Clearly your mom and dad have both checked out of the relationship.
Emeshment is so damaging for children. Please find a therapist
Mind your own business. Let ur mom and dad handle it.
Your feelings are valid, however, it’s her business.
Sometimes you gotta distance yourself and that is ok.
Stay out of “grown folks” business 
What your mom does isn’t really any of your business
Not your business! That is all
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So sorry that your going through this, toms of emotions. Hope it gets better 
That’s between ur parents. Not u or ur sister. Let them be
The best advice I can give is that their marriage is not your responsibility.
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Just stay away from her and go hang out with your dad
Yeah you sound like your not minding your own business.
Stay outta their marriage for a start!
It’s none of your business.
Advice: stay out of it.
Just don’t assume, ask for facts. Just be careful what you wish for as I am brutally honest with my kids…
They may have an open relationship 
SIMPLE MIND YOUR BUSINESS. And your dad needs to leave
Your mom is a person too, she doesn’t want to be in a loveless relationship or marriage… Now of course there are right ways and wrong ways to do things. It’s possible your dad knows what’s going on… They are adults and can handle their own relationship…
Others are not our business.
Your parents are adults. You are an adult. If your parents are unhappy, wish them happiness. If that means they get divorced, so be it. It is so much more important to be happy, to be kind, to find love where you can than it is for your mom to do what you think she should. She is clearly unhappy. Support happiness. Be kind. Love your mom. Not just when she does what you want her to. All the time.
From the husband’s point of view. I wouldn’t care if my wife was cheating on me. I expect she is.
I’m sure your dad is aware of all this let him handle it in his own way
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From a personal experience in my life, I would honestly isolate myself or avoid all contact with her. Yea it may not be “your place” as some have stated, but you have a right to be angry! They’re your parents& it can be hurtful watching one parent give all effort towards the other& them still continuing to choose to do so! Cheating does NOT only effect the couple, it effects the whole family! My dad was hurt because he truly loved my mother when they were together. Since then he’s dated 2 people, his last gf died while he was staying the weekend with her& he hasn’t dated since! He’s the one who found her& I honestly think it broke his heart. I was on vacation& I was over 12hrs away when he called me crying. I’ve only seen/heard my dad cry once or twice in my life, you know being a man it’s a sign of weakness to cry! But when he asked me if I could be back by that following Saturday for her funeral I made arrangements to come back& be there for my dad because he said “I don’t think I could go without you or your brother being there for me!” My dads always been there for me through some really shitty/tough situations& it was the least I could do to be there for him when he needed someone to lean on!
You should probably mind your own relationship and not your parents marriage. Your dad knows whats going on. He chooses to stay anyway. Dont rub it in his face
Damn someone comes on here for advice and now mostly everyone is judging her but telling her to quit judging her mom. Most don’t even hear what they say now days. Makes no damn sense. Young lady try to have a non judgmental conversation with ur mom and then ur dad only expressing how what they have going on is now affecting u and ur sibling as well and what could yall possibly to do to help the situation before it leads to separation or if that is the final conclusion to help get everyone to a peaceful state so everyone can comfortably co exist.
Damn y’all are nosey but it’s ya parents I get it…but still mind your own and keep it pushing. Regardless of what happens they’ll still be in your life.big hugs I understand it hurts alot
You can feel how ever you feel about it. But it isnt your fight. Your parents marriage is their deal, not yours. They are aduts, they will figure it out. just make sure you & yours are taken care of. The rest will play its self out!!! Good Luck tho!!!
Flip the script. How would you want your parents to treat your marriage? Constantly being involved and butting in, or adding unsolicited advice? We don’t know what happens behind closed doors. Leave their marriage alone.
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You really should mind your own business. Your mother’s love for you doesn’t change if she’s seeing someone else and that is all that truly matters. You are her child no matter what age you get to you will always be her child so respect her, and her privacy, she gave you life after all.
