I don’t blame him.He can be charged with distributing child pornography from those photos,he prob sent them to his bf smh 
I can’t believe you did that.I wouldn’t come home either that’s absolutely shocking that you did that
Well first, forcing him to come out of the closet is a hard no in any relationship and is traumatizing, and harmful.
Second 16 in college?
Third, gay work and straight world are very different in the realm of dating. While yes grooming occurs in both I think you went a bit too far
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Omg him taken pictures of his penis so very normal and your you get son seeing his brothers penis omg I’m sure his walked in on his brother and father , if he feels safe at his grandparents , better that he is safe better than on the streets as many gays get kicked out of home , taking his DS to the police, I wouldn’t be happy either at least talk to him or grandparents or father, might help to seek family counseling and join PFLAG
Ok so I dealt with a similar situation only my son was 17 and he went back to his abusive dad’s house and unfortunately as much as I totally understand the feelings you are going through you have to let him stay where he is and try to work on not letting it get you down. I know it totally sucks and I fell into a depression for a little while after it happened and my husband was so supportive and patient and would just hold me as I cried. But I realized that he is going to do what he wants at this stage in his life and all we can do is just be there when they need us. Just parent from a distance for now. He will eventually regret it or find out the hard way life is not sunshine and rainbows
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Pfft. He’s your kid. Doesn’t matter what anyone else here has to say. If you are concerned for his safety then at least SOMEONE is. He won’t realise until later that you just wanted to know he was SAFE & also that he wasn’t putting someone else’s child in a dangerous or unlawful situation. When he’s 18 then let him go but until then, show up, turn up, be the Mom, & make sure he’s aware of all the consequences. Also, it’s so irritating when family members become enablers in these sorts of situations instead of sending the child back to his/ her parent 
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Hes 16 years old and not an adult. He can’t tell you where he wants to live. You sound like you only want what’s best for him.
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You’re overstepping, if my mother was like this when I was 16 I’d probably be even worst of… but then again I had a baby when I was 16 
I guess everyone is different but if you expect to learn stuff from him you need to act like a friend & not so much a parent. He’s getting to the age now where he wants to be fairly treated like a grown up
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I have a 16yr old daughter who hasn’t been home in almost 2 months now. A horrible crazy messed up situation, so I understand.
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I think you went too far honestly. You’re trying to literally control him. His grandparents have every single right not to allow you in their home after all you’ve done. You should’ve never called the police. You also did force him to say he’s gay when he wasn’t ready and from the sounds of it you may actually be against it and that’s one reason he doesn’t want to come home. Even though you’re on the internet saying you’re okay with it doesn’t mean you truly are which is why your son is so upset and doesn’t want anything to do with you because he knows exactly how you are. Leave him alone for now like seriously leave him alone.
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If he’s 16 why haven’t you made him come home? Turning the DS over to police a little harsh but oh well you did it. But again 16 why isn’t he home. At 16 you can make him come back.
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First of all, if hes 16, you as mom
Call the shots. Not grandma. Dont let the tail wag the dog. If i had a dime for everytime my kids said “youre not my mom” id be rich. He needs to be under your roof to resolve things. Only you know what that may look like, counseling, authorities, etc. But he is YOUR child and you make the rules until hes 18. I unplug the internet at my house at 10. I dont care if they are talking to the pope. Kids that age need to be in bed. It has nothing to do with sexual orientation. Grandma needs to tell him to pack his stuff and go home. Stop letting the tail wag the dog. Bring your baby home and work with him to fix it. If he wont come. File unruly charges and let the judge tell him how its gonna be
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My mom did really invasive stuff like this to me growing up. It was extremely controlling and manipulative and I couldn’t take it anymore. She would go through my phone when I slept and read all convos I had with guys and stuff when I was like 17.
You crossed a lot of boundaries with your son and invaded his privacy. That’s humiliating that you brought up nudes he took on his own device. He’s 16…
You honestly need to just back off him more and let him be a teenager. He’s way too old for you to be grilling him about naked pictures your other son found.
