I am an adoptee. There’s a lot of levels to adoption - positive and negative. I have a different viewpoint because my adoptive parents are wonderful and my birth mom has outright refused reunion and turned her other children against me…however, I know a lot of people have positive reunions/wonderful open adoptions. It’s a big decision and not one to be taken lightly for sure.
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You need to reach out for real help and support hun. Literally no one here with a brief snippet can give you the right answer. Maybe have a look to see if theres some counselling or parents support in your local area…someone you can talk to about the ins and outs of all this and help you figure it all out.
Best of luck
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Asking thousands of people this question will give you thousands of answers. Find a counselor or life coach based on your income to help you sort out your life and mental health, along with a plan of action.
Secondly, just for the record, children don’t care if their parents are broke. They want unconditional love, attention and a stable household. Most children who are poor and have those things don’t even realize they are poor.
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As a mom who lost custody of her first daughter the same way. I will say when I found out I was pregnant again in 2021 I was told multiple times by not only my brain but other people that I didn’t deserve this baby due to not raising my oldest. That I needed to put her up for adoption or give her to her dad. But now that she’s here I’m so very glad I have her. I mentally struggled my whole pregnancy with whether I deserved to be a mom again or not or whether I should put her up for adoption or not (dad was not in the picture at the time) because I was on bed rest and couldn’t afford things for her. It was very rough. I decided to go to counseling and get on antidepressants while I was pregnant (there are safe meds to take while pregnant) counseling really helped though it was a safe space to talk without being judged about how I didn’t feel like I deserved a chance to be a mom again after I lost custody of my oldest. Or how I felt about what if my oldest hates me when she gets older because I had another child but couldn’t take care of her but I could this baby. Life is hard and there is no instruction manual but one thing I know is if you choose to keep her you won’t regret it. Having her was the second best day of my life. And now that I’ve grown from the situation with my oldest it’s made me a better mom and person.
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I think you should probably work on getting yourself and your life in order before having more babies. You don’t have custody of 2 and got pregnant again knowing your situation. You have alot of growing up to do and you need a tubal or serious birth control.
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You are still young yourself so don’t be so hard on yourself. Honestly if I were in your situation I would consider giving up custody to your parents. I would focus on my education (trade schools are less than a year depending on what you go for! EX: Pima Medical), start a career so I could prove that I could be financially stable to support 3 kiddos. I would purchase a home (whether it be a mobile home, apartment etc) with enough bedrooms for kids and while your working on that take parenting classes, keep in communication with DHS. Tell them you have a plan, prove to them, your parents and your kids that you are fighting to put things right. No matter how much we mess up in life we can always move forward! Don’t give up!
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Oh boy, you don’t need more kids, you need to grow up
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You do not need to give up your baby if you don’t want you to. And if you truly don’t want to, you shouldn’t!! Your parents sound awful, but I’ve kind of experienced that too. They don’t want you to get better and be better, they want to keep you “failing” so they can keep your babies. But you can prove them wrong!! Stop listening to them and everyone else and just go after what you want. My kids grew up with us broke too, for a few years. And now we’re good and they’re happy. But they were happy when we were broke too. My son is 13 and he tells me that yeah it sucked being broke for those years but he’s glad we were because he feels like that struggle strengthened him and us as a family in a lot of ways that are better than just having the most expensive clothes or whatever toy they wanted. Kids really just need the basic necessities and ton of love to be happy. Sounds to me like you love them more than anything in this world. The only thing stopping you from your full potential is the things your parents are putting in your head and the fact that you believe it. They’re wrong. You can do this. You can do literally anything. You already have a place to live and a job, just keep pushing and working. Look into legal aid to help you fight to get your babies back. You having this baby you’re currently pregnant with will just show the courts that you can do it. And not only that, they’ll see that your other babies have a sibling at home and siblings shouldn’t be separated if they don’t need to be. We’ve all struggled in our past, I’ve done things I’m not proud of. I was lucky enough to stay out of legal trouble, but that was pure luck. But if I could buckle down and get my life together even with all that negativity in my ear from the people who were supposed to love me and support me, I know you can too. And seriously I really mean this, if you need someone to talk to about all this stuff, build you up, vent to, etc. feel free to message me any time. I’d be happy to be there for you. I had 2 amazing friends who are probably the biggest reason I was able to pull myself out of those dark places and get my life back. Sometimes that’s all you need to get back to you again. 