I know you and your sister are hurting. I wish people would honor their vows but sadly, couples outgrow each other and move on. I agree with mostly everyone here saying that you need to stay out of their marriage troubles. The best thing I can tell you is to just take care of yourself and your sister. If your parents at some point try to get you involved, tell them to seek marriage counseling and to leave you and your sister out of it. Good luck!
Here’s the thing…you’re dad was TOLD she was having an affair, right? So he knows what is going on. Known your place, sweetie. It is not in someone else’s marriage. ESPECIALLY if y’all have already informed the other party of what has been going on. Does not matter that it is your parents. You have NO idea what is going on behind closed doors.
Mind your own business. He may already know. They may have decided to stay together but have an open marriage. There are so many variables. Let them figure this out.
I mean she asked for a divorce because she’s not happy, I’m sure she has her reasons for that. Your dad won’t divorce her, if anything you should be mad at him for not letting her move on after asking for a divorce.
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Personally my parents business is their business. Clearly your father knows and isn’t doing anything about it. You shouldn’t pressure either of your parents to do something they don’t want to do. If they’re content with the way things are then leave them be. They’re adults they can figure it all out when they’re ready to figure it out. Just do your best to not be like them.
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It’s there business don’t ever get involved because you don’t know everything that’s happening you should never take a side when it comes to your parents it has nothing to do with the love they have for you so mind your own business an let them deal with their own issues
It’s a sad situation, but it’s theirs. I’d stay out of it, things usually backfire and they end up angry at you. Your mom should not have involved your sister by cheating in front of her. Whatever you do, good luck.
It’s a sad situation but I’d stay out of it. Parents are human and make bad choices too. Plus it’s none of your business 
I say you’re an adult and should stay out of your mothers business!!! You OBVIOUSLY are very biased against her and in favor of your father… I’m SURE there are many issues between them that aren’t all your mothers fault (as clearly you feel your father is faultless). How about instead of breaking her down you build him up to divorce her? Your negativity and feeding into this is not going to help. Focus on you and your family and let them do them.
Do you live with them? Mind your own business IMO.
Yuck. This mindset of “it’s your mother” needs to stop. Toxic is toxic. Period. IDGAF who you are. Too many people let too much slide because someone is “family”. 
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I just want to know what “visiting with my girls” means? Do the OP children live with their grandparents and she gets visitation? If so she may want to mind her business so she can continue seeing her kids
Just let them be, you worry about your own life. That’s it. Simple. You’re not responsible for their choices they make.
Disengage. It’s pretty inappropriate for y’all to know so much and be so involved in your parents’ marital issues, even if you’re adults. That’s just not how parent-child relationships are supposed to go. Fair if you want to distance yourself from your mom because I wouldn’t like it if my mom was behaving this way either. But there’s nothing you can do about issues in their relationship. All you’ll accomplish is causing more stress for yourself.
My mom was doing same things I stayed outta it but I now don’t talk to my mother been a nice an peaceful 3 years
Until you’ve been in a decades long unhappy relationship like this, don’t be so quick to judge. They held it together for a long time for their own reasons (likely for you and your siblings benefit, however misguided) and it’s truly their business at this point. Definitely talk to your mom and tell her how you’re feeling though because communication will always be better than passive aggressive behavior. Try to empathize with her as a woman. Unhappy marriages feel like they drain the life and soul out of you. You lose yourself in the unhappiness. It’s suffocating and all consuming. Should she have handled it better? Absolutely.
Your mom is grown. Kids grown or not have no place in adults business. You don’t know all of what’s going on. Simply put mind your business. Parent or not
Tell your dad and leave it alone. If you don’t like your mom so much then stop going around her. Not your circus, not your monkeys
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Stay in your muthafuggin lane. Dad is obviously aware and had been for sometime. It’s not any of your business what your grown parents do. Would you like your mom or dad doing the same kind if things to you? They’re adults. You don’t know nor should you know their personal business.