Idk there’s so many red flags here I see that you say you’ve done. You’ve crossed a lot of lines in regards to his own privacy.
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Likely at 16 the police will not force him to move home. At least where I live nothing gets done. Small baby steps to try and fix this relationship, lots of SPACE and understanding and lots of COMMUNICATION when you get to that point. Hugs to you and your son.
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I’m wondering how many of these comments would be different if it was a 16 year old daughter taking/sending nude pics instead of a male…
Yet again this group continues to shock me. Talking about you violated his privacy by turning off the wifi YOU pay for at night and saying he shouldn’t send DI*K pics to strangers at 16. 
Y’all really are setting your kids up for unsafe internet practices.
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Turning off the internet was a logical decision.
After that you continued to cause damage to the relationship and you can’t undo it. I’d personally make it a requirement that to live with the grandparents he has to attend therapy. And teach your other kid to stay out of things that don’t belong to him. To respect other peoples privacy and boundaries. Bc without those skills he’s going to have himself a hard time. And if you thought your child was gay and were fine with it why you push and push until they were forced to put themselves before they were ready?!? That’s not being supportive or accepting. You assume he’s being groomed but did you even bother to check or did you just immediately assume your child would never want to send someone a dirty pic. Did you talk about how those types of pics at his age could cause him and you legal trouble? And that they could be leaked? Before you went to the police? You lost your son for actions and inactions. Don’t blame others for your stuff. Get into your therapy so you can process this situation with a licensed individual. Maybe they can help you learn to do better esp if you want to be an ally to your son as an adult. You have 2 years to start fixing this bc once he’s 18 he never has to see you again.
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Omg. My sister just broke up with her boyfriend because of his helicopter parents. He’s 18 and graduated and his mother is insane 
you took his DS to the police? That’s just the icing on the cake. How embarrassing.
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So let me just say coming out to your family especially your parents is hard! He may not have been ready to tell you yet! Sometimes being asked makes it feel forced in the heat of the moment! I think you need to send him a long message telling him you love him and that you are sorry if he felt forced to come out! The message would have to be not pointing the finger at him! You can’t say well you were up all night! Has to be about you validating his feelings and decisions and apologizing! Then leave it alone! You are his mom he is mad he doesn’t hate you he is angry! It won’t last forever although it will feel like it!
Sound like you have some narcissistic behaviors to work on before you could ever have a relationship with your son. Hes 16, not 12 and in the care of adults, not runoff with some man he met on the internet.
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I think you went to far. It’s like you picked at little things. Taking the DS to the police? That’s extreme. And shutting the internet? Idk sounds dramatic to me and yes I have children…. I say leave him alone. Remind him you love him but give him his space.
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You shouldn’t have asked him if he was, you should have let him come out to you on his own terms. Also going to the police? Really… you blew up this relationship, now it’s time to slowly fix it.
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He is in college at 16??
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You want the son back thats ok. You dont want his disrespect of you and your household. He is being rebellous, disrespectful and Im glad you gave the police his DS because I seriously doubt he was doing this before the guy came into the picture. Also, the guy is more than likely an older than 18 yr old. His grandmother needs to not side with your son because all she is doing is allowing him to be disrespectful. Let both of them alone. When he shows her disrespect sh will kick him out.
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Boundaries are fine and necessary. You sound controlling, though, super. Controlling.
You need counseling to help you with your issues and then y’all will need group counseling to fix yalls relationship.
