What do you mean he won’t let you work? You just go and get a job and line up child care. File for support and move out. There are programs to help you move and get out of this situation. There are programs for child care, food stamps everything. You can do this. I promise. It will be hard. It would be stressful. But you are stronger than you realize.
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Start an only fans, save, take your son and leave or find a different kind of work from home position
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Your his free maid, get out while you can xx
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Toxic. You need to evaluate your long term goals and figure out a plan that doesn’t include your ex.
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Gurl, get a job, get out and put him on child support!!!
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Won’t “let” you?? Girl, you aren’t his property. Get a job and get out
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One word… DIVORCE. Leave his ass. Give him a taste of the real world and see how “easy” you had it. He can do his own damn laundry, cook his own dam food, etc. while trying to work. He’d also have to pay child support.
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Get a work from home job. You’ve got to get your own source of money
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Throw him out. See if your eligible for any government programs. Maybe get a part time job and stick him with the child those days . A afternoon job preferably. Tell him he’s responsible for the supper, the clean up.bed time ritual, Leave a basket of clothes to fold. If he wants to live there your doing his wash and cleaning, he owes you cash in hand. I’d say get rid of him get government assist He has the best of life. Send him home to mama and see how successful he is.
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This is abuse… look up “financial abuse”
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Reality: You are a single mom, not a “stay-at-home mom.” Apply for free headstart for your son, get a job, and get out of this situation.
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Please seek help from your local community centre, women’s refuge or church.
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I would apply for housing and benefits in your state. Since you don’t work you could see about getting child child care to work, section 8 housing, food stamps, medicaid, and help with utilities even. Here in Nebraska where I live there’s a thing called aid to dependant children. This helps you get money through the state to care for your child and bills as long as you go look for a job (or until child support is granted). There is always help and I know not many people like living off of the government. I was and still and one of those people. But after having to leave my relationship and being a stay at home mom, it was my only option. Especially with wanting to go back to school instead of just getting a dead end job that would only have me living pay check to pay check. I would try and apply for these things at your local courthouse or online at home or the public library. Hope this helps.
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I’m just going to say it. This is modern day slavery. You don’t live there “rent free”. You take care of the home. People pay for that, plus housing.
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Girl! You know what you have to do, there is always a way.
I have a solution, but it’s a fëløny.
You have chosen to be dependent on someone. That someone controls you.
I would want my own life, even if I’m a studio apartment.
It is time to get a job and get out.
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Hi I don’t have much but I do know you don’t deserve that life or treatment if you have a venmo account inbox me and I would love to help with something. Maybe to help get your basic toiletries!
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They have all kinds of help out there for women and children … Call the women’s resource Center in your area. They will eve. Help with rent.
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Sounds like you already answered your own question. He is a loser and you need to get a job and move out. He will be one less person to take care of
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Move out and go get a job 
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Go to woman’s aid babe they will help n support u n ur son don’t leave him… I know it sounds so scary but what ur going threw is actually called financial abuse he has u trapped… N has made u feel like there’s no option… Please seek help threw woman’s aid n leave him far behind… U n ur son deserve so much better 
sending so much love ur way xxxxxxxxx
Sounds like my ex run!
211.org was amazing at helping us find resources. I would look for income based housing in ur area as well for u and ur son
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This is financial abuse. You should take your child and go to a dv shelter.
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Take your son and leave. Go to a women’s shelter and they will help you get on your feet. Call a relative or an old friend and ask for help. Something. Just get out and get out soon. Don’t allow yourself to be a prisoner
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Get out. You are being stuck on your own. Get out, it’s not your problem.
OMG Really Girl??? get the hell outa there asap go to DCS n get them to help you for $ n Housing
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First of all if you were able to leave why the fudge wouldn’t your child be going with you!? Stop letting them use you. Don’t clean up after anyone but yourself and your child. Don’t cook for anyone but you and your child, don’t take care of the chickens they aren’t yours
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Take your son and leave. Go to a shelter, get the help you need and find a job! Get back up on YOUR own two feet. You don’t need to live the way that you are…no woman should!
