His girlfriend has no say so in how your child is laid to rest 
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I think it means the 18 year old son passed away and her soon-to-be-ex husband has a gf with younger children. The almost ex husbands gf wanted the sonâs body to be split up 6 ways. She wasnât his mom and shouldnât have a say. End of story.
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Girlfriend has 0 say
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Wonât never be cremated I want to be buried and if thatâs what you think is right then do whatever you want to
I wouldnât split his ashes up, he deserves to stay in one place. Lay him to rest where you think is best
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His girlfriend should have no say so, itâs not like she was his wife.
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What was your sons wish? Did he ever talk about it? Maybe to friends? What was his opinion of his father? I will take all these questions under consideration first
Doesnât anyone know what the son would have wanted?
Iâ m truly sorry for your loss, may your son Rest in Peace as he should. If the father of your son was not so involved in your sons life up until his passing then thereâs no debate you should do whatâs in your desire. Ultimately he is only doing it for his own benefit only.
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Please bury him
Sorry for your lossâ:pray:
Lay your son to rest how you want they shouldnât have a say.
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Follow your heart. Iâm so sorry for your loss. As his mother, if you want him buried, then he should be buried.
Iâm so sorry for your loss. It doesnât matter what your husbandâs girlfriend wants, if she wasnât a part of his life. It also doesnât matter what he wants, if he willingly chose not to be in your sonâs life. If you solely raised your son then it should solely be your decision.
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So the father was not in his sonâs life?? Why would he have any say??
Donât split anything. Do what YOU want to do.
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She was a girlfriend. They were not married. She has no say.
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Iâm so sorry for your loss. My son passed away almost 3 years ago and I laid him to rest how I believe he would have wanted to. It was against how his father wanted it but I didnât care. I had him cremated and I wear a chain around my neck with a few of his ashes in there. He had a baby and we got a chain for him also. You know, as his mom, what he would want. Remember him, and remember what he would want. In the end, it doesnât really matter if he is âsplitâ in 6 once cremated or not. He will always be with you in your heart and in your memories. From one momma to another who has lost their babies, please remember that. 
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I think it is already so painful to lose a child as to be thinking of split his ashes to be honest. Men are very careless that in a move out of house it is possible to lose the ashes I think you should keep them yourself and have a good memory of your son and know that the best place to rest forever is next to mom
Iâm sorry this is a tough one when you donât have an answer. Does anyone know what your son would have wanted? If you truly feel itâs best he be laid to rest then follow through with it. His father probably wants his ashes because itâs out of state and wonât be able to visit his place of resting?
What would your son want⌠thats what you should doâŚ
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It your son you decide kick his girlfriend to the curb
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Your legally his wife. She will have no leg to stand on.
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Girlfriends donât get wife/mom level accomodations
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My sons father just died a month ago. Having him cremated was the cheapest way to go for us and even though he was absent from our sons life these last two years, I felt that we should put some of his ashes in necklaces I bought, some will be spread in two areas of the lake we lived on and the rest will be in an urn next to his grandparents here at his moms. Sometimes having a piece of them with us is the only way we make it through it. Take a general consensus and see what the family as a whole wants. I can only imagine how hard this is for you, but try to keep everyone else in mind too. Iâm sure your ex thought heâd have more time with your son and Iâm sure heâs regretting not spending what time he could with him.
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Lay him to rest.They can always visit him.She has nothing to do with your son, she has no way, and he wasnât involved
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If he wasnât in your kids life he should have no say in it. You are the mom and you should do as you feel is best for your son.
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Are you his next of kin? If so then bury him. I know he was young but did your boy ever say what he wanted (in conversation)? X
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Sounds like his dad wasnt in his life he chose the girlfriend over his kids I think you need to lay your son to rest as u feel is right.Too bad if dad doesnât agree he wasnât there anyway
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My Motherâs ashes were split. It didnât bother me. Really sheâs a part of all of us anyway. I donât see a problem
You have older children as well that I assume were with you and the youngest child? What do they want? He you had him and he was with you then Iâd say bury him if thatâs what you like unless he had voiced his wishes before passing.
Itâs ur decision⌠if no one knows for definite what ur son would have wanted⌠then u decide⌠bury him⌠u gave birth to him⌠if u bury him everyone will have a place to go to visit⌠so its not like they wonât have anywhere to go⌠she has no control⌠sounds like she had enough control of him when he was alive⌠dont let her Control this.
