Sisters before misters. Dump that man ASAP.
Thatâs awful. If itâs still an issue a year later it will always be an issue. You need to decide if you can deal with for the rest of your life. If not move on.
You were on a break,
Dump him and donât look back.
Its done move on .you will never be ok with it and nor should you be.your self worth is more than that.
Once a cheater always s cheater
He gets mad about it because he doesnât care love ⌠please donât let this continue to destroy you
All you need to do is get over HIM!! Throw the boy in the trash and start over with a man who will value you enough to atlesst be honest.
Time to leave and not look back.
No man is worth losing your peace over. We only have one life so donât stress over anyone. Move on. It will never get better, just worse.
He ruined your relationship. And you wonât ever got over it because he lied about it and would have continued to lie had you not found out. And he isnât sorry about it because if he was he would be reassuring you and allowing you to talk to him openly about it anytime rather than flipping out on you when heâs the one who did something really messed up. He doesnât deserve you, you deserve better.
She was never truly your best friend if she slept with him. Period. Sorry it was a double loss for you. Personally I would never really get over it. True colors. Harsh but true
He sounds like real fucking piece of shit. You should flush that turd right away.
Nope! But good luck!
Nope. Move onâŚfrom both of em
I can feel the sorrows while reading your message⌠betrayal and loosing a friendđ Forgive her as she has passed away. First, Love yourself. Forgive your bf, but move on as well. Youâll find someone again. Until then take your time to heal yourself, and love yourself.
The hurt will never go away. It will always remain an issue. And if you marry him heâll cheat on you. Cut ties now and begin the healing process.
Save yourself and leave.
Sorry for the loss of your friend⌠Were you able to forgive your departed friend? Do you miss her or feel guilty? You may be looking for some closure on your friendshipâŚ
Dont let this eat at you⌠there are other fish in the sea. If you cant get over him then move on and let it all rest
Why the hell are you still with his sorry ass
Take another break and think it through. Maybe he will cheat again and not come back anyway
Bye ⌠to those 2 Trust me youâre never going to get over it before you lose your mind shame on her!!
Itâs very unfortunate she passed and my condolences to her family⌠But ⌠he still slept w her and lied about it. You definitely shouldnât have taken him back so easily bc once he gets away w it once then thereâs a chance it will happen again.
You will never regain that trust. Iâve been in a similar situation and you will never look at him the same way again. Not to mention how shitty it makes you feel, you deserve happiness and youâll never get it with him.
Time to go , he canât take his bag , and you canât forgive to stay in relationship, its done did move on
This must be a teenager who writes this shit ,I canât imagine a grown woman putting this on social media
Get rid of both of them
Forgive yourself for taking him back. maybe get some counseling for yourself while you cut him off
Theres only 1thing to do⌠the alternative is this, forever
Thatâs not something thatâs easily forgivable on either part. Why would you friend sleep with him? Thereâs a rule within friendship is there not? Iâm sorry she passed away, that would of added to your feeling of betrayal aswell but I think it will always be in your mind nagging at you. And him well dam he should of been honest but they never see fault in themselves. Best of luck to you
You gotta literally tell him how you feel. You gotta tell him allllll of that. Make him understand damn well what the repercussions of that are, and that if he wants to be with you, he might have to deal with some shitty aftermath of his actions that has now affected his relationship.
Leave now. Heâs a loser.
You need to leave him because you will never get over it. Itâs going to eat you away if you stay.
Sorry she passed away but sounds like 50% of the problem took care of itself. Now only to get rid of him.
Trust me. Run. And donât look back. He not only cheated, he lied and then has the audacity to insist you âget over itâ and get angry at you for his betrayal. You deserve respect and honesty. Without trust youâve got nothing. You will never âget overâ it or be okay or feel secure, in that relationship.
I am also very sorry for the woman who passed away. That is tragic.
He ruined it not you
In going to be the odd one.
Not only did ur bf cheat on u; which is INCREDIBLY difficult to overcome as a married couple than just bf/gf in itselfâŚ
Ur also grieving the loss of a best friend, a person u loved and than person u held a grudge against or hated after, a person u couldnât trust and than a person u lost
To me ur first step is to forgive your passed friend not just say u do bc she is deceased but actually forgive her for giving up on ur friendship
Than If you REALLY want to try and forgive ur bf⌠U need separate counselling and than together counselling.
I mean you were 'broken up" and if this were a âRoss and Rachelâ situation, we could easily say u werenât together so âtechnicallyâ he didnât cheat.
Sorry ur going through this.
It is a shame that your BFF passed. But I guarantee you would have cut ties with her like you were drowning and she was an anchor.
Iâm not being cold, Iâve seen it dozens of times.