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It’s just so hard I have a 16-year-old as well and you want to keep them safe I mean it’s a different world now from when I grew up 20 years ago now there’s so much people luring in young people and what if he would have gotten to a bad situation ended up getting sex trafficked out and hurt and I understand the mom wanting to protect and keep him safe I’m invading the privacy yes it was but what if it saved is life at the same factor I hope everything works out in time he will get over this my heart goes out to you
I would make contact with a support group for parents of gay children and seek some guidance on how kids feel when they come out. You and I as parents of a gay kid still love our child but there is so much going on in their heads. I don’t understand if your son as taken picture of his own pnis or the 16yr old took a picture of the 13yr old’s pnis. If he has taken a picture of his younger brother then you need to define the lines of what is and isn’t appropriate. It will take time for your son to work through all that is happening in his life. Be thankful he has a Nan who is putting a roof over his head and a safe space. It may not be what you want but it is better than him being out in the streets or somewhere you don’t know. My youngest is gay and and I am single mum and we lived in a very closed minded small town. He really needed to find “his people” and this was a scary time for him and me and I loosened the “rules” but focused on Safe choices, open communication etc". Now at 21 he has finished his apprenticeship, built a home with his partner of 5yrs and opening up more about being gay as a young person etc. We can often loose our kids for periods of time in their lives. Girlfriends come in and take our sons away etc. I hope it works out.
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Modern ways astound me
Who pays college fees etc
It’s almost like the parent child thing has reversed
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Wow some of these comments man she’s only a worried momma and now a younger sibling is traumatized because he saw pictures of his brothers private parts because the said brother just carelessly left them laying around so y’all just give this momma a break geez y’all lighten up will you
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I think your messed up to go to police forget u lady I hope he don’t forgive u
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I’d say both of you should go to therapy… there’s a lot to unpack here. About the only thing you didn’t do wrong was turn off the internet. I have a feeling this “talk” you two had, wasn’t as innocent as you make it seem.
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I would’ve ran away from you too .Instead of building a healthy relationship with him ,you showing him y he shouldn’t trust you .You’re overreacting and doing too much .Taking his personals to the police station? Wow
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Oh my God my 16 year old took a penis picture let me call the police wtf lady
Start supporting him whole-heartedly. And respecting him. You can’t erase what’s done, but it’s never too late to do better
Ugh, I feel so sorry for him. Why would you break his trust and publicly humiliate your child? You got what you deserve, and if he gets in trouble for the ds I’d never talk to you again if I were him.
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Oohh you sound fun! You’re being more than a little dramatic! At 16 I would have left too if I had somewhere else to go! This is insane.
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I think you mainly lost him with the police. As your reasonings are correct and fair, I can also understand why that was a lot on him too - idk it’s hard. Sadly, most teens will be sexting regardless, I’d HOPE it’d at least be with someone his own age rather than like a 40y/o but who knows. You may have lost him or he may just need that time. It’s hard to say cause this is just YOUR side you know? He may perceive it somewhat differently. It’s really hard too cause he’s not going to understand your concerns because he hasn’t needed to be in those shoes as a parent. But I think he may feel like he can be himself more at his grandparents, actually relaxed and happy and not being questioned all the time is nice too. Just weird they’d keep you from coming in THEIR home (not his house so can’t say who can and can’t come in) if they didn’t think he was in the right either - which is where it’s hard, again, since we don’t know his side and they do etc.
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Kids who are predators usually have been abused or are still actively being abused.
You whole family needs help and immediately legal and mental counseling. I’m so sorry, that is horrible 
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When will you realize that YOU are the parent not him? You can go to the court and file and the police will be able to enforce the order & bring him home. Is he in college? What grade is he in?
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Also, it was completely wrong for you to take the DS to the police station if you didn’t find evidence of sexting on there. You’re paranoid and it’s because he told you he was gay and he was up all night talking. Doesn’t mean you’re not ok with him being gay, but I’m 100% positive the events that transpired are why you’re in this position.
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The problem is the grandparents. All teens hate and fight their parents at times. The thing is they aren’t supposed to be Able to escape their parents or their rules. He shouldn’t have any where else to go. He should have to stay and deal with his mom. The grandparents need to send him home.
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And the police aren’t going to take his computer. If there’s no evidence of a possible crime, they’re not going to waste their time and resources. You knew that, you just wanted to intimidate him.