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Im so sry for ur loss
You raised him, you decide
I am so sorry for your loss. But what would you son of wanted. You do what you feel he would of wanted and what you feel is right. Your the mother
Iâm so sorry for your loss. Do what you think is best you are his momma! Lay his body to rest and his siblings can come visit him.
Idk. It just makes my skin crawl to think about my body decaying in the ground. But if thatâs whatâs going to help you cope then thatâs what you should do.
I couldnât handle the thought of cremating our daughter. I read about the cremation process and it was upsetting to me. Do what you feel is right.
You are his mother you make the decisions. No one else.
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Youâre his momma. Unless he had other papers, you get the final say
Have his finger print taken so they can get keepsakes with his finger print and lay that baby to rest the way you see fit
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Iâm so sorry for your loss⌠But if your sons father was not in his life for whatever reason, you mama have all rights as to where you lay your son to rest. Your exâs girlfriend has ZERO say!
I honestly would plan it all without their knowledge, and once your son is laid to rest âif YOU wantâ you can then inform his father of the location he is buried, if he would like to start visiting his son now.
Itâs always the toughest situations that people make the hardest⌠I am truly sorry.
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Your still his wife so you make the decission bury him
Screw what your ex wants. Do it the way you want
If uâve had any conversation with him about what he wanted, do that. Give him that wish. Iâve had that convo with my bf and mom. Theres companies that take ashes and make pendants. Thatâs what we want. Make pendants for each other and our 3 kids and if theres enough closest family.
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YOU ARE THE MOTHER. âGirlfriendâ of the Father should have absolutely NO SAY in where and how YOUR son rests!
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You are mom. She is just a girl friend
Iâm so very sorry for your loss
When my daughter passed away her husband (not the father of any of the kids) had her cremated. He finally gave the ashes to my granddaughter. She had the ashes divided into little urns. One for me and one for each of her 4 brothers. My granddaughter felt that she shouldnât be the only one with the ashes.
U donât have to give him anything if you donât want to. However I had final disposition for my uncle he had no kids and wife passed before him. He said whatever I choose. I want him home where he belongs but I did allow one of his sister to have a small vial of ashes for jewelry. So that maybe could be a option? The jewelry doesnât use a lot of ashes so that way your not really splitting him in different ways. Most of him would be buried like you want. Maybe give that a thought. Thereâs so much u can do for memorial stuff with ashes. Jewelry. Ash balls. Beads etc
So sorry for your loss. If you want him buried, then that is what you need to do. Exâs girlfriend has no say. If the dad was not a part of his life, then he should not have a say either.
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Do you know what your sonâs wishes were?
Not her kid NOT her say.
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His YOUR child you brought him up not some ring in girlfriend who thinks she can just take over your decision
Do what you think is best to do with your son and his father lost his rights when he left with the new girlfriend n forgot about his son
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Perhaps you can cremate him and spread his ashes somewhere that has meaning to him. I agree not to split him up. That is weird.
I guess the biggest question is, what would son want?
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If he was under your custody and dad was choosing not to see his own flesh and blood you do what you think is best for your baby. Im so so sorry for your loss i cannot imagine the broken heart prayers to you THE GIRLFRIEND GETS NO AUTHORITY you dont listen to her wishes for your child
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Your exâs girlfriend doesnât get a say in what you do with YOUR child. You lay him to rest as you see fit, you are his mother. As for splitting, if you felt it was okay, maybe make a small keepsake with a tiny bit of ashes. Either way, it is your decision and nobody else gets that say. I am sorry for your loss and even more sorry that you have assholes to deal with.
Iâm sorry everyone is being really nice in their comments but if this were me, Iâd tell the GF to F ALL THE WAY OFF AND DIRECTLY TO HER FACE! THE NERVE of this âwomanâ to even THINK she has any say so whatsoever!!! So, to answer your question, you bury your whole son, do not split him with anyone, and let that precious child rest in peace!
Iâm so very sorry for your loss 
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Your the mother id do it your way. So sorry for your loss
Iâd think long and hard about what heâd want.
No matter how hard, do that.
May I suggest somethingâŚ. There are lockets that will hold a tiny amount of ashes and screw to seal completely shut. Iâm so sorry you are going through this butttttt, before you lay him to rest, truly consider a small SMALL amount going to your husband and consider getting one for yourself.
