Meet in the middle. Pick a town between the 2 of yours! 50/50 for both of you😁 new place, new beginning…new chapter
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Never move away from your family. Never allow yourself to get in an isolating situation.
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I think you already know what the answer is. Trust your gut. Best of luck
When in doubt DON’T DO IT
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Dont give up your security. Meaning your home and all that you have.
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If it doesn’t feel right then don’t do it!! Your gut is telling you:pray:
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your feelings are valid…
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Not a good idea for many reasons. You already know this though
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Do not do it, it does not feel right.
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NO, Please! The other answers are excellent!!
We have you asking for advice you grown
Nope. Nope. And more nopes.
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Don’t move in with a guy because it’s “convenient” for him. Moving SHOULD be convenient for everyone, but it’s not. It’s not convenient for you. Don’t let him pressure you into doing something that is giving you anxiety. If you feel like you are giving up everything and gaining nothing, it’s NOT RIGHT FOR YOU. You’ve been with one abuser. Don’t let this guy control you by dismissing your feelings and needs. That’s not a relationship.
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Honey listen to your gut don’t do it and if he tries to guilt you into it run.
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A little one sided I would say no plenty of fish in the sea
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If in doubt, don’t do it. This is one of those life decisions where you HAVE to be 100% positive that it’s what you want. If there is any doubt, you’ll be miserable, and eventually resentful. Just tell him you aren’t ready yet. If he truly cares about you, he will accept your decision.
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Learn from your past experience, you said
It already, your giving up everything? Work on you and your child, not a relationship that could end and you be where you not wanted if it goes south…
You’re still healing from your last relationship. You already have a 2 hr commute for custody drop off/pick up. You’ve had so much anxiety over the situation, you haven’t ate in days. You need to put your child & you first. Your child comes before any man!! If he really loves you, he’ll move closer to where you are. You need to be w someone who isn’t going to rush you into moving in together or moving away from your family. Whom you need
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If it doesn’t feel right, dont do it
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Causing anxiety… don’t do it
Trust your gut honey!
Follow your heart, do what is best for you.
Trust yourself. If your not sure dont do it.
If you don’t want to move, DON’T. There is alot of change for you and you’re finally standing on your own 2 feet after a tough relationship. There is nothing wrong with living separately for a while longer. All relationships are based on compromise which neither of you seem to want to do at the moment and dating after children and a failed relationship is so much harder. Sounds like you aren’t ready to take the leap, so I wouldn’t.
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Wait until you have no doubts! If you decide to make the move and aren’t ready you may regret your choices. When I chose to leave my marriage ( unstable in so many ways) I waited until I was absolutely certain I would not go back. Best life choice for myself and children I could have ever made. Explain your feelings and if he is the right person for you he will be understanding best of luck to you
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Your thoughts & feelings on this matter ARE indeed totally valid! And never hurts to be cautious, since you do not want to have a repeat of your past situation. If you are the one who has to do more work and changes in your life to accommodate him, then it is wrong. Why should you have to give up your support network of being close to your family, and daily life routine that you have worked so hard to establish? If he truly loves and cares for you in all aspects, then he would be happy to find a comprise. And not make you do something you are not comfortable with. You should live separately for a while more.
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Honestly the issues that you list don’t really seem like huge problems to me, but if you don’t want to then, well don’t. Simple as that. And please don’t take this the wrong way but I think you could benefit from counseling. It sounds like you may be working on some larger issues and there’s nothing wrong with getting help
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I wouldn’t do it, Your story has alot of red flags. Why should you be the only one compromising. It sounds like he’s pushing you into it and not taking your circumstances or history into account.
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I too was in a situation where i was kept away for 5 years moved back home.
I had no choice but to move with my now fiance after like 6 months of dating in a town i knew nothing about.
My best advice is don’t do it until you feel comfortable. Take all the time you need. It takes a long time for us to be able to trust again and to realize that not everyone is out to hurt us after we have been in a situation like that.
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You seem to have a lot of doubt…so I say don’t do it…you have been through it seems enough already…You’ll be Surprised by how much you can accomplish on your own …
I wouldn’t. You’re the only one making changes and sacrifices. You’re loosing your support system and all progress you’ve made for yourself. If it doesn’t feel right don’t. Personally I wouldn’t want to rely on someone else to be able to pick up/see my kids either. All he’s gotta do is decide one day he dont feel like taking you and you lose that time. And if that happens it gives your ex leverage in court bcuz you moved further away from them and started missing visits. That’d be a nope all around for me.
