If you’re married, it’s both of y’alls. Not just his or yours
Oh he gonna leave you sooner or later my opinion
He’s selfish, I would get me a PT job and gety ow , show him despite u being a sahm ur still strong and independent
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Sounds like gaslighting to me
I would joke about how costly a divorce would be for him… lol 
…
What not funny… he probably just can’t take a joke… 
Samantha Schreck this dude’s a joke
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Leave his ass and never look back you can do better not every man is like him
I agree with all of the comments above. He is a narcissist and that is very mentally abusive. I would also suggest to start saving “emergency money” for yourself and your child now. You never know when you will need it and it is more difficult to start saving enough when you finally decide to get out. He never even has to know about it. Get an extra $20 cash back when you go grocery shopping and hide it where he will never find it. In-between a picture and the backing of the picture frame is a good place to start! Spread the money out though. Don’t keep it all in one spot but make sure it is untraceable and accessible. I’m sorry you are having to go through this abuse. Don’t forget there are women’s shelters out there that will help you. Abuse isn’t just physical!
And every time I’d joke back about how wack his sex is. El oh el. 
but that’s just me.
Go get a job and start setting yourself up cuz its not go na get any better…
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Sounds like he may have some control issues
Discuss it in therapy.
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Ok so first thing…we know he is being a dick…his “joke” is more than likely a deep down true feeling he has…everyone is suggesting you sit down and talk to him about how this makes you feel and that’s all well and good but you have obviously already mentioned this to him and he continues to do it…this is a major red flag…my advice is to quietly seek legal advice on you rights…open a account that he knows nothing about and start stacking some money…this dude is going to eventually show his ass and you need to be prepared for that. Your note didn’t specify if you have any job training or not prior to the baby but if you don’t, look into maybe some online classes…you can do just one or two at your pace but I have a feeling when the ass comes out, you will need to be able to get out in the job market quickly. Good luck…
If it’s mentioned more than once, he’s not joking
Shut him off sex and then say it’s a joke
He’s gaslighting you. Tell him to grow up and stop being a selfish prick. If he knows how upset his “jokes” are making you and he still does it then he doesn’t respect you. Tell him his jokes suck 
He’s gaslighting and narcissistic. If I were you I’d start looking for ways to be self reliant. Leopards don’t change their spots… if someone shows you who they are, believe it.
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It’s bugging you but u still there so
That’s fucked up and a legit form of abuse.
Nope, he’s absolutely not joking.
Ew. Literally just ew. Small man syndrome trying to make him feel big.
So many RED flags 
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He is serious & narcissistic! Without Jesus in the center it will only get worse ugh smh 
He’s a closet narcissist. That’s his way of making backhanded comments and trying to play it off as a joke. It’ll get worse.
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My husband joked like that before and I told him if I charged him for all I do he couldn’t afford me and showed him this! They owe us ,we gave up our careers to put our family first so the least they can do is appreciate it! Thanks to me being home he only has to work and I take care of cleaning ,the kids , managing everything and paying the bills (with the money he makes lol but he doesn’t have to sit and pay them, I do that! )and he doesn’t have to worry about missing work days cuz I’m here!
Ummm What a Jerk… Not OK!!!
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I would start charging him for all of the work you do as a SAHM. Charge him for baby sitting. Charge him for housekeeping. Charge him for taxi service. He has zero idea what you do for him. So, start charging him. Make him see your worth. If he doesn’t see it or pay you. Time to leave him by himself for a day with the baby. Go anywhere. Don’t answer your phone. MAKE HIM SEE!! If he’s still a dick, time to think about finding your value somewheres else.
How disrespectful and rude! What kind of husband makes his wife feel this way especially after you have expressed how it makes you feel and he continues to do it over and over again! He’s definitely gaslighting you! I’d be very cautious if I were you! He seems to be a selfish man.
