Let…him…leave! And tell him to stay gone!
Leave him, he obviously wants that if he keeps walking out. He’s no help to you anyway so why stay with him.
I know it’s scary to be on your own. I raised 5 children by myself, with no child support. It was very hard - but I couldn’t stand the horrible life I had with him. I did the same back and forth for awhile , but nothing ever got better, so it’s your choice.
Next time he walks out, change the locks. He’ll never change and you’re better off without him.
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The next time he walks out. Change the locks!
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You are teaching your kids how to be treated! They watch everything! You need to be an example of how you want to be treated, and know your self worth! You can’t complain if you keep taking him back!! It’s a choice you keep taking him back!! Don’t say it for the kids!! Don’t use them for your decision!
I’d tell him to stay gone .
stop taking him back period
you n your kids need the peace
Simple, quit letting him back in.
You can’t fix Stupid. His grown ass running back home to his mommy. Don’t want to take responsibility. Stop letting his black ass back in. YOU can do it on your own. Think about your kids and fuck him. Make something of yourself for you and your kids. I know it’s not easy but you can do it. First start with some birth control.
Have him take his shit and stay gone! It’s not easy raising kids on your own, but it’s so worth it!! You can do it! 
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Do you really think this shit good for the kids your just scared to be without him grow up
Let his mother have him…
boy bye…
I have 4 kids ages 1,2,4,8 I can relate there but what I can’t relate on is you knowing that he as no problem walking out on you and not helping support the kids at home or the house… If my husband had walked out on me after I went through having 4 kids for him and dedicating my time and effort after he started being lazy I would throw all his shit out the house and not give him another minute of my time and effort life is to short for this mess especially for your children… mom and daddy ain’t happy babies ain’t either you found the toxic source now cut it off or cut it out … I’ve been married 8 years together 10 years you have no excuses to deal with this behavior but your own …
Stop letting him do this,
That’s just stupid saying your doing it for the kids every time he comes and pretends to love them and then leaves it will ruin their trust completely they will constantly wonder if their loved if their worth anything their blame themselves for him walking out the door they will act out badly to get his attention to get him to be apart of their life they will most likely end up self medicating with a lot of harmful things I know from first hand my mom was in and out of my life I ran the streets to get her attention it ended up with her refusing to let me see any of my siblings on my birthday to wake up I was homeless wishing I had money to go get liquor and weed to numb the pain do not let him destroy your kids I finally gave up on my mom loving me it took me having my own daughter to seriously wake up and know my worth I don’t let her around me or my kid because I’m not showing her that it’s okay for toxic people to come in and leave whenever it don’t benefit them
Let his momma keep him!
Leave, plain and simple
Surely you knew that he was lazy well before 4 kids came along. You keep letting him come back because you want things to work and keep hoping things will change. This has nothing to do with the kids at this point since he clearly isn’t being the father he should be. Leaving to stay with mommy? What a loser!
Telling you he’s an ass. Sounds like he doesn’t want to be the one to leave and “break up the family” and is hoping that you will be the bad guy here. I think you know what you need to do but you’re scared and I fully understand that. In the long run, by you leaving, you will say that it was the best decision you made for you and your children.
Kick that asshole out. If he wants to be there for you and the kids he would be. Girl you got this.
Stop letting your children be forced to live out this vicious irresponsible lifestyle. Teaching your sons how to treat their wives like shit and daughters to lay back and take abuse. Grow up lady. You can’t really be this ignorant. Pull up your pants and put your foot down before you waste another 10 years of your life and your kids too.
Leave and don’t come back. After all this time and no change? Fuck him.
Let him go for good! File for a divorce
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Alot easier said than done. However, hunny it’ll never change if you keep putting up with it and allowing him to come back… Leave his sorry ass. Either kick him out or wait until he goes back to mommy’s and change the locks. And do not give into him… You deserve so much better and frankly so do your kids. Best of luck. Huggss xxxxxxx
Leave him, he won’t change
This hurt my brain to read 
however, RUN!!!
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Better off without him …not good for the kids either leaving all the time …
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Imo he wants out but he’s waiting for you to call the quits so he doesnt come off as the bad guy to everyone else in the story
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I don’t see what you are getting out of this marriage, Walking out, I would only put up with so many times then it would stop. He wouldn’t be there. Child support would help. 3 of your kids are in school so a sitter for baby and get a part time job. File for divorce, find an atty that can assist you. Include your husband will pay for your atty (worth a try, he is the one leaving). Make a list of all the bills you will have to pay to see how you stand financially. It will help to know when searching for a job. It will be hard, I have one son and you have 4 children. Do not settle just for the paycheck. You deserve better.
