I would leave if you feel disconnected and love him as your sons dad but not a husband. I think that you will be an example to your kids. It will be hard and there will be an adjustment but take it a day at a time.
go to counseling, no matter the decision you make in the end. you need to be able to coparent. individual counseling will help you identify your feelings and reactions.
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If you stay you’ll hate him and yourself. Your call.
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4 times… Are you crazy. Once is forgivable. Twice is not. Dump him and find a REAL man!
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Pretend you cheated and see how he feels about it
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It’s time to leave bcuz hes never guna stop/change bcuz ur allowing him back so ur giving him da opportunity to keep doin it
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Leave. No question here. You’re asking because you already know. It’s hard, but necessary. You and your children deserve so much better. You staying tells him that you approve of his pattern of negative and hurtful behavior. No way.
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Leave. You don’t want your sons to mimic this behavior. They will respect you when they are old enough to understand. There are better men out there for you.
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Kids would rather be from a broken home, then live in a broken home. I know first hand leaving is better than staying now and in the long run.
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Never ever ever tolerate that. It’s over with. All there is to do now is accept it and throw his ass out onto the curb!
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You deserve to be treated with love and respect. Let him go so someone special can come into your life and treat you the way a man should treat a woman 
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Once a cheater always a cheater…leave so your boys won’t think this is normal
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Omg time to kick him to the curb, your a awesome person, just do it, kick his ass out
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Just let them know daddy and mommy just can’t live together anymore. Don’t say anything bad about him. Trust me, that will come out in years to come.
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You and your boys deserve so much more than that.
Leave but don’t talk bad about your ex in front of your children they will make up their own mind when they get older you still have to raise children together
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After a 3rd time?.. and you stay? cheat on him if you going to stay. Or leave and move on girl …whatever you think is best for the kids…
If you are suffering, your children are suffering…get out! Set a better example as a parent than their father. You can do it!
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4!? Wow! It’ll keep happening. Sorry to be honest. Leave him. You’ll be much better off not worrying about him doing it again, when he probably already is. My mistake is that I didn’t leave the second time. I’m was much better off alone.
Time to bounce. You need happiness not worriness
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They will suffer more if you don’t leave him and are unhappy.
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You should be saying EX husband
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Leave. Doesn’t have to be messy. Raise your children in a healthy happy environment and one day they will be able to see a healthy relationship in the future.
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One is too many for me but 4 that’s called no respect!
Leave.
A. No one deserves to be cheated on and
B. Those kids will be better off with a happy single mom than an unhappily married wife.
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I was in a similar situation and was with him for 20 yrs. I finally decided I had to put my happiness first. I sat my 2 boys down (9 & 20) at the time and told them we were separating as I didn’t want them growing up thinking that was what a relationship and marriage was supposed to be like. Its been 3 years and I’ve remarried my childhood best friend and I couldn’t be happier and im closer to my boys now than ever. The first step is scary yes, but once you do it all falls into place.
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Time to opt out. If it cannot be resolved and all is forgiven… for sake of your sanity and boy’s happiness… might be best to separate. Keep an open communication and decision making between u both regarding your sons.
I had to make that move… my kid is well brought up from both of us having that decision.
Good luck in either way.
After that very first sentence I stopped reading to say: you already know you should have left yesterday. Please do.
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Lose him, if you don’t have trust you have nothing
Kids deserve a happy mom
Let go and live your life with you and your boys being happy and not worrying about him cheating anymore you can do this walk out don’t look back God bless you through this
Nope you should have saved yourself the heartache from the very first mistake. He does not care …and to be honest having a kid is no reason so stay with someone, especially if that someone that will continously disrespect you by cheating on you. There’s no point in any relationship if that is what he will continously do to you.
If he is cheating, then clearly he has no love or respect for you. Do not allow yourself to feel pity for him, what you feel is mutual between both of you, as he has clearly showed you 4 times already. He ain’t thinking about you when he is inside another woman, so put yourself first, guilt free, and do what’s best for you and your happiness. Your children come first, and leaving the jerk would be best for both you and your children.
