What concerns me most is that you sound like you don’t feel safe to accept a meal together without misleading him. Eating a meal together isn’t weird in general because you ARE a family. I’ve seen ex’s who raise children together and one or both get remarried and live in the same home. There is no right or wrong as long as everyone feels safe and loved. Bottomline, listen to your gut.
If it were me and I was in a serious relationship with someone else, then I’d invite him to come to dinner as well. I’d pay for us two and see what dad did. If he stoped inviting me once I brought my current person, then I’d know what he was attempting to do.
Whatever you do shake off the guilt!! Seeing his parents speaking and eating together is a kind human interaction. That’s a good thing!
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If you’re uncomfortable doing it right now , that’s okay , just explain that to him .
Also , my girls’ dad and I also had a pretty rocky & toxic relationship , but get along much better now as well . For the first year of us being apart , we didn’t do things together with the kids . It’s been 4 years now though , and we go out to dinner with the kids , as well as have family outings quite often . My kiddos aren’t confused by it - we’ve talked about how mom & dad are just better as friends but that we both love them and want them to be happy and that regardless we are all still family . Even my current bf (been together 3 years) participates , and honestly once we all started doing that , I could sense my girls relief and happiness . It really does good for them , I feel like it creates less of a “split household” type of atmosphere for them .
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Have a conversation with your ex away from your son. Explain to him how you want him to have his time with his son, and that you and he are not together. Thank him for being thoughtful, but you don’t want to confuse your son into thinking that you two are a couple again, and your current relationship is what he needs to understand. It’s ok to not want to go. That’s supposed to be his time with his dad.
If you feel uncomfortable about going…don’t do it. Don’t force yourself. Don’t give your child false hope. Make the most of your time when your child is with you and end it. Have your own outings with your kid. There’s no need to feel any sort of guilt.
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I spend time with my ex and our daughter. We have been split up for 13 years now, but we’ve always done it.
She knows we’re just friends and nothing outside of being friends has happened.
We’re very clear with eachother, whoever we’re in romantic relationships with, and our daughter and it works for us.
Figure out what works for you do you don’t feel guilty or like you’re missing anything.
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dont go. those days are specifically for his dad to spend time with him. let him and his father know that you appreciate the offer however you want that time to be for the two of them to bond. its their time together and you dont want to take any time away from that… do not feel guilty for saying no. in the end its vetter for the two of them.
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I may be in the minority here but… my ex husband was controlling and abusive. That being said when our girls request for us both to do something together with them, I go. He has no control over me any more and my kids happiness comes before my fear. I will only go out in public places because I feel more safe that way but I will not let my girls down. If they want us both at something, holiday, party, dinner ect. I make it a priority. You have to do what is best for you and your son but think about it as spending time making your son happy not your ex.
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I can see in the case of a birthday or a school function. My brother and his ex did this. My nephew felt they would get back together. This never happened plus my nephew was a little terror to any future girl or guy that got involved with either. Don’t do this. Save yourself a lot of grief
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There is no clear book or rules on co-parenting. Use your knowledge of your relationships and everyone involved to make the best decision for you and your family. No one family is alike, no one father is alike, no one mother is alike, and no one child is a like. My ex and I did “strange” when we separated then divorced back in the day. Our two children are all grown and in their own. They both thanked us as adults for making them our number one priority, making good conscious decisions when it came to them growing up. We both had relationships but kept all words kind in every situation. Just do what is right for you and your family. Adjust when needed.
Set boundaries. Your child will appreciate a solid co-parenting example when he is older. It may raise questions as he grows, but nothing that can’t be answered. You don’t have to go every time. But its thoughtful that he does invite you
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Don’t go. Kindly tell him you appreciate the inclusion and would love more time with your son but that they need father and son bonding time as well. You must put down that boundary. I wasn’t always vocal about it and now that mine is 16 my ex talks to me more than my child and is more focused on getting back with me after 7 years. Stop it now and don’t feel guilty about letting your child have undivided attention with the other parent.
