I had to do the same, its the hardest thing you will do. But you will be thankful you did years to come. And so will she. And I was just like her my self, and led a very hard life. Thank God for my mother praying. It will work out. You have to let her live. Or she will get worse. She is running but she will hit a brick wall. Then she will need you. Praying for you. I’m typing this from my husband’s Facebook
She’s 14, she’s not even old enough to get a job to support herself. You’re still her mother. This is a good way of stating that you are throwing in the towel.
You’re the parent and need to take action by discipline. Change her environment, and both of you get counseling together.
Kick her out, she’ll be back but know she may not be back for a long time and during that time she will probably end up doing more and harder drugs and getting into trouble… I’d say see if you can get her help… 14 is too young…
As crazy as it may sound - take her to an AA or Al-Anon meeting. See where drug addiction and abuse can lead her. She’ll hear a strong message from those who have dealt with the consequences.
Take her on a little field trip to a respiratory unit. Be sure the nurses can introduce you to people with tracheostomies, those that must be suctioned, those who have cardiovascular problems etc. Most people with illnesses from smoking often volunteer to let teens visit. Good luck.
I know what you r going through. Tough Love. The teens no a days have no respect for anyone they have to learn.
The ONLY thing you ‘owe’ her is a place to sleep, food, and basic clothing. No phone, no rides, NOTHING EXTRA. Stick to it
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Well there is definitely an underlying problem here,and the fact that it is to much of an effort for you to figure that out and find a way to help her.you should think of improving your own attitude and mothering skills…
I am currently going through the exact same thing with my twins boys 15.I have 5 teens and I’ve always told them from the get go if they chose to smoke and what not that they must support there own habit(I will not buy)they must be working,going to school with good grades,and pay their way around the house…I got a lot of judgment from family because of this but there’s no right way about parenting at the end of the day kids are going to make their own choices I was just glad that they were able and still can come and talk to me about anything…
My kids are a lot younger but I know a LOT of people who smoked at that age who have grown up to be successful adults. Just be there for her. Kicking her out isn’t going to stop the behavior, if anything it will just get worse.
Not there yet but heres my 2 cents. Take away everything except essentials no tv no phone clean out her room and put her mattress on the floor take the door off its hinges. Explain you love her but if she doesn’t follow the rules she looses everything. Explain that you only have to feed her and provide shelter anything else is done out of love til she shows respect she has nothing.
Just don’t allow her to go and hang out with these friends. Make her switch schools if you have to. Don’t let her just go and run to these addicts. I’m surprised I didn’t become an addict myself. Instead I had good friends. Lucky me. Your daughter doesn’t sound too lucky. She’s in with the wrong crowd if you act like you don’t care she REALLY won’t care about herself. She looks to you on how to love herself.
You are 100% wrong. Take all her things away, take her door off her room. Put a lock on her window that she can’t sneak out of, you can set up cameras out side so you can catch her if she tries to sneak out. But if you are willing to kick out your 14 year old daughter then you really shouldn’t be a parent. There’s always ways to put kids in their place.
If all else fails…really I wish i had good advice. My son started drinking behind our backs at 15.
He is 31 right now. Tragically a full blown slcoholic.
Not easy…not at all.
Don’t give her any money.
Go buy her a pack of cigarettes, sit her down and make her smoke the whole damn pack, bet she won’t smoke after that!
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You are writing off your FOURTEEN YEAR OLD daughter for smoking?! My goodness! I started smoking when I was 11! I smoked for twenty five years before quitting. Holy hell. Yes. YOU ARE WRONG TO KICK YOUR 14 YEAR OLD OUT! Though - she may be better off elsewhere!
Thank God you’re not my mom!
She needs you more than ever to be there for her! She’s a kid at 14! We don’t run out and abandon who we love when they need help!
