Working nights is a hard adjustment mentally and physically. Give him time to adjust. However, communication could be more appropriate on his part. I worked nights as a nurse and I only got 2-4 hours of decent sleep.
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3rd shift is so difficult on your body, and it’s sleeping patterns. It took me a solid 6 months to adjust and find what worked. I’d say give him time to adjust, but set expectations and boundaries too. It’s not easy, on either party, for sure. You need to find a common ground, and agree to it. For instance, off days need to be with family. Maybe set one or two nights where he joins the family for dinner, and then gets a quick nap before work.
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I worked night shift at the hospital where I live and it is ROUGH give him some time I would come home and crash and wake up in time to get up and do it all again… I hated feeling like I wasn’t spending time with them but I was so exhausted all the time
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Working night shift takes a huge toll on a person’s body and mind forcing urself to be awake at night goes against literally everything u have conditioned your body to do since birth. We r not nocturnal animals cut him a little slack. It took my husband over 6 months to adjust to night shift and for him to be able to pull himself out of bed at a decent time. Everyone is different and so are their bodies. I definitely would be doing the same thing he is but without the arguing…
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I worked Graveyard at a Mental Intstitution for 7.5yrs straight and did double shifts where I stayed and worked A.M. shift at least once a week and I can honestly say I was never an asshole and still only slept a few hours so I could get up cook, clean, run errands, etc… and then do it all over again. Working graveyard shift definitely doesn’t give u a pass to be an ass that’s for sure. It seems as tho he is already checked out from the relationship and family and is looking for any excuse to be let free and out on his own. I am so sorry that u have to go thru these trials and tribulations by ur self and picking up the slack for another very capable human who chooses to self isolate and sleep his life away. I pray that things get better for you soon, take care and God Bless 
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I used to work this shift myself and it is really really hard on your body it really truly is and he just started it. I get that you dont get it and its hard for you because you are dealing with everything else during the day which is a lot. But its really hard on your body and its not quality sleep he is getting. Give him some time to get on a schedule and maybe explain it a different way like hey we miss you or hey i made you dinner before work we would love to see you… this is a common issue for a noc shift family you are definitely not alone but give him some slack and understanding maybe get him some black out curtains and an eye mask and ear plugs so he gets better sleep and wont need so much sleep.
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Working nights is a beast. My husband is on a rotating shift where they work days for 4 months, then nights for 4 months, and back and forth. We’ve been married for 18 years and we struggle with the night shift rotation. We’re solid. Yet, we struggle. He never feels rested. We don’t get much family time. He has the worst attitude through this. Snappy, short, curt. Patience is tough but necessary. The body isn’t used to working this way and it messes with everything. I hope you guys find your way 
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3rd shift is the hardest of all shifts. He will never adjust to it and yes he will be cranky when up. Read up on it, how it effects your internal clock and the magnetics of changing your system.
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You need a good amount of time to adjust to 3rd shift… he’s going to be exhausted even after he sleeps well. I am in sleep medicine and conduct sleep studies. I work 3rd shift. It took me 6 months to acclimate. Some people need medication to stay awake because of the toll 3rd shift takes on the body.
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Some things you said he said. I work and you still find something to bitch about. Do you have friends outside the home? Do you socialize at all. Stay at home parents can sometimes overwhelm overwhelmed spouse because they need the adult interaction that they are missing. Do you tell him about the good things that happen during the day or just the bad? “Go ahead and kick me out” he is feeling very detached from the family. Do you ever grab a nap with him? There’s a lot of unbox here.
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My husband worked from 5pm to 6 am and would sleep all day I told him it bothered me since we never got to see each other and we have a one year old. A week later he got his shift changed for us.
I never did adjust to graveyard shift. All I did in my off hours was try to sleep and no amount of sleep I got ever made me feel even remotely rested, even with meds, melatonin, and good sleep hygiene. My mental alertness suffered greatly, couldn’t remember conversations I had, and finally ended up rear-ending someone. I barely tapped them but it scared the living daylights out of me and I got a different position ASAP.
