I have a 6 and a 7 year old, both boys, and we recently learned their older half brother, 17, has been waking them up at night to let them watch horror movies, play horror games, and other way inappropriate, gory, graphic things when he stayed the night. Somehow they all managed to keep it a secret until the 7 year old told a classmate about how cool it is to kill people in a game called evil within. Now that the secret is out, they are constantly pretending to kill each other, talking about blood and guts and murder. We havenât heard anything sexual from them, yet. Weâre wait listed for counseling for them, theyâve had assemblies at school, weâve grounded them, taken away toys and fun time but they wonât stop! INFO: their half brother is from my husbandâs first marriage that ended in his ex wifeâs infidelity. Sheâs the one who is giving him the violent games and movies. He uses his computer she bought him to play them after weâve gone to bed. We had no idea he was bringing them over. Now that the secret is out hes refusing to come, which heâs allowed to at his age now. Heâll be 18 in a few months. Our problem isnât him playing or watching the stuff, itâs actively encouraging his younger brothers to. Itâs been at least 6 months of weekend overnight visits. At 15 he was given total choice on where he spends his time.
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. I found out my step-son has been letting my kids play violent games - Mamas Uncut
Are the kids having issues because of it? Not sure why counseling would be needed unless theyâre having nightmares or something?
Everyoneâs different. If it was me, it wouldnât be such a big deal. I wouldâve simply told my stepson to please stop showing them those and that would be the end of it.
Iâd turn off the WiFi at night when he comes over
Youâre making a bigger deal out of it than it is. Counseling? For being boys? Just talk with the older brother. While theyâre young, you ainât gonna be able to shelter them forever.
Making a big deal out of nothing turn off the wifi your kids will be fine about watching horror stuff.
Turn off the WiFi when he there
Counseling? heâll eventually forget about the games, try getting him interested in a different game with less or no violence. I think youâre the one who needs counseling Lol!
Aw brotherly bonding
Do not ride off your step son over something like this. That is a mistake you will pay for for a long time.
Give an ultimatum. Do again and you will leave.
Ex wifeâs indefinitely like wtf does that have to do with anything
Counseling? For some video gamesâ:roll_eyes:? I bet they had the time of their life !! They will be angry and resentful having to sit through therapy over this.
Theyâre boys thatâs what they do tell him that itâs inappropriate to talk about killing people that itâs just a game having your kids listed in therapy you need the therapy my son played games at five years old he is still at 13 the sweetest most lovable list kid that used to run around pretending to shoot everything LOL get over yourself
Boys will be boys and you do not need Wi-Fi To play these games by the way
Maybe you should go to counseling?
Youâre going to ruin their relationship with their brother. This is super intense for no reason. If they arent having problems are hurting anyone, counseling is super not needed.
Iâve been watching horror movies and playing horror video games since I was a toddler. Iâm not a murderer. Your kids will be probably fine.
If it doesnât bother the kids, why does it really matter this much. He likes them enough to make memories. Those kids will always remember harmless fun in getting woken up by their older cool brother to watch scary movies in the middle of the night, get scared silly for a couple hours, and feeling safe with him when he sends them back to bed. He obviously likes them and they obviously like him. And you made him feel like he did a terrible thing. I dont really blame him. Youâve made him out to be a monster.
News flash. A lot of kids watch that kind of stuff behind their parents back. Or even with their parents. And boys tend to play that way as well, btw. You could do a lot worse than a teenage boy who clearly adores spending time with his kid brothers.
I would sit the step son down and explain he is almost an adult and can process more of what he sees than the little boys can.
I would allow him to do in his free time his thingâŚbut forbid he shares those aspects with the littles.
This is the compromise I would allow so to honor some of his independence yet facilitate a helathier environment when he is present.
I am sorry. This is so disturbing, especially as youâve been sheltering thier innocence.
Like they donât see this everyday on TV.
Sounds like you just donât like the step son
Are you sure the older brother is waking them up to let them play or are your boys asking him to let them play?
Either way, Iâd just turn off the wifi and keep doors open when theyâre playing on their computers.