Your kids will be okay with it, its so much better to leave than staying with him if you stay your kids will rensent him for cheating but resent you for staying and putting up with it! It also might teach the kids that its okay to be treated like that and they will wind up growing up putting up with it or be learning that its okay to cheat, leave him for your kids!!! Trust me I know!
Fool me once, shame on you
Fool me twice, shame on me.
Know your worth girl.
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Run Forest Run ! Seriously sounds like you are dealing with a narcissistic person who apparently has no respect for you or your child. Real men don’t cheat on their spouses and jeopardize their families, most of us take pride in that fact if truth be known.
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I really feel this right now. Im lost as well
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Leave, your happiness matter too… It you are not happy your boys will sense that. It okay to move on from a toxic relationship, you and your boys will be stronger for it.
Personally, I would leave! Firstly you don’t deserve someone that cheats all the time. Secondly you don’t want your sons thinking it’s ok to treat woman that way.
I’ve read all these previous comments. You’ve been given good advice.
Two happy homes is better then one miserable one. Your kids will suffer more with you staying. They will catch on to the vibe between you and their dad. It’s time to leave. Don’t let your kids see how he treats you, and hurts you by doing that… that teaches your kids a negative thing.
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Leave him and for the love of god do not bring the children in the middle of the adults…reassure them it had absolutely nothing to do with them. You just didnt love each other anymore. Try if you can to get a peaceful divorce. Stay friends or at least communicative with your husband. Show the children that you both can raise them together even though you are separated… speaking from experience…oh and do not put your husband down in front of the children of talk about him to your friends where the children can hear…it IS detrimental to the children to see and hear the animosity…they wont listen to you both saying you still care about them and that it WAS their fault…it is hard leaving however you must think of the life you all would have if you stayed…the marriage might get worse then just cheating…
Is this real life? You should have left at least three times ago, worst case two times ago. Boy, bye. Just think…would you like your children treated this way? And then act according to that.
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I would leave, you deserve to be happy . Tell him you want a separation
You already know what to do girl, the kids will be ok. They need a mom that is happy. Make it happen for them and move on. You’ve got this
Same here sister and the man cant last but two seconds in bed like no time to move. Girls are dumb and us good ladies pay the price.
Divorce. Once, ok… forgive… 4 times- unacceptable, he has no respect for you or your marriage
I feel you. I was lied to by my ex and the feeling got worse and worse. I hope you find someone who values and appreciates you. Do not waste your time lifes too short and theres alot of men out there. Too many to be worried about 1 who is not respecting you.
Life is to short to be unhappy for one day.
Leave. Be done. He’s making time for other women and not as much as he should for you so why waste your time. Don’t stay together just for the kids. I just turned 31 and finally figured that out after 16 years and 3 kids. They will understand someday. Better to be happy and separate than together and miserable in front of your kids.
Leave. You and your boys deserve SO MUCH better. My ex husband did the same thing. I left when my kids were 2&3. I was scared unemployed and had ZERO money thank god for my family who took us in and never blinked an eye. I meet an amazing man who has supported me and my kids from day one of us dating!!! We just married in September and we couldn’t be happier. You need to have respect for yourself and realize what a piece of sh*t he is!!! Good luck girl you’ve GOT this!!!
You deserve better. Get out!
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He’ll keep on doing the same thing cause he has the control over you knowing full well you’ll forgive the cheating prick and sleep with him the same night for make up sex , Advise dump the nasty assclown …
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GTFO, why stay? Don’t say because you have kids. F-that! He can disrespect you and his kids and YOU allowed it over and over again. I had to stop reading after the first few words. You know posting this isn’t going to get you many nice “advice” responses. YOU allowed this behavior to continue by no leaving after their first time. Only YOU can change this
I’d leave. That’s really vial and I’m so so sorry.