We can be blunt and a bit crude but that small amount of Ash isnât going to bother your son one bit, I promise. He isnât going to be bothered that his parents want a small bit of him with them at all times.
And in my area I havenât heard of burying the ashes. I thought the purpose to cremation was to avoid a burial.
The other option is to just divide the ashes in half⌠he can do with it what he wishes. It took took to make him and two to handle his death. Just because your soon to be ex chased some fast tail and ignored his kid for a while doesnât mean he doesnât love him and will be grieving him as well and we all grieve differently.
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Oh goodness I agree with you bury him that way everyone can go to his place of rest and visit him and he wonât be âsplitâ thatâs a lot for anyone to expect
Why are you even listening to her requests? Tell her to fuck off! This is your son, you are his mother you raise your boy and have never left his side unlike your ex and his mrs!
They have no right or say in the matter, do what puts your mind and heart at ease
May he Rest In Peace
First, I am so incredibly sorry for your loss 
Second, I cannot get over the audacity in which the girlfriend thinks she has a say in any of this⌠like seriously. Unless Iâm missing something I canât wrap my brain around why she thinks she has a thread of a right to speak on this!
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What do you think HE would want? Sorry for your loss I know how hard it is.
If your the mother and you raised him, no one should have a say but you. There is no right or wrong answer.
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Bury him. Thatâs your baby. His gf has no say in it.
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Firstly, Iâm sorry to hear of the passing of your son. Secondly, your character shines through the fact you are considering your exâs input even when he wasnât involved.
The only thing I can say is thatâs your baby and you need to do what you feel is right in your heart. Itâs a big decision, but 6 ways sounds a bit much in my personal opinion. If anything it should be the two parents. Maybe thatâs a step you guys can settle on or at least discuss and consider. Wishing you all the best in this difficult time 
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Iâm sorry, but WHAT??? This is NOT a girlfriends decision in any way, shape or form. It is not her child!!! End of story!!! This is your decision and yes bury him.
I am so terribly sorry for your loss!
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My Mum died 2 years ago and my dad got 99% of her ashes, I asked for some so she is always with me. The funeral home did this for us.
You could always split his ashes in half, half with you and half his dad.
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Girl byeâŚyour child period
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Iâm very sorry for your loss⌠I think deciding to cremate or bury is a personal choice. I have told my husband that I would like to be cremated. I want him to send (or take a trip) to Artful Ashes to have a unique memorial made for each of our kids. I like what they do. Their pieces are beautiful ad creative. I want my kids to feel like I am always with them. Not obligated to visit my grave. Thatâs my choice though. I hope you both can find peace in this difficult time.
This is confusing. Is the girlfriend you mentioned your sonâs girlfriend and those his kids or is she âstep momâ so to speak of your son? Why split ashes 6 ways? If he itâs cremated it sounds like there will be a fight over ashes if he is buried no one can fight over the ashes. I am sorry for your loss.
We lost our young son as well, sincere thoughts and prayers for you and the father. The current girlfriend has no rights or say period. Please do what ultimately brings you the most comfort- the pain and grief will be with you for life donât let anyone influence your personal decision. God bless
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It doesnât matter âŚto dust we will return either way.
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I personally feel like ashes being split is like body parts being split. Not everyone agrees & I totally get that but if someone does that to me, I sure home the ashes of my middle finger goes to the person I like the least. You should bury him.
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First and foremost I am truly sorry for your loss and there is no words of comfort that will work at the moment. This is ultimately your choice and what you feel or know your son would want - if I were in your shoes my son would be buried amongst the family that raised and shared in his upbringing and love and care and I dang sure would not oblige someone who tried to step into your shoes before a divorce even occurred and truly has NO right of action or opinion in the matter. As another person posted block out the noise and ask your own heart what your son would want and you will get your answer and you will be content with your decision - let no one make you do what you donât want to sweetie. You are in my prayers in this time of grief and God has you covered to make the decision listen to your own heart.
When my husband passed away at 25, his mom really wanted to bury him in Michigan (their home state) but we lived in MD. I knew he wouldnât have cared what we did if it brought us all a little piece so I proposed we have him cremated and split the ashes. I got half in a urn, she got a small keepsake urn, and we buried the rest in an urn made for burials (they have to be air tight to bury) in Michigan. They also had jewelry you could have with ashes in the pendent. Maybe you could do one of the smaller options for the 6 people and bury the rest. Im terribly sorry for your loss and I know that for some, âsplittingâ ashes can be a difficult concept. I just wanted to share some of the options I know about.
