Communication people! She can NOT read your mind. Plus, itâs your child. Itâs not her responsibility to take care of your kids. She most likely thinks youâve got everything handled.
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I donât understand what sheâs pissed about⌠like she never asked the neighbor to do the things sheâs mad about in the first place. So sheâs mad the her neighbor canât read her mind and tell that she wants help? Also it isnât her job to ferry someone elseâs kids around⌠and what about asking the father for help? Whereâs he at?
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You sound like you feel extremely entitled to her time. Maybe itâs you thatâs the bad friend.
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What kind of friend are you? Expecting your friend to be a built in babysitter just because you live close??!!! Hell no!! Iâd cut you off sooo damn quick 
pfffttt 
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Have you offered to help with her kids? LOL. I watch my best friends two girls so she can go to the gym because sheâs a single working mom and Iâm on ei right now because Iâm pregnant and have a toddler and she offers to take my son to five me a break also. Itâs give and take, as most relationships arenât just one sided⌠itâs nice of a friend to offer but it shouldnât just be assumed⌠I wouldnât just want to assume sheâd take my kid whenever I needed her to just because we live close as she wouldnât assume Iâd watch her kids 7 days a week just because I stay at home⌠
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Well if your paying a sitter why donât you offer your friend the same. She has her own kids to worry about and itâs a huge hassle getting them ready in the morning. Sitters are not free. Reach out to her with a compensation offer.
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She is a SAHM who probably has her hands full already.
Do you ever offer to take HER kids somewhere? So she can have a few hours to herself? Iâm willing to bet money the answer is no.
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I donât mean to be a dick. But who popped YOUR kids out, you or her ? I learned a long time ago that NO ONE is ever obligated to do anything for you unless you under 18 years of age and talking about your parents⌠I used to think like that, but Iâve came to realize that no one offers is because they think I have it handled or they have their own crap to deal with
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Dude you are 100 percent over reacting and they are your kids not hersâŚShe already has to get her own kids up and ready on timeâŚYOU SEEM SO ENTITLED ITS SICKENINGâŚ
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Wow, as a stay at home mom, all I gotta sayâŚis fuck you dude. You said sheâs always willing if you need it, if you would like that set up then be an adult and ask her yourself but she owes you nothing just because she doesnât work herself.
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This is just for attention right 
raise your own damn kids they arenât her responsibility.
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Those are YOUR kids. You cant EXPECT someone to help you with them. Family, friends, or not. Wow.
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Is this an April foolâs thing?? Because just wowâŚif this is true!! How dare you expect help!!!Those are your kids no one elseâs responsibility.
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Is this a joke? You sound ignorant. Lmao
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I stayed for all the comments 
I love when yâall keep shit real here.
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You have to be joking. This is an April fools post right? If this is real I feel so bad for your friend. She helps when you ask, and here you are mad that she doesnât assume you want help when you havenât asked for it? This mentality is so entitled and toxic.
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Maybe youâre kid is an asshole at her house and she doesnât want to deal with him.
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Iâm not trying to be rude at all when I say this, but I feel that you and your husband are overreacting big time. You should never expect for someone else to give their time to care for your child, thatâs your job as their parent. Imagine if this friend came to you and said she was so offended that you hadnât offered to give her money for her childâs expenses because you had a job and she didnât. You would definitely be offended if she said this to you and youâre expecting something very similar from her. Her time is also valuable and she has her own family to think about and care for.
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Really? If this was the reddit am i the asshole thread?..you would be at the top of it for your assumptions of your friend.
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Why is it her responsibility? Why havenât you asked her or offered to pay her? You are responsible for your children and she is responsible for hers. Being a stay at home mother doesnât mean she is doing nothing all day
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Is this even real lol
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Literally just askâŚ
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I wouldnât want someone elseâs kid in my house for 45 minutes five days a week, especially in the morning when everyoneâs hustling to get out the door. Even if I love that kid to death, itâs another body to deal with.
