You are not crazy and I would definitely not let him take her anywhere. He has proven he doesn’t care and for her safety and doesn’t care and hasn’t earned anything. Yeah no. If it becomes and issue take it to court. If you haven’t been writing it down right down dates times document everything he has done been doing. Have records for the court. I would try and get full custody. Don’t let him take her anywhere. Especially a cruise. He sounds sketchy and Dangerous. And for the safety of your daughter I would not agree to him taking her anywhere.
You aren’t crazy, you’d be crazy to let her go. He probably tryna use this cruise as a way to show boat like he’s father of the year
Nope, I wouldn’t let her go with him!
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I would go see lawyer for consultation to see what your rights are and his as parents.If nothing is in place with court it’s time to start putting it in writing. Then I would tell the other parent after you have signed your documents to file to court. Unless you can discuss things on phone and email each other appropriately putting feelings aside in this situation. This can be done fast with one lawyer if you are same page as parents if not you will need a lawyer.
Good Luck proving if you have no witnesses or talked to lawyer. Please talk to lawyer in consultation.
Honestly it’s very emotional for both parties.
Remember to look after yourself 
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No you are not crazy there is no way I would let her go with him. He is not responsible enough .
No, he is not responsible enough.
Anyone can be a father, but it takes a lot to be a dad.
If it’s as cut and dry as you’ve said, he’s basically a stranger. Would you let a stranger take her?
I wouldn’t let her go
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There’s no way in hell I’d let him take her on a cruise.
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See a lawyer but don’t let that little girl out of your arms without a legal battle
I’m sorry but no way chance in hell going away with him if this was my situation my daughter never spent nights with her dad
Imagine complaining about not receiving child support when you didn’t put any effort into collecting it 
What’s funnier is having a man that actually attempts (even if it’s the bare minimum) to be apart of his child’s life and the mother just doesn’t appreciate his efforts 
That man should just walk completely away cause nothing he says or does will ever make you happy. Heal that hurt love bug
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Lmaoooo he isn’t taking her anywhere!
Sorry but if it were me that would be a BIG HELL to the NOO
No fucken way do you let your daughter go with him. xx
Much love to you and your family
Don’t let her go with him anymore. If he cares he will take u to court for visitation and pay child support.
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Nope. Nope. Does he have any custody over her? If not I’d say no. And don’t let her go with him anymore. Father of the year. Only shows up when it benifits him or suits him.
No way bio dad ain’t told her he’s her dad on the visits he does or calls, who’s the holiday with then ? Or do u call him uncle 
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You aren’t crazy. He doesn’t get that privilege unless he can prove he deserves it, TOO HIS DAUGHTER. Otherwise he is SOL.
No way would I let him take her
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Who does she think he is if she doesn’t know he’s dad?
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She’s 7 years old and has been semi in her life for 2 years?? Oh good lort…do not let that little girl go on a cruise with him. He lost her once you said…he’s definitely not capable of keeping her safe, especially on a cruise in the middle of the damn ocean. No no no no no no no no.
Hope you are keeping a journal that your child never finds‼️
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Who does she think this Rando is picking her up?
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No way not in this lifetime - you are certainly not crazy but he sure as hell is! No way should you say yes to this xx
No way, you’ll end up with a dead child.
no no no, wouldn’t let him take her anywhere far off
I wouldn’t even entertain the idea, shut it down now so he doesn’t ask again.
That would be a no and if he wanted to fight about it he could take me to court
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Absolutely not he is irresponsible child welfare comes first
I’m all about children seeing their dad. In the long run you will have less problems with your daughter. She will never blame you for not letting her see him. It sounds like you have done a very good job preparing her when she is away from you.
But no on the cruise! It would take too long and probably too far away for you to get to her and clean up any mess. Tell him to come up with closer vacation. Or you go with them because of his past problems.
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Alone on a great big ship! Not my kid!
Out if the question. Firm no.
She calls your now husband Dad… so when she goes with her bio Dad, who does she think this person is if you haven’t told her? You ard not wrong for not wanting to let her go. If he showed more responsibility then yes but I would tell him no. If he can’t be responsible enough to show up for her then he shouldn’t be allowed to take her.
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I’m also all about parents being able to see their kid but this is a big nope. Maybe if between now and then if he steps up and shows that he can be responsible you can agree to some days here and there. But if he won’t even pick her up for overnight then I wouldn’t trust her alone with him on a cruise.
He has some nerve!!! Nope!
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He wouldn’t take my child
That’s a no from me. I’m sorry to say that the chances of your child dying are way to high. I wouldnt even entertain the thought
Really?I think you answered your own question…
nope, you have every right , same situation in my 10 and 16 yr olds life…The love him as a dad but its whatever to them if he shows up or not …Stand your ground!
I’m all for fathers rights
However for her benefit this needs to be built up
Unless he can be on time consistently, increase his time with her gradually to over nights , and then eventually for a week in holidays and things then I would say no
As long as you leave the opportunity open for him to change your doing everything u can for their relationship
Money is a completely different issue. I agree all parents should pay maintenance however I don’t think it should come into the situation when discussing contact as it’s a separate issue xx
I wouldn’t let her go with him for a week. You never know what’s going to happen especially with the fact he has never had her for more than a day.