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I agree with Kasie Robinson but I want to add, you should have this conversation soon before you get put into the same situation. Have it with him when you son is not around so if it goes south he doesnt have to witness it. Sometimes people will ask you to make plans in front of your child so they can manipulate you. Dont fall for itn
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He is inviting you because it is easier for him when you are there than having complete parental responsibility. You are the free babysitter. Nothing complicated about it. Don’t go.
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DO NOT FEEL GUILTY!! That time is Dad time. He needs to do it on his own.
Been 4 years since I have been divorced. We get along so much better as friends. We talk a lot but we never get together with our daughter. It would give her hope.
Go with your gut feeling.
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I’m not sure why you’re really asking this question…I only made it halfway through because you seem to have answered it already…you don’t want to continue spending time with the two of them, you’re not comfortable with it…so don’t. Just tell the father you can’t make it or tell him you don’t feel comfortable hanging out with him like that. Some parents are able to co parent like that, some aren’t. I could never co parent like that with my daughter’s father. You have to do what’s best for you and your son and it sounds like what is best is that you don’t hang out with the father at all.
Good luck!
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I would 100% go. It’s not a date… it’s showing your son that you can have a healthy relationship with his father and making memories for him with two happy healthy parents.
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Him asking you to a dinner date is 1. Inappropriate 2. Another way to manipulate/control you 3. Rude/inconsiderate to your current relationship
If your child has a sporting event ect that would be one thing but its not.
This is his time with your child. He should be spending it all with him and focusing on him not you. This not only, as you said, confuses your child but isn’t fair to your child that his father n is now giving you attention when he should be getting it.
edited to add
I would say getting along at outings can be ok but ALL parties including your boyfriend should be there. This will show your child its ok you 2 didnt work because you both love him and can get along civilly as adults. This sets the tone for if your child is ever in the same situation.
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Ask your SO to join you. My kids dad, his wife, our kids, my SO and I all go out to dinner as a group once in a while. Maybe if your SO goes you wont feel so uncomftorable.
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You have a child together so you will always be family, like it or not. I say love your child the best you can and if you are not your best around his Dad then don’t go. If you can be your best even around him then I encourage you to go. Young children especially thrive to see Mom and Dad and baby all together. Just my 2 cents.
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You can still go on outings, as long as you have clear, well established boundaries within YOURSELF, and also with your ex.
If there’s truly nothing there between you, there’s no need for guilt of any kind, whatsoever.
It’s good, as long as you both have and respect each other’s boundaries.
It’s healthy for the child to see a civil, respectful relationship between the parents, regardless of the nature of that relationship.
My two cents!
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I would occasionally go-maybe once a month or so. It’s nice for kids to see their parents get along and it makes them feel happy that they can have a meal with both parents.
I hate my ex, but we are civil. While uncomfortable, we occasionally we will go out to dinner with our daughter. She actually recently asked if we could do it again soon because she enjoyed being able to be with both of us together. She knows there’s no chance of us getting back together. I think as long as that’s clear to your child, what’s the harm in making your child happy!
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If you feel that you and your ex can be friends and give your child memories of the two of you getting along even if you aren’t together, I don’t think you should feel guilty. I say this because I envy my best friend and her relationship with her ex husband. They are ex’s but remain the best of friends, they hang out, go out, live close to each other…they even did the roommate thing for awhile…but there was no romantic involvement what so ever. She is now remarried and her ex will babysit her younger kids and keep the family dog when they go on vacation etc…I’m astounded by how they managed such an amazing friendship after their divorce. She says it wasn’t always like that, and for the 1st few years he did want to try again…but she ignored his attempts while staying amicable. I look at those two with complete admiration now and wish we could all have that.
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If this did not happen when you were together then no need to start a new family tradition
You share custody do you invite him when you take your son somewhere ?