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If he feels it’s so easy don’t do the house work. Don’t make his breakfast lunch or dinner. Not only do you not get paid for your job but then your undermined by your partner. You are not overreacting. That’s disrispectful. Why don’t you do part time work. Try and find childcare if that’s something that works for you now. If he feels that strongly about things being his that was purchased while being married that means should you decide to divorce things are split and that is an asset that was done doing marriage. Also if your in CA I’d just look up the divorce laws here and just be that passive aggressive type lmao I personally talk back to the person in the same manner as I did and once they are hurt I will apologize Only after I’ve made my point. Some people need a dose of their own medicine. Just tell him you were joking. Lmao. Men hate that. They dish out what they can’t take.
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He is stupid. You have already told him it bothers you. Every time he does it go out and buy yourself a piece of jewelry. Continue to tell him how much it bothers you. But a bigger jewelry box if he continues not to get it.
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All these people saying you need to go on strike and write an ‘invoice’. Why should you have to do so much work to prove to your HUSBAND that you should be a team? Eff that! You got someone to stay with? Go stay with them and see if he likes living in an empty house. He still doesn’t want to pull his thick head in after that then leave. It won’t get better. I’ve been there.
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No he is definitely gaslighting you. If you tell him its not a joke and its hurtful he should take that into consideration and not turn it around on you. Thats exactly what gaslighting is and he is being ridiculously disrespectful.
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I got out of the military when my kids were 1 1/2 and 6 mths old and was a sahm for most of it(did temp jobs on occasion) went back to work when the youngest started school …long story short I was pretty much a single mom and my now ex found out it’s not so easy being a sahm even though he didn’t do have the stuff I did…he’s gaslighting you and I’d tell him about himself:woman_shrugging:t2: but that’s me I have anger issues apparently
No whining… they respond better to actions. Don’t speak until you can be firm and logical, not emotional.
Get a part time remote job. Stop doing things for him. He’ll ask why, and after a while [days, week(s)] you can let him know then that you don’t feel appreciated so you have to do things differently in order to feel safe or comfortable.
Counseling might need to come after that if he’s as awful as this sounds.
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As soon as it’s good to start working again, go back to work. One joke would be a joke. He isn’t joking.
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Unacceptable you do have a job and that’s caring for HIS CHILDREN AND HIS HOUSEHOLD. I don’t play that ish with my husband. He don’t play that ish with me either. Everything we have is because we are a team effort. Period point blank.
He probably witnessed similar behavior and comments growing up. Get him and yourself a daily devotional to learn how to be a Christian couple and not one solely based of this world. When you got married it was for love. As your financial situation changes so does the personal side. Dhar Mann Studios puts out some short but awesome videos. There’s one where a husband put notes in birthday bags for his wife. The notes were rent, food, etc. Check them out.
Your first mistake was putting the house in HIS name… I’d rather pay more interest. There’s just too much risk and right now he is just loving you being so vulnerable! Go get yourself a job and he will have to start paying half for the daycare… his behaviour is not ok. But the women always make the sacrifices unfortunately your husband is just being a major dick.
Sorry but he is an ass. And he’s stupid. Unless you had a prenup, anything acquired during marriage is half yours. But that includes the debts as well. Good luck
He is definitely gaslighting you. Call and set up adding you name to the mortgage title paperwork for you house ASAP. And if you don’t already have them. Open a checking account. And a credit card account in only your name. Keep them active with small purchases. Just to secure your financial future.
You’ve told him repeatedly that it bothers you and still he continues. He’s nothing but a disrespectful jerk. And all that joking over and over again…makes me wonder if he believes it all to be secretly true. Can’t think of any advice. He’s your husband. You’re stuck with that. Good luck.
Tell him to make your own money, you’re going to start charging him to do his laundry, Cook his food, clean the house, do the grocery shopping etc.
Girl give him an itemized invoice for household chores you do and charge his ass the going rate, don’t forget laundry service, shopping service, around the clock child care, and anything else you may do for him. Some ppl forget that stay at home moms actually never stop working, no sick day, vacation day, weekends, holidays. Yet we get the least gratitude. If he had to pay for these services he would need two more jobs.