Actually your grown and it’s none of your business. Sorry but if your Mom is that unhappy then, she is doing what makes her happy. She will suffer the consequences of her actions. But still none of your business because it’s her life. I know we think we lay claim to our parents but they are individual people with thoughts and feelings, just like us. Like I said you can’t hide things like that forever and it will come out eventually.
Some of you need to fall back your damn selves and take your own advice. This comment section is pathetic.
Honestly it’s none of your business. Whatever goes on between a mother and father is completely separate from the kids. You can be mad all you want but it’s not up to you to handle it. You can’t fix a dying marriage only the spouses can do that and it sounds like they don’t want to. Your mom wants a divorce and has no intention of working it out. She’s ready to move on and your dad isn’t letting her, so she’s doing it herself. If you want to be mad at anyone, be mad at your dad. He’s the one preventing her from going and living her life how she wants to. He’s preventing her from doing what will truly make her happy and that’s pretty selfish on his part. But there’s not a damn thing you can do because it’s not your place
I must say I appreciate the GROWN folks in these comments telling this girl to stay out of it.
That its none of her business.
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Your dad likely already knows and doesn’t want to deal with it.
It’s not really for you to handle as they are both your parents .
Personally this is between your mom an dad. Not you, your sister n dad. I would butt out n mind my own business.
Tbh the relationship between them is over. They know what is going on. They are probably just staying together until all of the kids are grown. It sucks yes but just love them and let them handle it
Simply none of your business
You need to stay tf out of their business.
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My advice mind your business 
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I have. The only advice I can give you is to stay out of it. There’s always 3 sides and the more involved you get, the harder it is to get over it
Mind ya business, that’s between her and her husband
To many people involve themselves in others business stop the attitude it’s not your business
Not your business. Let them get on with their own business themselves.
It is best that you stay out of it. I caught my mom on a few occasions having affairs in my parents bed. She is a monogamous cheater. She has never been faithful to any man she was with including my bio father. I found out recently that my dad (person who raised me) was having affairs as well. Everyone thought he was joking when he would introduce his girlfriends to us kids. He wasn’t joking. It changed everyone’s view in the family. He knew she couldn’t stay faithful but pretended for everyone else that their marriage was monogamous. You don’t know their marriage or their arrangement. That whole situation was devastating because I was lied to repeatedly instead of them just being honest about the status of their relationship. I prefer to have open or poly relationships. My kids know. They are cool with it. Maybe they don’t want you or your sister to know because of how you two have reacted already!
Definitely the actions of a cheater!!
I vote on you minding your business…
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People are telling this person to mind their business but fail to realize how psychologically damaging stuff like this is to someone.
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It’s perfectly acceptable for you to feel that way, but please do realize… Your mother is an adult and only human just like the rest of us. Maybe she’s unhappy and trying to find her happiness again. I’m not condoning it, just… I think you should let them handle that, themselves.
It sucks but they are adults 
they sleep separate and aren’t acting as a couple in love she’s mentioned she wanted a divorce and told him about the cheating sounds like they are fine with their situation probably can’t afford a divorce or to live separate and just doing what they have to to survive id stay out of their sex life and love them for who they are honestly
I dont see what getn in the middle of it is doing for you or them it’s not gunna help anything and forcing them out of the current living situation and or marriage probably isn’t an option I. There first place hints why they are living they way they are life is to expensive to leave a dead relationship I kno this because I am living with my sons father currently its honestly like having two children he helps in no way besides the rent and he sleeps in the living room although we aren’t seeing other people we aren’t together. We were never married but we are tryn to keep a roof over our sons head and nothing else matters besides payn the bills and taking care of my son
How is it so hard to keep your nose our of other people’s business? Shes grown and so are you. They can work it out WITHOUT your ‘help’ and the fact you treat her differently because of her personal choices is the most selfish crap I’ve ever heard.
All due respect, but their relationship isn’t any of your business. It’s between them. They knew each other well before you were even around. Show respect and support your parents. Or don’t. It’s not really up to you. Just love them. Deal with your own life. Learn and apply what you want. Or don’t. The only person you’re responsible for is you and how you deal with things you personally can control in your own life. Hope it works out for them and you and can find the balance for you to deal with it. Learning this is what helped me.
