My Husband Texts Another Woman Throughout the Day: Advice?

QUESTION:

"Anyone else’s significant other spend all day every day literally texting another woman?

They talk about our relationship, hers, and I don’t know what else. He stops talking to me when she texts him, even when we’re in the middle of a conversation.

It makes me mad that he drops me like that. I guess she used to be someone he pursued romantically, and he recently gave her his number."

RELATED QUESTION: My husband has been texting some a woman until midnight: Thoughts?

TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):

“Um, what… I’m sorry but why are you still with him? Men don’t just text women like that and divulge their lives… that’s an entanglement right there.”

“Look up the phrase ‘emotional affair’ and see if it fits what he is doing. Affairs don’t have to be physical to damage a marriage.”

“Disrespectful, inappropriate, unacceptable. He should have the respect for you to not do that.”

“He’s seeing how much he can get away with in front of you… so later he can feel like he isn’t doing anything wrong if “you really knew about it the whole time” Been there, done this! Wasted 5 years of my life. Almost lost everything!”

“My husband and I are working past this right now. We are in counseling for his addiction to other women. It’s difficult, but unless he is willing to put in the work, nothing will help. We have dealt with it for years. It took me kicking him out, making him tell the kids why he was leaving and coming clean with the woman’s husband to get there. Just please don’t make the mistake I did and think it was anything you did or didn’t do!!!”

“Instead of asking this group what you should do about your significant others unfaithfulness and blatant disregard for you and your feelings… you should be asking yourself why you’re still there.”

“Yeah, that is not ok. Definitely a red flag. I’d ask him to stop communicating with her and if he’s not willing to cut contact with her, I’d suggest taking a hard look at your relationship and if it’s a healthy one for you to be in.”

“How many more signs do you need? I’m not one to always jump and say someone is cheating. But hun, this is pretty obvious.”

“He would drop you in a heartbeat for this other girl as he proves while he ignores you for her… even though you’re standing right in front of him. You are less of a priority than this other person in his life or else he wouldn’t disrespect you that way. There’s a strong chance they are already cheating too, just saying.”

“I have s ton of male friends, and some are married. I MAKE IT A POINT to be the wife’s friend! And even have a group chat. Why I never want any to feel uncomfortable. I make clear boundaries. I would not be happy with my husband talking to a female without me knowing who she is. The wife comes first ALWAYS!”

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125 Likes

Why would you even tolerate this tell him to block her or he must leave !!

2 Likes

He needs to stop now. That’s so disrespectful and inappropriate.

5 Likes

Don’t be tolerating that crap at all. My man would be straight out on his ass!

1 Like

Disrespectful, inappropriate, unacceptable. He should have the respect for you to not do that.

11 Likes

Definitely not ok if he’s texting another female he has no respect for you or his marriage and if he’s dropping you for someone else either something happened or something is about to happen he’s straight cheating just by texting and more is about to go down I’d be getting on that mf just saying

4 Likes

Nooo not okay! :pleading_face: I’m going through something similar. It’s disrespectful, unacceptable, and not appropriate. However I understand it being difficult to let go if he’s unwilling to change.

1 Like

Oh hell no. I’d tell him to pack his shit :woman_shrugging:t2:

As someone that went through it… dont tolerate it… if he cant be open with you about it fully and Include you then bye… it was another woman a few times…

Smack him right upside the head :boom:

3 Likes

This never ends up well. Confront him now & if he doesn’t respect you enough to stop talking to her or understand why you’re not okay with it, then move on. You deserve better!

3 Likes

That’s disrespectful!

1 Like

Hhhhhheeeeeelllllllllllll no. I would castrate my husband if he did this. No no no no

3 Likes

Do It Back And I Bet You He’ll Feel It

8 Likes

So my thought is: why aren’t you discussing this with him? You’re both adults, I’d assume. So you should be sitting down like adults and airing out your thoughts, feelings, and needs. Let him talk to. Maybe there’s a reason for his behavior. Then seek marriage counseling if you decide to stay together. Otherwise, walk away.

There is a difference between having a friend of the opposite sex and talking to someone of the opposite sex. My best friend is man and my mans bestfriend is a female. We don’t keep up with eachothers conversations and respect eachothers privacy. But that doesn’t sound like a best friend, sounds like he might be getting interested

Hes emotionally cheating on u…I’ve been in your shoes… then it turned into romantically cheating

3 Likes

He’s trash dude. Take that shit to the road man.

Ignoring you or ending conversations with you is the only problem I see. Our significant others do not belong to us and are allowed friends of their own of either sex. Before anyone gets on me, I’m bi so does that mean I can’t have any friends? Just talk to him. Communicate, make sure the trust is still there.

