So I just found my little sister on Facebook today after not having any contact with her in over six years…( she’s 11 now) She was taken from my mom by child protection services, then into foster care and after my moms rights were taken away I haven’t heard anything else… Today I put her name into the search bar and found her!!! I’m so overwhelmed with emotions I literally balled for an hour. I saw her so happy and loved! I want to contact her, but I don’t want her to hurt anymore if she remembers everything in the past… I could also message her adoptive parents, but I don’t want them to freak out or something and block me and my chances of ever seeing my sister again. What should I do? Any and all advice would be appreciated
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If she was adopted, you’re not supposed to contact her. But you can definitely contact her parents n see if they’ll let you build a relationship with her! Good luck dear. Me and my sister know all too well how much it hurts to be separated by foster care!
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she is 11 please don’t, seek out the parent of your sister, she is too young… i am sorry!
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Contact the parents especially since she has been adopted. You have no idea what may be going on and what she has been told and you msging her could be traumatic for her
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HUGS HUGS HUGS… If she is only 11 I would contact her parents first. If she is 11 and has a FB it almost seems like her parents are looking for someone to contact her.
Contact the parents.
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Good luck. Best wishes
Message her adoptive parents. I don’t think it’s right to message her first as she is a minor and 6 years ago means she was 5 she may not remember a whole lot.
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I would contact her parents and tell them who you are and that you want to be a part of her life.
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Message parents see if it’s okay first then if it is contact her and for all of you who say your not supposed to msg once adopted no you can as me my brother and sister all three of us were taken from our mother my brother and sister where adopted my brother I can see talk to and even spent the night over when I was 15
if she was older i would say go for it but as shes only 11 go to trhe parents 1st
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So hard not to just message her❤. She might not remember or may have been told things. Maybe message parents first. Be completely open them as well as her.
She’s your sister but she’s a minor. Message her parents first.
I’d go to the parents
Contact the parents first, shes still young and it may be worse for you to go behind their backs then you really may never get a chance to connect with her. The parents I would hope will support your relationship as her sister, but they may set up rules with you being the adult. Good luck i hope it works out!
Message the parents first. If they are any type of decent ppl they will want her to have a relationship with her sister.
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Just friend request her.
No need to talk to her just yet.
Talk with adoptive parents after.
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I’d message her and tell her who you are and give them a phone number and ask her to have her adoptive parents to call her so you can talk about having involvement
Ask her parents first
Contact her adoptive parents before anything please.
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Contact her parents first.
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I would message her adoptive parents 1st.
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God bless you 
I pray everything goes well for you and your sister
Message the parents ,I have an 11 year old that we adopted when she was 2 months old And I’d rather you message me first it shows respect then go from there
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I don’t have experience or insight into this situation. But I am so happy you found your sister!!! 
I hope this works out for the both of you!
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Talk to parents first .
No No! As tempting as it is - don’t!
I’m definitely in your situation not long ago
That over welmed feeling takes over nd you don’t no what to do. My advice do message her and just then let her know it’s you. Nd ur family there ect. Then wait nd see how things go from there… she’s still 11 so be mindful x I found my real dad after 16years. Good luck x
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As she is only 12 contact the adoptive parents. If you don’t feel comfortable doing so, then you can wait till she is 18, as they won’t be able to stop her from having anything to do with you at that age.
Sometimes people put a act on woth social media. So you never truely know what they have or are going through. Hope you get to talk to her x
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Most definitely contact the adoptive parents first. She is still only a child and you have no idea what she may have gone throw emotionally after she was taken. Being blocked by them is a chance your going to have to take unfortunately as they know what’s best for her right now.
If you contact her directly you could really upset her
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Definitely contact parents first. It could be very confusing for her if you try to contact her.
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I would message the parents. She may not know she is adopted (depending on the age).
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Ask the parents first
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Contact parents first.
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I’d definitely message the parents first. Hopefully, they’ll see that as a good start that you didnt want to go behind their backs and upset them or her.
Who knows what she knows? Ya know? Messaging her might confuse or upset her which will definitely upset the parents.
As a parent, I would always want something this huge to go through me first so I can find the best, age appropriate way to deal with it. They know her best and will know the best course of action to take for her.
Be as kind and respectful as possible. Let them know you dont want to overstep their boundaries. Tell them a little about yourself. And be patient as they think things over.
I really, really hope it works out and they let you be involved! Please give us an update!!!
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I was adopted, was when I was 9 years.old. im.now 30.I have tones of family that I didnt even know about.one of.my.aunts found me FB about 5 years ago and I’m.soo happy she did. Shes one of the most amazing people.ive ever met and being back in contact with her makes me feel.more whole. 11 seems a big young for your sisters adopted parents to be letting her on. But maybe they allow2ed it becuse they’ve been trying to find you who knows. Personally I’d send the message to the sister you really sont need her parents permission to contact her.
