Backstory my husband was married previously and her ring was stunning (his mom still has photos of them) it was like the dream ring, she got to go ring shopping with the mother in law and my mother in law paid for it as a gift to her, over 6k and mine wasn’t even $200, it makes me feel cheap and like second best I know it’s not a game of who’s is bigger, but ffs his financial situation is exactly the same if not better, they have no children and marriage was less then a year, we have children and have been married longer then I can count on one hand, I’ve stated many times how much I hate my rings to the point i no longer wear them now at all, my grandmother even offered her rings to me to be resized to fit me and he said no, it doesn’t have as much meaning because he didn’t buy them, I honestly feel embarrassed the ex is still wearing them an I don’t even have a ring on my finger that I can be happy and proud to see daily
From his side he probably just thinks that since this is his second marriage it’s not that big of a deal. As far are your grandmas rings… I’m not sure why he’s getting upset saying it’s not meaningful since he didn’t buy it, but yet his mom is the one who bought the ex wife’s ring??? Doesn’t make sense to me. I would tell him unless he’s buying you a new ring, you’ll be taking your grandmas. Just because he’s been married before and it’s not a big thing to him doesn’t mean it isn’t for you.
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum.
You’ve every right to be mad but think of it this way hers was a gift but your husband bought you yours so yours is more meaningful
So buy new rings? My rings were not expensive, around $50 for both if mine and my husbands and they are gorgeous. If you’re not happy, do something about it.
I feel like his 1st wife’s ring has nothing to do with him, his mom picked it out and paid for it. You don’t know what he went through and what he saw when he found the ring for you… It came from him and that speaks more volume than coming from his mom… If you have the means to buy a new one I would bring up the conversation again and put it into works, but i would not get rid of the other ring i would simply wear it on my other hand
i would grab him by his ear n we would go ring shopping 🤦 . women men are not like us sometimes they just need to be told not us thinking they should know what we want ,when u say u dont like ur ring trust me he doesnt get it the ring doesnt mean nothing to him hes married to u
He thinks of you as the cheap option because you don’t put in to be a spoiled brat like most women. I get treated the same way
IMO, you are not wrong! Especially if he can afford it! Hopefully next holiday or special occasion, maybe he will surprise you!?
But I would definitely stop comparing the 2. The ring he picked was a gift of love to you, his ex wife’s was a gift from his mother
Honestly sounds materialistic to me. Marriage isn’t about rings or the cost of rings. My Dad and brother both wear those silicone rings. My Moms is right around $200 or less. It’s not about money.
Looks like there marriage didn’t last even with fancy rings
It’s the thought that counts
I didn’t like the first set my husband picked and I was honest
Once we were financially better off he sent me off to get my nails done and I went alone and picked my own replacement set. The first set was super cheap but I loved it I just couldn’t wear it because my skin reacted
My second set was both rings $1400 on sale
I think you should be proud of the rings you wear! If you want new rings and don’t like the ones you have, talk your husband into getting new ones.
MATERIAL STUFF!!! shouldn’t matter…what matters is what u n your husband hv for one another… $$$ CANT BY LOVE…
I have more questions.
In the story the mother-in-law gifted the expensive set, the husband did not purchase them.
Are you upset with the mother-in-law or the husband?
I personally went to a pawn shop to get my rings you pay so much less and get so much more ring.
I landed a 12,000$ ring for 500$
It was what I liked, it was my second marriage. Brand new wasn’t an important brag for me, neither was the $$ amount
I overstand where you’re coming from. The ring is symbolic of love and he put no real love and effort into your ring. If he can’t see that, buy your own. If it doesn’t sit well with him, let him go find you something better. He’s being inconsiderate.
I bought my ring from a pawn shop and only got it because it was the only one that fit. Marriage isn’t about the ring its about what the ring symbolizes. I never liked my ring but was proud to wear it. A Marriage is a life long commitment and the ring symbolizes eternity thats why it’s a circle. Being upset because it’s too cheap is wrong. He bought it for you, for his commitment to you compared to it being a gift. Makes you look like your materialistic compared to loving the man who vowed to be with you with the ring he bought you. If your that mad over it maybe it’s not the ring, it’s the entire Marriage.