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This is EXACTLY why I stopped trying to make âfriendsâ they alwayssss EXPECTED me to watch their kids whenever they needed just cuz Iâm a stay at home mom so now Iâm afraid to make friends cuz I feel thatâs the only reason they even want to be my friend ( for a FREE babysitter) dnt get me wrong I love kids and have noooo problem with all the kids playing outside etc or watching them in a emergency etc but thatâs another thing they would always leave their kids with me and then when picking them up they would just come pick them up and leave right away not even make their kids help pick up toys etc I have 4 of my own and got sick of picking up after everyone elseâs kids as well 
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Wow. People sure have changed!! I had no issues with my BFFs kids coming over whenever. I use to take them just for the heck of it and there was TWO of them.
Clearly bitches ainât the same these days
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âŚwow. If you need help, just bloody ask. Something tells me she isnât a mind reader.
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It is not her responsibility.
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Maybe she is upset with you because you have never offered to pay her to get your kids on and off the bus, but you would pay a sitter. Maybe she has resentment against you tooâŚ
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Ask her! A friend of mine used to pay me to do this with her daughter. She came to me and asked, offered to buy breakfast and after school snacks for the girls and it worked out great.
Not her job to watch ur kid. Sorry.
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You sound a bit high maintenance, maybe she doesnât want to take on the responsibility. Or. Maybe she thinks you donât need help since you pay a sitter. Communicate.
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This is a joke right? Itâs not her kid
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Ouwwwww⌠Why would you even feel entitled to have your friend âcare for YOUR childlâ?Maybe she is overwhelmed with her own? This just hits me wrong.
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Wait. What makes you feel entitled to help?
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is this a series question??
Wow , im sorry but you canât just expect her to help with your kids, this sounds very entitled! If you need the help ask her, she shouldnât have to offer, a stay at home mom already has a lot on her plate! If you ask her for help you should offer to help her when youâre off! Ultimately though your kids arenât her responsibility!
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This right here is why I dont have any friends. They always expect me to watch their kids. Your kid is not my responsibility. Iâll help and watch out for them but you also have your friends spouse to think of. One extra kid can be stressful at times. You donât know her real home life regardless of how close you are.
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Hey Amber Rose Ward this feels familiar 
Like no, Iâm not your free babysitter.
Ummm entitled much, she isnât responsible for your kid. You are acting like a Karen and expecting her to wait on you hand and foot, get over yourself princess. 
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Entitled much? Why tf would she watch your kid? Also, just because sheâs a SAHM doesnât mean she doesnât have her hands full. You really need to get over yourself.
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Maybe you should offer to pay her.
Omg! The bloody cheek of you. Shameful.
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I make it clear Iâll deal with my own kids I donât like to deal with other peopleâs kids. Sounds odd I dont like most kids. If you choose to have my child at your house and have them tag along with things at times cool. However 99 percent of the time I will not have the kids friends over I do not allow tag along. I simply wonât I mean if your child happens to maybe bike over to my area Iâll give snacks but yea ummm after an hour two max little kid I think I hear your parents calling.
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Maybe ask her if sheâd like to make a little extra money in the morning
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If your that bothered by it ask her to watch your child. Maybe she doesnt want to and she shouldnât feel obligated just cuz she is a friend or a stay at home mom. I have friends who have kids around my girls age and I wouldnt watch them cuz they are brats and I dont want that around my girls.
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Surely this is an April fools joke, right??? 
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Why is she obligated to do your job as his mom just because sheâs home with hers? Sheâs not your employee, youâre entitled and selfish. I wouldnât do shit for you.
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Is this real?? I canât wrap my head around this 
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Well. Offer to pay her instead of a sitter. Simple solution 
I wouldnât offer because itâs not something Iâd want to do every day. But if someone were to ask me for a favor on occasion, I would do it. Stop being a princess and ask her, with pay because itâs the right thing to do. Or just deal with it
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If this is serious, you are overreacting . Itâs not her responsibility to take care of your child/ren at any given time. Theyâre yours- itâs your responsibility to see that your child or children get to and from school, have a sitter, etc.
