I know if that was me I would freak out an maybe end our relationship its happen to me to an now i have been single for 5 yrs
Leave him! If you guys are married and he has a problem with you looking at his messages then I guarantee he’s done it with more than just the one girl. You need to confront him about it. A marriage is supposed to be a partnership. Push the issue, and make it known that you’re going to be heard too!
Iv been in that same situation and it hurts like hell but be strong stand your ground and tell him you seen the messages and u deserve answers if he doesn’t give you them then you no were you stand I walked and me and my kids were happy it up to you what you do girl as it’s your life you can stay with him or you can leave but don’t rush into it take time to think things through and get advice and finances in order you and your kids definitely deserve happiness no matter what you’re husband thinks xx
You should leave him! He’s going to keep doing it even if you talk to him about it… I been with my husband for 12 years and of those 12 he has been cheating on me in and off for 10 years! I leave him and then i forgive him and then he does it again! This time I’m done I am leaving next month don’t wait like I did you are going to destroy your self like me I wish I would have left the first time for good!!
Yes he will react exactly as you say, however transparency in a marriage is essential. We don’t invade each other’s things but we also use the same passwords on our stuff so if we need access for some reason it’s there.
What if we’re in an accident and the only phone we have is mine , what if I am in the hospital and he needs to call my work or get into the banking.
Transparency. My email, our Facebook isn’t private from each other.
However, I didn’t see this snapchat conversation so he could have been just being a smart alec. I’d just lay it out there, if it’s nothing you will know. If it’s something, you might can get past it once you know what it is exactly.
I don’t believe in secrecy or keeping things in. We have 25 plus years in this relationship and both feel that way and it’s worked.
Do not hesitate to ask if he’s doing this and he gets mad for you asking he’s only sorry because he got caught he’s only mad because you called him and you’re smarter than he is let him know that you will not put up with it there’s plenty of fish out there honey and I’d rather be alone personally than have a cheater. if he hasn’t already he’s thinking about it if he’s asking for pictures that’s just as bad. Ask him why I find out why it’s probably cuz he has a problem that is owned maybe his confidence needs a boost.
The fact that you are scared of him turning it on you instead of admitting his own wrong doing speaks volumes doesn’t it??? You have every right to feel the way you do! And you had every right to check up on him because he WAS doing the wrong thing!!
Once u have ur baby and ain’t pregnant anymore. Dont give that fucker anymore babies. And when ur all healed tell him then n see what happens. Bc I went threw that. I confronted my baby daddy. And he didnt like it when guys started msging me. Even tho I would never start an conversation with anybody it’s like when he does something wrong a random person would msg me out of no wheres n I knew something was up with him. Bc nobody would msg me ever. Unless my man was doing something behind my back. N I was always right. Just go with it gut feeling. N if he loves u work it out if u want. Or take a break from each other. Sure enough someone special would wanna enter your life.
Either pack his shit and change the locks or pack up and leave no questions asked. I don’t know that I would ask because it is obvious so why waste the time. When you marry it is the 2 of you no one else and if either of you cannot full fill the commitment then get out. Kids or not there’s no reason to hang on. If you stay it’s a constant reminder in the back of your head and there will always be tension which continues to lead to an unhealthy lifestyle. When children are involved your teaching them it is ok to be disrespected.
Here’s what you do. Start putting money aside for yourself. Stop paying any bills under his name. Change whatever you need to into your name. Prepare yourself mentally and emotionally then LEAVE. The fact that you are worried he will brush you off says enough and what he’s already said to this young lady already was enough for me to go ahead and leave his ass. Leave.
Is he still walking? Intact? F NO! No one deserves to be disrespected in that manner. As for the woman - if she is the sister of a friend, she knows he’s married. She needs to be dealt with too
Don’t let him turn this back on you. Tell him what you told us. I think you were supposed to find out. Sorry for your hurt. I’ve been there.
The answer is really simple… Would you allow a man to treat your daughter this way? Would you allow your son to treat his wife this way? If the answer is no, you need to leave. Children learn by example and if you allow their father to treat you like this you are teaching them it is acceptable. Good luck 
We allow people to treat us a certain way by what we tolerate…stop tolerating being berated…get out of that asap
I bet his friend would be pissed if he found out your husband was looking at his sister that way. Maybe tell his friend? Definitely talk to your husband about it. Tell him the entire story though. That you were trying to do something street by posting your pic on his snap and you seen that chick in her undies. He disrespected you and your kids. He should be ashamed of himself. Don’t let him make you feel bad about shit. He should be the one begging and apologizing. You did nothing wrong. Tell the panty girl she can have him because he’s going to do the same thing to her too. I’ve been in this situation.
