I'm being accused of cheating

Me and my now fiancé of 4 years got into a fight last night. He always accuses me of cheating on him and it’s to the point where I feel it’s his guilty conscience coming out. I asked him for the first time last night to give me his phone because I want to go through it and he can go through mine if he feels I’m cheating. Keep in mind we have been together for 4 years, engaged, have a 2 year old and I’m currently pregnant. I have never given him a reason to think I’m cheating and I’m fed up with being accused of it. When I was going through his phone I found 2 photos there were sent to him a year ago that he saved on snap chat, they were tit pictures. I keep looking and found 5 other pair of tits that he had saved to his phone from before we started dating (all different girls) I also found a photo that he took of me when I was drunk and passed out on his bed that he took before we started dating. I don’t know how to feel about any of this and I just need to make sure I’m not overreacting. When I started finding all of this stuff he started to yell at me and tell me to “give him his F**king phone now” and yanked it from my hand.
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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. I'm being accused of cheating

I would be more concerned with the picture of you, drunk and passed out. I don’t even do that to my best friend of 23 years

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He’s the cheater and the guilt is why he is saying that you are cheating. I’ve been there, not worth staying. It is very disrespectful to you that he is accusing you of something so serious. Trust me, be done. No need for stress like that in your life, especially while pregnant. Good luck. It’s been 11 years since I left mine. We were together 14 years. I stayed about 12 years too long.

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That’s called a narcissist. RUNNNN

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Get out. Not only a cheater but he’s a pretitor. He took a picture without you knowing. Who knows what else he has done or is capable of. You may not be the first or last

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He is cheating Been through this b4 My ex use to accuse me of cheating which I never did but in the end it was him tht was cheating

He doesn’t trust you and now you know you can’t trust him…. At this point why even bother with this relationship. He hasn’t apologized for the crap he’s pulling do you think he’s going to do the work to restore your trust in him?

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I think you have some red flags here…

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Yeah thats are a hard no for me. My now husband and i almost divorce over him watching porn all the time… Hunny he showing you who he is. My hubby tried blaming me for his actions and when i was packing to walk away he changed his ways for the most part. Life is somewhat cool

The accuser is usually the abuser.

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First. Delete the pic of you immediately.
Second. Leave him, he is a pig like most men. Smh

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No question in my mind…

Girl leave now! It’s only going to get worse and you’re going to be miserable. I am talking from a lifetime of experience I’m 54 and one single for 12 years because of crazy s*** like that. Especially the one with you sleeping when you were drunk that would really creep me out! I think your gut is telling you what to do you just think you can change him and you can’t

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That’s so wrong that he’s saved all those pictures, especially the one of you. Do not marry this man!!

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And the person cheating is always the accuser past experience on that as well!

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If you’re in a position you feel the need to look though someone’s getting phone, leave. No one wants to live like that

You have your answer…

If you have to look through his phone then that’s a red flag

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Cheaters always accuse their partner

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I would make a point to make him delete that pic of you. He could also use that at a later date if you all split to prove you unfit. Unless the court took in the date as a old pic. I would be making some plans!!

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:triangular_flag_on_post::triangular_flag_on_post::triangular_flag_on_post::triangular_flag_on_post::triangular_flag_on_post:
This story makes him sound predatorish.

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I was always accused only to cover his iwn durty tracks,bin him

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O my! God love ya. Prayers for you.

Red flag toxic. Think hard and remember kids don’t thrive just having parents together. They need to be happy together.

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Gut feelings mama. You know the answer already in your heart. :purple_heart:

He’s cheating Hun sorry :pensive:

It’s hard thinking about being a single mom, but it’s so much better in the end. You deserve better.

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The trust is gone. Move on. :triangular_flag_on_post::triangular_flag_on_post::triangular_flag_on_post::triangular_flag_on_post:

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The accuser is the abuser.

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I’m sorry… did you say he took a picture of you when you were drunk, passed out, and not even dating!!! Oh sweetie no no. It’s time to go!!! What kinda creepy predator sh** is that!!!

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He is guilty… :triangular_flag_on_post: :triangular_flag_on_post: :triangular_flag_on_post: :triangular_flag_on_post:

Sounds like a narcissist

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He’s probably got a lot more that’s hidden… and he’s really being a narcissist about it

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:running_woman:t2: :triangular_flag_on_post: I say run while you can.

