Youll allow it after he gets on the kitchen table, no pants on and poops infront of you and your mother… I think that’s a fair trade
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It’s his baby too, and though you are the one who’ll be doing all the work (birth) he needs support too. If his relationship with his mother is a good and healthy one…She should be there for him. It’s an important day for him too.
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To all the women on here telling this poor mother that she should allow someone in that she doesn’t want to to “respect” the father. SHAME SHAME SHAME on you! Dishonor on you! That is the EXACT opposite of what she needs. Birth is one of the most vulnerable things she will ever go through and to add any tiiiiny bit of stress is incorrect. Nope. MIL can be there after. I straight up told mine there was NO way on gods green earth that I’d allow her to watch me give birth. She told me that if my mom was going to be there it was only fair. I in turn told her that it wasn’t up for discussion and that trying to force me into it wasn’t fair to me. I also decided I didn’t want my mom there either which really upset her. But again. OH WELL. my body. My choice. Don’t let ANYONE make you feel guilty for choosing what is best for you and your body.
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Depending on where u r located, covid might actually help prevent that! In Nebraska, only 1 person has been able to be apart of labor and delivery and allowed at a time for the last 9mo! And I don’t foresee that changing since numbers are as high as ever.
But if that’s not the case where u r, I’d just tell him you want it to be more intimate and it only be the 2 of u. I didn’t want anyone but hubby for any of my deliveries!
Tell him when he can squeeze a watermelon out his penis then he can decide who is in the room.
Tell him that you think he needs to show ALL of his body parts, (yes I mean his Penis) to your mother and see if he changes his mind.
I had a cousin in a similar position just last year and ultimately gave in to her significant other, and let her mother in law in while she was delivering. She regrets it terribly. Wishes she would have chose her sister to stay instead like she originally wanted. Do what YOUR heart feels is right and what will make this a more comfortable experience for YOU. You are delivering this baby, hunny. Have your biggest support system with you! And YOU choose! Congratulations!
With covid I doubt they’ll
Let 3 people in there anyways. I’m due in 7 weeks and can only have one person with me
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foolish man, it was only since the 60s that husbands were allowed — and in many cases, not even at that point. now we got whole families wanting to go in and videotape the whole hoohoo
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You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. I wanted ONLY my mom and partner in there. My partner’s mom knew this. My mom stepped out to call my stepfather to let him know after 25 hrs, I needed a cesarean. She was waiting and LIED to the nurses that she was my mom in order to get in the room. I had warned the nurses that I only wanted my mom and partner and nobody else. I had her removed. If you aren’t comfortable, your labor could stall. FUCK anybody else’s feelings this is YOUR medical procedure. If there are hurt feelings, it’s too bad. Just because they are a grandparent, they aren’t entitled to be there. Anybody else’s presence but YOURS is completely optional; I’d honestly remind my partner that if he was going to keep stressing me out and potentially cause other issues, his is as well.
Dont worry, within the next 2 months restrictions will be put into place again and itll be down to 0-1 person in the room with ya so dont even stress about it.
I had my first baby 3 years ago with my husband and mother in the room. My mother-in-law didn’t expect, ask, or WANT to be in the room. She was in the waiting room with everyone else and would have came to see her before we let others in, but she went to the NICU for a week. I just had a baby in May, and my husband was the only one allowed, and I was just thankful he was even allowed in there. If I would have had to do it alone, I think I would have worked on finding someone to deliver me at home. It’s your body that is going through the experience, and it’s your choice. With my first delivery, my mother-in-law was in the room for some of the labor time, and my husband was tending to her needs more than mine, and she was distracting to him. We were newly married, and he hadn’t yet figured out how to put me first over his mother. For our second, I told him no chance, but we didn’t have a choice anyway.
I’m surprised that they are letting you have three people in there, with the numbers increasing so much on a daily basis I would be careful with that if they dont change it in the next two months. Your husband is probably feeling nervous too and wants the comfort of his mother there, that’s probably why he really wants her in the room, I would talk to him more about it, both of you lay it all on the table. Ultimately it is your choice, the more stressed you are the longer your birth experience will most likely be .
It’s your choice! You can say no to anyone being in there who your not comfortable with. Giving birth is not a show for all to see it’s a very private intimate moment between you and your partner and you should be 100 on board with who’s in there. Don’t back down momma they’ll get over it. And congratulations!
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I wouldn’t want mine in there either… If anyone’s mom is going in there, it’s mine.