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Don’t move! Listen to your gut! Stay strong for yourself and your children!
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Dont Do Something You Don’t Want To Do.Why Should You Make All The Sacrifices!!!
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Why do we as women always so willing to bend for a man,girl get your life
Listen to your intuition and feelings.
Don’t do it,you will be sorry!
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If you have to ask and you’re not sure don’t do it that’s your intuition speaking
From experience. Wait. Make sure you have a plan and a back up plan if you move. I made the mistake of moving in with my boyfriend well ex now and regretted it since the beginning. Good luck
If you are questioning it then you definitely are not ready. I wouldn’t do it.
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Your body is telling you it’s not ready for that step. Listen to yourself
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You are not ready for this yet!!! I see so many red flags in your post!!!
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Excuses… he wouldn’t be able to pick his kid after school (which he hardly ever does anyway.) Honey he sounds like your new mental abuser using manipulation
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Go with your gut. Take it slow.
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He wants control.
He’s emotionally manipulative
He want to be closer to his parents so YOU can help .
With Aging parents the whole thing just snowballs (been there).
He needs to be the one to help his parents and figure out how without twisting up the life you’re trying to simplify .
Good luck 
Stay where you are .
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Similar situation… I moved 3 hours away. Now I am married and have a blended family. The choice made a stable foundation for my daughter and now 7 years later I can look back and realize fear would have robbed me of my blessings… Great husband, beautiful home, step children, my bio children (now full custody) and 3 little children with my husband…along with pets. Only you know what is right for you but don’t let fear take the driver’s seat.
Sounds to me like you are the one getting screwed
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Don’t move for him!!!
Don’t live with anyone wait for marriage.
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Sounds like you already know the answer
Get a mutual place 1/2 way. I wouldn’t do it at all with doubts.
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Don’t do it you aren’t ready
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If you are not ready be honest about it. He is also not a mind reader. If you plan to have a long term relationship open verbal communication is important.
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then just don’t do it…you don’t need the opinions or advice from total strangers. Do what feels right what works BEST for you! DUH!!!
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If you are looking to get custody back then moving farther away is definitely not the answer. Neither is moving in with your boyfriend. Both of these things will work against you. Additionally, your kiddos are living full time with your abuser. Your kids and their safety should be first priority and any other relationship is secondary
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Don’t do it. I moved 45 min from my daughter and lost all my rights till she was 16. Now 7 years later. We have finally solved part of her issues with me.its been a hard road…
Unless you are moving 45 mins closer to your own child it is not the right move. Also, why would you be willing to move away from your support system and family that you have again after 9 years? Please remember there is a difference between boyfriend, and husband. One plays house, the other makes a home. Good luck and God Bless 
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I wouldn’t move and if he won’t then what’s the point of the relationship. You both lose if you leave so it seems that your kids come first not a question if you want them back. Stay where your at
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Whenever I have as many doubts about anything as you have about this, I don’t do it! I believe you’ll be very sorry if you do this. Stay where you are!
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If I were in your shoes I’d tell him that I do want to move in but I need more time to heal from past situations and that I don’t want to move a total of 2.45 hours away from the custody drop off location and that I would like to stay where I’m at because it’s my comfort with being close to my family that I was forced to shut out of my life for so long. I would also tell him that I appreciate his offer to drive me where I need to be due to my car but I much rather do it for myself at this time because I was in a crappy relationship for so long that I need to rebuild myself and get stable for myself and that I do love him and want to be with him but I’m not ready for a living situation change right now because my mental health isn’t what it needs to be at the moment. Or something like that anyway. If he truly loves you and he’s the right one for you he’ll be okay with you not moving in at the moment. If I were you I’d focus on getting my children straight and then reconsider moving in with him based on how he reacts during this healing time for you. If a partner can be supportive and empathetic over your said situation then you have your answer. Do you right now momma and love him as much in the process.
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Sounds like it’s your first relationship after being with the abuser…he should be understanding of your concerns and not wanting to be away from family so soon…if you’re questioning it then you’re not ready…take time for you and focus on your own mental health and little one.
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Both should compromise and get a place half way.
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NO put the attempt of getting ur children first. Stay put show stability of work and home with a support system in place of family.
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My gut says no .to leave all you have worked for dont sit right in the craw
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Why don’t you both move in the middle for a common ground ???
