The ex wife has nothing to say? Maybe he did pay ? I mean if you skip doesnt domestic get involved? Somethings missing
The silence is your answer. And the children already figured it out. No need to handle anything. It will handle itself. You and your husband have done your parts. Tell her donât be mad when the kids resent her for what she did, and they donât bring the grandkids around. 
karma will work itâs self out
3 Likes
So why is it your battle⌠Eehhhh
1 Like
Present the kids with receipts, then tell them perhaps they should have a talk with their mother.
6 Likes
When we got my step-son at 14, he always said his mom told him that his dad didnât pay his child support, so my husband at the time got a statement from the attorney General for every single payment since day one. Proof.
Get a print out of the closed case to show he fulfilled his obligation.
If the kids are grown and they are your husbandâs with another woman. I would just let it be. Why does it matter?
3 Likes
His bank records will show he made payments. Get him to show the kids a couple
5 Likes
Why are grown kids caring about this first? Like⌠If it didnât affect relationships growing up who gives a shit now?
If you have proof Iâd just tell ex wife she can clarify with grown kids or you can show em the proof and she can look like lying asshole
6 Likes
Thatâs between the adults. None of the kids business. If they had arrangements for each child to be taken care of then thatâs that. You stay out of it
3 Likes
Find the records and prove the child support was paid.
6 Likes
Who cares⌠the children are grown now⌠move forward 
7 Likes
The proof of the pudding is in the eating, if this man was not paying child support why would the ex be at all the family gathering while her children were growing up. I would tell my husband to tell his ex to prove that he never paid child support.
Agree with all of the above mostly ! Definitely get it in black and white, maybe she canât afford anything now with no extra moneyâŚâŚ itâs easy enough just to blame the other parent.
Simply clear the air with them, and donât run her down to them either. Just explain a mis understanding
Sheâs a liar. Iâve seen this first hand. Simple ignore her, donât even address her. Just show the proof to your bonus children that he did pay and let them deal with her.
5 Likes
Go get the paper work to show the kids. If it was paid no issue problem gone⌠If not stop fucking with the ex considering the kids are now adults
6 Likes
what does your husband say to this accusation?
1 Like
If his kids believe it, tell them to check with child support, itâs on record.
What does this have anything to do with you??
2 Likes
Not your business. Let your ex-husband deal with that with the kids and the ex-wife
2 Likes
The issue is your husband and his exâs problem. He needs to deal with it , not you. You can support your husband and stand behind him when he takes on the matter and correct it. If he chooses to. That seems to be the biggest question in my mind, Why hadnât he done something about it the first time.?
Clearly he didnât the first time this conversation was had with you. Since there has been a follow up conversation years later. (There is no mention that your husband was even aware of these accusations by his children. If so then the kids would be holding him accountable and not making you be the one to âfixâ the issue)
It is sad the grown children felt the need to bring you into the situation. They are grown. Its over and done with.
Unless the ex is bringing up old wounds to the kids to cause some drama. 
Tell them who cares. That is in the past.
Stop trying to point fingers. Life is about more than who paid a bill.
Bow out of this one. If they want information, they need to ask the horsesass.
2 Likes
So the ex wife lied to the kids all those years, letting them believe dad wasnât paying any child support, when in fact he was & she was pocketing the money for herself, so they grew up with all this resentment for dad, & now brave enough to confront him. Get the proof of the payments & sit them down & show them whoâs really been screwing them over all those years
So your saying his kids are now asking why your ex never paid child support. What the hell is it any of their business . And are they worried it shorted their ass a payment or that their dad had to help financially raise your children.? Idk to me itâs none of their business and the ex is stirring the pot sounds like. And how would they even know that he never paid if one of yâall hadnât told her. You get comfortable with her and talk to much and it comes back and bites you in the ass. An ex is an ex for a reason .But respect you for including her. And making the kids feelings top priority. Thatâs what itâs about. But donât be so eager to tell personal business .
His children are greedyâŚ
First I think this is your husbandâs responsibility. Keep it simple. Have him tell them heâs sorry that theyâre upset, but there seems to be some misinformation. Tell them heâs always paid his support and that they will need to go back and talk to their mother.
5 Likes
The kids are grown. They have a right to know. And if I were you I would show them proof and watch the lies unravel. Itâs disgusting when moms lie to their kids about stuff like that just to get a one up on their dad. I have a younger sister that got adopted out when we were young and it wasnât by choice and when she came to visit our mom and gma she legitimately thought our mom had died in a car accident. Her new parents had told her that. So honestly I would tell them the truth. You donât need to go after the mother yourself. But I would show the kids proof. And since they are adults let them make the decision on what they wanna do about it. And if your husband wants to say something about it to her, let him.