He needs to learn to get along on his own and with his own family without you there
if you are comfortable for certain large functions then that is your choice
Don’t be guilty or feel bad about your choices and if you feel uncomfortable then listen to you 
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Be friendly with ex, but out it respect for your new relationship, keep your distance
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Hes manipulating your son. It irks you because of that. Its to show him in the future he couldnt have been that terrible while muti tasking to observe you and irritate your mate. Watch your step.
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Let your ex know that you don’t want your son confused by spending “family time” together unless it is a special occasion such as his 5th birthday or a school event. I had the following talk to my youngest grandson when he asked me if Mommy and Daddy were getting back together, “Grandson, Mommy and Daddy aren’t going to get back together. They along better because they aren’t in the same house. They are great parents that they are able to get along so that it is better for the two of you.”
Me and my daughter dad use to take her to the zoo… where I take pictures of them 2 and have him take pitches of me and her, we also went shopping together for her clothes, which their was times I also take my son…we have gotten along so much better this way… I would just let the dad know crystal clear that you dont want him…
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Say no, and dont go! I have the same and I do not go along on outings for all the reasons you mentioned above. Just harder to keep every thing seperated. My ex and I have a great friendship and we co parent very well but when it comes to the time kids are with their dad I feel its their time and I dont feel comfortable giving them a false sense of family together. My ex also hasnt moved on enough yet emotionally.
Don’t go it’s just that simple , his time with your son should be about them . If it’s a birthday or school function fine . If you have a significant other in your life then it’s time to enjoy him when the child is with his dad .
You have answered your own feelings. If you are uncomfortable, that matters. Do not put yourself in any situation that makes you feel uncomfortable. You wont be able to fully move on and he knows that. That is why he is probably asking.
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depending on how you get on its totally up to you whats normal, my brothers father came and spent that much time at our house i called him daddy joe, it never gave my brother false hope, when my parents finally would do things together my younger one didnt get false hope its about been clear about it all mummy and daddy are friends children can understand that they are very smart but if you dont want to then simply dont but as a child parents only doing things on special occasions is crap you want them both to do certain things and your made to feel like you have to pick 1 parent over the other for the rest of the year
Going out as a family is important and incorporating your new SO’s is also important. It’s good for your son to see that you guys will always be there for him… but also that your SO’s can also get along and be there for him.
It’s hard and it takes work. But I truly believe it’s super important. That way the child isn’t worried about who to invite to what events, will his parents get along, etc, that is the kind of stress that children don’t need.
If you can be civil and do “family” things together, then yes I think you should. As long as you keep it limited for your relationship with the father. Healthy is the goal.
Follow your heart! You need to let it be known that the time you are all together is only school events , b-days, you say you are in a relationship now? Wouldn’t you feel that there is something else going one if you where in your boyfriend’s shoes that is also somthing to like about your child needs to also know that mommy has to live her life all so. I have two children of my own i raised my self it was hard they learn as you teach and explain within reason of the childs age. You are a wonderful mom NEVER let anyone say otherwise you are a mom that will do anything, everything you can for your child God Bless stay strong
My husband would never be ok to dine with his ex or even attend a party. Mind u… each experience is different. And it’s ok to say no. His ex LIVES to drive us apart…and it’s sad for the kid. She even told lawyers during court hearings that my husband still tries to “be with her” even though I was always there during “drop offs”
It’s all what your comfortable with. There is no right or wrong answer on how to do this. Do what you feel. My opinion is that I would only attend if it’s a special occasion. A birthday, mothers day or some celebration. Showing your child that mom and dad can get along is amazing! Yet, I can see where the little one can start to get confused.
Trust your gut and don’t feel guilty for something you cannot control feeling. You sound like a wonderful mom who loves her son, but it is okay for him to spend quality alone time with his dad too. So only go to family type appropriate events you prefer like your son’s birthday, and tell your ex that while you do appreciate the other offers, that is for just them to bond instead. All healthy relationships encourage some alone time, so use that time for you and whatever you need to be a better you.
