Wow. Welp. Here’s my two cents…
Get help. For yourself.
Hes treating ur kid as his own. So why dick down a dude that’s “inappropriately” cuddling? Are you jealous? Look. She’s a kid. Kids cuddle. They like to cuddle. Im not a cuddly person. That doesn’t mean im gonna accuse my husband of having an inappropriate relationship with my kids he stepped up for. WHEN HE DIDN’T HAVE TO. im blunt. Not nice nor concerned about feelings.
Did u sleep with him for financial stability and in ur twisted mind, ur worried ur FOUR YEAR OLD is gonna take that from you???
WHO TF IS JEALOUS OF A 4 YEAR OLD!?
Is he watching porn with her and getting a boner? No? Then knock ur abusive bullshit off. Get help.
A lot of things going on here.
- If you’ve expressed that you’re uncomfortable and he still does it, that’s disrespectful.
- If you’re uncomfortable because you think he’d touch her, you need to get yourself and your children away from him.
- You need to see how your daughter feels about it and ask her questions
6 Likes
If u don’t trust him to cuddle ur kids and to be a father then u shouldn’t be with that man. Any doubt in your mind that he’s gonna act inappropriately means leave him or else stop making something innocent weird.
4 Likes
I cuddled with my dad into preteen years and I still peck him on the mouth and face when I see him. I never felt uncomfortable. We’ve just always been affectionate. Now, my girls love cuddling up on daddy when he is home, we’re all just very affectionate. But I know some families and people who will say their daughters can’t even sit on their own daddy’s lap.
You want to marry him but treat him like a pedophile. If you think he’s capable of doing that then obviously you need to leave… wtf.
8 Likes
Why is it wrong for him to show your kids he loves them? Unless there is more to the story…
1 Like
Get into some counseling. If you think its wrong it could be something internal or something is actually wrong. My step dad cuddled with me and NEVER ONCE acted inappropriately.
Okay… so honest question? Were you abused as a child? It sounds like you are projecting your past pain onto your partner and children and may not even realize it. There is nothing wrong with a step parent cuddling with a child… he was probably laying down first and she came for a cuddle. Unless you have reason to believe there is sexual intent I wouldnt worry. Perhaps (if you were abused) you should seek a counselor to talk about your trauma… I speak from experience. I worry constantly about my children being molested by people in a caregiving role. But never their father, not in a million years would I worry about that. Back when things were better and we saw his other children (long story of alienation) I used to cuddle with his daughter and she would even call me mama… I would have been heartbroken if he thought me cuddling her was inappropriate.
I sincerely hope you get through this. It must be really hard on your mind heart and soul .
9 Likes
If you cuddle her as a “parent” then why shouldnt he be able to? If you love, respect and trust ur HUSBAND that u chose then you shouldnt have to worrie about anything being wrong with it.
2 Likes
I’d be pissed of someone told me I couldn’t cuddle my kids or treated me like a predator for doing so.
I can’t imagine how terrible he must feel.
Have you thought about family counseling? If this is a YOU problem and not that he’s giving you cause for concern, you’ll want to work this out before you break him.
5 Likes
The better question that we would all need to know before giving any real advice , is WHY do u feel
It’s inappropriate? Cause a 100% normal situation, there is nothing wrong with a dad snuggling his kids, boy or girl or step or biological. So I would think the why is much more important here. Why does it bother you? I think why you feel this way needs to be explored more before anyone can decide if you are being unreasonable
7 Likes
My husband (my oldest 2 kids stepdad) cuddles my oldest when she needs it…I think it’s perfectly fine
Your wrong! If you can’t trust him to cuddle with the kids why are you having kids with him and keeping him around?
5 Likes
Would you say anything about him cuddle your other daughter? Do you trust him? I can understand why he’s mad. You basically told him you don’t trust him with your daughter.
1 Like
When it comes to your kids… TRUST NO ONE!!! friend or family member, even your significant other! If it makes you uncomfortable then stick to your gut feeling!!!
2 Likes
I don’t mean to sound nasty here but were you abused by a close male figure in your life? Or has he given you a reason to think he’s being inappropriate? If so I actually agree with everyone else, stop making babies with and and stop being with him. Think of how she would feel if he only did cuddle his biological child… how hurtful and what an awful message to send to her.
