sahm is sooooo hard. I feel constantly overwhelmed with how much there is to do.
For me 100% stay at home mom
I don’t think that you can compare. They are both hard but it also depends on the person. Some women want children but still want to work and other don’t. So there is no comparison, they are both hard!!!?
I think both are equally hard. The two are equally difficult. Stay at home moms get overwhelmed so do working moms. Just being a mom is difficult. Are you doing the right things? I don’t think the two should ever be compared. We are all moms.
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Being a working mom for me is hands down EASIER than being a stay at home mom. We have the means for me to stay home but I choose to work for my own sanity and individuality.
Done both, stay at home is harder for sure. I work full time in an extremely busy vet clinic and every day I come home I am drained but still staying at home was harder for me.
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It’s going to depend on the person for each situation. I don’t foresee being a SAHM being practical for me because i need interactions outside the home and a strict routine for my mental health. Other women are the complete opposite
I’m a Cna and I think it’s harder being a sahm, I have 4 kids. Youngest is 3 and oldest is 9……38 residents to get up is easier than my 4!!!
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Working a real job is obviously harder
Imo stay at home is harder especially when they are younger its just more work around the clock work
Home is harder. Never could I ever. 
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I would think both are difficult and have their own challenges. Staying home…you are isolated, surrounded by kids all the time, lose your Identity, and it’s literally 24/7 caretaking/cleaning etc. But working moms have work stress, then come home and have to clean/cook/caretake.
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I have raised 6 kids, i would rather work. But, with that many kids, comes lots of different appointments.
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I’ve done both. I absolutely love staying home and taking care of the house and the kids. Working outside the home, I felt like I never had enough time to work, get the house work done, spend enough time with my kids and my husband, and to spend at least a little time each week on my own hobbies. As a stay at home mom, I am constantly cuddling my babies and the housework gets done, and I can spend some time with just my husband while the kids have their allotted screen time, and then I can stay up a little later to read or write or watch a movie and still get a decent amount of sleep.
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I really think it depends on the support system you have around you. If you are both working and doing 50/50 with house and kids it is much less stressful than working all day and still doing everything at home. If you are staying at home and still have regular social interaction with adults you like it’s less stressful than being completely isolated. Also financial stuff…
I’ve been on both sides with different factors and honestly it’s tough to call. When you’re only with the kids all day you miss working. When you’re at a shitty job you’d rather be with your kids. Bottom line being a mom is hard and no matter what someone will judge you and tell you to be grateful for your situation.
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Yes. The answer is yes.
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Being a mom is hard period. I believe noth are extremely hard. Parenting is hard but worth it
Right now I am a SAHM to three kids - a girl who just turned 6, a boy that just turned 4, and my boy who will be 2 next month. It’s very difficult on me to manage all three especially because my middle one has a speech delay so he requires a lot of “extra work” so-to-say.
My husbands job has been very rewarding for him but let me tell you they say with great power comes great responsibility. He works insane hours. The pandemic has had him work those insane hours from home which is nice but also sucks for obvious reasons.
There really isn’t a way to compare the two roles. Being a primary/sole provider to our family of 5 I don’t doubt is difficult for my husband at times. Me doing 90% of the childcare work round the clock has taken a major mental and emotional toll on me.
The key here is to not take your stresses from work or the kids out on each other and use those things against each other. Of course this isn’t always going to be easy and yes you both will spend some time “competing” for the title of “who has it harder”. There is no winner in this “contest” because both roles are difficult.
Try (it is hard, but will be worth it) to be there for each other - you make the effort to perhaps make him a nice lunch to take to work, and when he is home he takes 30 minutes to read or entertain the kids while you either sit outside or take a nice quiet bath/shower to regroup your thoughts. If you work WITH each other rather than against each other battling over who’s got it harder, there will be a lot more harmony and even though you both will still have your work/SAHM issues, they won’t seem so bad because you’ll look forward to each other’s help/kindness to take the edge off things
I have done both and I think working a full time job is harder. I have 4 kids 11, 4, 3 and 10 months. I love planning our days and watching them grow. I worked so much with my 11yo and missed so much I’ll never get back. Not that being a SAHM is easier but I prefer it to working.