Well if it was a controlling abusive relationship you should keep your distance in that sense. But if it was just arguing while together and nothing abusive. Then you should show your son that even if you arent together you still can be a family. And I’m saying this while I am on a camping trip with my husband our daughter and my ex and his wife her kids and my son and our two together. Bc we work to make it work for the kids. Changing what people think should he normal and being a blender family. Bc our kids come first. This isn t possible for everyone. But my ex and I see each other as family bc of our kids and they were priority day one. 🤷 It isnt always easy bc we sometimes have disagreement but we respect each other. I’m proud of where we are
Its not an attempt to rekindle your relationship with your ex, they refer to it as “Coparenting” and as your son gets a older and more inquisitive, you can explain to him, Just because the 2 of you arent together doesn’t mean that you can’t be friends and do things together with your son, and in turn, if for some reason your son has the same situation (hopefully he doesn’t), but if he should, then you guys will have done your part and taught him how to handle it responsibly. My exwife and i haven’t been together for several years, but we still do things for each other because we are friends above all else and those actions instilled in our daughter just how much we love her.
I think that special occasion is good. Anything to do with school etc. my ex and I were oil and water but when it came to our son, we put aside our differences. Every one was shocked we could come together like that. I would feel uncomfortable to go on outings. Let your son have his time with dad as long as you feel he’s safe. I hope it all works out.
You are still a family though, even if it’s your ex you share a child and that child deserves some family time, if it turn volatile stop, but some people are just toxic together and do fine as friends afterward. I think your kid is smart enough not to read too much into if you’re just spending a few hours here and there.
I know this may sound easier said than done, but instead of feeling like you’re turning down time with your son, remind yourself that it’s just more time your son gets to spend with his dad one on one.
I think your son seeing you guys interact civilly during any outing is positive for him. If you guys argued or the conversation was less than friendly than obviously this wouldn’t be a good idea. But if you can all three spend time together pleasantly then i think you should do it. Perhaps the more often you do it then it won’t feel so awkward for you.
I think sometimes it’s good so your son can see that you can both be there for him for important and special things. Beyond that do himand your current s.o. get along?if so see if you can all do something together
I think you could handle it with him not even knowing, believe in the process. You hold all the cards in this scenario.
No need to voice, causing drama. When he ask, simply thank him, let him know whatever it is sounds fun. Wish them a great time, and don’t be available. Have a pedi or mani appointment… Have a whatever makes you unavailable.
They go on to a good day, and so do you.
I disagree that it is heathly. Not for your bf, not your son. YOU! YOU COME FIRST AND THAT’S OK.
Civil. No conflict. Boundiars
I can tell you’re a great mom, just because of the level of guilt that you are feeling. You poor thing. Always go with your gut. If you feel like you’re going to send the wrong message to Dad, then stop it right now. You can have separate things and you should never feel guilty for that. It’s always great if you can coparent, be you have to go with your gut. If you’re not comfortable, your baby is going to is going to feel it
Are the visits contingent on the father being present? Cuz he isnt necessary for you to have a relationship with your son. The boy is old enough to understand, you two can bond without the ex
I think you need to make it clear to your ex that you’re uncomfortable with his offers and you would rather him not ask. Sure birthday’s, and holidays, like cmas and Thanksgiving it should be a family thing but he needs to understand that you have moved on and your partner will be involved. If he hasn’t moved on he needs to.
Ask your child if he wants that time to be just him and his father’s time or if he likes you being there. If he likes you being there, pick a certain family day and only that day is for you to be involved in that time he’s with his father. I do this with mine.
Hmm…this is a hard one…I say that outings are fine: trips, activities like bowling or golf…nothing intimate like dinner. It’s good for your son to see a healthy relationship and you both being good parents. I do think if you feel its inappropriate or too intimate…then you need to set boundaries. I know plenty of parents who even do holidays together, vacation together and do family outings…I say have a talk with him and be clear/firm.