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I work 7pm to 7am and I’m taking a new position on day shift for this very reason. I do nothing but sleep and work three days a week but getting back to normal on those 4 days a week I’m off is next to impossible (for me anyway). I saw the toll it was taking on my family and knew I had to make a change.
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Third shift is brutal. Just express that you’d like a couple hours of time with him or the kids want a little bit of time. Maybe make days off a special event?
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I’ve worked nights for years and I feel like absolute shit 99% of the time. What time I’m not sleeping or working I’m showering or eating. There’s no time for anything else because I’m constantly drained. Go easy on him if it’s only been a month. He’s probably not doing it on purpose.
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3rd shift is killer! It take months sometimes longer for your body to adjust. Some people are made for it and some are not. I work till 0730 come home get a drink and goto bed and back up at 3. He has to get a schedule. Worse thing to do is eat breakfast when he comes home. If her gets up to eat at say 5 he needs to stay up. Sleeping after you ate a meal is not healthy for anyone. And over sleeping is VERY EASY to do. Until you work 3rd shift you won’t get it.
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Let that man sleep. 3rd shift is hard to adjust to. What’s the difference in him sleeping after he gets off work and you sleeping after you’re done for the day?
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Give him time to adjust. If hes new to shift then give it time. My husband works graves 7 pm to 6 am or later. He sleeps til about 330 4 depending on how close to 6 am he is off and I get to spend a solid few hrs w him everyday before he leave again. Also he prob isn’t getting restful sleep if you’re in the house making noise or if there are children in the house. I would suggest getting black out curtains and ear plugs and trying to keep a quiet house so he can get some quality sleep.
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I work graveyard and it is so hard on my body, I don’t know what type of work he does but I am sure he is exhausted. Working nights is hard and until you’ve done it yourself you will really never know have it affects a person. Also age is a big factor when I started nights as a 20ish year old I didn’t need much sleep…now I can’t get enough and always feel like a zombie
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It sounds like you are both frustrated & don’t know how to communicate what you’re feeling. My 1st thought would be that he’s overwhelmed & depressed. & you can’t mother him/ tell him to or not to do something. If you can’t have an actual conversation without a fight start with writing a letter & don’t do it in a way that it feels like your attacking him… what are you feeling? Tell him you miss him, your sad he doesn’t spend time with you & the kids… you feel alone, etc. It may be that he’s feeling some of the same things but either feels depressed/ has no choice or that since all you guys do is fight he’s avoiding you/avoiding fighting
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Um, have you ever worked night shift? I am asking in the nicest way. It is a different type of tired.
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Night shift is hard on the whole family. I would suggest he take part in dinner bath time routine to help. Is it hard labor? Will he switch back to day shift eventually. If he doesn’t want to help and respect the family he helped create and would rather be “kicked out”, then decision should be made for you and the kids. WILL he get a new job ( because literally the whole country is hiring) or does he want to be stuck in something that benefits no one.
I don’t believe you’re overreacting at all. My husband also works 3rd shift and it’s his choice to be up around 5 for family time. Granted, there are days I let him sleep longer because I know he needs sleep.
But in my opinion, he should be wanting that as well. Yes, it takes time to get used to… but it’s no different than working 8-5, going straight to bed and waking up to only get ready for work. That’s just not fair, especially to your family. And for him to say what he said it you is awful
I used to work late night shifts 8pm-5:30am and it kicked my ass! I don’t think you are wrong though, but do try to understand he’s probably dead tired. I was having full blown break downs crying because of lack of sleep. Sleep deprivation can really mess with your mental health. I had to switch shifts because it was affecting my home life, maybe talk to him about a shift change.
Night shifts really mess with your body clock (also why the pay rate is higher for these shifts too). If he’s new to night shifts you really need to give him time to adjust to the change. When my husband did nights and he tried getting up earlier to be with the family, he’d just constantly fall asleep on the sofa etc, and then on his days off he would be like a zombie.
I think you need to let him do what he needs to do when he’s working and enjoy family times on his days off.
I get it though, I found it very frustrating but I think you got a reaction like you did because he probably feels crap and guilty anyway. Give it a few more weeks to see if things improve. Some people adapt to it and can cope, others can’t and the nightshift isn’t for everyone. If it is going to affect your family so much he needs to find a more suitable job.
