Find better employment, and then leave. Look into state assistance. Start applying for all assurances. Look up bus passes. And find somewhere for you and the kids to go.
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im not gonna repeat what others have already said…
what i WILL say is this:
you ARE an amazing person!!!
you ARE wayyy stronger than you think/believe!!!
you DESERVE to be happy and healthy/ not just for YOU but for those babies!!!
your children NEED/DEPEND on you and they look to you for love and safety!!!
there ARE people that love you, but not a single one as much as your children do!!!
PLEASE know that God WILL provide for you, if you just believe and ask…
He KNOWS what you need and He may not just directly ‘give’ you things (cars, money, etc), but He WILL be there with you and guide you in His plan!!!
im an abuse survivor and can honestly sat that even though our stories done match completely but i most certainly can say that the things ive mentioned are going to be a major source of your strength!!!
im praying for you and those precious babies!!! 
Get out hun U and Ur kids deserve so much better it won’t stop
Sweetie, you already know what to do or you wouldn’t have written this. That little voice is telling you what to do. For your children and yourself get your ducks in a row and when the time is right, just leave. I’ve been there so I know. Mine threw my dog down the basement stairs to hurt me. You have to leave, trust me.
First of all thank you for coming forward, that shows you’re stronger than you know. Abuse is Abuse. Period. The mental and emotional will FAR outweigh the physical. You have to leave the situation, it’s not going to be easy but it IS worth it! Despite what you think/say, those who ask about the holes in your wall know the truth. That’s where your help comes from. Reach out to the ones who are concerned. Before it’s too late. Prayers for a hedge of protection for you and your children.
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Your better to leave but done buy a gun not a good idea
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Same boat. Different narc. 
Get out of there guick take Ur kids out of that atmosphere he’s not worth it go to a refuse police station so forth
Girl please leave for you and your kids safety, its gonna be tough in the beginning but long term you’ll be much more happier and SAFE!
I am a child of a parent who was an Alcoholic. He didn’t abuse physically but mentally he did. Always yelling always verbally abusing calling horrible names over stupid things like his hair comb being moved down the other end of bench. Just insignificant things. Calling me stupid blaming me for things that I just didn’t do. I was terrified of making him angry. Long story short I grew up believing my opinion or my feelings weren’t warranted. Took many years to overcome. We had a good relationship prior to his death though but took many years for me to overcome my problems. Get out now cause kids copy. I am 56 now and still sometimes respond to others with anger that’s uncalled for. Don’t get me wrong it wasn’t all bad but it stays with you.
Get out now you can do it.
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Get out and get your son therapy or some kind of help
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Get out. When I went through it, the local police department told me they could help me get out and get on my feet. Look into all resources in your area. But it doesn’t get better… Until you get out. That’s the hardest part of it all.
It doesn’t help just telling her to leave. That is exactly what she is trying to figure out. Stop spamming her to leave the situation with no resolution or advice on how. Call around for shelter homes for women and children. There are places such as where I’m from we have ywca. A shelter home with usually 2 beds 2 bunk beds in each room a kitchen and living room. Rent is based off of income and if u don’t have a job u have to be actively looking for one. They also have phone and visitation restrictions to avoid from contacting ur abuser or ur abuser contacting u. There is help YOU ARE NOT ALONE nor are you isolated.
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Please contact s domestic violence shelter in your area. They will help you rebuild your life and give you and your children a safe place to live.
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Gtfo before he kills you. Or it’s only a matter of time that your kids get older and he loses it with one of them. I’ve been there and I gtfo…
l would call the police, and explain things. Have a bag ready with important papers. SS, birth certificates, etc., medications. Have a friend in your fone, and text a specific code word for help when he isnt around. Get to a shelter, and file restraining order. Or call 911, leave, grab the bag, and head to aplace that you can walk too. Please, for those kids sake, LEAVE.
Maybe look and see if there’s a women’s resource center around you that can assist. Good luck 
Womens refuge, drs can point you in right direction of places to seek help,citizens advice. Any family or friends, even if they pretend they don’t know they usually do and may offer help. It’s all very daunting and scary but in time it gets easier. Good luck
Get out hun before he hurts you bad or your children, your kids will thank you in the end promise
Find a shelter for abused women. You and your kids need out ASAP.