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Maybe he doesn’t know how to talk or interact well with your son and he invites you as the buffer and conversation starter. I would just tell him you aren’t coming anymore because you really need to take advantage of the time you don’t have your son to get stuff done and you need a break for me time. Cuz honestly you wouldn’t be lying. You do need “me”time and you can get lots done with out your son around.
it is good for your son to see you two getting along. kids of divorced parents can be very tense when both parents are in the same room.
Has anyone ekse noticed that these so-called fan questions are all written by the same person? I think it’s all phoney. And then we go and with ozr hearrs bleeding for that person we write essays full of empathy and goid advice (well, some). I’m going to invest my precious time in real stuff. Over and out!
Ex is an ex…now if he the father he should bond with them.if its a “special occasion” birthday, graduation, baptism, first car, first apartment, prom . going to college. There is a separateness you realize and respect.
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Maybe see if your new significant other is welcome to go along too that way your son sees a blended family
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I saw a lovely picture of Giada (the chef lady ) at Disney with the ex and their daughter…it was cute…hey, your son will always be your son, but he will be little for a little time. Go. Please…just be sure to say “were just friends”…and make it light and breezy.
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My ex and I have a 9 year old together and have not been together for 5 or 6 years. We get along really well and go out quite often as the three of us, or with my other two kids as well. It honestly does not confuse our child because we talk to him about it (many times) and we’ve had those conversations with each other… I’ll say that this has been way better for our son than doing everything separate (which we used to do), and he’s a lot happier than my other two kids, who’s father and I don’t even speak… if there’s something deeper making you feel uncomfortable you shoukd address that, but just having those conversations will probably help all involved.
Would you be more comfortable if he was in a new relationship too? Or if you brought your new guy?
There isn’t anything wrong with being friends and doing things together if you are both comfortable with that- if not, then you need to stop going to those outings . . .
Your new bf should be able to go with. If his intentions are good it wouldn’t be a problem. Good way to find out real quick what he’s up to.
I think open and honest communication with all parties will benefit you, here. Like making sure your ex knows you’re here for the kid, not for him. Making sure the kid knows this doesn’t mean anything romantic. Also, when you said “I don’t want to masquerade as a family with him,” I think I understand what you mean, but he is still a part of your sons family, so visa vi a part of yours. I think it’s important for your son to see you coparenting in a healthy way and getting along with each other. With that being said though, I don’t think you should put yourself in a situation that you aren’t comfortable with. Maybe try it, but put limits to it. If you feel like it’s happening too often, it’s okay to say no. But I don’t think occasionally joining your ex for time with your son is unhealthy. I think it can be very healthy if all parties are on the same page about what’s happening.
It sounds like every time he has his son he wants you with him say NO let him figure out how to be a dad without you there to support him. You have another relationship try telling him ok my boyfriend and i would love to go to dinner with you let your son see its ok to move forward with someone else but still be pleasant with his dad
So I’m going to start of by saying I didn’t read the whole post (due to a small timeframe) and my daughter and ex husband and I go out and do things because we feel that she needs to see that we can still be friends even though we are not compatible as partners.
It’s important that everyone feel comfortable. I used to try and join in because I wanted kiddo to see he has 2 parents who could get along - but it always ended up with him focusing on me and asking for something, ranging from money to ‘trying again’ until he found some new girl to catch in his web, then he’d stop talking to us all together until that didn’t work out. He now doesnt contact us at all. Sometimes I wonder if it’s because I told him I wasn’t interested in discussing anything unless it directly involved Kiddo, and he quickly found someone who fell for his BS and married him (who now tries to play buddy even though his father never talks to him…it’s weird as hell). But if that’s not the case I’d just tell your ex exactly what you wrote here and set those boundaries. If he has a history of being manipulative or abusive I wouldn’t feel guilty, Is just make it a hard no.
