He really needs to get a grip, it’s a husband’s job to help his wife when she needs it and not everyone is organized. It’s a struggle for most everyone I know including myself so your husband needs to stop being a tool.
I can understand how having something unorganized or possibly messy would be frustrating, I too get frustrated when things are out of place.
But like, womanly duties…? And comparing you to your friends?
If I were him, and unhappy with the organization of something, I would be more than happy to help you if you asked.
If I were you, I would go ahead and get the pantry organized, and then I would have a talk with my husband.
I understand that moving, and having a baby all in the same year is incredibly stressful for both you and him, and sometimes that leads people to do or say things that aren’t okay. I would let him know that it isn’t okay to talk to me like that in the future, and it would be better to have conversations about our expectations instead of throwing phrases like “womanly duty” around.
Then if something similar happened again, it would be a big issue for me.
he sounds terrible i agree with nicole
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So, you have a 7 month old baby in a new house? And, checks notes you’re failing to fulfill your “womanly duties” by organizing the kitchen?
The day I asked my husband for help in that scenario and he came off with that would be the day I’d start plotting how to be single again. Good luck, mama.
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Tell him to shove it where the sun doesn’t shine and he can do it himself if he thinks it should be done! My husband passed away a year and a half ago. He had some antiquated ideas as well. I told him these very same words. I did love him very much, but would not take bullshit from him. He learned very quickly! This is one reason why I will not remarry! I’m to old and tired to train another man! I’m free to do as I want when I want , no one to answer too.
Let’s start off with addressing the fact that your husband is an asshole.
With that out of the way we can move on towards advice on organization if YOU want to, not because he wants you to.
I wouldn’t do nothing else for him and I mean nothing. Not clothes, not a meal, not a drank of water if he was choking. Let him figure out his life. 
Best of luck to you sis. No one is perfect tell him it is organized the way you like it. 
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Your husband is an ass. If he’s not happy, he should move on. You probably are hormonal and plus have alot on your plate right now. Maybe have another friend help you. You are going to be fine. He needs to shut the hell up. If he’s not going to be your partner in EVERYTHING, he can at least be quiet.
Not fulfilling womanly duties huh, if ever me I would just stop doing all things together, I’m not your mother so now you can cook and clean and organize and do your own laundry for your own self while I take care of this 7 month old baby. I’m sorry but as of right now your motherly duties to that baby Trump your womanly duties to your husband. You stand your ground and he if he don’t like it he can take a hike, or put it in the complaint box that is currently full
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This isn’t the 1930s tell him to do it himself if he doesn’t like it.
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This is the time for you both to enjoy your new born blessing. The house can wait
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That was a dick move on his part. However have your girlfriends come over and help you organize. Make a day for it have snacks, drinks and some good times with your friends.
Remind him you take care of a baby and organizing the kitchen is a lengthy process. Then reach out to a couple friends for help organizing your kitchen. Make labels for where you want things to go.
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Ask him why he is a sexist pig instead of helpful and supportive like all the other husbands? Especially when you’re full of pregnancy hormones and tending to a newborn 24/7. 
But this is probably not about the cabinets. Ask him if he feels super stressed about having a child and all the responsibilities that entails. Does he feel scared about meeting the financial obligations of a new house and a new baby? Is he worried about losing his job? Is he so in love with the baby and sad he has to leave to go to work and jealous that you get to stay home with the baby? (Cure: leave him with the child on his day/s off, go elsewhere and pump if you’re breastfeeding.)
Is he freaked out by what your body went through and is still going through? Maybe he feels a little guilty he put you through that. Does he worry about having sex with you because of childbirth or because you’re a mother now & somehow sex seems wrong? He may feel guilty he hasn’t helped you organize the house or feel guilty he caused you to go into labor—or any combination of the above.
Unfortunately you’ll have to keep asking what his problem is because men are socialized to bottle up feelings and emotions and avoid asking for help. I’m sorry. Usually when people are mean it is because of that perceived deficiency in themselves, so don’t beat yourself up about this—it likely has zero to do with you, but he’s lashing out because men are socialized to turn their emotions outward against others while women are socialized to turn their negative emotions inward against themselves.
A newborn and a new house and little help? Adjust your crown and cape and carry on Wonder Woman!