Definitely contact a local program in your area find resources and help. So many on this thread mean well and have good intentions, but unfortunately they may be putting you in harms way and at more risk. You need someone specially trained on the dynamics.
Get you and your children away from all of this it will definitely have an effect on them their whole lives
Well done for being so brave to reach out and ask for help and advice. You have tolerated so much and even had marriage guidance to try to work through it. Sounds like there is no change in his behaviour.
It’s unacceptable to be treated this way. You don’t deserve this. There are womens refuge in all boroughs, seek the help, it’s out there! Be strong 
. Wishing you all the best xx
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My apologies, somebody decided to use my response as some kind of spam hunting trigger so I am reporting them and deleting it
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Get the he’ll out, why would you wait till her hurts someone
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Pretty sure you answered your own question here. Unlike for men though, there are NUMEROUS outlets that help women out of these situations. Not sure of your location but, there’s abuse hotlines for women etc. Here is one that can help & get you in touch with the right resources to help you. Disregard the location of this hotline, they can connect you or help you get to the right folks no matter where you are in the nation. https://www.womenindistress.org/we-can-help/24-hour-crisis-hotline/
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You have 400 reasons why you should stay in an abusive marriage. Leave before someone gets hurt. You’re abusing the kids. With alimony and child support, you can have peace, your own car and a place to live. Women In Distress or Salvation Army will assist. Good luck
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Semi abusive isn’t a thing. That’s abuse!! You and your kids deserve better and a safe, peaceful environment!!! You’ll survive without a car, you might not survive physically or mentally if you stay with him!!
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Get out you will be fine I did a very long time ago with 4 kids
1st thing you do is figure out a safe place to go, 2nd thing is to clean out every account you are on & 3rd is to leave to that safe place. Immediately file for divorce & go from there
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Everybody needs counseling. Ptsd and behavior is definitely gonna need to be addressed. You will succeed Mama
Where do you live. In the uk you can phone womens aid and they will house you and your children. Give you all counselling and support and work out your finances with you. If you are somewhere else look for this support. There is domestic abuse support. You and your children will be so much better off. It sounds similar to the situation I was in. Last year i left with my 2 children. I’m much better off for it. I felt like I wouldnt cope without him he was the other part of me but when I found myself again I realised just how unhappy I was. Be safe, keep your babies safe and all the best with your future x
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You have to be completely fed up in order to leave or you’ll always keep going back ,so the balls in your court ,you make the decision…children rather be from a broken home ,then live in a broken home …
Long past time. Go NOW.
I’ve been in your situation. I ran with my kids to a shelter. I don’t have a car. When you have had enough, you will leave. No one can tell you when or how. You will know. Trust yourself. You can do it without him. I promise. I did. I still am. But you won’t leave until you are absolutely ready to. And you won’t care about anything but protecting your kids. Forget about your car. Worry about the kids. Everything else will follow. Good luck!
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I lasted 11 years of verbal and emotional abuse from my husband. We have 2 sons, they were in 3rd & 4th grades when I kicked him out. You can get help to get on your feet.
Semi abusive?? That is full blown abuse. Honestly, when I left my ex, I left him everything. I said you can have our home and the car, I just want our child and he agreed. I figured, if I let him have everything it would be one less thing for him to come after me for. I left with nothing and I gained everything. I am miles from where I was the day I walked out. Leave! And never look back. You won’t regret it.
Women’s aid or shelter or even speak to your GP they can point you in the right direction I know it will be daunting and scary to leave especially with your 3 kids but you deserve to live a better life as staying puts you at more risk I wish you all the luck In the world x
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Call a friend or a co-worker and get to the nearest women’s shelter in your area. They will help you file the appropriate documents with the police . He is not going to change, and you’re allowing your son to emulate his. fathers behavior. You need to save yourself and your children.you don’t have money for a car payment, so walk away before he puts you in the grave .
What about family? Anyone you can stay with to get back on your feet?
Sometimes it feels really scary to take the first step because even though what you are going through is scary, the unknown can be scarier. It takes a lot of faith, love, and bravery to take the next step, but the fact that you are considering it - means that your love for your children, and your self is stronger than your fear. You’ve got this. You CAN do it. One step at a time.
First step, find a local women’s shelter, or support group. These groups are so supportive and will let you move at YOUR pace. They have resources, and support groups… some places you can attend the support group even before you leave - they will help you mentally prepare for that unknown.