But, at this point, you have nobody to blame but himâŚand if his whole input to this is to âget over itâ, I would lay $$ is down that he has since, or is currently cheating.
Let him go.
Get therapy (not for that pos, for yourself and your grief)
Nope⌠its been a year ?
If youâre not over it by now, sorry dont think you can. I couldnt either, but I wouldâve never gave him a chance after I found out
Itâs like thisâŚyou found out plenty early enough to get out of both their lives. If you stay its always going to eat at you . At least you found out early enough to make a choice, at least it wasnât 20 yrs and the truth pops out and you feel like youâve lived a lie and wasted your time in a relationship that was built on betrayal.
Just walk away ur mental health far more valuable than a relationship
How can you not know what to do, your feelings say it all!
Iâm sorry, but itâs already over.
I am old. Life is too short to deal with that shit. Get on with your life. You really donât need him even though you think you do. Walk away and donât look back.
Werenât they split up? Dude can do what he wants
Nope. You are worth more than that. Heâs using you for something. Get out and feel better about yourself. You donât deserve that
He loses his shit about it and your the one who got cheated on!!! What the actual f. You donât need to get over it you need to get over his worthless ass. Heâs a waist of your time. Like your Is literally wasting your time staring in that relationship. He didnât care about you when he was all up in your friend so heâs absolute trash. If heâs OK with doing that to you then heâs probably been doing it since. Leave now for your own mental health because he is going to destroy you mentally
He slept with your BEST FRIEND AND THEN LIED TO YOU ABOUT IT!!! Clearly he has no boundaries and he definitely does NOT love you!
And now that he knows that he can disrespect you and get away with itâŚhe will most likely continue to cheat on you.
Iâm sorry but thatâs the truth. Leave him. You deserve better!
And Iâm sorry for your lossâŚof your friend.
The way I see it is that he didnât actually cheat if you werenât together. Itâs still a very sad situation, and if there is no trust, there is no relationship. He lied about it which is the unforgivable part to me.
Well my now ex-husband of over a decade slept with my so I thought best friends of 20 years (and MANY) other people. The short answer is NO! That level of betrayal is so deep, painful, and cruel. Im now divorced from him I have a partner I love have children with ect. Been in counseling for years have zero feelings for my ex but the pain of betrayal and trust issues to are still there. We had children together so I still have to deal with him. So the honest truth is you can never fully move forward when that level of trust and respect is broken I feel like you would always wonder in the back of your mind. Trust your gut and move on. You are worth more then that
Trust is gone no getting over it say bye bye
Move on without them two. You will find someone much better in both positions the friend and boyfriend I promise.
Leave him. And donât ever look back.
Time to love yourself and move on kiddo. He doesnât deserve your forgiveness.
Yâall werenât together so he didnât cheat but itâs really crappy that he slept with your friend and honestly was she a friend if she was able to do that to you?
Move on. If you havenât been able to get over it after a year then you never will. Itâs better to start fresh with a new relationship then to keep being upset over it
There are boundaries and he crossed the line even if your friend is now gone⌠he lied to you, he will do it again⌠and clearly there are no boundaries for him ,he crossed the line already so donât be surprised if he sleeps with someone else who is close to you⌠you need to love yourself more.
Leave. Thats a shame that either one would do that.
Sounds like you need some better people in your life.
Move on , new chapter
Girl LEAVE. Donât look back. Imagine all of the other things he will lie to you about if you continue to stay.
Not worth staying with him whatâs to say he will do it again move on your better than that Iâm sorry to hear about your friend though I no itâs not what you expected but they both did play you
My bf could never sleep with any of my friends, bc if they sleep with my bf they were never my friend. Also sorry your friend passed before you got to cope with it.
She ainât your friend, and he ainât no good. Ditch them both
Without trust you have nothing , move on and foces on yourself.
I think itâs time to walk away. Thereâs over 7 billion people in the world, you really donât have to settle for one fella who lied to your face the day youâs got back together. Respect yourself and donât accept that kind of bullshit
Out the door if it was me
Donât even waste your time, eliminate both from your life.
Donât waste your time, itâs not worth it.
Unfortunately no, you can forgive them both and try to let it go but it will never stop bothering you. You were lied to and hurt, those feelings you have wonât change no matter how hard you try, youâll always think about it even if you donât want to. My ex cheated on me with one of my friends, I forgave them both yet somehow it crossed my mind at random times pretty frequently and after years of it never stopping I finally left. The memory will always hurt especially if youâre still trying to love him, Iâm sorry.
I think you need a fresh start for yourself that doesnât include him.