She’s 14 you can’t throw your child out that is neglect because she started smoking and doing teenage bullshit don’t fund it pack her a lunch for school ground her speak to the other children’s parents maybe they aren’t aware of what they are all doing maybe they are but don’t Throw her out she’s still a child and still learning
This sounds like a call for help/attention. Kicking her out is down right wrong. How about be proactive and get counseling or take her out and show her how homeless/drug addicts live. Cut her friends off
Wow I hope this mom got enough advice. As a recovered addict I can tell u with absolute certainty that if my parents did this at 14, I would’ve been dead or been put on the streets. If you don’t want to see your daughter again, then yes, kick her out. Love conquers addiction. It’s love! Love is the key. Not sure how she disrespected u but maybe she feels disrespected that she actually told you the truth about something and you literally kicked her out, btw it’s also illegal so there’s that. Please, love her, lover her through it all!!
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Shes 14! You are wrong. You are supposed to set example. whatever the situation. Talking goes a long way when you sit down and talk to them on their level.
I was a very strict parent but you just can’t win that battle, I would take the phone away for a month everytime I caught her. If you want her to have a phone for safety get her a go phone while the month is on. Everytime I found them I would destroy them and phone is gone for a month, no discussion. Just do it. Ultimately she may never stop, but your house your rules
She’s 14 sounds like she is trying to fit in… She need validation and attention she is too young remove outside interference… Electronics, unless necessary (monitored)
I would take that door off the hinges and she will get all the attention she seeks including attention she doesn’t seek …therapy as well sounds like there is more to this you got this you are not her friend you are her mother it’s your job…she may hate you now but it will pay off… Hang in there
My 14 YO is the same. He now has started stealing money from his father and myself. We have paid $2500 in tickets for him getting caught smoking and nothing works. We have tried to send him away but we know he is better here. Sadly you cannot stop them but start doing room.sweeps
I’ve raised 4 of my 7 so far… if smoking is the worst of it UR BLESSED!! you’re the parent… BE THAT. DON’T GIVE UP. chances are that’s what her friends parents have done. Don’t be that. Just be there for her. She’ll get thru this and and will you. She’s a teenager!
Send her to me in the Bahamas. She MUCH TO YOUNG to not listen and following friends. Some more serious punishment and let her know you mean what you say.
Sit and have a SERIOUS talk and let her talk. She’s rebelling for some reason
Fourteen is pretty young to put out. I know children today are so much different from my young days. There is so much out there to get into. Can you have her in some like canceling program. I’m so sorry for you. Just love her and keep talking to her.
She’s 14. You don’t kick out a 14 year old. You just prevent her from smoking by searching her belongings and grounding her. If she won’t stop smoking, she stays home. Get an alarm & camera system if she tends to sneak out.
Don’t over react . Let her know it’s nothing to be rebellious with , tell her the cons , the real cons not the -d.a.r.e cons … show her some burn outs . She’ll get through the phase , people are lacing things with all sorts of shit nowadays rather her tell u everything then nothing and well you find out yourself and it’s too late.
You are wrong . You are asking to loose your daughter to drugs, sex etc. As a parent of a daughter that age you have to hold her to responsibility. You have to win. Get a counselor that will allow a neutral space for you two to talk. Do whatever it takes to keep her home. Get in her business and know exactly what she is doing. Consequate her behavior for both good and bad behavior.
I started smoking around that age. I have since stopped as my dad died at 47 from lung cancer. When you watch someone firsthand slowly die, you rethink your actions. Smoke free almost 11 years. I hope your daughter sees that smoking is terrible soon.
Get her some help made at her school counselor and point both in a good direction don’t give up on her ur the adult she still a child !!! Prayers can over come anything put her in God’s hands
Honestly went through this for the last 2 years. Talk to her. I know it’s hard and believe me when I tell you it’s won’t get easier. Now I have a 16 year old and 2 more to go. Please don’t ask her to get out. Pray for her. Get her therapist.
Motherhood is neverending. You can stop to take a breath but you can’t throw your arms up and think you did all you could.
The love for your child should encourage you to teach them how survive and thrive but always in a positive way. They are the biggest investment you will ever have, take care of it.
