Advice? It’s about the child, not your feelings anymore. You don’t share a relationship with that man anymore but you do share a child so get over yourself. That girl can love her father and wear a shirt that says it!!! Wtf??
It’s clear the pain he caused/s you … Is still there. I’m sorry. I know what that feels like. And it sounds like he may care more about himself than others. Having said that even if you were to bring it to his attention or discuss it with him chances are it wouldn’t matter. And I hate to say this but as long as he treats your daughter right and she’s happy that’s what matters most. If he doesn’t well that’s another conversation all together. And far more important than a t-shirt that feeds his ego. I hope that you can move on and feel better.
Answering your question: yes you are way overreacting it. Get over it. Buy a t-shirt for her that says love my mum. End of story
Wow sound like jealousy to me. It’s a shirt and u need to get over it! U having a problem with the shirt just sounds selfish to me!
Send her back in a " my girl loves her momma" ( or something similar) tshirt.
I feel its fine don’t stress yourself over it he is her dad
I don’t think they make “I love my sometimes present dad” shirts 
I’m sorry but I’m not understanding why that would upset you? Children can love more than 1 person, just like adults. You sound very childish…
So next time you send her over there have her wear a shirt that says I love mom more!! Get even thats the best revenge without hurting anyone or anything pay it back to him and send the shirt back with her that he bought too 
I wouldn’t say anything.if he wants to be petty let him.
Your kid can’t even read so it’s definitely not a thing your child does not even know! but your ex emphasis on x still has issues or is totally insensitive or it was a harmful jab at you or due to his insensitivity he just doesn’t really care in any case keep the focus on your baby emphasis on your child 
and let go of the past 
children want to love both their parents and that’s the way it should be any Petty garbage that you two have between you should stay there.
Ummm…overreacting much. Is he a good dad? Is he obviously buying her clothes? Is he spending time with her? Get over yourself. Theres 2 parents.
Your feelings are valid. I don’t allow my kid to wear anything that has “daddy loves me” or some shit like that, because it’s a lie.
If he sent her in an obscene it inappropriate shirt- go ahead lose your shit.
A shirt that says I love my dad? Come on!
That is standard in the selection for clothing for toddlers by default and you admit she loves her dad ;what is the problem?
The shirt isn’t about your feelings.
It’s a shirt. Please move on.
Dig deeper into your emotions & find the reasons you feel that way over it. Sorry people are so rude in these comments & act as if they know what is the cause of your feelings. Whatever it is, try working on letting them go & instead look at things in another way if possible. Be grateful even when it’s hard to see the good in things, remember there is a world full of people in which many only wish for things you do have. Inner healing is the best.
2nd post from the poster. The t-shirt was given by thr cholds dad. It’s an item of clothing. Pick your battles. You have the issue not your child or their father.
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Set ur feelings aside it’s not about u or him anymore it’s about her once she reads what u gonna do when she wants to wear a shirt that says that it’s the same as u putting one that says I love mommy hopefully u can over come ur feelings and let it go don’t be bitter think about ur baby girl and her feelings
Its not like it says " I love just daddy and not mommy!! " … just buy a shirt that says I love mommy so u can move on
- We don’t know the background of these people. We have NO idea if he was Persnickety, just plain mean or even Emotionally Abusive.
- Some 4 year olds Can read.
- We do not even know what their Custody status is or their visitation schedule.
- Sometimes things ARE done with Spite.
IE. “Forgetting” to send home the clothes that the Child(ren) took with for visitation time.
“Forgetting” to have Child(ren)'s homework completed and checked before bringing home on Sunday. - Unless you know what their actually, totally going through perhaps this should be remembered when responding.
It is just a shirt! Pick your battles wisely…it"s not like he sent her home in a f##k you shirt…in my opinion hon…this is really no big deal! Hugs to you…
Yes you’re over reacting and also putting your feelings before your daughter’s
Absolutely overreacting! You have a lot to learn about co-parenting. You’re feeling is based on what you experienced in the relationship, that’s not at all fair.
You are being ridiculous. If this is you’re biggest concern in life then things sure are rough. Lol Its a shirt. He bought it for her so she can wear it. And you crying about it sure says alot!
Sounds like you still want him and bothered because maybe he’s moved on. Girl your feelings is why he’s not around you. Make it about your child not you it’s only a shirt
Let go. Wash the shirt and send her wearing it back to him. Heck let her wear it if she picks it out with you. She needs you to be selfless when it comes to her daddy… (I have 3 well adjusted adult children raised in a broken home)
Ur over reacting get out of ur head ur taking it personal ur still dealing with hurt feelings from ur relationship with dad and that’s unfair to ur daughter it’s just a t-shirt
I think you are over reacting and that he’s not required to think about how a shirt he bought special for his daughter makes you feel.
