All the signs are there girl. His signs are loud and clear and you said it, he wants nothing to do with you and kids and Bill’s. Kick his ass to the curb.
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Sounds like you are taking care of 3 children…
Seriously, stop doing everything for someone who dosent appreciate anything you do. He is their father and can’t buy them anything? What kinda low life is he?
Honey you are already doing this all on your own… might as well get rid of the dead weight.
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No judgement but let that ship sail just unnecessary baggage get rid of him you deserve better and so do ur kids.
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Get a lawyer. Then get a divorce. Being a single parent can be easier than being a married one sometimes. This is one of them.
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Sadly you married a little boy and now will eventually have to make a decision.
Never settle for less than you deserve
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Why are you still married to him? He’s a grown up. Set him loose
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What do you need him for if you’re already doing it all? He’s only extra work for you.
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Been their and the best thing you can do is leave , start your new live with your kids and enjoy your freedom with open arms 
xxxx
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Leave him!! Odds is he’s comfortable!! I’m not taking care of a man like he’s one of my children he will eat that up and use you!
All his money and love is with his 2nd family
You seriously need not bear his weight! He is obviously lying to you about working and spending time elsewhere. It should be perfectly clear what your next step should be. Get an attorney demand full custody and child support. You are living alone already. Just a word of advice I would start writing down when he comes home, if he buys anything if even it’s small. Keep those notes because they will come in handy because we don’t remember it all when we are stressed. The biggest thing is your kids! They think this is a normal thing that dad comes and goes as he pleases and by the sounds of it has nothing to do with them. Time to put you and your children ahead of a deadbeat!
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Don’t do his laundry
Me and my husband both work full time and have a child. For the financial part. We added up the mortgage and all the bills inc the average amount we spend on food etc. Every mth we each put the same amount into a joint account and that takes care of all our bills and then the money we have left in our own accounts is our own
Hate to say this but it’ll only get worse. You’ll probably find he’s cheating / seeing prostitutes too. Honestly get out while you can xx
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If you are carrying the load why is he there? What is he needed for? Tell him to stay at work. Don’t come back
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No honey you don’t have to. You choose to.
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Lady why do you need another weight pulling you down. Cut him loose and find someone that helps you and not hold you back from being happy
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I’m going through the same only thing he helps with nothing I buy groceries I pay the rent buy the kids what they need I feel u in so many ways I’m so depressed I tell him how I feel n he does nothing to try to help at this point I just want him gone I can do bad by myself
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Talk to him first. Tell him everything you want to say and want him to do. If he didn’t comply and continue his wrong doing then its time to get rid of him. Have a divorce. Love your self. He is not worth anything and anyone.
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I’m just gonna say this, it’s easier to be a single mom without a parasitic husband to deal with. You will find more peace alone. Been there, done that.
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You proved you can do it on your own so Sod him off one less for you to bother about good luck
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Kick his ass out… the fuggg has time for that shet…
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You deserve a man who will love and help you in life. Your kids are watching you and will think this is normal. Kick him out and do it alone until you find a man that can be who you need.
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What do you want or need him around for. He knows he can use and neglect you because you let him. Get a divorce and make him pay support then at least your getting some kind of help at least. Don’t waste what life you have left on a loser!
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Oh sweetheart you have all the answers… you just have make all the right moves now. You are damaging yourself as well as your children by staying. You and your babies deserve better heck you can do bad all by yourself. I’ll be praying for you. God bless you and your precious children.
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You don’t have a husband, you have a grown child who can be tossed on his ass. Why deal with the extra stress? You obviously can do it, not that you should have to especially having a “husband”.
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Leave his ass. You may not think you can make it on your own but you basically are on your own now. Took me 20 years to realize that before I finally left. Hope you waste that much time on someone who doesn’t deserve you.
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If he’s not contributing then why not LET THAT BOY GO?! If he’s legit only making it harder than he’s no PARTER! Partners are 50/50 or at the very least close! Get away from that loser pronto!!!
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Your life will be so much better without the mental, physical and financial stress that POS puts on you. The court will force him to support his kids. It might grow him up. Most importantly, you should not be allowing your children to see two very bad examples of responsible parenting. He is abusive and you are allowing it. Quit being his doormat.
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Leave him honestly if he makes you feel depressed take your kids and leave and become the amazing women you wanna be
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Honestly it sounds like it’s time to leave. You don’t need that third child to take care of. I’d start looking for my own place or kick his self out. But before all else I’d speak with a lawyer to see what all your options are.