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Therapy. All of you need therapy. I’m having a hard time thinking a younger brother is all that traumatized from a picture of his brothers willy though. Best thing for all is even you need to get into some therapy to try and relate to where your son is coming from. Can you not imagine how hard it is for a teen and one that is gay at that? I think you went to far taking the DS to the police though when it comes to terms with your son. He ran away from you to get away from this kind of behavior. This is going to take years and years of therapy but legally I believe you are still responsible for him. I think you need to talk to a lawyer about your rights when it comes to him being in someone else’s household and they legally aren’t allowed to hold insurance and what not for him. I think he shouldn’t be online that late though. As a parent those boundaries should he set and let him know that being gay doesn’t inconvenience any of you and he can do that in your house in the day time. He thought he had to hide it and keep it for night time for some reason. Family therapy and individual therapy. And remind him the dangers of predators are real but can’t be your only concern here. He obviously didn’t run to a predator so you have to give him credit for that. Good luck.
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I think respect goes two ways. And neither of you are giving it to eachother, except hes 16… so he doesnt fully know respect yet. You should. I wouldnt have asked him if he was gay, if you found out he was, you should have kept it inside you and let him come to you and tell you when he was ready on his own time rather then you outright asking. (Even though you support it). A boundary was crossed there and everyone heals at their own pace. It could take alot longer then 8 months for him to get over it, hes a teenager, their notorious for holding grudges. It can be an uncomfortable question to, so i understand why he felt forced to ‘come out’. If hes safe and loved at his grandparents, let him be there. Communicate more with the grandparents to arrange more time to see/call/facetime your son. Until hes ready for face to face again. I understand your mom instincts kicked in with handing that stuff to the police, but unless you find proof the one he sent it to is in fact over age, i wouldnt have gone to the police. If they weren’t over-age all you essentially did was completely mortify and embarrass him. Teens are curious, especially at that age.
Id just let time run its course for a bit even though momma misses him, trust me, he misses you to. 
Keep in touch but not overbearing.
Im sure you probably did what you felt was right in the moment, and we all make those choices, and mistakes. Have apologizes happened yet? Sometimes sorry can go a long way!
Just my two cents!
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All of you saying she’s in the wrong, you do know your children are not your friends right? That you will need to actually parent them and not worry about if they like you. I am beyond disgusted with so many of these responses. Sounds like her son is bein groomed and a bunch of you think that’s just fine and dandy cause she wanted to know who he was talking to all night. I fear for y’all’s children
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You are the parent. If they refuse to let you see your child they are breaking the law. Somewhere along the way he lost respect for you as an authority figure.
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Go over to grandparents grab your son . He’s 16 !! If he committed any crime your liable period till he’s 18 . Gp don’t let you call the cops period not their son he is yours !!
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Be strong and it’s time to also talk to a lawyer about his grandparents keeping him and not letting you in their home. What are your rights because you are trying to protect your son.
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Also your job is to be his parent not his friend. So good for you.
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Let him go don’t try to force him and maybe one day he will forgive you you will have a relationship with him again he will have to learn from his own mistakes
Should have supported him instead of publicly humiliating him.
You are a 
parent and you got what you deserved.
His grandparents are protecting him.
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Oh some of the comments here are nasty!!!
I totally would taken the ds to police too if I had been in your shoes.
The pressure these teens have today on them is certainly something!
On line safety is also a huge issue, and he feels so trapped by all.
Yes he had okay the rules. Grandparents need be on same page. And have rules.
However, also give him some slack too. As he feels so trapped. And so hard done by. He’s a teen, that’s how many are, hormones and feel he’s old enough take on world.
Being gay shouldn’t be excuse either for him to use and play that card, especially when it comes down to the household rules. W
Maybe see if he can try being at home for one night a fortnight. Just to hang out spend time as family.
Sending hugs mumma sounds like you need them.
And yes a parent first. You’re doing your best. Xx
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Your 13 year old son was TRAUMATIZED by seeing his brother’s willy?? What? 
Good lord that is dramatic.
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How is a 16 year old going to college? None of this makes sense to me lol.