I would hire someone and as his “manly” duties as a “provider” will just have to pay $$ to provide this for his wife and family. By the way comparing your wife to anyone else is disgusting trait and he should be called out for that. You just had a baby and he needs to step and help his family and not bring them down. I’m so sorry you are dealing with this. My ex used to love comparing me to others and it is so hurtful and I ended up building so much resentment towards him.
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Wow that’s about the dumbest bunch of whining I have read on this bleeding heart ap.grow up and get a clue
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You just had a baby your body is still going through allot. Especially moving in to your new home, you didn’t get to nest. Yell him it’s his job as your man and the father to help because it takes 2 to make it this day in age. He shouldn’t be hurting your feeling that’s not right. I hope it gets better talk to him let him know how you u feel
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Do no one in these posts even talk to their partner at all before marriage?
Are these all blind prearranged marriages?
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Your husband is a dick. His “man” roles are to build a shed, furniture, keep the outside of the house hella clean, same with basement and garages. Before he says Anything to you, he better check himself and go do manly shit then.
He’s a misogynistic jerk. If he isn’t willing to ditch that toxic mindset, ditch him.
If you lived in Oregon, ( close ) I would help you , just because !
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Well we’re not back to the 50s yet so he needs to come into the 21st century real
Quick or I’d take the baby and visit your family for a while.
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Hubs should not be making those kind of comments. Let him know how you feel when he talks to you that way especially when your priority is your baby. Organizing pantries and cabinets is kinda a personal thing on how easy flowing you want your stuff. Look at pinterest pics and get ideas from there. Mine aren’t pretty but they function.
Your spouse is wrong!! It’s HIS kitchen too! I think you are doing amazing asking for help is hard. Congratulations on the baby 
if it bothers him he needs to help
Honey leave everything the way it is, if he wants it done he damn well can do it himself 
Go about your business
Tell him whatever he wants done, he can do it. There is no such thing as 
s or 
s work.
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It sounds like there are other issues that HE is facing. First off, I am not a psychologist and I am only speaking from a place of love and experience. So I can only share what I see in what you posted and give a response accordingly. It is a sad state of affairs, but most men don’t face their feelings very well. They have a tendency to put what is going on inside of them onto other things and people. This is what I see with your husband. Now I don’t know if the child you just had was your first of not, but it sounds like it. So here is what I see (in my humble opinion): 1.) I don’t know how long you two have been married, but certainly you can look at your time together and identify when he might have a tendency to act like he is now. Perhaps it was because of things happening at his job, or something new that has developed in your marriage that he didn’t anticipate. It could be other things, like facing the increase of bills and not enough money to meet them… 2.) You and your husband made two huge moves in your life together–bought a new house and had a baby. These can both be difficult to adjust to. There’s the feedings for your baby, the need to focus your main time on him/her, and most of all how much energy you have to paying attention to your husband’s needs after all that has transpired in a day in regard to your baby. Then there’s the matter of “intimate time” that can evaporate when you have so much to face daily. 3.) Economically, times are getting harder and harder. That alone can put a lot of stress on a household where there is only one income. So what is there to do? Well, my suggestion is to sit down and talk to your hubby (with maybe a relative taking the baby overnight so you two can spend uninterrupted time together). And talk to him about how you have noticed his behavior towards you and talk about how you can understand that there is something more than just the situation he is addressing happening. Ask him if he would be willing to talk to you about it. Hopefully you two can talk about the “big changes” and the stress of having to face other things that are developing. If he will open up then you two can talk about a “plan” to deal with it all. One of the things you might want to talk to him about is a Date Night. This would be a night where you would drop the baby off to a relative for that day and night and you get yourself ready to go out and have time with your hubby the way you used to before the baby. Make sure you two keep date night no matter what. This is your time with him. It can mean the whole difference in a marriage. And make regular time to sit down and talk to be able to meet any challenges that come your way. This takes time. So be gentle. And realize that dad may be feeling a bit neglected himself. And most of all–if you are a praying wife and mother, do so every day. Ask the Lord to lead on all of this.
