Wow what a bitch. My exes parents never accepted me or his children let alone purchased anything for them. Never have they watched the kids my own family won’t unless I pay them. I would be so grateful to have you as a MIL.
Honestly she just sounds like a first time mum who didn’t get to pick out anything for their kid. It kills the excitement and prep for new baby. Or maybe it’s something else you did unintentionally.
Just because you bought a lot of things does not mean you don’t rub her the wrong way. I would approach it like you want to know what is going on and how you can improve the relationship. Back off and let her learn how to parent and make choices for her kids.
Everyone else commenting like this woman is a god- she obviously isn’t telling the other person’s side and is likely leaving out huge personality details. Please just keep in mind there are 2 sides to every situation.
4 Likes
I can’t stand my husband’s mother or grandmother 
maybe it’s just her personal problem. Sounds like your doing all the right things
She sounds like she is ungrateful and using you. I would of took a picture of the convo and showed it to my son. Then I would tell my son I love him I will not be used and let her see how much a baby really cost and what sitting cost as well.
12 Likes
The red neck in me says hell yeah confront her but the practical me says don’t. If that was me I’d have to vent (with tears) to my son. The nerve and on your phone to shed not that smart that’s for sure. You sound like a nice person. I hope everything works out for you. 
Ungrateful,Unappeciative, Loser
I learned the hard way, dont help someone unless they ask for it.
My oldest son is married. It’s difficult sometimes to be a mother n law, grandma. Dont let her walk all over you as a sitter either. I know what your talking about, regarding leaving the kid’s with anyone. My brother’s ex did it so often. When they came to pickup my niece, they would say “give kisses goodbye” their daughter kissed them!
Try and talk to her directly.
Nana it’s always better to step back from toxic circumstances. Some people don’t know what they’ve got till it’s gone. Also why not confront them, keep an honest and open dialect to build a better relationship and find out what the underlying problem is. By the sounds of what you stated you’re only assuming why she dislikes you. It might not be about you buying the gifts but how they are received, if they’re always being thrown in her face that you got her all those things. Maybe she’s going through Postpartum. Maybe she’s tainted by mother figures if her mother isn’t around.
Talk to your son. Maybe you did or said something that was taken wrong?
1 Like
I’m saying you can feel free to come help me…some people dont appreciate people they should
She sounds like a selfish brat. Not to mention not a very responsible mother. If you have them that often. Even on her days off week after week. And sometimes she doesn’t even pick them up? Is she on drugs? Where’s your son at through this all? That would be a tough situation. It sounds like you would be a lot better off with full custody of them. Sounds like they are both not ready to be parents. Maybe talk with your son about everything and go from there. But go about it in a non threatening way. Because it sounds like the best place for those babies to be is with you. Especially since you said she would leave them with just anyone. Yikes. Hopefully they grow up ASAP and stop having babies until they can be more responsible.
She’s an ungrateful person.
There’s so many of us that would appreciate a Nana like you… love them babies but take a break from her
3 Likes
she sounds like an asshole. I understand you love your grandchildren, but your daughter inlaw needs to learn a few lessons.
Lesson one, no more help from you. She will feel it, and if she chooses to blackmail you with the kids, thats up to you how you deal with it. Best advice, dont give into the horrid thing, stuff that.
I say she’s ungrateful
She’s definitely using you. Your doing WAY too much 
1 Like
There 3 sides to everything. your story, her story and the truth. Id like to hear her side
1 Like
Talk to her. Tell her
Did she ASK you to buy those things? Do you respect her as a mom around her children/your son? Do you listen to her rules in regards to her children? Maybe you do overstep bounds and dont realize it, but she doesnt want to say anything so YOU wont tell her your not keeping their kid anymore. My MIL pushes boundaries all the time but doesnt think shes doing anything wrong and it does get really irritating.
7 Likes
She hates you because she hates herself. She sees stuff about herself that she doesn’t want to be and sees you and the parts she wants to be. So her brain translation to her is she hates you but it’s really jealousy.
You need to talk to your son!!! He needs to know about this.