I would be petty because he’s intentionally being petty… Tell him that’s your baby. Your raising them. Tell him to clean his own dishes. And do his own laundry. Cook his own food. Marriage is a partnership. If he wants to start diving things up like yall are getting divorced remind him kindly that technically it’s half yours too.
That’s just my petty response.
Don’t let your husband gaslight you into thinking your not owner of half, that half isn’t something you get to be apart of… that’s mental manipulation
No. He is an ass. My husband used to do this. I walked out and left it all since it was “his” then left an invoice, due upon receipt, for all I did when I stayed home… he changed his tune and begged for me to come back. Hasnt said a single thing since. Clearly that is extreme, but if it were me, id definitely drop an invoice and see if he can afford “his house” or to buy himself anything when paying for your services since nothing is yours.
He is 100% gaslighting you. Making you feel Dependant and like you owe him an explanation on an agreed upon life choice. Then when you say its offensive to you he deflects and gets upset so you think you are being the 4sshole when actually he is being the 4sshole. You are locked down now in his eyes. This is how domestic violence starts. Be careful.
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I was a SAHM and my husband would say similar things. His was always “When you make the money I do”… One day I sat down and wrote up what it would cost if I wasn’t home. Like a Chef-$40,000 a year, a nanny $25,000 a year, a chauffeur $25,000 a year… I think you get the idea. Handed it to him and told him it appears I make more a year than you do.
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Tell him how about if you leave & take the baby to your mother’s or someplace you aren’t subjected to his disgraceful comments?? See how he likes THAT. Then DO it if necessary. Stash away 5 or 10 thousand dollars cash first so he doesn’t notice. Perfectly legal. Maybe he would prefer child support & alimony & to sell his house for a divorce settlement. He a narcissist AND stupid. Time to wake him up.
Honestly I think these comments are gaslighting you it is in fact in his name so he’s not twisting the truth which is actually what narcissists do I honestly think he was just joking was it an insensitive joke yes probably but men don’t think the same way as we do
Bill him for half the childcare, half the cost of cleaning the house, being his chef etc then tell him you will go back to work and he can foot the childcare bill.
This sounds like a narcissist…I had an ex that was just like that and it eventually turned to everything was just a joke but they weren’t jokes to me because they hurt me but I apparently was wrong for getting upset by his “jokes” him not caring that it’s bothering you is a red flag itself because if someone really cares for and loves you they would consider the fact that what they are doing is hurting you or bothersome to you and stop doing it
It doesn’t matter if your married it’s your too. Anything bought married is mural property. Tell him that, end of story. He is just being an ass, cause what he says is all crap
He’s not joking. He’s telling you he’s joking. This is something that he’s clearly no longer ok with and he’s probably building resentment towards you deep inside. The “jokes” on everything being “his” is part of the hidden resentment. He feels like he’s the only one having to work and you get to “stay home” even though you’re caring for your child and the home. I would honestly search for a job and let him know you’re going to be getting a job and that HE needs to figure out who will watch your child while you work🤷🏼♀️
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Your mistake was putting the house in just his name. It doesn’t matter about score your name always goes on it.
well besides being highly disrespectful he’s pretty stupid bc anything acquired in marriage is equitable. Also he may need to be reminded he’s YOUR partner not your landlord amd since it’s HIS money you’ll be the one to make out if you leave
He’s purposely making a joke and then blaming you for it. It’s control no matter how you look at it. These “jokes” are why I’m no longer a stay at home mom, and why I now make more on the hour than my 34 year journeyman electrician husband. Boom. 
He’s being a jerk. After you told him it bothered you he should stop with it and not get mad at you for how you feel.
It’s not a joke he’s being condescending and thinking it’s funny. It’s only going to get worse. Seven years I dealt with that attitude.