How can you kick out a 14 year old… child neglect? Over smoking… way to make sure she can never trust you to tell you anything ever again. Her brain is developing. She can’t understand all you know. Her take from this will be you don’t love her. I’ve seen children who don’t feel love seek it out in the most toxic / damaging ways.
Yes you’re wrong. She’s 14. If you can’t stop her from smoking you can at least protect her from other things homelessness as a YOUTH brings …
These kids today r really tuff to deal with. They have little respect for ANYTHING or ANYONE. They lie to ur face, steal from u. You have a long road ahead of you. I will pray for you. Been there done that. You’ll end up being the jerk in her eyes. Sorry
I Deff wouldn’t kick her out because it will just push her closer to these friends. I would force her to look at pictures of what smoking and drugs do. I would have her take up more responsibility since she wants to act like an adult.
You do NOT kick your 14 year old out! You’re giving up on her. How is she getting access to drugs and why is she allowed to leave the house at 14?
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So wrong, she is struggling at a very pivotal point in her life. There are other way. Try one of those. One that won’t push her to give up on life. Deep down she wants you to help her, she just needs to admit that to herself.
Don’t throw her out if you do she tell the police that you will go to jail! Keep her little but at home! She wanna be hard headed let her little butt learn the hard way! Trust me she go come running home crying when she can’t take them streets no more!! Try getting her help keep her away from them kid’s!! My mom and dad always told me when kid wanna be hard headed don’t wanna listen wanna be grown! Them streets go scare the hell outta you! You come running back home to momma!!
You have to stand your ground as a parent , don’t kick her out she thinks she’s older but she is a child , love , pray , and my opinion is you have to stand your ground early or they will run all over you…
I sure did use tough love throughout my boys teenage years .
Sink or swim believe me they swam .
They are marvelous adult human beings and contributors to society now .
The worst happened I fought it and this was the best thing for our situation but 14 is little yet unless your and her relationship is abusive .Then you need to put her in kids home .She will have social workers take care of her every need .
Believe me they get tired of that real quick .
No don’t kick her out. Ok she’s smoking …but there are far worse things in life. Try to talk to her and be there for her. She will understand one day, and she will eventually stop. I also smoked to look cool at first, then I got hooked. But I eventually stopped…and she might to. Please out there she will struggle and might end up doing drugs or worse…protect your child and show her love. Just cause she is maybe getting on your nerves…don’t forget she once was your little baby. It’s heartbreaking for a mother to give up on her child. Be her support system, get counselling …Nd most important keep telling her you love her, hug her…and never stop being her mother. She will come around, teenage years are very very hard, you might want to shout at her from inside but go down to her level…she is not an adult even though she pretends to be… hormones are raging and going through many uncertainties …don’t add more stress…just keep loving her …but don’t kick her out…this can be a cruel unforgiving world and it is your duty to protect her.
My parents kicked me out and tried to teach me tough love. I’m ok now, but I slept in the streets, starved, stole for food. I went through things and the thi gas that some people thought was ok to do to me is unforgettable. If my parents knew what happened they probably wouldn’t believe me. She is 14. Do not throw her out! Punish her till she hates you. But for the love of god , you dont know whata out there.
A lot of people don’t understand that not all children are the same. What works for you and your children might not work for others. If you truly feel like nothing is working and she has no care in the world about her life whatsoever, then do what you have to do momma. If you feel like she just needs someone she can trust to talk to, then get her some help. Do you know any of her friends parents? Can you speak with them if you do? She could just be doing it to impress friends and feel cool. Maybe if you even sit down with her and try to understand her point of view. Ask her why does she like it? How does it make her feel? Just simple questions to try to understand why she wants to smoke will probably help her feel closer to you. I wish you much luck!!!
I found out my son was smoking when he was 17. He admitted it to me when I him about smellng like cigs. Guess he’d been smoking off and on since he was 16. Getting smokes from friends who smoked. Most his friends don’t smoke any more.