It’s a big step. It’s really scary. But you can do it.
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Nothing semi abusive here.
Abuse is abuse and hurting you is never ok…
Get you and your babies out safely and quickly…
You got this…
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The person that posted on your behalf should be contacting the corrected teams, as a duty of safety and concern for the children.
Not posting it on your behalf for tips from strangers
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First thing…. Stop telling yourself you could “never” do this or that. You could “never” afford a car payment? I doubt that. We all pay car payments. Will you have to change your life and way of thinking? Yes! You can do anything you want to do. It’s up to you if you really want to get out of this relationship.
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Sounds like my situation.
Listen, no car or man is worth your freedom or happiness. Abusive full stop ,no semi. Leave for your sake and the children’s. Nip your son’s behavior in the bud.Go
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Leave… take the kids and leave… Otherwise your teaching your children this is okay.
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Don’t be concerned about how your children will be as adults, be concerned with how they are right now! A typical 9 year old would never get so angry that their thought process is to choke someone. Your husband’s behavior is already perpetuated by your son and I can guarantee that your daughter’s reactions are perpetuated by how you respond to your husband. All of you deserve better. There are women’s shelters. Take your kids and run!
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he isnt semi abusive hes full on abusive u need to be strong and walk away with ur children before it harms them poor kids anymore i know its hard because u have been togther 9 years if u ring womens aid they will help u and put u somewhere safe where he cant find u
What the hell is Semi-abusive? Isn’t this just abusive?
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Go to a woman shelter with ur kids they can help u fine a place u can afford n get a probative order against him
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Its gunna be hard. But do whats best for the kids. Get a full time job, he will have to help with support, you can get welfare and housing. There are lots of options. Seek help at a woman’s shelter and they will help u asap. The first step is the hardest. Go…
Get you and kids OUT. You CAN do it… Do it scared but do it anyways, you’ll be ok… stay at home mom since the beginning of time, you already have skills… Daycare center? Housekeeping? You have skills that can earn you an income somewhere.
Once you’ve gathered your bearings-allow yourself to feel whatever emotions you need… Don’t let those emotions trick you in thinking you can’t or do it or are going to regret it. Once you’ve had time to get yourself sorted out for a minute, your son is 7… Old enough to sit down and explain the things he’s watched his dad? Do… Are not ok and not healthy ways to express yourself, explain this 25 million times, it’ll take a bit for him to adjust, but he can and will. Get him into therapy if needed, but my opinion, following your lead on turning new leaf he’ll get there too with help from you.
It’s hard, it’s scary. But you know you need it, your kids need it and you’ll be better off in the long run.
I feel for you! Every man I have ever loved has been abusive physically and always verbally abusive. Problem is the Government does not care to help us women out with it. They say there are shelters for women but if it is like all other housing situations they run out of room and cannot take all women. The Government makes us women fight for every bit of food stamp or other help they give. I quit depending on the Government as fast as I could as it was humiliating and dehumanizing. Good luck to you. Pray. Try to dream and manifest what you want for your life. See it in your mind as happening and push negative fears away. I don’t know what else to tell you. Take care.
Oh babe 
abuse is abuse there’s no semi about it. You need to get out. I wish you all the best
I wish I could hug you. I wish I could help you. I do know that you should get out of there, you will feel so much better. Your babies will appreciate more for you to have left than to stay and endure this for years to come. How you speak to your kids becomes their inner voice, don’t let that narcissistic ass crush their tiny little spirits. I’m sending all my love your way, and I hope you know you are strong enough and worthy enough to leave and make it just fine. Indeed has legitimate listings for work at home jobs. Search for remote or at home in your state and read the description carefully to ensure it’s a w2 position and not a 1099. You will need good internet, which you can get thru comcast for 9.99 a month, internet essentials. Next you’d need a computer or laptop with an ethernet cable port so you can connect your internet via the cord. If you don’t have a pc you can rent one from Aaron’s or rent a center at least temporarily. Some places provide equipment. Cvs health, William’s sonoma, teletech aka Ttec, are all ones I’ve personally worked at home for. Best of luck. Seriously. You got this. Please get out. Let him suffer. He’s probably a giant baby man who can’t even feed himself, you need to lose that dead weight babe.