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Keep this baby. And get fixed right after. You should have been smart not to get pregnant with already having problems.
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I would keep the baby to prove to the courts and your family that you’re a kick ass mom. Life is hard now but it’s not going to stay this way. You already have everything for her, which is amazing. Start buying diapers a pack a paycheck and some wipes and you’ll be set! Do what your heart wants to do… raise one of your babies.
Remind me never to ask for help in this group! So many rude and judgemental ladies
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There’s more to this story but I do know once u lose custody it’s hard to get them back, at the end of the day u need to think about what would be best for that baby! If your parents are willing to love and raise that baby 2 then let them! I know you said adoption so u will get paid and be able to pay off stuff but that’s wrong. Your financial burdens are your own. I know u think it would be a win win cause the baby would get a good life and u would get money to MAYBE help get your kids back but when that child gets older and looks for u and asks u why and u have to tell her u put her up for adoption to get your other 2 kids back it’s gonna hurt her! If your not on birth control already please look in to it, so u will have a better chance of not having to go thru this pain all over again. Take some time an really think about it
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There is so much judgement in this world & in these comments!!! First of all pray for a clear mind. You have done everything right for the child you are pregnant with which proves that you want your child! Everybody makes mistakes and nobody is perfect!!! Second, get you an attorney, there are some that will take you pro bono or even Legal Aid. You have proven that you can do it with the one that you are pregnant with and you can do it with your other children! Nobody has ever said that life is easy and anything worth having is going to be a fight! Yes you will be tired and you may have to work two jobs, you may have to have help from your parents for child care for the kids, you may have to have government assistance but to prove that you want your kids, it will be worth it! Next, find you a therapist and/or a best friend (or ride or die) to help you with your depression bc just bc you may possibly get your kids back, it can still appear in your life at different times. Last just constantly pray! None of us Mamas ever and I mean EVER figure this mama thing out!!! (If some say they do, they lie 
).
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If there’s a way for you to move away from your parents do it. Get your stuff together and serve them with Court papers to get your kids back. That’s what I did I had to move out of state and do it. You can work towards your dreams so your kid’s can be comfortable but you can’t change your mind about adoption.
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All of these comments all I can say is people shouldn’t judge she clearly has her own issues and imo to her would be I will keep you in my thoughts do lots of soul searching and please don’t read much into peoples judgements so many perfect people on here way to easy to cast judgement on this girl. I thought in reading her post she asked for opinions not judgements. My heart goes out to her yes she got herself into this mess but she also will be the one to get herself out of it. I hope she can find the answer to what is right for her and her baby from searching within and seeking professional guidance and what options she has. I wish her the best of luck for all involved and hope her parents come around and decide to help her instead of alienating her after all sometimes a family can help you get through anything.
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Adoption honestly with everything you have going on may sound like the best option
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Keep your baby, she won’t care if you are rich or broke, as long as you love and care for her. If you are finding things difficult seek help to sort your mental health out. If you and her Dad put your minds together you will be able to cope. Don’t focus on what you can’t give her or what you don’t have, focus on the positives. I am wishing you luck. You can do this!
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PlEASE contact Saving Our Sisters and the family preservation project here on face book! They have the resources to help you parent.
If Bonnie Hale would adopt your baby it would have a very good home and want for nothing. Bonnie and her husband are loving parents
I honestly considered giving my last baby I had up for adoption when I found out I was pregnant but now he’s a year old and god knew I needed him 
if u would like please message me!
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Please let parents raise, sign your rights off and get your tubes tide !!
