I am a bonus mom. I was introduced to the kids without BM permission. I love those kids. So long as your ex isn’t introducing the kids to tons of different women and it is someone he is serious with there is no problem imo. I do get being the mom, feeling threatened … but a good bonus mom is there to augment a kids life … not remove the BM.
They are his children too. He doesn’t require your permission for anything he does.
He shouldn’t need your permission he’s your ex and they are his children too it would of been nice if he had told you before hand
He does not have to ask you permission to do anything besides leave the state with the kids unless it’s in the parenting order that he asked to ask you permission but you just don’t do that when it comes to parenting orders.
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I would be too, I don’t know who she is or how she is. My kids meeting The GIRLS my ex dated previously to me is the worst thought ever because he still talks to those things.
Whatever he does in his time is his business as long as they’re safe it’s not your business unless it’s like co parenting purposes is how I see it now… At first I was mad but as long as my baby’s safe which ik she is with her dad I don’t care 
Those kids are literally HALF of you and HALF of their dad, you have no right getting pissed off or telling him what to do when it comes to what he does in his time that he has his kids 
Has every right. They’re just as much his kids as yours. She obviously likes him enough and is interested and to want to meet his kids.
If he is in a relationship with her and not just "talking"to her, then there is no reason the kids can’t meet her. Yes, it would have been nice to give you a heads up. But he does not have to.
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If it was agreed upon, then yes, you have a right to be upset. If you are upset because of an unexpressed or never agreed on expectation, then no.
You can’t stop it! They are both yours and his children, so therefore the rules apply to you both. Hopefully, you two can co-parent and work out rules or some sort of guidance that you both can follow to have peace within the family. The kids are the most important issue here.
I dont think its your decision. Its his. Unless there’s something bad/dangerous about her that your kid shouldn’t be introduced to.
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His kids. His time. His judgement. Like it or not you don’t have a say in who he brings around them on his time, unless you have proof they are a danger to your children. And any lawyer/judge will tell you that.
Do you want him prying in on your life and dictating who and when you can bring around your kids? I understand being upset, especially if the break up is still fresh but its something you don’t have a say in.
So important for parents to meet new person in their kids lives but not all think this way. Leave him off kill them with kindness. He obviously wont wish to meet any person you will introduce to the kids so shows more about his parenting than yours pick your battles dont even sweat it just make sure you have conversations with the kids to ensure everything is appropiate and that you have a conversation with him and the gf about boundaries etc
As he is the other parent you can’t control the things he does with his life according to relationships.
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We have an understanding, if it’s serious like real serious than you can but if you’re unsure about them than they don’t need to meet the kids!!
I don’t think he needs your permission… they’re his kids as well, sorry momma…
If they work out she will be a part of their life. I think you should have been able to meet her first however but I don’t see an issue with it other than that.
Are you going to ask HIS permission when you introduce your kids to your new mate? Grow up. Get over yourself.
I’m sure he’s capable of making that decision on his own, will he need your permission for engagement or moving in with someone…even having more children?.
Do you ask his permission before you and your kids do everything?!?!?!
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Unfortunately we don’t get those choices on either side
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Unless you had an agreement, you can’t control his actions (been there.) It would have been the courteous respectful thing to do… I’m guessing there is a reason he is an ex. Make sure to talk to the kids to see how they are feeling. Do not make them feel bad about meeting her, or even liking her
Well honestly…
This is going to be an unpopular opinion probably. But this is the kind of thing you can get all caught up in a power struggle about. But what is going to be the difference if you know ahead of time? Eventually they will meet her anyway.
Don’t let your co parenting turn toxic over control issues.
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I would call it disrespectful as you should be the first to meet her and say if and when it’s ok for the children especially if the new gf is serious about it because if there just in it for a fling that’s not good for the children is my thoughts anyways… just because you don’t get to give him permission about who he’s with it doesn’t mean you don’t get permission on who comes in and out of your children’s life…
It’s none of your business if they’re getting serious enough where he feels the need to introduce him then that’s his decision not yours.