6 Likes
Yeah, you’re VERY wrong for either 1 of 2 reasons.
Either you think a father shouldn’t be able to show his children affection simply because he’s the opposite sex. Or you’re sleeping with a man who you think is capable of the most egregious act. Which ever is your reasoning; you’re wrong.
20 Likes
You’re wrong. Why would you immediately think so very sour of the situation?! If you think like that why are you in the relationship?! My sisters step father and her are very close. He’s raised her since she was 4. Back at that age I would never have a problem with them cuddling smh
1 Like
And if they are “spooning” its not always sexual. My daughter and I “spoon” and she is big spoon to her daddy 
. Not all our adult postions are sexual with kids and sure as hell shouldnt be considered that way.
3 Likes
My daughter and her step dad cuddle all the time. If you don’t trust him then he shouldn’t be watching your daughter nor should you be with him ! He took on a role to be her 2nd father and father to her siblings. Not some random dude
3 Likes
-
Youre gonna teach your daughter to be scared of him.
-
Why marry a man you dont trust.
-
Youre gonna pull him away from her which is gonna hurt the both of them and leave problems at home.
6 Likes
If you feel is wrong for what ever reason trust your gut . It is normal for us to cuddle with our children that being said if for what ever reason you don’t trust him pls make sure she is not alone with him ever . This is a woman telling you that has been touched as a girl and it took me 20 years to overcome it . You are your daughter hero and protector pls make sure she is safe . But most of all trust your gut
1 Like
I would start with talking to your daughter about different touches, what’s ok and what is NOT ok. Use proper terms too so she gets comfortable using them. I agree with you though, I wouldnt feel comfortable with it either and he needs to respect you on that. I also agree that if you think he would harm your daughter that you need to get her out of harm’s way ASAP, whether that means leaving him or making him leave.
1 Like
Fuck that. I’d leave you for even hinting I was doing inappropriate stuff with my kids.
Either way you’re wrong.
1 Like
Why are you with someone you don’t TRUST??? Your oldest is going to feel some type of way knowing he loves his kids and cuddles with them but not her… I say if you don’t trust him with her you shouldn’t be with him
3 Likes
I fully believe in trusting your gut however I feel a lot of info is missing here. We’re you sexually abused as a kid? Has he done something you feel is inappropriate in the past? I guess my main question would be why you don’t trust him cuddling with her but you trust him to watch her when you are not around. If he was sexually abusing her I don’t think he would still be cuddling her when you came home. I wouldn’t be bringing more children into the world with a man that I think would abuse my kids. I think if you are asking him to parent a kid that’s not his then you need to respect the relationship they develop.
6 Likes
My hubby stepfather to my girls comes in every evening swoops them up at ages 10 and 11 . And holds them and loves them. They sit with him in his chair and watch movies and read . He does what a daddy does. If I ever told him he to stop or it was wrong. I would be out on my ass. Let him love those babies. You need to have so.e counseling and seek help.
If you were legitimately concerned and felt like he was being inappropriate with your child then WHY is he still around? Sounds to me like you are the one with the problem. I would never keep a man around if I even thought for a second he was being inappropriate around my children. 
15 Likes
My daughter and boyfriend cuddle all the time, he’s not the father to my 3 kids and loves them as his own. I don’t see anything out of the way with it, she needs that bonding parent time just like your other child…
4 Likes
I mean, if you don’t trust him with your girls…why are you sleeping with him and having children with him?
Unless he’s given you reason to feel like it’s inappropriate and if you do HAVE reason then why are you still with him? I don’t see he issue. Just my opinion 
I honestly think it’s pretty sad that you’re sexualizing it when it really shouldn’t be, sooo who is the real wrong one here 
14 Likes
No you are absolutely right
You’re basically calling him a pedophile for being a loving father figure to his daughters. Wow go you for belittling him so much 
9 Likes
If you don’t trust your husband with your kid then you should not be with him period , I could never IMAGINE TELLING NY HUSBAND NOT TO “love” or “ cuddle “ my baby like he does his own. Like for real ? If there is real concern there then the REAL QUESTION IS WHY ARE YOU STILL WITH HIM AND WHY ARE YOU LEAVING HIM ALONE WITH YOUR CHILD. And if there’s not then what kind of message are you sending your child ? Sorry I married Th is guy to be here for us as a family and to love us like his own but not you . Do you best how ridiculous that sounds ??