Graveyard shift is brutal and messes with your internal clock and if he’s depressed due to you guys having relationship problems it’s a double whammy. I found with men it’s how you talk to them. Like instead of saying could you get up and help with the kids you could have said I really miss spending time with you do you think you could try to get up a little earlier so we could have some time together. It’s tough but honestly him sleeping 12hrs sounds about right for having your whole internal clock messed up.
That’s too damn long to be sleeping period. It sounds like he’s using sleep to avoid you and his children. Based off his response he doesn’t sound happy and not only giving you a reason but waiting on you to end it…
My husband worked that shift and still got up and helped with the kids. we still did stuff as a family. Everyone is different though maybe he just needs to get used to it
My fiancé started the same shift back in December. Took 2 months for him to adjust. Now he comes home, sleeps til 1, and then from 1-8 he’s up with me helping with my son or cleaning. And then naps from 8-9:45 gets up and gets ready for work then heads out. Then we text all night and he facetimes my son to say good night around 11:45. It’s definitely do able. He doesn’t complain. If he’s saying that kind of stuff he’s not happy to provide for his family. I know damn well if you got the same job same shift you’d adjust and do 10x the work.
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I was mean when I worked nights and when I switched to days my hubby went to nights. He was always tired and more often than not, cranky. The body isn’t made to work while others sleep and join the lives of the ‘day People’ too. We both worked 7p-7a and got up to eat dinner with the family. We only worked 3 nights and it was still horrible. I can’t imagine life when working more nights than 3. Have a ton of grace, he’s slowly dying of exhaustion… We are both on day shift now and our family life and marriage are better.
If he’s genuinely sleeping all that time there may be an adjustment period to the new hours or some health issues going on and it’s also a sign of depression. Many factors could be going on here besides The conclusion so many are jumping to that he’s just selfish. Nobody can make themselves sleep if they’re not tired and their body doesn’t need it. I can’t stand how people are so quick to tell someone else to put their partner to the curb and upend their children’s entire lives over something that can be worked out with a little bit of patience and communication. You think it’s hard now what you gonna do when you don’t have the extra income and no one to help you at all when it could be that you simply needed to work it out with each other and give some grace.
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Ok, i dont usually comment but, coming from someone who worked night shift from 10pm - 6am, that is an insane amount of time to be “asleep” and i dont think its actually good for you to be out so long even working a weird shift like that. I live a half hour from my work and my morning crew was late 90 percent of the time so i left closer to 6:30 also we didnt really have breaks. I came home and went straight to bed at about 7am ish and woke up around 11-2 in the afternoon, mind you i dont have kids yet, but i wouod get up, eat, clean my house, watch tv, whatever i needed to do and take a nap around 4-5pm, wake up when my husband got home and have dinner and hangout before i had to leave at 9:30. Personally if my husband said those things to me after just asking for help with the kids that we made together, bye, see you later, in courts with divorce and custody papers.
I go through the same thing and my husband works 2nd and still sleeps like that. Its so annoying and honestly puts a wedge between us. I have given up complaining but its hard doing everything while someone else just sleeps and we both work
I know from experience that working those hours are hard on the body and mind, but sleeping that long is not good for your mental health, he probably just needs some time to adjust.
Sounds like this shift isn’t the right fit for him if he is that tired. And I hear from stay at home moms that they are frustrated the working partner isn’t as helpful and engaged at home enough. It’s a common problem😢
I don’t think you are overreacting. My SO does this and it drives me nuts. He’s not even third shift, he works regular day shift (though late) and sleeps 12 hours also. It’s maddening. As if work is the only thing they are responsible for.