Maybe talk to your stepson and just ask him to please not let the boys ply the games he plays because you donât think itâs appropriate but donât be mean about it
Sounds like your angry at the other momâŚits natural for kids to be curious about games and scary moviesâŚand why are you worried about sexual stuff? Counseling? Your doing the most
It doesnât seem to be affecting them if theyâre having fun about it, so why the counselling? Its that you donât like it but sounds like they do. Theyâll eventually see it sooner or later. If a gory thing pops up on TV do you immediately turn it off? You canât shelter them from these things they innocently find them on YouTube too
As someone who watched horror movies at the age of 5 and played outside most of my childhood with my friends who also pretended we were cops and robbers. Or whatever else we could think of. Aliens, monsters etc. This isnât a huge deal. Theyâre pretending not actually doing. I think this is way out of proportion to be honest.
Lol helmet mom forsure I was playing gta vice city at 5 years old and Iâm just fine youâre def overreacting
I would be more upset about disturbing the little ones sleep and then address age appropriate videos. Good time to have a discussion about boundaries.
The 17 year old wakes them up to go into his room and watch him? THAT is the weird part. Not the kid playing video games.
Yikes! Do you like your step-son?
Iâm just asking because you have seemed to jumped the gun a tad! If I was him I wouldnât want to come over either if Iâm feeling sorry for him just by your post! He probably feels uncomfortable!
He should respect your rules for the kids not being further exposed but unless youâve left out a huge detailâŚâŚ theyâll be fine. Sounds like counseling for a video game is extra to the max!
Hope this works out for all of you
So stop their imagination? You canât hide them from the world forever instead of punishing them you should make sure you talk to them and let them know that itâs all just games and acting on movies. Theyâre gonna see it sooner or later but trying to punish them for seeing it and liking it as boys thatâs definitely not the way Iâd go about it! And why does the ex wives actions need to be brought up? I feel like youâre making a bigger deal of it because you have a lot against the ex wife
Trying to throw the ex wife under the busâŚwhat she did or didnât do has nothing to do w the boys being curiousâŚtoxic much?
The brother isnât a pedophile because he showed your kids video games and horror movies, wtf. Nobody showed us how to make our Barbieâs scissor but we still did it, grow up lady.
I have grown children, and grandsâŚmy kids turned out fine, and they played some of the âgoreyâ games! I also have an 11 year old that plays them as well!! Iâm not seeing the big dealâŚI sure wouldnât want my children sneaking anything!! Im thinking that is is not anything more than they would see on an action movie! If your children are understanding that this is a game, and it is not real life, Iâm thinking they will turn out just fine! This is just my opinion, and it worked for my littles!!
Why not try to give them Positive things to focus on⌠More Than Words by Rebecca Spooner is great and you can get it at rainbowresource.com
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Yeah weird everything you posted sounds like you wish there wasnât anything before you . Why would you mention his parents divorce
My 6 year oldâs favorite movies are
Pet Cemetery 2, Gremlins & Killer Klowns from outer Space
Wow uptight much! My son has been playing violent games since he was able to comprehend that itâs not real. He and his Dad play games all the time and we are avid horror film enthusiasts. My son watches them with us and has been since he was not scared anymore. You canât shelter them it only causes issues.
Ask yourself why it bothers you so much?I donât think counseling is needed.Theyre young and will forget about it unless you keep making a huge deal out of it
Explain to them itâs not real and itâs not ok to kill ppl?
I think youâre making a bigger deal than it is. If you donât want them to play the games than just ask the older one not to do it around them. You canât shelter your kids from everything all the time.
I think thatâs boys been boys. Yes silly but not worth blowing up over. Most kids will watch or hear from someone, councilling wonât be needed, plenty of kids with older siblings will have watched. My kids did at their dadâs when see him. Just explain its not appropriate for him to do it if dint want them to watch
I would guess The problem starts with you calling him, âthe half brotherâ. How do you think that child feels. No matter his age heâs still a child. And how do you know your other boys arenât asking their older brother to play and watch those things. Donât be so naive!!!
I was 4 when I started watching horror movies. IT was a staple in my house. I am completely fine it will blow over, your sheltering is why they are so intrigued. His parentâs divorce has absolutely nothing to do with this. Loosen up a bit about everything and your life wouldnât be so stressful
Counseling? Lol you are making such a big deal over nothing but boys being boys. You act like youâre kids are saints and are being FORCED to play these games and watch the movies lmfao Shoot my daughter even plays around like that with her dad. Iâm still trying to figure out what his ex wife cheating has to do with this
My kids donât watch gory shows or play violent games and they still play pretend with nerf/water guns. My oldest came home pretending to be a zombie. Kids play pretend and will learn things at school too. I wouldnât make this big of a deal about it. Next week theyâll probably be off playing something else. I would suggest a calm conversation with the teenager about what is not appropriate for young kidsâŚ.but I wouldnât make it a huge deal for the younger kids. The more you donât want them doing something, the more theyâre gonna do it. Kids are annoying like that sometimes.