Go through the parents
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I wouldnt message her but message her adoptive parents. I am sure they have always known one day you would find her and have talked about it between themselves. They would be selfish to block you and i really would be surprised if they did x
You’re her sister not the mom who lost rights to her. I’d sit on it for a couple of days and see how you feel about approaching it. If it were me I’d message her. The 2 of you have a right to know each other. You are sisters.
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No contacting her. Shes under 18 and with a new family. She might have PTSD and u could trigger bad emotions or trigger attack.
You need to talk to her parents now. Ask if you could try!
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I would contact her parents first. But also keep her legal names &her parents name on file Incase they do block you… you’ll have that information to look for her again when she gets older.
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As someone who was adopted, it’s always great to hear from siblings but you don’t know how her parents will feel if you just contacted her without their knowledge. I’d touch base with them first!
Contact the parents first try to be as respectful as possible
Message her and just say you love and miss her and if she ever wants to reach out to you you will be there for her and leave it so it’s in her hands
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Like most everyone else said, you need to contact her parents first to see if they’re ok with it. You should be prepared for whatever they decide to do and respect their decision either way.
Parents first, if it goes bad or they block you for no reason contact her when she turns 18
#admin y’all posted this up twice…
And as I said on your previous post
She’s a minor. If you really want to talk to her you need to contact her adoptive parents first. DONT GO TO YOUR SISTER UNTIL YOU HAVE DISCUSSED IT WITH HER PARENTS FIRST! I’m adopted. While my parents are cool with the hole adoption thing and we’re open and honest about it with me and my siblings, hers may not be. She may not even know she’s adopted. She may not know you exist. Her parents may not have told her. Telling her can cause so many problems honestly. It isn’t worth it to jump straight to her. Go to her parents and see what they want to do about it. It’s not worth tearing an entire family apart just to end up never talking to her anyway. Go to her adoptive parents please. They can decide if it’s ok or not to contact her and how they will go about it before you say anything at all.
RESPECT WHATEVER DECISION THEY COME TOO ALSO. DO NOT GO AGAINST THEIR WISHES IF THEY DONT WANT YOU TO TALK TO HER. RESPECT THEIR FAMILY AS A SEPARATE UNIT FROM YOUR LIFE.
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Contact her parents and say you found her on social media and are interested in having a relationship. It’s their choice, and if they haven’t had certain discussions with her it may be traumatic to learn this information from you. Sounds like she was probably 4 or 5 when she was adopted but even so. She might not really understand what happened. It’s better for that to come from her parents.
You need to talk to the parents first and if they fall out then you may need to wait till she is 18 to try again but if you don’t go through them it could get ugly.
I would suggest contacting the parents and tell them you wanna have a relationship with her but also suggest meeting them first so they are comfortable with you starting a relationship with her and if they ask you not to contact her don’t but pass them your information so when she is of age and would like to connect they have it to pass on as well
Go through the parents. But get a lil more info by snooping a lil in case they do block you. So you have a way to find her in a few years. Happened to my friend. And her siblings had been looking gor her for yearsssss… She didnt even know she had siblings because her adoptive mother kept running her from family. So now shes 45 and just found out she has siblings
Definitely go through the parents first. Good luck!!
I was adopted I went in search of my biological siblings. By law you have to wait until she’s 18 unless you gain permission from the parents. I’d see if from her page you can’t figure out who they are, and message them first.
She was five when removed so I’m sure she remembers that she was. And just because your mom’s parental rights were taken doesnt mean she was adopted. My mom’s rights were terminated but we were never adopted. My dad still had his rights. We spent 16 years in foster care. I was separated from my siblings and always felt a huge void. Like I wasn’t complete.
If you really would like to reach out then contact her foster parents if you’ve got the info. Make sure the legalities and all that.
Please consider the parents first. I say that due to your post it sounds like it could have been a bit rough being taken from her bio mom. Theres going to be alot of emotions. She will need someone that she is close to to talk about all the emotions so they dont turn Into hate or bad behavior. Good luck god bless and dont ever give up. It might not go smoothly at first but remember she is your sister and it may take time to adjust
Contact the family first. See what they say. Then if they allow it contact her. If they don’t wait until she is 18 then contact. Or you could always go to court.
I would check and see if it’s an open or closed adoption. I would then contact DHS if open adoption to maybe get some visitations scheduled. If closed adoption you will have to wait til 18. I went through this finding my niece.
I would call them and talk to them , tell them you have been looking just not where and you believe they have your little sister. That you don’t want to cause any hurt .but would like to meet her or keep in contact with them if she doesn’t remember you .
Honestly I’d wait til she’s 18 or at least older.
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Either wait til she’s 18, or contact the parents
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So I’ve actually gone through this personally. I was adopted at birth. I found both my birth brothers. One was very excited and the other not so much. I think considering her age I would reach out to the adoptive parents out of respect. Wishing you all the best and sending you the biggest hugs
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Wait until she is old enough or see if you can find her parents and message them
Contact the parents…see what they have to say…they know her best at this point.
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I would explain the situation to the adoptive parents. It’s not your fault that she had to go threw what she did and who knows maybe they’d love for you to be apart of her life.