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Adoption is a gift. I was an adopted child and I am so thankful to my birth parents for giving me up for adoption because I had the opportunity to have an amazing life with amazing parents. I had everything I could ever ask for in life and am very grateful for my life. I would love to adopt a child some day as well.
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If you’re iffy on it then don’t do it, I’m all for adoption but it seems like you don’t want to and will regret it big time later. I’d say keep the baby and fight for your other babies back.
If you were 100% sure I’d say go for adoption but like I said judging on this post you’d regret it.
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The truth isn’t always something people want to hear, but since you asked…your 23 and have 2 other children and now a third on the way. I’m assuming at least 2 different fathers, possibly 3. I didn’t hear a lot of accountability in the post. I really heard that you’re blaming not having your children on your parents and how they’ve lied and tricked you. Regardless, you should be thankful they are with family and not in the system. Obviously sounds like you also are choosing terrible men as fathers, as there’s no mention really of them being involved. The selfish thing to do would be to keep this child. What you need to do is work harder on yourself, use birth control, or stay away from men period, and focus on bettering yourself and being there for the children you already have.
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We can’t tell you what you need to do. Especially since we don’t know you or your situation. I will say, do what YOU feel is best. Not best for you, but best for your baby. Whether you decide to keep the baby or gift the baby to a loving home, neither decision is an easy one nor is either decision a selfish one.
Adoption, hell I would take your baby in a heart beat
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Put the baby up for adoption and go get your tubes tied.
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Get fixed and yes give the child up
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I almost gave my daughter up for adoption, 5 years later I am SO thankful I didn’t. From what you wrote I feel you’d be more depressed letting your baby girl go for adoption. No one can take her from you, yes the pain of the other two will always be there. But I am a very firm believer in things happen for a reason.
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I have such mixed feelings. Broke parents is not the excuse I want to hear about not keeping a child if you’re rich in love. Money is nice but honestly if it took money to have children none of us would be having them. I am concerned about toxic players in your life calling and making allegations to dhs and it seems the dhs these days have had such a bad reputation they are just taking children from parents for anything even though you should have had an opportunity to get your older children back and flabbergasted it doesn’t sound like you’ve gotten that opportunity. As much as putting your child up for adoption can cause the child trauma. In your situation it’s tough and I’d understand even feel you putting your baby up for adoption would be a living caring decision. But if you actually want this baby don’t let a holes in your life walk all over you!!! Kick them toxic trolls to the curb and make a life for yourself! And if your partner can’t take care of his own children you need to toss him bc what good is he, seriously. What kind of man can’t care for his own child?! Gosh that statement really put red flags up fpr me when you said you didn’t want to leave them with him because he’s never cared for children. He needs a chance and if it’s him that doesn’t want to do it he wouldn’t have any room in my life, he’d be worthless to have around. Can’t take care of his own child. My gosh. Take care. This is a tough but loving decision and it’s truly yours and the fathers. No one elses!
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I put two kids up for adoption when I was 15 and 16. It was the hardest thing of my life. They are 16 amd 17 and I still see them. But don’t let anyone make up your mind for you. Look into getting a lawyer for free legal aid should be able to help you. Message me if you need someone to talk to.
I had twins 3 years ago that I placed for adoption and a wonderful couple adopted theM. From the time I got pregnant I knew I could not care for them properly. I had a few times I went back and fourth on my decision but I knew what the right decision was. Would I give anything to have raise them absolutely but they are with the best mother I think anyone could of chosen. A family was blessed! It was and is not easy emotionally. There is open adoption and such. Not like the old days. If you are iffy I suggest really thinking it through. Consider contacting some agencies and seeing what they are about. Do not place just to get your fines paid. Anything that is paid typically comes from parents that are or will be adopting the child.
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It really boggles my mind how someone could literally say the words “I hate myself right now and don’t know what to do” and so many people continue to degrade and bash this woman. She is clearly already beating herself up over this so instead of adding fuel to the fire just be supportive and give advice without pointing fingers and making her feel even worse. You never know when it’s someone’s breaking point and you never know if that’s the comment that would cause someone to end their life. You never know so just be kind. It’s easy and free. It’s awful and I can only imagine how many of you claim to be a Christian.