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Hold on I think you forgot who the parent is and they can’t keep u away from your son you went to the police over a picture of his …. But won’t to get your child back
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I wouldn’t come home either. Sounds like a nightmare I would not flat out ever ask my kids if they are part of the lgbtqia I would let them come to me. Two what person don’t take photos of thier boobs vagina or penis alot of adults do it yeah he’s 16 hormones are through the roof. 3 don’t see how him seeing a photo of his brothers penis is traumatizing I guess he shouldn’t have been looking through his ds. If he don’t want to see you then he shouldn’t be forced to. He can go and petition for an Emancipation.
Too controlling…borderline abusive. And humiliating him by taking those pics to the police. …Teens sext. It is just a normal thing. This is why raise them to know about not meeting anyone off internet in private. Only public places for dates and never go back to homes after. Police can’t control your kid so taking those photos to the police was you just wanting to embarrass him.
My parents were abusive and spread lies about me being a thief and everything else so family wouldnt get involved. I ran off too to live with my brothet at 17,but they broke into the house one day while my brother was at work and dragged me back home. Hated them forever for that. Was in hell for 2 years until could run off with a guy met off internet…bada bing…and lived with him for 4 years until we married. Luckily met the right guy off the internet. Drag him back and you will just run him off into the scenario you claim you are trying to protect him from. Leave him alone!
Maybe,in time,he will talk to you again, but he will hate you forever if you force him to contact you. I can’t stand the sound of my mom’s voice or even seeing her face to this day. Still hold resentment for my dad for just sitting back and ignoring her beating the hell out of me daily when she was drugged out on her pain meds she got after cancer surgery. She got hooked and is still hooked on them with horrible temper to this day and she acts proud that can’t live with anyone bc no one can stand to be around her. My parents got divorced shortly after i left,bc i bet she turned her abuse to my dad after. Karma.
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Your son sounds very entitled. His grandparents are enabling it & by the sounds of it, likely alienating him against you.
He is YOUR child, If YOU have legal custody, as in, theres no court order saying you do NOT have legal custody, then you need to call the police for a civil standby, show up over there & TAKE your son home! If a judge has not granted the grandparents legal custody, then they have ZERO rights & are actually committing a crime. They can be charged with kidnapping for refusing you, your son!
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All these fake scenarios people just love to fall for, opiniate and pontificate over.
Reading the comments here are a great example of how this world has gotten where it is. What a sad group of woman tearing each-other down. Pathetic…
I’m the parent-I have shut the internet off at my house for far less… We have to protect our children, no one else will. We are their advocates, no one else is…
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I would want to know if one of my children were being groomed, so I completely understand that aspect of the story. You mentioned he is in collage.? First off, that’s amazing, at 16 years old, most are still struggling with high school. So, here’s my opinion, not that it matters, but since you asked if I were in your shoes, I would continue to reach out to him as much as possible, however I would do it from a distance. If he is safe and happy where he is, why force him to move back home where he will be miserable for what? 15 months? 24 at the most. Then when he turns 18 (if he doesn’t run away before then) he will leave for good and never return.
It would cause so much unnecessary tension in the house, I don’t think it would be good for anyone there.
He’s a teen, they have so many emotions, and more hormones then his body knows how to deal with. So, he’s probably embarrassed that you confronted him about being gay, that’s a hard thing to come forward with, even to your closest people. Do you know for certain little brother didn’t give him a hard time about this? There seems to be some obvious tension between the 2 of them. Going through his DS is like going through his phone. I can imagine any teenager would be upset with that. Even more embarrassing was the photos.
I talk to my kids all the time about the dangers of sharing that kind of stuff with Anyone. Even if they know the person, at any time, the photos could end up in the wrong hands. That being said, teenagers don’t have the ability to think things through like adults do. The reasoning part of their brain isn’t completely developed until they’re 25 years old. But if I ever found inappropriate pictures , I would most certainly talk to them , face to face and find out exactly why they were taken and who they were taken for. THEN if I wasn’t satisfied with the answer or thought for a second they were lying , I would threaten to take it to the law so I could get to the bottom of it.