Sometimes I buy clothes for our boys and I don’t even read the words:rofl:
Does it really matter what it says I mean was her clothes clean ? That all that should matter tbh !!
Honestly I would just let it go. It’s perfectly normal to feel annoyed and salty and you have every right to feel so. But own the feelings, process and accept them and then just let it go. It’s not worth it to dwell on them or turn It into a fight.
Buy her a i love mommy shirt and send her to her dads with it on plain and simple nothing to be upset about
You sound a bit crazy! Sorry to say that. Be grateful he IS in your kiddos life! It’s not about you or him anymore but about your child !
Who cares if he got him a shirt with dad on it. What if you did that too and it said mom?! I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t care. Don’t make it a big deal instead tell him that’s a cute shirt!
It’s a SHIRT and she does love her dad. Not everything is a spiteful act or meant to get a rise out of you. Chill out.
A child is not a pawn in a divorce. Be glad he wants to be in her life, get over it there are too many important things that are going to take place in her life that she needs the both of you to attend. Learn to get along and go on with yur life
Yes, you’re overreacting. It’s about your daughter. If he is childish enough to do it to irritate you, then he won this one.
Get over it there is definitely worse things that could happen. She could come home saying her step brother molested her & her own dad doesn’t believe her… really worse things that could happen…
At some point you probably loved her dad as well. I hope you don’t act this petty in front of your daughter. Don’t let your feelings toward your ex shine on your child.
You should have grown up a little more before you had a child cus you sound like a child yourself! Its a freaking shirt smh
As boys mom if dad bought the shirt maybe he thought it was cute and wanted her to have it she doesn’t need to feel like she has to choose
Your feelings don’t matter. That’s not being mean either. I’m not saying he’s not being malicious but wtf cares if he is. She’s 4 pick your battles a t-shirt is not where you want to stage a battle. You deep inside need to practice this and chant it as often as you can.
DONT SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF. I say this with all honesty even though he’s not present like you want him to be it wont turn out in your favor to act how you feel over a shirt. It’s good to tell us here and get it out and have ppl to talk to about how you feel just don’t ever let him know it upset you don’t cry Infront of him because if doesn’t care about the way you feel he never will and acting emotional around him only gives him ammo to call you crazy when you make him mad.
My ex has been known to be pretty spiteful and so if she came home in a shirt that said “I love dad” I would def give it an eye roll. However, I’m passed getting angry at him or being petty or getting even.
It’s just a shirt. She was at her dads house and maybe that’s the only clean shirt he had for her and put her in it then sent her back to you in it. Don’t waste your time being upset over the small things. Life is too short.
First, that’s really childish. Second, your feelings are not his concern. Get over it. Some people really needs to pick their battles and let the little stuff go. This isn’t about your daughter at all, it’s about you and it should never be about you.
It’s a shirt wash it send it back with her . Grow you your got a lot more import things to focus on as a single mom ,. Good luck
Please stop, the child is 4. Let her wear the shirt and leave it alone. Her relationship and love for her father has nothing to Do with how the father treated you during your time together. Let it go.
no way, lately some of the “messages” on here are just…I have a word but it’s too harsh. Please please whomever she is let her read all these comments and hopefully she will seek some therapy and medical attention or something. Because come on now 
Sorry but your feelings are not one of his main priorities anymore, your daughter’s is.
In saying that, I’m sure he’d take your feelings into consideration and honestly, it’s a shirt.
I’m also sure he would not even bat an eyelid if she came to him wearing an ‘I love Mummy’ top.
Just because you and him split up does not mean you need to control every aspect of his time with his daughter, including what she wears whilst with him…
For all you know, she could have picked it herself and wanted to show you her ‘new shirt’.
Time to put your emotions aside and put your daughter’s emotions and feelings first - you want to encourage and strengthen her relationship with her Dad, not break it.
Wow it’s just a shirt be thankful he is spending money on your daughter
You are definitely over reacting. Please seek counseling to address any bitterness from this previous relationship before you move to your next relationship.
He probably just put that on her so he can make sure to get it back. Or it was the only thing clean, etc.
WOW how immature is this?!
Only because you have ill feelings towards the dad doesn’t mean your daughter has them. All she knows is that she loves her dad. Grow up.