A relit cigarette will never taste the same and that is all that one should say about re-lighting old flames. Run and burn that bridge, and the friend has gotta go too, any real friend would never do that
Once a liar, always a liar ! You cannot trust him. Move on to find someone who truly loves and respects you.
No you wonât. Betrayal like that will be repeated if itâs allowed.
NOPE! Never. You can convince yourself you will, but it will seep into everything. Find someone who has respect for you. Cheating period is fâed up but cheating with a bff? thatâs a WHOLE other level.
Well despite her death, she wasnt a friend. Heâs a pig, donât join his pigeon. Find better.
Your relationship was ruined when he decided to sleep with your friend.
Iâm sorry but he is telling you to get over it when he clearly did something wrong. I doubt it will stop there. U âforgaveâ him once with your friend, in his eyes, sadly it may happen again since he didnât have any consequences. Iâd say leave and find someone who values u.
Karmas a bitch lol leave his ass
Girl. Why you gotta get over it? Why canât you move on? Why keep yourself in that kinda struggle? Thatâs called struggle love. Be glad you ainât married to him! Let him do him, cause obviously thatâs what he gonna do. If you messed around with his friend believe it⌠he wonât âjust get over itâ.
Can only move forward no good looking back!
Say goodbye to the liar
The Issue is he is dishonest. Move on. Be grateful for the Lessons Learned. Now move forward.
Leave, thatâs messed up
Nope, that one will stay with you forever.
Leave! Get out! This will not have a good outcome! Pray a lot!
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Hey group admin how is it you can make comments 20h ago on a post 3mins old?
The fact that he loses his sh*t over it is a red flag for me. Its ok for you to not be ok with it, however uncomfortable it makes him
You canât get over it, you can work through it but never over it.
If he loses his shit at you over you mentioning it then he isnât the one for you. Your mental health is going to keep declining until something breaks.
I think itâs the lying⌠what else is he lying about?
No you wonât get over it IMO. Heâs a tosser and dosnt care about your feelings. You will resent him more and more and he will just become more of a dick from âsick of hearing about itâ move on the best you can
Get rid canât be trusted Iâm afraid x
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Iâm 66 years old, go now, I spent 28+ years with someone who lied to me, many times, stayed for the children, which was wrong on my part⌠there is someone out there that will truly love n adore you, youâre worth itâŚ
He can say itâs in the past. He can say it was a mistake. Whereas all that may be true, he is not treating you with care in the present. By trying to silence your hurt for his comfort. Since you love him, you may not see him as a bad guy. Maybe he isnât all bad. ButâŚthat whole trauma, that changed everything. Youâre not the same person that loved who you thought he was and what you thought you had. Youâre loving an illusion of the past. It broke that day and itâs gone. Accept it and let yourself hurt and heal. Then move on healthy into a better life without all that baggage of betrayal. Itâs not to punish him or get even. Itâs to be free and not pay the price for what he chose to do. But, only you can decide. It is your life. You donât owe him the sacrifice of misery.
He ruined the relationship because he had to of known what he did would hurt you. If itâs messing with you that bad then itâs time to cut ties. Relationships may be hard work but it shouldnât be stressful, hurtful, and hard to love that person and be with them. You should know that even if you have differences or an argument, that yâall can talk about it and get through it. Itâs time to find someone to love you wholeheartedly with respect
Life is too short to settle. Move on now without him. Hold yourself to higher standards period. Sleeping with your best friend shows a complete lack of respect for you as a person (whether you were on a break or not). In general, people treat us how we allow them to treat us. You are allowing him to disrespect you and he will continue to do it as long as you allow it. When youâre in a solid relationship built of trust and respect, you donât have to question it, itâs not hard, and you simply enjoy it. This is not a solid relationship. Care more about yourself. Hold yourself to higher standards and find a man deserving of you. This is not that man.
I wouldnât waste my time on someone who not only lied to you but also slept with one of your best friends. Thatâs pretty awful. And on top of that, HE loses HIS shit if you want to talk about it? HELL NO. Talk about nerve. You deserve better than him. Being ALONE would be better than him. Heâs not worth the drama, TRUST ME.
What he did was so disrespectful. Itâs nothing to get over. He wants what he wants, doesnât care what you want, and wants you to be perfectly okay with that. No maâam. How does it get better from here? Thatâs why you canât get over it. You donât think it can get better either.
Honestly, if itâs a relationship ur serious about - consider counseling. You were atleast broken up but the fact that he was coming to see you that night is what would get to me the most. It really depends how much you want the relationship. I would consider the fact that u were broken up as well - I fully get why you feel the way you do. You have a right to your feelings but itâs hard to even discuss it from both sides without someone as a mediator & of course other friends & family will have their own opinions - counseling is best. You just have to decide if itâs worth it or not