Do you know the boyfriend? Let’s assume he met him in college, and he’s 18 19 years old, and the picture was sent to him. By you taking the DS to the police, you not only shared the most intimate secret of your son being gay, you may have also just got him and his boyfriend into some serious problems. 2 years isn’t a big age difference, but if he’s in possession of child p*r^ you could have opened the biggest can of worms. I 100% understand why your son is so upset. If you want a chance to be in his life, you may need to come to the harsh reality that he isn’t a little boy anymore, and some serious pain was caused to him because of this.
I truly feel for you from one mom to another, and I wish I could tell what you want to hear, but I do hope someday you will get a relationship back with him. Please consider how he feels, how traumatized he is from all that has happened. If his grandpa doesn’t know he’s gay, there is a reason for that. HE obviously wasn’t ready for everyone to know.
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Your son is angry for going to the police,
Maybe you should of thought about his feelings.
There is just a lot that doesn’t make sense.
Try and see if you can do therapy because he is dealing with a lot and hopefully the grandma will support this
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Your family needs professional counseling!!!
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You really keep burning bridges with him. You’ve made it clear you have no respect for his privacy and will continue to do what you can to “get him in trouble” if he doesn’t do what you want. You’re the jerk.
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Just reading these comments on how 16 year olds should be free to do as they please because it’s their right 
I can now see how millions of children every year are able to be sex trafficked.
You have crossed so many lines that I highly doubt there is any hope to fix the relationship with your son. Not only did you completely shatter any trust he would have ever had in you but you lit that shattered mess on fire. You need to get yourself in counseling because there is something seriously wrong with the way your mind works if you think what you’ve done to your son is ok.
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Honestly, if I were him I wouldn’t want to talk to you either. You have went way beyond what you should have in his eye’s. Some people might agree with you and if he was younger than that I might possibly understand but at 16 you have taken it too far.
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This entire post is about you. Your thoughts. Your feelings. What about your sons thoughts and feelings? Have you ever once stopped and considered what your choices as a mother have done to him mentally and emotionally?
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Sounds like he has issues and is trying to blame it on being gay. His grandparents might be brainwashing too
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He made his choice. The more you go chasing him, the more he will run away. But when you let the string go, when he has nothing left, no one left, he will finally know that your the only one who loves him. Being gay is a difficult struggle for teens bc they are still trying new things, still curious. He’ll come back girl, give it a little more time. In the dark, you will be his only light. He’ll see it someday
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You should have trusted your son and not gone to the police. Wtf
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I personally think you took it too far by taking his ds to police. I think he feels his privacy was violated and he may think he’s being punished for how he feels.
You’ve overstepped your boundaries with your child and he now wants nothing to do with you. I think it’s best right now to just leave him alone and stop being like this towards him because it’s pushing him away.
He won’t want to to come back to place where his privacy is constantly violated and may end up with police on his back for something.
He’s at that age now where his hormones are all over the place. Hell get angry easily, despise you and everything else that comes with being a teenager.
His brother had no right to even look through his DS anyway. Another violation of his privacy. You’ve been harassing him to give you answers and forced him to say something he wasn’t ready to say. You need to take a step back from this situation and see what YOUR actions are also doing. Maybe it’s best to see a professional about how to deal with it or something. Because what you’re doing now is only making it worse and will end up completely ruining whatever relationship you guys may have in the future.
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I’m sorry you’re going through this hun but I’m glad in these times I don’t have freaking internet in my household for this shit to happen right here dsi’s game boys and these Nintendo switches that have access to the internet for kids that are underneath the age of 10 sometimes you don’t know what kind of creep pedophile is out there trying to groom your child into running away or any kind of sex trafficking that could be out there the internet is never a safe place. Oh and before all you Karen’s jump down my throat about this comment my ex-boyfriend’s daughter who was only 9 years old at the time had a DSi connected to the internet and talking to people halfway around the damn world don’t tell me I don’t know what the hell I’m talking about it’s creeps like that that take off with our kids
As a mother and a parent you did the right thing…I still find it so hard to digest the fact that giving birth to a child as a boy only to wake up after 16yrs saying he’s a gay I mean c’mon…This gender of a thing as brought a lot of down fall to the society at large….The question is “why would a man or boy be interested in having an intimate relationship with a man ? Or why would a woman be interested in a woman “? This isn’t discrimination but it’s totally ungodly…Look at what the society as turn to because of this….God is watching and he sees all.