Put your foot down. He leaves when he wants because he is allowed to come back so he treats it as a mini vacation. If I were you, and I mean this with the utmost respect, I would stop having his babies. Those babies are what’s keeping you there tied to him. Stop and evaluate what is happening in your life. Even if you don’t want to separate from this man child for your kids sake, they need stability and that is the one thing that is lacking from their father. I would leave for two weeks and visit family. Before you leave, have the locks changed. He wants to leave, let him be alone and feel alone. Once you come back home, do not let him in. If he wants to come back, and he will, tell him he has to earn his way back into your children’s life. If he wants to see his kids, he needs to pick them up and take them to his mothers house. The moment you give in, he will continue this cycle. Good luck.
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He is treating you and your kids like it’s his option…His kids are his responsibility…people treat u the way u allow them to…
I would start by saving extra $ and file or a divorce asap…Don’t let him back in the house make it clear to him the next time that he leaves will be the last time…Yes this will hurt but sometimes u need to feel the pain believe in yourself and move on. Best wishes for u and your family.
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He sounds like a POS get rid of him
Maybe it’s time for him to grow up.be a dad to his children not a child to them.they dont need the competition.
It will get worse. This is not something that will get better 
I’m sorry you have to go through this hun.
You messed up when you let him back the first time … now it’s like he knows he can just leave whenever and you’ll always allow him back … it’s better for your child to see you happy without him rather than miserable with him. Kick his ass to the curve and let him know he’s not allowed to do that shit anymore . It’s confusing the kids and not right.
I don’t ask myself why he is doing this I ask myself why wouldn’t he do this if he has been getting away with it then why would he stop I mean shit what man or woman wouldn’t keep having their cake and eating it to as per say put your foot down and demand some respect girl
Shut the f doir tell him.get lost you be better off on your own just lazy all wrong him mammy does everything for him ive 4 boys they do their own stuff been cookung since 5 know how make something to eat wash up.lazy mammy boy he dosnt love or kids by the sounds of it just wants free leg and you do all work if he asking who owns child fuck him.home mammy
This isn’t healthy for you or your children. If he leaves, he needs to stay gone. You need to file for divorce and draw up a custody agreement and child support. This isn’t how marriage works. This is a partnership, and it sounds like everytime you need help with your partnership tasks, he leaves out of laziness. Let him stay with his mom, and you move on and heal… maybe gain some much needed confidence. You’ll be much better off without him from what I gather.
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Let him go. Love yourself. Love your babies. Show them what love truly is. You all deserve better
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Just let him go. He’s not invested in this marriage. He sounds immature, when life gets tough, he runs back to mommy! He should go stay with her, you have enough responsibility with four kids.
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Divorce and get a good husband
Ask God for peace and he will ease your pain and see you through,open your mouth and ask God for peace so you can function for yourself and your children,the situation keep you confused don’t let it or him do that,peace
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For the sake of the children don’t let him back. Instead show them you can have a healthy co parenting friendship and find someone that will treat you right.
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The kids need stability not a part time Dad.
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Dont stay for the kids sake. Kids need to know a parent will be there regardless if both parents are together or not. Its better for those kids to see their mama happy and in a good relationship or single rather than in a relationship that isnt stable and isnt role model worthy. You are those kids teather and role model. Teach them they shouldnt settle for anything less than they deserve. You deserve so much more mama. You have been there for those kids and have never left their side. If the father doesnt want to be in their lives because yall arent together then thats his choice and you cant force someone to care or love your children. As long as you do thats all that matters. Youre raising them not him.
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Tell him he can’t come back… and that if you and the kids aren’t a priority to him… You are done making him a priority in your lifes… Screw that man-child
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Do something about the situation now or it will only get worse…prayers
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Don’t let him back, start getting your duck in a row and the next time he walks out don’t take him back. You are enabling this behavior. He won’t change. And obviously his mother is allowing it also.
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Tell him next time he leaves it’s permanent. You allow him to come back so there are no consequences for his behavior. A real man wouldn’t walk out on his wife and 4 children.
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Stop letting this sad sack back. It’s NOT good for the kids or you. He needs to get some therapy and deal with the reason why he can create kids and a relationship but can’t take care or nurture what he’s created. It’s not your job to wait around . If you do everything then why do you need him around? You can love him from afar. No kiss should watch this and think it’s ok. It’s not. Let him leave. Go to couples counseling and set some damn boundaries. If he wants out then let him out. You have to be there for the kids.
The next time he walks out - let him. Don’t let him weasel his way back in.