I know it’s not materialistic things that matter… but I do see your point… it would definitely make me feel odd and I agree with you embarrassed. Has he given you a reason?
A ring don’t make the relationship. She can’t be mad if he didn’t even buy the first wife rings. I’ve had 2 sets of wedding rings, the ones I wear now were on clearance and cost a lot less then my first set, and it was a lot less then $200 but I love them!
We were both married before. Both did the expensive ring thing. Marriages didn’t last. Our Marriage is BLESSED, dare say close to a dream come true. His ring was $12 and mine was $175 . I love them. We chose to not have pricey rings since they don’t represent trust, love, friendship, or happiness. They are just rings. We LIVE our lives happy… that’s the important part. We spend time together, making memories. I’d rather spend 10 days in Hawaii together making memories than spend that money on jewelry.
Talk to hubby about this. If you want a more expensive piece set up payment plan or whatever to make that happen.
My original wedding set was a family heirloom that completely wasn’t something that I loved. It was pretty enough, but not at all my style or color (I like white gold/silver, it was gold), so last year when I lost a tiny side stone, I took the liberty to order a CZ ring that I LOVED. I picked it out and bought it myself, but I don’t think it has any less meaning because I did that. Make yourself happy, even if it’s with a knock off diamond. There are some real great ones out there.
If you measure the love of your husband by the ring, which is something material, then you don’t know what love is, you haven’t really understood what it is to love. He even had kids with you, and you’re thinking about what he gave to the ex. Oh man… If you die tomorrow that man who gave you the “cheap ring” will be taking care of your children, so you shouldn’t be mad darling, it is something material. Don’t measure your love on a ring.
Shop modern gents. Get the look and quality
Ask him one more time, then buy your own!
Why the heck is the ex still wearing hers!? That’s super weird! I gave my ring back to my ex!
Throw a fit untill you get what you want or pretent like you love them and then pretend like you lost it and cry until you get a new better one
Omg!! Material girl!! This sort of thing does not bother me one bit and to be honest a ring doesn’t make a relationship, just be thankful your all together, happy and healthy, you can’t buy love.
Baby you should’ve had this conversation with him before you said “I do”.
I bought myself a new ring when my original one lost a diamond. I kept my band but got a new engagement ring. Hubby lost his original band so I bought him one he wanted. Who cares if he does or doesn’t buy it. It’s the love that matters. He didn’t know I bought a new one till I came home with it.
I think the most important thing is that your relationship is thriving. You say their relationship only lasted a year, but she had an expensive ring gifted to her. You have a ring he picked just for you, and your relationship has years on it. Maybe talk to him about all of this, but dont let it ruin the relationship.
I would have been happy with a ring pop… but he literally didn’t pay or have a day in his first marriages ring maybe that shows how much he cared about their marriage
He shouldn’t expect her to ware them if they are giving her rashes.
Why didn’t you ask for a better ring when he asked you…… go buy it yourself.
I don’t have a ring and had to pawn the one my dad got me it was plain but I loved it.
I’m concerned with the way people think… first why are you comparing anything to the ex?? You have him not her. Marriage isn’t about what your rings look like. Some women want fancy crap n others are happy with what they have. My rings weren’t expensive and I love them. My rings also don’t make my marriage either. If you compare yourself to the ex you will never be happy.
If it is giving you a rash than I would get another ring. I get a rash with rings that are gold plated.
Just pick one tell him it’s what you want and use his card
I completely understand! I was in the same situation. He was mad at me for making a big deal about it but I know it would’ve hurt me forever if I didn’t nip in the butt first things. Especially since he made comments when we were dating about how he had to buy her a bigger ring so guys would know she was taken and see it from far away because he was so in love with her he didn’t want to lose her. He got me a much smaller ring and it made me feel he didn’t feel the same for me as he did her. But we had dated a while broke up, while he healed from his past marriage which I heard about for months and months and eventually when he was over her we got back together. It was hard so I took it personal but he didn’t see it that way. It’s only been a few months since I got the ring and he still brings it up but I don’t feel guilty about it and you shouldn’t either.