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Sorry you should of never took his DS to the police station you showed him there you didn’t believe or trust him I have 3 sons grown and I would never done that good luck
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Coming from someone who is bisexual, in a very religious family, I understand your concerns for possible grooming etc, however this is not how to do it. Your son is a teenager, most teenagers won’t divulge everything about their lives to their parents. Especially if you continued to say you didn’t care whether or not he was gay, you should’ve waited until he was ready. Whether it was just bringing his boyfriend around, you should treat it like a norm. I remember how awful it felt when I wrote in a journal about me liking girls, someone found it and gave it to my grandma, we had a big meeting on why gay is wrong and I had to lie to myself and everyone. I had to go to church extra, and it was humiliating. I never trusted them again, and there’s still resent in my heart in some ways, because I knew who I was, but I had to lie. Coming out is a very big step for LGBTQ+ teenagers, there’s a lot of pressure, and you should have let your son come out on his own terms. Not yours because of your fears. It’s okay to have fears and what you’re children are exposed to, however you cannot treat/parent them differently because of said fears. I wouldn’t want to talk to you, especially after showing his genitalia to cops, I understand the law, but you should have really sat him down, explained your concerns, do not push nor break any of his boundaries. Let HIM be ready to talk, that’s the only way you won’t push your child away further, let him know you’re a safe space, and despite whatever he’s doing, he can always be honest with you. Trust and respect goes both ways in a parent/ child relationship. Whether or not you believe that people should respect their elders or not, you did not respect him and his privacy. I have cut off the majority of my family because they could not respect my boundaries.
If he lives wth his grandparents and he has expressed he dont want to see u I say 
there respecting that 4 wat ever reason rite now he doesn’t want to see u and if the DS is ur 16yr olds then u are in the rong invading privacy nd goin thru it also ur half rite about sending nd receiving pictures of that sort I no coz I no someone who works in law enforcement if the 2 ppl are in a concentual relationship if there both In a age gap of a yr 2 Max it actually is NOT ILLIGAL if both parties want to receive and want to send pictures
This… has some holes in it. I feel like there’s a lot more going on than what’s being said, on both ends.
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In some places he could be charged with child pornography for sending photos to another minor…
I sure hope that that doesn’t happen and it end up following him for the rest of his life.
Better to be safe than sorry.
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You are in the wrong here. Sorry not sorry. You never should have forced him to tell you he was gay or take his DS to the police.
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You need to earn his trust now…you’ve betrayed him, no matter how loving you thought you were being you needed to wear his shoes and definitelydidn’t. He will be fine, let him breathe, drop the investigation and earn him back. Good luck you’ve got a lot of work to do!!!
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Wow. Those actions have cost you having a relationship with your son.
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You shouldn’t have took his DS to the police. Why would you do that? Now all of that’s going to be documented at the police station…possibly giving him a record. He was probably just flirting with his boyfriend. Something he’s going to do anyway. That doesn’t earn back trust.
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The main thing that I’m confused about is why did you force your son to come out to you? Why did it matter if he was gay? From the way you wrote this post, it seems like you were likely being hostile more than you were being a firm parent. Reporting pictures he took of his penis to the police before speaking to him and finding out what happened first was not right because now he could get charged with a crime… your literally pushing him away. Give him space, he’s a teen and will come to you when he needs you. You need to rebuild trust with him but you could start by apologizing for not respecting his feelings and boundaries. You are the parent but kids deserve respect and privacy too.
Coming out is a very significant moment and you literally pried it out of him. I get as a mom you were concerned, but even after coming out you took his DS to the police with a picture of his private parts. You violated his privacy, and forced him to come out.