My moms now ex husband was cheating while planning the wedding she didn’t find out til after she married him. She stayed they did counseling but once again he cheated I tried to tell her and she still stayed
Stay out of it. It’s your dad and hers marriage. I sounds like he knows what’s going on, he’s an adult and can handle it just be there for him when he asks. If you have a good mother daughter relationship with your mom then keep it just don’t interfere in their marriage
First of all… even though they are your parents and you have your own moral code… don’t apply that to your parents.
You do not know everything that happens between them. Even if they claim to ‘tell you everything’
Move out if you haven’t . This is toxic and not really your problem . Stay out .
This is wild. While she is your mother. Did you read what you wrote? I assume your dad is a big boy who can manage his wife and obviously whatever is going on. Maybe step back and stop stalking her! Good grief. While I don’t condone her behavior. It’s also not worth taking tylenol for someone else’s pain. I think you have far more important things to worry about then getting involved in their marriage and trying to out your mom. Grow up!
Stay out of it. My mom always said stay out of other people’s marriages, even your own parents
I bet your parents are poly and y’all just annoying af meddling in their business 
Your are justified in feeling like you do. Guaranteed you don’t know the entire story. I know it’s hard but try as hard as you can to love your mother for the mother she has been to you and not the wife she has been to your father. Concentrate on your marriage and not your parents marriage.
Honestly I don’t agree with most of these comments. If I know someone is cheating guess what IM TELLING. Why? Cause I’ve been there it freaking hurts . parents , friends , idc who it is I’m telling. You obviously care & that’s why you’re telling and that’s okay. If my mom was to cheat or my dad on my step parents guess what IMMA BE MAD ASF and I’m telling cause they are grown enough to walk away. No sense in cheating and staying if you’re not happy. And plus I’m nosey 
so I would of done the same thing. Your opinion MATTERS. No matter how many people in these comments say different. You’re obligated to have feelings about this situation cause it affects you too.
Ya even if you tell what’s going on. You be to blame. Krama. Sit back and wait. Does dad know? Dad better check finances. Bank. Bills. She could be buying stuff. Ranking up changes. Some leave once no more money is around. Everything maxed out. Wishing you luck
Maybe your daddy has a boyfriend on the side too and just wants to keep his cover so leave it alone before you end up then licking the shit from the spoon you use to stir the pot with
I mean… what do you expect? She literally said she wants a divorce and they sleep in separate bedrooms lol.
Your Dad sounds like he doesn’t really care so…
All im saying is has your dad always been faithful? Is there more problems then you know?
It’s not the children’s business, no matter HOW old they are… Butt Out…
Let the grown ass woman live her life . Your not there parents your the kid , she can decide what she wants to do. And so can your dad.
Just stay out of it. They are both aware of the situation. And they are both choosing to ignore it so I think you should as well.
Is answering her calls as Hello Floozie out of the question?
You and your sister need to Mind your OWN business.
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Mind your own business! For all you know your dad knows and approves.
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Stay out of their marriage
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Love both of them. Is my best advice.
Bring it up to her. Confront her and tell her she is being a whore and taking advantage of your father. I would. 
. And I prob would say it all in front of my father. And vice versa if it was my dad doing it to my mom.
If she isn’t happy why she sticking around.
Be there for your Dad and ignore tf outta your Mom. Cheating is gross.
None of your damn business. Not your marriage
You need to let them work it out PERIOD.
You need to mind your own business. Your parents or not that’s between them and literally no one else. If you told your father and he chooses to stay that’s his choice. Your mother said she wanted a divorce and your dad never gave her one, I would cheat on him too. Fuck you and fuck your dad.
Sit them both down! And tell them how you feel! Tell them everything!
Stay out of it. Period.
Show proof to your father about your father cheating and tell your mother she’s a bad representative of good healthy relationships. Your father should know he’s a sucker paying all the bills while she cheats. They both need to move on.