Why are you still married to him? Marriage is about partnership, so if you’re doing it all by yourself why don’t you leave him no good will ever come from such situation.
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Well looks like you don’t need him if you’re doing all of that by yourself why do you need him kick his ass to the curb you don’t need to take care of him let him take care of him so he doesn’t seem to have any respect for you or care for you help him pack his bags and kick his ass out
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Divorce him. Be Like Henny Penny. If you can do it All By Yourself, then BE By Yourself. Your children see how you are treated. When they grow up, they’ll think its acceptable to treat their spouse that way as Men. Women will think its acceptable behavior from their Husband. Because Mom Did. Break the pattern NOW.
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Girl… U don’t have to take care of him … He’s a grown ass man !!! Drop him…and take care of you and your children. Get him for child support !!!
He’s at work all day, doesn’t interact with the kids, and doesn’t help around the house but you’re still working and paying bills? He gotta go. There’s no need of his presence except making everyone else miserable.
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Leave him…you don’t have to live like this!! Trust me from experience almost similar to this…it won’t get better!!
I was in the same situation. Got my nursing degree so I could be independent financially. Spoke with every attorney I did not want him to have (once you speak with them he cannot be represented by them) and found a place to move to. Got used furniture and a used vehicle in my name. Then told him I was filing for divorce and left the very same day. Had already moved my clothes and everything I needed. He never even noticed. Left him what he needed to function and survive. Never went back! That was 20 years ago and he is still alone and miserable.
Kick his loser ass out! Waste of time and energy.
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Divorced life is hard but way better. The picture is usually painted. Try some counseling.and expressing your needs better. Good luck.
Stop doubting yourself sis, you are scared to do it alone. Hello you are doing it alone. You will find much peace within yourself your children and your home if you just let the toxicity go. Take time to heal and you will feel very empowered. Sending prayers!!!
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No judgement at all! I actually went through something sorta similar… not that specifically but I ended up taking a different road.
I left for eh very sale reasons if I’m going to be acting like a single parent then I might as well be one and I did it just fine
Divorse him, you already are taking care of him, but document everything you said first to use against him in court.
You have the strength to leave. You’re already doing it on your own!!
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Take the kids and go.
Sounds like he won’t miss you and vice versa. Separate and Leave before he ruins all your hard work. Don’t think he can’t and won’t. I always say If I’m going to ruin my life, I’m doing it all by myself. I’ve already been taken down financially while in school, working FT and raising 2 babies. All it takes is one addiction to ruin a whole family. Get out while you can.
I ask a male coworker why some men treat women so badly. He told me it’s because WE ALLOW IT! And that woke me up. It’s your marriage too and you shouldn’t be unhappy in your marriage. If you gotta do it all alone, be alone. Life is too short to be unhappy. I stayed in my bad marriage because it became a routine and I hate new things. But I finally realized not just that I deserved better but my kids deserved better as well. You will eventually get into new routines and be happier on your own.
Just leave . Easier said then done but trust me I’m 8 years out and best 8 years ever .
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Kick his ass to the curve. It won’t be easy at first, but the end results will be great.
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Throw him out ,believe me you’ll be happier in the long run
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I read, posts on this thread, but not “comment.” Young Lady; your marriage IS a Carbon Copy of my marriage! Long divorced now though. I did many of the “exact things” you are now doing! I did the college detail and my grades were “tops.” He’d called me “stupid/dumb” even when my Instructors told him how “smart I was!” People can give you advice BUT you have to Take the step (s) yourself. Stay or Go. As for me; “one day I’d HAD enough and Walked–not looking back.” Kids (son and daughter) are grown with families. To this day; both tell me–"Mom, the best thing you (me) done was divorcing Dad. " You have to “make your Choice.” Good luck, young Lady.
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Kick his ass to the curb
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Your doing it all by yourself hun so u may aswell do it without him don’t let him take advantage of your good nature hun move on he’s not worth stressing over he seems like he got no respect for you x
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Drop his deadbeat ass to the curb and be done! Stop doing ANYTHING for him. He is doing nothing for you or your kids. You need him like a root canal.
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Leave him, your already taking care of the kids & buying groceries & necessities. Sounds alot like your making it on your on anyway. Sorry your going through this.