He knows how I feel about it, and what my father went through with his smoking habit. He’s 23 and still smokes. He talks about quitting. Hopefully someday he will.
My sister and I both smoked when we were younger. She was 14, and I was 16. I only smoked for a year, and she smoked until she was 19. We’re both in our late 40s now.
You’ve let her know how you feel about it, and the consequences of those choices. All you can do is not give her money for it, keep the line of communication open, and hope she’ll eventually quit.
14 is a tough age. I butted heads with my mom until I was 17. Best of luck.
You are wrong. She is under 18 she is still YOUR responsibility. At least she is being honest with you. Maybe ask her why. There is a deeper reason then all my friends are. Talk to her
Go talk to her friends parents get to know them and see if they will help by controlling their children as well. Maybe they are lost and need help too.
My son will be 9 and doesn’t listen to a word I say. I looked into military school but there is no way in hell I can afford that. Idk what to do either.
Wow your really trying to make her feel abandoned and hopless at 14 shes a child… a little kid… Hell I did way way worse as a kid and teen my mom helped me threw it and thats one thing I know I can always trust her to be there and to help me if I need it and guess what as and adult I’ve been on the right path and have a beautiful family because of it if she would have kicked me out (witch you can not kick a 14 yr old out that is child neglect and abuse ) I would have been dead a long long time ago if she wouldn’t have helped me and been there to pull me out from the darkness of my own heart I truly believe I would not be alive today
Shit I was exactly in this spot before the first lockdown, with the support of my family somehow I managed to shape her back a little bit into her old self before she met 5he wrong group of people, it’s very hard to deal with but being MUM you have to do it somehow. She’s not 100% the same but she is back in school (college) and for that I’m proud of her. Kicking her out is definitely not the best thing to do specially just for smoking, she’s a growing teen, just talk with her in a way you will see eye to eye. You can do it Mama❤️
Well I was that girl at 14. My parents tried everything and I always found cigarettes. I wasn’t disrespectful or a super rebel. I didn’t get into drugs. Yet here I sit at 48 years old still smoking and both of my parents had emphysema and COPD. I really don’t know what to tell you. 
Yes, making her pack her bags isn’t going to stop her going down the wrong path. You’re just nudging her that way. Maybe sending her to live with a stricter grandparent would be better. Or just try getting closer to her and spending more time with her. Leave less time for her to hang out with the bad crowd.
My daughter has smoked and snuck liquor and is dating a boy who says he’s in a gang she has ran away over five times where I have chased her down she ran away again three days ago I have nomore energy to chase her. She’s 15 and has torn down all the drywall in her room hitting it and broken the windows and many other things.
Kicking her out? Definitely too far, you are in charge not her but I’m sure this is not worth losing your daughter, whilst also sending her down the wrong path! Fill a jar with water break cigarettes into it, the more the better and put a lid on it. Then make her smell it every bloody morning! She won’t want to smell like that! 
Welcome to the teen years. Time to work on those listening and empathy skills. If they feel heard, sometimes they will listen. Rephrasing something they say after they say it makes them feel like you listened. Don’t bet on it though. Teens are head strong.
When I took up smoking as a teen about 40 years ago, my Mom took a different approach. She decided she would rather I smoke cigarettes in front of her than wonder what else I might be smoking. I still smoke so it wasn’t effective at stopping it. It did reduce the amount of conflict in our home and forty years ago, it wasn’t as verboten (forbidden).
It has become so socially unacceptable today that the only place I’ll smoke is in my own home. I’m unsure why there is a resurgence with our teens.
I think the most effective approach would be to take her to visit folks who have smoked for a long time. It might be difficult to find places you can take her especially with the COVID crap but seeing someone like my Aunt Rose who has to drag around an oxygen tank or someone who has lost half their jaw from smoking and hearing them speak about the costs might work.
Maybe make her volunteer at a nursing home for a bit. She’s bound to run into someone who bore the brunt of smoking’s damage.