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Do you know who the girl is from snapchat? I’d reach out to her personally.

This is classic cheater. Please do yourself and your kids a favor and leave.

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Sounds like you should get out of this relationship.

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He may not be cheating at this moment but he did at one time. What he’s doing now is emotional abuse and control. He’s trying to get your spirits down so you’ll never leave him no matter what he does to you. Get your babies and leave.

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His a** cheating, leave asap

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He sounds like a catch :worried:

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Guilty one accuses my grandmother’s quote :raised_hands:t3::raised_hands:t3: No disrespect and I don’t wanna assume but it kinda sounds like he has a taste for something he didn’t want you to know or find out about and it’s easier to put it on you as why would he wanna take accountability :woman_shrugging:t2:

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See yanking it put his hands knowing your digging knowing you will find more
Deffo get him to fuck hun
That’s how it starts trust me

I was in narcissistic abusive relationship and marriage for almost 11 years. I was accused of cheating on him which I never did. But I found out from his boss from construction company telling me he has been cheating on me the whole time. He had a lot of proof of pictures. Also, other 2 jobs, had warning me about him sneaking off and got in the car with girls during lunch break. I didn’t want to believe it but I was blind in love and brainwashed. Til one day I finally busted him and threw him out the door. Filed divorce and got full custody of my 2 kids. It was horrible divorce and battles of custody for 3.5 years.

So you are in narcissistic and mentally abuse relationships and not good for those babies to live like that. I would leave and deleted all of those pictures completely. Start getting restraining order again him and get full custody of the kids.

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Guilty , all ways blame u to try and justify what there doing ,

His guilty fck, why accuse you if his so innocent always the case doesn’t matter if it was years ago he still didn’t admit to it and u don’t know about it so it means he could be busy now that’s y he gets defensive his a lying piece of shit end oc story dont marry that asshole

:eyes: girl…He’s cheating on you. Smh

any guys taking pictures of you that you were unaware of is TRASH.

Whether he is projecting or not, he is atleast gaslighting you.

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In my experience if I was being accused in that way. It wasn’t because I was cheating. HE was cheating!

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Girl, run while you can! :running_woman::running_woman::running_woman: This kind of behavior will get worse! He seems to be looking for a reason to leave, or just guilty from his own actions! Sorry you are going through this! Having a 2 year old and pregnant is not easy when dealing with this stuff, but you’ll get through this! Hope you have the family and resources to get help if you decide to get out. Hugs

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That’s because he’s cheating

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Throw the whole man out ! He’s trash.

Usually the accuser is the one cheating

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LEAVEEEEEEEEE asap!!! Or it will only get worse and you will be stuck. I have a situation so fucking similar to you it’s sick and it got so much worse. I’m literally going through the very end right now. I had decided to stay. We had two kids at the time and had one more afterwards. I wish I left, I will never be able to trust him again. And I’ve literally wasted soo much time and energy trying to make it work. I thought because we had kids I had to stay. I was wrong. I wish I had a friend tell me this, please leave! For you and those babies!

Message me if you need anyone! :yellow_heart:

I’d leave his ass now, save the trouble of doing it later.
Classic case of “Do as I say, Not as I do!”
He dont deserve you.
He will keep you pregnant and miserable!
Ask yourself this…
Do you want this 4years to turn into 40? And you look back on you’re life wishing for all those years back…!
Fix it now bc if you feel this way now…it will only get worse.!
Internet wins again!

He’s a narcissist, massive red flag … Leave it will only get worse

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Let me give the only guys response I can’t see any dudes here…so here it is…leave while you still can…don’t stay because of the children…you will find someone else who treats you like you deserve. Don’t find any excuse to stay. He won’t change. If you stay He wins he now knows he can get away with it. He is staying because he has the power. He knows he has something steady when is hunting runs dry. Please think about how this makes you feel, and ask yourself would you ever want your kids to feel like that. Move on and away

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Get out!! He kept that sh!t from you!! Please unless you want to try but it seems to me he doesnt tell you everything

So when are you leaving?

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In my experience I always found, the one that’s accusing is the one that’s doing !!!