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Some of these comments are god awful
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Need to get Chasity belt or some birth control
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By the sounds of things your in a rough situation. I think the children are fine where they are get your life together and get them back if that’s what you really want. Ask for visitation now. As for the child your carrying. Giving that child up for adoption to get the other two back is not going to help your situation at all. Get your ducks in a row for now
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You should consider allowing them to take the baby. Also you should look into long term birth control. Possibly getting tubes tied to avoid this hardship to continue happening.
It’s a tough decision but ultimately it’s what is best for the little ones.
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At what point do people stop laying down getting knocked up if all this already is issues
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You will.mosy likely regret it and u can always fight for your other children you still have time. Never give up
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First of all I’d like to say congrats to you for straightening your life up for your children and TRYING. That’s what matters. I know it can get very very hard at times, but don’t give up on the babies 
also, whoever is telling you this baby is better off with another family you need to cut them out of your life! If you are no danger to the child, have a job, and a stable roof over yours and the babies head that’s what matters 
if you believe it’s best for your mental health then yes do it but if you are having doubts right now, it’ll only get worse as you get further along. Best wishes 
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You should definitely think about it more. There is assistant for people in your situation. Maybe go see a therapist to work on your self. Try everything before givin in. At the end if the day you have to be able to make a clear decision on what’s best go for you and your family. I’d also consider maybe not having anymore kids after this.
Best of luck.
Do what u feel is best for your kids. If you cannot support them in all areas sometimes the best thing is to let someone who can. All the best to you. Sorry you are going through all of your troubles.
I hate to say this but,
Forget about your other children for a quick minute. Do YOU want this baby???
If you want her, keep her. Focus on her. Things are always more stressful when you’re rushing. You’re not getting the others back any time soon, so just focus on this one. Still send your love, see them, visit them, etc. But don’t focus on them. When they system sees how well you’re doing with this one, say in a year or two, you will be taken more seriously in your custody battle. OR if you don’t want this baby anyway, then place her for adoption. But still, take your time and focus on getting your life together well enough so that you can fight for them in a couple years if that’s what you still want.
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That’s a terrible situation momma. You can look into open adoptions, that way you could still be a part of the child’s life if you would like.
This broke my heart to read. I’m so sorry honey. I hope you find answers and peace. 
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I went thru a similar situation with my first baby. My parents took him when he was 4 and wouldnt let me see him. I was like u, didn’t want to move on and have more kids. I waited 17 years and decided I deserved to be happy. I had a lil girl at the age of 38 and her brother followed 15 months later. Well guess who followed a couple years after that, my oldest son that my parents took. He reached out to me after all them years. We have the best relationship and he lives with me now. Adoption doesn’t have to be goodbye…it can be see u later. The ball is in your court. Wishing u the very very best.
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You seem very confused at the moment. Mixed feelings. Maybe get your things together first, your kids are safe with the grandparents. You admit quite a few things was due to your own doings. Money seems to be the main reason u want to give the new baby up for adoption. As in not having enough money and the adoption being a way to earn money. I think raise this child of yours and prove yourself being a mother the other children deserve. Then your parents can see your ready to take them in
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Keeping this baby and showing everyone that you can and will be a good mom can help you get your other kids back. You would be showing the courts and your family that you can be a stable loving home for your children.
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It’s so easy to choose the path of self destruction especially when you’re already feeling incredibly low. The only person who can change your life around is you. I highly encourage you to choose yourself and your children over any man for the foreseeable future. This isn’t life being against you. It’s life trying to pull you in the correct direction for yourself and kids. You have a new start right in front of you and it won’t be easy by any means. The hardest fights we fight are within ourselves. You’re on state help - use it get into counseling work through your trauma and poor choices. Work hard and get yourself on track. Will having a baby in the middle be extremely hard? Absolutely, that’s an event in itself. But you can do it. You have to do it though. You have to make the calls, get the job, keep the job, get a reliable sitter and stop being a victim to life. Get yourself to therapy and doctors appointments and give yourself the love and attention you deserve. You cannot change the past but you can change your future. Regardless of what you choose with this baby you still owe it to yourself to get yourself taken care of.