Pfa and he’ll be removed immediately from the property with his belongings. You keep the children in the home with you. Get rid of him. Message me if you need to love 
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If you son is acting like that he needs couceling now…he will get worse as he gets older.and girlfriends and a wife will pay for it.just like you are.
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Well for starters go live with a family member /friends get you a full time job 40+ hrs a week possibly maybe even 2-3 jobs just so you can make ends meets I’m sure there are low income housing you could look at once you get things settled and I’m sure there are places that will work with you on affordable payments for a vehicle
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Honey, there is no such thing as “semi abusive”. HE IS ABUSING YOU AND YOUR KIDS. Please leave before it gets worse because IT WILL. Even if its been 10 years, even if he hasn’t before, HE WILL. Is there any family that you can stay with until you get a full time job and on your feet? Are there any womens charities in your area? Do you have a regular doctor, church, school counselor you could ask for help finding programs in your area? There is help out there, I hope you find it. Good luck
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Leave today. Take your children and go to the nearest shelter. Dont go to a friend or family if he will find you. He sounds extremely mentally I’ll and dangerous. Please know this will not change. Do it for your kids if you wont do it for you. Best of luck and happiness in your future.
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It is sad that you have to go through this
Unfortunately the only way to leave abuse is by leaving the abuser (considering communication about issues, trying to draw boundaries of acceptable behavior around the house, therapy etc have been done and not been benefitted from).
Impact of emotional trauma can be far worse than physical, in many cases.
And children don’t have the capacity to process all that’s happening. They will blame themselves now, or rationalise it as being deserved behavior, or simply accept it as the norms of how a father is supposed to act like, and how a man is supposed to be towards others, how a family is… etc.
Pls consider family therapy.
When the children grow up they won’t just wonder why dad did what he did, but also why mom let him.
You do not deserve to be treated like this. Please consider reaching out to the DV National 24 hr hotline 800.799.SAFE (7233) before things escalate any further.
They will connect you to your local resources. I worked for a DV shelter for 15 years and know they will help you. They will specifically help you on leaving, formulating a safety plan specific to your situation.
You got this mama!
Sounds like you already waited too long. Get those kids outta there!! 
There is lots of help for a single mother, including housing and help with transportation, medical, and food benefits.
Leave. Don’t wait for him to start abusing the kids physically he’s already destroying them mentally.
It’s time to stand up for yourself nd your kids…I don’t think you will ever want your daughters to be treated like that because what u allowing to happen to you if what they will feel it’s ok daddy did that to mummy…your son will do the same as mummy allowed it nd did not do anything to stop daddy…please do something about it before its to late…No amount of finance he provide can give u and your kids the peace of mind…I feel it’s unfair that u allow your kids to go through so much trauma just for the sake of a car and house…there is help out there try nd find resources people that could help u do reach out…the best of luck plz keep us posted
You need to leave. He is not going to change. Woman shelter is where you should go.
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Leave his ass abuse is abuse no matter what form…find some family members that will take you and yours in their homes…Never wait til it’s to late…
There are services out there to help families in your situation. Please try to get in touch with one of them. You are not alone there is help to leave abusive situations.
No more excuses for him!!! Let ppl know, yeah, he can’t control himself as an adult when he gets mad, frustrated, etc. so he tears our home up. Let ppl see what he does, how he behaves worse than a lot of children do. Start posting pics of any marks he leaves behind, shout it to the roof tops that he’s abusive. Hostile environment is not good for anyone and the kids will learn the behaviors for sure. Reach out to family members to help watch the kiddos so you can work full time. Move in with a friend or family member until you’re ready for your own place.
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No excuse what’s so ever to stay . Your only allowing your kids to follow the same cycle , n letting to believe it’s okay to live like that , you gotta break that cycle n leave before you lose your kids all because u can’t make the payments to anything. The struggle is real n it’s not worth staying with him if you really love yourself kids n care for them PROTECT THEM. It’s gonna be hard but you have to do what you have to do for them n that’s leave without turning back . I’ve been through it n believe me I did it . Worked my ass off n up to now I’ve been doing it n working 8 years straight . N now my kids think it’s okay to continue the cycle n believe me it hurts to see them go through it n when they tell you you stayed mom 
I should could’ve would’ve just made them change 
good luck n may god bless
If your son is choking his sister you have got to get him help. Can you ask your job if you could pick up more days? Have you looked into government assistance or other housing options?