1 Like
Confront the son. Do what you can for him and his baby , never mind her if shes ungrateful and mean.
2 Likes
let me say this because my mother in law feels I am ungrateful, I feel she over steps boundaries. Recently we had a fight over the fact she put my daughter to bed with milk I have fought with her about this issue many times we don’t do that, for multiple reasons and in her mind I am ungrateful because who cares if she didn’t do want to clearly stated multiple times that we don’t do she was doing me the favor of taking care of my daughter her grand daughter. It finally clicked with me that we will never repeat never be on the same page on how my children should be cared for, but it is a choice to make it a problem. Because honestly she would never have the intention on hurting my daughter to get back at me.
2 Likes
Honest to god, i wish my mom or SO’s mom was even half this nice. Shit happens and families have issues. I believe you all will get through it. My mom wont even answer the phone when i call just to vent or have someone to talk to. I havent heard from her in weeks even though ive tried to message her. & my SO’s mother threatened to knock me out on christmas and refused to see her son or granddaughter (I told him to take the baby without me and he didnt want to since it was 3 hours away and she was only a month old). All I did was unfriend the woman on facebook. Never said a rude word to her or about her to anyone.
In afrikaans they stank vir dank
It might not be true at all. It might be just talk.
Hard situation, you need to talk to her to find out why she feels this way but I would avoid telling her how you found out as she may get defensive and that will make that problem worse, maybe just say to her lately I feel like you are a bit distant and I was just want to know you are ok and I hope I haven’t done anything to make you feel any type of way ect ya know something along those lines and see what she says it may just be a big misunderstanding and if niether of you want to confront the other about the issues its never going to get sorted
2 Likes
Ask her straight up what her problem is.
Talking to your son about her will just make her more angry and make your son feel he’s stuck in the middle.
3 Likes
Sounds like she’s being an ungrateful brat. I would definitely mention it to your son, then try to forgive and keep being the good person you are
3 Likes
I think maybe ask her about her feelings, don’t demand. Tell her you have been so excited for another grandchild that you may have gone oberboard and you are sorry of she feels a little smotheres that was not your intention. Leave the door open to her so she can talk to you or else it will get worse. Neither of you seem to be really talking to each other
2 Likes
Is anyone else noticing the reoccurring phrases in all these ‘fan questions’? Have a feeling they’re all from one person lol 
3 have used the phrase ‘feel some type of way’ these past few days alone and theres definitely other reoccurring things
3 Likes
keep being you, be the mum and grandma that you are and have always been she is probably expecting to be able to turn this into one hell of a fiasco don’t fuel her petty nasty crap 
5 Likes
I would say this back off abit let her see how hard it is without you. People on here commenting standing up for her when others would kill to have a MIL like you.
14 Likes
the question I’d be asking is how valid is the “found out” source? Perhaps step back, ask to have a family meeting with a mediator, air your concerns and if you have the strength, let all parties know that you will play the consummate inlaw and not be too overly involved anymore.
Let me get this straight…she hates you and was using your phone? If she hates you then why does she want to use your phone? She’s an ungrateful hypocrite.
5 Likes
Well maybe you did overstep it going out and buying everything for their baby, maybe they as parents would have liked to gone out and bought things for their baby or at least been able to pick the things they liked or wanted. End of the day it’s their baby not yours so perhaps that has frustrated her. Sounds like your pretty judgey of her anyway saying she will leave her kids with anybody. Do you like her? This all sounds very petty to me, you snooped and read a message that wasn’t meant for your eyes which wasn’t pleasant but would you still feel the same judgey way about her parenting had you not seen that message?? Sounds to me like it’s two sided here. Maybe you just need to get over it and put the kids first if you want to maintain a good relationship with them or sit down and talk to the mother and see what she has to say about it all.