Maybe leave out your sister? Idk. When I gave birth both times it was just my husband. When my sister gave birth it was like a party. Everyone and their grandma was in there. That was 2001 though lol
It is up to you and only you who is in the room with you give birth the only person the hospital staff will listen to is YOU if you don’t want someone in there they will ask them to leave. He needs to get over himself it’s about making sure you and baby are relaxed and comfortable not stressed out when about to give birth
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It’s about you and your comfort so he’ll have to get over it.
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Btw, I didn’t let anyone in the room other than my baby’s father with each child
I let my MIL. 1 because I know she’s been through birth even though it uncomfortable but the last thing she’s gonna be doing is judging you of any sorts. And 2 it would be more uncomfortable withy mother since I rarely see her… Everyone in the room was supportive to myself and the father of the baby who will need someone as well. But it was intimate between us during pushing cause everyone wasn’t up by me they had a spot either holding a leg or hand… And with Covid they have only been having 1 person allowed. But be fair, I’d you get to pick someone, so should he. That’s how I looked at it.
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I’d enlist your medical professional to explain to him how having someone you’re not comfortable with in the room can hinder your birth experience and potentially cause complications for both you and the baby. If he doesn’t get over it then, I’d say to tell him he can’t be in there either.
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I didn’t allow anyone besides my husband in the room for this exact reason. Too many people get their feelings hurt because they think they’re entitled to be apart of the process. Nope my vag is not gonna be displayed to all the nurses, the doctor AND my family. nope. Nope. Nope.
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You need a relaxed calm situation you can feel comfortable to birth in. If you’re not comfortable it’s just going to make an already uncomfy situation worse. Tell your husband that when he cans squeeze a watermelon out of his penis then he can have a say. Until then he helps support you in your decision and guide you kindly when you haven’t made one
Tell him if he keeps up like this then he will be replaced in the delivery and until he delivers a baby out of his pens, he gets NO SAY. Your labor and giving birth is about YOUR COMFORT, YOUR NEEDS AND YOUR FEELINGS NOT HIS MOTHERS.
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That would be the end of his being there too. I refuse to be in pain and someone telling me who can be there with me. Nope. I would have my mom, sister and bff… thats it. Thats all. He can go cry with his mom about what a jerk I am.
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good thing u can only have one person in with u
No no and no who cares about others feelings at this time?U let who u want in there.Its your body and your baby💙
NOPE, my ex did the same thing. It is your body. It is a stressful experience (labor pains, etc) and you do not need any more stress! If you tell them you don’t want her in there, she won’t be. She can come in after you have the baby. This is YOUR body and he needs to respect that.
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My husband was the same way! I ended up having to have a C-section do only he was allowed in. I had a bleeding complication and had to be in the or longer. My husband and daughter went to the nursery to care for the baby. My in laws and 3 sister in laws were in my room after being wheeled I’m out of the OR. I was shaking and so very uncomfortable. And didn’t get to see my baby yet other than before they took her to the nursery. My in laws were told to come when we texted, they didn’t listen. They walked past the front desk and into my room. I was super pissed. Lastly they were in the room when my daughter and husband came in. The nurses were encouraging me breast feed and my breast were all out. They seen my daughter basically the same time I did. I am still upset about it…I have gotten over it. But even my husband regrets being so pushy. My second child I called all the shots!! Do what makes you conformable!!! Have your mom and sister in there!!! Your body and your support system. Tell his mom she can be the first to visit at home.
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I understand that. My husband and mom were there for the birth of my oldest. He didn’t put up a fight because it was my 1st (he already had kids from a previous relationship). My 2nd he said he only wanted it to be me and him or I could just have my mom. I had already said my mil was not staying for either, we didn’t get along great. He needs to understand this is something that you need to be as relaxed and comfortable as possible, if she doesn’t add to that she shouldn’t be present.
You are the one giving birth. It’s your decision. I feel so badly for you that your husband is unsupportive of your wishes. It’s things like these that make me so grateful for mine. We don’t have any biological children, but if we ever did, I am 100% sure he would support whatever made me comfortable, no matter what. I don’t understand why people are so selfish.
Honestly with all 3 it was just me and him. And it was amazing
Tell him he cannot be there. I had. 4 CHILDREN
There was. 3 people with me. My doctor. MY NURSE. AND WHOEVER.
WAS AT MY HEAD. NO
FAMILY. FROM EITHER SIDE.
THIS IS PERSONAL AND PRIVATE
I only allowed him in the room. That was pre-Covid. Everyone respected the decision even my mom. I wanted her there but knew I would have to have his in there and she drives me crazy even when I’m not in labor 
I allowed my soon to be MIL in with my youngest. It was her first grandson being born. So it was my mother, MIL, and hubby. It was my third child so I was uncomfortable at first, but its the only time she would have been able to watch her grandson born. So i thought if my mothers in there why shouldnt my MIL. My MIL did ask before coming and made sure I was ok with it.