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Girl. The best advice I can give you. Is let him walk out. You can’t make someone who don’t wanna be there. Be there. You deserve better. You are better. And you know better. Life is too short to be wasting time on a man who doesn’t give you what you need. Not all love stories end in a fairytale ending. Some love stories just end. And that’s ok. Don’t let you children see this pattern of behavior as normal. Let them see you respect yourself enough to put a stop to it. Normalize that. Kids will imitate what they see. No matter what you tell them. If you have son’s. Do you want them to grow up and do this to their partners. Or the girls allow this shit to happen to them. Remember, love is gonna hurt. But you take the brunt of it, so your kids don’t have too. Be the example they need you to be. You got this. It will be hard. But it will be worth it. You can do bad all by yourself. You don’t need help to do it. You already know what the truth and answer is. Or you wouldn’t be here trying to validate a feeling you know to be right. Good luck.
Ya,just say bye bye.
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Let the ass go,He is running your life
Don’t let the excuse of keeping him for the kids sake ruin your life,if he loved you he would worship the ground you walk on you have 4 kids he will have to pay support on.get rid of him for your own sake.you are worthy.
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I can imagine it’s hard but if its so easy for him to up and go he clearly thinks very little of his family. What would you tell your daughter if she was being treated like this? You need to get rid of him and show your children boys and girls this is not how you maintain a healthy relationship. Xx
Yea you got a dud sorry.trade em in
I had the same issues with my ex(Childrens dad) running off to his Mums all the time. They take advantage and they know they can come and go when they please and come back when they want… just leave him walk out show you don’t care even if you do… get on with things he will soon realise and be messaging when he knows he’s not needed giving his sob story but stand up for yourself girl! 
Dont waste your time waiting around for him to come back… not fair on you or the children! You deserve better someone who’s around full term and acts like a man:smiling_face: X
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Next time he walks out, let him. Then change the locks and file for divorce.
I don’t know you, but I know you and your kids deserve better in life than always wondering if he’s coming back or leaving again. Kids need consistency
You’re teaching your kids it’s okay to stay in a toxic relationship. So quit letting him come back, when he walks out keep him out
Buh byeeeee if he isn’t benefiting you by staying let him leave
Sorry, I’m having a hard time even understanding what OP is trying to convey because of typos
Kick him out and you walk away. Bye bye
Why would you keep having children by this man? Time to let his ass go! Unless he provides, and if you love him I guess keep trying to make it work.
Don’t let him come back
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Staying together “for the kids” is not a good enough reason. You deserve to be treated well. You deserve respect. You do not need someone who isn’t going to give 100% to the relationship. If he keeps walking out, let him stay gone. He’s making the conscious choice to walk, you’re not kicking him out. Children deserve parents who are there not in and out of their lives at the drop of a hat. He sounds like he needs to grow up and get it together. I’d sit him down and tell him either he’s in 100%, he’s committed to making it work, he’s never walking out on y’all again and he’s going to step up and be the husband and father you and the children need or he can take his butt back to his mommy’s house and its over. It sucks to have to lay down the law like that and it will hurt like hell if he chooses to leave but you have to stop allowing him to treat you and your kids this way.
Grow a spine and kick him out.
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It doesn’t sound like that man knows how to love you or those kids. Seeing their mom happy is going to make a bigger difference than it would for him to be around. Especially if he can’t act right. And you don’t want your kids to mirror any of this later on in life. I would leave and he needs therapy.
When a friend asked me if I would be ok with my daughters being treated as I was by my kids’ dad and told me to think about my own mom and dad~
“Do you think they wanted this for their little girl?”
…after she said that, I was willing to lose everything to get away from my toxic af ex. It’s not easy, but it was for the best.
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If it were me if he walked out again that would be his last time of walking out. Locks would be changed clothing on the porch.if he is walking out he is no help to anyone and s poor influence on those kids. If you are going to lay down expect him to walk on you
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You and your kids deserve better. Kick him to the kerb.
Throw the whole ass guy away ! That’s not even a man
For “the kids” sake he needs to go girl
Sounds like you doing it on your own now so what’s holding you back from doing it
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I went through that too. I finally realized my kids were suffering for it and made him leave for good. He’s been gone a year and a half, he’s 46 and living with his mother still. It was obvious he just wanted to control me and when that control was gone he fell apart. Now I’m in a much better place in my life and happy.
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Stop him right now you need to tell him kick rocks what would be the loss if he wasn’t there he doesn’t help you anyway he gives you heartache and more things to worry about you are a busy mom you get his ass to court make him get a job and pay for four kids with child support once he works full-time he’s not gonna have time to worry about anything else he’s got too much time in his hands learn to love yourself and know you are worth more than that, through all this you have lost yourself you need to look in the mirror and say we are worth more than that. Most likely he has your self-esteem to where you think you couldn’t get anybody else telling you you have four kids good luck or something like that most likely this is not true I would tell him pack it up change your locks, don’t except his calls tell him to take me to court he is teaching your children they can’t trust men if you have sons they will be just like him your daughters will marry somebody just like him don’t beat the streets love yourself girl!!!
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Its not going to get better.