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My main pantry is in the garage. Non food items like cleaners and paper products in one cabinet
Men like this need to go to an island with only men and have to take care of eachother… see how easy a “Woman’s role” really is…we need to all, as a whole, be done with men like this. They want a stay at home mom, a full-time working mom, a maid, a nanny, a personal shopper, a porn star, a Saint and all that with no words of unhappiness… Fk all that!! My guy works construction, runs his business and will still come home, do dishes after dinner, play with our kiddo, mow the lawn, go shopping, take us put for dessert after dinner and anything else that I need or he wants to do for us. Get a real man.
He is a chauvinist! In this day and age men and women do equal parts!!
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Baking goods and extra condiments in another cabinet
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Canned goods soups, veggies beans etc…
Pfft…If my husband ever said words like that too my he’d be would be laid out then kicked out. I can’t give reasonable advise because he doesn’t have a reasonable reaction or words.
Stand up for yourself and if he doesn’t like how it is then he can do it himself. That’s how that shit works. 
Help him pack his bags.
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Tell him the 40’s called and wants his 40’s mentality back.
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In my mind there’s never been “woman’s” work & “man’s” work - just work. I raised my son to believe that & his wife thanked me for raising a man of equality.
If he wants you to organize the kitchen then when he comes home from work hand over your child to him and tell him he must do everything for the kid while you organize without interruption. This includes weekends until you are done. start with one drawer. You’ll feel better in the end for it.
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I’m so sorry.
I’m sorry your husband treated you like this. I totally get being a little overwhelmed with something like this. I’m sorry your asking for help ended in him behaving like a schmuck. I hope he would be receptive if you told him how he treated you make you feel the way you do. Sounds like he wouldn’t be receptive , though, since he made the comments he did.
Not everyone has the same skill sets and he needs to understand that.
He also needs to realize this isn’t 1940 and he should take part of taking care of the home he lives in and shares with his wife and children.
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Just stay in the kitchen Karen
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With his attitude, I would tell him he is lucky to have a wife and comparing you to your friends is disposable. If he wants you to be like your friends he should have married someone like them. Spending time with your baby is more important than organizing a pantry.
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Honestly? I’d take advantage of the situation. Tell him fine, you can organize things but then he needs to take the baby out of the house for a day (go to grandparents or something idk) so you can do it without having to deal with other things because that’s something you would actually need to pay attention while you do it. Make him leave all day, it should only take a couple hours max then you have the rest of the time to yourself baby free lol get some wine or something too for during or after, maybe invite a friend over
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Your husband is a jerk.
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Hurt you? It would piss me off. Sounds like you have your hands full and instead of being helpful, he’s acting like an a**hole. He needs to learn that it’s an honor to have a woman who gives birth to his baby and runs the household. Demand some respect for that. If anyone should feel inadequate, it’s him.
Your husband sounds like a Dic*
Tell him to get busy with the carpentry then! Tell him you need shelves and organizing containers, and label makers…tell him to foot the bill for it all too.
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Omg these types of posts reinforce what a great husband I have. For the love of pete.
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Oh yikes what a chauvinistic pig. I bet he doesn’t help with baby much either huh?
If it’s that important to him, he needs to take care of all the baby’s needs while you do it. Honestly, it really does feel great - and freeing - to sort through a mountain of stuff and get it in place. If done with the right attitude, you’ll be very justifiably proud and that can carry over to organizing other things you’d like to. If organizing the kitchen will only lead to resentment, don’t do it. Communicate with your husband and tell him why the comment hurt. Listen to his side as well. There’s deeper issues here.
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Hire a professional organizer, bill him. And next time he compares you to another woman, tell him when his dick is as big as her husbands dick, he can complain.
Tell him to put things the way he wants them then you will keep it that way
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I would organize his clothes as I packed them, since he isn’t fulfilling his “manly” role as a husband, and I would tell him how much more supportive my friends husband’s are to their wife’s.
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First , he’s a jerk.
Second there are people who are interested in helping you organize your kitchen. It will cost you a bit, but well worth it.
My sister did this a long time ago and the lady cleaned the house first, then organizing the kitchen and she’s a slob so it worked out well.
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Honestly I’d take advantage of the situation. Have him buy anything that will help you organize everything 
if he can’t do that than maybe have him build shelves and other things that might help you.
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Best way to organize is to take everything out then put it back in.