I don’t think I’d further damage your relationship with her by tossing her out. Support not animosity is more likely to get a positive outcome. If you have a lot less influence then her smoking friends by default have more.
She is your responsibility! Ground her until she wants to act right! You both may need some counseling! Good luck
I would nip it in the bud and involve the cops, if not you’re going to get in trouble and will lead to her being put in a children’s home for bad behavior. If your talks aren’t helping. I seen other post with the same advice and agree 
.
I’m not a parent, however, I left home at 15 and my life was completely messed up because of it. Im 36 now and just starting to get where i want to be. The horrible stuff that I’ve witnessed and gone through could have all been avoided. Drugs, sex trafficking, being held hostage amongst many other messed up situations could have all been avoided if i was at home where i should have been. Shes still a child, and teenagers often rebel, so maybe try taking away privileges or other forms of discipline instead? Like I said I’m not a parent, but kicking her out is the last thing you want to do. This was over 20 years ago for me and the world is much more evil now than it ever has been. Just my opinion.
Don’t kick her out
In the end teens will usually do what they want
Just make it difficult for her to carry on
Stop giving her money
As you can’t afford to pay for bad habits
Tell her friends parents what you know and they can also stop giving money
Over smoking cigarettes??? I started when I was 13. When I told my parents they said “don’t ever do it around us and don’t ever ask us to buy them for you.” And I was grounded for a couple of weeks. Kicking her out is VERY extreme. That’ll be the push that will push her to drugs and shit. You can’t even find a good full time job at 14 so this is just cruel and setting her up for failure. I now have 2 daughters of my own!! You may not always agree with their choices but that’s just life! Communication is such a huge thing!
My daughter is 16. Has her drivers license and a debit card. I just saw a $65 charge on her debit card for a vape shop. I smoke and tell her all the time it’s my only regret in my life was picking up that first cigarette. I took away her truck and said if she can afford to buy vapes she can afford her own gas and insurance. Besides all the lecturing I told her she is going to make her own decisions in life and I can only teach her my mistakes and regrets. Sure all the kids are doing it does that mean she will do other drugs too?? I have taken away her privileges and am hoping she will make the right choices😪
Cringe. Like fucking yikes. You don’t give up on your kid. Who abandons a CHILD. Seperate her from the situation. Give her something healthy to build her up. Instead of telling her how horrible she is tell her how she deserves more. Im guessing she needs counseling from mental abuse at this point.
Sounds like family counseling would be beneficial to you both. You seem stressed and want to give up easily. Kids that age are challenging. It is their job to challenge your authority and boundaries. It is our job as parents to draw the line in the sand and not let them take over.
Kicking her out is leading her on the path to get worse, clap clap for being g a great parent. Maybe if you spend more time saying, you are your own person, capable of making your own decisions but let me educate you on some things first so you know what you would like to do, instead of don’t do this, don’t do that, I am your master! you wouldn’t be in this situation
Yes you’re wrong for kicking your daughter out… and I’m pretty sure that’s illegal too? Kicking her out certainly isn’t going to solve a damn thing.
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Yes you’re wrong. You cannot make your 14 year old daughter pack her bags. Talk with her, not at her. Make her understand why it’s not ok to smoke, especially at her age. Ultimately she’ll do whatever she wants. You can’t monitor her 24/7. I feel convincing is easier than demanding. Whatever happens, keep your chin up momma. This parenting shit is hard.
Don’t kick her out she is only 14 you need to be there for your daughter no matter what %. Its a hard one I know I have 4 kids and 3 are teens 18 yr, 14yr and 13yr and 6 yr and I always talk to my kids all day every day and sometimes they make my head spin 
stay strong for your girl.
Ummm… What i hope I don’t get to much hate for writing this but she’s your daughter control her… I mean do not let her leave the house ground her ass to her room then she will have no choice but to listen to you it’s that simple you are her parents how did it even get to the point where she was able to start in the first place I don’t understand how parents no offence to you in your position to each there own but why at such a young age was she out with out supervision I mean it doesn’t make sense to me shes a child still
Kicking her out at 14 is wrong regardless of what she did or is doing.