7 Likes
When you get jealous of your children, there is a problem. She’s 4. Let her cuddle with her dad!! My son is 5 and still likes to cuddle with me
4 Likes
What is wrong with you???
4 Likes
Cuddling children is a natural part of developing healthy parental relationships. It helps to develop & nurture bonds & a safe and trusting environment. Why are you worried about this child? Does he not cuddle with the other one? Does he not cuddle with you because you’re pregnant, hormonal, & uncomfortable? Is it a jealousy thing that stems from something in your past that needs to be dealt with? You can’t look at an adult showing some expression of love & affection and automatically let your brain go to the “sexual” agenda. Sounds like hormones & deeper issues to me.
I’m confused why they can’t cuddle the man they view as their father or is their father?? Kids like to cuddle, you want him to tell your children no, don’t sit with me mom doesn’t like it… so then they feel excluded?
1 Like
Maybe he loves your children?? I cuddle and snuggle with mine! So I don’t feel it should be any different with their dads! My fiance and my middle daughter who is biologically another man’s child(of course she loves her dad!) are so close! She kisses him and hugs and snuggles him! Kids need that! I would never question it because I trust him completely! He’s a great dad and step dad!!
1 Like
I’m a grown woman and my stepfather is a father to me. If I am sad or need comfort. I would hug him or sit close to him on a couch. Maybe even lay my head on his shoulder. It would never be anything inappropriate. Just a father loving and consoling his child.
You are absolutely wrong. He is being a step father and from the sounds of it, a good one to treat his non biological child like his own. If you have a reason to fear something might happen with him, then you shouldn’t be pregnant with a second child by him… he sounds like a good dad AND a good stepfather. My opinion though, and I am someone who’s been molested so I understand the potential fears of the world with your children. If your uncomfortable due to past issues, seek help. The whole world isn’t bad and your gonna cause an issue in their relationship. Unless you have a reason why he shouldn’t be cuddling your daughter, then he’s being a good stepdad. Does he not snuggle his daughter? Does he treat your daughter differently? If the answers are yes, then LEAVE otherwise don’t cause him to isolate your daughter when he is stepping up for a child who isn’t his.
4 Likes
If you wanted children but didnt want to allow a man to be a father why didn’t you adopt or use a sperm donor? Continuing to be with this man and get pregnant by him twice then treating him like a predator is abusive! That is emotional abuse! Sounds like you just wanted kids now you want an excuse to push the father out so you’ll reach for anything…
6 Likes
I’m a stepmom and honestly, cuddling my stepson (even now, when he’s 8yo) has become one of our biggest bonding moments. I’ve been in his life since he was 6mo, which I know probably makes a difference, but if he’s making a genuine effort, honestly cares about her, and has given you no true reason not to trust him, you’re out of line. That being said, if you have an actual reason not to trust him with her, you need to get all your kids and yourself out of that situation.
2 Likes
WAIT … so a man who is father to your children whether this be biological or not is not allowed to show affection to the children?
do you know how much this sounds like you are having thoughts very similar to a pedophile because you are choosing to view this as inappropriate.
He probably wasn’t even spooning her considering she is 4 and his much taller.
If you can’t have him cuddle your kids and show affection you need to end your relationship and get rid of men altogether.
Allow them to see their father without your eyes wondering and your mind thinking the wrong thing.
Call my comment harsh if you like. Say what you want but I stand by what I said.
Your mind is sickening.
6 Likes
That is a super weird question.
If you don’t trust the man you’re with to snuggle your children you shouldn’t be with that man. Period. (Or he shouldn’t be with YOU)… You’re making the poor guy feel like a pedophile to his own children! You’ve got a screw loose lady.
6 Likes
If you don’t trust him then why are you with him?