I stopped reading at compare. Nope. I’m sorry your husband and the father of your child is so disrespectful to you.
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Throw the whole boy away… he’s not a man if he’s not willing to help you in the house.
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Are you able to find the frying pan !!!
Preferably heavy cast.
If he was mine this would be coming his way.
Your not the maid your his wife…
There is no i in team.
Oh my god I would be furious with this behaviour never mind the comments.
I’d be telling him !!!
You know what my female friends have besides an organised kitchen ?
Loving husbands… and I’m so envious of that.
Leave that on the table with a Dear John if the frying pan doesn’t do the trick
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If my husband ever said that to me I would tell him his arms and legs are not broken, and that women and men do not have “set” roles. Get to organizing if you want it a certain way. I work just as much as my husband if not more. There is no way I would put up with that from any man.
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He sounds like a dick. Tell him to shut his mouth and organize the damn pantry himself.
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Ok he should organize it himself. My husband has always organized our pantry and cupboards. He can see things on how they go together. I find a spot and that is where I put it until he puts it where it should go. Work together. We have been together for 39 years. The key is work together. Listen to each other. He sounds a bit too controlling
He’s just telling you the truth 
would you rather he lied
Marriage is a team or partner thing not a man/ woman thing. If one partner has a problem in any area and the other can help they should. Just having a newborn he should feel privaledged to even be fed and clothed. Even if you are a stay at home mom you are working more than the typical 40 hour week that women outside the home working put in. If he really feels this way he is in the wrong house.
I’d hire help… so it can be done right! Hopefully hurting his wallet in the process…
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Tell him to do it himself
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I also struggle with not having an organized kitchen. Along with having kitchen staples stocked at all times. I lost my mom as a teen and no one ever taught me how to keep a kitchen. Grocery shopping and all of it sends me into a panic! I know it sounds silly but its a real struggle. I too have a girlfriend that has the perfect kitchen and always has everything on hand to whip up whatever however, her mother taught her how to keep a kitchen. No help but know your not alone!
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So…the pantry/kitchen is a woman’s domain because they have vaginas?
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Just tell your husband…
“Just remember honey, that’s where the knives are kept!”
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I didn’t know there was a particular skill to keeping a kitchen:see_no_evil: I have a helper who unpacks the dishwasher and puts everthing away in the wrong place so that not even I can find it and a daughter who complains that there’s never food in the house. I guess I’ve failed that test too. 
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Tell him you’ll organize the kitchen while he watches the kids. I love organizing, it brings me joy. There are lots of tips & organizing bins on Pinterest & Amazon.
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I would tell him to to marry one of them
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Organizing a home u both live in? Key word is BOTH. This is not gender specific. He’s being ridiculous!! It’s ok to ask friends for ideas too. Organized things actually save time ONCE organized—don’t let this make u feel bad. You have many wonderful skills & talents!!!
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First off idk why it’s a woman thing and he can’t help. That’s just crazy. Why don’t you Ask one of your friends to come hang out and help you one day.
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Hire an organizer. Then husband can help by paying for it.
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Tell him to f**ck off. Sorry don’t have any better advice honestly. He sounds like 
My husband knows better then to treat me that way. He will help me or keep his mouth shut. But I also homeschool my 12yr old son. I have a 1 year old and my step daughter (8) comes to visit mainly holidays and summer due to her living 4 1/2 hours away and I’m pregnant again so he can shove it or get his ass up and help. I also work 37 hours a week at home caring for my grandmother who is wheelchair bound
Yes I would be frustrated about what he said but then I would call my friend and explain that he likes the way she has her things organized and see if she can help you cause I don’t have a clue either
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I’m assuming he’s being sexist if you’re a stay at home mum?
But with a little baby, it makes things far more difficult.
Start by pulling everything out of the cupboards. While bubs is asleep, starting sorting.
If it takes you days to complete then so be it. But at least it’s getting done.
If your husband doesn’t like it, he’ll finish it.
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Ooh but if it’s not in his manly duties what are the defined roles within the house and if he wants organised then he should help it’s his house too
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Sexist ass. Everyone eats, everyone has to help in the kitchen. Plus um hello new baby?? Yeah they’re exhausting and with no help from cave man Ug there if course it’s disorganized!! Slap the fuck outta him. Or go on “wife” strike until he helps.