2 Likes
Maybe she feels like you’re overbearing? Talk to your son and have him talk to her. That’s hard but dont let it bother you too much. Maybe she was just talking. Maybe it was a time when she upset about something that happened and she said it in the moment but that doesn’t mean that she really ment it. She sounds like she’s taking advantage of you though and that isn’t right either
1 Like
Well I definitely think you over stepped boundaries by snooping through her messenger. If you would’ve minded your business, then everything would be peachy in your eyes. I can tell there’s an issue because you went through her messages and your “oblivious” to why she doesn’t like you. You’re nosy and probably in their business a lot. Just playing devil’s advocate here, because you sound like someone I know. I’m sure you’re a great nana, but you probably throw getting the kids stuff in their face. You help, but are quick to tell anyone and everyone how much you do for them like on here and she may find that annoying. I would just leave it alone and keep the schedule that you’re on, because if you call her out on it, she’s going to know that you went snooping through her messages. You don’t always have to like your kids’ spouse or they don’t have to like you. Just keep being there for your grandchild.
9 Likes
This is your point of view. You should try to see hers. No one is ever overbearing on purpose you might not notice. Also this sounds like a new baby she might be still healing.
2 Likes
I would ask her about it with my son present. I would tell her I found her comments left on my phone and left open I assume so I could read the content. I would ask her what I had done to deserve words like the ones she choose to use to describe her feelings about me. I would then let her have the floor to explain her feelings. Prayers may God bless you.
5 Likes
You poor thing that’s so sad! What an ungrateful girl. So sorry. You can’t get angry or she will punish you … maybe speak to your son quietly and explain all this?
2 Likes
Sounds like an ungrateful spoilt little sh** who doesn’t care that much about the kids and needs to grow tf up 
like damn, at least kids are safe with u
My MIL says the exact same thing. According to her all she ever does is try to help and doesn’t understand why we’re so mean.
On the flip side, she’s tried to break into my house. She’s threatened kidnapping. She’s taken some of her grandbabies with her to buy pills and doesn’t see an issue with that other than us having a problem with it. That’s just the tip of the iceberg but we’re assholes because she’s buys the baby things and we decline. 
Just because you don’t see the issue or agree with it doesn’t mean it’s not still a problem.
Ask your son about it
1 Like
Not your problem. Move on maybe you do too much. Fall back
2 Likes
My MIL is the same way and was the same way when I had my baby. If I could pay her for what she did, I would . I’m eternally grateful to her. That little girl is ungrateful.
2 Likes
Let your son worry about buying what his child needs and stop watching the children. Let them parent and dont worry about it unless they are not ol taking care of their children.
2 Likes
Ok, here’s my opinions on this…
I’m extremely lucky, I have a great relationship with my boyfriend’s family, especially his mom and step mom. If I need anything, to talk, cry, advice, money, baby items, anything- I can call them both at any time. But, I am honest with them. I tell them if I do not want or like something and most importantly, THEY ASK ME WHAT I LIKE, WANT, OR WHAT I NEED FROM THEM AND WHAT THEY CAN DO!!! Granted, I do get some unsolicited advice from time to time, but that’s NOTHING compared to what most deal with. I LOVE my boyfriend’s mom and step mom. They call me their daughter, I call them my moms! It’s a very special relationship especially since most do not get this. But what I’m getting at is, they ASK me what I need and want. They never just buy random shit especially if I didnt ask. They will always contact me first. Not my boyfriend lol ME!!! I did not read where you asked her anything… so that may bother her. And it rightfully should. You DID push yourself into being the savior unsolicited. She may also be hurt because you do sound to be a bit like the type to constantly remind folks what you do and what they dont. So, that’s a huge issue, and a huge driving force for anger and resentment
Now, on the other hand, yes she should be more appreciative of you and your gifts, and she should try to communicate more, but, it works both ways. Plus you shouldnt have read messages that weren’t yours no matter if they were on your phone or not. Now you need to be honest and live with the consequences
Firstly, how old is she? Secondly who did she say she hates you to? Maybe with that person she has to say things like that. Some people are scared to say how they really feel about someone due to another person being toxic and say things that make it clear they do not want you to like that person. I would just talk to her and get her side of the story, you never know what could be going on behind closed doors when you aren’t around. Even if she is a grown adult she could still be easily manipulated and/or affected by toxic people
2 Likes
Step back people, all good advice taken on board, my advice is to step back and leave alone until needed and yes nana duties will be needed at some point let the woman spend her own money on what she wants, I have learnt the hard way also
1 Like
Just step back. If she doesn’t appreciate it, then okay stop doing it. Only do what you can and don’t go out of your way to help her out. I know it’s hard with them grandbabies.