Both. I have done both & neither is easier than the other
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Being a stay at home mom is hard but rewarding and when I was working and taking care if the kids it is a hard job to
I’ve been both and I’d say being a stay at home mom was more mentally taxing. Both are so challenging though!
During the school year, it’s hard because sometimes I have to make the hard choices of missing events or things happening during school. Summer is hard when the boyfriend is away for his work, so strap weeks at a time. Both have sacrifices, but I’m not sure one is harder than the other. Our son is 9. I’d imagine it would be harder for younger.
I think this is an unkind question. Maybe a better one could be “how can I support you in whatever aspects of your life are hard today? Because you are important and I care about you”
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It all depends. If you have a children with behavioral issues or health issues then your always on the go. It never stops plus house work etc. Working and doing both is hard as well. It all has its ups and downs. Maybe cut your hours back enough to still work and have a life. I miss meeting people and making friends . I don’t get much adult conversations .It gets lonely but at the same time I don’t have time for nothing. Being an at home mom nowadays people look at you like your lazy which isn’t true. I don’t like to depend on others for money.
Part of the problem is the attitude of “stuck at home”. Why have children if you feel that way. It is harder to work and then come home and have everything Else to do also.
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Work was my break from my kid. 
I now stay at home and beg for a mental break sometimes.
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No matter which way you shake the stick, you’re a MOM, the hardest job in the world!!!
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Both are hard for different reasons. I prefer to work because I need the intellectual stimulation and adult interaction for my mental and emotional wellbeing.
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They both have there challenges, having been both …I find I’m more organised if I’m working…but I’m a big fan of staying home when little if finances allow it…they grow so quick and work will always be around 
I’ve done both and they are both equally difficult, they just each have their own set of struggles.
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Stay at home mom!!!
I’m a teacher, so I have my summers off and kids stay home with me. Omg, I’ve been home with them 6 days and this is way harder than going to work everyday.
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Try being a stay a home mom and caregiver of a severely disabled child that needs care 24/7 with absolutely everything and will for the rest of your life. That my friend is the definition of hard.
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I work part time and am a full time mum, it’s not easy doing either… the guilt from staying away from my 2 year old is hard when I’m at work and being home with her the other 4 days is hard too… she’s a good kid full of energy and always on the go so it gets stressful to stay on top of cleaning and washing… some days nothing gets done and that’s ok too cause my babies more important than a clean house she will never remember if the house was untidy but will always remember the good times and quality time with mum. I’m a single parent so it might be a little different for me than you but that’s just my view
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I am currently full time work from home and stay at home mom. I think it’s all hard. When I actually left my kids to work that was even harder because I commit fully to my job. I had major guilt about being away so it made work harder for me. I think both are hard but equally fulfilling. It’s different for all parents.
Both. I’ve done both and both have their moments positive and negative.
I’m more stressed being a sahm than I ever was working and I still was the only one that did housework. It was hard in its own way and I missed my babies though. The most stressful with work was the management or really the owner of the business i worked for always criticizing me and making me feel like i couldnt be as good as her “golden employees.”
There both hard either way, because at the end of the day no matter what the mom is taking care of the kids. Only difference working mom gets breaks at work whereas a stay at home mom breaks dont exist… .Not In my home anyways I’m constantly on the go until bedtime and sometimes that doesn’t happen until 10 pm and starts at 7am. Its a long day full of chores and activities for my kiddos. But all in all either job is hard just different circumstances…
Been both. They are equally as hard in my opinion but in their own way. Its hard keeping up with everything when youre home all the time but working you dont get the time with your kids and you still have all the house work to take care of too just for me not as much since we arent home as much
Im a single mother who has a fulltime job working from home and its summer… That’s the hardest role but I still wouldn’t change it.
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Honestly I don’t think it’s fair to compare the two; we each have our own struggles and have our reasons for either working from home/staying home.
Many Moms that are home want to work and many working Moms want to stay home. Either way you Mom; you do the best you can with your circumstances. Unfortunately, the stress will be always be there one way or another. Sometimes the stress is just a little different depending on your situation but you find yourself groove and do what you can. One day at a time.
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I’ve been both. A working mom is harder. For several different reasons.