Iâm sooo sure he goes in and wakes his little brothers up and forces them to watch horror movies and forces the controls in their little hands to play M games . (Mom of 4 boys)
I meanâŚ.my girls run around with toy guns and say pow pow. I played cowboys and indians as a kid and did the same things as them. Only thing i will say is my mom wouldnât let me watch stuff that she knew would give me nightmares but I would usually watch anyway. I dont see the need for counselingâŚ.
I would let them play but not in the middle of the night and have a chat about appropriate conversations at school My boys watch horror movies and have played some scary games we always talked about how it wasnât real and we donât talk about killing people on video games in school they also know their limits at home
omg like chill out lady. my kids 11 and 13 have been watching and playing games like that. and they are beautiful intelligent young ladies. none of that crap affected them
Counseling? Over video games and movies? Thatâs a bit much. Iâm glad to hear that theyâre bonding. Iâm glad your stepson loves his half sibling to be able to bond and grow memories with.
I think youâre the one that needs counseling.
Counseling over video games and movies. Ha! Thatâs laughable.
Sounds like the teens parents need to sit down and discuss age appropriate time and games with him for the younger siblings. If the kids are having behavioral issues because of it discuss that with him as well. He is almost an adult so treat him as such. That brotherly bond is definitely important and let him know that. It seems like he is just wanting to spend with them.
Lord if this was the only thing in my life to worry as a mother Iâd have it made. I grew up on horror movies. So did my kids and theyâve played violent games since they could pick up a controller. Itâs not big deal!!! Let them play and have fun. Donât throw them in counseling for absolutely no reason at all. Kids are kids and it takes us as parents to let them be just that,not thrown to a counselor to be told they are wrong to having fun.
I would be beyond furious! There would be Hell to pay!
Yeah I would not allow him to stay over anymore honestly until you get it figured out thatâs super dangerous ps not sure if your kids watch YouTube but we found some seriously disturbing videos on kids YouTube !! With parental settings in a kids protected app called huggy wuggy !!! He tells kids to kill their parents to kill them selves heâs purple and have sharp teeth in serious this stuff is scary I turned off all YouTube they also have been sneaking stuff into what seems like normal kids videos playing itâs so scary do not let you kids watch unless you are 100 percent able to supervise !!
Maybe you are the one in need of counseling
Just admit you hate your stepson
Being the fun big brother get a grip
I m on your side. By now all three kids need some counseling
Pick your battles girl!!! Seems like you donât care much for the âhalf brotherâ. My kids have half siblings and we just call them brother and sister
You sound like the problem to be honest. They are boys, let them be boys!!! My son is 6 and plays gta, cod, fortnite and never have I sheltered him from horror movies. And as a kid did you not play cops and robbers? Take a chill pill!
Oh my. Well, itâs tough to keep kids sheltered. Counseling is a good idea. I wonder if youâve considered a church group for your boys? Sometimes getting them involved in positive activities with positive people helps a lot. Theyâre going to be tempted in life to do weird things, but maybe if they get tools from counseling and a church group, they wonât be so vulnerable.
I say just take it as a learning moment. My six-year-old watches YouTube often and has watched some crazy stuff and has seen Pennywise on there and we took it as the opportunity to explain to him about imagination and that itâs not real in about make up and how people write stories and have used imagination to make these movies. Even prior to him watching anything on YouTube he would always played Nerf guns with his little brother and they would shoot each other and pretend like they were killing each other so I just say take it as a learning moment. Iâm sure that your stepson isnât coming over now because heâs thinking heâs going to be in trouble for what has happened. I mean as crazy as it is too I think that it was kind of sweet of him to include his brothers and want to be around his brothers because having a blended family is so hard
I didnât allow my son to play overly violent games at age 7 either. Mostly bc Iâve been to war & seen the real thing. Children donât need that.