1 Like
You could be my kids grandma and buy them whatever you want!!!
I’ll adopt you to be my MIL lol! If she doesn’t want you I’ll take you! 
1 Like
She is obviously an ungrateful selfish brat! There are so many people who suffer and their kids do without because they financially can’t get everything they need/want. I think that’s amazing of you to be able to go above and beyond! You keep being an awesome nana! Don’t let some selfish brat hurt your feeling!
1 Like
#HonorYourParents (this breaks my heart) Ive recently met a religious parent that wished her first child to be aborted out of 4 children all different fathers. She blamed the alcohol. Abused and also kicked out of every household for 20+ years. Even the Grandparents are just as bad. Let’s just say he will never ever feel a mother’s love, he will never have a family to come home to. Traumatized so much theirs no such thing as a safe haven.
You’re a good mother and a great grandmother and even a better being, she will never truly know what it is like to have someone to care Unconditionally. I think It be should noted and remembered that she may not be trustworthy. I would let her know cordially how you feel then walk away. XO
1 Like
My son has been with his wife for about 10 years married over 3. She is starting to communicate now. Just let it go and back off My MIL was never a grandma. She was kind of the perfect one, ,Makeup, dyed her hair, dressed to the T. I always felt out of place around her cause I was a country gal. Didn’t hate her just uncomfortable. She babysat one time. She totally undressed my son gave him a bath (he had one already) think she was checking for anything on his body. Was divorced then. I let it go. Just back off some and take care of your grand baby and don’t pressure to take care of baby. Continue to be nice to her. Defeat with kindness. It will work out. If you have the message send back to her? No comment just she forgot and left it on your phone. That is if you want her know that you know.
For one thing people use the word hate far too easily and I doubt she actually does hate you
In saying that you probably have overstepped the mark a bit. This was her first baby and she might have wanted to buy a lot of things herself, it’s a big deal and you took that away from her. So she probably hurt as well. It’s also probably made her feel incompetent and unable to provide for her own child. You need to see her side of things. A lot of it can be as simple as pride
2 Likes
Maybe you’re one of those overbearing, pushy mother in law’s. Maybe she wanted to buy her own shit for the baby. Can’t believe everything from a one sided Facebook rant. Leave her alone to mother how she pleases.
Perhaps you could try a different approach. From your point of view, you’ve gotten her everything she could need for the baby… but did you discuss any of it with her? My husband’s ex’s parents buy things for the kids all the time but never discuss with us first. We end up with duplicates or the kids get things we don’t want them to have, but we can’t very well say ‘you can’t have that’ when their grandparents have given them something.
Maybe you do to much try to back off and let them ask for things so they feel like they are in control. Hope things get easier for you
I damn sure wouldn’t do one more thing for her and absolutely I’d call her out. She is taking advantage of you full heartedly.
8 Likes
For many young mothers its all about control, power and jealousy. You see it as helping she sees it as interfering. Do you ask her opinion or just do it. Do you treat her like a child or a friend. Step back from your hurt ask yourself if your MIL did what you did when you were a new mom would you have welcomed it or balked at it?
5 Likes
I would clearly confront her in a loving,kind way and just say …I seen the message that was left on my phone and I’m really hurt …did I do or am I doing something that had caused you to feel like this…and than just hear what she has to say and go from there.
12 Likes
She will learn to appreciate later, if she matures the proper way. I would definitely talk to my son, if I was in that place, but other than that, step back, let her look for you and ask for help, when she wants and needs it.
Sometimes let the other person miss you and everything you do, would help as a wake up call for them. For other people, there will be never a point to appreciate others because they are selfish and too busy looking after themselves only.