2 Likes
If you feel something wrong about it, trust yourself gut.
My almost 5 year old is my husbands SD. They cuddle and take naps together. Its a bonding mechanism. Their relationship is amazing.
Your nuts. He loves your kids
Like I’m offended by this post .
2 Likes
If you don’t trust him leave him.
1 Like
I have cuddled with my step son since he was 4 ! He is now 14 and will still lay his head on my shoulder or lap at times while watching tv. I take all the cuddles i can get from him now because when they’re teenagers you dont get it much.
2 Likes
Why would you be with someone and have children with some one who you don’t feel comfortable showing affection to the children? They are 4 and younger they need and want love. If you aren’t comfortable with your partner showing love to your children you probably should not be with him. 
2 Likes
She’s 4…I don’t really see a problem at that age, unless you’re seeing something odd that he’s doing besides just cuddling and giving warmth and affection to your 4 year old. Body contact is good for kids. It’s shown to help grow their brains and makes them feel safe. bonding. There must be some reason you don’t trust him?
They are 4 and 16 months and you want to make it something that it’s not. These posts get more fucking stupid each day.
There is nothing wrong for a father to cuddle his children, to hold them, to lay with them, to bath them. If you don’t trust him then you shouldn’t have had children with him. He has every right to get defencive. Your basically saying he is being I’m Sexual abusive and you don’t trust him… And if you do have a worry about it then you should not be with him or having more children to him. So if you had a son he wouldn’t be able to cuddle with you?.
2 Likes
I guess further info is needed. I dint see any issues with daddy’s snuggling cuddling or hugging your kids. You laid with him amd had babies with him. If you don’t trust him why would you have his children?
1 Like
My husband is step daddy to our 2 oldest and he treats them the same as his own kids and the includes cuddles. I see absolutely nothing wrong with a daddy cuddling with his daughter. I’m sorry u feel something is wrong with that. Maybe u need to think about why that bothers you and seek help
1 Like
Not to mention that this could potentially disrupt your daughters view of men later. If she looks at him like her dad and he treats her like it and you dont allow him to be that father figure she is gonna feel like SHE is the one who did something wrong and COULD have some adverse affects as she matures. I understand the fear but if you trust him enough to be married to him and live with him and have children with him I dont understand why you wouldnt allow your daughter to create a vital bond ? …
1 Like
Sounds like a YOU problem, if you don’t trust him… why is he around your kids?
4 Likes
I wouldn’t like it … Even if i trust him
Dude, you’re f’ing weird lol I’ll just say that first. Also, is this an f’ing joke?? Additionally, men are allowed to show emotion and cuddle their children, just like women do, so stop. Also, what you’re thinking about in your twisted is, quite frankly, repulsive and nasty. Finally, if you truly think he’s a bad guy that’s being a creep to your kids, why are you with him? Just a few things for YOU to think about…
9 Likes
My daughter lays with her daddy… maybe cause he’s a step parent I guess you can never be too safe but has he given you a reason to feel like that or maybe you have past trauma?? Trying not to make any harsh assumptions
I hope he leaves you finds another woman to have more kids with and cuddles with all his children (yours included) in her house where you are not around thinking nasty things and his new woman smiles takes pictures and enjoys the moment she is having🙃
5 Likes
Do u think of him as a stepdad or a predator? I mean by wouldn’t he, she’s his daughter(step or not). And she’s young, of course he is going to cuddle and love her. Should he only do this w his bio kids and not the step? Then she will feel pushed away. I think if you don’t trust him w your kids, u should prob go
2 Likes
Cuddling isn’t inherently sexual, it creates a bond and it’s nice to be held by someone who isn’t ur mother sometimes 
2 Likes
Trust your gut! ALWAYS
2 Likes
Also to everyone being super rude…you don’t know what this woman has been through.
Unfortunately my step dad was not a good man and used cuddling to be completely disgusting. You are allowed to be paranoid.
2 Likes
It sounds like theres some jealousy there seeing him cuddle his kids. You’re with him. You had a child. He took on that child. Hes not leaving that child out. I mean we cant see what hes doing. Only you can. You make a decision based on being a mom first. Dont ask anyone else
1 Like
Me and my stepson…does this also make you uncomfortable?