Some people donât like other peoples kids for whatever reason lol. I have kinda turned into this person 
. Before I had kids, I worked in childcare. I worked weekends to babysit, etc. so Iâve ALWAYS loved kids. Once I had my own, I have had no desire to take care of other peoples kids, and Iâm definitely not doing it free lol.
There are soooo many scenarios that can be the problem⌠another one- offer once, and they wonât leave you alone and take advantage of the situationâŚ
have you offered pay?
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Umm yes youâre overreacting and acting entitled as hell. Its not your friends responsibility to put your kids on the bus PERIOD. You need a reality check girl because I wouldnât want to be your friend. This is about the pettiest thing Iâve ever read.
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Why donât you offer to pay her? Why pay someone else? Have you ever thought she might feel the same way?
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Wowsa, mom guilt can be a b*tch but donât project it on your friend, thatâs not fair. You chose to work outside the home and sheâs able to be a stay at home mom, stay in your respective lane and stop being a judge Judy. Have an honest conversation with yourself about your feelings, and then ask for help, which you obviously need.
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Maybe she canât get past the smell. You reek of entitlement. If your husband is also bothered by it tell him to change his schedule.
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Grow up. Her world canât revolve around you. Just because she isnât working out of her home doesnât mean she isnât busy with her own life. Quit being selfish, why arenât you helping her? Annoying whiner.
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In my opinion⌠She is no friend, if you are really as tight as you explained, infect not everyone can be called a friendâŚ
I have a friend of almost 20 years of friendship between us. She is older then me but that makes no difference, Her kids is mine and visa versa. Her twins is 10 years old and calls me their elderst sister which they donât have. I have a 6month old baby which they call their little brother, yes I know lol but will correct them on another day.
I am the stay at home mom and sheâs the working momâŚ
Things happens automatically without asking, if we ever ask then itâs basically a reminder.
I know I am responsible to drive the kids to school and see to it that their home is done, some nights when she works late I have to get them settled, eat, wash and go to bed Inorder to be fresh for school the next day.
On her off days she automatically takes care of my son, literally, just so I can take a break and gain my strength again.
But because of our beautiful communication levels, we automatically fall in and know how to assist when needed without feeling abused or entitled.
This is just our beautiful relationship because we choose to.
So maybe talk to your friend and hear her point of view because clearly you guys are not on the same page. You have expectations of her that she either donât know about or choose not to know about you will only know when you have spoken to her directly.
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Iâm a full time working out of the house mom. I have an hour travel one way to work and an hour travel back home.
If I need help I will always ask the stay at home mom next door, but I would NEVER expect her to just volunteer to watch or âhelpâ me with my kid because she is home! When I do ask for help I pay her so she knows Iâm not taking advantage of her or our friendship. I would have to pay for a babysitter anyways. I pay full time after child care till 5:30 because honestly no person who is a friend is 100 percent reliable to watch or help with the child you have⌠if I need the extra help from other moms I ask.
Have you offered her any help? Like taking her kids for 45 minutes in return of her helping you out to get your child on the bus?
She is your friend. Her kids are your kids friends. She doesnât âowe it to you to offerâ you any sort of help with your kids.
Figuring out child care, transportation, and odd and ends is between you and your husband, that is not your friends problem.
I donât know what your relationship is with your husband but with mine I donât trust him and canât depend on him to take our daughter to school because of his work schedule. If I know we are gonna have bad weather, I wonât have daycare or Iam in need of some help, I plan in advance with my work, even if itâs a day that I will be late and handle it myself or pay one of the other mothers to help me. If I have some sort of an emergency without child care I will call into work or take my kid with me and explain the situation in person to my boss.
I have done this a lot during covid shut downs.
She is your friend. Not your babysitter you feel entitled to.
Stay at home moms have no outlet. They are working 24/7 30 different jobs.
