I only read the first sentence to give you this answer: you are wrong. Sorry!
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Depends on if they live with you or not. Plus, boyfriend, is not husband. If he didnât want to give you his last name, why are you even obligated to buy as much for his child? Now, if youâre married, Iâd say yes dead wrong.
Keyword: Boyfriend!! Your only priority is your child!! Youâre not married to him so thatâs not your problem!! Might sound harsh but thatâs the reality!
But a lot of people like to play âhouseâ nowadays so idk what kinda rules they made upâŚ
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This makes me feel sad for the step daughterâŚ
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My husband alotted a certain amount for each of our kids. He got 15 gifts for his daughter and my sonâs list came to 4 items for the same amount. My son was very happy with 4 as he got just what he wanted.
Why is dad expecting you to buy everything. Doesnât he work? If the child lives with you both then the kids should get the same amount but daddy needs to be a man and make sure hes spending the money just as much as you are. It goes both ways. Is he not buying presents for your child as well. Some advice, if heâs not helping pay then you got your answer for what he wants you around for. Dead beat.
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Why doesnât he buy her more presents if heâs that upset about it? Does he have a job?
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I would tell him if he is upset about it to buy more toys for her. Yes you should buy her toys as well as your child but itâs not your job in my opinion to make sure she has as many toys as he wants her to have. I think itâs his.
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I think they should be treated equally but you are still gonna do what you want either way
Put your foot down⌠your one and only priority is your child. On and off boyfriend and his family and drama need to focus on themselves.
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Not at all. I dont always have all equal for my own three.
What about him why doesnât he buy gifts for his kid?
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If you are not married, and the child does not live with you, then not your responsibility. HIS childâs Christmas is the job of him and the childâs mother.
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OkâŚfirst of all if you are with a man, his children are now yoursâŚyou treat them the same, if you buy your child a certain amount of gifts, you do the same for his child(your bonus child) their is no mine, and his they now become ours!! Grow up!!
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Treat them equal in my eyes thatâs just not fair!
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Your obligation is to your child first and foremost. And for starters heâs your boyfriend not your husband. If I were you I would move on theres no point wasting your like away on a on and off relationship.
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If youâre with someome that has a child, especially if youâve been together longer then a year, you should treat that child like your own. Or you have no business being with someone that has a child. How can you take on a step parent role but not treat that child like your own? My kids dads gf, theyâve been together 5 years, and sheâs never treated my kids any different then her own child. When they have Christmas at their dads and her place, they have all kinds of presents just like her son and their daughter. They May not be legally married, but she got with their dad in a long term committed relationship and took on that step mom role for them and so treats them like hers and doesnât treat them like less because theyâre not biologically hers. Honestly you donât sound like you should be with someone that has a child. How would you feel if he was buying more presents for his child then he would yours? Because well thatâs not his biological child. Why would he treat your child close to the same as he treats his
When you count hers. from her mon what is the count.If she lives with you try to keep it close.
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Kick him to the curb!!! Heâs acting like a spoiled ass brat. Your child (no matter who the dad is), should be your # 1priority over a âboyfriendâ anyday!!! 
A man who is jealous of a child is not the man for you.
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First of all, your first priority is your child, you are not m married and does he buy your daughter gifts? And why is it your responsibility to buy his kids the gifts. He is the father. He sounds like a loser to me. Move on
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Doesnât his child get gifts from her mother and his family, momâs family and from dad? And your child gets from you and your family? He needs to be helping provide Christmas for his child not just you. My kids get more for Christmas than my step children who we have to mail things to since theyâre out of state. His girls get from us, his parents, their mom and their moms family. My kids get from me and my family, so if I personally buy them more itâs still less than the girls get in total.
There are obstacles that stand in the way sometimes of someone loving anotherâs child as their own. Especially when you deal with a high conflict birth parent that makes damn sure the children treat you as a nothing.
If the kids are opening gifts together definitely should be the same amount of gifts. You have to take the childâs feelings in consideration.
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If you are with a person, their children are your children. Period. I mean if you remind that little girl that she isnât yours, sheâll probably hate you. 𤡠I have personally been the step child and it hurts when a parent emphasizes âstepâ or âsheâs not mineâ. No. Donât make her feel that way. Sheâs your daughter too. She didnât ask to be in her situation, she canât control her parents, and it sounds like sheâs already having a rough time with them. The least you can do is love her.
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Thatâs not how family works sorry.