So a shirt that talks about loving her dad made you mad. I feel like your reading to deep into the shirt. Dont let the little things irritate you. If this isnt gonna be a thought in a week why would you let it bother you. Also you left him for a reason so why would you let something trivial get under your skin. Dont let simple situations wreck havoc on your peace.
Dang. I feel for that 4 year old if this is the level you’re at now… you have a very long road ahead of you of co-parenting.
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Why don’t you buy her a shirt that says I love mom on it??? Yeah definitely overreacting. He may not be in her life as much as you’d like but at least he is in her life some. Don’t covey your personal feelings concerning over onto her. Nobody wins that way.
Honestly, ya that’s a little dumb. But yes, I would send her back wearing the shirt 
or pack it with her clothes and keep giving it back 
I’m sorry, there is an extreme over reaction here. As you stated yourself, your daughter does love her dad. So… why should she not be able to express that because of your feelings toward him? That’s selfish.
Lol. Girl get over it, he doesn’t have to care about your feelings, it’s about your daughter, I don’t see anything wrong with the shirt
Yes you are overreacting!
I am a new grandmother to a three month old infant. I have seen the beautiful little onesies that say my grandma loves me.
I refrained from purchasing the shirt because I wasn’t sure if my daughter-in-law would feel like you just felt and probably not put it on the baby.
I will only say this
Yes you are the mother and you gave birth to the baby but you must realize that the baby is a completely separate person and has his or her own relationship with many other people apart from yourself.
I raised one son and I was mindful of this fact as he grew into the wonderful gentleman that he is.
While I do think you are over reacting a bit, the comments are a bit much too. 
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Clothes are clothes thats one less t shirt YOU have to buy her. If it bothers you let it be a play shirt for her to get dirty painting pics or at the park. You shouldnt not let her wear it though. Its a gift from her daddy
Yes, you are overreacting. This whole post is completely egocentric and immature.
It’s not about you. It’s about her. That’s her dad. If she loves him, let her wear it
I’m sorry. But I rolled my eyes so hard. I hate my daughters dad and I BUY HER CLOTHES THAT SAY I LOVE MY DADDY! Lol!!! Shes also 4.
You could be upset if the shirt said “my mom is a porn star”. But “I love my Dad”??? Seriously???
Choose your battles this is only the beginning she’s only 4! Believe me you’ll have way more important things to debate in the future. 
Okay if she loves him then what’s wrong with it ? It’s just a shirt
I dont know if you meet to swap the kiddo. Could alway bring a change of clothes, have him have his own clothes. Shouldn’t have to provide nothing for the stay
Your not overreacting your hurt you expected him to be a better father and partner to you and that didn’t.come to pass your feeling are valid take a deep.breath and let it go send her back with the same.shirt on and say nothing it’s ok to have feelings it’s ok for it to bother you but it’s not ok at make a big deal about it.or make your daughter aware of the pain it causes you you got this mama this shits not easy but your feelings are in face valid you wanted to love her dad wanted the family to be strong full of love and such and it sucks that that is not the case sending you love and strength
Even if he’s the worst dad in the world a shirt doesn’t matter! Very petty it’s a shirt life goes on!
It’s clothing. It really isn’t a big deal. Whether he’s a stand up number one dad or a dad “for show” it really doesn’t matter. It’s a shirt. Im sure the intent wasn’t to hurt your feelings and could have even came from a purchase her grandparents made ect. Their will be bigger issues to worry about/be upset over throughout the course of being a parent, please learn to let go of the little things and for heaven’s sake pick your battles. This is petty and immature.
I would hate to have you as a baby mama because you mad about something that simply… I can just imagine 
Wtf its a shirt and come on really dnt do that. i get shirts like that for my kids and maybe you feel sum kinda way about him still thats why u feelin like that.
Really… I mean, what. Yes you are def over reacting here. It’s a shirt and like you said she can’t even read yet. Likely a family member bought it. I’m sure she loves her dad as well as her mom.
Nothing wrong with it… you shouldn’t be so upset!!!
Guess what? You not supporting and encouraging this relationship is part of the barrier keeping him from being the dad you want him to be. Support him. Encourage him. Your relationship does not end in a court of law. It ends when one of you dies. Until then you are a team and if you are pulling most of the weight then welcome to motherhood. Focus on what he does right. He’s not going to take your place in her heart. She has a heart big enough to love lots of people but she needs mommy to show her how it’s done. It will absolutely make being from a broken home less traumatic.