Night shift is difficult. It’s really hard to get used to. But you know what else causes excessive sleepiness? Depression. Especially with that last comment, I’m concerned his mental health has taken a nosedive. Please cut him some slack and approach him with concern and kindness. You’re gonna have to swallow some pride and not play the “well I have it so much worse” card. His struggles are not a personal attack on you. Let him feel safe to come to you with what is bothering him, he may need some help in getting there because men’s mental health has been shat on for a long time. A lot of them don’t know how to communicate their issues well. Please take it from me, my daughter’s father was doing the same thing, working and then coming home and sleeping. He was majorly depressed. What helped him a lot was listening to him and talking to him constructively about what was going on. I had to learn this the hard way but if I didn’t things were going to be miserable. It took me seeing him break down and cry and tell me he didn’t want to exist anymore to finally get he was barely hanging on. Much worse than me. Maybe he doesn’t want to admit he can’t do this new job and he may feel like a failure admitting that. Just let him know he’s not and his mental well-being is more important than money.
Night shift is exhausting. Thats true. His reply suggests things may/are very challenging and that you are miscommunicating with each other. How do you understand his needs? How does he understand yours? Their have been studies on the longterm effects of shiftwork. The evidence suggests that at 8am he might not be getting quality sleep. Replicating as close to sleep wake cycles by going to bed in the PMs is better for more restful sleep (ie in bed at 11.30am for sleep between 12noon-9pm). Perhaps family ‘meal’ time is actually breakfast? With him taking kids to school?
His days off might shift a bit to a ‘late’ dinner together at 7.30/8pm and family movie night / helping with homework. Ask him about how shift work is for him/his body? He may be struggling and exhausted. If so consider chatting with doctor as well.
Goodluck xx
He could be out running the streets and cheating on you or doing drugs but instead he is home… if I were you I would be appreciative and grateful that you have someone who actually is willing to provide for you and your family… I raise my 2 kids with no help whatsoever. Definitely give him time to adjust and communicate cause honestly he doesn’t sound like a terrible guy… just frustrated and tired… !!! Hope it all works out for you…!!! Be patient and kind… if you kick him out or leave him you will still be alone so there is no harm in trying to be mote understanding…
I know it’s alot but it’s a working man , sounds like he needs a day job are something less hours
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I have just started working Again after a few years and night shift absolutely kicks my arse as a factor process worker, I can easy sleep 12hrs after a shift if im not so fatigued 4-8 hrs, I think he hasn’t had enough time to readjust to working them hrs, as a mum of 4 I personally hate the fact I can’t physically spend alot of time with the kids as much but hubby understands (his got a injury cant work), now this is my opinion,
I think this while thing is communication issue, yes there is more giving then taking but also is there shared responsibility as such a job?
I personally think be adults sit down have a adult conversation and sort your shit out if it doesn’t work walk away.
From experience, it is a HARD thing working 3rd shift.
You feel exhausted ALL the time, & you literally have no life.
You can’t just switch up hours on your days off to “be a part of the family”, you get made to feel like a lazy person by those with a regular schedule…
It’s NOT easy. Let off of him & let him get adjusted to the job, the hours, the new sleeping pattern. It won’t be like this forever, but you do have to acknowledge that his hours are different then “family hours” now unfortunately. & If it’s good money & you need the money, don’t be another source of stress for him.
It takes adjustments from the whole family.
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That shift sucks because that is really all you do his work and sleep. My mom worked this shift and yeah same as you describe… Ugh !!!
Being the spouse of a night shifter I can absolutely relate to your struggle. However, he is only 1 month in and it takes probably 6 months to a year for them to readjust to the night shift. It is an absolute struggle someday, and I will not term you that it’s easy or you’re overreacting, but he is also going through lots of mental changes and his brain also requires that rest. Pick up the slack as best as you can without resenting him, and he will eventually reacclimate himself to a more normal routine. My husband is on the 10 pm to 6am. Most days he gets home and falls asleep by 8, however when errands and chores needs to get done while I’m at work, he will do so before going to bed. This is year 4 for us. Hang in there
I work 10 pm- 7am 40+ hours a week and I am up and out of bed by 3-4pm to do what I need to do before work that night. That being said, there are some days where I do need the extra sleep and end up sleeping the full day and only get up right before I need to leave.
The way he is talking to you is wrong and mean, and there’s no reason for him to be sleeping all day long other than the fact that he just wants to.
