You aren’t going to change him. Give him a taste of his own medicine
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Oh man. He’s being sooo shady. Throw the whole damn man away and start over!!
It’s him he’s playing you don’t put up with that
Just leave. There’s no reason you should put up with anything like that…if you expressed your feelings and are met with blow ups…it’s time to walk away. He sounds like a narcissist and you should walk away now. He needs people in his life who stroke is ego. You will never “be enough”. You’ll always be one of many.
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First of all you come first not that other woman that’s called cheating
You need to leave with tour self respect
If his best friends was a guy and they were really close and he spends a lot of time with him would you be asking your husband to treat you like he treats his best friend?
So maybe that’s a part of why he thinks you do not trust that his friendship with her isn’t just friendship, he thinks you’re jealous because she’s a woman. And maybe you are and maybe you should be worried because of his inappropriate behavior with other women 
idk.
But if you want to make things better with him stop comparing his relationship with the people he is close to, to your relationship with him. He can be close to his Mom, his sister, his coworkers etc. how he treats them has nothing to do with your relationship. Make it about the two of you and leave others out of it and tell him you want to spend more time with him, you want to be closer. Good Luck.
Love yourself more. If you don’t value yourself and set boundaries he will continue to disrespect you
I hope he leaves you. Your relationship is toxic that much is clear
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This will never change… end it
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Simple: hes fallen out of love, making you feel guilty for his behavior. Betrayal of the body is one thing…but betrayal of the mind is devastating…face it …it will not get better only worst…
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Find you a male bestie.
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If you have to beg for a mans attention, he doesn’t deserve yours. Get out of that situation.
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Repeat after me……”WHAT I ALLOW IS WHAT WILL CONTINUE!” You need to set some better boundaries for yourself and then people can treat you accordingly or they can bounce! He treats his best friend better because he obviously knows she wouldn’t tolerate him being out of line to her. Put your foot down and stop allowing him to mistreat you. People put up with disrespect and cheating just to hold on to a piece of shit that will do it over and over because they don’t want to be alone. Pfftttt……I’d rather be alone than allow somebody to treat me like crap.
You lost me at he was ON dating apps. Leave him
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Yeah just from the first sentence hes 100% cheating on you and thats not just his best friend. Leave his stupid ass.
I agree with Kathleen
I think you have already lost him. You just blew over that he has been on dating apps and he is married. He is shopping around and putting himself out there. His behavior with these women is wholly and completely inappropriate for a married man. I think when he finds something he perceives as better he is going to leave.
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DIVORCE THE BACKSTABBING CHEATER!
Seriously girl, don’t you have any self respect? You deserve to be with someone who won’t give you a reason to question their motives and who will treat you like a queen. You may love him but if the feeling isn’t reciprocated then what’s the point of staying?
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I would pack his stuff.
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Walk away and if he really wants to be with you then he will prove it to you!!
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Oh honey I’m sorry but he is cheating on you 
been there before and seen it to many times with others…
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Actions speak louder than words ever will. He is actively looking for someone else, cut ur loses and find someone worthy of ur time and attention
You need to introduce your man to the chancla, followed by the toaster thrust, with a left hook finale, y’all women these days are sofT
First of all it’s not your fault and it’s not you! You’re worthy!
His mind is already gone, he’s interested in other woman. Not even considering how much it hurts you. He’s a backstabbing liar and no amount of excuses justify that. Cheating isn’t just physical imo it’s also mental and in spiritual level.
Love yourself because you deserve it and either seek counseling as a desperate last attempt or leave. Have him leave, find peace.
It will not be easy but your heart and mind will thank you.
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You cannot change him and from how you’ve described your feelings towards him it doesn’t seem like you will be leaving either. So you need to be asking yourself if you can bear years of feeling this way and how you plan on doing it. Clearly if you keep pushing the issue him leaving you in turn is highly likely and no matter what you will be the one hurting.
Just do yourself a favor and leave hun. No use in trying to beat him at his own game nor beg and plead because neither outcome will be in your favor.
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He’s definitely testing the water and putting it back on you
- that’s not honoring you 2) if you have to ask him to choose you, its not worth it 3) how it is now is how it will be. Value yourself.
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Stop doing for him! Start living YOUR LIFE! don’t text him dont call him. Find something to do even if it is sitting in your car at a beach crying! You will get stronger and realize your worth let him be! I’ve done that and made it very clear I will not allow myself to be treated any way other than what I deserve so if you aren’t on that level Boi Bye!