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Leave… you can do bad alone…
I am a widow… I miss him… I was afraid too be alone… didn’t think I could make it… but look hun… you are a hard working mom…
Trust me … you can do it without him…
Your also lucky too have family like your mom n dad…
I think you will be happy single…
I also think your husband will open up n tell u why he is so distant with you n your kids…
I bet money … if u file for a divorce he will open his eyes…
U can have paper drawn … n… not have too go threw the divorce…
But if u file… n he says … that is what he been wanting … then … boom… painful… But, freedom n happiness n peace of mind is everything…
File… your get the truth n answer u need from him…
Best of luck…
Prayers …
You’re pretty much describing the the daily and most normal life of an Algerian woman
And the worst thing is the society makes us believe that is the right way to live and there’s no options
Ps women can’t just get divorced around here and usually they have 4 children or more and forced to live with her husband’s parents and take care of them two
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Oh hun you’re already doing it alone, kick him out you don’t need negative energy in your life or around your children.
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Throw him out…make sure you file for child support and daycare costs!
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I don’t see any reason to keep him.
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No judging here, but I’m gonna be straight forward with you. It’s time to either kick him to the curb, or take your kids and yourself, and set up shop somewhere else without him. You shouldn’t have to be doing everything on your own.
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U have ur answers . see if u can get the grandparents to take the kids for a few days tell them u and him have to have a serious talk about your future . then wait for his sorry ass to get home pack all his clothes . tell him he has a choice become a parent and a husband or leave tell him this shit needs to stop or u want a divorce .
I pack my husbands clothes took them to his parents house and lefted them on their porch. He was there told him he lives here now and im done. I left for awhile to stay with friends to think. My situation was different from yours but my ex husband was the same as yours no partnership at all. He paid the bills but he had nothing to do with the kids except make them. We had 4 together and i was raising them alone. Good luck to u.
Toss him out with the trash.
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Sounds like he’s got another woman and he’s probably keeping her up. Dump his ass!
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Been there done that. Get out and feel the FREEDOM!
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You are doing everything by yourself why are you taking care of an inconsiderate grown man? He is an energy vampire he won’t stop untill you drop. Sending packing 
.
Hope you know what you have to do to make yourself smile.
Why are you still with him? I’m sure you love him but he does nothing to help you at all. He doesn’t give you money? Im sorry I don’t get it.
I’ve been there.
Throw him out. You’ll probably have a hard time getting rid of him. Because no one else will take care of him. They always try to come back. As myself, you’re doing it all. You don’t need him. Take care of you & the kids. That’s all that matters! You’ll have less of a headache!
You know what to do. I think you just need to hear it.
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Get rid what’s the point of carrying dead weight along in life with you ??? What good is he ? Just a whole heap of junk. Get rid free yourself and the kids and be happy!!! U don’t wanna be turning 60 and going darn I should of left 30yrs back!!
Not every man wants to be a husband or a parent. Just because he gave you a child does not make him a dad. My ex was exactly like this except for the bills. He paid the bills and did nothing else, at all. He literally would say “no one speak to me for at least and hour when I come home from work’’- like after an hour who wants to talk to you anyways? So as time went on the kids didn’t even bother talking to him about anything and how sad it was to see children be neglected by their father. I did him a favor by throwing him out after 18 years of hoping he would change and I’m sad that I wasted all those years. The children know what’s going on. Trust me, they know and feel more than we give them credit for and you’re all better off without him. It’d be so sad for them to grow up feeling neglected by him and to feel like they had to constantly beg for his attention. You’re already doing it all girl, might as well lose the dead weight. Trust me… my kids are adults now and they tell me that they’re grateful to me for all I’ve done for them and that I raised them all by myself and they have good memories of me being both mom and dad. I found a man after who loves my children as much as his own and they think of him as a father figure but had I not met him, I would never put them through being ignored by anyone ever again.
He will never change, I promise. Get out as fast as you can. Get a good lawyer, stay strong, fight for your kids and don’t look back.
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Change the locks. You’ll be happier alone.
There’s no need to judge you. I do have to say if you take care of everything he I’d just extra baggage and no help why keep him around? You are doing it with no help so do it without his dead ass weight. It is so much easy without him depressing you. It will still be hard but at least you know you can.
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Girl, it’s time to get a lawyer and draw up some paperwork for him to sign. 
Your already doing it yourself. So do it yourself and save the stress of him and extra money you spend on food for him. Your bills will go down. Your stress level will drop.
Its hard. But your a smart woman. You already know the answer you just need to do it.
If you are unhappy and doing everything yourself, why are you staying?