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The key is at the very beginning of the paragraph when you said that y’all sleep in separate rooms and you’re not pleasing him
Google resources around you that might be able to help. Call 211 too and see if they have anything. Here are some things you can do to help you get on your feet. Apply for government housing in your area. Rent is based on income. No income no bill and they should be able to pay for your electric/gas for a certain amount. Apply for food stamps to help with food. Go after him for child support. Also look into stay at home jobs. If you have a car do stuff like Instacart or Uber eats. Some companies will give you a computer as well. Also look into families first as well if a stay at home job is not for you. They help with daycare expenses. So you could work while he is in daycare and it lasts like 5 years if I recall. It will be rough the first year but if you are the only one taking care of your child then it will be no different on your own vs him there. Basically he is just a person living there in case you want to talk to another adult. If you feel embarrassed or ashamed about seeking help, don’t. Everyone asks for help now and then. Maybe your parents will let you move back in while you find a new place too. Also the whole he won’t let me work screw that. He isn’t your master, you can work and parent. I am a single mom of 4 boys with no help. It’s doable. He just doesn’t want you to work so you have to rely on him and you won’t leave him. He isn’t gonna change and in fact it may get worse. He may get physical and hurt you. Leave asap.
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Your kids are going to suffer because you didn’t have intimacy with your husband in front of them
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How are you being used? Your lucky he’s still paying the rent and letting you live there … why haven’t you gotten a job first of all so u can stop depending on him he has no need to pay for your stuff anymore since u guys are not together anymore … get independent and stop whining why u haven’t gone out in 3 years it’s your life you are where you want to be .
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This sounds toxic. I’m sorry you feel trapped. Please find resources to get income and move out soon
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You need to go to a shelter, they will give you the help and support to become independent
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Put on your big girl panties and get a job worst case make him evict you and that takes money and over 30 days
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If hes 4, he should be able to go to vpk. I would look into that first and move on from there
Divorce the bastard and get alimony and he can pay child support! Then he will see what he has not been paying for!
Call child & youth family services; explain your situation and the mental abuse & they will help you get a place on your own.
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Then he can pay a sitter and you can get a part time job make ur own money 
f he bitches split sitter fee and don’t clean or cook for him just u and your kids
Get yourself some government help for god sakes people on here are so cold leave him
It’s not up to him if you can work or not. Remember you’re your own person and he doesn’t get a say. He’s controlling and clearly wants to control every aspect of your life. However remember you guys aren’t together so he can’t dictate what you do!
Your kids growing up to this, they will think it’s normal to treat and or be treated this way in future relationships, I don’t think you’d want your kid ever being in this situation therefore you should never let yourself either!
There’s so many options that you can take to get out of the situation you’re in! You just gotta do the leg work. Nothing he can do or say about it.
If you are broken up why does he have any say on you getting a job …there are plenty of places you can go , grocery stores ,fast food joints ECT any place is better than no place .start there to build your confidence and start getting some pocket money and please stop letting them take advantage of you
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Oh honey… look this is straight up abuse… he “provides” yet you have to use toilet paper for your period?! Girl I need your address I’ll send you hygiene products. That’s absolutely bonkers.
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Why would you go without your son is my question? If you are leaving, take your child with you. You need to get some information and help to to leave from a group that helps with abused women. You are being abused. Do not tell him about it. Then one day when he is gone, go.
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Leave and take your baby to a refuge until you can get some assistance. What a dick he is!
Go to a police station and say you need somewhere safe to stay/your son, and they can get you numbers to call to get help
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He won’t “let you” work? Why is it his decision? Take the power away from him and do what you want. F him. Find a way out.
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File for child support too
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Time to leave or get a contract where he pays you to cook, clean, do laundry and nanny his son
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Know your worth and get out
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Find away to leave! Ask for help from family. This is not a co-parenting relationship. You need to dig deep inside yourself for strength and courage. You can change ur situation but it’s going to be hard. You have expect that but u can’t give up on yourself. Do it for and for ur kids. You got this mama
You might have separate rooms etc but I bet my last dollar you jump beds.
No way is this a desperate couple.
If so why doesn’t he share in ALL expenses?
Does he pay CS,does the SIL pay you board and lodgings?
Even though in the same household he should be having the child on split days or weekend.
If you are separate I suggest doing up a care of the child roster and chores etc,bills etc.
Whose on the lease?