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Do not sleep with this man again for sure!!! He is probably not at his mothers. You better formulate a plan on how you will be a single mother
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Next time he leave let it be his last
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Your children will grown up thinking this is normal and acceptable. It’s disrespectful and abusive to you. Find someone that will be your partner. Get rid of the deadbeat.
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After reading your post I think you know what you have to do
It will be tough for awhile but eventually without having to do for him too you will find it only gets easier
Sending love and healing 
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Birth control, most states you can’t get alimony until 10 yrs of marriage.
Start preparing for divorce.
Save money! Start school for a trade or degree. Open a savings account at a separate bank and have statements sent somewhere else.
Declutter, simplify your belongings, and organize; once he’s gone you will have zero help. It helps to live simple by getting rid of the unnecessary.
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Know your worth Mama! Been in the same exact situation. Find your happiness and focus on your children. When he leaves DONT let him come back.
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You know he leaves you and because you’ve accepted it this long. It will continue from here on out UNLESS YOU DO SOMETHING BIG. Change the locks. Make him wait. Make him lay in the bed he had been making for himself all these years. Grow your own nest that has NOTHING to do with him. Make it all yours and protect it fiercely. Let him see that you DO NOT NEED HIS LAZY ASS. He won’t get it together. He won’t learn. That’s okay because YOU WILL. You’ll outlive that poor sap and have a much higher quality life too. Give yourself that better quality life. He will not ever bring it to you.
Sadly, he’s shown his true colors time and time again. He can’t committ and is not stable. There is no true love there anymore therefore the foundation is crumbling and cannot be repaired unless he seeks professional help to figure out what the underlying issues are and why he’s behaving so inconsistently and so irrationally. He is negatively affecting his relationship with his children and family unit as a whole. The amount of stress and pressure put upon you is way more immense than anyone deserves. You all deserve the happy and fulfilling life we all want and he is obviously unhappy and unable to have that despite your efforts and despite you giving him chance after chance to redeem himself and be the husband and father y’all are entitled to.
I’m so sad that the role model and loving DAD the kids needed has turned his back on them. I’m sure they are extremely hurt as are you.
Let him go be miserable by himself so y’all can start thriving on your own. Prayers coming in hot 
Please leave him to be a child . You should want more for yourself . Take care of yourself ,stress is not good for you and the baby.
honey there’s your problem. You keep letting him come back. Kick him so far to the curb and then file for child support!!! Make him help financially. And he’s hurting your kids!!
1 get help go to a family member or close friends
2. Write everything down on note pad when he leaves he says anything horrible to you
3. Tell he to go and it’s over you can do better than that Hun xx may be a support worker
Think about you and your children they come first that’s all that matters xx good luck hope you get the help you are looking for x🤞
My husband works his butt off. We had 2 children . I was a stay at home mom. I kept my home clean and cooked every night. I feel that is what IT WAS MY RESPONSIBILITY. IF YOUR HUSBAND CHEATS ON YOU, MAYBE YOU SHOULD kick his butt out. Life is to short to be up set .oh what I had to say is during our marriage to raised our kids and 17 others on our own expense. My house was clean and dinner cooked every nights .I was glad I did it.
When he leaves lock the door and stop giving him the option to come back! You deserve better than what he’s offering and your teaching your children that it’s okay to treat someone this way. Sorry for the hard truths but don’t have time to sugar coat it! Stop being a doormat.
By letting him stay you are teaching your children that his behaviour is acceptable. For the children, he will need to acknowledge his issue and seek help or you should leave. You are not an option, you are worth so much more than a partner who hasn’t grown up yet.
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Do not let him define your value… and you are a momma bear now, not just his wife. You are a teacher and role model for those kids… and so is he or the absence of him. They will remember who was there and who wasn’t. It’s not your fault so do not allow it. Once is too many times. Marriage is supposed to be a bond and once he broke that bond you no longer have an obligation to repair it. You need to do what’s best for you and your kids and if you allow this behavior to go on any further you are also doing damage to yourself and your children for staying. They are impressionable and this is impacting,molding the kinds of relationships they will have in the future with each other, friends, future boyfriends/ girlfriends/ spouses… Show them you deserve better and so do they. I wish your family the best of luck
You and your children are the first you take care of. Be strong stand up take hold of your future. Dump the lazy man. Hire a lawyer who will go after him and help yourself and children. Don’t let anyone walk on you.
You are not letting him back because of the kids you want him back.you have to not let him back because of the kids
See if you can get him into marriage counseling, maybe a minister…asap. A lot of people don’t really know how to care and love, they need to be taught and guided.
Sis yes, it is time to focus on you and your babies.
Take his keys and leave him with his mum for reeducation.
Say goodbye to your ex-husband
Next time he walks out, lock the door.
I had a hard time reading this
Let him go and stay gone.
Let him and keep going