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Don’t through her to the wolves . You must clear out a place and start on your knees talking about it to the Lord . Pray out loud and speak life over her . Speak from your heart positive words as though it were . 
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It is not even legal to kick her out. But that is not the solution for me. Dont give her mobile, internet, friends for sometime. Take her to counselor and sit with her and talk. If anyone in your family is smoking, quit smoking or at least do not smoke in-front of her. Daughters are precious.
You be there for her no matter what or how you feel yes you tell her how you feel about it but that’s what she needs not for you to abandon her kids need and want boundaries not to say they need them the best thing you can do for her is sit her down and tell her how much you love her and that all this hurts you and it will hurt her ask her what’s wrong and actually listen to her and tell her no matter what the two of you will work this out together no matter what
It sounds like she needs new friends. If they all go to the same school, I would inform the school of the smoking habit and transfer her out. She’s going to want to fit in with her friends as long as she’s with them, that’s just human nature, especially during teen years.
If you kick her out she likley rebels further as others have mentioned ground her , take away electrics etc … if she wants to smoke nothing you do will stop that but don’t aid it ! , we all went through difficult stages pushing our limits etc … throw her out and she will not definitely but will more likley turn to drink & illegal drugs she needs her mum and family !
You cant pack her bags and ship her on. If her group is as dangerous as your saying and taking all sorts too… if she leaves yours and becomes dependant on drugs you could lose her forever. She could become that dependant she will start to steal and not pay her Bill’s etc and become homeless.
Is there a drugs/smoking rehability program near you where she could get an insight into what could be down her path if she does what shes doing?
Or like others have said is get a full packet and make her smoke the whole pack and try that way to put her off
Or cut her money and give her packed lunch for school.
There is also educational people that also visit local schools etc to show what effect smoke has on your lungs. I worked in a secondary school in northern ireland and they actually had real lungs with them showing their function and the comparison in one effected and one not etc also chatted over tbe effects on your mental state, well being and life long effects.
Also showing what you could have in life if you didnt have the expense of cigarettes.
Like they would say if you spent £8 3 times a week let’s say as shes 14 hopefully not smoking a pack a day. So that’s £24 a week ££96 a month £1152 a year. This comparison worked really well especially for the boys. They could have a wee car when their 17 with that money or a holiday with their friends etc
Is it cigarettes or pot? Cus honestly pot had more benefits than drawbacks. But honestly as other comments have pointed out there’s something going on with an underlying issue. She could be bored in need of mental stimulation, something could have happened to her that you’re not aware of. There’s also a possibility she’s just getting involved with the wrong type of people
I started smoking at 14…I turn 40 tmrw and wish I had never started. It’s expensive, it smells, it doesn’t even taste good. Been seriously considering quitting…again.
Have lost 2 loved ones to lung cancer, who smoked most of their lives.
Go buy her a pack of cigarettes. Tell her if she wants to smoke, she has to sit and smoke the entire pack, one after the other. She will get sick. Maybe that will work?
Kicking her out? That’s your child. You’re responsible for her for 4 more years. Don’t give up on her over cigarettes! Or she will continue to experiment…
I’m sorry y’all I’m from the south and our parents cut us no slack! Take the phone, laptop,
Turn off the WiFi, restrict her to her room until she comes around to your way of thinking and bust her ass when she is disrespectful!!
Let her smoke but not in your home or outside your home and she needs to earn money to buy them. Dont talk about chucking her out ask her why she decided to smoke. Dont talk about side effects as she probably knows that and wont want to hear. When my parents told me I couldn’t do something, I would do it. Support her perhaps she is struggling with peer pressure or just being a bitch but you wont find out by making threats to her. xx
That is against the law to abandon your child. Not only is it sad. You are the one person in the whole world, who should always be the safe place. Seek help and support. Behavior is communication. No one wants to feel out of control.