If you need that much help maybe take your kids to school yourself if they offer a breakfast program take them early, so no waiting for the bus, get an after school care provider, Or perhaps ask the grandparents or family or you and husband take turns on situations like this so neither one of you are consistently calling in to work.
You are the parents.
Donât confuse being friends with babysitter.
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I had to stop taking care of my familyâs children because I have 3 of my own and honestly donât need the added pressure and I was honest about it.
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Maybe she sees the red flags that itâs expected by you that she help - and it isnât. Do you offer to take the kids on the weekend so she gets a break?
Do you offer to go halves in the sitter with her so she can take mornings off?
Itâs seems awfully prejudiced of you lol
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Your friend has her own kids and own schedule she doesnât have to offer anything. Maybe find a job that is more flexible.
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Ummm have you ever offered to watch her kids so she can get a break? All I hear is me me me and I need etc. What about her? Do you think because you get dressed and head to a job that because sheâs at home sheâs not busy too? Iâve been a stay at home mom and believe me I detest babysitting other ppl kids! Yes detest! I love kids donât get me wrong but my days were so consumed with my family I couldnât bear to take care of anyone elseâs child! Stop being a whiny ninny and offer some help to her too! And maybe she will feel to do the same! Either way friend or not she is in no way obligated to take care of your child. You are very boldface to assume she should!
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I wouldnât want that responsibility of anotherâs kid everyday. I donât care how close. I might not feel good. I might be running late with my own kid. I might not want my friend to get to high of expectations of me. Just saying, why I would never offer.
Glad your not my mate 
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Pull your head out of your ass and see that nobody owes you a damn thing. No matter how easy it may be for her to âhelpâ you, itâs not convenient and she has her own kid to worry about. Get a fucking grip.
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Wow! I am speechless ( and that donât happen often )! How old are you? This is jr high/ high school level shit! Have you thought about asking her for help, offer to pay her for the help? She is not obligated to offer you anything friend or not. Grow up
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you need to get the hell over yourself. You are definitely overreacting. She doesnât have to offer to look after or hep with YOUR kid at all! Doesnât matter how close the kids are or how long youâve been friends. Honestly you should tell her so she can find other friends she doesnât need one like you hiding resentment for absolutely fuck all 
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You are very wrong, she doesnât have to offer anything to you, doesnât matter how close you guys are she has her own responsibilities, and you even said that when you asked her to help she said yes, how about you ask her if she could help you out and you pay her what you pay the babysitter, instead of making stuff up in your head talk to her and be honest and give her the opportunity to tell you why she would or wouldnât be able to help. She doesnât have to offer anything, itâs your child, your responsibility and no one elseâs.
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Have conversation with her and let her in on how you feel.
Just because you would do it doenst mean other would. And itâs your child not her responsibility.
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As a once stay at home mom I can honestly say WOW. Why would you be butthurt about your friend not taking care of the child YOU chose to have? Itâs your child and your responsibility not hers. She is in no way obligated to take care of your child and you need to stop acting so entitled to her help seeing as she has her own kids you just sound downright selfish and stupid.
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Why did this pop up in my feed? Do you know how many people offer to help with ALL 5 of my kids? 0. That is the number.
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Why donât you ask?maybe she also feel offended that you hired someone while sheâs there.
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Your kids your responsibility stop being so entitled and selfish
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When you make the decision to have kids they are your responsibility and yours alone. You donât expect help from others. You are being unreasonable. The same way sheâs doing for her kids without asking for help is the same way you do for yours. Itâs just ridiculous of you to expect her help.
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Are you serious?? She doesnt have to do anything for your child⌠i wouldnt expect my best friends to offer to look after my kid no matter how convenient it would be for me, id just ask. Be honest and ask her for help instead of crying about it like a lil bitch⌠Geeze!!
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So I have a friend who lives next door and we have babysat for each other several times but weâve always asked. You canât just feel entitled to that help. Your child, your responsibility. If you need or want the help, ask for it.