Alot of people are saying stay out of it. I understand if you think he should hold his responsibilities of having a child and should of paid. And you do have a right to know if yall were married and he was suppose to be paying child support if he didnât you have a right to know where that money went. Along with âleaving it aloneâ the kids might think bad of their father if the mother is lying. Have him show you a couple of bank statements or if you can get a hold of the case file to know if he did or not.
That was between the parents. That was then and this is now If the kids were raised and supported/ taken care of it shouldnât matter now. If they were or werenât itâs something the parents should take care of -not the kidsâŚ
1 Like
Are the adult kidâs expecting money?! Weâre they fed, clothed had a roof over their heads as children? Then they need to stfu. Plus it isnât your business to confront the ex⌠itâs his.
Not your problem. Better remain out of this issue.
1 Like
Is there no documentation of cs being paid. Paperwork from the state, cancelled checks or money orders?
Contact an attorney. Your children deserve child support.
Not worth it, just disengageâŚ
1 Like
If he paid, it should be documentation about. Let the kids confront their own mother
7 Likes
Child support is given to take care of the childrensâ needs, i.e. roof over their head, clothing, school, food, etc. They may think there was none because it wasnât given directly to them to spend as they wish.
9 Likes
How you handle it is the same way you handle everything else that involved the kids. You do a family gathering a cookout/bbq and invite the ex wife and the kids and you sit them down and you ask the husband to explain to the kids but I would do it after the dinner or donât even need to do a dinner just invite them over and talk about it
4 Likes
The grown âkidsâ should be asking their parents I donât think itâs any of ur matter to be bothered abt it & quit be friends with his ex I would never have agreed in the first place that she have allowance in ur future life. Let her & ur hubby work their own shit out. It seems U tread on eggshells with him & his past baggage snap out of it.
1 Like
Just check you bank statements. Follow the paper trailâŚ
Hubby needs to take situation to court. It Einstein get resolved othrrwise.
so youâve been married to this man for 30 years⌠that means his children with his ex wife were born prior to that. why are 30year old + adults asking about child support that their father paid decades ago? tell them kids to move on and its done and over with. its up to their mother to explain that. if the courts say its paid off⌠its been paid off.
8 Likes
I was in a situation where my boyfriend paid child support for two boys. The oldest, who was 11 at the time, asked his dad why he didnât get child support. He told him he paid every month. His son said he didnât get any of it. I asked the son if he had a place to live, food to eat, clothes to wear and he said yes. I told him the child support is to help raise you, not for you to get toys. He said âoh, I thought I was suppose to get the money.â In the case of the poster here, the children are a bit old to be concerned about child support more than 30 years ago. Their mom must have told them he didnât payđ¤ˇ
If it was paid through the court they have a record of the payments ! Obtain one as your proof !
1 Like
My ex never paid even one cent of child support. Let it go. It is what it is. He let his kids down. It is not your job to cover it up or make excuses
1 Like
Iâd step away & tell them to ask their father.
Maybe ask them why they think they arenât being financially supported? Perhaps the ex wife is bitching to her children telling them he doesnât do anything for them or because the money isnât going directly to them they donât quite understand what it is heâs paying them specifically, for support.
I bet they asked her for money and she gave this excuse as to why she canât give them money, otherwise why would the children even care? I literally cannot think of any reason they would do this or why they would even question it at all.
11 Likes
Iâd say yes, and she kept the money for herself. Tell the kids, show proof if you have it.
Iâd like to think if he wasnât paying and owed child support that youâd know from his ex or the Courts. How did he make payments, he can show you and his kids proof of payment.
1 Like
Show the payments made.
14 Likes
Just keep living, some situations donât need an explanation. As children grow and life happens things tend to make more sense when they start experiencing similar things.
2 Likes
Uh leave it be? Stop letting it bother you.
2 Likes
So she lied to their children that he never paid support is that what Iâm reading?
3 Likes
Show the kids (who are now adults) the payments made over the years.
11 Likes
Is there any paperwork that can show she got it
8 Likes
I would just tell them thatâs a question for their mom to answer but that their dad did pay it. And then leave it at that. 
I wouldnât get into it.
8 Likes
It sounds like youâre trying to find something to be mad about. Let it be. Honestly it sounds like the ex is lying though.
4 Likes
Show them proof. Send it to the ex wife as well. That will shut them all up!
Call up child support and get a print out of what he owes which would be zero im sure u can prove to the kids it was paid.
4 Likes
He should be able to get proof of what hes paid to show them
Iâd show the kids the payments and the parties where she was. She is being a witch
Show them the court order that terminates the child support. That would also show any balances due - which should be zero. Give them facts, not emotional answers and let them do with it what they will. She will make her bed and the kids will realize it at some point.
17 Likes
Easy peasy lemon squeezy
You can contact the child support center and give them the case number and ask for all paperwork and letter stating obligation was meet and it will give dates and amounts plus show it was paid in full and then show the adult CHILDREN 
6 Likes
Refer them to their father.