My husband doesnt hide his phone and i dont hide mine… If he ever did try to keep me out of his phone i would know he was cheating.
I’d ask to see his phone… I’d ask who so and so was… I’d play dumb and so should you…
I’m a bit petty… So i would probably make myself all pretty and wear something sexy and get a sitter to watch the kids and pregnant or not pregnant go out with some friends… See if he gets jealous. If he doesn’t, im sorry honey, i would take that as he doesn’t care anymore…
I found out my boyfriend (we have two kids) payed to see who was looking at him on tinder that I didn’t know he was going on. I was going through his bank statement and saw it. You bet I went in the bedroom where he was sleeping and punched him in the head like 6 times. You don’t disrespect someone like that. You might as well go all the way if you’re going to mess around like that. Leave girl while you still can and before it’s too late
Hell with that…u have a right to be on his phone.And It was prolly harmless.If it’s his buddies sis then it’s wrong on many levels.
Your husband will be pissed because he’s been caught eyeing up some else other than his dutiful wife I would confront him but leave him because he can not be trusted and he has no respect for you
Put his bags on the porch. Get an attorney. It is not going to change. I am sure he has done this before . He just got caught this time.
I would be breaking the phone and hollering.
Hubs and I been married for three years, and have two girls 10.5 months apart. We would be seeking help to our relationship ASAP. If help (like counseling) doesn’t work, then I can say I at least tried, and his sorry ass can go 
First of all oh hell na without trust n respect their is no happy marriage second u said he wrote why dont u send me thise basically saying they tlk bk n forth shes been sending pics and hes wants more 2 me that is a hell no hes a married man n he apparently not acting like he is leave tht marriage girl u don’t deserve tht
LEAVE IMMEDIATELY! I can almost guarantee you this isn’t the first time hes done this, just the first time being caught, and you don’t deserve to compare yourself to her or wonder why you “weren’t good enough for him”. Something is wrong with him and he should’ve came to you if he was unhappy instead of searching outside your marriage.
Bye. If he loved you he would do anything to respect you even when your not around and this is just the beginning of it.
Take pictures of the messages and the pictures for proof when you go to court. He’d be HISTORY like yesterday.
Not even worth a conversation with him. I would gather the evidence and proof that I needed then pack my bags, my kids bags and LEAVE! That dirt bag!
Start sending as many half naked pics as u can to random men! & Most def let him find out about it!!! Two can play that!!!
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So um… I understand this is complicated, and having been cheated on twice by the same woman, I feel I can something. Confront them, show them , be like why?? Give them a chance to explain, if you are hurt from this, explain it to him openly don’t hide around thinking of a way to approach just, do it the sooner you talk about it the better.
Hide a laxative in his next meal . 
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Jessica said the right words. Try her way first, an if this is a problem in 7 years. Then think about another way. But in the mean time. Get a good education. You just might need you have KIDS.
I got divorced over this he was asking for women to send him pics and begging them to talk to him as far as I could tell they ignored him. But there were several. Found it on a Friday filed for divorce Monday.
It’s true it happened to me n is always in the back of my mind no matter what 
Very sad.Especially when they actually know the person. Protect your babies and yourself ,get checked for STDs and get out .
You need to confront him with what you know…and know that he most likely will lie…then leave!
Oh and another thing ,when they tell one lie theres usually more.Disrespect at the highest level that u and your children DONT DESERVE!
If he’s doing this at 5 years imagine what it will eventually escalate too 
Let me tell you something, this isn’t his first time and it won’t be his last time and I can guarantee this isn’t the first woman he has done this with, you want so badly for him to be the man you knew but he’s not, he has changed and there is nothing you can do about that, you can only control your reaction to all of it, make an ultimatum, he either completely devotes himself to you and your relationship or you will be walking out the door, please listen, you’re teaching him what you are willing to put up with, I learned the hard way.
Cheating begins in the mind then heart…I wouldn’t break up a fixable union.He prolly just needs some reassurance that he’s still a man and can still get em if he wanted.Dont mean he would do anything.
I’m sorry I am the friend you bring with if u need to kill this guy or stalk him if he goes out late night and rob his ass and take you back home like nothing happen 
From past experience, he will keep it up. Don’t be shy about confront ing him. He needs to know that he hurt you deeply! You’re trying to build a family and need his trust, love And support. Not his childish playboy days that will keep hurting you and your children. I’d give him one more chance though and then if you catch him again, leave. Be suspicious secretly now that you have good reason to be. Check his phone, look for signs. I’m sorry to say, but you’ll probably see signs off and on.
