Ever thought of doing it together? Or sign her another task make it to be important. Option the overrules us tell her the truth you want to do it.
I think the mother in law was just offering to do something nice and special for the mum to be … It’s not like she offering to do the catering and she’s a bad cook…
Honestly it’s a thoughtful gesture appreciate what you do have… (some in laws can be narcissistic )
It’s not that deep:stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:
You will be in full control of all Birthday parties to come.
Xx
Nah sis, it’s you that is pushing that baby outta your hole. You make the decisions. Inputs are appreciated but the final decision should be yours
pull up your big girl panties and let your future mother in law decorate.
Who is throwing the party? Her or are you throwing yourself a party?
no thanks is not an ugly word… but my best friends have it all under control, get with them ask if anything they need.
you shouldn’t be in control of your own shower. that to be given by someone else so back off
Tell her that you want to decorate but she can help set up
You better get ready cause if you want to do this with baby shower I feel sorry for you
A baby shower is a party given to the parents to be. Your part is to show up and be grateful.
a shower is something OTHERS do FOR YOU…not what YOU do
Say there’s someone already doing it and get her another job so she feels included still
Let her … you can decorate the baby’s room
I would just say decorations are covered and give her a task you feel more comfortable with her handling. Keep her included tho
Just say thank but you would like to do it the way you want but she can help you if she likes
Your just supposed to go to your baby shower and enjoy it.
My mom / I / friend already bought them but I’d love your help with them on the day
You are supposed to sit back and enjoy. Let her have her fun and contribute in her way for her new grandchild. Let go and love
Straight forward. People appreciate that. Just tell her that you would like to do decorations… Simple as that. I’m sure she wouldn’t be upset
Have two! One for family and one for friends
The baby shower is for you and your baby. Sit back do nothing and enjoy it.
My kids are 20 and 11 and I can barely remember the decorations
My 1st thought…is the bf a mommas’ boy? CRINGE
Be kind just tell her and be grateful that she has offered
Yeah just tell her that you really would be greatful if she could… Whatever you don’t mind her doing. If she thinks that she be really helping if she does that other job. She should be happy. Problem solved
Tell her you have already organised the decorations but she can help you set them up with you. Or you already have the decorations but can you help me organise bla bla bla
Tell her you have a theme and she has to work with that.
Let her do it. A great chance to build a lasting relationship. Hurt feelings now will never heal!!!
The best thing to do is be honest in how you feel
Advice…get married before you have a baby…
Mil’s can be a blessing, and look at your hubby-isnt he wonderful! Who raised him. Give her a chance to be involved
She’s gonna be I your life for the rest of your life so your gonna have to learn to get on
I assume you are not paying for it, so sit back, enjoy and be grateful
A baby shower is a party thrown for you and the upcoming baby by someone else. It’s not supposed to be planned or executed by you. Let her have this. It will go a long way in building a relationship with her. Seriously, there are so many things you have to worry about. There’s a saying you should get really comfy with in all of your relationships: choose your battles. If you fight everything you’re only going to make yourself and everyone around you miserable 24/7.
Your lucky you got one. Nobody asked me if I wanted one.
You are doing your own baby shower?
Id tell her it fine but u want the decor u want.
Be nice about it but speak your mind now. If not you will have a miserable life.
You should be doing it never heard of the mother to be doing it
Tell her you already asked the godmother to do it.
Put your big girl undies on and tell her,
Plan 2 parties moms always do what they wanna do
Just be honest. Say you would like to be in charge of decorations.
It’s a damn shower, choose your battles wisely.
So tell her exactilly what you just posted…its your baby shower
Do it together. It would be fun that way.
Mama to be it’s suppose to be a surprise
Tell her you want to make all the decisions together so you can bond
my answer would be, NO THANKS, IT IS SOMETHING I WANT TO DO MYSELF.
“No, thank you but that’s already covered. Maybe you can help in (blank) area… lmk.”