I’m curious to know where you live. The hospitals in my area are only allowing one person in the delivery room.
Alright here’s what you do tell him to spread his legs and pass a poo in front of them and then you’ll do it.
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The one thing I can tell you is you got to only do what’s comfortable for you you’re the one giving birth it is a beautiful thing but at the same time it can be really uncomfortable when the people that you don’t want there are there
He can be mad all he wants. It’s not about “who gets to be there for the birth”, it’s about who is YOUR support system and who is going to make you more comfortable. Not more uncomfortable. 
This is a major medical event for YOU, not a spectator event. Yes it’s an important time for him too but this is your medical event. I’m sorry, but until he grows a vagina and pushes a baby out of it, he doesn’t get a say. Your vagina, your show. Until that baby is actually outside of your body, this is all about you.
If you do decide to let her in. Tell her she has to stay by your head. That way she cant see all of that. However, its not really his choice. You’re the one pushing out a watermelon not him.
Nope you are the boss
I would only have my husband in the room. Everyone else can kick rocks. It’s not a party, you’re in labor, they can wait until the baby is born.
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Tell him he could sit out too if that’s how he feels. It’s not about him, he’s not going through labor or any of the pain. I personally don’t feel like anybody outside of your partner should be there or whomever your support person is if you don’t have a partner.
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Tell him to have a vasectomy and invite her for a viewing
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When he pushes a baby out of his vagina he can pick who watches!!
Is he pushing the baby out of his vagina? No? Then he can shut it.
My Mom and MIL was present for the birth of all three of my children. I felt like even though I was the one giving birth I was the only one going through a big change. If I had my mom, I wanted him to have his. But to each their own. I really think it’s something you need to talk to your spouse about. If you can’t come together on an agreement then just don’t have anyone in there, no reason in having hard feelings over something as small as who is in the delivery room. MY OPINION, OBVIOUSLY!!
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I don’t think it is fair that you get have your mom and sister and he don’t get to have his mom. It’s his baby too guys. So have the momma’s or just you and your husband. It’s only right.
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And it begins, good luck you have a long road ahead of you. You want to be supported as does he. You have 3 people to support you and he has no additional family in there. Just because you can have up to 3 doesn’t mean you need to. This is part of being a couple, major compromise. You could just have your husband in there and rest of family stays in waiting room. That’s typical and worked for my family.
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He’ll get over it and so will she!!
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If you don’t want her in the room then don’t let her in it don’t sound like you an her are all that close anyway so I would tell him to shut the hell up get out his feelings or sit out with your damn momma
I felt the same way but my husband understood how I felt and respected that. But I did also tell him if he pulled some sneaky stuff to get her in there then they could both leave the hospital and I’d have the baby without him 
When I had My Daughter (21 yrs ago) I had My Mom and Ex hubby in with Me and She wanted to be in also…guess what…She got over it. You choose what Your comfortable with.
Your choice not his. With my first son, I had my mom, him, his mother, his sister, my sister, and my son’s godmother. (The godmother was last minute) my sister I wanted there but he tried to dictate who was in the room in the end I chose for her to be there. I was up and ready to push and my doctor said whoever was in the room in the next 2 minutes was stuck in there I said whoever was in there could stay (since his brothers had left the room) and i got what i wanted. He started a HUGE fight a year later over my sister being in there like he had a choice as to who was in there.
With my second son (different father) only he was there cause of covid. If I was allowed anyone I would’ve had my mom, him, and my baby sister that time so she could see the miracle of birth since my other sister did.
He doesn’t have an option as to who’s in there you do. Tell him no, its YOUR body. You have the right to decide who sees it. If he doesn’t understand that HE doesn’t need to be there either.
Mama is the boss. You call the shots. But as a devils advocate, you’re having your mom in there, why cant he have his… me personally only had my husband in the room, no way in hell id want my mom and sister in the room.
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The doctor for my first born didn’t want anyone in the room but i wanted my hubby and my mom with me and lucky for me my mom is a force not to be reckoned with and my doctor backed off and let them stay. But unfortunately I ended up needing a c section and was still able to have my hubby in my room. My MIL never made a real attempt to have a relationship with me she never approved of me or us having kids until she found out we we’re having a girl. Luckily my hubby was on my side and okay with just him and my mom because that made me feel the safest. For me it wasn’t about being comfortable or not it was about who made me feel safe and protected because I had previously lost a child it I needed people who could help me and be there for me if things did go bad. And my MIL wasn’t that person and still isn’t that person even after 5 years.