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Please tell me this is a joke
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Entitled is one word you could use⌠She doesnât owe you ANYTHING. PERIOD. Why should she offer when you pay someone? Maybe you offer to pay her for what the sitter does! You just donât want to pay anyone. And the worst part? You even said the sitter has to come back. So you are paying someone before and after school, but expect your friend to take that on free of charge? Come on. Iâm glad you are not my friend. I stay at home and trust me, some days are harder than others without worrying about an extra kid.
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Wow. Just wow. I honestly canât believe what Iâve just read.
I donât think Iâve seen a post so entitled in all my life.
The fact you expect her to offer says a lot about who you are as a person.
Youâre an adult. If you need help, ask.
Youâre harbouring all this resentment towards this poor girl and she has no idea why. Thatâs disgusting.
Just because sheâs a stay at home mum doesnât mean her time is any less important than yours, and it doesnât mean she should take your kids every day no matter how long for.
You and your husband both need to have a word with yourselves.
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Holy shit. I get being hurt, but this is silly. Youâre acting like she is obligated to look after your kid for you. You gonna pay her? Mention it to her that way. âI pay a sitter to look after my kid but youâre my friend and I trust you more. Maybe we could arrange something?â Otherwise, donât say a word and maybe do this woman a favour and stop being her friend. Sounds like youâre feeling entitled. Iâm a stay at home mom and I donât offer to look after my neighbourâs kids and thatâs only because I have enough on my plate, I donât need to add to that.
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Maybe sheâs just overwhelmed with her duties. Just because sheâs a SAHM doesnât mean everything comes easy for her.
You want her to share of what she seems to have plenty, try sharing of what you seem to have more. That would be money for working outside too?
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Offer her the JOB. Like why wouldnât you? She doesnât owe you anything, if sheâs your friend then ask yourself why youâre unwilling to value her time and honestly why should she offer to solve your problems? It just sounds shitty.
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Get over yourself both you and your husband. Take care of your child. Make the neccessary arrangements to make sure your child is safe and comfortable. No body owes you anything .excuse me??? She hasnt offered. Have you tried offering to pay her for looking after your child like you do the helper? You have no respect, you are self serving and selfish. Respect peoples time and peace of mind.
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Have you even asked her? just because sheâs a stay at home mom doesnât mean she has all the free time
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No wonder she hasnât ever offered! I wouldnât offer either considering your whole mindset!
Jesus girl, grow up.
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Dude, maybe she assumes you would ASK her like an adult if you needed it and not expect it to be offered. She ISNT a mind reader, she canât be expected to know what you want or are thinking and even if she did it is absurd for you to take her help as a standard expectation.
As an adult, you can ask her if you can give her a little extra money to pick up, keep, drop off your child with hers since you are neighbors and your kids are good friends and say it would really help you a lot if she could.
Donât be passive aggressive or act entitled. Go with humble sincerity and there shouldnât be a problem.
Also, she is allowed to say âNo.â.
Your kids rnt her responsibility, she has her own family to take care of and get ready for school- she doesnt need your kids as well- sounds like your friend takes care of her responsibilities doesnt sound like she expects someone else too. U sound like u think she owes u bc u work . U seem very rude, disrespectful, entitled and selfish - so does your husband. Just bc shes an at home mum- she doesnt have to be a babysitter for u. I hope she sees what u r really like.
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Uhhh itâs not your neighbors responsibility to look after your kid. Why donât you just fucking ask her instead of expecting a handout
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Iâm a SAHM to 6 kids, and I sure as shit donât go around offering my help to ppl with kids JUST bc they work outside the home
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It really sounds like you think you are entitled to her providing child care for your child. This level of entitlement is actually gross and super distasteful. Additionally it sounds like you think since sheâs a SAHM, she should do it all for you. Being a SAHM myself, it is hard as shit physically and mentally. I definitely donât suggest discrediting the work SAHMs do⌠thatâs really crappy honestly. We have just as much on our plate if not more than you do going to work.
