants in the family… “Re direct” that little behind straight to her room and let her know who’s in control.
Get a food allergy test. Take her off all processed foods. She might be reacting because of a food allergy.
Remember when kids were small , one bit my husband on the arm , he bit them back … Never happened again…
Explain we don’t behave like that towards your elders. I would say she needs a good spanking. But others would say it’s child abuse! As you see talking doesn’t work and taking away things don’t faze her.
You should move all of the breakable high up away from her! Kicking should not be allowed either. If you don’t correct this bad behavior it will get worst. Good Luck
First identify from where she’s learning all.Find source and then only you can find solution.Kicking dad between the legs???
Get down on your knees (her level) and talk with her about consequences for misbehaving. Have a time out area to put the child in when misbehaving. It will take several days for child to comply. Don’t give up or give in. Good luck !
Watch cartoons tv shows about bullies. A lot of kids shows have at least 1 episode about it. Then tell her your feeling get hurt to when shes mean.
Wow she actually asked for no negative and that’s all you’ve given her.
Talk to her, actually talk to her as a person. Explain to her with words she understands.
That doesn’t work, spare the rod, spoil the child.
Sometimes all you need is a trip to the woodshed , then a little explanation on why you got to this point. People only get away with what you let them.
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Ok guys I was making a joke calm down. Clearly some of yal got it. I’m not gonna defend my responses this is my only response sorry I spilled the salt guys
I’m wondering if you have talked to her doctor to rule out any health conditions?
Sit her down and don’t shout and quietly tell her how she should behave
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Usely sometimes bad behavior is a sign of autism have her ped. For a refurral
We watched Daniel tiger and it explains feeling and lots of other experiences kids will go through
Have you gotten her evaluated for ADHD? I ask because, younger kids especially, kids who have ADHD have a hard time focusing and can have some behavioral issues as well before they get help from a specialist.
On the flip side if there is no issue with the above stated then my answer is USE OTHER TOOLS IN YOUR PARENT TOOL BELT. More specifically time out and talking away privileges. Especially if you gave your child a phone, or an ipad, and or let them watch tv.
When my 3 year old, almost 4 year old, starts sassing me I plop her in timeout, she continues to be mean I take away all hard toys, colorings stuff etc and only let her play with stuffed animals and have books to read. No shows, no electronics.
I would suggest, if you haven’t already, to take her to her doctor to see if she does have ADHD. If they then clear her, no development issues etc, then go into the time outs etc. However I feel like not giving timeouts, and just redirecting, is obviously not working. Timeouts don’t have to be long, and they do not harm the child. Just plop them in a seat, or in their crib if they are absolutely flipping their shit (it’s also a great time to calm down yourself), for 5 minutes or so and tell them they need to be quiet when in timeout and explain to them as calmly as you can why they are in timeout , add a minute each time they freak out. When the time is up and they are finally calm go in and explain again WHY and have them repeat it back to you. Make sure you have them say sorry for it too.
If it’s not acceptable to you for a 6 year old to do it, don’t let your 4 year old do it.
Time to sit her on her bed and say…time out and talk to her. You can’t kick us etc etc. If you keep repeating this she will eventually get the fact that you are the mom. She’s four. She has to be molded or she will control you later on. A tap on the butt and lots of no…you can’t do that. It’s slot of consistency .take her from what’s she’s doing wrong…kicking etc. And stop and tell her…no. she’s testing her boundaries to see what she can do and not do. She will outgrow slot of this but start to show her now so she knows you are the boss … no bites of you get no snack…no kicking or you can’t go out with mommy…behave of we can’t play…etc. it’s lots of repeated actions. My son used to throw himself on the floor to get his own way . Many trips dragging him to his room and making him stay there till he stopped the fits. Also stood him in the corner alot. She’s four and and she’s to young yet to do this . When he really was mean a tap on the butt got his attention …hope this helped . Each kid is different. They all want their own way …
Therapy. She’s going through something. Figure it out before she seriously hurts someone or herself.
Get down on the floor and throw a fit aswell and say something like i dont want to cook anymore ect lol
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Definitely read “the explosive child by ross green” there’s also a Facebook group to help The B Team.
Have you tried martial arts or some disciplined outlet
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Ok first of all despite every comment saying otherwise a child with difficult behaviour DOES NOT automatically have anything. These days it’s easier to misdiagnosis them with something . There are of course times when it dies but go down every avenue FIRST.
I have a very active child who was doing the same that you have described and believe he was misdiagnosised. He’s doing much better after weeks OFF the medication medication and I wish I’d never put him on to begin with as the meds really messed other areas up. Change the diet. .cut out sugar really stomp down screen time and try to keep them as active as you can. Sounds simple but I know it isn’t. I’m a single mum so it IS draining I know and unfortunately there’s no easy fix (his behaviour was worse on the meds). Feel free to message me. I’m no expert but if I can help in any way I’m more then happy too
I bit mine, it was the last time he did it.
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If he doesn’t mind, swat his butt. My parents swatted us and we turned out fine.
She needs discipline…turn negative into positive…U must stand ur ground…can she go head start school?
Have you tried spanking her and showing her just who the real boss is ?
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