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If you really want to keep this baby, keep it. But if you have any doubts at all that you don’t want it, please put it up for adoption! I’m a mother of an adopted son, I got him when he was a week old. We gave him a loving home, a family ! And she was able to go yo college and get married and have a family of her own. Everything worked out fine, and my son has thanked me many times for adopting him. He has had a great life, one that he may not have had if the mother had kept him. You have to think of your baby too, not just how much money you would get. I think you know what you need to do. I wish you the best!
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If you feel that you could offer this child a better quality of life over someone else, then definitely keep it. The court system is already stacked against you. It is rare they take a child from the mother unless other activities were involved, but in this situation you have to ask what would be best for this baby.
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Damn there is some judgmental cunts on here.
Listen!!! Adoption is permanent. It cannot be undone. Meanwhile, your parents claiming custody of your girls can be. Get help if you need it. There are many programs out there that will help you with legal fees once your prove you’re fit as a mother. And caring for a newborn the right way is hella proof.
I say all that, but must add, I see tons of unfit parents in my line of work. Every single time I’ve been called to court has been over treating an abused child. If you are unfit and you know it, then please give this baby a fighting chance in an already nasty enough world and let a loving and capable family raise her.
As a mom of 5, my heart breaks for you. Fortunately, I kept my head on straight and had tons of support raising my girls as a way too young mom, then I acquired two more through marriage, now expecting my 5th any day. Whatever you do, do it with love and not a tiny bit of selfishness.
Even though u dont have custody of your kids and you went through a rough time doesn’t make u a bad mom and always remind yourself of that. U asking this question shows how much u care about your children and your unborn baby but only you can know what is right. I always say God will never give u anything you can’t handle.
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My heart breaks for you.
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It would be the best thing for you and the baby. And you would make a big difference in someone’s life who can’t have children
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DO NOT HATE YOURSELF. The simple fact you are considering your unborn childs welfare before your own shows your a loving mother. We all make mistakes and sometimes trust the wrong people, people we should be able to count on. I didnt give my son up for adoption but sent him to his grandparents while i went through my divorce and later breakdown. When i asked for him back they refused. He has medical issues so when i sent him i granted temporary guardianship so they could see to his medical needs and school and such. When i asked for him back they refused and like you i am not able to afford an attorney. Now hes turning 16 and i only see him a couple of times a month. It hurts but i hang on to what i can get. Before giving your baby up, i recommend seeing a therapist to address your depression and such. Because depression can make us do drastic things. Maybe therapy can help you develop the confidence as a mother back up so you may wanna keep your new baby. But dont make any decisions while you are depressed. You may regret it after.
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Keep your daughter and FIGHT for all three…fight to be the momma this little one deserves and fight for PJ and AI…you can do this…set your mind to it…grab this situation by the balls and show ALL them girls and the WHOLE world what you are really made of!! You are strong and you are a fighter …don’t give up show them all that momma can do right by them…I KNOW YOU CAN:heart:
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Don’t ever give up a baby that you want. You will regret it forever and wonder what could’ve been. I am sorry your parents are so awful, just keep on fighting for your children. It’s not too late. Never give your parents the opportunity to even watch this new baby compared to what they did with the others. You are a good mother for coming on here to even ask this. Like others said, cut the people out who told you to put your baby up for adoption that they’d be better off. I had to do the same and I’m better off without those people. My baby is almost 5 now with a newborn on the way. You’ll be okay Mama.
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I also have a troubled past. I lost 2 kids to the system 11 years ago. I straightened up my life… I got pregnant again and struggled sooooo hard with the fact that it felt like I was replacing the children I no longer had. But I had my daughter, Kaiya. She is now 6. It was the best decision I ever made in my life. I love her so much, and she helped heal me. I am by no means rich. But we make it. I am also a server. You can do it.