You and your husband both need to sit down to figure out your entitlement issues you both seem to have. Never in a million years would I expect or feel itâs my friends job to provide child care for my child since they ride the same bus, go to the same school, are best friends, families go on vacations together, sheâs a SAHM, etc. that is just ignorant.
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Iâm not sure what your job is but imagine being a maid. All day for 40-50`hours a week you cleanâŚclean clean clean. Then add on about another 14 hours a week cleaning your own home. Now your friends gets upset because she works 10 more hours a week than you and you have never offered to clean her home. You dont even know bc sheâs never even asked either. If she had asked you may have had the time or you may have been able to explain how you have too many houses youre cleaning right now but since youâve never been asked its kind of presumptuous to just out of the blue say id do a job youâve never asked me to do but im not able to because of⌠if youâre a good stay at home mom your job NEVER ends. It is 24/7, 365 days a year, no holidays off, no sick days, no vacations. She canât quit or change fields if she gets burnt out. What you see as ONLY 45 minutes, you should see as what if your boss added more work on you and said you had to work 45 minutes more everyday.
Iâm not sure why you and your husband are so hurt about this or why you havenât put yourself in her shoes? I also donât know why neither of you have ever bothered to ask her to babysit. Did you pay her when she did it the other times bc if not that maybe a good reason why she never volunteered.
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I was gonna say something but I realized that it had been said 494 timesâŚ
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Dummy. She is not your friend
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Wow these comments!!! It takes a village people. These comments are everything thatâs wrong with the world these days. If I see another mama in a pinch, Iâm going to offer to help her out. On the other hand, I think the author should just outright ask her if she minds being her back up. She could even ask her if she wants to do it daily and pay her. Just communicate with your mummy friend. Not everyone can see our needs if we donât ask. But a little grace, people! 
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Because then people expect it⌠I am not saying she is right. But then she doesnât owe you nothing. You do get that right. Your & your husbandâs decision or need to work outside of your house⌠Your choice your life. Her being a stat at home mom doesnât mean she is free to take up the slack you have from not being home⌠If youâre a stay at home mom, great if you prefer to work great. If you need to work, sorry⌠But your issues are not her responsibility . And you say she nevers offers but does say yes when you ask. And you now feel as she should be offering⌠Cause what sheâs your mom⌠Her responsibilities are her children, her home, her family. Doesnât make her a bad friend⌠Other than you see her role as nothing compared to what you gotta do. Not her problem. Having to be responsible for your own child is a given⌠But having to worry about another child, someone elseâs⌠She just canât have grandma take the child for the day or⌠Point is assuming she ainât doing nothing but waiting for moms who canât be home to do their job. Again⌠Nothing wrong with not being a stay at home mom⌠Till you looking at while others arenât stepping up to do your job. Them kids are friends? And all yâall can think is your own selfish⌠And thatâs why she probably doesnât offer cause then youâd expect her to be your babysitter⌠And personally why would you want someone who doesnât want to to watch your kid. Yâall got issues
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I think maybe talking to her and asking for help would be the best thing to do, sometimes we as mommas can only stretch ourselves so thin! Itâs already so hard to take care of your own family, and to remember ask your friends if they need help sometimes isnât a priority when you have so much on your own plate. Some of us are better at offering help than others, I do my best to offer help when I can, but Iâm sure sheâd help whenever you were in need. But you canât expect her to offer it, itâs unfair.
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You cant expect people will offer. She may have her personal things to deal with, she may be struggling as a mum and taking on someone elses child might be too much for her. Itâs your situation and you have to deal with it without expecatations.
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This has to be an april foolâs joke.
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Iâm shocked you and your husband are in agreement about this! Itâs not your neighbourâs responsibility and you sound entitled! âI canât even look at herâ, âI have so much resentmentâ?! Youâre not a good friend. Childcare is 100% YOUR responsibility! You AND your husband.
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She might not want the responsibility of taking care of another child