Adios! Get outta my house. We can have mutual respect as our son’s parents but I’m over you being my husband. You need to make arrangements to find some place to live. Then file for divorce and raise your children the best you can.
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First get all your papers in order. Bank statement, investments, make a copy of his license and social security card, any pension documents, life insurance etc. Gather as much evidence as possible regarding his infidelities. Create a folder and keep it in a safe place if possible not at your residence. Save up enough emergency cash that if and probably will get messy you have enough for food and bills. Seek a divorce attorney’s advice regarding the laws in your state. Once that is done then confront him and ask him to leave. Depending on the state if you leave he can claim abandonment. Unfortunately, he will never change and you and your boys deserve better. You do not want your boys growing up with thinking that infidelity is okay and that will happen by your husband’s repetitive behavior. I am so sorry you are going through this and wish you the absolute best. Good luck and remember YOU DESERVE BETTER!
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I know all these women are like you need to leave blah blah blah… i also know how hard it is to leave know ur entire life will change knowing that ur childrens lives will change and u dont know where to go or who to b after ten years. … i promise you its worth it… to regain your confidence. . To find your happiness again… to teach your sons that its not ok to treat thier wives and mother of thier children that way its worth it … youll be scared things will be hard at first… but one day youll wake up and youll feel like you can breath again… youll find your self and lose the women who let a man make you feel like you werent enough for so long… these women are right you should leave if not for you for your children so they grow up knowing real men dont act this way… especially if you dont love him like you should he obviously doesnt you if he had hed have thought b4 he acted … if you decide to and need a friend whose been threw it to b there for you you can add me us women should always support each other be strong momma u deserve better
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I’d leave, I’m so sorry he’s done this to you 
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Run girl! You cannot have a successful marriage without trust and it sounds like you don’t have that love for him anymore nor do you trust him.
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You just making your self miserable staying with someone you don’t love divorce him the kids is not a reason for you to stay trapped in a relationship with him you deserve better you and your sons i hope you move on and worry about making yourself happy
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Is that what you really want? Do you want to live your life completely miserable and bitter? The chances of him doing it again are highly likely. Using your kids as an excuse is never a good thing. Better be alone than with someone that can replace u time and time again.
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Should have left sooner but there is no time like the present! Have proof that he cheated and everything in order so that in court he gets what he deserves and nothing that he doesnt deserve. 
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DIVORCE!!! i went through very similar situation and one day I woke up and kicked him out. I was done being treated that way! You are better than that!
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You should’ve left before the second child, now more than one child has to go through what you put up with.
You’ll never forgive. Best to move on. For yourself. You deserve better, and you need to know that.
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Unless you want your boys to grow up and learn this, I suggest you go ahead and leave and make a better life with your kids. When your boys grow up and cheat , there’s not a damn thing you can say about it.
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Sianara baby! You are too good for that! God’s got a better plan for you!
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Shouldn’t b hard to figure out
Leave. You will not do your children any favors staying. I stayed too long. 23 years too long.
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Once a cheater- always a cheater, should’ve left after first time, just my motto…
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Separate and co parent together. Staying only is setting your boys up for poor examples on how a husband and wife should be together. Be respectful and don’t talk poorly of their dad in front of them but past that leave be done.
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He will keep doing it
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Once a cheeter always a cheeter
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Your children will suffer everyday that they see your unhappiness. It’s better to get out of that toxic relationship and respect yourself as a woman and as a mother. Your children deserve a happy mother and they need you to teach them how a man should be treated.
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You’re setting yourself up to keep getting hurt. He has nothing to lose, he knows you won’t leave. Love yourself enough to find a man you can trust, one who deserves you. You’ll be much happier
Walk away you deserve better
I would kindly put him out, file for custody, child support and spousal support. You do not want your children growing in a loveless disrespectful to their mother home.