I think there’s worse things to get pissed about. This kind of stuff is petty in my opinion.
I do think you should’ve been informed but what’s done is done. Let him know you would’ve preferred to have it discussed and let it go… the anger won’t serve you here.
Unfortunately you gotta trust your ex. He is also the kids parent and would not see any harm come to them. You have to trust his judgement. If the same keeps happening e.g. multiple women then have a conversation with your ex because that’s not ok.
My ex and I have the agreement that nobody meets our children until it’s serious and there’s a future there.
Personally, I’d like to meet who is around my kids.
I would be upset if he broke our agreement but I make sure to talk about these things in advance.
If he is your x has to do with kids not u nobe of your concern unless it interfere with children’s life
They are his kids also but if he was anyway decent he would of give you the heads up
How long have they been together?
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cant tell him what to do on HIS time. those are his kids as well. you cant control it all
To be fair its nothing to do with you what he does you cant stop him and there’s no point being pissed coz its already happened you can’t control what he does
I would ask myself what is so triggering to me about it? It obviously hit a nerve
I’m with my babies father so I’m not sure i can weigh in here…I do have an opinion tho
I don’t get why parents need permission off their ex’s to do things 
I bet he’d have plenty to say if you did it. It should have been discussed before it happened.
My ex got with a girl 17 years younger than him, got her pregnant and brought a house with her. My daughter met her pretty quickly, but its worked out ok and she looks after my daughter. Its not your judgement to trust unfortunately
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How old are the kids and how long they been together…?
Do you ask his permission when it comes you introducing them to other people ?
I mean sure it’s not ideal, was there a previous communication that when the time came yall would communicate prior??? Otherwise sucks to suck
Why does he need your permission?
Would u have him meet ur new boyfriend first before the kids did?
Nothing you can do about. You can be mad or you can just accept it and move on.
It’s his choice, not yours. You don’t get to micro manage his life anymore. 
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Why would you choose?
Out of ur control but u can control on ur side with kindness and making sure there loved kids are smart
All these comments stating the ex doesn’t need permission are true but very judgemental. Maybe the person just wanted the courtesy of knowing in advance.
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Depends. In my situation my ex was not a dependable or responsible person. He was not trustworthy and did drugs and committed crimes all the time. I blew up when i saw his girlfriend of 1 month post photos of my child on Facebook and they all called me crazy. In my eyes, i dont know her but i do know his judgment and lack ther of so i wanted groundrules.
- Be with her at least 6 months so you actually get to know the person around your kid
- I need to meet the person around my kid.
Relax, it’s jealousy reading its ugly head, keep things civil for the kids
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Out of respect he should have at least given you a heads up beforehand and given you a chance to meet her first so you know the person that will potentially be helping your ex raise your babies, I wouldn’t want my husband bringing just anybody around our kids before I met her so I could know who my babies would be around. If he can let me meet her it would show me it’s serious and not just a fling
My ex his baby mother when we first started dating the daughter went and told her and she called him really quick talking about I need to meet her and blah blah blah felt the same type of way but she already had a boyfriend the daughter was sleeping in the same bed as them but she also has another daughter from a previous dude and she would sleep in the room with the guys kids but had the audacity to say something like this and my ex didn’t meet that guy her excuse was the baby mama’s boyfriend didn’t want to meet the baby daddy and after we broke up recently after almost 3 years together the daughter goes and tells my ex’s sister which is her aunt that her mom has already been with like two different men since she broke up with her dude what a coincidence that we all broke up almost around the same time and my ex sister added her on Facebook but I got blocked after moving in with this man after his Mom moved out I had my own place but he was staying with his mom anyways to cut the story short let’s not act like baby mothers don’t have boyfriends already and never allow the fathers to have notice. 
Well that may be their stepmom someday…
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You should have definitely met her before them I feel like
Unlesss you discussed it prior what’s the big deal?
My ex moved himself and my kids in with his 19 year-old, married-to-someone-else girlfriend without asking me either 
but yes I’m pissed
Idk, my bf introduced me to his son right away. We met when we had our kids with us. So my kids met him the first day we met too.