If they need counseling over it, thereâs something missing.
Itâs our job to explain the difference between real & fantasy.
Boys will be boys. They like blood and gory stuff and fighting and killing, etc . I donât see a reason to be mad or for counseling but thatâs my opinion. To each their own
Mm I wouldnât like this, either. But stop looking to place blame on the ex⌠this happened under your roof & whatâs done is done. Iâd try to sit down as a family with your step son included & talk about rules & expectations in your home. Itâs okay if some people allow these types of games & movies & okay if you donât, especially with younger kids. Itâs okay to try to shield our kids & keep them innocent. Unfortunately older siblings sometimes interfere with that, that doesnât make him a bad kid. Iâd work on moving past it & try to put focus back on age appropriate things for your boys.
They are boysâŚthey will pick up a stick and pretend itâs a gun ⌠explain the difference and go on
Yes it may be disturbing but the brothers are being brothers. They are bonding. As well shame on you for speaking about your now husband ex wife.
I love evil within! Fun game!
Paranoid much??? Theyâre boys theyâre 6 and 7 theyâre not toddlers at this point if YOUâVE done YOUR job they know itâs not real itâs fake and the stepbrother is being all boy too I also saw the computer thing not your business what another mother does for her child youâre just pissed cuz she had your husband first so you take that out on the 15 year old and I doubt heâs afraid heâll get in trouble I bet youâve been like this since the day you married HIS dad and he knows you donât particularly care for him Iâd stay home too you need to pick your battles this isnât oneâŚ
Itâs not their half brother. Itâs their damn brother. Women like you piss me off with that. You need counseling.
My kids watch horror movies. Not that big a deal⌠Iâd think if they arenât saying bad words and not actually hurting anybody then they wouldnât need counseling⌠Let the boys bond⌠their older brother will be gone soon. Let them be boys⌠Playing video games is no reason for counseling⌠My kids have been through counseling when their dad died⌠Your just petty
I hardly ever comment on posts. But being a mom of 2 boys and a step mom of another boy. I gotta say you sound like you have some serious control issues. They are boys, hell I have a daughter who plays dead by daylight. and her favorite show is The walking Dead. You seriously need therapy
You just dont like the older childâŚ
Boys will be boys an it sound like they kicking it while you sleep. Iâll take that any day over being in the streets baby
Itâs interesting, I find it a little difficult to think that the teen is waking them up to force them to play. Our teens canât wait for our littles to go to bed so they can play.
Itâs appalling that the 17 yr old feels he can usurp your authority over the younger boys. Sure, he wants to be the cool big brother, but he doesnât get to make these parenting decisions. And waking the kids up affects their sleep and concentration at school.
I recommend speaking with the 17 year old about these issues. Heâs not the parent and doesnât get to make these decisions. Heâs old enough to make these choices for himself, but he has no jurisdiction over kids that are not his unless itâs an issue of physical safety. If he sees them about to do something dangerous, by all means he should stop them. But parents have the right to set bed times, appropriate entertainment, etc. The 17 yr old must respect this.
This is a stretch but you do realize that children in Ukraine are experiencing the stuff youâre complaining about them playing video games over IN REAL LIFE ? Be thankful we are not them & realize how petty you sound . This whole post screams âI resent my step son because he isnât mineâ . If theyâre not playing with their BROTHER they will find friends who have the games youâre so adamant about them not playing ⌠then it turns into a vicious cycle of sneaking and lying because youâre being a bit too harsh . Seek counseling if they hurt an animal or a kid ⌠not playing a video game . Jeez .
So youâre mad at kids being kids? You sound more childish than the children. What does the ex wifeâs infidelity have to do with anything? Why do the kids need counseling? Why are you so dramatic?
Kids are smart and know get and tv are pretend. My mom used to watch horror movies with us when we were under the age of 5, my good night songs were enter sandman, lake of Fire and other music. My daughter has also had the same , weâre all thriving and happy.
Maybe it is YOU who needs the counseling. You sound toxic, controlling and possibly jealous of the ex wife still.
You canât shelter kids forever, as far as counselling for video games? Lol, Honey your gonna have a hard time when actual real issues come up. Also, what does the ex wifeâs infidelity have to do with the issue at all? If I was your step son I wouldnât want to come over either.
Lord have mercy
My kids are 4 and 6 and love horror movies. 𤡠Its not a big deal.