1 Like
Pray about it and for her. I know it’s a touchy situation when them Grandbabies are involved but I do agree with the other posts that you are being taken advantage of by her.
5 Likes
I was in same situation with my MIL. She loved me until her son and I got engaged. I cleaned her townhouse once a week on my day off, we bought her new things that she needed, we text on regular basis and we visited her often. Then she had to move and I took off work and helped move her, organize her new apt. and cleaned her townhouse that she moved out of. Then she started telling lies and playing my husband and I against each other. She came to our house for Thanksgiving last year. We had 30 guest. My mil threw a fit because we had friends there and went out the door and fell down some stairs. She was ok but I finally spoke to my husband and told him I couldn’t handle her meanness anymore. He agreed that she was treating me badly. So I quit doing for her and do not visit her anymore. She told my husband she hated country people! I’m a country gal! My husband will not confront her meanness and pacifies her because shes old. It is slowly causing our marriage problems. I encourage him to visit and run errands for his mother. Now, she wants to move in with us and me care for her. I cannot allow this. I also have a son age 30 who is special needs and she makes fun of him. I will not put her before my son.
Anyway…talk to your son about what u read. I would quit doing all the buying stuff unless they need food. And babysit occasionally but dont let her take advantage of you. Maybe you could take her out for lunch and just confront her. God bless
6 Likes
Be careful because it sounds just like what happened to my son. He wound up with a narcissist person and they have 2 boys and they are now divorced and she won’t let me see the kids at all. Because the kids love being with me. My son is fighting her for sole custody and I’m praying heavily that he will get it. She is crazy and doesn’t need to have those children full time. It is a struggle daily as I miss my grandsons terribly. So I feel you. Just try to make the most of the time you have with the children and try to make sure she doesn’t alienate your son from you also. Because mine did that. It has been horrible dealing with it all. Good luck and God bless you.
I admire you for being in your grand children. Some grand parents could careless. You need to sit her down and talk work her and ask her why? She need to be known she is blessed to even have you. Don’t even listen to the negative comments. Keep doing what you are doing. Hugs.
1 Like
I damn sure wouldn’t go above and beyond for her anymore. If she doesn’t appreciate it, she doesn’t deserve it. When she asks why, you say you don’t go out of your way for people with hatred toward you in their heart.
16 Likes
Everyone will not like you, no matter what you do for them. Unfortunately, most of us find this out the hard way. In my case it was my mother in law who did not like me, she believed I stole her son from her and that I kept our children away from her…until she was sick and moved into our home and had the opportunity to actually “see” me. Between our work schedules and kids activities (they were much less than they were when the kids were smaller) she was able to see that we really didn’t have the time to coddle her. I have always been good to my husband but she didn’t see that because we weren’t around her all of the time. When she left this world 8 months later she had a different perspective of who I am as a wife, mother, stepmother, grandmother, friend, and daughter in law.
2 Likes
I wouldn’t talk to your son about this. It’s not about him and you’ll come across as trying to cause conflict between them.
It may be you are overstepping by doing too much?
I would be careful about how you go about talking to her. You invaded her privacy. I would just sit down with her and say something like “I feel like there’s tension between us and you don’t like me… Am I doing something wrong?”
Also, y’all don’t have to like each other. You just have to be polite. It’s not important that she likes you. Only that she makes your son happy and takes care of her kids… Even if it’s not the way you want or would do it.
1 Like
There are two sides to every story. It has been my experience with some Nana’s including my own that they paint themselves as the consummate saint when really they are overbearing, controlling, and manipulative. I apologize if I offend anyone with that but so often I see grandmothers (as I said, including my own) who put too much value in the material and then the second the daughter in law disagrees or tries to assert her own authority over her own kids it’s, “Woe is me, she hates me and is going to steal those babies away from me and they are my life!” Now maybe she has no reason to hate you. Maybe you are the perfect Nana as you claim. But I’d be curious to see what exactly was said besides just that she hated you and to know her side of the story.