You shouldn’t be cooking or washing his clothes etc either if separated
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Let you work? Your separated. Leave, go see a lawyer & get spousal & child support.
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Girl stand up for yourself! Take your life back he doesn’t own you!
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Have u looked for some ‘work from home’ type positions? Remote work has become huge and a lot of places are hiring. Even if u only do it part time, it will give you some money that will allow u to get some of the things you need for yourself. Beyond that there is always public assistance available. I know it’s not typically a road most people want to take but if you are truly miserable and need out… it may be the route to take
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What do u mean he won’t let you? You have convinced yourself that you can’t do these things when you absolutely can. U have also convinced yourself that you can’t do it without leaving your son behind? That’s not an option…but do u know what is? Getting on your phone and researching your options for help to get back on your feet. The only thing stopping you is YOU
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He won’t let you work? You mean he refuses to take care of his child, right?
And when he isn’t laid off and working he’ll say you can’t work because no one will be home to care for the child.
I would start working on getting assistance as a single mother for food and shelter assistance so you can leave as soon as you can.
Then you’ll be in a better situation.
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Where r u I can let u move in with me I m 76 live in texad
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You gotta love yourself first and it’s time to get out. Please reach out to a local organization that helps women and children in your area. Do not tell him anything. You and your child deserve better and you already know it!! There are good ppl in this world willing to help. Hugs Mama!! You got this!! 
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Sounds more like y’all are married but without being intimate.
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You have only one child that’s 4 years old and you don’t work because his dad who you’re not intimate with ‘doesn’t let you’???
Get out
Apply for a job
Stand up for yourself and START WORKING!!!
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You have to stand up for yourself " ask for house keeping money or just let him do all the cleaning & cooking stop doing everything " take your son & go out meet people ’ and please get legal advice "
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Please contact a domestic violence support agency so you can get out. It will be rough at first but you need to leave.
He’s financially abusing you, emotionally abusing you and controlling to say the least.
I can’t believe he won’t even buy you basic hygiene products.
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Make a list of what it would cost if he had to pay someone to do what you do. Childcare, housework, laundry, cooking, etc. You are working, just not getting paid, and paying a ridiculous amount for rent.
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Seek government assistance… ask them what steps you should take he is certainly using you
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This sounds phony to me. If this woman is so stupid or has so little respect for herself as to stay under the circumstances she claims, she deserves what she gets. There are hundreds of organizations out there that she can seek help from, I don’t care what country she lives in.
Does anyone really believe a four year old has enough knowledge to tell if momma is contributing or not?
If this is true, and not just a cry for likes, I feel sorry for her in more ways than one, but it still would take a real effort on her part to change anything, which, other than writing about it doesn’t seem like she has any notion of doing.
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He won’t LET you work… find local resources and get yourself and your son gone. That’s no way to live
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Sounds like he’s extremely mentally abused you. I hope you have a friend you can talk to. Apply for any assistance you can get and file for custody asap! You need to take steps to build yourself back up again. You need to get your independence back.
So you’re great friends hey? Friends don’t let friends go without basic needs.
I stopped reading when I got to him not buying you sanitary items
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Sooo your actually in a relationship with out the title or benefits of a so called relationship… with controlling behaviour.
You need to look at who’s out there and who can help you get out you’ll find your so much happier once you leave
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Go get help from social services. Food stamps, housing assistance, and then look for a job that will allow you to not need these benefits once you are self sufficient. The longer you are out of the work force the harder it will be to get a decent job. You may even qualify for some sort of tuition assistance. Be an example for your child!!
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Apply for assistance and file for court.
This can’t be real and if it is then dang!
What state do you live in?
Uh…why don’t you simply be a single Mom and make a living, get child support, and have your life back like the rest of us. There’d be none of THAT to be unhappy about.
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Leave, put baby in child care and get a job
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Sounds like you got rid of a partner and adopted a child? Lol
Time to get a life and get out of the trap!!! The guy is a tool, you are better than that 
When your child starts school find a job you will enjoy regardless of what the child’s father says. Then either you find your own place or take over the lease on your own and show Him the door!!
I could not live with a Man that failed to contribute and as tough as it is on a single income I will never miss the arguments and control over my well being. Don’t be Afraid of becoming independent.