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They will give you parents chance to take kids first so they can be with family x
I think you should get in to therapy asap! And talk to them about it and really think of your options. From your post it really does seem you are struggling with this. You want your children, you can get them back and NEVER give up on that fight till they are home with you and continue to do everything you are doing plus more get visitations don’t stop at No from your parents fight them you have that right and save every conversation With them.
But for the baby you are carrying, you need to see a therapist and seriously consider all things. Wright down all your thoughts and reread them over and over again and you will find in your thoughts what you really want to do. Maybe keeping the baby will be best for you and your boyfriend. If you give the baby up will it bring more depression and heart ache to you?? Will this make you more depressed to keep the baby?? Does your boyfriend want the baby?? Your parents can’t get this baby, but they will be mad if you do go through with adoption and fight you later with the 2 you have and hold that over you. These are questions you need to ask your self and Wright down and reread and re-answer over and over until you can see the answer clearly !!! Get a journal today and just start wrighting your thoughts down. Good luck mama !
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I’ll adopt her for you:sob: good luck mama! When the time comes you’ll know what too do!
You have to do what’s best for your children! It’s not about
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You’re very brave to accept your faults! I don’t know what the right answer is for you but as for your 2 children now- if they’re safe and happy- please allow yourself time to get your life in order and then one foot in front of the other to get them back. Take this as an opportunity to work on yourself- your children will benefit from it in the long run. God bless.
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I’m thinking that you should look into “internal” options of contraception. No offense intended but read your post as an outsider… what would your advice “to you” be? Seems like you’re looking for justification but your mind is already made up. Make another person happy, fill their world and then restart your journey with gratitude.
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I’m so sorry your going through all of this! I wish you luck and hope everything turns out ok for you and your baby’s! Just keep fighting for what you want and love, keep your head up and don’t give up! Whether you give this baby up for adoption or not just remember it’s your choice forget and don’t listen to everyone else do what ever you feel in your heart is best for you and your baby’s! You can get through this keep Faith and have Hope!
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It doesn’t matter what everyone else wants. If you want to keep this baby do it you will regret it later And then fight fight fight for your other babies.
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Here is the beauty - You have choices! Take some time. Adoption agencies make you go thru free counseling to see if you are SURE OR NOT- if its the right thing. You can start this now and not make a final decision till later.
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First dnt hate yourself we all make mistakes!!! Get into a Godly church or at the least get on your knees and pray!!! My heart goes out to you!!! We just moved to Cathage Texas if we’re close to you message me!!! And if not still message me!! I have 7 kids and 6 grandkids!!! Im a good listener just said a prayer for you sweetie remember God ALWAYS LOVES YOU NO MATTER WHAT
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Tough decisions ahead of you. If you do put the baby up for adoption you will make someone so happy. And that baby will be loved. You could have any open adoptation where you still see your kids Grow up… You already are being so responsible to consider your choices. I would talk to a therapist…
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I respect your choice to put your baby up for adoption as opposed to abortion.
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If you really wanted to get your other kids back then you would have already been working on that there are many services available to you that you could get like a indegent attorney yes you can be given a free attorney you have to petition the court for this been here done this second you have had plenty of time from baby one to this baby to make changes in your life like a better paying job counseling parenting classes there is so many things you could be doing to get your other 2 kids back but I believe if we ask the grandparents they will have a totally different story on why they felt it necessary to go take custody of their grandbabies you need to grow up and from a parent who has adopted the best thing you can do for this baby is to give it a chance at a happy healthy childhood one they can grow from not one they need therapy for just saying you obviously aren’t ready to be a full-time parent if you truly wanted those babies back you would already be in the process not crying on social media about how awful it is that your parents took your babies you should be thanking them and asking them is there anything they need that I can help with sorry hunny but you seem entirely to immature at this point you need to reflect back and ask how did I get here and how do I get out of here
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The fact that you are cool considering this
tells me you want the new baby to have a life full filled with a family that can finally achieve their dream of a child.