Sooooooo this is a group I followed for nail inspo and yall don’t post nails anymore?? let me go ahead and exit the chat
If it what’s makes you feel good as your husband he should take that extra mile to make you feel good . Y’all made that vow . Materialistic or not , you laid down and bared kids , your life and everything else the least you can get is a decent ring that doesn’t turn your finger green . You shouldn’t have to go buy anything yourself , if finances are in order he should take some extra tlc to make you feel good period . Aint nothing wrong with the way you feel and your feelings shouldn’t be minimized
buy your own then. my husband didn’t buy me a ring. I got my grandmother’s. and even if I didn’t have hers I’d be happy with an 8$ walmart ring. the price of the ring doesn’t define the marriage.
Buy a plain gold band. 80 bucks. No bling, just something that says your married.
If your husband wants you to have something that screams “I bought this for my wife” he can go get it…
If it bugs you, then it’s important. Remember that
Rashes alone is enough reason to get a new ring… be honest with how you feel, honesty the best policy
I would be hurt so I get it. You should tell him how you feel.
But the rings before weren’t bought by him. They were bought by the MIL correct? So maybe he isn’t a buying rings sort of person. Just talk to him.
You should never be forced to wear rings you hate. I know everyone says it’s the thought that counts but you have to wear it not them. And while I don’t think price matters, if the guy is well off and pays 200 yeah get out. Red flags. If the guy is struggling and only pays 200 I wouldn’t care but damn right I want ones I actually like and think they matter. He rejected the grandmothers even though he knows. That shows disrespect that goes beyond the rings
No more nookie till you wtfu, I want rings that fit, don’t cause rashes and are mine
I’d be happy he bought you one, some women don’t get anything…
Go to Pandora there rings are stunning
I wonder if you can paint it with some clear nail polish. Maybe that would help with the rash.
Im sorry hes being so stubborn about it.
I wonder if there is a way to use the current ring to create something new and prettier and more comfy, from the old diamonds, like turning it into a pendant. At least the rash wouldnt be as big of an issue.
Honestly, I think of the ring is giving you a rash, you should simply take it off and let him know that you physically cant wear it due to the allergy.
I have an engagement ring that is a half size too small, and it rubs my finger a little raw, so I usually cant wear it for long. I always wear my wedding band, but it fits just fine.
You have to enforce your boundaries. But dont make it about money or comparing your ring with someone elses. If it really gives you a rash, you should not wear it. Tell your husband you dont want to get an infection from the open skin and end up losing a finger. Wear the ring on a necklace.
Just leave it at that. If he has a problem with it, then oh well. This ring still gives your finger a rash so just tell him you are TRUSTING him to solve that problem for you.
Not wrong of you at all. Tell him flat out that you would like to go for your next anniversary and upgrade rings together. If he doesn’t want to then I say use your grandmas or whatever is special to you. It’s not like you don’t like it solely based on size snd have legit problems with it so I’d say that is fair enough.
Stop wearing it. He’ll get the hint
I think you’re being petty honestly the guy is with you he has children with you he has been married to you for a long time obviously he looks at the bigger picture you guys are family you guys lasted unlike the ex with the expensive ring that’s all she got let her have it you are the winner here. And if it bothers you so much pressing the issue until he buys you one I don’t think it will make you feel better because it would not have been his ideas so it would not mean as much because it’s not as special because you were basically trying to force him into buying you something nicer you see what I’m saying it would not be as special
Go buy them yourself, I would
What an as$hole. Find an ex of yours and offer to buy him a 6K toy of his liking . Seriously, anyone who has had to wear a cheap shit ring knows how much they cause dermatitis and itch like hell!