I will answer this question from the Viewpoint of someone whose daughter is now 38 years old. In my opinion, from my personal experience and from watching my friends in the similar situation, I think it is very unhealthy, except for special occasions where it’s an actual party with a lot of people, to continue to go out together as a family when you really aren’t. It is very confusing to the child.
I was always civil and kind to my ex-wife, but my daughter grew up knowing that her and I were not a couple. Also that there was no chance that we were ever going to get back together again. Whereas I watch my sister-in-law even at 63 years old cannot face the fact that her parents will never get back together, although they have been divorced for all her adult life since she was 13 years old
You are not confusing your son. You are setting a great example of love and respect and showing him family is still family.
I think your son needs to see that you and your ex can get along for him. I say go sometimes maybe not every time… your common ground is your son. Tell your ex that you are not interested in anything other than what’s beneficial for your son. I always invited my ex and his new wife to all the functions for my boys. Or if he was around where we live, we would all go out to eat or to the park or something. Or if I was driving through with my sons where he lived, we would all meet up somewhere. I also invited my new husbands ex and her new husband to holidays and functions for his kids. (he had custody) this went on until all of our kids (6 total) were of age… (unfortunately, my ex passed before my kids were of age) I get the volatile relationship too. I left because my ex hit one of our kids…(one thing to hit me, but not my kid) your feelings will be rocky about it all but you keep the best interest of your son at heart and it will work itself out. It took me a long time to allow my sons to go with their father by themselves because of past history. Within a yr of me allowing my sons to be alone with him is when he passed.
It’s called coparenting people do it everyday. Just cause you are civil dosent mean you wanna sleep with him you need to make that clear to him. That’s not your child’s problem nor should your child have to suffer because of it. You guys are the adults and kids shouldnt know or have to worry about adult problems or be made to feel like they are the problem. Co parenting is not a bad thing if you can be civil and be friends while doing it.
Omgoodness I could have written this. I don’t really have any advice on how to help you but I can literally relate 100% to everything you said!
I think it sets a good example for your son as long as there are clear boundaries.
Nothing wrong with your child seeing you two being civil. To me it shows him how respect and kindness should be.
Bottom line - if you aren’t comfortable - no. Been there. Lived it. My kids are grown and they did not miss me being there during that weird event.
I would join in. It’s about your son. Many people have wonderfully civil and friendly interactions co-parenting. You are lucky it’s no longer contentious.
He’s 4. He isn’t reading into anything. Ask your x why he wants you to go? Is your son crying for you? Otherwise, only go if it is a true “yes I’d love to” . Down the road there’ll be enough occasions to team up. School, sports, birthday parties etc. can’t he invite his mother ?
You are complicating things with your mind for yourself
Tell Ur ex u have moved on and that you are doing it for the good of Ur son
Talk to Ur son explain things to him,make him see your position at all times
Your son seeing you two be friends is the best thing you could give him
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Tell him you’re so happy that you guys are getting along since you’re co-parenting a little one but you want him to have all of his time with his son. Also explain to him that you don’t want to confuse your son into thinking his parents are getting back together. Stress that you’re glad that you’re getting along and being friendly especially while around your son, that way he understands that you like where your relationship is now.
I dont see how that will confused your child. After my divorce me and my x husband still came together to do family things such as shopping g for our daughter, family dinner here and there, we even took a trip to Disney. Not once did my daughter asked if we are together,she was happy that weren’t fighting.
If you no longer wants to do these things just let him know
I think you’re possibly sending dad mixed signals as well. If you’re truly uncomfortable, stop going.
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I think you sound like a level headed, fantastic mom. Choose outings that make you comfortable. You’re doing a great job.
I think it is great and will be even better if one day when you both have new partners they can also tag along and you can all get along. Your child will have so much love growing up he will be so lucky
Don’t go! The fact that people are telling you that you should go is CRAZY! He’s inviting you because HE wants you there. It has nothing to do with the child. 
so don’t listen to these people that are saying “go so that your child can see that you and the dad can still be friends”. That’s ridiculous. STOP GOING!