Get those babies out of there momma! Find a woman’s shelter… anything. I am afraid for y’all’s safety.
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Put YOU first. Don’t worry about him. Do what is best for YOU. Which sounds to me like run! It’s hard. But staying will only be worse.
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Call the hotline or watch/listen to videos on YouTube about abuse while you are driving. That will help you get the strength to leave.
What would you tell your daughter if she had told you this ? You can get help from the council and universal credits and woman’s aid
You’ve already waited to long… It’s time… Get out before it’s too late
You go to the courts. They file for an order of protection. You have him removed from home. He pays child support and depending on your state you can get him for alimony. You start slow and you keep moving foward. Baby steps but your not trapped.
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Call a local domestic abuse place n get out fast!
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Fir the sake of your children, get out! I went thru this and the day he threw a game controller and hit our son, it was over. He blamed our son for “being in the way.” Our son was standing, watching him play because he knew not to move in front of the TV or all hell would break loose. I decided right then if he would throw something and say it was my son’s fault for getting hit, it was time to get out because it would only get worse.
Your answering your own question by posting you know u need to leave and trust me it’s hard to do but put your children first and that will make u strong everything will work out will take time but u can get through it wish u all the luck in the world x
Coming from someone who just lost a friend from a domestic, please please get out of there! You never think it can happen to you but it can. If you’re not willing to leave then place your children with someone else who can provide a safe and healthy home.
Pray have faith make a plan reach out to someone you trust and get out I know exactly how you feel I stayed In the same situation for 34 years I was literally the worst decision and worst 34 years of my life and my kids life they have so much trauma related issues as adults as a result of me staying
You need to pack your shit and gtfo now you say your son is starting to act like him and your worried abouthim well what about your other kids do you have daughters think about this you said he hurts you sometimes well your daughters are going to grow up thinking it’s OK if my husband hurts me my father hurt my mom and she took it is that the life you want for your kids because that is the only way that they will know love take your kids and LEAVE your ABUSUER you all deserve better
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No hun, he’s not semi abusive ,he’s full blown abuser. For your sake and your babies, leave, now. There’s always help out there. Hugs🤗
Where are you located?
I think she’s asking how to get out, not if she should. Depending on what state you’re in a lot of times you can get government help with housing when it’s getting out of an abusive situation
There is no such thing as a little abuse. Find a group near you. They will help you find a safe way to leave. God bless
You need to find courage! Think of your children’s future! If you loose your car sorry but who cares ! There’s buses , Uber ! I don’t like sounding harsh but enough is enough and you are responsible for their life! Please leave .
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Please leave cuz this WILL have a lasting effect on all of your kids…your son now thinks it’s OK to hit women……
that’s not cool, and if you stay it will get worse, then your son will grow up as an abuser.
Do you want your daughters to grow up and think being hit by a man is OK??? They will think they if you stay and they will end up in situations like this and won’t know any better!!! Leave NOW matter how hard it is!!!Record calls, keep messages, record the abuse….you can do this!!! Leave for the sake of your kids……
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Listen the mere fact that one of your kids is emulating said behavior on a sibling should be enough for you. Who cares about a vehicle - mass transportation! Start new! Get Out before he kills you or your child kills is sibling! And please stop downplaying the abuse as it is not “little” what you have briefly described…it’s already rearing it’s ugly side effects on your CHILDREN
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U need to leave him as soon as possible
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There is no such thing as semi abusive! Stop playing it down hun. Run!
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You need to get out asap!!
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That’s not “semi abusive” It’s straight up ABUSE! Take this matter seriously and find help through the courts and domestic abuse centers. Don’t threaten him or give him any heads up to your plans. You need to get your ducks in a row but first and foremost protect your kids and yourself!
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Reach out to your local community crisis center they can help you leave.
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Never easy. But you need to get out. Your children are suffering like you, if not more. Save yourself, save your kids.
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Get out now the honeymoon baby is over start a new life you can do it because I did just believe that I believe you can do this
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I’m a single mom of two and we just make it happen. You don’t realize what you’re capable of until you’re doing it. You’re putting your kids in danger and it’s even worse that they’re imitating his behavior too. Stop making excuses and leave asap. You’ll figure it out along the way.
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