I would leave him love. If you stubbled on it accidentally that about what he is hiding from you
If you do or say nothing then his actions & behavior will escalate. Get out sooner than later.
Asking for nude pic of a woman only leads to the man wanting to connect with that woman.
I would text her and tell her this is his wife and that us very disrespectful and then confront him about it.
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Pull him up on it don’t sit around f pretending you don’t know time for him to be straight up with u maybe he’s not happy or maybe it’s something silly but I’d address it before it turns on to him cheating
He’s cheating on you. Imagine the stuff he hides if he doesn’t even bother to hide that…
My advice to you… I’ve been there done that… forgave and forgave. It cracks the foundation of the marriage. It truly does. Its painful. I tried. Lord did I try. And I’m going to say this, he said he was sorry, wont happen again, 3 months later it was again. Only the rare person is truly able to forgive and forget. And only the rare person will not do so again. I was married 5 years and after the 2nd year, I’m honestly gonna say I was only married for convenience. It played itself around my head constantly, there was no trust anymore. It finally turned into violence, arguing, fighting, and i left. Honestly the moment for me was my 5 year old son coming up to me while crying and wiping my tears away. And that’s after him yelling at his dad to leave me alone. That moment was then. Now, happy to say, I have an amazing man. Granted not what I’m used to, but I dont worry about him cheating, or lying. Hes like a protective German shepherd lol there are ones out there that will respect you. Talk to your dumbshit husband, but you need to ask yourself deep deep down, CAN you get over this breaking of trust. There can be no relationship without trust hun. My friends and family spent a few years telling me that. I learned my lesson. Maybe he will see your point and the broken marriage trust. Maybe not.
Phones are a hard thing in a relationship if you don’t want to know don’t look and if you looked and you know mind your own business as long as you and your guy are happy why bring up trouble
Leave him. It’s not the first time he’d done it. It’s the first time you caught him.
That is BULSHIT, CHEATING IS CHEATING. PICTURES OR IN PERSON. I WOULDN’T PUT UP WITH IT. WHAT WOULD HE DO IF THE TABLES WERE TURNED?
I have issues with this on both sides and pros and cons. My main issue is when you had his phone, and was gonna post yourself 
, did he know/give permission? That’s as bad as same name Facebook accounts. That’s also a self esteem issue.
Now, since you know it’s a buddy of his sister… has he known her or you longer? Do you know basis of how they talk to her? If you had his phone with permission, he would know what’s on there and if not concerned…it could be nothing. Men AND WOMEN are visual. No different in saving that photo verses when he watches porn or looks up “hot celebrities” and so on.
Did you find any proof of actually cheating? Considering your feelinge and you just don’t like it as is, you would need to express that but if you can’t, that’s concerning and to me more of a reason to leave than the Snap.
LEEEEEAAAAAVEEE
You have one life babe. ONE!!! Do not wait your precious young years with a man who doesn’t respect or appreciate you. And YOURE PREGNANT. Fuck him. It will be hard as hell but eventually when things even out for you and you are out on your own etc and living your own life with your babies… things will fall into place and get better again. And you will be so much more happier. Your prince charming can’t find you if you’re busy kissing frogs.
Confront him and hear what he says. Then confront the woman. If their stories don’t add up, get them together to fond out who is lying. All the best
The minute I see ANYTHING LIKE THIS WOULD MAKE A HUGE THING WITHOUT ANY DOUBT AND WILL TAKE MY KID AND LEAVE ! Not even talking about him being pissed haha
God I am out my skin just reading this !
Would hate him the minute I see anything like that! And if you are okay with it(asking people what to do and saying you still love him) then you are okay with it .Probably you are thinking that’s it’s a small thing where it’s not !!!
Lawyer first! Get your stuff in order! If you have joint accounts, get your own account. Remember whoever gets to the bank first wins 
. Once everything is set, things changed in your name and the lawyer has papers ready , Slap that bad boy at the dinner table and them him GOOD BYE! But… you have to calm down first! It’s easy to be pissed and want to just tell him you know about everything! Get your house in order and think clearly.
Number one why post this on social media??
My husband and I don’t use snapchat at all, don’t even have it downloaded, unfortunately (in my opinion and I know they’ll be people arguing this till their blue in that face) ALL men cheat somehow at least once. I literally do not know ANY man that hasn’t cheated on the woman they’ve been with for awhile . And I literally mean every single man I know.