I mean or you could just be appreciative, nothings ever guna be good enough for y’all this generation ain’t got no respect, no selflessness, no care. If it causing your skin to break out tell him that and bring it to a jewelry shop and get it plated or look into a custom made replica with nicer metals. Honestly with that attitude I’m surprised he even married you. Y’all don’t think bout no one but yourselves sometimes
Stand for your reason. You need to say how you feel and be honest to him straight up! He needs to hear how bad you feel wearing it.
Worry about more important things in life than a fancy ring
Its the thought that should matter not the price of the ring but if the ring is causing rashes and other physical issues to your hand then I’d say it’s time for a new ring. The price on the ring though should not matter in my opinion it’s the thought that should mean more then the price of the ring.
The cost of wedding rings, a wedding dress, a wedding, or honeymoon is not correlated with marital success. You stated your MIL purchased the ex wife’s rings. Not your husband. I’m not understanding how you can hold him accountable for a purchase that he didn’t make?
I ask again, why are you guys still seeing his ex if they have no kids together?
I wear mine on a necklace it doesn’t fit anymore an only cost $85. An you can always put clear nail polish on it to seal the metal so it won’t touch your skin an cause a rash. An as far as the “ex” if they have no children why is she even a factor. Let that sh*t go seriously it’s only going to drive you crazy.
My ring was only $100. My husband and I picked it out together. Its not the price of the ring that matters. Go on a date and pick something out together that’s meaningful to you both. My ring is an opal which is both mine and my husbands birth stone.
Girl go buy ur own ring. No it’s not about the size but the fact it breaks you out is bad. Do u want the big fancy ring or just a different one, nicer than 200?! I’ve seen this, they don’t want to spend the money on the second wife cause the first one did they wrong. Blah blah blah, it was a waste of money blah blah blah
My fiancé got my engagement and wedding ring set from Pandora
Tell him u want new rings … Be direct about the situation and how u feel … If he decides to do nothing then u see how he feels
I get it. It’s not necessarily about the ring it’s about feeling like you mean enough to him for him to want to give you something nice. If it was all he could afford at the time then ok that’s fine but if it bothers you and you can afford a better one then I’d go purchase what I want it’s not like he has to ask again so take it into your own hands…
Be like “oh no babe my ring! Its gone! I am so sad” and toss your house pretending to look for it.
Oh no. How sad. Its gone for ever. Cry. A little. Make it believable. Getchu a new ring… or man lol
His mom bought her ring I’m sorry I’d rather have a $.25 candy machine ring my husband lovingly got for me, then my mother-in-law pay for the a $6,000 ring . I think you’re looking at the wrong way. My ring was from the pawnshop. I’ve been with my husband for 23 years the size or price of the ring doesn’t correlate how much he loves you or how beautiful your life is together focus on that.
I had to get a makeshift ring that didn’t even have real diamonds. They were white sapphires. (We didn’t have a lot of money but that doesn’t matter to me) I don’t even know what happened to it and I don’t wear a ring anymore. I would love to have a ring to show off but honestly just knowing my husband loves me and our daughter as much as he does and the fact we have recently celebrated our eight years is enough for me. Worrying about a ring is pretty petty and childish and materialistic.
If you don’t want to wear your rings, then that’s your choice. If you have an issue with your rings, then again that’s on you. I don’t wear my rings. I only wear them when I am going out. My husband always wears his ring. It’s a choice, in my opinion.
talk to him about it!!! You’re allowed to feel the way you do, have a conversation with him about it!
If you can afford it, get new ones.
This sounds like you’re just materialistic honestly. My husbands ex had a 3k ring. Mine was $140, I prefer moonstones so it was cheaper. Me and he were 2 different people who like different things. The value of the marriage itself is what should count, not the value of a piece of jewelry that essentially has no meaning.
A ring is a piece of metal. You got the husband she did not. You have the love and marriage, she does not. If she feels the need to keep flashing a ring, that don’t have any meaning attached to it. Well, IMO it shows what she is holding on to.