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This is dangerous behavior. Red flags flying. You needa start saving your own money or get a job. Cause he’s making you dependent on him and using it to start abuse.
That’s definitely gaslighting. Also sounds like financial abuse too but maybe he convinced you that doing this, this and this is better for the family when really it’s just better for him. My ex used to say everything was ours because we were married. He didnt have a license so he couldnt legally drive. The car was mine but he’d use it any time he wanted because it was “ours”. MY bank cards and paychecks he had access to because they were “ours”. This guy sounds the same only he’s the one working (in my relationship he was unemployed). Anyway, a good and caring partner would care about your feelings. Not blow them off and blame you for feeling some type of way over his bullying.
Just bc you’re not on the mortgage or deed doesn’t mean anything if you divorce he has to sell the house and split any money or left over bills anyway
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Don’t just be a stay at home mom. If you can’t go OUT to work, work from home. Watch videos and stuff about arts and crafts, paint paintings and make things you can sell. Make jewelry. Go audition for The Voice if you can sing. Whatever. Make stuff you can sell at craft fairs. Go to college, even online. Get a certificate, and then a degree in something. DO NOT BE “JUST” THE LITTLE WOMAN, do not define yourself in those terms, and then nobody else will be able to either.
My ex used to make these jokes… he also agreed for me to stay home… he is an ex now…
Girl he knows that in all reality, 1/2 of everything he is making is yours. Let him play his dumb dude jokes, don’t let it bother you. You ultimately hold ALL of the power.
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Cut him off and when he tries to touch you tell him it’s yours and ask him if your a couple yet or still keeping tabs
Oh here’s another one for ya to clip back at him " its cheaper to keep her " that’s a good " joke"
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Doesn’t matter what he says you are married so it’s 50 50.
Next time he wants sex, just say “Sorry but this vajayjay is MINE!”
Um yeah no… Next time… Say “um. Is there something that’s not mine?”
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Um, no, he is being an a**. My husband did that, I’d dot his eyes for him. N then tell him they his eyes best go get glasses or a doctor.
Stop doing things for him and " joke" about getting a maid , see how that works
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You need to voice your concerns and be firm.
Start " joking" about getting a boyfriend
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See how much of “his” stuff is yours in a divorce. #jokesOnHim 
He is a narcissistic jerk.
My vote is hit him over the head with a cast iron skillet.
Jokingly comment back and say “Well if we divorce everything is half yours”
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Leave and let him keep his house his money his gift basket ! It don’t get better .
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Tell him the divorce lawyer you spoke to says the house is in fact half yours ( if you leave) and when he gets upset just tell him your joking! Sounds like he’s being a dick
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He’s gaslighting you. Get two jobs-so you can leave his stupid ass.
He is a narcissist playing on your feelings. Sounds like the perfect example of gaslighting to me. He’s an ass.
Ask him to add you to the deed… if he won’t…Perhaps see a marriage councilor.
Better get your name on that house and everything else !
She’s not the brightest Candle on the birthday cake.
He sounds like a jerk.
He’s being a passive aggressive ass
He’s a narcissist…get out while you can
Throw away the husband
He’s not joking darl
Hes being a dick
Girl, these are not JOKES!
You tell him it upsets you, he continues? What a jerk.
He’s a dick. The house only being in his name was a BAD move on your part. Get a job and get rid of him. He isn’t joking, he’s mean.
What a prick! I know how that feels. He’s really not joking. I’m sure in the bottom of your heart you know that. I would not put up with that
He’s gaslighting you, 100%
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Get your name on the mortgage ASAP
Youre married, thats half of yours.
He is gaslighting 
hes a jerk! I am so sorry. Thats gross and you dont deserve that.
Gaslighting at its best. What a dick.
Throat punch him and then tell him you were just kidding around.
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I would be running to get my name on that house. I believe you would still be entitled to half regardless, but I would cover my butt. He is being a total ASS by saying things even after you have told him how it hurts you.
Woooo hunny. Gaslighting 
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