LET HER DO IT! So what ! get on her good side and trust me if you plan on a life with her son it will be a good one … respect her ! she did offer to help …make her a small part of every event concerning the baby … She will respect your space and really like you for that
Absolutely not my Lassies decorators it her way. I contributed to it via Money for Balloons & DJ as did everyone . Tho everything was Her Choice her Hubby took absolutely nothing to do with it. Do it your Way & if anyone wants to help ££ wise then that’s even better Good Luck
Why not just let her do it, you never know you may like it
It’s more rude to give yourself a showrr.
One day, you will realize, it really doesn’t matter. It’s hard being the
Mother of the guy. A daughter is a daughter all her life, a son is a son, till he takes a wife. Include her. You’ll be happy you did.
be grateful you even are having a shower and people want to help
Tell her to butt out simples…!!
Tell her what you want.
You’re about to give birth to her grandchild. She just wants to be involved. It’s an opportunity for you to become closer…and I suggest that you recognize that is far more important than balloons and streamers.
Don’t be a Mozilla.
A baby shower is something that someone else throws FOR you…you don’t have to micro-manage everything. You have a baby room to decorate and many. many years of decisions that will fall on your shoulders.
My Mom and I have never gotten along well and SHE threw MY first baby shower. lol She was in the delivery room, as well.
That relationship is VERY important, she’s going to have an important role in raising that child, too.
If you push her away and cause your relationship with her to be negative then that will cause conflict and problems in your OWN relationship…which will inevitably affect your child.
That’s your baby daddy’s MOM…your baby’s GRANDMA. It’s not JUST about YOU. If HE is important to you then you should respect that.
I can’t stand my bf’s Mom…but I STILL show her respect and tolerate her when I have to because HE is important to me.
But you’re worried about balloons?
If you talk to her nicely and let her know what you are thinking of for it, it can be a GOOD experience for BOTH of you. It doesn’t need to be perfect.
Enjoy the freedom and being the center of attention now…‘Cuz once that baby arrives that’s all over. lol. You won’t even have a name anymore, you’ll just be …’s Mom.
How about just tell her. OR SHE WILL RULE THE REST OF YOUR LIFE.
Afraid of your MIL already. You should have jumped in thank you but I already bought the decorations as I would love to decorate the shower for my baby.
Politely ask her to be in charge of not helping.
No, no, no, no, your baby, your party
The baby shower is for you and baby in your honor… not for you to be in charge of…enjoy what others do for you and be in peace…
I don’t understand why you always have to treat your mother-in-law like this, maybe you’re not close because you don’t want it, you can say ok let’s talk about it, let’s do it together
Its not a big deal get on her good side your gonna need a babysitter pick your battles
Unless it is you throwing the baby shower I will keep my mouth shut typically the person throw in the shower is in charge of doing whatever he or she wants.
Is it a thing now to throw a shower for yourself?
LET HER DO IT Don’t start out on the wrong foot as they say. I am warning you to let her do it and do not say one word bad.
Let me reword your opening line.
My boyfriend’s mom has graciously offered to plan and host OUR baby shower, even tho deep down I’m sure she wishes she was doing it for her son and his WIFE. What can I do to show her how much I appreciate this offer and how she’s been so accepting of our situation.
Youre an immature, spoiled brat…grow up.
A baby shower isn’t planned by you. It’s thrown for you. Gotta get that “I control everything” outta your head.
You should be happy she wants to do this for you. Decorations aren’t nearly as important as a future relationship with your baby’s grandmother. Just relax and enjoy the day. Having your way isn’t as important as having a loving caring family for future of your child.
Just be appreciative! Say thank you and mean it.
I would just tell her I am doing the decorations but thank you for the offer.
Tell her you appreciate but already have it planned out. Ask if she wants to do something else. It’s YOUR shower for YOUR baby
I wish I had a mother in law. I never got to meet her.
Tell her thanks but no thanks i’d like to do it myself so thats whats happening
Maybe she’ll surprise you.