I personally would be buying them the same. Even if it meant less for all kids. You chose this man and his child, if youâre serious about him. You need to treat that child like yours. Heâs not asking you to pay for his family but that child is your family. Your childâs family. Grow up.
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How about discussing it BEFORE! This can cause a lot of problems in mixed families. Does he pitch in money? Do they buy your daughter Xmas gifts? Xmas shouldnât be scoreboarding. When did it become your job alone.
It honestly depends l think as to wether or not your live with your partner. If he is just a boyfriend then no it is not your responsibility. However if you live together and are a blended family, then if they are both children, then you need to be as fair as possible. Also l would offer that he gives you money to make Xmas more equal for his child if he doesnt like it. Goodluck
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Lord. On and off for 5 years. Yet u still dont act like that child is ur own. I tell u what. Even if me and a man was on and off Iâd still buy his kids the same amount as mine. Because to me thatâs alot of time to sit and get attached to a child.
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The two of you as a COUPLE are (assuming you live together) responsible for buying both children an equal amount of gifts. It doesnât matter if she lives there or not. You are both seen as parent figures and should give equal amounts of gifts to each of the children.
Imo you are wrong. You should be treating his daughter as your own.
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Honey you need a reality check! WOW just WOW
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Yeah hun your in the wrong here. Same number of gifts for all the children. It isnât your burden to buy them all he should be helping with all expenses. But I really think you are so wrong here. And your bf is spot on. Kudos for him for being an advocate for his children he shouldnât have to advocate against you though.
Her question includes the words âboyfriend on and offâ and financially support his family" maybe the guy just wants her to buy a bunch of gifts which takes away from her own daughter that she has worked and saved to buy for
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Wow. Maybe he should be with a woman that will treat all children the same.
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If yâall live togetherâŚyâall should be pulling resources together and spending the same on both children, together. If he has no resources, but yâall live togetherâŚthen yesâŚit is your responsibility. Not fair to the other kid. All that being saidâŚsounds like youâd be better off ending the relationship permanently, rather than the on again, off again shituation. Seems like itâs toxic for everyone involved, and there is some resentment present. Youâd think after 5 yearsâŚyou would see his kid as your ownâŚbut thatâs not the case.
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When you start a relationship with someone that has kids your treat them ALL EQUALLY!! PERIOD. Hell yeah I would be pissed too.
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omg my partner has 5 kids and I have one and 2 together they are all treated the same and loved so very much they have to mums and a great dad.even my own daughter her dad is great to get.were adults we do the talking but I wouldnât leave any of them out wen I took on my partner to love I also took on his kids.the kids didnt ask for any of this.
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You are in the wrong. Buy them equal amount of gifts. Not sure how thatâs supporting his whole family⌠rude & hurtful.
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I mean⌠is your bf buying your kid gifts? (Or are we just not going to talk about that idea?) are you guys serious? Does your baby daddy buy his daughter gifts? Are you the only one buying her gifts? Is boyfriends baby mama buying his kid gifts? Is his family buying both kids gifts or just his? Yâall wanna act like it should be equal but we donât have the whole story. If sheâs the only one getting presents for her daughter but he got his baby mama, and his whole family buying his kid gifts but not her kid and her kid still gets more then no. I donât think youâre in the wrong. But if itâs not just you then I donât see why you both canât get each kid something to make it more even.
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Each kid should be treated fairly. Itâs completely wrong to shut a child out just because they arent biologically yours.
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One gift from you is more than enough
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When in a relationship with a man with childrenâŚyou are in the relationship with the child as well. How would you feel if he bought his kid more than yours?
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We made sure that our roommates daughter had a good Christmas along with our son whats wrong with you selfish much? That baby comes with the boyfriend. Thatâs just so wrong on so many different levelsâŚ
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My SO has a baby with someone else but she also had kids from someone else b4 him and since he raised the 2 boys even tho not his own when me and him met they still wanted a relationship with him and i welcomed them with open arms. When his ex had another baby by someone else 3 yrs after me and him were together we also welcomed her with open arms. Not fair 2 raise the boys and leave her out and this was Christmas last yearâŚ
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Damn
I started dating my husband 10 years ago we have been married for a year now and he has a son which is now my step son we have identical twin daughters who are 7 and my step son who is 21 now each child gets the exact same amount of present from us and even if we werenât married and just dating it would still be the same as it is now
Why should 1 child be treated differently because they are not biologically your
Thatâs how the child gets hurts feelings and thinks you donât like or care about them
Now this was just the gifts from me and him for the kidsâŚthese dont include the gifts from santaâŚthey each get in total about 20-25 gifts dependingâŚand this is for his kid my kid and 3 that are neither mine or hisâŚkids do not ask 2 be brought into this world and if u cant have compassion then date a man with no kids
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Tell him to pony up to the degree that you have. Not? Then donât worry about it.
