Bury him so that anyone who loved him can go visit.
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I would just leave her out of it and bury him. She can get the location and bring the kids to visit the grave. Thatās it
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When we lost my brother, we cremated him and split him between all the siblings, mom, his daughter, nieces and nephews. We set the rest free with our dad. They passed 3 months apart.
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The husband passed away, not the son
Assuming your son wasnāt married ( making your sons wife the new determiner of this situation) then yes YOU have ever right to lay your son to rest how you please.
Why would it matter to his gf and her underage kids what happens to YOUR son?
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Bury him, they can always visit him
His current girlfriend? Youāre his mother not her. Sheās disgusting and needs to shut her mouth. Ew. Iām soooooo sorry for your loss.
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When my wife passed away 4 years ago she wanted to be cremated. Her mother demanded she have her because that was her daughter. We have a son together (I got pregnant before we were together but she was there from day one). I refused to just hand my wife over as her mother was never in her life until 3 years before her passing. Then all her siblings from her momās side wanted to split her and I told them no that wasnāt what she wanted.
Do what u want they donāt have a say itās ur son
I donāt understand. The plan was to divorce when your youngest turned 18, but he was never in your kids life and was raising a family with another woman?
My dad was split between people he wanted to have a piece of him as a necklace
I have the rest of him as he is my father. He has a wife, she was fine with me having him. We al got a piece. If he cared about them and they want some- why not? Heās resting now and thatās what matters. Think like he would
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Donāt think about what you guys want try to think about what your son would of wanted for his final arrangements
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Girl bury your baby. Do what brings you the most peace. Iām so sorry for your loss 
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I am confused after reading the comments. Who died? Her son or ex?
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This went from her husband to a son. I took that the only reason she mentioned the son is because he turned 18 and that is when she was getting a divorce cause her son was older then.
Bury him correct and no cremated
If youāre still legally his wife then Iād fight to have him buried, she doesnāt really have a say here I donāt think. Let her be mad, this isnāt about her.
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My oldest son passed away last year, you do what you think is best for your son and you. If you donāt feel itās right to split him up then donāt. Bury him at nice resting area, where everybody can go see him whenever they want. Your exās gf has no fuckin say in what you do about how to lay YOUR son to rest. Iām extremely sorry for your loss and that you have to go through any of this.
Bury him. All loved ones can visit and pay their respects that way
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Iām also confused. Did your husband or son pass away? Either way Iām so sorry for your loss.
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Cremation is good for the environment. Did the guy leave a will talking about his final journey on this planet.
You do what you wantā¦His father wasnāt there thru life so shouldnāt be there thru death x
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Bury your son. If his dad didnāt want him when he was alive, he doesnāt get him now that heās at rest.
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Absolutely bury and leave him to rest. Whoever wants to come visit, just like before, still can and always will. 
prayers for your family 
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Iām sorry for your loss
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His dad has no say imo. Bury him. If they want a part of it they can go visit his grave!
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Iām so sorry for your loss.
You do as you wish as he was not in his life.
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Lay your son to rest whole your sonās dad girlfriend doesnāt have a say.
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Who the hell is his girlfriend to have any say. Tell her to shut her mouth and sit down. Do what your heart tells you to do.
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Iām sorry for your loss 
I say do what you think is right, heās your baby and his father wasnāt there in life so he can shove it, the gf can keep her thoughts to herself she doesnāt even get a say imo
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So very sorry for your loss. You do what you need to do for that boy and yourself. Give him a special place you can visit, let him Rest In Peace. No one has a right to disturb him now
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I wouldnāt care what the girlfriend thought. Iād give my son the burial i want.
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I may be wrong but donāt they have to be legally married for her to even have a say in it all?
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I canāt answer what is right for you guys or best in your situation, but Iāve requested to be cremated & NOT split up.
What did your son want? Was it ever talked about, even in passing? If not, do what you feel in your heart he would want you to do.
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Iām sorry for your loss hun. Lay your baby to rest. He didnt want to be around while he was alive he sure doesnt deserve to claim anything now that hes passed.
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Bury him and let him rest please donāt do no split crap you come in this world as one leave it as one.
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If u want him bury then do it the girlfriend has no say so period!!! So sorry for ur loss
Just gonna put this out thereā¦ What about doing what you think your son would have wanted?