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Why would u stay with someone who has done that 4 times he knows u won’t leave
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I’d Be rethinking my relationship with him get rid of him he’s not worth your time or effort
He will continue to cheat because he knows he can… know your worth and leave his ass! I would’ve been gone the first time
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However you allow your husband to treat you is how your sons will treat their future partners and how daughters will allow themselves to be treated. If you want your children to experience less heartbreak within their whole life, it’s time to leave.
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Well…you leave now and they can adjust…or they will really suffer as they become older and can figure our on their own how their Dad is treating you. Also, just because you forgive, doesn’t obligate you to stay. Forgiveness is for yourself…when you forgive a weight is lifted off of YOUR shoulders. YOU feel happier. Your forgiveness means nothing to him…hence the 4 times cheating.
Take care of you and your children. Be a role model by showing them some decisions in life are hard and can cause temporary heartache,.but self worth and doing what’s best for the little people who are counting ok on you, will be the best for everyone. Good luck.
I had the same situation but had 3 boys before I finally woke up. Trust me it never gets better and he will continue to cheat cuz you allow it. The struggle will be worth all the pain you go thru now. You deserve better. Buckle up buttercup and do what’s right for you and your babies. It’s all worth it in the end! Trust me. I am more happier now then I’ve ever been because I left that situation. Good luck to you
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Happier apart is better for the kids than toxic together
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It’s hard …but leave him…divorce him…still always be the dad of the boys…ypu should not live your life being miseable. That is existing not living. Make yourself happy and the boys will work it out on their own…went through it…i left his cheating ass long time ago. You will make it
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What type of example does staying together set for your kids?
You can either accept, embrace, and learn to be satisfied with the fact that you married a cheater. Or you can leave.
Either way, your kids will suffer.
They’ll learn their father was a disloyal, disrespectful, and dishonest man. Or they’ll learn their mom was a doormat who let their father screw around behind her back and said nothing.
He may actually be a great father, but he’s a terrible example to them as a good man.
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You’ve lost all trust, respect and connection with him…
And you want us to tell you what to do?
I think you know what you need to do…
Question is, are you strong enough to go ahead and do it?
I certainly did… and my boy was 6 months old.
Should have left a long time ago like ya know the first time he cheated. Like someone said before me once a cheater always a cheater. There is happiness out there it took me a very long time to find it but I did. My ex husband is nothing to me now he hasn’t seen his kids in a little over 2 years but I found someone else to step up and I have never been this happy with someone ever.
Leave his sorry ass no question and hire the best divorce lawyer
Just because he’s your children father doesn’t mean accept his cheating, he doesn’t respect you & that’s the second reason to dump his ass, I’m sorry & I know it’s easier said then done, but he needs to be left to continue his cheating
Leave. Your kids deserve to see you happy.
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Heres the thing (in my eyes) do you wanna leave and be happy or show your boys that cheating is ok?? Face it eventually whether you like it or not your boys will find out that their father cheated do you want them to think that that behavior is ok that women just get over it or do you wanna teach them its not ok and that women have feelings that women will leave men for infidelity?
You are making them suffer more by letting them think that this is how you are suppose to treat your spouse. Teach your kids that you deserve more.
He won’t change! Leopards don’t change their spots! You have to decide if you want to continue to allow him to cheat or if you want better for yourself!
I stopped reading after, he cheated 4 times. It honestly doesnt matter what follows that sentence. He isnt going to change, you already know that.
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Leave. Otherwise your sons will believe this behavior is the norm and not treat women any better than your husband’s treating you.
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Make a plan. Start saving money. Focus on you and the kids. When you have figured out financial…leave. Calm cool and collected as possible for the kids.
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You deserve so much better than that. You need to divorce him and move on with your life. Your boys will be better off growing up in separate homes than one broken home. Don’t force yourself to stay just cause you have children. They don’t deserve that responsibility on their shoulders either. You are still a person and you deserve so much better. I know it must be hard having to leave a marriage of almost 10 years but you’ve put up with so much for so long…
Umm, nope!! He’s never going to change, so go.
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