I would remove her from those friends. It’s illegal so there is always the scared straight method. She wants to be an adult and make her own decision? Then allow her to see what happens to adults that do illegal things. Myself? Military or girls catholic school but 
Hmmm… I am gonna go out on a limb here and say it’s illegal to kick her out at 14. Definitely not the way to go. There are so many options other than that. But let’s also face reality. Unless you start home schooling her and grounding her until she is 18 with a lock on the doors and windows, kids are gonna do what they want. I was the same way. And I didn’t need to be kicked out because I ran away all the time. It didn’t stop me. Nothing did or would have. What you CAN do is 1)Talk to her 2) Try and educate her on the dangers of smoking 3) Not allow it in your home at all. 4) I believe it’s illegal for 14 years olds to have smoking materials and paraphernalia. Call the police if you must.
She smoked a cigarette and you are going to make her homeless at 14? She can’t even go get a job to pay a bill?! I’d say that’s way over the top. Yes, she deserves punishment for smoking, but homelessness isn’t a punishment.
Well tell her if she does not follow the rules no driver license not sure if they still get at 16 and not sure how she is getting it is illegal to smoke under 18
I think you are making a big mistake I understand teenagers can be hard work but not knowing where she is who she is with would be far more stressful in my opinion set boundaries if she breaks them make consequences take her phone iPad ect but please don’t put her out on the streets she’s a child 
xx
The more you tell her what to do the more she is going to rebel. Give her examples of your choices when you were her age. Educate her on smoking but ultimately it is her decision.
Difficult to know what to do…based on each individual child. Maybe just don’t give her money, make her get a job and don’t pay her cellphone, clothes etc…
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Just Eliminate her opportunities to do so… school & Home only. Kicking her out would def only make it worse & you’d both prob end up hating each other.
She’s 14. She can’t easily get a job. She can’t drive. She can’t rent an apartment. You are setting her up to a. commit crimes to survive or b. find someone else to take care of her which is very dangerous. What you should do is find a rehab if you think she’s using drugs. Go to counseling as a family. Get her in a mentoring program. Have her join a club, a sport, something that she can spend her time on and make better friends. Giving up on your kid is not the answer.
Change school for her. Bring her to counselling expert. If she touch drug pls send her to drug patients center to stop it. Stop her school if necessary for a while till she not engaging on drug anymore.
I say your in the wrong. I did a lot of shit when I was as that age. Way worse then smoking and my mom never once kicked me out. But she grounded me, took things away. Didn’t give me any allowance anymore. If I wanted to act like an adult then I had to learn. She bought my necessities and want not like feminine products and hygiene stuff but that was it. It taught me respect. Instead of kicking her out you need to straighten her ass up and let her know you will not tolerate it.
Kids aren’t disposable, you don’t get to just throw them away when the going gets tough.
She 14 and there is a world of trouble out there
Let her do her Thang because how she going to afford it? Kicking her out won’t help but consequences are always there. Just let her know who’s boss if she has a attitude well let her ruin it for herself. No WiFi, no technology no nothing.
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Take her to see a hospice patient who’s dying from lung cancer as a result of smoking. If that doesn’t make her throw away any cigs, nothing will.
Where is she getting money for cigarettes? Thats where I would start. Then I would drug test her. And I would make sure that all her friends parents knew their kids were doing drugs.
I mean shes 14 so you obviously can’t kick her out or let her leave. Dont ler her go anywhere. If she flips or sneaks out… Call 911 amd have her mental health arresteem reach out for community support …
Gosh, sorry you’re going through this. She’s rebelling obviously. Kicking her out won’t make things better, might push her to worse things. She obviously knows her breath and hair will stink, her skin and teeth will get gross, so just tell her she needs to do this outside, pay for it herself and wash her own clothes. Maybe if you stop making fuss over it, she’ll eventually get over this phase.