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Ask social services for help , good luck xx
Congratulations and I’m so happy you found her to be loved and happy! I would reach out to her parents. 
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Contact her parents first. If not it’ll look like you’re going behind their back to try and contact her.
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I would contact her adoptive parents and then see how they feel and then they can talk to her and see how she feels about it…
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I’m a foster care worker. Truthfully, your best bet at having an open relationship with your sister, is going through her parents. Let them know that you are in no way trying to be a negative person, you just want to be a support for her and have a relationship with her, and give them your contact information. If they are willing to allow you to have contact, they will reach out.
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Awe god bless u . You and your sister are both inocent in all of this. I say contact parents n hopefully they will be mindful and have an understanding.
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Parents! She isn’t old enough to really grasp the magnitude of this.
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First contact the social workers to find out about her parents,then you get in touch with them tell them your desire and take it from there
I’d definitely reach out to the parents first
Since she was taken from your mom I think you could get in trouble for contacting her only being 11 years old
My niece and nephew were taken from my sister and put into foster care then adopted a few years later and I’m not allowed to contact them
I miss them so much but unfortunately I have to wait until they’re 18(possibly 14). They’re 9 and 10 now
Their older sister(13) was put into paternal grandmas care and she even has to go through the adoptive parents
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Contact the parents first, she is still very young and they should be able to get contact started
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Talk to her parents and see if you can get a phone number or maybe a pic wishing you the best of luck.
Im a birth mom. I say contact parents first 
Think you should talk to her adopted parents first, Do the right thing. Your sister probably wants to see you too.
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Don’t say anything to the parents ,they will block you , just be happy with what you have for now dear !
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Your best way is to go trough the adoptive parents that way your showing to them that you care about her mental well-being… but it might be worth contacting social worker too as there may be something put into place for siblings etc ? What a hard situation 
xx
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My little sister who I hadn’t seen since she was 4 mos old found me and messaged me after like 23ish years. And I also have a brother and he has cut off all contact with anyone who has even tried to message him from our family. I would say wait and see where shes at, since shes so young I would definitely contact the parents before her, if you choose to go that route.
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I would countack her parents first
So long as you’re not doing anything underhanded, reach out to her parents. They’ll likely be okay with siblings reconnecting. Just thank them for raising and loving her and ask if you could reach out, maybe suggest speaker phone so they can be involved too. And I would just avoid the subject of her being taken unless she brings it up, but keep details vague until she’s older.
I would contact the parents and explain that you in no way want her to hurt and if its ok could you reach out to her or have them reach out to her. If not could they let you know she is safe and loved.
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Connect to her plz she needs family
You should go through her parents. She’s been through a lot and as u pointed out she’s loved and well cared for. Her parents will make a correct decision regarding her well being
Talk to the state first they usually have a program to introduce siblings I think
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As an adoptive parent, I would recommend reaching out to the parents. My daughters bio brother contacted me in the earlier years asking to contact her. I allowed it, after talking with daughter and making sure she was ok with it and on her terms.
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I personally would contact her parents first
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Contact the parents. First and explain who you are and why you wanna talk with your sister most are willing to let siblings back in there lives but your mom won’t be allowed contact
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No 11 yr old should be on FB, But I am glad you found her. But I will agree with the other, contact her adoptive parents & explain everything to them
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You should definitely reach out to parents first. Do you still have contact with mother who lost yall or her?
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She’s a minor. If you really want to talk to her you need to contact her adoptive parents first. DONT GO TO YOUR SISTER UNTIL YOU HAVE DISCUSSED IT WITH HER PARENTS FIRST! I’m adopted. While my parents are cool with the hole adoption thing and we’re open and honest about it with me and my siblings, hers may not be. She may not even know she’s adopted. She may not know you exist. Her parents may not have told her. Telling her can cause so many problems honestly. It isn’t worth it to jump straight to her. Go to her parents and see what they want to do about it. It’s not worth tearing an entire family apart just to end up never talking to her anyway. Go to her adoptive parents please. They can decide if it’s ok or not to contact her and how they will go about it before you say anything at all.
RESPECT WHATEVER DECISION THEY COME TOO ALSO. DO NOT GO AGAINST THEIR WISHES IF THEY DONT WANT YOU TO TALK TO HER. RESPECT THEIR FAMILY AS A SEPARATE UNIT FROM YOUR LIFE.
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Go through the adoptive parents. It’s the respectful thing to do, especially with her being so young. She’s 11, she’s going to need the emotional support of her team to help her with this.
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I’d reach out to the parents first and respect their wishes, ask if it’s ok and you’ll understand if they say not right now.
GOD BLESS YOU
I would go through the adoptive parents first! especially because she is so young
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yes, talk to the state. they will contact the parents and it will b easier for both of u cz they will guide u how to reconnect.
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Do happy for you both. Just do the right thing for both of you. Pray on it he help you do the right thing.
Reach out to her parents first, explain that you only want what’s best for her but you also miss her, and had nothing to do with the reason she was removed, if they want you to wait a few years, respect that and reach out again when shes a bit older.
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