Is my fiance right to be upset?

If u getting paid then it don’t matter if they want to sit next to u the entire time. Ur getting paid girl who cares

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That’s your job? Regardless of that they are doing… I mean he will be busy gaming so…

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Overreacting for sure

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Overreacting. Sounds like insecurities. If they are paying you to do a job they are relying on you like they would a stranger to do the job.

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It’s your job sooo tell him get over it

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He’s taking off work for something that won’t allow him to watch the kids. So yeah, you’re being ridiculous. It’s your job and he’s not going to actually be available or around to handle childcare. Your fiancé sounds paranoid and jealous and you should not enable that whatsoever. If you’re looking for a day off for yourself, then set that up with your friend.

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I was gonna start babysitting 2 weeks ago. Of course my husband was mad. He said it was too much bc I have a 1 year old. I was still gonna do it but the lady that told me to babysit never replied so… I got excited for nothing… :unamused:

It doesn’t seem like you were upset until your fiancé said something to you. Is your fiancé being controlling? That’s a huge red flag :triangular_flag_on_post:. Just think about it before you say “I do.”

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Seriously???

Y’all are upset about a change of plans like this?

Wow. This is your friend’s husband. And your friend wouldn’t put you at risk.

Your fiancé either trusts you or he doesn’t. PERIOD

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Regardless of they are home or not they are wanting you to babysit. What if they were working from home? Sounds like your fiance is insecure and worried about you cheating on him if left alone with this man. I would never allow my fiance to prevent me from doing my work.

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Are you getting paid? The. Whats the difference? They are making sure their kids are taken care of, so they can do something.

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If your still being paid for the day of your service I don’t really see much problem with it

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If your still being paid, who cares ?

If they pay you who cares. !

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It’s your job!!! You committed to babysit! If Friday is normally a day you “work” then yes,you both are absolutely over reacting!

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I’d be bothered to. Being that Dad will be home he can at least take his child to school in the morning. He sounds lazy!! I’m sure his gaming isn’t til later on. I say they should take to school and have you come over later if anything.

If it’s your job do it. If you don’t want to work that day tell your friend :woman_shrugging:

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If they’re paying you, why does it matter whether her husbands at home or not? If it would be awkward for you, that would be one thing. Since your boyfriend is the only one to be bothered by it, it seems like he’s just trying to control you. This is your job. Don’t say no just because your boyfriend is controlling and insecure.

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Oh my god… u are gonna lose alot of job opportunities and even friends over ur boyfriend/gonna get married too .

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This was probably the stupidest question I’ve ever seen on here. :exploding_head: just my opinion :joy:

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Are you still getting paid? :rofl: if you are, this is ridiculous. Make money, girl, and chill tf out

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He’s insecure.
He doesn’t trust you.
:triangular_flag_on_post::triangular_flag_on_post::triangular_flag_on_post::triangular_flag_on_post:

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It seems like he doesn’t trust you. If your getting paid for it what’s the big deal.

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Ugh. That’s 45 seconds of my life I’ll never get back

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You are way overreacting. And honestly, if this causes issues in your relationship now, your relationship won’t last.

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If I was the person paying YOU for babysitting my children on a scheduled day (I wouldn’t think it was your business what my husband or I did on those scheduled days, besides for emergency purposes.) and you told me your boyfriend wasn’t happy about you working I’d definitely have to let you go and find someone else…. Because idc what my babysitters boyfriend thinks of our schedule lol

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I use to nanny 4 little girls the mom was gone at work dad stayed home too work and I hardly ever talked to him only to ask were things are honestly doesn’t matter in my opinion if he there there paying you to babysit and sounds like the dad has things he’s doing I don’t see why he’d be upset it’s a job

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Wow these comments. I guess Ima be the odd one out here!!. She’s a babysitter not a nanny. If you’re getting paid tho I would still do it if I were you however I understand the irritation. I would feel weird being around a married man all day alone too that isn’t family. I understand where you’re coming from 100%! A lot of you girls on here are completely judgmental and unsupportive! I think some of you are missing the fact he took a day off work for a VIDEO GAME. Cmon now … Would you let ur sons stay home from school to play a video game? If you said no then you’re contradicting yourselves and being hypocritical. Also again a babysitters job is to watch the kids not take someone to a doctors appointment… You guys are basically saying it’s okay for a man to put a video game over watching his own children. The audacity of all of you because I feel like this would’ve gone a lot different if it was the mom or female taking off work for a video game! “Let him do what he enjoys” okay and he can do that when his kids are asleep or with someone overnight. & it isn’t too far of a stretch for a boyfriend to be a little upset for their girlfriend to be with a married man alone. I bet half of you don’t let ur men have female friends. I just really can’t believe them comments smh.