Wanted to add I domt mean always physically… things on social media and texting bad things, to me are also cheating
What’s sad is he has ruined all relationships for you because you will never trust anyone again
Definitely talk to the girl. It doesent look good.
Dont let him steal your youth. I wasted the best years of my life with the wrong person.
u looked bc u knew. you’re asking bc you will stay. good luck bc nothing will change
I’d divorce and be happy instead of wasting my life on such shit 
Set up different account go on his snap chat send a pic of you stomach only and say look what you have done
You could find a real man that would respect you and treat you right.
Call her out. If she’s his buddies sister she knows he’s married and she knows who you are, what he’s told her is probably the complete opposite of the truth.
I’d separate for awhile and see if he’d fix himself. If he didn’t try then I’d divorce him
Most men cheat. And will literally swear on their mothers lives they dont…
Some men really don’t cheat
Looks like You have one that does
Personally I’d be leaving, sounds like something a teenager would do not a marriaged adult man👌
One word, divorce. He will never change
Save money. Leave. You’ll be much happier without him!!!
LEAVE!!! 99% chance of it repeating. You will waste so much time and energy for that 1% chance…
Add a picture of you, your child, and your pregnant belly. Tell her he is hers!
That is deceitful and a betrayal, no way should he be doing that
Send the picture to yourself then resend it to him in Snapchat and say " why don’t you send me these " what a pig 
Bull if he needs more attention, it’s called COMMUNICATION TRY IT ASS HOLE.
Uh don’t be scared girl! Go in on his ass!
You’re probably not gonna leave him so… talk to him, cry at him, then move on. He’ll probably continue, but hey🤷🏾♀️
Run and never look back
Confront him and I’d be telling her a thing or two. Totally disrespectful!!
Take pic send message and pic to him …" what would you do if your crappy husband was doing this to you"
Run as quick as Can and leave him.
Yeah he doesnt love you . Move on .
Snapchat a better picture back and say buh bye 
Girl run! It won’t ever stop
I would definitely talk to him.
Call his ass out and leave. Don’t turn back raise your babies to know that’s not acceptable
Look for a place to live, sign lease, get keys, close bank account and open one for you with the money, rent a uhaul, move your stuff out, change your phone number, and file for divorce. I have done it and so can you! Ask friends or family to help. The courts have divorce, do it your self work shops. He is not worth your time, energy or love.
Get an attorney,collect evidence, Save money.
pack up his shit and boy bye 
Accept it, get over it or leave. Period.
Knock him upside his head and kick his ass out!
Talking to someone like youre single while you’re married, is in my book, grounds for divorce and I’d push for alimony but that’s me.
Be Done. I hate when people ask these questions as advice. Y’all know you don’t deserve to be treated like that and just want someone to tell you otherwise. Bring it up to him, let him make an excuse and sorry ass apology and move on.
It is the most disrespectful thing he can do to his WIFE, the mother of his children, the commitment he made to you. It’s already a concern that he has attention on another female and it’s a problem if you feel that when confronting him he would get pissed or mad and that’s not okay to begin with. Even if he doesn’t get pissed, he could react apologetic or sympathetic and that is a narcissistic move he could have in him. You would not realize a narcissist if you never experienced with a narcissist person because they are so good at playing victim but will do it endlessly and you would have no idea. It usually takes people many many months or years before realizing there partner plays very tricky mind games, because we are all blind in love when we really care about someone. -Until they make us question that trust. Recognize those signs, know your worth and know where you stand. You don’t dare ever deserve to be compared to another woman. He should be giving YOU attention. He will switch the problem to you and make you feel you are at fault for even getting into his privacy. Sorry, but once you are married there is NO privacy. He doesn’t seem like a healthy partner. But what I do have to say is, don’t let years be the reason you stay, or memories, nor children. You have a future and you deserve to live with a trusted partner in ALL directions. No you don’t need someone crazy for you, you need someone who knows that absolutely nothing and no one can be above you under any circumstances. He’s looking, and it’s not fair to you at all. It’s not even right. It’s not even okay. He made a commitment. With you. With your future. With your trust. With your heart. And he broke that trust and that promise. He is searching. But he’s not searching more into you. And always remember this. The small things, they are truly and really the big things. Don’t let this go. Don’t argue about it for years. Handle the situation now and make a very important conversation with this man and demand he gives you the upmost honesty and if he doesn’t not, he is the issue and you don’t deserve that. I say forgive him because that’s the good in us, but just because you forgive it doesn’t mean that you allow. Absolutely tell him how you feel, and if he can’t even for a slight second listen - hit him where the words hurt, simply “I’m done”. It’s not okay. I’m sorry, but a person is who they are when you catch them, and who they are when you are NOT looking. I believe this. Because if a person is very true, with good morals good character and a good heart, he doesn’t have the intentions to hurt another person because his heart is so big that he knows it would hurt him if it happened to him. He did it, and it was a careless intention and he thought of you last. Who knows what he has done before. Always, guard your heart. Marriages don’t have secrets. Marriages are open with each other. Marriage is knowing that you know that person so well that you can’t even question them because they give you everything to trust about them.