His girlfriend has no say on it. Itâs a matter between YOU and HIS FATHER. No one else.
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This is a choice only you and his father can make. In saying that if I was with someone and treated their kids as my own I can understand she too must be grieving but she needs to step back and respect what you and dad want.
If your husbands current gf wants to have your son cremated that is not her decision at all! It is your decision if your son was with you. Your husband technically abandoned your family if before being divorced he moved with his new gf to a new state. You are the mother fight for what you think is best
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Thatâs not her decision to make. Youâre his mom.
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Why is this a question? Youâre the mother- itâs your son so you have the rights to the ashes.
If the chick was his wife (which she wasnât), then she would have the rights.
She shouldnât even get anything from him since- it sounds like- she made him move out of state and him cut all ties with his family? If so, what a bitch.
Are those three underaged kids his?? If not, then she shouldnât get anything. Not even the kids bc theyâre not his kids.
If they are, then you can get one of those tiny urns and give it to them.
If you want to just bury him and not cremate him, then do just that.
If heâs buried, the gf canât do anything about it once the casket is closed.
what did he want? If youâre unsure Iâd leave the decision to his parents if that an option. And if not leave the decision to his children. Now is not the time for you to force what you want on anyone.
Did he ever discuss what he wanted? In my family itâs a common topic. If he did is go with that. If not, youâre momma. You were there for him when your ex started a new life. So, my vote is that you get to honor him in the way you choose.
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Iâm so very sorry about your son
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Bury him properly and not worry about your soon to be ex-husbandâs gf needs. This is a time for you & family to grieve. Sorry for you & your familyâs loss, sending prayers so young you have more important things to worry about than your future ex wants and needs.
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Your his moma bury him if that is what you want Iâd never split him up , only my opinion NO one is going to do that too my child
Bury him you are his mum , fuck wat the new gf and the dad wants coz nah thats not kewl splitting him up like that
Iâm sorry for your loss. I donât think thereâs a right away of handling this. You need to do what you feel is right. If youre the 1 caring for him while his father did nothing he doesnât get to step in & dictate your decisions now. I donât understand why his gfs children need your sons ashes. Thats just weird.
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Should be up to his family not his gf but the family needs to get to gather n make a plan. My bf father passed and there has been drama in the family since his dads sister did have him cremated n certain people got ashes but if the family decides to bury itâs not her choice. She can always bring the children to the grave site to visit him as well.
Do u know what ur son would want?
You are the mom.
YOU! MAKE THE CHOICE.
everyone gets selfish on weddings and funerals
You will regret it for the rest of your life if you do it their way.
You need closure for you.
My brother died 8 years ago and he wanted to be cremated.
My family also owns a cemetery.
My grandfather picked a beautiful bench for him. And had him sealed into the bench.
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So I think the ex is who passed away⌠I think the page titled it wrong because that is the only thing that makes sense⌠Why would the step mom per se want her kids to have step brothers ashes⌠I think itâs the dad and step mom wants to split between his 6 kids⌠At least thatâs the only way this post makes sense to me
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I think I read this wrong is it your soon to be ex-husband passing not your sonâs?
If its your soon to be ex-husbandâs do what the gf suggests itâs only fair to all children. He must have wanted cremation if she lived with him. He could at least be with all 6 children if he couldnât whole alive. Also suggest her help with the costs since she wants a say in his wake and arrangements.
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His girlfriend shouldnât have a sayâŚthe choice belongs to you and your ex spouse
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Sorry fot your loss itâs not up to her she needs to mind her business it between u & sonâs dad only
Aww Iâm so sorry for your loss. I feel like itâs entirely up to you since you husband left and abandoned you and the kids. Im sorry youâre going through this. I think you should bury him of thatâs what you want to do.
If thatâs his children let that man be split with his kids. Dont be petty that she took him from you. This is why people and inlaws dont get along. If itâs your exes other kids then itâs not her call. This post is confusing tbh.
You donât have to listen to your husbandâs girlfriendâs wishes⌠at all. I think you should do what you think is right and bury him. If it were me, I wouldnât want him to be split up either.
Iâm trying to get over the audacity that she has even suggesting you do that.
I am so very sorry for the loss of your son. 
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It sounds like you know what you want momma, follow your heart. My condolences to you, a mother should never have to bury her child
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