If you want a new ring, tell your SO, and let them know maybe for an anniversary gift…tell him…no one is a kind reader. you are entitled to feel the way you feel. Just don’t make it into a huge thing, it isn’t worth it IMO
Did you talk to your husband…wait why am I asking this? Obviously you didn’t. You came on social media to bash your husband, show how jealous of your husband’s ex wife’s rings you are and didn’t mention once talking to him about it first. TALK TO YOUR GODDAMN HUSBAND!
I mean if its breaking you out that bad, hang it on a chain around your neck…go get you one yourself. Wait his ex still wearing her rings?
The ring doesn’t define your marriage. My husband ordered me a $30 engagement ring from Amazon that was too big. I bought my own Pandora engagement ring ($60). Me and my husband split my wedding band($300). Yes, I could have better rings but at the end of the day it doesn’t define his love for me. If I had to choose, I’d do it all over again.
- I’d stop comparing what you have to what someone else has, it’ll only ever make you miserable.
- Talk to him. Maybe you can get an anniversary ring or the like.
- If your hands are breaking out, it’s likely a metal allergy, and lots of different rings can cause it. I also have an allergy, and can’t really wear any metal.
- Stop focusing on the price of the ring. I went from a $40 wedding band for 10 years to a $350 anniversary ring that I adored, but my metal allergy now has me in silicone rings (and I get 6 of them for $12). I wear my ring as an oath to my husband, not to show off to the world how much my rings may cost.
Sounds pretty petty. Especially when people have real problems in the world.
Did u marry him for the rings or for who he was?? I mean I get they break you out and that’s a great reason to get a higher quality gold but geez.
I’m just going to say this he is doing it bc ur allowing it. U shouldn’t have to live in anyone’s shadow.
If you are married for the ring then you are married for the wrong reason
Put them on a necklace!
A ring shouldn’t make you happy in a relationship. Maybe that’s all he could afford. Sometimes being grateful goes a long way
No need for expensive rings,but at least a new one that doesnt hurt your finger. Tell him to pay to risize your Grandmothers, maybe add some baggets.
My ring was 175 dollars and I picked it out. Honestly it’s not about the ring or the price tag on the ring…
If he loves you that should be the only thing that matters in my opinion.
You got the man; all she’s got is a ring! You won!!
thats just weird af idk just get yoruself a nice biggo ring if he dont want to get you a better one you can do it girl
Be direct and tell him why you feel the way you feel about the rings and the ex etc .
Clearly everyone is focused on the wrong thing here and completely missing the point of her concern
My partner and I are together 20 years. Not married. No rings…don’t need a ring to prove he loves me.
Buy your own badass ring. Don’t be a punk like the ex
Have you talked to your husband about it? Also remember it’s not the rings that make the marriage, it is much more than that and of you feel ot is the rings that make the marriage you may have other issues.
Just because the MIL paid for the first wife’s set doesn’t mean she has to pay for the second set, it could have been a deal they worked out to begin with prior.
Also, why would the ex still want to flash the rings that have no meaning around? That is crazy. And why? Has she noticed on?
Also, talked to your husband about your grandmother’s rings and what it would mean to you and her for you to have them. Maybe look at getting them blessed to have a special meaning of your marriage to your husband and not just another set of rings.
Maybe he is scared to spend that kind of money again cuz of his first failed marriage. This is something yall need to sit down and discuss
200 dollar ring that is falling apart? You simply made a poor material choice. My ring is considerably less and I have no issues at all. Simply buy something made with better material, it doesnt need to be expensive, just do some research or request hubby gets you a better skin friendly option
Also super confusing about why him being better of finance wise now matters because he didnt even buy the other women a ring, his mother did…
Lol im sorry… But u have the man the family the kids… She has a ring… That he didnt even buy grow up
Find the ring you want and tell him that’s what you want for Christmas it is so frustrating that men do this. In all reality if I were a man and I went cheap on a ring that my wife would display 24/7 in every setting, i would be ashamed. No it’s not about the ring but make her feel worth it
She’s allowed to want a better ring lol