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Yooo! He has the right to remain silent, he had no rights to intervene in stuff that doesn’t personally effect him :joy: I’ve seen some crap posted here but really?! You agreed to babysit, that’s your job. Doesn’t matter if her husbands home or not, your getting paid to do a job. so you do the job :roll_eyes: I’d be more thinking the other side of things, If you back out now, your friend will more than likely look for help elsewhere because you were fine to agree before and now your not. If her husbands playing a pay to enter event or a tournament that is an all day thing. You’ve got to be there when the event launches or you can’t join it :woman_facepalming:t2: I doubt you’ll even see him beyond him popping out to get snacks or a drink

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Girl get over it… Thats literally your job.

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There’s kinda a lot going on here…enough that it’s not just a simple yes or no.

  1. Are you getting paid?
  2. Why can’t your friend run herself if her husband is home?
  3. Has running her to errands been part of your “job” since all this started?

If you’re getting paid to do these things then, I would say it may be a bit of an overreaction on your part.
Plenty of people still use sitters or send their kids to daycare if they’re off in the middle of the week when they can afford it. Similar to hiring a sitter for date night.
You as the paid babysitter don’t get to dictate what the parents are or are not doing when you’ve agreed to watch the children for money. You can refuse to babysit or run her around of course, but they may not offer you to sit again.
So if this is something you want to continue to do in general… I’d consider that carefully.

If you’re not getting paid for any of this or you’re charging them a super super low amount just to be helpful when they absolutely need a sitter, then I would say you’re not overreacting.
Helping someone out whose in a bind for childcare so they can work doesn’t mean that you’re obligated to do this when they don’t actually need the help.
The compromise here could be date night type payment to you instead of free/super cheap.
Or just straight refuse for the reason you’ve stated.

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It’s a job, you’re getting paid. What the ‘bosses’ do on their day off is their business. What does it matter if he’s home or gone all day and you thought he was at work?

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Is there a reason she wants you to take her to the doctor and not her husband?

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So basically your fiancé doesn’t want you around another man alone is what it boils down to. Babysitting the children is your JOB. If you are getting paid to babysit then you need to be there regardless if one parent is home or not. If I take a vacation day off of work I still send my kids to the learning center because I PAID them for that week and it is their job & they damn sure will be earning the $300 I paid to send the kids their.

It’s literally the same thing as working from home! BUT! What’s the most important is that you feel safe. IF you have any doubts, only you can make that choice. Be safe and take care!

But hes doing a video game event so hes not just home and capable. Hes clearly busy and youre still gonna get paid. Id go and do my job. Its friday and you would be working regardless. What does your fiance even have to do with it?

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Well if your going to be busy with dr app and dropping kid off at school and they are paying you then fuck it. Some video game event are a big thing to people, I’ve seen people win a lot of money in video game stuff. But I would just take the kids out and once she gets home drop them off and take a day to yourself. But sometimes just being a dude it’s better then getting pissed cuz he stayed home. If she’s your actual friend and not just $ or acquaintances

My fiance wouldn’t like that idea if the dad I’d going to be no need for you to be there as well. My opinion no matter wat your fiance is only looking out for your safety in my opinion as a spouse should. Coming from a woman who has a great man who thinks of any situation an always wants his woman to be safe. Like I said not necessary to be there if an adult is there no baby sitting needed.

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Just say “oh you’re going to be home so I’m not needed” why’s this is a huge thing.

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What does it matter if he’s home ? If you are getting paid and it’s your job then :woman_shrugging:. Also your fiancés opinion matters when it’s your fiancés job. This is ultimately your choice and your job.

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If he’s involved in a video game event, he will be all into the game.

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If he’s home but has this video game event then he will probably be busy with that. Unable to bring the kid to school and your friend to her appointment. Hence why they still need you to come but if you’re uncomfortable with him being home then tell them you can’t come that day. Sooner than later.

i mean you’re getting paid, and yeah he’ll be home but he’s attending some video game event which means he can’t take care of the kids and go to a doctors appointment. i don’t see the issue, you’re working for them and getting money for doing so. stop working for this friend if it’s such a big issue to you and your fiancé lol.

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What does your boyfriend have to
Do with this ! If he is involved now wait til
U get married ! Unless you asked for his
Opinion! I e been married for 68 years and my husband would not get involved unless I asked !

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You clearly stated that this is your job. You’re being paid, correct? People have a nanny or babysitter when they’re home all the time.

Now, let’s talk about your comment that because it involves you, and because you’re getting married that it’s your boyfriends business. No. Just no. Of course communication is key in any relationship, but for him to be pissy because you have to work… that’s a red flag. Is he gonna act like that when you go to work for an actual company and they schedule you on a day that he doesn’t like? Sounds to me like his issue is jealousy. You’re gonna be at their house, while her husband is there.