Fuck Snapchat! I don’t allow that shit ever!
His excuse will be I need attention . been there … Like literally this shit happen to me 4 years ago with him 
. his excuse was i dont have enkugh attention … I said bitch we have kids my attention goes to them and school … Long story short … I left him for a while he came back to me begging me and now well I keep him on check … … Most ppl would say hes my bitch. But ehhh.
Well baby as an Ol Boomer that went through the EXACT same thing, I’m Now Divorced BUT not without HIS entire 401k, every marital asset, the entire income tax return, full custody and MAXIMUM child support for a special needs child, My ADVICE is KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT! You’re prego so I know its gonna be hard, but YOU can do it! Start taking screen shots, Build your CASE, there are even sites you can pay 19.00 and enter his information to find out WHAT and How many social media accounts he has! Start going through EVERYTHING including Email, Dont forget the SPAM! Document ALL of it, start going through ur bank statements, co for GIRLY purchases YOU didn’t make nor Receive, once you have compiled the information, Get the BEST Attorney HIS MONEY BUY! Once you have retained that Attorney, you have him SERVED on the day of YOUR choosing so the kids arent there, Have what YOU allow him to have packed, Locks changed, Constables WAITING for him in the Driveway and when he ASK What’s going on, hand him a COPY of that FILE and tell him CHECK MATE!
This is why i have commitment issues. I have dated guys that explain porn is just porn and you’ll never find a man to stop looking at it its natural and men need that visual stimulation. Chatting and photos are harmless and doesnt mean the man will cheat or has cheated. Its an ego thibg and i guess men need to feel needed and desired constantly… Yeah well i totally disagree and feel that its cheating and creating an unhealthy competitive relationship wether the porn is fake or the best friend’s little sister… It’s all wrong and makes me feel like the cheap chick you settle for. I can’t say stay or leave. This photo is of someone that is real. Its scary and deserves a conversation. If your husband shuts you down or belittles you and minimizes his betraying actions id consider my options for finding resolutions or leaving. Todays generation does not have it easy keeping Life and sex between only the 2. Its3 a complicated way of life with everything available in an instant. A strong man wouldn’t be looking at that nor would he be asking for it. This is all on his doing not on you. I know i have rambled on but you have done nothing wrong. Please consider all options for yourself and ypur family. Some people have no idea how to change. Their behavior into a full time committed partner. There are many factors in this situation but im with you. I would feel belittled and disrespected. Something i will not stay quiet about for too long. Prayers for you. May the lord guide your heart and your tongue.
Girl, the ONLY reason that man is gonna be mad about you “snooping” is because his dumbass got caught. There should never be a time in a relationship where the other should get mad if you look at their phone… and if they do, then more than likely there’s something they don’t want you seeing. Cheating begins the moment messages have to be deleted. If you’re talking to someone and feel like you should delete those messages, then you probably shouldn’t be having that conversation with them period. The world today makes relationships very difficult to thrive. But one thing I’ve learned is as a woman we have to demand that respect. You have to have standards and make sure they are following them (and not unrealistic craziness… but respect, being trustworthy, not lying, not cheating, etc) and if one of those standards are broken then there needs to be a serious conversation. I’m not saying you shouldn’t try to fix your marriage. You DEFINITELY should fight for your marriage. But there’s a difference in fighting for your marriage and then fighting for a man who will give empty promises so he can have his cake and eat it too.
Also you’re those babies mamma. And those babies are going to look up to y’all and model their relationships after yours. Don’t let them think that taking less than they deserve is the norm. If he can’t step up to be the man you need and the father they need, then y’all need to step out. Being a single mom is scary, but it’s better than letting your kids watch you get disrespected and thinking it’s what their supposed to do to their spouses.
#narcissist #girlbye he will do it again. If he’s going to be pissed instead of guilty and sorry then he’s an ass.