It’s YOUR Body. Do what you are comfortable with! Giving birth is so revealing I remember my in-laws came when I was halfway naked and I was just like it is what it is. Hahaha with COVID they are only allowing one person in room so there is that too.
In europé only the dad is in the room. Just awkward with a room full of people.
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I’m a fan of just daddy in the room. Grandparents can wait 
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So with my first I was young (17) and pressured to have people I didn’t want in the room because I felt I didn’t have a say. At 27 I had my second and I only let my husband and my sister in law in the room with me and had no visitors until the next day as I had complications. I wouldn’t even allow my parents to be up at the hospital.
Do not give into something you are not comfortable with. Follow your instincts. There is a reason why you don’t feel right with her around during your most vulnerable moment. Stick with your gut and be firm. It is your body and they have to accept. You are not going against your religion by doing so. You have the right to your privacy and preferences my dear sister.
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I understand that it may be uncomfortable for you but she is your family now too. I’m afraid if you exclude her it could be toxic for your relationship( with you and your spouse,mother in law and children) I still have tension with my in laws . Your child is a blessing. A gift from God. Try and remember that. I really hope this advice is helpful
I mean I can understand both sides. Yes Dad is not the one on display and pushing out said child but this could be his first child and would like to share his joy with his mom like OP is getting to do with her mom and sister. But I also understand that OP is not comfortable with MIL and that matters a lot too. Both need to sit down and take turns saying why they want what they want. He has a right to be comfortable as well, maybe he doesn’t get along with his MIL (OP’s mom) or his SIL. In the end it’s THEIR child together and they got married bringing their families together. And they need to make a decision together or talk things out peacefully and help the other to understand their side and feelings.
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Me and my mother in law are on bad terms since I told the nurses I only wanted my husband and my sister my OWN mom wasn’t mad or upset, she told me that his mom shoved past her to the bathroom crying saying “you don’t even know how hurt I am” bc my mom made a joke saying jeez should my feelings be hurt. But it’s your RIGHT. This time around I’m not even going to tell her when I’m giving birth to avoid drama! My husband backed me up, he didn’t think it was right for her to want to be in there anyway or be upset at least she was there the moment she came out. Then she started texting my husband saying she wished all my family would just leave. So and she was able to be in there with her other daughter in law so I didn’t think she needed to be there. And she loves her hates me and IDC
How do so many mothers think that you only want people in the room, so they can see the baby being born? It’s not a show. It’s not about who either of them WANT to be there. It is about what the woman NEEDS to safely birth this baby. She NEEDS a support system. She NEEDS to feel comfortable and to not be stressed out. This is for her safety and their babies safety. If that’s not the most important thing to him, then he is not ready to even be a father.
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Rights ? The only people with any rights if any are the two people who made the baby and how are are that many people allowed anyway why so many people ?
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- he’s very selfish 2. you do not have to give into him if he tries to bring her in the hospital tell the nurses to call security and he can go to if wants to act stupid.
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Wow I’m surprised u are allowed to have that many with covid… your husband needs to respect your decision. You are the one who will be doing all the hard work. Its not about your MIL…its about YOU and who YOU want and need there as your support system! You can compromise and tell him that his mom can visit in the hospital after giving birth or wait in the waiting room while ur giving birth if thats allowed. But don’t feel obligated to do even that.
When you’re in labor the last thing you’re gonna be worried about is who is in the room with you. And if she talks or gets up in your face…tell her to shut up and back off. Simple as that. Noone is gonna look at you sideways for being a bitch while giving birth. Let her in if it means that much to him.
Ask him if he’d like your mom in a private moment when he is exposed? It’s your body that will be on display, you have the right to only want certain people in there.
Tell him no and tell him if he keeps it up he won’t be allowed in either.
It was only me and my SO in the room all 4 times. I just felt it was an intimate moment to be shared with just him and me.
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Wow. Hes so selfish. If you aren’t comfortable with her, then no.
Not many women would be ok with their mother in law being there. This guys just nuts.
Best decision I ever made? Just me and my husband.
Also, I’m shocked there is a hospital allowing you more than one person with all the Covid restrictions currently in place.
He can kiss your ass. Ask him if your mom could be there when he has his balls hanging out for hours. You choose.
Hubby only and that solves the problem.
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Ur body ur choice. I agree with u. All u need is more stress while giving birth! Tell him next baby HE HAS she can be there. Lol.
My mother told me I was denying her her right to watch her grandchild be born. I told her last time I checked, she didnt have any rights to my vagina. I was the only one who had rights to my vagina.