Kudos for being this person.
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Sounds like you’d rather keep your baby, so just keep her. You’ll be even more broken if you gave her up. It sounds like you’d regret it so much that you’d go in a downward spiral. Keep her 
Do not do something you will regret in the long run. Keep that baby. Get up every day and grind for them babies! Get your kids back and learn to love your life mama!!
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Id adopt her for you. You’ll no what to do and whats in the best interest of your child.
Every parent struggle with at times I say you should keep this baby so that way you can show your parents and the courts and whoever else that you can take care of your kids. Show them that you are a loving mother and that you are fighting to have all of your kids back in the same home. It may be very hard it may take a while but it will be well worth it when you have all of your kids back. Same for the father you both work save money and do this together everybody struggles but when your mother and the court see that you can and will take care of business like a mother should it will make you feel a whole lot better.
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Only you can make that decision.
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I think the baby would do better if she was put up for adoption. I mean that in the nicest way possible. If you did, it would make a family very happy and you would know she would go to a good home. I would focus on getting your other children back. I feel like you should really try getting more into their lives. Maybe think about having children once you’re in a good spot with your current ones.
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Birth control is free when you have Medicaid
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If you read this, please send me a message please
You really need to let someone else raise this baby and give her a stable home that will treat her as a precious gift. I don’t know how good your parents are with your other children. It may be hard for them to take on a third child. It is a shame you would even choose a concert over your children much less a child that is not well! I don’t believe you have changed enough to be a good mother. You don’t seem to even recognize how irresponsible it is. Time with your children would always take precedence over a concert. Please give your infant a chance at a good life with parents that will raise her as a newborn through adulthood!
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Your parents will adopt her this is crazy. They took the other two kids for a reason. And u got pregnant again wow
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I think you need to get on some kind of birth control.
Three children you are unable to care for is three too many.
Thank God your parents have stepped in for your two older children.
And stop blaming them, you know they would be in a bad way living with you. You haven’t the means.
Please get your life in order.
Please get some help, counseling.
Please make a plan for your life.
Please make a budget.
Please help yourself.
No one can help you if you do not put in the work.
I wish you and yours well.
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I think adoption is best for baby
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Follow your heart…put your children’s future above your feelings and do what is best for them. Nothing great is ever easy
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Thank you for your helpful comments. I was on verge of suicide last night, woke up to fight more this morning. Yes that is actually what happened. A cold, my parents hated my views, they didn’t raise. I met my bio father when I was 16 and step mother who is 8yrs older than me.
My father lies a lot. He has my whole life. I should have known better and listened to my grandma when she said not to let my baby go see that man. He is angry over my mother taking me from him. And me turning out like my mother. My mother is dead now, what a surprise right? I’m stressed pulling my hair out. When my mom died and My father took my oldest girl. I found drugs, pills. I loved xanax it nummbed me. I stopped talking to my parents unless it was for visits. But they stopped my visits when they found out about my use, I never came to see my kid high. But I smelled like weed so they tested me I was 20 at the time. They sent me to rehab and promised My daughter back. I graduated rehab and never went bavk to the pills other than ONE relapse in 3 years… yeah I still smoke pot, but my parents don’t mind the weed. They told I’d never get my kids bavk if I was STRIPPING for money… I had to dance to be able to get a home and car for my girls which is exactly what I did. I had to quit dancing because My father WANTED to see me struggle in a Cafe. With 400$ a month child support, 650 rent 250 car insurance app 3 utility’s, no food stamps… list goes on, I have my 15yr old boy cousin living with me the past 2 years… it’s pure crazy over here. I foster animals and I have had steady work since I was 16 years old, I’ve never gone longer than 3 weeks with no work. I used to be a CNA but once I was depressed after they took my other kid I hated my life and left CNA and got charges now I can’t go bavk for 3 years till my charges are dropped. My father told me that that no one wants me here, that I can bring a stripper pole to Thanksgiving and they’ll throw pennies at me for half time entertainment… he is a perverted guy always taking about sex so me and Mt kids dad can’t stand being near him. For all of those saying there is more to the story, you’re right. There is more. More on my dad’s side. More on me fighting everyday for years sober and working trying to pull life together in thus economy!!! I can’t afford lawyers. Maybe it’s the pregnancy driving me insane??? I’ve never battled hurting thus hard before, it makes me vomit with the stress instead of morning sickness. I have everything thus baby could possibly need, I watch parenting videos each day and earn baby bucks to buy baby stuff from a nice baby shop, it’s all nice baby stuff too… my kids dad makes me fucking hate him some days even tho he tries man he really does. 