My opinion…YOURE OUT of your MIND even asking or considering letting the child go with a biological stranger
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No, think about her she would be so confused by being with him but really not knowing him…
You are crazy, but not for the cruise. Not telling your child about who her real dad is is just extra trauma on top of a shitty dad you need to tell her before she grows up mad at you for lying. My mom lied about my dad, and if she were still alive I wouldn’t be talking to her. There’s groups full of people like me. You need to tell her.
Nope definitely not.
100% NO GO on that one. Be the bad guy, if ain’t happening.
That doesn’t sound good… sorry, but NOPE. He really needs to prove himself first.
I’m confused, the beginning of your post says she calls your husband dad and doesn’t know he’s not actually her biological dad so when she goes with her biological dad who does she think he is? Lol
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Yeah that would be a big NOPE ! You’re not out of Your mind !
I would NEVER let her go. Unless she’s perhaps close with his family? If they’re going to be there and can watch her that’s one thing but my kid would be staying with me
You’re crazy I wouldn’t allow her to go !! No way
On a boat where there’s water and he lost her before?? Not a fucking hope in hell my god no way … and by the sounds of u u said no long before posting this … stick to no a part time father is no father in some cases
You’re not crazy… Leave it up to her. She’ll see it one day and It will crush her and she’ll have issues but you can’t keep them apart. Maybe they’ll bond on the trip and he will get her more.
He’s definitely not taking my kid if I was you. I don’t blame you on that part at all. I would be honest with her about her biological dad tho & tell her the truth while she’s still young because as she gets older she will eventually find out & you don’t want it to be from someone else. She’ll feel betrayed & it could end up causing issues between you guys. Just be honest in the best way you can for a 7 year old.
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NTA. Definitely would say no
On a cruise, I’d be scared something would happen to her and she would never come back home alive again. Sorry, but, I don’t trust that man to be a good and loving dad.
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Don’t let him take her
Tell him if he wants to do big trips like that with her he needs to prove he can do the little things that are the bare minimum first like SHOWING UP ON TIME and ohhh I dunno maybe NOT LOSING YOUR CHILD
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First, they will not let him on the ship if he owes child support…
Second, I wouldn’t trust him with my child…
Third, why doesn’t he give you the money he would be spending on her ticket and you use that money for whatever she wants or needs?..
Fourth, fuck him.
He can only take her if you sign for a passport. Both parents have to sign! Don’t sign!
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I’m confused, if she doesn’t know she has a different biological dad then who does she think this man is that she’s spending time with? Or have I misread this 
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Hell no. Even if he was active in her life, I’d still be saying no. That’s so scary to even think about.
Um, if he can afford Christmas cruise why can’t he pay suppor?
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Personally, no way that would happen on my watch. He’d have to fight me for it. Does he have a legal visitation schedule? And child support? How is he not paying that?
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Definitely not okay to allow for a week. He has to earn his trust not just with you but also her. He’s a stranger.
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Hell to the no. He can’t be trusted.
I’d be nervous about it
You’re not crazy. Mother intuition is never wrong. I totally agree with u in that u shouldn’t let her go!
#betterSAFEthanSORRY
I don’t know. I’ve learned that when someone tells you a story, there’s always two sides and people tend to embellish their side. I’m not saying that’s the case here, but we only hear your side. If everything you say is in fact the full story then I would agree that he’s not mature enough to take your daughter on a cruise! However, your daughter seems to think he’s someone important otherwise why is she calling him and asking him to pick her up and things. She probably knows he’s her dad because children are way smarter than we give them credit and who knows what he’s told her when you aren’t around!
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I wouldn’t let her go. I’m in the same situation with my oldest 2s dad 1 time that he did get them him and his woman at the time wanted to take them back to Florida with them and i said hell no. He doesn’t call them or see them or pay any child support for them. I would tell him that if he does want to take her for a week or so then he’s going have to not only earn your trust back but he also has to show up when he says he’s going to and do what he’s supposed to.
You are not crazy at all and I don’t know why you put up with it this long consistency is key when it comes to being a parent!
I would tell him to prove he can be consistent and prove he wants to be in her life by calling her 3 times a week showing up on time for visitations and by earning the right to overnights then he has to prove he can properly take care of her. He has 10 months to prove he can step up along with paying child support monthly. If you set these conditions down and he does not follow through then she does not go. If you like my idea get it put in writing signed by both you and the father and keep a logbook where you keep track of calls and visitations and child support received, which you should have done all along (the log book). If you keep track of lack of contact you can get all of his parental rights removed easier.
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I would NEVER let him take her on a cruise… If he’s flakey why would you consider letting her go?
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Nope she would not go.
Hell no! However, you need to be honest with her your daughter about her dad. The longer you wait the more difficult it gets and it’s gonna mess her up if you wait untilshe’s older to tell her. It’s not a bad thing to have a different biological dad, it’s quite normal but the shock of it can cause a lot of trauma in the future. Let your girl know.