WOW⌠You are beyond selfishâŚwtf is wrong with you!!!
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Girls these days smh.
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No you are not wrong his daughter is not your daughter and you guys are not married so why are you obligated to get his daughter the same amount of gifts. It would be different if you guys were married, but your not married so your daughter is your only priority your boyfriend should be glad that you at least get her things for Christmas cuz you are not obligated to get her anything. I think if he is going to act like that then you need to dump his ass he is being rude and disrespectful he has no right you are not his wife he has no right to tell you what to do.
Edit: I read it as first that your boyfriend was upset because he didnât get as many presents as your daughter. It is absolute bull to get your daughter more presents than his daughter. If you donât want to buy for your spouses kids then you need to choose one without any kids.
My kids get 5-10 presents each(it was 10 when my daughter was an only child). My husband and I get 1-2 each. And everyone gets stockings filled
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Just leave him. Itâll give him a chance to find a loving woman who will treat his kid like her own
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You should treat them the same
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Shes not her kid theyâre not married why is she responsible for someone elses kid until theyâre married I dont see why shes wrong
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His issue, not yours
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If hes treating your kids the same as his, which Iâm guessing hes not.
Not your issue, itâs his.
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Awe poor kiddo just buy his child presents, the joy of a child getting something from who isnât biologically family is priceless 
Thatâs not how it works.
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Each child should be treated fairly and it depends on the arrangement with the other childs mum. If they just get their own kids then she gets the same as your daughter if they go halfs she obviously doesnt x
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Lmao this is how my man is. So fricken weird to me I was raised different I guess???!?
Yes! You are extremely wrong! And not to be a jerk, but⌠my opinion from being the woman on the other side! You are selfish⌠and if you canât love his child like yours then break up! You have no business being with someone with kids if you can be this selfish
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My head hurts from this. JFC. Kids donât see themselves as ânot yoursâ or ânot hisâ so they will not understand why theyâre getting less presents than the other. Unless the gifts are not expensive. Thatâs not ok. Either give your child some presents when the other child isnât around or make it equal. My son is 8 and gets less presents because he likes expensive stuff rather than my 3yr old daughter but we spend the same amount on both kids. It sounds resentful to the child and itâs frankly not fair. They didnât pick who their parents were going to be or what situation they are growing up in.
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You shouldnât be with someone who has kids period! And I hope no one ever treats your daughter like that!
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Itâs depends on the living situation. If yâall live together, and both girls live with yâall, then they should be treated equal⌠as long as heâs contributing financially. If heâs not, kick him to the curb!
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And for the people saying sheâs right I hope your kids never have to be step kids! Yâall are sad seriously!
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Why donât you just have your daughter open a few presents before the other child gets there for visitation I mean Christmas is for the children at the end of the day and you wouldnât want to make anyone feel left out especially when they are a member of your family and look to you as a stepmother figure.
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If you give all the presents to your child in front of the otherâŚthatâs super fucked up and just cruel.
If you do it when the other child isnât present to see, you are fine. Itâs really that simple.
And all the people talking about the same dollar amount, I donât understand that. My kids always cared about having the same number of presents. They donât understand spending equal dollar amounts until they are a lot older/more mature.
buy them both presents equally.for god sakes they are kidds.this shouldnât even be an issue .thatâs how hoosiers think.
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I would say â give me the money and Iâll buy your daughter all the presents you want her to have.
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Itâs not the childs fault and no child should feel left out on christmas⌠My theory buy for 1 buy for all unless the other child will not be there for the holiday then thatâs different
If youâre not going to do for his like you do yours then you dont belong apart of their life. Youâre selfish af. Sheâs a child and deserves to be treated better than that it isnât her fault who her mother is.
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Nichole Kennedy thank you for NEVER acting this petty. Thank you for taking our big man in as your own from day 1 and never treating him any different than yours.
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Youâre a shitty human.
And your SO has every right to be mad.
You donât do that.
You donât just damage a child for no reason because âsheâs not yours.â
You wanna play wife to a man with a child, better get the mommy hat out too⌠theyâre a package, sis.
Check yourself.
If he is your boyfriend and you have your own job and money tell him he can buy what ever he wants with his money , and you can do what you want with yours!
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Your wrong, your selfish and not nice to that child, 
the kid has nothing to do with anything a KID IS A KID i think you need to be a lot more mature. 