Omg. Stop. I started playing halo and FPS games when I was around 5 or 6 with my big brother. I have never wanted to go out and kill someone. Iâm not violent. This is completely fine. Relax.
Lindsey ONeal
Whoa!
It is her husbandâs son. You donât not allow a child to come HOME, ever. What the actualâŚ?
Get counseling for you too maybe.
Why there marriage ended was honestly not needed. People can change. Usually donât lol but can. Heâs almost 18 the kids probably come around to hang with him and he may be watching it regardless at 17 heâs still a child and needs direction as well. My son who is 5 watches horror movies with his horror movie fan dad who is the brightest sweetest boy! And asked for a Chucky birthday cake although it was weird asking for it at the bakery I went ahead and got it because they have to be able to express themselves. He also knows all the super heros which we think is so cute when our kids are dressed up as Spiderman or Batman etc at Halloween but they KILL TOO.
You sound extra. I grew up watching horror movies with my dad and thatâs some of the best memories I have of him. A long as you teach them is not real I donât see the big deal. My kids grew up watching horror films as well and they turned out fine.
A - heâs not welcome over . Taking toys away isnât going to fixe thing itâs talking to them whatâs appropriate and what isnât you are in charge you step on them
Umm, 6 & 7 year olds need to sleep at night, for their health and brain development. Besides the issue of what heâs been showing them, itâs not at all okay, or normal, that heâs waking them up in the middle of night, for hours it sounds like, to watch movies and play games, clearly knowing itâs wrong, which is why heâs been sneaky about it. Sounds like youâll be better off that he is refusing to visit. They donât need counseling, they need to find something else to play. Shut off cable and internet when you go to bed, and take all remotes and controllers with you
Parental control on all electronic devices and at his age âŚ.he knows better and should have adult supervision when he comes over to visit and no spending nights! Tough loveâŚneeds to start somewhere!!
My 5 year old plays call of duty he knows the difference between real and pretend maybe go over that with the younger boys and make sure they know the differenceâŚ
What beautiful memories they are making, ehy be upset ? I watched my first scary movie with my older sister and Iâll never forget it
Your kids will be fine. They arenât going to become murderers. Right now theyâre probably only doing it because youâve made it so taboo & dramatic honestly. & Theyâre enjoying the reaction. You can still choose not to allow it in your home but the bigger deal you make of it, the worse itâs going to be. Also your stepson is more than old enough to watch that stuff, and he probably just thought he was being the cool older brother. Not sure why youâre expecting to hear anything sexual, or get them counseling, both are a bit extreme if you ask me.
Im a gamer mom and hubby gamer my kid shes 6 cod and world of warcraft elder ring we play shea fine she understands its fixtion and. Just a game she just finished final fantasy 7 remake part 1 hell her name comes from world of warcraft Alleria⌠Lady they dont need counseling just a conversation about how its not real and fictional and make sure they get whats real and fake
No matter how many negative comments you get, you are their mother. If you are uncomfortable with your younger children being exposed to those types of games then you need to have a family meeting. Setting the ground rules and what is and isnât acceptable.
The fact that heâs waking them up, keeping them up, and disturbing their sleep on a school night would be a big issue for me.
If after several heart to hearts and family meetings, and they conti ue
, Iâd kick the gaming system out of my house.
I feel so bad for the older kid. The moment you referred to him as only their half brother and went into details about the mom, youâre clearly bitter. No wonder he doesnât wanna go over. I wouldnât want a stepmom as controlling as this either.
You sound bitter asf. They should all respect the littles bed timeâŚbut you should be grateful the older brother loves his little ones and includes them.
Dead ass you sound like the bitter new wife whos jealous of anything their husband had in the past
Yeah I donât think a 17 year old is waking up young kids to go into his room and play
Video games all night⌠the teen would want them out of his room⌠my mom has always been a Stephen King/horror fan and I grew up with it and so do did my kids⌠I think itâs you who might need the counsellingâŚ
Oh heaven forbid. But they are boys you cant protect them from all things gore. I think you going over board with therapy and counseling. I feel youâre also trying to erase their imagination.
Sheltering them from those things and not teaching them that itâs fake is what makes this wrong and also pushing them into therapy for it when they are doing nothing wrong or put of the ordinary. By trying to prevent something you will cause something