He’s a jerk you deserve better there’s no such thing as womanly duties and I’ll be real if he was fulfilling his “manly duties” he’d have already organised the damn pantry and made you a coffee while you out your feet up and relaxed for being a great mother because it’s a man’s job to protect and provide isn’t it?! Him comparing you and belittling you is the very opposite of that so my advice organise your life and while you’re at it take out the trash it will be so relieving
If it’s that important to him, he needs to do it himself.
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His role as a man and partner is shared, anything your home/relationship/children need.
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personally i would scout your local area for an organiser and i would hire them to come in and do it all with you ! stuff him
Sorry but sounds like a sexist pig who still wants to treat a woman like its the 1950’s. Really annoys me, we are supposed to be equal. You deserve better hun xx
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I’d be kicking my husband’s ass personally he knows better to do that cuz he also knows I don’t have the best organizing skills and with a 6 month old baby is he stupid
Tell him if he want it done do it himself
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So you have an infant and he’s worried about an organized pantry? That’s so odd to me. If it’s something important to him then she should be helping. Not everything is your responsibility. Being a mom is a 24/7 job too.
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If organizing was easy and not a skill, there wouldn’t be show after show, multiple books, and services that you HIRE. I’m good at organizing, but it is a skill that I have learned and sometimes people’s brains just do not work the way mine does. It is not your job, even if you are a SAHM, to have everything perfect at all times. I do not care what anyone else thinks about this. Your kid and y’all’s families happiness comes first, not the way the dang food cans are facing on the shelf. Question, does your friend have a good husband who helps her and possibly makes time for her to organize? Does she enjoy doing it? If your house isn’t a pig stye and things go where they are supposed to, you’re doing fine and he’s just an unappreciative ass.
Geez. Cave Man? Organization not your strong suit, then it’s HIS responsibility to back you up just like you’d do for him. What a narrow-minded dunce. Time for a conversation. If he won’t help, pantry remains as it is.
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Put the kids to bed and organise the kitchen, I don’t see what’s so hard about it!!
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What is a “womanly role”?Tell his lazy controlling butt to do it himself if you’re not doing your “womanly role”
that ain’t a man that’s a loser 
Especially because you full on said “yeah, I’m not good with organizing, I need assistance with it, can YOU help me?” and he said he thinks it’s a woman’s duty, not a man’s. My rebuttal to him is: There are single adult men, there are gay men. In these situations there is NO woman present to do these tasks you alleged are strictly for women. Men do these things when & if they need to. You’ve been spoiled rotten clearly to the degree that you take for granted the women in your life who fulfill these roles & jobs.
Go fuck yourself, you’re divorced now:exclamation: 
organize your own house like the single men I aforementioned because you are one now, idiot 
Omgosh. What a male shovNistic pig. Run now.
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Is your husband lazy my dad helped my mom all the time now he cant because he cant walk
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Baby is priority.
Take it in small pieces
Write out where you want or easily reach stuff
Start little
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Baby wear so baby is right there and take it shelf by shelf (or section by section if your pantry is huge like mine). Figure out how you want it set up before you start so you have a plan. I have all my baking stuff together all my fruit together then also sorted by what it is (I have 4 shelves that are 8 feet long so I have the space to do it this way) all my pasta together and sauces and so on. Pull all the stuff of that one shelf and start putting it back the way you want it. If you get it all done in a day great if not then there isn’t a huge mess. I did home health for a while and one client needed theirs organized really badly. It took 4 days to do. I got a box and put stuff in that as I took things off so I had more space. Good luck and if hubby says something just tell him you are trying or see if he can care for the kids/baby on his day off so you can concentrate on just that and not kids (if you breast feed that would be the only thing to stop for when it comes to caring for the baby). 
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This is not 1960 tell him to help out or shut up ! 
I’m reading this as my husband is making ME dinner! THROW the whole man AWAY🤦♀️
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Oh, I can relate! You just wouldn’t believe some of the places we’ve lived that were awful. Then when we bought property, I wanted one place and he wanted another. We got another. I hated it. I am not organized and I’m messy. My husband would throw away my things but not his. We went round and round about this the whole 33 years. But for your husband to say that to you is just not cool at all.