Start with a coffee, it’s good for your child to see you both get along, if it can be volatile, a whole meal might be too much right now! It’s good for your child to see ye get along if you can! Do what feels right, it sounds to me that he is trying to show his child that his mom is still important even though he is spending time with dad and that is a good sign but take it slow and in your comfort zone, it’s nothing romantic I feel, it’s for the child! Best of luck whatever you decide, put the child first xx
I see there’s already over a hundred comments on this post so mine might not make a difference but I thought with my experience I’d weigh in here. Have you thought about bringing along your current partner? My current husband of 3 years was convinced in the beginning that he wouldn’t even want my ex in the same room as me, but now we all live in the same house. There’s no confusion, the kids all know we’re not getting back together and once my husband got to know my ex, they’re friends now. We even take my ex out for his birthday lol. Not saying co-habiting with the ex is for everyone and no, there’s nothing kinky going on here either. I’m just saying that if you bring your partner it creates clear boundaries. Just my thoughts on it.
I wouldnt want to confuse my child and I definitely agree I wouldnt want to make my ex think we are getting back together. It’s ok to be uncomfortable with that and say no. Especially if you’re in a new relationship
He may be trying to show your son how he’s supposed to be treating you since you two get along Better as co parents. Just a thought.
I think it would be good for your child to see that his parents can get along and spend time together with him. That is if you guys can get along.
Is your son safe with your ex alone if so step up and start declining. It is sending mix signals to everyone. If the father ask why tell him this time if for him and yall son spend together and time for yall become adults and move on as co parents.
Your gut instinct is there for a reason and it never lies. Listen.
Communicate with your ex. With your current boyfriend. And your child. Be honest.
But you can still be a family and not be together. You can still do things together.
I have 2 girls with the man I was married to. It turned bad and I ended it. He saw the girls all the time and he always wanted me to go do things with them and I always said no. I was scared of him. But may 4th 2019 the 4 of us went to a bday party for a family friend and he died may 5th.
DONT GO. JUST SAY NO. You dont have to go with them. Your ex has motives trust me. He is manipulating you. Don’t confuse your kid. There is a reason you feel uncomfortable. Trust that feeling.
It sounds like he just wants to make it known to your child that even though you two aren’t together that it doesn’t mean you guys can’t get along and do things as a family together.
Go with your gut feeling unless your son really wants you there then I wouldn’t go uf it makes you feel that uncomfortable
You should move on with your life & not feel Guilty … you should go out with your SON even if his father will be there !!! You should only accept on special occasions until you get more comfortable …
Stop going. I think your son will be confused. It won’t be healthy in the long run.
Don’t go.tell ur ex it’s his time to bond with your son alone…simple as that
Personally, I’d go. If he is in a relationship, ask him to bring her along too. The day my divorce was over, me and him went and got ice cream cones, I paid. 🤷
He’s doing it so thing stay civil and showing ur son that u 2 can co-parent and get along so he has both parents
Don’t do it. Don’t fall for what people say. Two lives that’s reality… separate and apart as it should be.
This is a tough one for sure. If your gut says there’s something more, listen. If your gut says it’s innocent and y’all are doing it for your kid, listen to that too. Nothing wrong with either option. At all.
I think going to birthdays or things like that, you should also include your boyfriend too. I think it’s disrespectful to your boyfriend
I dont what kind of guy he is or how your relationship was but I know if this was my ex this would be another way of him manipulating me. He’d use the child and ‘family time’ as a way of guilting me into tagging along just because that’s what he wants. I dont know if that’s his motive or not. Hell, test him out. Next time he invites you out just say no and that you have other plans. If he accepts it no questions asked, good for him. If he gets mad and has negative things to say then you know his intentions werent that great to begin with.