Working. There’s the stress from work especially depending on the line of work. Worrying about paying bills. But then you still have to worry about the house work, errands, cooking, childcare etc…
I did both and let me tell you what it is not easy. Now I work now and I feel like I hardly see my kids. I feel like I don’t have time to do any house work. My days off I just want to relax. Some days I wish I was home with my children. I feel like I am missing so much with them.
None of it is easy. I have experienced both and each comes with it’s own challenges.
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I’ve been both and while both have their good and bad moments, being a SAHM is harder mentally and emotionally.
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Stay at home mom in my opinion. When I was working it was easier to juggle everything, but that’s for me. Personally I think both have challenges. they both come with there own unique complex situations and every person handles a stressful situations differently.
Both. Each bring their own hardships. Neither is easier then the other. That being said if I could chose either I’d rather be the stay at home mom. Again not that it is easier because I know it isn’t however I’d rather be home with them. The harder part (if there is one) about working is that you are killing yourself for a job that could replace you anytime they’d like, at least if I’m killing myself at home I’d know I’d be there for everything and it would mean more that I was there.
I work full time and have brought my 5 year old with me every single day, all day. There’s the occasional early pick up from dad or one of her grandparents but damn is it stressful. But I don’t think I’d change a single thing if I could. She will be starting Kindergarten soon and both of our worlds will change drastically. But I think that both are equally difficult. Good luck with that argument, my husband and I have had that talk a few times.
I’ve done both, and being a working mom full time is harder for sure. Part time would be more manageable in my opinion.
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Stay at home I prefer to work
Working was much harder for me. I felt beyond blessed to finally be able to stay at home with mine, I’d never consider it stuck. That’s not something I wouldn’t take for granted.
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Staying home is hard because you have to depend on your husband for everything, the job never stops it’s 24/7 but and this is a big but lol I would not trade my time with my kids for anything. Working is hard as well but when your at work it’s like your own time you have an identity your not just someone’s mother or wife, they are only little for a short period of time !
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A working mom… only because “mom” is 24/7 regardless… so add the stress an responsible of a job as well. It’s HARD.
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I also have been both and both equally hard. Both extremely overwhelming at times.
It was harder for me to stay home. With 3 small children, it was honestly mentally draining. So repetitive & lonely. I’m glad I got to do it but my next child will be going to daycare wayyyy sooner than my girls did💯
Personally for me it’s working from outside the home. I’ve done both. I hate that when you work outside the home you lose that flexibility of being able to attend school events, sporting activities for your kids. I always feel like I’m missing out. Work 8 hours, come home, clean try to do laundry, cook diner. Before you know it, it’s 9pm and time for bed.
I’ve experienced both & I feel they are equally as hard. They both bring different types of stress. I feel like working makes me more physically tired, trying to juggle work, spending time with family, and housework. But being a SAHM made me more mentally tired. Having to usually be home all day alone with small children. Having no time for myself. Being a SAHM really is not for the weak tho, I felt like I never got a break.
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I’ve done both… Working is harder in my opinion
I really don’t think it’s something that can be compared between different people. We all have entirely different circumstances so it should be based on the individual. Definitely not a one size fits all topic
I think it depends on the person.
I think it’s harder being a working mom. I miss having really productive days getting things done. Now I barely get anything done because on my days off I just want to relax some. Mentally for me I enjoyed being at home, however I realize that’s not the case for every mom.
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Both are hard. I am a sahm + I run my own business.
I’ve been at home for 6 years and ran a business for nearly 1. My business time is easier and less stressful that feeling like I need to cook, clean, teach and entertain every second of the day but I run it from home so I don’t get any breaks between doing both unless my youngest is taking nap or it’s bedtime. When I leave the house without my kids for work (I am a photographer) I am less stressed than when I’m working at home with them, I think it’s nice to be able to distinguish the two when you’re not constantly home and surrounded by your kids (I don’t use childcare).
Personally for me working is easier because you don’t have to have your mum brain on and it’s mentally stimulating whereas staying at home feels like a cycle of doing the same things.
For me its working full time while being a mom is sooo much more difficult. You literally are going from the time you wake up till the time you go to bed and you have wayyyy less time for house work, grocery shopping and quality family time. You have to work like you don’t have a family and try to get everything else done like you don’t work full time.