Sounds like you need to take a step back and evaluate things. Sounds 1 sided to me. I say he move to you if he cares that much
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Just my opinion here. I wouldn’t worry about the boyfriend as much as I would do what’s best for getting your babies back. Moving farther away wouldn’t be helpful. I would focus on getting your kids back before moving in with your boyfriend.
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If you arent absolutely sure you want to do this then dont. Your child and what you have to do is the most important. If he truly loves you he can wait until you get custody back
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Put your kids first. If you move further away, you could lose your chance of getting custody. If your bf isn’t willing to work with you on this, then honestly it isn’t the best choice to move in with him. Why risk all you have, just to move in together? I wouldn’t do it.
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I would say no. If you are trying to get yourckida back moving in with him is,not a good idea,at this point. You have to give them a good example.
Convenience is not a reason to move in
If it doesn’t feel right, don’t do it.
If your asking this question, you already know the answer. Don’t do it
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Follow peace,when in doubt toss it out…a man who really loves his woman will come for her…mine did…Colo.to Tx
Always remember your children come first,before anything or anyone!! This is not the right time to move anywhere
Since you two are not married - DO NOT move! Just let him know you refuse to move that far.
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That you even had to ask on here answers your Question. You aren’t ready.
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If you have reservations, don’t do it…
if you have to ask , then your not ready to move in with him…There’s no harm or shame in that.
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Don’t do it think about your kids
No move in with boyfriend
I don’t think that’s a good idea for you specially becauseof custody situation, he can take care of elderly people who really needs his help anywhere he goes. Try talking to him about it, if not than it’s best for you to either wait a little longer or just say goodbye to him. If it was ment to be you’ll end up together. That’s just my opinion.
My late husband always said, when in doubt, don’t.
I was about to say the same thing.
No. What kind of commitment is that?
Communication here is key
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IMO I wouldn’t want to put myself through a similar situation that you just got out of. It sounds like he’s trying to get you to depend on or need him more.
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Don’t do it if u gave a bad feeling tell him he’s needs to met u at half way n ur independent tht u don’t need his car cuz u got urs n sec tell him u want to stay close to ur son if he can’t understand tht then red flag tbere
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Listen to your gut instinct! You raised a plethora of examples there is something there that worries you.
If you are having doubts and questions
Stay where you are to!
Go with your gut
Your kids cone first!
Don’t make the same mistake as many others have and regret it so much!
Hard pass. No. You know this isn’t ok or your wouldn’t be asking.
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Definitely No he is trying to control you
I completely get where ur coming from u need to figure u out to tho n what u want in life n maybe tell him right now is not the best time n to move in ur still getting to know each other
right now it’s about you rebuilding he needs to understand that if it were me I would do what’s best for me because for so long you didn’t get to idk if this helps but ultimately you have to look out for you and what’s best for you in your situation sending good vibes love and light:pray:
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IMO it sounds like he might be trying to alienate you from the family you worked so hard to get back to. Moving further away could cause a custody dispute to get worse as the father could say you moved further away. If your car isn’t good relying on your boyfriend to make the time for you to go get your child for visits if he’s not “great” about picking his own up from school should be some red flags. Go with your gut, follow up with your brain, trust your heart last…that’s the one that usually gets people in trouble. Also, this is based on my experience of making the same mistake twice. There won’t be a third time love and hope to you and your child
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I would put moving in together on hold. Has he proposed ? Has he shown that he not only loves you but your child ? Is he willing to make necessary sacrifices to get your child back into your custody? If he doesn’t make the effort to pick up his own child after school, these would definitely be concerns of mine. Personally, it sounds like you have goals you are working towards and until you have accomplished those goals I would not change your plans. You know where your focus needs to be , don’t allow anyone to distract you from that. Prayers for God to lead your way
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I would just tell him not yet on moving in until you figure more things out. If he loves you he’ll understand and support that.
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Go with your gut!! You’ve rebuilt, don’t move out of your comfort zone.
Single moms have to take care and be stable. I would not move in together. Dont do that to the kids. Men in and out of moms bed…
Slow. Down. Take care of you first.
IMO I don’t think that would help you get any custody at all, and it might be something your abuser could use against you. I would stay until you have custody and if he loves you like he says then he won’t argue and he’ll support your choice.
But honestly if you have to think about it, it probably isn’t a good idea and I think you know that already