What it boils down to is your husband’s mental well being. If he can’t take care of himself then you both have an issue. Sounds like overworked and depressed. Most men have no idea how to recognize when they are going through something, let alone how to deal. Hopefully you guys can find a mutual ground
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Everyone justifying the fact that night shift takes a toll on the body, never fully rested, Yada Yada ya…No. No one sleeps for 12 hours. Not 1st, or 2nd shift people. He’s a father and a husband. He needs to act like it. Or find a different job. If he doesn’t want to do that then he just doesn’t want it all together. She’s not over reacting because she wants her husband to fulfill the duties he signed up for.
I agree it takes time for the body to adjust to third shift. But I do think based on your language that he may be unhappy or depressed. So I might do a check in with him on those things…
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My husband worked weekend nights (fri, sat, Sunday 12 hr shifts) and those days were HORRIBLE for us. It was ridiculously hard on his body to transition to that schedule, and then during the week he’d try to be awake during the day to spend time with us. It was a very rocky time in our relationship and I felt like a single mom most of the time with a visiting boyfriend. I’m here to tell you as long as it’s only the schedule change, it can and will get better. It takes time and patience from both of you, and your kids need to get on board with helping with what they can depending on age. But I feel you, because that time almost broke us.
This reads to me as if he is trying to get you to kick him out so he isn’t the bad guy leaving the family.
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He’s adjusting to night shift it’s rough … give him some time it can take a reallllyyy long time to adjust to working nights 
No you are not over reacting, I would put those boundaries in place now or he’ll be continuing the same issues going forward years to come if you allow It to continue. Trust me and keep voicing your needs. If rolls were reversed I bet you’ll be doing everything plus more and he’ll still find excuses to sleep. It’s clear he’s only thinking of his needs only and can’t handle being a family man rather than a self centred man! going to be sounding like a broken record if you don’t set those boundaries now
I am a single mom to 5 kids and I work graveyard shift 9 pm to 7 am. And it is 100000% difficult to get rest and function. Go easy on him. It’s not his fault he is restless. It drains the life out of you to work graveyard shift. I get home in time to get my older kids ready for school and stay up and take care of my youngest everyday. And with school out it’s even harder. I get family time is needed and the nasty comments are for sure not needed but it is definitely hard to adjust girl
No , you are not , his schedule is unacceptable for a relationship, you told him right !
Having a family means sacrifice and if he wanted to be part of the family he already would be trying without you having to ask.
Night shift is hard and leads to depression faster in my exp. and sounds just like my bipolar ass when its hitting me hard on the down side
And we’re supposed to be happy with interrupted 4 hours & handle alllll of life’s problems
Nope I worked 11-7 never once slept until 9pm. Sounds to me like he’s doing it on purpose
Y’all I work 11-7am shift and I get bitches at from my man bc I need sleep. I feel his pain right now. He would try and wake me up. There are times he’s let me sleep till 2 or 3 pm and I’d be an asshole and just want to go back to sleep. Nightshift definitely takes alot out of you. I have 2 kids and one on the way. So I’m pregnant and was going through this too. I need my sleep or shits not gonna go right for noone. Let the man sleep. He will come around I promise
My husband did the 2nd and 3rd shift most the time. Most of the time in a different state. We made the most of the moments we got together and set a goal. He would only pull those hours till he got a job in his profession that allowed more off time. While he did his shifts, I homeschooled the kids, took weekend trips and was able to really make some great memories with my boys…now grown. He eventually found a job that allowed more time for us and it all worked out beautifully! My question is this…when he took this job did you agree? Is there another job that might allow better hours? Can he ask for a different shift? I’m not saying it was easy but I literally used that time to connect with my kids and our families. The remark he made makes me believe he hates it as much as you do. Sit down and talk with him and see if he is open to looking for something with regular hours. We went through those shifts for 11 years…but we always text and set 30mins aside for us to catch up. Lol. There were several times we both fell asleep on the phone…lol. Have you thought about working? Sometimes there is an unbalanced feeling when both spouses are not contributing job wise equally . Not saying being a mom isn’t a job but a job would help you to get out, see people and some time away from mom duties. I always picked at my husband…as long as we have the things we need and when he is home he was in my bed…lol. I wouldn’t complain! He works, he provides and he doesn’t do any mischief. That is hard to find now a days. Just talk to him. Let him know that you would like to figure out a way to have more time with him and that you miss him.