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He can’t play games and pause them and babysit… It’s called multitasking and parenting… I would be pissed too

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Overreacting for sure! If you agreed to babysitting without a written policy, that specifically states that you will not watch them with another adult in the house. He is participating in a competition and you are the babysitter. I really see nothing complex about the situation other that your SO apparently does not trust you.

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He’s home but doing a gaming event so he’s technically not able to watch the kids and needs your assistance. No you don’t get to be pissed off. It’s the exact same as if someone was working from home and needed in home care.

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If I was still being paid and I wasn’t required to take care of her husband I wouldn’t have a problem with it. I’m assuming he will be busy with the game if he had to take off work to participate.

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Are you being paid?..if yes I don’t see an issue…or just say you won’t be available…

So you would just be taking a kid to school and her to the doctors? To me that would be ok. Now if I have to actually sit with the dad for an extended period of time and was uncomfortable I would be upset

Kick him to the curb, what a effin idiot!! Fiance that is, showing his true colours now)! RUN!!!

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Husband taking day off from work to play video games. Not taking his wife to a medical appointment. Not taking his child to school. Not a real man. End your relationship with this family. Plenty of other families to babysit for.

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Why is nobody asking why the bf is so jealous. That is a huge red flag if he is not confident in your relationship why even be in one. That is your job and your bf husband why should this even be a concern?

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I guess I’m not understanding the issue.

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Your fiancé doesn’t trust you. Red flag.

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This is dumb. You’re just basically getting paid to hang out w your friend for that day and baby sit their child while her husband plays a game uninterrupted. I suggest since this seems to be an issue, you and your future husband not have children bc it seems the issue of having to watch the child is a problem bc you both feel like you shouldn’t be responsible but you’re getting paid. It’s hard for some people to accept easy money :woozy_face:

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So you’re not allowed to work with men/ work where men are, just because you’re gonna get married? :roll_eyes:

Damn! What’s wrong with your fiancé? :triangular_flag_on_post:

I babysit kids all the time & the parents are home. They are busy doing things.

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If youre getting paid to babysit, who cares what hes doing? Parents are allowed breaks too and if youre being paid to babysit, your being paid to babysit no matter what the parents are doing. Sounds like your boyfriend doesnt trust you.

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So confused at who has a problem & exactly what the problem is lol.

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It doesn’t matter if the husband is home. If he’s busy doing something else and they are paying you and you normally work that day anyway who cares. Your fiancé sounds like he is controlling and doesn’t trust or want you around other men. It’s your job not his so it’s up to you.

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One say bye to your man, he’s an idiot and doesn’t trust you. Two parents are allowed to do other things, if you are getting paid to do a job do the job.

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You’re being over dramatic to the point of being a stereotypical Millennial…none of us want that. This is your job. It doesn’t sound like you’re a babysitter, it’s called being a Nanny & they are with the kiddos when the parents are home all the time. Either do your job or find a new line of work.
Also, your fiancée either sounds like an immature brat or a controlling douche canoe, you may choose

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Are you not getting paid? This is stupid. I am off every Friday but my babysitter still gets the kids so I can have a day off. I use to feel bad about it but this is her job and if I’m paying her then what’s the problem.

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You are overreacting imo…
You already agreed to do this and if it considered your job, then that’s that. What does it matter if they are home or not? If he has plans then he is still busy, and you are probably to treat it as he’s not even there. It’s not like you are babysitting him? And it sounds like you won’t even be there.
I use to nanny and a lot of times one of the adults would be home for something, or take off to go do other things. But I still showed up and did what I was asked because that was my job. Don’t be petty.

Is it because it’s Christmas Eve and he would rather you be with your own family?

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Yeah, I see no problem with the dad wanting interrupted child time when he’s at home. Would I personally pay for it? No. Lol but that’s more money than anything. I feel like your husband has a problem with the idea of it being another man, but it’s a job just like any other day. Also, just because you are married, doesn’t mean he has a say over your career

You can be upset but if they pay you…? How’s it different than if he wasn’t there? It doesn’t matter what he’s doing. That’s not your business tbh.

Cant you take the child to your house for the day?

He’s going to be doing something still that is important to him. Yes still help out if you can. This is your job and you were expected to work it anyways. If they are going to pay you for it then do it. And those saying dad is being bad by taking a day off to play video games are being silly. It’s an event that probably doesn’t happen often and maybe he is getting paid for it (there are events like that) or maybe he just also needs a day to relax. His wife seems to be fine with it so idk what the big deal is imho. I’m sure dad helps in other ways on other days. Just do your job like you would any other mon-fri job. If you had a work place with a company, you wouldn’t go to work because your store manager was there and you think since he’s there he can do your work. Just get over it and do your work, otherwise you could lose your job, and your income, and most importantly your friend.