4 Likes

Nooope especially since he tried pursuing a relationship with her at one point

Mine done it and I finally filed for divorce. He denied speaking with her when I would ask and one night he decided to say he couldn’t lie to me anymore that he had been talking to her and I told him to get out of this house.

Time for you to move on at a run !!

BYE. thats all I can say.

Your spouse should not be giving someone else his full divided attention. You can have friends of the opposite sex but talking to them all the time and many times throughout the day is a no go.

Run now it isn’t going to be the last time this happens

1 Like

Oh HELL no ! Red flags are screaming at you ! Don’t ignore them

Hell to the no! The only female that deserves his time and attention is you!

1 Like

Ya… bout that. I’d be single :sweat_smile:

Leave him now! He is horrible and so is she!

1 Like

Nope. Zero tolerance. Been through the whole talking to other women Several times with my SO. I would voice you’re feelings and let him know it’s on him if he chooses to put talking to her ahead of you and your guys relationship. Sadly if you don’t stand your ground, if there is no real consequence hell just keep doing it

2 Likes

Has he thought about “the shoe on the other foot”? How would he feel if you were the one doing the texting? You shouldn’t have to be in a competition with another woman for your mans attention. I would lay some rules down and let him know that if he keeps texting her and talking about YOUR relationship with HER instead of talking about it with you - then he will have all the time in the world to text her while he’s single. You’re worth more than that <3

He’s seeing how much he can get away with in front of you… so later he can feel like he isn’t doing anything wrong if “you really knew about it the whole time” Been there… Done this!

Wasted 5 years of my life. Almost lost everything!

4 Likes

DO NOT TOLERATE IT!!! Please girl sit his ass down and talk to him ASAP. It’s only gonna get worse and turn into more

Fuck that leave him if he refuses to stop
That is how cheating starts.

Oh absolutely fucking not!

Question is why are you tolerating this?
Know your worth.

6 Likes

Mine does the same :face_with_raised_eyebrow: it’s so disrespectful

2 Likes

Look up the phrase “emotional affair” and see if it fits what he is doing. Affairs don’t have to be physical to damage a marriage.

15 Likes

Yeah, that is not ok.
Definitely a red flag. I’d ask him to stop communicating with her and if he’s not willing to cut contactwith her, id suggest taking a hard look at your relationship and if its a healthy one for you to be in.

4 Likes

I mean, my husband texts his boss who is a female.
But we also go to parties over her house and we have a mutual respect for each other so🤷🏼‍♀️
But they talk all the time.

2 Likes

The shit some women put up with blows my mind.

Um what…I’m sorry but why are you still with him? Men don’t just text women like that and divulge their lives…that’s an entanglement right there :roll_eyes:

30 Likes

Throw the whole dude out.

10 Likes

So you’re ok with your husband cheating right in front of you? Cool.

4 Likes

He’s has NO respect for you! That’s disgusting!

3 Likes

Instead of asking this group what you should do about your significant others unfaithfulness and blatant disregard for you and your feelings… you should be asking yourself why you’re still there.

4 Likes

He will keep doing what you allow him to. Your not doing anything to stop it, and if hes showing you right to your face that he doesnt respect or value your relationship, why are you still with him? Relationships are 100/100 not give effort here and there… if there are no consequences to his behavior, why would he stop what hes doing?

3 Likes

Disrespectful and emotionally cheating in my opinion.

4 Likes

Whos gonna tell her?
:joy::joy:

5 Likes

you have become the extra…time to cut your loss…he is using you…

3 Likes

Put your foot down. Don’t compete for his time and love. Leave.

Fuck that noise. I would raise hell if I found out my husband chose to reconnect with an old flame.

Honey your husband has ZERO respect for you and is cheating in front of your face. Some might say counseling. I say leave his sorry ass. It’s only going to go downhill from here. Whoever this other woman is OBVIOUSLY more important than you if he’s dropping conversations with you to speak to her. It’s time to move on hun. :woman_shrugging:t4:

Sydney Holecek omg please read this😩

Girl, you need to throw the whole man out!
Do not question your worth. He clearly views you as second option and you aren’t! He is blantly “cheating” in your face and because you are “ok” with it he is gonna do it no matter what!

3 Likes

Why are you still with him? :woman_shrugging:

Fuck that. Honestly if you want to stay discuss some boundaries. He’s clearly not giving a damn about your feelings.

Oh helllllll no that is not okay.

My husband said nope that mans cheating.

I don’t make ultimatums with my husband and he has plenty of female friends from the military and high school and I always come first.