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Leave him girl… clearly you acan do shit on your own…this is supposed to be a relationship…a partnership…the fact that you have told him how you feel and he doesn’t change means he don’t care…leave!
Ditch him.Its obvious he doesn’t care.
Ya ne. So we can at least have a husband. 
. Gal you know what to do. Don’t ask. Do
You have 3 kids! The eldest sounds like a narcissistic cheater. Run!
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I went through the same, better off being single 
Leave him,hes selfish
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I think it’s time for a divorce. You deserve better!
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Why are you still with him.
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Your already doing it all by yourself. Lose the 3rd child and you’ll be much happier
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What I can suggest to anyone going through this. If you have financial means to leave then get out!!! The mental trauma he puts on you is not worth a lifetime of it. Especially if he’s not offering anything to the relationship. It’s will be one less thing for you to take care of too. You are at point where you either need to accept he is basically another child to take care of for the rest of your life and be unhappy but you will have a picturesque family that lives together. Or you can choose to rightfully take back your life and do whatever you want with it. Think how happy you’ll be after you kiddos are taken care of and sleeping, and its just you who now needs to be taken care of. You can be the one in charge. If you want to wear no makeup and drink wine all night you can. If you don’t want to clean there will be no husband to nag you, whilst he does nothing. I sometimes wish us women would pick a date and leave all these toxic men at once and never look back!!! Some of them won’t and will never change. Try leaving for a few months… if he doesn’t fight like hell and improve his lifestyle… there is your answer.
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You’re dealing with a narcissist. Best thing to do is make a plan and work the plan. Decide whether you keep the place or find yourself & kids a new one. Take the advice that others here have given. You & your kids will be much better off than with that user. Get a lawyer, as divorce gets complicated when kids are in the mix. You can do this! As part of your plan, seek out a support network.
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You know the answer yourself deep inside. You know this is wrong. You know you should leave. You are already doing everything yourself and you need him for NOTHING.
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He’s probably not working as much as you think he is. Otherwise he wouldn’t be broke. He’s probably staying up drinking and messing around with other girls. You can’t win in that situation. He doesn’t care about you and nothing is gonna change. Get an attorney and take everything he has.
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I wish I could tell you things will get better, but unless you make changes yourself, you will stay stuck in this awful situation. The only way he will change is if he decides to do it for his own reasons. That doesn’t sound likely. You know in your heart what you need to do. Now you have to make your plans and do it. It is not easy, but you and your babies will be healthier and happier. Please, for your sake and theirs, get to work on your plan. Gather your resources, emotional, physical, and financial. Reach out quietly to family, friends, community who are willing and able to help. You deserve a peaceful, healthy life. You are not alone. You are stronger than you know.
If your doing it all by yourself, you might as well be by yourself.
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You know what you need to do. Believe me I know how you feel…like you don’t even have the energy to do it, to leave him or put him out. But once you do you will know a sense of peace and freedom like never before. Once you stop worrying about where he is, what he is, or in your case, is NOT doing, or who he is doing it with you and your kids will be so much better off.
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You have to take all your courage together and pack up. You deserve much better than this. Don’t be afraid off leaving him. Been there same situation. Didn’t won’t to leave because I was afraid of doing it al by myself and didn’t wanted to separate the kids from their father. Held it together for 17 years and then I just crumbled…I have turned the page and yes it is difficult sometimes and yes I have to do it all by myself still and yes I was scared but now 3 years later me and my kids are so much happier. Wish I’ve did it 15 years earlier
Think you know the answer ditch him good and proper.
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What difference does it make if you get rid of him, since he is only coming home for you to take care of. Don’t spend your life unhappy. Get rid of him- you are already doing everything yourself. If you get rid of him, it will be one less person to feed, do their laundry, pick up after, etc. You are already living and doing what you would if you were single. Just take care of yourself and your children, and let him fen for himself!
What’s there to question?? Are you reading this to yourself??
Nothing there to stay for
Leave!! 1000% leave. If you’ve tried talking to him and he won’t try then leave. You’re basically a single parent as it is.
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My grand daughter is in your same position. She has a Bachelors degree, working towards her Masters, works full time, has a 2 yr old, But, But, her husband works full time also, studies college also, and together, the whole family helps with caring with their daughter. If you are alone in all this, just say, it’s too much for you and leave sweetie. There’s always help and love out there. Stand strong, remember you are stronger than you think. Latinas, are fierce, and very protective of their children. Wish you the best mama.
You can’t change a person. You need to leave if they are mot behaving as you need him to.