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And alot of people work from home expecially these days and still have a babysitter that comes in and takes care if kids

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Notice how in the first half… “I told my friend MY FIANCÉ was not happy that I’m still required to come over” then at the end she asks if THEY have the right to be upset.

You’re fiancé sounds super controlling and insecure. Your jobs your job. I’ve worked with 90% men at a job and not once did my husband say anything about working with or around men. I’d tell him to get over it. If you can’t be trusted now then I wouldn’t marry the guy.

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What the parents are doing with their time when you’re working is none of your business.

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Ridiculous!! It’s your job!!

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Ok it’s the same if your friends was kn a zoom calll ya they are home but they are paying you to watch their kid he has no right to say anything

Did you give your fiancé to be worried about being with your friends husband or Is your fiancé normally worried about you spending time with your guy friends? If he is jealous like that don’t marry him, he will be that way always.

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If it’s out of jealousy because he doesn’t want you alone with another man I’d consider that a huge red flag and I wouldn’t even marry the man.

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You’re getting paid to do a job. That job is to take care of the kid.

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Well… you said it’s your JOB :woman_shrugging:t2: I wish I got to pick and choose if I wanted to work or not based on the number of employees my JOB has there that day.

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You’re getting paid to do the same job to help the friend regardless of what their plans are or if theyre home. If it is an issues with you around another guy alone…you and your spouse need to work those trust issues out.
I do the same, babysit for a friend and more times than not the dad has been more than capable of watching said kids…but it doesnt bother me bc im gettin paid either way 🤷

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Just be direct and tell them how you feel OR be a good friend and help your friends out. Either way, it’s your call. Be an adult and figure it out.

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Tell your fiance to go with you to their house for the day. Problem solved

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Go to your job. If husband makes you uncomfortable tell him so. Pack kid up and take to your home.

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You and your fiance are overreacting here in my opinion. Unless of course something has happened with your friends husband that makes you feel uncomfortable? Never ignore your gut instincts if you feel something is off about your friends husband. But other than that, if you never had a weird feeling about him, and this is about making your fiance feel respected then yes you’re both overreacting

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Yes you’re both being ridiculous. Also you say she’s your friend you can’t help her out? I love when I get opportunities to go hang out with my friend even if it’s just to take her to an appt and their child to school. Your fiance is whack and you don’t sound like a very good friend if you’re upset that she’s still asking for you to help even tho her husband will be home… doing something he enjoys

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That was a very quick switch from “I” to “we”. Its almost like you entirely lost your autonomy and became his property at the mere mention of being around another adult human male.
Dump his ass, FAST.

If this is falling on Christmas Eve I would be upset too. If a parent is home you shouldn’t have to babysit. I don’t think it’s ridiculous for someone to want you to be home with your own family for the holidays.

If you’re getting paid, it shouldn’t matter!

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Over reacting by far. People do jobs all the time if a boss is there or not. Same thing. It’s a work day. Sounds like fiance is not trusting of you or your friends husband. Maybe that should be addressed before marriage.

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Unless you have had issues with the husband, I see no reason why you wouldn’t babysit. I appreciate your husband being mindful of the situation but on the surface it seems controlling or unreasonable jealous. ONLY you know.his motives.

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Regardless of what your fiancé thinks, I would be uncomfortable having the parent there while I take care of their child whether it’s the mom or the dad. To me it’s just awkward :woman_shrugging:t2:

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Yes, u are overreacting

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Are you getting paid?! If so, then it doesn’t matter WHAT they’re doing. And your “fiancé” should have no say in your work hours. You’re an adult. He wouldn’t be voicing his opinion to a regular employer and he shouldn’t now either.

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Without trust, your upcoming marriage is doomed.

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He is a controlling ass. that is a HUGE red flag!!! He has no right to be upset and you need to be very cautious going forward

If your getting paid and normally would be there during those times idk why is a big deal

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Why is he upset. Is he jealous. It’s ur job I assume so why would it matter. The dad will be home but he’s got something g to do it sounds like. Why would this matter married it not.

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I once had a babysitting job where the dad was home all day every day. But he was a lazy bum that couldn’t be trusted to take care of anyone but himself. But even if a parent is home while I’m sitting doesn’t mean that they’re lazy. Sometimes you have things you need to do at home and still need help. My mil has watched my kids so I could clean, crochet, and once so I could just take some alone time. I’m not saying you should babysit in this case, especially if you’re uncomfortable. But it isn’t that unusual to need a sitter while you’re home.

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I loved babysitting when the parents were home it gives you a chance to get to know them better