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I work at home with my kid…talk about hard!
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I’m gonna say being a single working mom. Because I do both without breaks. And sometimes I just feel like I’m losing my mind.
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Stay home mom I’d say is 24 7 job
I agree with alotta the woman … all Things/ both Ways of life have challenges… I have never had the option. I have worked from each bein 4 months old. And I feel like I was always on the go… and while yes it is great bein someone outside of the house. I was also the one that had to leave to get sick kids, take them to a sitter or family if i needed and go back to work… then I got home with my kids at supper… made supper… bath nightes were baths and cuddles and bed. I personally feel workn is harder even though I havnt seen the other side i had to juggle 40 hours. Kids. House. I was married, My personal life. When i could have one. Lol…once there in school I personally don’t feel it’s a stay at home mom… if there gone from 8:30-3:30 ish… it’s pretty simple, thats when maybe it’s a good time to get a part time job. Every one is differnt. What works for one house may not work for another. But cherish the time cause it’s way to fast… mine r now 17 and 13. And I have a 18 month old grand baby. Take it in while u can 
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Both are WORKING moms. I do think that some people feel that SAHMs aren’t doing much but that couldn’t be more untrue.
I think both are extremely sacrificial and each have their difficulties. They’re both extremely hard. Currently I’m a SAHM & I have the privilege to be with my kids all day, however- It is extremely exhausting. There is no “clocking out”. It’s 24/7. There isn’t much adult interaction or time for myself.
The comparison really isn’t apples to apples though.
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I would say SAHM. At least working you get to talk to adults. You get to leave the house. Staying home with kids is exhausting. The house is always running.
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Definitely depends on the person I guess, I find being a working mum is a lot harder than being a stay at home mum to me
I’ve done both and for me staying at home is 100% harder on my mental health. Since we are home all the time I am constantly cleaning and breaking up fights between my kids etc. when working my house stayed clean because no one was home and I actually had time to myself at work. I ate lunch in peace and had other break times. I will say, working full time is harder on your heart, missing your babies. So it may be hard but I wouldn’t trade it for anything!
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In my opinion working mom cause I work nights and still watch and care for my children thru the day and take care of my household it gets over whelming
Both are hard, they’re just different kinds of hard. Working is stressful and you have guilt of not being there with your kids. Staying home is lonely (unless you find a couple of SAHM friends to get together with) but you’re ALWAYS on duty.
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For me it’s alot easier and more enjoyable than working. I love being sahm being a nurterer and homemaker is my calling. As for my husband he thinks it is much harder and more work to be home cleaning and taking care of our daughter. My respect to the moms that have to do both they have it much harder
I say both us mothers wokbhard at verythig
I think it was harder to be a stay at home mom. I enjoyed going to work. I found it was so much easier to have everything in a schedule when I was working.
Working and being a mom full time. Being a sahm is hard but your husband should be helping around the house and with the kids as well. Just because he works doesn’t mean he gets a pass at parenting or helping with household chores. He lives there and those are his children too. He should want to help it and give you a break sometimes. Being a parent is hard. But marriage is about team work and you should both do things to help the other out.
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I have been a sahm now for 8 years. My oldest is 14, youngest is 4 and I have 4 children. I am busier now than I ever was working away from home. Now I do it all. All the house chores, outside chores, animals- all the homework/schooling. All the appts and soccer games, hockey, art classes, gymnastics. If I was still working out of the house I would have help with all of this. I drive roughly 600 miles a week now taking kids here and there. No I am not kidding!! I don’t get a break, I am 24/7 never ending. I am very thankful to be able to stay home, but it is hard and stressful! I still think actually working out of the home and raising a family is difficult too!! We are all superwomen
I’ve been a stay-at-home mom, a working mom and now a working mom with my kids home almost all the time (thanks COVID - I delayed kindergarten for my twins as a result since I can’t work and do two Zoom classes). I feel like being a working mom is definitely harder. I’m also a single mom though so I’m biased.
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Sahm. Ive done both. Single working mom for 11yrs. Then sahm of newborn twins and an 11yr old. The twins are now almost 5 and I miss my career so much.