That third shift is hell getting used to hopefully he’ll move to another shift once a position opens. Good luck but in the meantime just try to understand
Give his body time to adapt 6-12 weeks…He will be good to go…
Open up the bedroom door, its dinnertime?
Give him some time to adjust
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Night shift messes with your body big time!
Is he drinking energy drinks at work, i work a 10pm to 7am and if i drink an energy drink i crash in the morning and accidently sleep that long. Night shift is hard but i manage to watch my kids by myself while my husband works day shift. He is lazy.
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Sis, Night shift is a rough shift.
Mine has worked all kinds of shifts being a truck driver for 30 plus years and night security and one stretch of 9 years all night shift it is hard to adjust the clock. Even on his breaks he pretty much kept same schedule because being too far off it killed him 1st night back. You will have to adjust find stuff you like to do etc. It does get better but takes a while
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Let me be the one to say night shift is HARD it messes with your body so badly…
It actually takes longer for your body to adjust to nights I highly suggest him getting a different shift it will be the best thing for you guys
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Night shift adjustment can be hard. But I see your point of view too. Him being mostly absent in your children’s lives and being at work or in bed all the time can effect them negatively in many ways. Also, with the way he responded by saying that kicking him out is doing both of you a favor is NOT normal or acceptable even if he is super tired. At that point maybe you should fully evaluate your relationship and ask yourself if it’s worth moving forward in your relationship. It’s better that your kids see you in a loving and active relationship and not one that seems to be falling apart. They need their parents happy, not miserable.
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Night shift doesn’t excuse the unnecessary comments. There’s no excuse for that. I’ve worked nights so yes they are tough, but the just kick me out comments aren’t necessary. If working nights is an excuse for being an asshole. I’d hate to be around any of you who are saying working nights gives you a “I get to be an asshole pass”.
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Tell me about it over 5 year of that and still doing it
I work the overnight shift, get off at 6am. I sleep until 12-1pm and I love to sleep! That gives me 8-9hours to do things before going to work again. He needs to train himself & fix his internal clock. Sorry, he sounds depressed & checked out. No you are not overreacting & yes you have every right to say something to him. He is being selfish, and acts like his work schedule only effects him.
No ur not. Id be bothered also. Mine sleeps alot to… It does bother me. He is a little more active than urs but not much. So i feel ya.
But not once did u stop during this rant to say you asked him how he was doing or how stressful the job is. If youv been together 10 years and this is a new behavior theres probly a reason why. He probly feels hes busting his ass and is so tired adjusting to the stress and is probly depressed he dont see his kids bc he feels all he does is work and sleep then gets a pre load of stress befo re going to work
The fact he’s not even working a long shift but still can’t be bothered to be physically present is some bullshit.
I know dudes that work 12s and still manage to squeeze family time in.
I used to work 65 hours a week and still make time every single day, done both 2nd and 3rd shifts. Wife was and has been a stay at home mother to our 3 kids forever now. Yes I had tired days, but everyone has them.
Keep the pressure on him, if he can’t develop himself into a family man he shouldn’t have decided to make a family.
Also, the fact that he sees no issue in behaving this way and not being a part of his kids daily activities goes to show his character. If he can come out for drinks and food he can do a puzzle with his kids or even invite them into the room to sit and relax.
And to respond to all the “night shifter” woes, iv been there and done that, if you can’t function under that shift it’s time for a new job 
It’s hard to get used to night shifts. It takes awhile.
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He doesn’t care about you!
The comment be made tells me you might want to take a look at his phone but thats just me and what I’d do. Sounds like he wants out. Let him go if he doesn’t want to try and be a husband and father. He can pay child support and continue sleeping all day.