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No way would I let my ex husband take my son for a week especially on a cruise! Protect your child!
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Nope! Unless he is in a relationship he’s probably just thinking of using her for a chick (stupid chick) magnet. Also, do you really trust him? Really?
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i would not be letting my child go on a cruise, and honestly if it was me it would be supervised visitation at best, you earn the right to have that time by being respsonsible and trustworthy and work up to the other stuff… i am sorry you have dealt with so much thats awful. please take care.
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You are not crazy ! He is! She would absolutely NOT be going on a cruise . If he really wants to step up, start small.
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Doesn’t pay child support but is going on a cruse. Those don’t come cheap
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That would be a resounding NO for me!!
First of all, being on a cruise ship right now with Covid/Omnicron being rampant is not a prudent thing for an adult to do let alone a child.
Second of all, as others have said he needs to prove himself trustworthy to care for the child on a consistent basis. 6 hours in one day is a lot different than being on a ship for a week 24-7.
Best of luck to you and your daughter.
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She is to young yet. don’t bring it up unless he shows up. Only keep information about him if it is a medical emergence.
If she doesn’t know he is her bio father why does she interact with him? What is the reason she “visits” him and not other random adults?
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No way. Unless he pays for you, your husband and child to go on the cruise too. He would probably forget all about her as soon as they were on the cruise. Would she get fed? Would someone abuse her? Too many questions.
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I would not be letting my child near him! Supervised visits at the least.
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If she doesn’t know he’s her biological dad, who does she think he is?
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I wouldn’t send her in the first place. He would lose her when they went to shore! I’m confused how you explain who he is and why she needs to go with him for their visits. My niece found out at that age that he step father wasn’t her biological dad and she still has issues in her low 20s.
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Never. Lucky he brings her back now. Go to court for full custody. Dates, times, lost her. No responsibility. Scary
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Who does she think he is??
So if she doesnt even know your husband is not her bio dad………who does she think this man she spends a little time with is?!?! Im confused. 
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Well I wouldn’t like it either but if it’s court order visitation then you probably have no say in our state all the other parent has to do is send a written itinerary showing when and where they will be at certain days and times and if it’s not during a scheduled visit then they can make a written request to the j7dge to be approved for the extra visitation times we had to do this every summer to be able to take my husband’s son on vacations with us so I would try to compromise because if he is serious about it he can and mist likely will be granted permission
You should definitely not let her go and honestly take him back to court and get his visits revoked. Children don’t need that inconsistency in their lives.
I did this ( my ex was there from 3 months old, only dad he knew). My son found out at 8 when my ex decided to scream at him in a middle of our argument to go find his real father in prison because he wasn’t his real child.
I wish I would of told my son from the beginning. The pain and the hurt he went through hearing that, trying to understand why. I wish upon no child. He was torn apart. He is now 14, he has met his real dad once. He wants nothing to do with him.
I didn’t do it because he was flakey, he legit was not going to be around ever. In and out of prison, got addicted to multiple drugs. He wanted to chase the party life and not be a dad.
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Young one - no - do not let her go. You are right. Stick to your “Momma feelers” or “gut feeling “. He must be crazy - his accountability and responsibility is askew- once she is outside our country - who knows what could happen.
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yeah nope wouldnt happen with me
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Sounds like a plan to kidnap her don’t let her go with him.
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Who does she think this man is if she doesn’t know hes her biological father?
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Hell no don’t let her go
Especially if she doesn’t know him well
And if anything happen it would be your fault for letting her go knowing that you cannot trust this man
Your child’s life is in your hands 24/7
this man abandon you guys and now you’re willing to put your child’s life in his for a week girl come on …
My ex and I have court ordered visitation for our daughter that we have together .one year she was supposed to go visit him for the summer in Texas as she usually does. I usually don’t have a problem but this particular year he had his brother move in with him and his brother has a domestic violence record. Domestic violence is the reason my ex and I are no longer together. he was very abusive .we were very abusive with each other and I decided not to ever let that in my life again or hers. so when I found out that his brother moved in with him I did not allow my daughter to go visit him that year until his brother was moved out of the house. It scared me to let her go because I know how they are . I know how abusive they can get and I will be damned if I let my daughter be anywhere near that shit. All I needed was my daughter to back mouth one time and then this guy go and slap her because I would have lost my shit.
Her dad was very pissed off and called me names and did what he could to try to hurt my feelings… but I don’t give a shit it was my decision to not let my daughter go I would have not been able to live with the guilt if something were to have happened to her and I knew that I shouldn’t of sent her because of that situation…
if he really wanted he could have taken me to court but he didn’t. Because he knew.
And I would sit down and have a talk with her about who this man really is and what the situation is . it’s not cool to go through life not knowing who you are or where you come from even if one parent is absent she has a right to know for herself. Better her grow up knowing than being confused about it.
She may seem too young seven is a young age but believe me they understand a lot more than we give them credit for.
Your right. Do not even entertain it with him.
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I wouldn’t let her go with him. Kidnap plan, forget about her or abuse her.
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