1 Like

Tell him to choose texting with her or a relationship with you.

Sounds like he’s with her now.

3 Likes

Time for him to be your ex husband

1 Like

And you’re sticking around whyyyyy?

2 Likes

Throw the whole man out and take his bank account

1 Like

It’s emotional cheating. Ask him to stop. If he continues, file for a divorce.

2 Likes

Cheating, if he hasn’t he will. Put a stop to it now

3 Likes

Thats why I’m going through a separation now! My husband started texting God only knows who. Texting leads to meeting and meeting leads to…Sorry to be blunt. Put a stop to it now. Or you could end up starting over 23.5 years later.

1 Like

That’s called an affair.

3 Likes

Nope, I d tell him to pack his bags

Time to leave and not look back. How can anyone put up with that.

Tell him to pack his bags and go over there to that woman’s house

Yeah, I’d put an end to that immediately. Definitely not appropriate, and leading down a slippery slope

1 Like

Hit the road Jack!! Once a cheater always a cheater.

He’s clearly cheating or on the way to it I would give him an ultimatum stop talking to her or you leave

So he is having an affair and you have not kicked him out?

2 Likes

I would leave him, if he really honestly cared for you he wouldn’t do that. My ex did this same thing and then he started doing pics, save yourself the heartache and leave him.

So I’m all for guys and gals being able to be platonic friends. My bestie in the whole world is a dude. But that’s just some bullshit right there. I wouldn’t even put up with that shit with his guy friends

In the words of the rapper 69 " Are you dumb, Stupid or dumb! Huh?:joy::joy::joy::joy::joy:

3 Likes

I mean you really gotta ask? That’s a her or me situation… Or better yet, tell him to go to her…

1 Like

Completely disrespectful! He is cheating ! Doesn’t matter if it’s not physically but emotionally is the same thing ! Throw the whole man out !!

3 Likes

Extremely disrespectful to you, even if he doesn’t have inappropriate intentions. How would he feel if the tables were turned?

1 Like

Fuck that let her have him apperantly there’s something there that you are not part of …mmhmm

Honestly, I could understand if it was say a close friend and they’ve been friends for years, blah blah blah and whatnot, were all adults here, let’s have a mutual respect for our SO’s that they can have whoever as friends, men or women, but this just sounds like it crosses the line. He sounds like a total cheater AND douchebag that he’d put anyone other than his own WIFE first.

1 Like

My therapist once said thats its disrespectful to your spouse, to speak on your relationship, with someone of the opposite sex.

4 Likes

How many more signs do you need? I’m not one to always jump and say someone is cheating. But hun, this is pretty obvious.

4 Likes

Woooooow seriously??

1 Like

Id punch him in his face

2 Likes

He is disrespecting you! What he is doing is definitely not okay, and I’m so sorry this is happening to you…

1 Like

Nope :-1:t2: That’s taking it too far.

I would have and have had a serious problem with this
I do not feel this is healthy or appropriate.
I would and have been jealous and untrusting.
I would not want to be in a relationship or marriage with someone that felt this type of behavior is acceptable

2 Likes

Looks like he traded you for her and she is his emotional connection. Marriage is an emotional Union. I wouldn’t stand for that.

2 Likes

He would drop you in a heartbeat for this other girl as he proves while he ignores you for her… even though you’re standing right in front of him. You are less of a priority than this other person in his life or else he wouldn’t disrespect you that way. There’s a strong chance they are already cheating too, just saying.

3 Likes

Run. You deserve to be treated with love and respect. Don’t settle for less than you deserve. Why would you want to stay with someone who treats you like a doormat?

3 Likes

SMASH THE MOTHERFUCKING PHONE!!! Sooooo not cool!!!

Ko Judelish e Skye … :eyes:

1 Like

That’s not positive. I’m not sure why anyone needs to chat and text throughout the day to someone if they have a SO especially if they used to have a thing. If you aren’t comfortable with it and he ignores you and continues not good. If you ask to see texts and he says no or freaks out it’s not good. This is a recipe for disaster or cheating. You are supposed to be the priority and if you aren’t and he’s cool making you feel like you aren’t then you need to get out. He’s cheating emotionally if not more. Sorry but it’s all not good and he’s disrespectful to you and your relationship.

1 Like

I will be texting that hoe right the way ! Also I will let him know that I’m against it completely… that’s completely disrespectful to you and your family .

Clearly your much more calm than me. I would have broken that phone minute he ignored me while I was talking. Confronted him heck I would have even punched him and kicked him out

4 Likes

From personal experience… which was the exact same senario… RED FLAGS ALLL OVER THIS!

1 Like

Umm this is a joke right???