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LMAO he’s not your boo, buy your own 
. Better yet, get your own job and place and leave that man alone
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Why can’t you apply for a job???
Leave. Get out and go. Go to someone else, a parent, a sibling, a friend, because this man is treating you like dirt and you do not deserve that.
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He can’t exactly stop you from working while he’s laid off… like you said, you guys are no longer together, which means he no longer has the right to control you like that. Don’t ask him. TELL him you’re going to go get a job.
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He won’t let you work. What a crock. Just get yourself up, get cleaned up, and find the job of your dreams–and apply for it. Do you even have a resume ready to find a job? If not, get busy. Then, go out and get a job!!! Your only son is now 4 (kindergarten age) and you’ll be able to find a place for you and him. Amen.
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You gotta make a plan to get goin. Your kid will be happy that you’re happy, he wont miss the luxury stuff for a while while you rebuild a new life if that’s what you’re worried about, he just needs a happy parent to start
Many of my friends have done this and started fresh with not very much but they were sorted in no time and HAPPY living on their own terms.there is help out there.take the steps muma
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Find another place to stay, move in with relative or a friend until you get back on your feet. Get on social assistance until you can find a job you can do it there are programs out there should you look, best of luck
You poor girl. Take some advice from here and get yourself a life. We only have one life, don’t waste it existing like this.
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I highly suggest reaching out for assistance with daycare, housing, etc. Maybe a family member in the meant time to live eith. Get some state assistance and a job (even if part time for a bit) might be able to get free preschool for your son so you don’t have to worry about anyone watching him . And get out. It sounds extremely unhealthy for you and you deserve a life and to be happy. You can do it!!!
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I would see about moving in with my parents or maybe a close friend of yours. Get the ex on child support and start your life over. I wouldn’t stick around any longer since you feel the way you do. I pray that you find the healing you are seeking. You don’t deserve to be treated like that and you shouldn’t have to put up with it.
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Tell him to kiss your /&$ . Pack your crap and your sons and go somewhere !! Anywhere is better than there period . Get you a job talk to government assistance !! You can do this just do it .
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OmG there are women shelters that help you get started. If you were home for even two days in they would have to do something. They will need to see how hard you work. But if you keep getting walked on you will lose your spirit. Find a church or someone you can confide in.
I’m sorry but this is disgraceful and 100% controlling!
The first mistake you made was saying “we’re not in a relationship, we just live together” … no honey, you’re definitely in a relationship and it’s a controlling one, just because you’re not sleeping together doesn’t mean it’s not a relationship. Sounds like he just wants to keep you around because you’re a good mum and housewife, but be allowed to say his “single” and still sleep with other girls.
Move out, immediately, he is controlling you.
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First: he doesn’t own you! Second: would you want your son to do the same to his girl? Stop letting him control you, I am not saying it is going to be easy but you can get help and get away from him. You son is the only thing that should matter to you and if your not healthy and happy it will become his problem as well.
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He’s not your life partner go get a job, get a job at a daycare so you can take your kid with you to work. He doesn’t own you he can’t tell you that you can’t work, you’re a single mother you qualify for aid from the state, take it and leave that man’s house, because you’re right he’s using you and blaming you for his problems.
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First of all that’s abuse and you absolutely we’d to make leaving without your son your first priority! Start talking to your local services to see if they have any hotlines or suggestions on places to help you even a womens shelter if it’s bad enough
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What is wrong with this picture???
Sound alike you’re still in a relationship just not sexual. He reaps the benefits of having a girlfriend without the strings of a emotional connection/ relationship. You wait on him hand an foot like you’re together when you’re not. I could understand cooking one meal and doing some housework but you’re not together. You shouldn’t be doing his laundry and you shouldn’t be cleaning up after him or at least not without him asking if you would do so but shouldn’t be expected of you at all. As for you not being given sanitary supplies that’s absolute abuse of power. You’re essentially his maid/slave free help who does whatever he says without question. You’re being abused an used all in one. Get your ass up put on your big girl pants find a friend or family member you can trust with your son or put him preschool and get yourself a job. He won’t let you have a job NO YOU WONT let YOU have a Job. No one tells you that you can’t or shouldn’t do something but your own self! Grow up an get your son an you out of the toxic living situation you are in.
Move out then ya dozy boot