And yes, I am talking from experience. My mother, my father, my sister & 1 of my brotherās have all passed away (1 at a time, not all together). At every opportunity Iāve tried to do what I think they would have wantedā¦
Itās the very last thing you can do for them, so do what they would have wanted.
I will stand by this. Iāve even lost my motherās family in a massive rift because they didnāt agree. But, to me, thatās not what is most importantā¦
You raised him! Your choice
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I believe her wording was misinterpreted. Sounds like it was her ex husband who passed. Before they could finally divorce. Not that her son passed away
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You are his legal wife and you should do as you and his family wishes. His girlfriend has no say so.
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Bury him! Do not cremate! God wants him buried!
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My son passed away by suicide in 2008, he was 21. He had 2 biological children with a long time girlfriend. And a father that wasnāt present for years. Since my son and the gf werenāt married, in our state, final decisions fell on me. I laid him to rest the most respected way possible amongst everyoneās input. I made my own decisions and I included his brother and sisters wishes but that was about it. The dads gf in this picture should be irrelevant (at least it would be to me), you carried that baby no matter how oldā¦ he is yours and you are still his momma even in death. Honestly she must think highly of herself to even think she had an opinion in this case at all. If it were me, she would be told to have SEVERAL seats and shut the **** up. I hope your heart leads you to peace with your decision. Itās a super hard place to be to grieve but be responsible as well when your world is crashing. But you will get through it and when that day is over, know you did the right thing and remember your son how you knew him best. Believe me, if you want your baby buried, bury himā¦because I PROMISE you, youāll spend many hours where ever heās laid to rest. I know I still do.
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First of all you and only you carried him for nine months. When the grieving period has passed you as his mom will grieve for the rest of your life. DONāT let anyone tell you what to do with your son especially a father who hasnāt been there for him. Do in your heart what YOU feel is best that way as time passes YOU will be at peace with yourself. Sorry for you loss.
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Iām so sorry for your loss. This is difficult enough without having to have the extra stress. Do what you need to do and let him rest in peace.
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That is YOUR choice. Not the girlfriends. You do what you think is rightā¦
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Have him cremated and kept with you.
Gravesites are such a waste of space. What if you move? Take him with you. My grandparents are buried in CA and I havenāt visited their grave in almost 2 years. It sucks and I wish I had their ashes
Truly sorry for your loss. GF should not have any say in how you lay your son to rest. Soon to be ex gave up any say when he stepped out on you and your kids. 
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I am confusedā¦did the son or soon to be ex pass away?
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What would he want? Personally I would keep him intact whether cremated or buried
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Lay your baby down to rest. And you can tell your ex a friend of yours told him to go to Hell. 
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What Iām trying to figure is why the dad wants six ways? For mom, dad, girlfriend, and the three kids? Wth? IF I did split it would only be two waysā¦ mom and dadā¦ the gf and those kids are irrelevant ā¦ am I not understanding 
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Bury him so he has a resting place and a place for people to visit him and remember him.
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Who died? The kid or youāre soon to be ex? Either way, itās your call what happens with the person at hand
Do what gives you the most peace, Mama. Sorry for your loss. 
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Hereās another point to considerā¦ Your son had to deal with a divided family, why donāt you just let him be at peace in one piece and not divide his soul, that is if you have a religion
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Sounds like it was the ex who has passed away. They were planning to get divorced this year as their youngest child turned 18. But the ex passed away. The exās gf is wanting to cremate him into 6 ways where as the āex wife (still married but separatedā wants him layed to rest.
Girlfriend has ZERO say.
Anything he suggested that may have been influenced by her just needs to fly on by.
You do what you want to do.
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So your legal husband passed away right?
You get the final say HOWEVER since he has 6 children I would split the ashes among them and they can each spread them, keep them, or bury them if they want
Cremation, he is always with you. Split into two urns and let them split his half!
The girlfriend has absolutely no right to say how YOUR son should be laid to rest. If your ex bf has been gone, itās your choice. Nobody elseās.
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If you donāt want h cremated then donāt. You lay him to rest the way you feel he should be!!!
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Itās YOUR sonā¦and if dad wasnāt in the picture then tough luck for himā¦you make the decision NOT HIS girlfriendā¦periodā¦
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So sorry for your loss. But you know, alot of people split ashes, in vials between kids and stuff.
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I am so very sorry. I am praying for you.