I wish this debate would end. Not only with you and your husband but in the world. Both. Both are hard. I’ve done both and I couldn’t tell you which is harder because they are both hard but in different ways. We should stop comparing them like one version of motherhood is better than the other or one side has more reason to complain. The job of raising tiny humans into functioning adults that don’t need therapy when you are done is stressful no matter how you spend the hours in a day.
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Staying at home is mentally & emotionally harder (at least it was for me), working out of the house is harder physically & just as hard emotionally (my present experience).
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I’m both. I work from home and watch my child full time.
Being a mother, stay at home OR working, is hard as hell. I am a single mother and I didn’t have the choice. But, I have been off work for other reasons. NEITHER is easy. We all just have to remember that God promised LIFE. What we do with it, is our choice. All we can do is the best we can and keep our children covered with prayer.
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Being a Mom is hard be it stay at home or being a working mom. Always on call 24/7. But I love every minute of it. 
Both are hard and what works for one person may not work for another. I have stayed home and worked with my 3 children. Work is better for me. I find staying home and looking after my children all day is very draining and I love my career.
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Both, you have to Josh’s the mental ability for both situations , they are both different but equally as hard.
Both are hard in there own ways.
A SAHM doesn’t get out much and goes thru a lot alone. All the house is her responsibility and gets put to feel like she doesn’t contribute
A working mom has to go do a job and still come home be a wife and mother.
I’ve done both and honestly I think a working mom has it harder because in my specific situation I’m expected to provide 100% for my family, I’m a manager at a logistics facility which requires lots of hours but my SO thinks I should also fulfill being a full time mother. He expects me to do it all while he stays home. So my specific situation being a working mom is harder
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I struggled more being a stay at home than I do and a full time working single parent. Both are stressful in their own ways but for me knowing I earned and bought everything for me and my kids makes it more worth while to me
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I’ve done both and, in my opinion, there’s nothing like getting dressed up every morning and driving away to adult life with friends at work, making money, and coming home to family to enjoy the evening with - the house a wreck just stepping over it all feeling sorry for the hired help!! 
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Both are hard for different reasons. Choose your hard and don’t judge anyone’s else’s decision
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I definitely think being a SAHM is harder I hated it! I mean a definitely throw a fit when I have to get up every morning and go to work lol but I love having my money and a break from home and my kids!
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It’s so hard to allow someone else to take care of your kids.
I’ve been all across the board here…
*Worked while my ex stayed home
*Single working mom
*Both me and my (now) husband worked…
*I stay home (currently. Have since 2016)
*Briefly both of us was home.
They all have their challenges.
For me…being a working mom while my ex stayed home was the hardest.
So at that time I worked as a donut cook and a cashier…
Sometimes I worked 12+ hours a day. I was on my feet. I was lucky to get bathroom breaks.
Sometimes I’d be covered in chemicals from cleaning …even had to go to ER for chemical burns once.
I still had to do all the cleaning and most of the cooking. I couldn’t even get cleaned up before he was trying to hand our son off to me.
And our son had (still has) significant medical needs…so I was also trying to get him to therapy and doctors appointments around work.
Now. My ex was toxic and abusive so that’s maybe not the best example of what’s “harder”
Overall, I do still feel like being a working mom was harder. Trying to balance family time, house work, medical stuff, work, and time to keep me from burning out was pretty awful for me. On top of my own issues with anxiety, C-PTSD, and ADHD.
Being a stay at home mom works for me… but it’s not without it’s challenges.
My husband has said he couldn’t do it and wouldn’t want to (when we were both home…he got a very real glimpse of what my days look like)…so he generally takes care of me so I can take care of the kids. It looks different…tonight it’s getting me water and rubbing Neosporin on my legs. Sometimes it’s taking the kids outside to play so I can clean.
I remember one time I got so burnt out I threatened to go to work knowing I’d be handing all of my check plus some of his to childcare…because I needed a break. I felt taken advantage of and just worn down.
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Working mom. Because you still have to do everything a SAHM does too at the end of the day. It never ends. It’s always hard.
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Stay at home mom for sure.
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Most definitely, hands down, stay at home mom.
I hate this debate because they both are hard but in different ways. Being home is mentally and emotionally exhausting. Working plus coming home to do what a stay at home mother does on top of it is physically and mentally draining. May I add, I work during the school year then I am a sahm all summer.
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