Tthere is no way to be nice whem i say this. But grow up and get over it. Its a shirt. You are being extremely immature.
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What if she was wearing a shirt that said Friday and it’s actually Tuesday? Would that upset you too? Lol it’s just a shirt. She can’t even read.
Girl don’t do that you worried about the wrong thing if it makes u feel better get her one that says mini mama
Overreacting. You talk about better and more present but he still sees his daughter which says something
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Your feelings don’t count here. He is HER dad. He’s not your dad nor your spouse. Not everything is about you. Their relationship isn’t your business in that sense.,
It’s a shirt - pick your battles. This isn’t one of them. And you’re apart for a reason, so if you allow a shirt to squash your feelings you’re going to be getting stomped on often.
Grow up. Your feelings don’t matter. The child’s feelings do.
Maybe he did it to make you mad. Maybe she picked the shirt out because it was petty. Maybe she asked to wear it home. Regardless, if this is the biggest issue And worry you have with your ex then you are extremely lucky.
“the lack of thought on his part” come on. He’s not with you. Why should he think of your feelings at all if he’s not with you? 
Sounds like your mad about his lack of commitment than an actual shirt. Sometimes we have to dig deep to really work through what we are actually upset about. My first two kids father did a lot of things that wasn’t responsible, he died in a tragic accident at work, we would give anything to deal with those things again.
Parents buy shirts like that all the time why would u think its am attack towards u… He probably wasn’t even thinking about u when he bought it… Pick ur battles it seems like ur searching for things to be pissed off at him for… 
You need more sex in your life to spend some of that wasted energy being upset about something this trivial
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U r being extremely petty, very childish and should seek professional help 2 deal with the issues u have in regards 2 your ex.
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Seriously? It’s not like it said I hate my Mom so where’s the issue?
Everyone saying “I’m sure he didn’t do it to upset you” could be wrong. My ex buys things like this because it annoys me as he’s not very active either (recently been stepping it up not that she’s in school lol) but I just don’t them on my daughter when she’s with me🤷♀️ if she picks it out thats fine but I usually just wash and have it wear it back to his house at the next visit
He probably had a nice time with her and bought her a shirt to commemorate. What’s wrong with loving her Daddy? 
We can all see the reason you split up and it has nothing to do with him not considering your feelings. Your “feelings “ are absurd and unreasonable. Grow up lady and get some counseling.
OMG who is the child here ? Its just a shirt, she didn’t pick it out, it could say " I love Homer" and it would mean the same thing to her. Let it go Mom !! It’s just a piece of clothing nothing more. You need to be the grownup in this situation. He probably bought it just to get your goat. And it worked.
Get over it. Smh of all the things going on in the world and ur worried bc she loves her daddy. Um do u know how many kids that don’t have a father and would do anything for a father figure, and here u are having an issue w I love my daddy shirt. Why r u jealous of their relationship? Get counseling before this escalates.
Seems like you’re worried about the wrong thing here. Why should it matter what the clothes say as long as its not inappropriate. Sounds like you’re possibly mad about something else.
Well considering he sent her home with it… he must be involved enough to have had her with him & buying it for her so what’s the big deal
I have no idea why in the world this would upset you and am sorry to say yes I think you are overreacting.
You’re supposed to want your child to love their father…
You are over reacting:person_facepalming:
Really just let it go it’s a damn shirt is it really hurting anyone??? Will her wearing the shirt matter in 5 years nope!!! Let it go
Good lord…this is a thing? Don’t be that type of mom…please; for the sake of your kid. Me and my ex husband split for numerous reasons(verbal abuse,mental abuse, lying, addiction) We both moved on and our daughter is now 4. I had this same thing happen. He sent her back to me in a shirt that says " I love my daddy" I inside laughed and let it be, she wanted to wear that shirt so I let her. I sent her back in that shirt and that’s the end of story. I don’t talk trash about him near her, when someone talks badly about him in front of her, I change subject and don’t make remarks. Me and him co parent very well even though we think very poorly of each other at times. You got to put feelings like this in a mental box and toss it away because if your kid sees you think poorly of thier vision of either of you; they will harbor that emotion and in time change thier vision of you. So when shit like this happens to me and he sends her in dad shirts, I say " wow awesome shirt it says" I love my daddy"!" Because I know she loves her daddy despite our differences. Let your kid make thier our heart paths, don’t aid into the bitterness…just be the bigger person and be the best mother for your kiddo.
The four agreements help me so much. ‘Don’t take anything personally’.
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Babe, there are much bigger issues in life that you should be tending your attention to…