13 Likes
Truth is you came across this info by reading her messenger there are boundaries that shouldn’t be crossed and that will only make her pull further from you. When we learn to do things out of love rather then reward life is better and less hurt feelings too:)
Do for your grandchildren, not for her. If its in her power to learn how to be a good mother, then leave it to her. If shes simply a vapid person with no good reason to hate you, and does anyway, then no matter what you do for her, it wont be good enough. Be there for your grandbabies, be a good nana, but NOT an enabler to a clearly unappreciative brat.
18 Likes
I would quit buying things right away. Second, you need to have a talk with your son and her. Explain what you found and show them. Then ask what they want. Does it mean you give everything and do whatever they want? No way. Perhaps watch the kids 1-2 days a week. Make it more fun. They need to realize what you were doing was out of love and she has abused the babysitting aspect clearly.
4 Likes
I would be careful so she doesn’t use the kids against you.My sister in law was this way about her fiance’s mother when she bought everything needed for the baby.I would have been so grateful.our son followed seven months after her daughter and we had no help,not even a baby shower even though I threw one for her.She was spiteful that she didn’t get to be pick everything out.Most of the clothes weren’t even used even though it was Gymboree.
1 Like
I would go to my son and talk to him about the situation let him know what I’ve seen and discuss with him how you should go about handling this. if you don’t bring it to their attention and discuss the matter it’s only gonna get worse because that anger you have towards her is just going to go on until you get angry about something else and then finally go off on her
1 Like
Well I tell you stop doing all that you’re doing. She doesn’t deserve it! You’re teaching her how to treat you. I’d pull the rug on her
6 Likes
Have you talked to your son?
I would definitely talk to him and then I would talk to her and tell her what you read. Ask her why she feels that way.
And I would not buy another thing unless its food for those babies.
7 Likes
Can you be my mother in law? 
i wish mine was like that, not fair how ungrateful woman gets to have the best in laws … sorry you have to deal with a evil daughter in law. She doesn’t deserve your kindness.
2 Likes
Boy she’s a really and ungrateful two faced woman who cannot stand her as Nana want to be friendly with them. I felt very sorry for generous woman.
I know you say you’re not overstepping, and it may not seem like you are, to you, but everyone has different boundaries. I had an issue similar with my grandmother in law where she would just buy whatever she wanted for them, whatever style or pattern she wanted, without listening to me. I said I wanted a certain theme for my oldests room and she did everything she could to buy anything but that because she didn’t like it. I grew to resent her until we finally had a sit down where I pointed out that I had not picked out a single piece of furniture in my house because she found it all/gave it all. And I appreciate the help, but I didn’t appreciate being left out of everything and feeling like I wasn’t part of the discussion. She asked me what I wanted for my birthday, I told her I wanted gift cards to ikea so I could get some kitchen stuff and a bookshelf for my daughtr’s room. She didn’t like that so she asked my husband what she should get me and he said a Victoria secret gift card. I hate Victoria secret. Guess what I got for my Mother’s Day, birthday AND Christmas gifts? So I would sit down and have a discussion as adults about your concerns and see what she had to say.
4 Likes
Do what you can to continue the relationship with your grandchildren but distance yourself from her. Bless and release…take care of your mental well being first and foremost.
U clearly are overstepping your line and she doesnt want you mothering her family too hence shes abusing your kindness. The best way to make someone appreciate you is not to be available for them.
4 Likes
Well that stinks you sound great, while reading I noticed you say I do this and I do that. (Aside from babysitting) maybe she just isn’t interested in you buying everything, maybe she would like to pick out her own things and not feel obligated to use all the things you buy. You know like clothing or stuff. People love to receive things but there does come a time when enough is enough already . Like you constantly walk in to their house with a bag of things … maybe stop doing so much calm down with all the nice things you do so she wonders why it all went away and isn’t so common like it used to be…
As for watching the kids, yeah I get it either you do it or someone else will so you might as well make sure they are safe, makes sense to me just makes sure she isn’t taking advantage.
I would never ask anyone to watch my kids if I was off work. So if she is working and you are helping her that is one thing but other days shit they are her responsibility.