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I read less than half of it and already know IT’S TIME TA GO SISTER. You can find better.
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That’s your problem, you love him too much and you are letting him treat you like shit. He’s doing what you are allowing him to do cause you don’t wanna lose him. So he knows he can do whatever the f he wants to, and you gonna take it.
He is not the one for you. Pray and ask God to direct your steps. His actions are showing you what he wants.
Tell Him : You just lost the Best Thing You Have EVER had in Your Life…
I did it 27yrs ago, He started flirting, then kissing, then Oral and GOOD BYE…
Save Yourself, You can’t move forward if Your CONSTANTLY wondering What’s He doing? 
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You already know the answer, quite bluntly if they have to hide the conversation there’s a reason, and if he’s treating them better it’s bc sorry to say that’s where his heart is.
If he truly loves you he wouldn’t be doing this to you or making it out to be your fault. Leave now, it won’t change and next time he will be sleeping with her Been there, done that. Happy now that I’m divorced.
You lost me after “flirting with other woman on dating apps”
Get rid off him. He’s obviously not into you. The one will be for you only 
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If they are not already in a relationship it’s on the way.
He obviously doesn’t respect and love you like a husband should. It is time to move on. He should be putting you on a pedestal and showing you off not talking to other people badly about you. He doesn’t love you time to close that chapter.
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Throw the whole man away and get a new one.
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If you have to use the words, " how do I MAKE him spend time with me", then it’s already a loss. You need to put yourself first in this situation. There’s a man out there waiting to WANT to spend time with you, without being asked to. I know you said you love him but he obviously doesn’t love you the same way. Think about that.
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He’s testing you, girly! Don’t let him do this to you… It’ll only get worse. THROW HIM AWAY!!
He’s in love with his best friend. Move on.
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Sounds like a narcissist to me. He does something wrong and makes you look like the bad person. Girl there’s better out there, you may love him but really are you with him because you love him or because that’s your comfort?
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you arent ready to hear it, but ill say it anyway. you deserve better, and there is better out there. just pull that band aid off and walk away. why would he treat you any better, when he doesnt have to??? there arent any real consequences to his actions. he literally gets to have his cake and eat it too. if you dont treat yourself with respect how can you possibly expect him to treat you with respect. he already has broken your trust, and damaged your self-esteem. time to move on
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He sounds like a Narcissist, he’s gaslighting you and using triangulation to control you.
Get rid of him, he’ll never change.
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He has narcissistic traits. RUN. AWAY.
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Run. Run fast and far
Tell him to go to therapy and get his life together. Or leave 
Lose him! There’s a reason he blows up when you tell him how you feel. And if he’s telling her lies to make you look bad, he’s playing both of you he’s eventually going to play the victim card get in really good with her and he will be gone
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If he loves u he will never be treating u this way …
He is the one doing u wrong and bad talking u behind your back that is like u are living with ur Enemy…
Have some self Respect an leave…
I will not say counseling once tgere is another woman is involve he will continue to do wat he is doing …
To build that trust back he has to be 100% truthful …
Some men may change there number an store back that outside woman number under a male name so how will u know if he will be truthful unless u catch textin or calling her back its hard alott to think about
So u forever have to be worrying
He is showing to much interest into this other woman an if they are meeting behind ur back then what are u doing staying with him…
Can imagine all the dirty things he tells her about u…
He is having his cake an eating all of it…
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Show him the door.You will find someone better.
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Sounds like he is in love with the best friend. He probably hasn’t told her yet, he might be scared of rejection. Seems he isn’t happy in your marriage anymore though either and that’s why he’s flirting with randoms on apps. He’s not ready to call it quits with you because he isn’t sure what’s going to happen… Let him go. Don’t be his place holder. You don’t compete for affection from someone who truly loves you.
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You can’t make him want to spend more time with you or anything else. I’m sorry.
I have been in this same situation and I will tell you now that either they are together or will be soon. Leave now it won’t get better
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Fuck that dude. Drop his ass.
Leave now! Yes it will hurt but just for a bit and then you will look back and wonder why you even were with him! I know easier said then done but if you and I am sure you can you will be better for it❤️
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Look up the term Narcissist…
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Ummm yea he is most likely in love with the besty and waiting for his shot. But either way your a third wheel, it isnt going to last take ur chance and leave now before you end up with kids to this narcissist.