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It’s none of your business. 
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Unfortunately you don’t have a say in that
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Why would he need your permission? They are his children and he has rights. Have you introduced him to any male friends without his permission?
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They are his children too
Not a big deal. They are his kids too.
I am sorry, but sounds like none of you on here know anything of respect. It does not matter if it was done during his visitation, out of respect for the whole situation you speak to the other parent before any of this is done. You introduce the gf first to the other parent before any of this is done as well. I was pissed in this situation before and she acted like it was no big deal. Once she became a mother she apologized to me for all she said and how she acted. My daughter’s now step mom took it upon herself to meet me before she met my daughter and I absolutely loved that she did. My ex and I had a talk about it before as well so we could both prepare her. We all need to know how someone else is and will be around our children before they are introduced to gf or bf. I am thinking this is more of what upset her that she was blindsided and does not know this woman.
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Ya don’t need permission…but I know how you feel
Not your business. He is an ex, right
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His kids, his choice 
Get over yourself
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They’re going to introduce them to many. If child’s not being hurt who cares. You don’t get his permission do you?
Should not need Permission.dont teach hate to kids just because you mad at them.
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None of your business!
And you sound jealous
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If you’re coparenting without an order in place and you have established rules that are being broken, time to go the court route.
Can’t control everything.
Why do they need permission? Your not together and hes moving on with his life. As long as she isn’t a bitch and treats the kids right there will be no problem. I would not be mad if my kids dad introduced my son to his new girlfriend. It’s not my right anymore nor is it yours. You will move on also but will you ask his permission?
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As a mother myself, the advice I’m going to give you is get over it, you sound jealous, my ex husband and I have been sharing custody for 8 years, if he wants to introduce the kids to his new girlfriend it’s fine, just like he is fine with me introducing my kids to my boyfriend. The only time we say anything about it is when the kids say something bad is happening, so far I have had one issue with one of his gf’s and they are no longer in their lives. If your ex wants to introduce his kids to his new gf let him and mind your own business. Parents like you make me so mad because of how selfish you sound. Sorry if you don’t like the bluntness but I’m sick of mother’s trying to throw their baby daddy’s under the bus because they have someone new in their life. Your an adult act like it.
Gonna be the black sheep here. I see alot of he or she doesn’t need permission stuff going on here and I’m sure most havent been in a situation where the other parent has gotten mad enough to take you to court over an issue like this it does happen tho and I know 2 people that has gotten in trouble and it states in their court papers now that they must discuss bringing new people in their kids lives first. 1 of those people was actually ruled that he couldnt have his gf around his kid. So dont be so quick to jump the gun and jump down her throat saying oh they dont need to talk about it cause in a healthy co parenting situation that is something they do need to discuss if there is other issues going on. Nobody knows if this is serious or if the dude jumps from 1 to the other. I know dudes that jump from one girl to the next I know girls who do the same it is not healthy for children to be in that mess. I also know parents that had a gf/bf hurt their kids before. If a parent really wanted to push the issue they can have it put in their court docs by a judge . I think her whole problem here is shes mad he didnt give her enough respect to talk to her first about it not so much a jealousy issue like some of you are saying. If hes been dating her for awhile then yes a discussion should have happened and because they are also her children as well and she does have a right to protect them just as much as he does it’s a 2 way street there. If it was a situation where he was just jumping from gf to gf then no kids should not be introduced so that there is no attachment issues that’s how I feel it should be it’s just a respect thing when it comes to coparenting .
He’s their dad. He doesn’t have to run those kinds of things by you.
He doesn’t need to ask your permission.
Out with the old and in with the new war 
He doesn’t need your permission. Legally. Sorry.
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Ugh he doesn’t need your permission sorry
Depends. Need more info
Someone sounds jealous
I understand how she feels and I was not happy when my ex started bringing his gf around but honestly it didn’t matter what girl it was, I wouldn’t have been happy regardless. Fast forward 10 years or so, her and I are friends believe it or not lol. She ended up having a daughter with him and he bailed on both of us and all the kids. I know now that she was the one that took care of my babies, now teenagers, and loved them like her own. When my kids were sick while visiting them, she is the one that called me… my kids love her and her family and I have no problem with that at all. We have even gone to where they live and spent weekends out there. Good luck!