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. I don't want my boyfriend's mom being in charge of my baby shower decorations: Advice?
Who is responsible fot the shower? Most people do not give themselves a shower. Let them handle it. Remember it is only a moment in time. It is 1/4 her moment too.
no she isn’t in charge of anything. especially if you aren’t close. tell her to kick rocks. she had her kids it’s your time now.
Absolutely not. Despite her being excited its still about you ultimately. Let her help with what you want her to help with
I’m not sure how this popped up on my page but I’ll reply anyway. If I were in the situation and my mother was doing this to my wife I would let her know that it’s my wife’s decision. She’s having the child. She’s calling the shots. This whole “his mother has to be involved” mindset is over.
I wouldn’t feel the need to be in control of the baby shower decorations.its usually family or friends throwing it for you and the baby out of love, why not let them Express it their way?.. you’re gonna have the baby’s birthdays to control soon enough.
Honestly… usually it’s the mother in law or bestie that throws the baby shower.
Is it really that important? I mean pick your battles… is it her first grandbaby? She just may be super excited and want to be a part of things. You can tell her your thoughts etc… but you are supposed to relax and let others plan your party… just my 2 cents.
You pick the decorations and maybe let her help arrange them? I would be bothered by someone else picking a theme for me. But the way my family has always done it, is the parents or mom picks the theme but the party host sets it all up. I know you aren’t close to her, but you are carrying her grandchild which I’m sure she will love with all her heart and showing a little grace by letting her help decorate could go a long ways in bonding with her. Idk if that helps or not, but I hope you get all you want/need at the baby shower
Id tell her thanks, and I’d ask her if she didn’t mind you giving your input, such as color, theme, type of cake etc. I’d be grateful that she wants to be a part of your lives!
Tell her you already have a theme you have your heart set on but if she would like the help in another area that would be great
Sounds like you both are strong willed and each wants it there way. Sons pick women like their mothers so not criticing just stating facts as uncomfortable as it sometimes can be.
Let her do it. What harm is it,seriously? Why would you even decorate yourself? What happened to the days that a baby shower was a surprise?
Give her another task like food ,cake,drinks,invites ect. and tell her you’ve already bought the decorations and if she wants to help put them up , be at your house at _____ to help.
You don’t have to control everything, let someone else do it, and enjoy the day work free…just a thought
She sounds like a controller watch out need to start asserting yourself early if she’s going to be in your life give her one thing she’s in charge of that you don’t really care about that might help the situation try not to be aggressive or rude but stand your ground its your day. Good luck
Maybe just tell her you want to be completely involved with it as well and maybe it’s her way of trying to get closer to you.
Its YOUR party, your decision, not hers. Tell you have organised the deorations already, but she can help you decorate (if you want that) give her a job to do. But dont let her tell you what she wants to do.
It starts with decorating, but if you dont take a firm stand, it will her telling you how to parent next.
First you should have planned a wedding shower then a baby shower.
You can’t have a lasting relationship with her son if you don’t let her be envolved also. It will hurt his feelings after awhile.
“I already have a theme picked out. Would you like to plan the food instead?” I mean, she’s trying. Don’t shoot her down too hard.
Do not be afraid to set healthy and respectful boundaries now. You will be setting the tone for future events like birthdays, holidays, school events, etc. it’s important that she knows her input and help is valued and appreciated, but that in issues regarding your child you are the mother and have final say. Definitely tell her “I have a plan for how I’d like my decorations to look, but I’d love your help setting up/picking music/picking snacks and drinks”. And even if her feelings are hurt, stick to your guns while still being kind about it.
I know nothing about her and can only draw from my own experiences with mother in laws- everything should be just fine but if she does make a stink, rather than argue with her and create a grudge that will last have your boyfriend handle it. His mom, that means his job to make sure she understands that you are number one and she needs to be respectful towards you.
Congrats on the baby and enjoy your shower!
Tell her you have the decorations covered … but you appreciate the offer.