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Are you kidding me? Why are you letting someone treat you like shit?!? Find your own best “friend” to talk to whether it be texting or on a site. This POS deserves a taste of his own medicine.
Have a man eating lesbian lawyer serve his with divorce papers. Sure to get his attention and if he does not come to realization then you are two steps ahead in your new life.
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There more than friends darlin
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You’ve already lost him. I’m sorry.
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If you’re having to fight for his attention and affection, he’s not the one.
If a persons wants to be with you and spend time with you, they will make it happen. You can’t force someone to do something they don’t want to do.
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You’ve already lost him. If he wanted to spend time with you he would. Move on
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It would be stupid for you to stay. Unless you’re ok with it.
Invest in yourself, determine to be happy with or without him. Ignore his cheating as*
I’d step out of the way and let them handle their relationship.
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I think deep down you know the answer to this……”if you love him set him free. If it was meant to be it will be” that will tell you volumes but until you take that leap he will continue to play his game. Easier said then done but girl it can be done and it might be the best thing you ever do.
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Run. Far. Away.
You should be his best friend.
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If he’s already on a dating site then he already has one foot out the door…
You deserve better than this.
Find someone who is % with you.
Or don’t, you can be happy spending some time just on yourself. Either way this guy is draining your spirit.
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Ask the bestie what she would so if she were you.
Ive had several guy besties and never had a problem talking to their partner or including their partner. Because I like transparency and I don’t want anybody to ever doubt my intention so for me it’s always been important to include my best friend’s other half not necessarily in every single thing that I want them to know I respect the relationship.
However…
On the flip side of that when I was young I wasn’t always as considerate. Also… If I didnt like the other half, I didnt allow them to exist in my world.
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Ya lost me at the 1st line. If he’s willing to treat ANY female BETTER than you, he doesn’t deserve you and it seems he’s setting up his odds to be with this “friend”. He should also NEVER talk shit about you ESPECIALLY with another woman! You deserve MUCH better, my dear!
This sounds like 100% deflection on his part; setting is definitely going on between them or he’s developing feelings for this female. This is manipulation, lovely. Get out before it breaks you or get worse and leads to physical abuse or DEATH.
If you have to fight for his attention he is not the one for you. Us real men treat our woman right and give them the attention they deserve. It’s time to find someone who will give you what you need
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He’s a selfish man child. You should leave immediately. Document all the dating sites. I’m sure you have. Show a divorce lawyer
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I have been there dump him
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Okay let me be as straight as I can here. I was a mans best friend. I’m talking the person he called after every break up ,the person he was on the phone with for hours and then he got a woman pregnant and they started living together. I backed up a whole lot. He used to come over and him,my husband and I would sit down and watch movies and laugh and just like 3 good friends but when he got in a serious relationship I made sure to back up because I am my husbands best friend and I definitely wouldn’t want any female shadowing me. We started hanging less and less and now we barely speak to each other except for pleasantries but his woman is his best friend now and that is how it should be. When you have a spouse that’s your best friend. Everyone else is after. Your man isnt your man. Hes her man. He is painting you as the bad guy so eventually over drinks one day she’ll feel sorry for such a “good guy” who has a sucky relationship and pull her panties down if that haven’t already happened. Cut your losses and do not waste more time. Yes, you’ve invested alot of time and lost it but would you like to lose more?
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He sounds like he’s on his way to cheating or already has. U need to love yourself bc it doesn’t sound like he does.
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You should be your SOs bestie. And if he don’t have time or good things to say to YOU, you can be assured he is saying them to someone else.
Call it a day and bounce.
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Ask yourself why you “love him so much.” Is it because you love the possibility of validation from him? That if maybe he treats YOU well you’ll finally feel worthy?
It sounds like he’s making you miserable. What’s there to love?
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Honey your in love all by yourself. He’s showing you that. Get the hell out and tell him to get screwed. Sorry your never going to get what you want from him. My opinion.
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Your hubby does these things because you allow him to do them. Ignore him as he does you - get dressed up and have a girls night out and have a great time - and no I don’t mean go out flirting with other men I mean just go have fun with your female friends and put this petty worrying in file 13 where it belongs this will either make him or break him and honestly I think he will break because you proved a point that if he can have fun by “cheating or almost cheating” whatever you want to call it that you could actually go out and have fun and still be the good, true, honest wife you are - it might hit home with him at what he could be losing if he continues the bs routine he’s on now and if that doesn’t faze him then hun you might as well pack your bags and go bc he never cared to begin with and without a doubt he is really in love with his best friend after all - now she might not feel the same towards him but the signs are there that he feels more than friendship for her. Good luck in whatever decision you make.