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As a veteran single mom who has been divorced over 10 years I have this advice: remove yourself and your personal feelings from the matter. It isn’t about u and him anymore.
Having someone else love your babies is amazing. And honestly the more love the better.
Your ex doesn’t owe you an explanation during his time.
THAT SAID. The above only applies if they are safe. If your ex is a good parent and drug/ substance free.
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As a single mom for 11 years now. The beginning was hard. I’m the one that wanted out bc he was an abusive idiot…but I digress. He introduced my daughters to a nut job who is now in the crazy house.
My daughter’s both told me stories (in recent years) I never want to even think of. 
but I also didn’t introduce him to who I was dating.
I’d say he really doesn’t NEED your permission. If you went thru the courts I’m sure this is what they would say as I have been there done that.
Of course most of the time it depends on the judge you get.
Good luck
Kinda need more context. How long have they been together? Have you met her? Personally I would be upset if it’s woman after woman being introduced. As a mother I feel like you should be introduced as well, you have a right to know who is around your kids.
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She may have worded this wrong. Im the type of mom that wants to know who is in my kids life. So i would be upset it wasnt brought to my attention cause i would bring it to his attention.
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I understand the hurt feelings, but he is allowed to live his life. They are his children too. Even if you would give him a heads up first, you can’t expect people to act the same way as you. I doubt it was done with evil intentions.
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Doesn’t need you permission tbh how ever I would understand you being annoyed if he introduced them when him and the new gf have just gotten together. I didnt introduce my eldest to my now fiancee till a year later, even then my ex started on me for it vecause I didnt ask permission for a child I had custody of to meet my partner after a year of knowing him
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As a single mom for 11 years, you don’t get a say so in who your ex introduces to your kiddo when they are in you ex’s care. Don’t get pulled in to what is occurring at his house, just focus on yours. I know this is extremely difficult as I had to learn to do this, but it will make you less frustrated in the long run. Good luck!
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If they’re introducing my smalls to someone new I ask that it be a serious relationship because my daughter has grown attached before and now is getting women’s names confused. I ask that it be serious ( they have been together for a little while ) and that I know where, when, and that he not leave her alone with the new woman. And at some point soon I’d also like to meet the woman who’s going to be around my child
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He doesn’t need your permission. Just like you don’t need his permission. I had an ex who demanded he be informed of everyone I was dating. I informed him when the divorce paper was signed he no longer had access to my private life.
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I wouldn’t say he needed your permission, since you don’t control what happens with them during his time, but I would say he should have the common decency to let you know it’s happening. You’re both in charge of making sure you know who is around them and influencing them at all times. Effective communication saves so much time and can prevent so many hurt feelings
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If he is in a relationship with someone and there together maybe even thinking about living together, it’s really not a big deal. I’d understand like if it’s a new girl every week or she’s like a druggie or something. But in honesty when he has his kids he don’t need your permission. If she’s not harming them or anything there’s no need to be upset. When you have your kids you introduce them to who you want so it’s the same for him. Don’t waste ur time getting mad and making yourself look insecure
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They are just as much his kids as they are yours. It may not be ideal, but you can’t control what he does with his parenting time any more than he can control what you do with yours. As long as the kids are not in danger and he’s a fit capable parent, leave him alone. I’m sure you don’t ask his permission before you introduce them to new people.
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My ex does this with every girl he meets and I get pissed too… I don’t want people coming in and out of our son’s life but he doesn’t see. To care especially since these girls don’t stick around anyway… my kid gets attached and then they are gone… I feel like there’s no reason to introduce them to him unless it’s serious
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All you can do is hope he chose wisely. Also that your kid likes them because they are a good role model that happens to be an extra in their life.
He doesn’t need your permission just like you dont need his. You can ASK if he wouldn’t mind holding off until he was feeling like she was going to be around a while but ultimately its up to him.
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