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Do you get 12 hours of sleep? If not then he doesn’t need it either. It takes time for the body to adjust to that shift but he should still be willing to compromise and spend time with his wife and kids. Give him maybe a month and if he can’t be bothered to TRY then do him that “favor” and kick him out. When I was on night shift I was lucky to get 2-3 hours of sleep before having to get up with kids and what not, what makes men any better than women? And I was pregnant. He CAN sacrifice a bit for his family, he just doesn’t WANT to.
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My boyfriend is a railroad manager/supervisor his work shifts are 24/7:365! Even when he’s home he’s still working, even when he’s trying to spend time with our 8m old daughter he’s working, even when he’s trying to enjoy a meal or shower. Suck it up butter cup, this guy could be leaving you to drink, do drugs and be with others but to me it sounds like he’s providing for his family. Maybe TALK AND COMMUNICATE with him?
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If you don’t work than you really need to hush! He’s working and providing … you take care of the home! Night shift drains you and he needs rest! Night shift is brutal!! Do YOUR part as a wife IF you don’t work! Now if you work days and him nights that’s a different story
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Have a heart. It is very hard to work all night and still try to get sleep during the day with kids being loud and waking you up every hour. A healthy REM cycle requires two hours of solid sleep JUST to REACH a REM cycle. I’ve been there. Appreciate him more and if you really don’t like the situation, then you go back to work and take his place. We have six kids. We take turns working a year on and a year off so we don’t get burnt out. He works retail and overnight stocking. I work in a high end pubs/ restaurant that closes at 2am. Put up or quit complaining. You are partners. Start acting like it if you love him.
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I work 3rd shift and it took a year and half to get used to. Constantly tired, everytime I sat down I fell asleep. Crabby all the time and all I did was work and sleep. It takes time, and alot of time!
As someone who worked thirds this was kinda normal for me as well. I was just so exhausted from not only the job but the being awake at odd hours. I always found it difficult to wake up 
I feel this, my fiance been on 3rd shift for a year today for FedEx driving truck. He will literally sleep til 3pm leaves at 5pm same for his days off except he don’t leave at 5
When my dad worked night shift it sucked for all of us but we had our time on his days off and vacation days BUT him saying all the EXTRA crap aht aht tell him if he is looking for a way out and wants to leave he don’t need permission 
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Give him time… it took me 6 months to fully adjust to night shift.
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Compromise. I flip schedules on my days off to do more stuff with the family. I also stagger my sleep schedule. The beginning of the week I got to bed at 8 and by the end of the week I go to bed at 11. That way it gives me different opportunities to interact with my family.
For me its the “throw him out and do you both a favor” 
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You’re absolutely NOT overreacting. I work 12 hours shifts and STILL don’t sleep that much. Yes, night shift can be even more draining. But 8 hour shifts and you feel the need to sleep for over 12? No. My daughter’s dad works 10 hour shifts 7pm-5am and he’s still up by noon-1 every day to be a parent to both of the kids even though only one is biologically his you couldn’t tell my son wasn’t. I don’t mean this rudely, but it sounds like yours is just looking for an excuse and that’s just sorry of him 
Let the man sleep stop being selfish
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ALARM BELLS ARE RINGING 
why don’t you kick me or and do us both a favour?
If that’s his response to being present for even an hour of the day with you or the kids then sorry but I’d replace him with someone who gave a sh!t!
Sounds like he’s avoiding you’s to me by sleeping all day and can’t wait to get out the house.
Either he’s struggling with parenting or your marriage is just at an end. And I feel it’s the latter tbh.
Very odd reaction.
Tell him to remember, he’s very replaceable at that job, he’s not replaceable to his kids.
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Sounds like he answered it for you🤷🏼♀️
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Third shift is fuckin rough. Give him a break.
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His response should be your answer
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When I was raising a newborn and a 1 year old with autism, I got on average 2 hours of sleep per night
Your husband is a selfish asshole
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My husband literally only works and sleeps: Am I overreacting?
No you’re not, I just think you need to ask him how he’s doing mentally. Whenever my fiancé worked midnights he was super depressed, it makes you a different person, zombie like. It’s tough, hang in there with him.
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Night shifts are definitely really tough and not the same kind of sleep you’d get at night xx