My husband and his youngest daughter were with me when I delivered. I didn’t even tell my mother i was going to the hospital.
Is he pushing a human out of his body? No? Ok, tell him to take a seat. My mother in law wasn’t in the room and I dont regret it. She saw the baby as soon as I gave birth. You are also very lucky most places are only allowing one support person!
Ask him how comfortable he would be with his junk all out in display for your parents or your family? It is not about what he wants, grandparents want or anyone else wants! It is about you and your comfort in the most extreme situations you will probably go through in your life.
Untill he can push a baby out his wants come after mama having baby!
Stand your ground. Tbh that’s petty of him to even be mad about it. Assure him that’s it’s nothing personal against her, you’re just not comfortable.
Depending on the Covid situation you might only be allowed 1 person … choose who you are most comfortable with… it’s your body and baby
I’d tell him to bad, if you don’t like it you can wait outside with your mom. I wouldn’t feel comfortable with my ML looking at my vag while giving birth. She should respect your decision and not make it about her and how she feels. What about how you feel, that should matter the most since you’re going to be pushing out your baby. Your body not his.
Are you having a boy? How would you feel if your future daughter in law didn’t want you in there. I understand where you are coming from but put yourself in her shoes for just a moment.
Tell him you expect her to lay infront of you for hours and take a massive shit infront of her and be okay with it, if you are not close to your MIL end of story. You’re the mother pushing out a child so the answer would be no
For my first born while I was just in labor…not ready for delivery. It was my mom my grandmother and my now exhusband. My mom would take turns switching with my mother in law. Once I got to full blown labor we asked that my mother in law wait out in the waiting room until she was born and we could allow visitors. YES it was still a lil weird with her in there but it was my compromise at the time. As it was our 1st baby and their 1st grandbaby. Now my mother in law was a little upset because my grandma was able to stay the whole time, but everyone agreed. You just have to talk it out and work something out.
its 100% up to the mom. Hell, mom could tell the nurse she doesn’t want her husband in there… and bam, he would be out. But he doesn’t have that same pull. Sorry, but the lady giving birth wins. I love my MIL but still wouldn’t want her in the room… or my own mom. Just my preference.
Tell him you feel just as uncomfortable showing his mother your lady parts as he would sharing his genitalia with your Mom and Sister. I understand she might be disappointed-that is OK. Your body parts. Your choice.
This should not even be a question. You have who you want in the room, it’s nothing to do with being ‘fair’ to both grandparents, you want your mum and your sister which is completely understandable, you will be exposing yourself at your most vulnerable to have someone there you don’t want there is wrong on every level
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Your choice, just you and hubby…
Why give that to anyone but your husband? This is such a special time for you and your husband. Why do you want to share it with anyone else? Enjoy the time just you two.
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I don’t care if there are some people on here that says put yourself in your future son shoes think about how his wife would feel if you are all up in the room all up in our personal space and everything well that’s where I’m coming from here, I prefer just me and my husband in the very beginning the first child my sister was in there along with my mom, my sister was recording, and my mom had to help hold up one of my legs because I could not fill them with the epidural, and my husband had to hold the other but me and my mother-in-law never had a very good relationship and we still don’t we’re just civil with each other but in all honestly if you didn’t put it in then maybe you shouldn’t be in there. Some girl are comfortable with ml being there amd others are not. That woman giving birth should have the final say. They are most vulnerable then. They’ll you husband to lay on a bed as if he were having a baby with his junk showing and maybe he’ll know somewhat how it feels.
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Stick to your guns it’s your pain and his gain
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Let his Mother in Law in the bathroom with him
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If you’re not comfortable it shouldn’t even be a conversation your having. But because he doesn’t understand it’s one you have to have. I don’t know if this is your first baby but the labor/birthing process is LONG and very intimate. You’re already going to be stressed and uncomfortable and you shouldn’t be adding people into that mix that aren’t going to be supportive and make you more relaxed.
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Just tell him he can visit the baby at the house when y’all are home. I had no guests at the hospital with me but told people different days they could come get that 1 on 1 time with the baby.
I’d have him and only him
Agree with talking to husband and asking him to have your mom watch while he gets a full blown physical. To get point across . Also talk to your mother in law. She might understand. I did when my grandson was born and ask if someone could get me a picture of the first time my son held him. Thats what I wanted to see . I would do anything for my daughter in law.
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Tell him he can stay at the house with her lol no thank you
Husband and wife became a new family .Having the birth is so special and a new member to this new family .let the extended family stay in waiting room to welcome baby as whole extended family
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With COVID, he’s lucky if they’ll allow him in there
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