3 Likes
My husbandâs ex wife was a money hungry c**t she lied to
My husband when their son went into the millitary saying he owed on his car she kept most of the money and my husband was a pussy about it cuz it was for his son even tho she took a the money n kept it for her own self. People r disgusting
That sounds incredibly frustrating, but an easy problem to solve. Not sure how childsupport went then, but now thereâs a very good paper trail. Itâs unfortunate to have children in the middle of strife.
1 Like
The courts have a really nice report that shows every payment. Itâs time to get it, make copies and when asked you just hand them a copy and move the conversation to something different
12 Likes
Lose. Your. Cool. U. Deserve this much pick. Your battles. And. This. Is. One. Iâd. Pick
1 Like
s lying But like Kim says theresalways a paper trail
1 Like
My husbands ex also tells their kids that he doesnât pay child support and never has but we get the letters in the mail of how much he has to pay and when itâs due so I have proof of who the lying a**hole is . If he paid, there should be proof.
Why are they asking you in the first place? Theyâre grown ask their Dad if their Mom is lying.
7 Likes
Dont stress about it. They probably asked her for money & she said something like well if your dad paid child support. My husbands ex wife does this to his kids all the time. Shes constantly telling his family he never pays her money he pays 700 a month. Only time she didnt get money is when he was laid off. Its so annoying.
3 Likes
You should have documentation to prove it was paid. Show the kids that.
4 Likes
Contact Child Support and ask for paperwork on his payments.
3 Likes
Honestly I would just get the papers from child support office present to the children and let them make their own decisions. They are old enough to do so. So let them deal with the dirty work not you. Just give them the black and white papers
6 Likes
As a child of divorce, and being a divorced parent myself, receiving child support, I would SHOW them proof of the support paid. F*CK the pussyfooting around with the mother of asking why. She will give you every excuse AND just continue to lie about it!! Sounds like youâre looking for drama and a fight. Let it go mama!! Always remember- the proof is in the pudding! 
Show the kids where he made the payments and let them decided where to go from there and leave it alone.
6 Likes
There should be a paper trail showing every payment he made through ORS.
1 Like
Let the past go and move on. Every one is grown up now. Let the kids do their own research and find the answers for themselves. I donât understand why the ex is involved in your life at all. People lie all the time. You know the truth. Let it go.
4 Likes
Had the same situation with my stepkids, until they found all the money order receipts for their daddyâs paid in child support, never missed a month, first bill taken out. Momma was blowing the money on her a good time telling the kids daddy wasnât paying his child support. Get copies where he paid it in and show them
1 Like
All you Gotta do is pull out paperwork that says he paid it off!!! Trust me⌠thatâll shut everyone up!
I had to do it and it shut everyone up!!!
6 Likes
Just tell them you paid it and leave it at that.
2 Likes
You get proof and show them. Did he pay through domestic relations or child support facility? None the matter Iâm sure yâall wouldâve kept a paper trail or record of some sort. Show them
Why would it matter. If the mom used support for the kids? What does dad tell them?
1 Like
My ex husband said he was paying child support and after I kicked him out I found out that he hadnât been. He also said she had been the one that cheated but I found out he was the cheater. If your husband really was paying child support then just show them the proof.
Whats not to say the âkidsâ wanted something and mom said they didnât have money because dad wasnât paying and she was just using it for something else? I mean to me that would explain why sheâs avoiding it.
Why are you fuming it wasnât your obligation let your husband deal with his children on that issue.
7 Likes
She the adult kids the proof
There should be evidence of his payments. Print it and show the kids. Let them handle it from there.
9 Likes
Itâs none of his kids business. Tell them donât ask anything about a household they didnât pay bills in it. But if you still want to collect yours you can still pursue it.
1 Like
I donât know what state this is in. But here in MN all you need is the case number and you can access all that info online. Saves you the hassle of calling the agency, and having them mailed.
3 Likes
You are fuming well tell your husband to explain to his kids that he paid his support. Oh and providing proof should end the conversation.
Go get the reports⌠make a copy for everyone asking and leave it at that. The proof is in the payments
You donât need to do anything about her. Show the kids it was paid. There is obvious proof. The will know their motherâs true colors after that.
Call child support get the proof that itâs been paid and case closed. Then you can prove to the kids everything was paid & whom ever they r getting the info from is lying
Shouldnât even really matter to you in the first place if your kids are all grown. If she chooses to lie to them then thatâs on her and has nothing to do with you, especially knowing your husband did his part to financially support them whether their mother lied to them or not.
1 Like
Do you have a proof that youâve paid it? Just show it to them.
Theyđaređgrownđafđ.
Let it go and donât worry yourself with things of the past!
1 Like