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Should’ve stated from the beginning that the reason he doesn’t want anything to do with you is bc you invaded his privacy multiple times. Would’ve saved a lot of time. Also, it’s just weird to me that his privacy was violated but you’re more worried about how “traumatized the younger son was after seeing the photo.
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Ur in the wrong, I would’ve ran away from home too if I was ur son, being this strict is gonna cost u a relationship with ur son, teenagers ur supposed to be more like their friend as well as their safe space, being controlling and strict no good will come of it, if u wanna mend ur relationship ur gonna have to give him room to make his own choices
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My son is about to be 18 and a few months ago got upset with me cause I was treating him.as a adult telling him to get ready to work hour before so I wouldnt b speeding to get him to work on time and he told me off and got mad at me wtf wouldn’t talk to me for 3 months I hated it like wtf I’m your mother 
sometimes kids r butts
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As a mother I will do exactly the same to be sure that my kid is safe and not in a danger situation, the internet is a very dangerous place for our kids.
I will have a conversation with his grandparents as well, you all should be working and dealing with the situation together.
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God youre one of those parents who thinks they need to know EVERYTHING about their 16 year old child. Nosy is what it is. In the UK 16 is legal age for sending receiving sexual content
Leave him alone. You badgered him into revealing his sexuality when he wasn’t ready. You’ve broke his trust. And as for taking the DS to the police station, thats dead wrong. They’re not gonna do anything because your son of legal age took pics of his willy, even if he sent them to a 100 year old man. He’s legal Apologise
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It sounds like he’s probably extremely embarrassed and humiliated and is having a very hard time facing you. I’m sure that coming out is not easy, even in the best circumstances. But now the whole police department has pictures of his privates to top it off. He feels like you sold him out and now you’re going to have to wait it out and hope to God that one day, he will find some way to understand that, even though you didn’t handle any of that in the best way, you did what you thought was best to protect him. Being a parent is hard and we don’t always make the best decisions but humiliating them publicly and invading their very personal business is absolutely never the answer.
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Why would you involve the police? Why would you betray your own kid like that? Girl you have no right to ask him to come back. I wouldn’t wanna come back to you either. You owe him an apology.
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Kinda sounds like grooming tbh… he’s 16… he’s YOUR KID. He’s not allowed to move out and if GP’s won’t let you see him call in a welfare check if you are concerned. Being gay is fine… being 16 and gas with a grown man is not… he needs to tell you who his bf is or you need to continue to investigate…your his mom he doesn’t need to like you…and you don’t need to stop prying just cause he gets mad. If something feels off it usually is
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If something happened to him and you posted this afterward all these comments would be filled with OMG why did you not follow your gut! So ignore those making comments about his privacy…he’s 16 he gets LIMITED privacy
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Wrong for going to the police, you betrayed your own son. Now I’m sure he’s humiliated cause the PD has pictures of his private.
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Yeah you’re being way too harsh on him, my mom did something like that was I was 16 to me because the boy was 18, I tried to “unalive” myself. Not every parent wants to hear this but STOP SCARING YOUR KIDS!. Take their word on certain situations, 16 yr old (believe it or not) have sexual urges too, if you’re a good parent who actually open to talking to their kids they’ll tell you about things they aren’t sure of. Hopefully, you can get those charges dropped, your son will probably be the one to be in trouble since he took them and sent them. Let him talk to you or he’s never going to trust you again.
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Poor kid. Sounds like you did so much to push him away. At least he has the grands.
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You realize, now he can be charged with possession of child porn. And you did that. He can be tried as an adult and have to register as a sex offender for the rest of his life. It is illegal as you said because he is a minor. It really makes no difference that it was his own penis. You unfortunately can’t force him back home. Most places won’t deal with it if they’re over 16 because by the time it goes to court they’ll be 18. That’s what they told us with my niece.
He is very conflicted… he may or may not actually be gay. Another reason for his drama. He may not know. He just knows that his drama is important. Let him go… it won’t last forever. Reassure him of your love and support.
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