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Narcissists get angry when you see the truth
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Boy have they got her fooled.
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leave his dusty ass and have yourself a hot girl summer baby
Warning sign thats too big to.ignore. tell him you need some time away from him to think this out. And then go somewhere for a few days. Do not call him. Seriously …Do not call him. See how you feel after a few days away. Your decision should be easy to see. Never have a man who is nicer to every female than to you. See how he is when you come.back. your decision but i am pretty sure you will want to leave unless he is beside himself telling you he will do whatever it takes to work things out. If any words.but those come out of his mouth don’t bother to unpack at all. Good luck!!
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Leave he doesnt even wanna be with you anymore. He doesnt even treat you like he wants to be with you or that he is with you.
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Please … I say this with your best at heart
Leave
He will not change
He does it because you allow it. Honestly he’s very disrespectful and it’s probably not going to get better. I would walk away and find someone that will make you his queen.
Marriage counseling STAT! You are not communicating well with each other. You are mad he is venting his frustrations to his friend. How do you talk to your friends about him? Don’t you complain once in a while? Once you get things off your chest, you can go back and have a happy marriage. What would he think if he heard what you say about him?
Having said that, maybe ask what he’s looking for that he’s not getting at home. If you’re both yelling all the time or accusing each other, that’s not healthy and will drive you apart. Pick a time when you’re both calm, maybe out at dinner with a glass of wine. Or just save it all for the counseling sessions.
You might find out that he has already checked out of the marriage. If so, the counselor can continue with you or refer you to resources to help you move on.
It sounds like you’ve both invested time, effort and love in this relationship, and he’s just started looking to see what’s out there and testing the waters, but nothing physical has happened yet. I hope you can both learn and grow and rekindle the romance, but if not, we will continue to support you in your journey. 
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Lose him. You know what he’s like, he isn’t going to change. Dont give him anymore of your time. You love him? No love is worth the despair you will feel when you truly understand his betrayal to a third party, it is NOT love. If a man is disclosing facts about you to his friend, who is she telling? Your life is no longer private. He may well be lying to her about you, mine did…for 40 years. Be proactive, lose him.
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Get out now…
If not, look up Narcissist, if that still dont help, look up victims of narcissistic behavior and see how you feel then.
Im sorry.
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If you have to beg for attention or to be treated a certain way from your spouse, then you’re with the wrong person.
Seems like you love him and want this to work but there are red flags all over this! 
Please don’t settle for less, when you deserve to be treated like a queen! 
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Simple rule: respect your relationship, respect the other person. If neither of you can so that then you shouldn’t be together and if you have children together, what kind if example do you think your putting out there for them.
It sounds like he is making excuses to make himself feel better about what he was/is doing. I wouldn’t trust for a minute that he isn’t still doing things behind your back. He is trying to paint you as the bad guy so his actions looks justified to his best friend if she finds out what he has been up to and to himself. You don’t have to continue being disrespected
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If you allow a man to treat you bad then thats what you will vet so set your standards high so you can get a man that treats you like a princess . Also to have good man you have to be a good women . Amen
Oh no,this is sad.This is not love but obsession.
You seem like someone who is running away from yourself or looking for validation.
Yes you love him but do you love yourself? What is it inside of you that you trying to cover up or the void you are trying to fill.
I would rather see a therapist if I were you and address my own issues.
It’s not normal to need someone this much ,infact I don’t personally want anyoy being clingy to me.
He is treating you so badly but you still want him
Everyone has or should their “person” they can be open and vent to
It doesn’t have to be their partner and in some cases is best not to be
Now the flirting is another thing completely and I would’ve dipped immediately
It appears you’ve already lost him. I wonder what things were said for him to feel that way. Even though you didn’t mean what you said you did say them and some lines can’t be uncrossed. There are some things that just make you look at someone differently. Have an honest RESPECTFUL conversation with him where you guys explain what you want from the relationship.
Tell him to f…k off and take it’s best friend with it! 
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He’s cheating on you. Have self respect and ditch his ass