4 Likes
Wow. Youre taking away being a loving father to a child that’s not even his, and turning his affection into some weird inappropriate and even sexualized thing? That SCREAMS more about you and your disturbed mind than anything about him. Unless youve seen him do anything actually inappropriate, then he hasnt done anything wrong and the wrong one is you.
I can understand where your coming from, especially with the headlines these days. Be vigilant if it helps ease your fears but dont be outwardly cruel or inappropriate without actual reason cause youre going to destroy your marriage and take away a good father figure for your children if theres no basis.
4 Likes
My mother was always uncomfortable with physical affection from my step-dad (who I consider my father due to the fact that they were married when I was 3 months old). As a young teen, I remember a specific incident where he bear hugged me (just like he did with my half sister and brother) and my mom made a big deal of it. It made me feel self-conscious around my dad, uncomfortable with safe physical affection from males, and created a barrier between me and my dad. It affected our relationship and made me feel excluded from something that my brother and sister were receiving.
6 Likes
Look, something obviously happened to you or someone you love as a child and that’s why you have these reservations. I get it. But its wrong.
Thats your husband. You married him. You had more children with him. You let him claim the title of father to your oldest. If you had even an inkling of something funny going on, you shouldn’t have done any of these things and the fault lies with you for having such a feeling and continuing to stay with and reproduce with the man. If you do feel something is wrong, you need to get the hell outta dodge.
If you dont have any feelings of weird shit going on and you’re just projecting your own fears and insecurites on their father/daughter relationship, you need to stop. Its 100% normal and healthy for parents to cuddle and love on their children. You’re doing both your daughter and your husband a disservice by acting the way you do.
Get some counselling.
Was wondering why you feel it’s wrong for dad to cuddle child…
Was there something bad in your past???
Or has something happened to make you suspicious of his actions??? Perfectly normal for hugs and cuddles…find out in your own mind why you very this way…
1 Like
My kids step mom cuddles with my kids all the time. When they were younger and even now at 10 and 14. I can’t tell you how to feel, but this is a little off to me that you feel it’s a strange thing . Maybe the child asked him to cuddle … is he supposed to tell her no?
I can’t even believe I’m reading this why ain’t daddy’s supposed to cuddle their babies 
I think the twisted things your thinking in your own head are wrong and sick for that matter!
1 Like
If you even have a SLIGHT gut feeling the cuddling is inappropriate you need to stop them from seeing each other like yesterday. Cuddling with a kid isn’t sexual I wouldn’t worry unless you have a good reason to be worried. Then you need to separate them immediately. Just listen to your gut mama.
1 Like
I’ve had 5 stepsons. All I would treat no different than my bio kids. 4 ranged from 3-13 and my one now is 8. Cuddling is never an issue. I never initiated because I’ve had the biomom that saw things that weren’t there, but as a stepparent I offer comfort and security to my sons. If they need to cuddle, cool. Hugs and loves for all. On the other hand, these kids grew up with me. I changed diapers, I did baths when bios weren’t able. I never once thought of it as improper. I saw it as care the child needs. Same as a hug or cuddles.
If you’re afraid something is going to happen but have no evidence, seek help for yourself. Making accusations or seeing ghosts is going to harm your relationship with your daughter and husband and it will harm their relationship as she grows too. If you have seen evidence that he is touching her where he shouldn’t be, then it’s always kids before spouses.
2 Likes
More information is definitely needed, why does it make you uncomfortable? Why do you think it’s not okay? If you view him as a predator and think he’s being perverted by cuddling his daughter then you definitely shouldn’t be with him. My husband and son snuggle together all the time and there is absolutely nothing remotely sexual about it.
2 Likes
The fact your asking this about means you know something isn’t right in your gut. And yet you’ve birthed 2 of his children which he WILL cuddle like that. I cuddle my son like that and I’m not a pedo, but hunny. Why tf did you have his kids if your going to make him feel like a rapist.