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If you and him live together and baby mama lives else where than it doesnât matter what she dies or doesnât get the child. His presents at her house has NOTHING to do with whats at yâalls house. Thats petty as hell and you should feel ashamed of your self. If you are with him then you are with ALL of him which includes his DAUGHTER! Why dont you step back and think about how that child feels or how dad feels if his daughter ask why she dont get as many gifts as her brother/sister? What is dad suppose to say? Well you dont get as many bc you are not my gf bio child? Tf!
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Is his child going to be around when ur child is opening their gifts? Is he contributing towards gifts at all or just you? If you want to spoil ur child then you have every right to do so!!! After all itâs Christmas⌠if the other child is around and you bought more for them then just have them open the rest of their gifts when the other child isnât around anymore⌠he probably just views it as a fairness situation⌠and doesnât want his child to feel left out over it and thatâs not kool so just do it privately
If your going to be in a long term relationship with someone than you should treat his kid equal to yours. You seem like a selfish woman that only cares about the your daughter. I think if you want to ever marry you gotta change your attitude toward step children. They are equally as your children as they are his. And if you dont want to be fair than donât expect him to be fair. And thatâs the way the cookie crumbles!
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Thatâs his child, he can buy her whatever he wants but he shouldnât expect for you to buy his daughter a bunch of stuff! NEVER take care of a âmanâ or his family!
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If the child lives with you ide say same amount
Same amount it is only fair âŚthey are kids
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if you are a blended family, when its time to open gifts together it should be equal
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Treat them the same, when you blend families it should be the same
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- Youâre a rude and possibly a selfish stepmom.
- Shes a child. Every child deserves the same care, presents and love as any others.
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Selfish, petty and just plain wrong. Shame on you
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Wow just wow. Youâre so wrong and I hope you realize that.
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If Youâre in a relationship with him then you are with his child . I have 2 littles and 2 stepsons and they are all treated and get equally . Itâs a real shitty feeling as a child to see favoritism.
Wow thatâs a lot of negative comments considering the poster left out some important info! Like do they live together? How many kids does he have? How often does she see them? If he has four kids and she only sees them every other weekend, how is that even to her child? Just seems like a vague post that apparently people took as selfish!
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In short that Seems very Petty and childish of you. Itâs not like heâs asking you to support his daughter throughout the year this is for Christmas and you should make Christmas fair for both children. This is not about excluding one child or another and making one child feel less than another or more important than another and your boyfriend has every right to be upset with you if he wouldnât be upset with you I would question him as a father. Especially if both kids are spending Christmas at yâallâs house. You are WRONG here.
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Wow mommy fucking dearest over here normally I would try to be understanding questions because we feel the way we feel but I have to honestly say this one pissed me off my sisterâs dad would buy me the same thing as my sister every year and he would call me his kid he wasnât even with my mom and only saw me for an hour ever month. Hell I even bought my kids best friend as many presents
Yeah u buy your daughter he buys for his smh
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Uhm confused
Does his child live with you and your daughter? If yes you are being kinda mean⌠but if the kid does not live with youâŚwhy the hell would you buy a ton of gifts to be at someone elses house for a kid you barely see? Did he contribute to gifts for your kid? Theres a lot of questions I have
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Heâs your boyfriend not your husband. How is his family automatically yours? I donât get it. I feel that one should not have buy love.
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So much missing information that would change my answer. If yall are not married or even considering it itâs not your job to support his kid. Get her a couple things sure⌠but that is his responsibility to buy his kid presents. He is free to buy his kid all the presents he wants
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Iâm a step mom & in our household we keep things as fair as possible.
Does his child live with you / him? If not I could see that being a reason.
If the child is living in our household then itâs equal, equal. But if the father and I live together but the child lives with itâs mother, then itâs his and the mom business to do the X-mas for that child, I would buy what I want for the child⌠if I and him donât live together then thatâs on them. Iâll but A gift and that it!!!
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I donât know but a lot of women eat a lot of shit from these men just to have that man. Iâm not going to put up with all these Shenanigans and then try to make me feel guilty for what I could do for my child that their baby mama and them canât do for thereâs just because we are together
On and off again boyfriend? Does she get a Christmas with her mom too? If so, I wouldnt worry about providing equal gifts too much as long as both children are happy and healthy.
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I agree with you. That child has a mother and father who is in her life and itâs their responsibility to provide for her not yours. Anything you do is on a voluntary basis. If he wants her to have the same as yours then he should make up the difference.
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