1 Like
I wouldn’t take it personal, she sounds like the type of person that hates everyone. It hurts your feelings because you are obviously a good person. I’m the type of person that would confront her tho. Last thing, pray about it, ask God to ease your pain and soften her heart.
Stop doing anything…absence makes the heart grow fonder and you would be hurt any longer !
I think you should say something. This is disrespectful to you and you do not have to sit back and take this bs. Set some boundaries but do it with both your son and her.
2 Likes
Oh I’d love to have you as my mother in law. I have no one I can trust to watch my babies. What a blessing you are. I’m sorry you are not being appreciated.
9 Likes
I would talk to your son about it and show him the message. Don’t confront her because if she hasn’t told you directly how she feels she probably will make an excuse. Hate is a strong word, I would definitely discuss with my son the babysitting situation and have him talk to her. It’s not your place
I don’t think it’s hate. I think it’s lack of respect. Maybe give that some thought?
3 Likes
I think youve done too much, back off and see how she responds. You sound like a great nana
Stop being Santa clause, stop babysitting all the time.boundaries need to be set with that. You are the only one that can allow yourself to be used than hated.
Back off. Sometimes our children’s choices are people that truly don’t like us and you’re trying to buy your way in.
1 Like
I would definitely talk to her.
And if you are interested in salvaging your relationship with her then Don’t involve Your son.
1 Like
I don’t know both sides but i know what I’ve observed in my 42 years. A lot of the young people now days are very entitled and ungrateful to the point that they expect you do these things but also at the same time envy or despise that you are in a situation that you can. I know when i was a young mother i wouldn’t leave my children with ANYONE except my parents and my husband’s parents because i was fearful of them being molested/mistreated/neglected etc… i have found that a lot of parents that are emotionally healthy and in healthy marriages being upstanding, working class citizens are the same way. The young adults that are or feel entitled or are wild or overly spoiled and lack a sense of general responsibility are more likely to be the opposite… if you have truly bent over backwards for her and she still hates you… this is her problem and not yours. There is likely nothing you can do to make her like you. I get that you don’t want to tell her no but this is exactly what she needs! Boundaries! I have a grandson who i adore but i also have to work a full time job and I’m still raising a son of my own. My daughter is very respectful of the fact that I can’t keep my grandson more than on occasion. But it’s her son and he’s her responsible and she knows that. I think a lot of times we over do for our children or their spouses it causes them to “expect” and they can actually lose respect for us. Sorry you are hurt and experiencing this! Prayers for you!!
3 Likes
id tell her you read her message and id stop buying things for the kids. Id still babysit them if you like to have them in your care often, But the mommy needs to learn the things you have been doing are very nice but at some point she needs to start doing them herself
You should talk to your son about this, he probably has no idea what she is doing to you
My mother always told me The more you help some people the more they crap on you. I too had a daughter in law like this. I feel for you because she has the power to keep those kids away from you. So just love the kids be there for them you can’t do
Anything to help her so just act like you don’t know. It’s HER problem not yours you did nothing wrong. Hang in there. Your
A wonderful person. She doesn’t decide wh
At kind of person you are and don’t give her that power.
I think she just wanted to impress someone, and I wouldn’t worry about it.
Well sounds like she is intimidated by you. She is very jealously of you. Some moms don’t have it all together like you. Can I ask you a question do you take her places like invite her to like get your nails done or just a picnic in the park with the grand babies, maybe she didn’t get any attention growing up and sees how loved her babies are by you. Try to at least be nice to her go out to dinner with her get to know her first. She may have old issues that she needs to work out not you. There’s always some hurt issues in there past with there parents that maybe if you get her alone she may open up about it. Try to have a relationship with her first before you throw in the towel. Maybe her coming across rude is her saying I feel left out. Maybe who knows. I don’t like to judge a person until I know the whole story. Don’t bring up the messages it will only mess things up even worse. Give her love show her support by giving her flowers give her a card let her know you love her. Please update us I will be praying for Gods peace for you guys.