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Run when they start blaming you for cheating means they are cheating. And the fact he was taking pictures of you passed out drunk :flushed:

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He’s guilty!! Move on sweetie. Love yourself and your babies more.

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He’s cheating himself… classic putting it on you. Geez, I’m sorry. I really hope not but it’s looking like that.

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He took pictures of you when you were passed out. Omg. Run. What a disgusting POS.

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Run and don’t look back…from previous experience, you and your kids deserve better! Your a strong momma and deserve to be happy and it isnt with him. Hugs dear! Stay strong momma!

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He’s cheating or looking for an opportunity to cheat

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I think you already know the answer, which is to leave.

My soon to be ex did the same thing. I just kicked him out 2 weeks ago because I confirmed it. You know in your gut, just like I did. No one deserves that.

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Insecurities to the Max, this was my life for 2 years. Every day i got accused and fuck it was annoying.
Run now! They will never change

Good look for ish you’ll find it. Funny you found crap from before you were together and or some boobs he saved and now you want to start a all out war. Y’all got bigger problems them some damn pictures in a phone.

Take.your child and go, this dude is cheating

Girl leave, hes cheating forsure.

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Get rid of him run and run fast because instead of screaming at you to give him his f****** phone next time you’ll be ripping it out of your hand or beating you in the face with it

i really hope you take a moment to soak all of this in and realize your worth and leave before you make the mistake of marrying this fool. He kept them for a reason, it will never get better. There was no trace of him even feeling sorry for the incident. He will get to the point where he has multiple phones because now he knows youll go through it. Narcissist. RUN!!!

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Um yea I’d get outta there… that doesn’t sound like a good situation at all… not only because of the 7 sets of boobs on his phone but the fact that he took a photo of you when you were out of it… that’s some perverted stuff right there… he sounds like a typical narcissist as well

Yes, he’s guilty of cheating. My ex husband was doing this behavior to me, so I got on his phone when he slept. He would not let me see it, which is a huge sign. I stayed up u til 3am writing out the messages and dates. Over 30 different women starting from the time we were officially dating all the way through our marriage. There were pics too.

He has more to hide thts why he yanked the phone out of your hand.

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This is so toxic. Don’t get married.

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He’s cheating if he’s accusing you

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Oh girl he’s the one cheating. Been there done that.

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Leave him alone and live a decent life with your babies… Period!!!

Once you have to go through phones the trust is gone and or the trust was never there and if you dont have trust you have nothing to build a relationship on

He didn’t like the fact you have seen. Through him kick him to the curb move him and his phone out x

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Red flag, red flag, red flags all around. Get your babies and run girl.

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Leave his stupid A$$

Run, I lived this same life & mark my words, hes cheating. The guilty always accuse & are angry when their accusing because its their own guilt shining thru.

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Get away from him you deserve better and you should not be accused of infidekity as usually that is the accuser… js

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Leave
Hunny take those kids and leave

He invaded your privacy in a major major way with that photo. Don’t stick around.

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Just leave . There is way more than what u found .
None the less its freaky to have pics of u without your consent thats tech sexual assault. If hes done this to u hes done it to others.
U and ur kids deserve better .
Hes mad u found things on him and he found nothing on u

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Yes Whenever they always accuse you its because there doing something. I went threw it. When they get mad that is another sign.

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He is the cheater. That is the behavior, accusing you to justify what he is doing. You don’t need to look at his phone. He will make sure there is nothing there. It is rare that a cheater will stop forever. When they think they have gotten by with it with you one time, they figure they can do it again. Your choice, but you can’t control him, do what is best for you and your kids.

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Guilty dog barks first … run.

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Run! I’m just now escaping 5 years and 2 kids with a cheating narcissist. Almost cost me my sobriety and sanity… now I’m mentally built for his shit and it makes him CRAZY

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That’s what happen to me, he accused me of cheating but I wasn’t it was his guilt coming out.

He’s cheating. My ex did the same thing. It’s projection.

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He’s accusing cause he’s doing sneaky shit

Narcissist run!!! You are not over reacting!!! It will only get worse!!! Save yourself and you children! Im talking from massive experience :crossed_fingers::pray::crossed_fingers::pray::pray:

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Yep. Time to take the kiddos and go.

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