7 Likes
My boyfriend cuddles with my 9 and 3 year old daughters. I cuddle with his 2 year old son. We completely trust each other so it’s not an issue. She’s 4 not 14. I personally am on his side. Does your daughter feel uncomfortable with it? If she does then I can understand. If not I would ease up. She’s going to see him cuddling your younger two and not her and she’s going to feel like he loves her less. Just my take on the situation.
3 Likes
He can’t cuddle his girls? I mean unless you have a serious legitimate reason then you are crazy for saying that and are trying to make him look like a creep! That’s probably how he feels now. I hope you don’t have another daughter that the father is not allowed to snuggle with!
3 Likes
Stop saying she’s being ridiculous no she’s worrying. And I believe she has been thru some things too.
Over reacting. My SO cuddles our 4 year old all the time. Would it be different to you if he was her Bio dad? If so he is her step dad and acting in as her parent in every way.
1 Like
If you dont trust your fiance with your child then sorry but you shouldn’t be with him. I couldn’t even begin to imagine telling him he isn’t allowed to show affection towards his daughter, clearly there are bigger issues with YOU. Would you stop her biological dad from doing the same ? Probably not how is it any different clearly he feels as though that child is his. Do you think its right to deprive that affection from your daughter? Kids love cuddles with there daddy’s and will probably start questioning why daddy doesn’t kiss her or cuddle her. Get over yourself or get out of the relationship your in simple as that. Your so petty lol
8 Likes
If you feel it’s inappropriate you shouldn’t be with him. My daughter cuddled with my ex (not her dad) from age 2 to 5. He loved her like his own.
4 Likes
My stephfather later took advantage of me, was very “lovey” with me when my mom wasnt home. I wish my mom told him not to do certain things
1 Like
Nothing wrong with dads cuddles…
Feom the little info here it sounds like you have issues that you need to be address with a dr! 
Makes me think maybe something happened to you when you were little!
9 Likes
those who are saying you dont know the full story… sorry if he was any type of predator should she not be worried about ALL her children not just the one who’s not his. & surely to god she would leave if she had such disgusting suspicions not have 2 kids by him.
5 Likes
Unless you view every father figure as creepy for cuddling their babies, it almost seems as if you have some unresolved trauma to deal with. Or perhaps in this specific scenario, something else is going on behind the scenes to tip you off that something else is going on. If your gut feeling says something wrong is happening, talk to your children and ask them and see if they give any weird responses.
6 Likes
What’s wrong with cuddling? The fact that you’re having issues with this, to me seems like you don’t trust him. Which is odd considering you’re pregnant with his second child. Have a little trust and don’t look for things that aren’t there unless there’s reason to think otherwise
5 Likes
why you with a man you feel this way about is the bigger question?
3 Likes
Cuddling is how it started with my stepdad. Then he began “petting” me… at the age of 9
If u have a bad feeling about it then you need to get your girls away from him otherwise your to blame when something more happens
1 Like
I have two daughters who absolutely love cuddling with their daddy and theres absolutely nothing wrong with it if you even think for one second its wrong you shouldnt be with him and you shouldnt of had kids with him
5 Likes
If you don’t trust him to cuddle your 4 year old, you shouldn’t be allowing him to stay home alone with either of them.
11 Likes
Yes you are wrong. Unless you have some serious facts to support any claims that you seem to be hinting to then just stop. If something happened to you when you were younger then I would get help for YOU and not project it on your family.
6 Likes
If you are uncomfortable with him with your daughter why do you stay. Something is bothering you. Either your not saying something. Or it is in your past that this is making you uncomfortable.
9 Likes
You’re sexualizing something that doesnt need to be sexualized grow up! Has this man done something wrong to make you think its inappropriate? Probably not since you’re pregnant and engaged. HES THEIR DAD my kids love snuggling with their dad.
8 Likes
Hey mama I understand where you fear is coming from, trust your gut but I think it’s also in the best interest for everyone to get family therapy so if there is something unresolved in your past you can work on it and their talk to your girls and make sure they are okay too it can bring some peace of mind
1 Like
Um I’m sorry, but if you dont feel comfortable with your FIANCE cuddling your daughter then maybe you need to check yourself and leave the environment before something happens to your kids.
6 Likes