want to say screw this I’m out, but it’s my oldest who knows me and I don’t want to hurt her. They took my other baby when she was 5 months old she will be 2 next March. Haven’t seen her since, only have 5 photos from them to me… and I only get those when I pay for them and send some type of money. They don’t ask for the payment and I don’t say that’s what it’s for, but anytime I send money. I get an old ohoto of each girl I didn’t Have before… it’s messed up, I hate my self so much, my life would be great if I could afford a lawyer to look at my screemshots I’ve saved over years. I have a house and job a car and my kids dad and pets that love me, why should I want to kill my selfright? ? Ugh. I’m confused, my parents said to me other night “we were just telling you a week ago how we might give you a chance now your talking about killing yourself”? Then asked for more child support.
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Quit getting pregnant use birth control
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You seem to struggle with this decision, so I’d say keep your baby and work your butt off to get your other two back. Being a great mom to baby will help as well when the courts look at your case when fighting for your other two. If you must do adoption maybe consider open adoption or foster care instead so you can get her back later and be a part of her life.
A infant is also not a cure for your depression and clearly you need to self sacrifice for the sake of this baby and your other children. You need some time to grow up some more.
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umm no hating urself wtf.
My ex raised my first two.
What kind of support do you have other than friends and family do you have any professional support? Like Peer Support?
With Facebook and stuff… Your kids mite look you up in a couple of months lol kids and technology. Get ready. Please consider getting professional support. There are some excellent counselors…u can ask some questions before you stay…if you want. You still have the bottom line it just gives more ideas…
Watch that self talk!
((Don’t take some of these negative heifers words to heart. Message me anytime lol I think I might be getting suspended or booted from this page.))
Give the baby to your parents instead of punishing it and then get yourself fkn fixed. You probably won’t ever get your first two back
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You should be thanking them for taking your first two children and not blaming them!
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I’m sorry to read this. In all honesty, you need to go to counseling. You need to figure a lot of things out and only qualified people can help you not people on the internet. People on the internet don’t know the whole story of what you are going through and what you need. I hope you realize that you are not in good place right now and get the help you need. If you don’t think you can do it for yourself, please do it for your children❤️ If you need to talk to someone, please message me and I’ll do my best to be there for you. I’ve been through some stuff myself when I was younger and no one can make these decisions for you except you.
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Sounds like ya need to what ya have to in order to get it together and get your kids back - however sounds like you expect to be paid to give your baby up? Adoptive parents if found early enough and done the right way- usually cover your out of pocked medical expenses and expenses related to your pregnancy- you don’t just get a check for handing over a child - that’s illegal.
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Honestly adoption is a good option. Giving this baby a chance at a good life is better than having it struggle along with you.
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First off, I wouldn’t hate yourself due to the condition of your life… that being said yes, I feel the child should be placed up for adoption or placed with your parents as you are very young and young minded as well by what you have said. You still need ALOT of growing up and maturing to be the mother and adult your kids need. Children are not a way out and no if you place one up for adoption it DOES NOT allow for you to get your kids back… you have to work hard for that, on your own… a new job, friend group, lifestyle etc. Without proving you have improved your life for them, you won’t get them back. Also please get on birth control.