Depends on whoās it is thatās passed away , the ex or the son ?? Iām confuzzled
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Just get some fake ashes to give them and bury your son as you see fit.
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The girlfriend shouldnāt have any say in this. You and āalmost exā need to compromise and figure out a solution.
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You and the ex husband need to make the decision and leave her out of it as yāall are legally the next of kin
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Parent first ! Piss on the rest
She states theyāre having a disagreement on āhow to lay our son to rest,ā so yes it is their son not the hubby. Prayers
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If you were still legally married at the time of his death you get to make the decisionsā¦sorry for your loss prays for you and the kids
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It is not her son it is her soon to be X
I know it says lay the son to rest but the other parts make it sound like the dad/husband passed away
Legally he is your husband and u have the final say of what happens to him. Put him in the ground pour some concrete and life goes on
Prayers Mama you just do whatever seems fit for you and your family and donāt let the girlfriend get in the way of your decision making for you and your almost ex husbandās deceased son.
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You and your ex have say, the girlfriend does not. Your choice.
Lay him to rest as your heart desires!! The children can visit his graveš
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I donāt even know why tf your posting this and asking for advice i mean cāmon are you for real and to say the GiRLFRiEND wants to do??.. Omg why are you even listening to her shit as for the father No she didnāt take him away he chose to leave he made that choice on his own so get that one right ā¦
So where your sons concern you make all the arrangements
Yāall she clearly says āmy almost ex and I are disagreeing on HOW TO LAY OUR SON TO RESTā can yāall read?
To the momma. Heās your son. You do what u think is right for him. If the girlfriend wants the kids to have something she can take them to his resting place to visit
Iāll say a prayer for you over your loss. Iām sorry.
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I believe he can be at rest if he is cremated.
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Iām so sorry for your loss.
I donāt know about burying vs splitting the ashes. But it should be between you and your ex, not the gf. It sounds like your son wasnāt close or didnāt really know the gf and her kids, so I donāt think Iād split the ashes between them if thatās what you end up doing
Not sure Iām reading this correctā¦ what I gathered was you and your sonās father canāt agree on how to bury or cremate your sonā¦ your exās girlfriend has 3 kids and the girls friend wants the ashes split between you, dad, herself and her kidsā¦ if this is correct, girlfriend can kick rocks because itās not her child, this is between you and your sonās father. I would personally bury him so he can be visited by everyone and have a final resting placeā¦ Iāve seen too many accidents happen with ashes or they get left somewhere or the urn is broken etcā¦ and I donāt feel splitting ashes is a good idea.
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Im so sorry for your loss.
Im not sure why the dads gf would think she has a say in anything. Do what you think is best. Follow your heart. Sending prayers
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Firstly- what did the kid want? 2nd- NOT UP TO GF OF DAD SHE ISNT A PARENT in this.
Period
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This is a one time occasion and heās your son, end of discussion. Say NO to girlfriend she can visit his grave.
My sincerest condolences to you.
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hell no. sheās GIRLFRIEND. you are WIFE whether itās soon to be ex wife or not. YOU get final say. idgaf what that lady wants/thinks
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Nextg of kin is who makes the decision. If they are not married, she has no say whatsoever.
I would split the ashes. We buried Momās ashes, I got a 6" urn and my sister made some of her ashes into a glass/ash necklace.
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He is your son, yours and your soon to be ex this is nothing to do with the girlfriend at all, i am so very sorry for your loss, maybe she can have a photo and can visit his final resting plave, x
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I personally would never ever split my baby up
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If his father hasnāt been there and you have you make the decision.
Do whatever you feel is the right thing, your son will be guiding you and with you all the way.
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You brought him into this world you can say how he is put to rest. Please remember his soul is in heaven what is done with his remains is and should be left to the ones who loved him. Sending you prayers
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Lay your son to rest peacefully if thatās what you wish to do!! Idgaf what your husband/ex or his gf has to say!! 1. He was never around so why should he have a say now? 2. Just who the hell does she think she is?!?! 3. Thatās yāallās son NOT hers!!! May God be with you, Death brings out the ugly in people!! Stand your ground for your baby Moma!!
I have no advise. I just wanted to write that I am so so so sorry for your loss.
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He didnāt bother his kid while alive, i donāt think he has any say now that heās passed
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I am so sorry for your loss. If your sonās father wasnāt in his life than you should choose how to put him to rest.
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